just me being in shambles over this man and giving you some content you didn't ask for.
-------
Here are some random filthy thoughts I have about bf Anton, feel free to stay for the program.
Anton is the type to... pick you up and bounce you on his cock (On an Anton muscle kick rn) I can see him scrolling on twitter and seeing this girl get destroyed while being bounced on someone's cock, he knew he had to try it. He is going to watch your face with each gasp from being dropped on his cock.
Anton is the type to...Lay on your chest just to suck your nipples, Hes in love with your chest and sometimes you wonder if he loves it more than you in general. He gives them kisses, Leaves little hickeys, nibbles on your nipples and tugs at them.
Anton is the type to...take videos to keep for later. This man will watch them when he is horny, for fun, just because he is bored. It does not matter where he is, hes going to hide his screen and put his air pods in so he can watch you take his cock and hear your moans that he always misses.
Anton is the type to...Cuddle in your neck around public so he can secretly kiss it and give you hickeys. He will not admit it, but he hates when you cover his hickeys up, he will even whisper that too you while sucking new ones on your neck
Anton is the type to...Grind into you while you two are spooning. You will hear his little grunt and whines while rubbing his cock against your ass, practically waiting for the moment you turn around to take care of him
Anton is the type to...Tease you till you make the first move; He is not shy or nothing he just wants you to grow the courage to take care of him. He gets spoiled rotten by this as well and once you do it often it is set for life
Anton is the type to...fuck you with his tongue, preferably if you can sit on his face that would be best but either way, he grows euphoric when he feels his tongue enter your hole and tasting every bit of cum you have.
Anton is the type to...grow overwhelmed and pull your hair when giving him head. He will hold your hair anyway but when hes close to his release and you feel his cock twitch and small whimpers leave him he going to grip your hair and hold it so tight it tugs on it
Anton is the type to...take you in doggy and hold your hands behind your back, he finds it so precious when you hold his hand so tight while hes fucking you, he thinks your back is such a sexy sight as well
Anton is the type to...pay for your nails and toes to get done for the purpose of when you have your feet in his lap, he can massage them and admire how cute they’d look around his cock or when he feels your choking him while you ride, he can feel the acrylic nails run against his skin
AWKWARD SHIT ENHYPEN WOULD DO DURING SEX
(Legal line only lmao you thought)
Warnings: smut, me trying to be a comedian, dirty talk, injuries, shower sex, ass eating, I tried my best please laugh at me <3
Lee Heeseung
Would go wayyy too far with the dirty talk and say something dumb as fuck😭
He’ll be eating you out and tell you that he’ll “eat the fucking shit out of you”
“Please don’t” you say and he kisses the back of his teeth in annoyance saying “you knew what the hell I meant”
You did not know what the hell he meant
Park Jay
Doesn’t know his own strength
Will land you on an episode of “sex sent me to the ER” 💀
He’s getting it from the side and everything’s going well
Until he pushes your leg up too roughly and dislocates your fucking hip
You went from screaming in pleasure to screaming in pain
“JAY WHAT THE FUCK!!”
“I’M SORRY I THOUGHT YOU WERE FLEXIBLE”
Sim Jaeyun
🤦🏾♀️
He’s always up to some shit I’m 😭tired of him
He finally convinced you to have shower sex with him
Fucking you against the wall
Until he slips on the soap and falls😀
grabs you in an attempt to stabilize himself but pulls you down with him instead
So now y’all are on the floor outside the shower, tangled in the shower curtain
Cold and wet
Will ask you if you’re okay as you lowkey suffocate underneath him
“Do I look fucking okay Jake?” you grumble
“That attitude won’t get you anywhere”
“GET OFF OF ME”
Park Sunghoon
Will try to eat your ass without permission 😭
He’s going down on you and is super into the moment
Thinking he’s the shit
Gets too confident and let’s his tongue slip down over your asshole
You go stiff, sitting up quickly and he sits up too
Now y’all just looking at each other
“What the fuck hoon”
“Did you not want your ass ate?” He asks with his head tilted
You tell him no and he scoffs, saying something about how “millions of girls would die to have their ass eaten by him”
Please humble him💀
Kim Sunoo
It’s your first time with him right
You ask him what position and he says “ass up face down” so you turn around and do as he says
About 30 seconds later you still don’t have dick in you🤨so you turn around confused
Only to see him with HIS ASS UP INSTEAD
“Sunoo what the fuck???” You say and he turns back to look at you
“What?” He mumbles shyly “is this not what you meant?”
Please help him he’s just a little bit dumb
(not actually I love him)
FUCK.. 😵💫
OHMYGOD yessir i'll do anything and everything for you ohmygod why can i imagine him saying that during sex im actually losing my shit rn can he please fuck me already?
lee heeseung. WHY WOULD U SAY THAT.
PSA: Ensure you always wrap it up
You could see that he was watching you for the corner of your eye. He was cute, tall, big build. You took a sip the drink you held in your hand, this was a normal night for you, go out, find a man of your taste, go back to his then leave as soon as he fall asleep.
Relationships were too messy, you'd rarely been able to successfully have one. You made the decision to satisfy your own needs and leave romance out of it.
Little did you know you caught his attention as well, you stuck out of the crowd to him and that perked his attention. He walked over to the bar and stood next to you while trying to get the attention of the bartender.
Whiskey sour
Your eyes never left your drink while your ears zoned in on his voice, smooth like butter. His dark hair was slicked back, his eyes were focused on the bartender and his jaw was embellished with stubble. You couldn't help but wonder what it would feel like against your skin
"I haven't seen you here before" you spoke up
His eyes darted to you before he smirked. He turned to face you, his eyes focused on yours.
"Not really my seen" you shivered at the sound of his voice
"Taecyeon"
"Y/N"
The bartender slid his drink over to him and he responded with a simple nod
"Pretty name" he took a sip of his drink
"Your place or mine" You chuckled at the surprised look on his face
"Yours then?"
He pressed you against the front door of his apartment his hand squeezing your thoughts under your dress. The sound of an older couple grumbling as they walked by made you both chuckle.
He opened the door and you were shocked at how extravagant it was. He wrapped his arms around your waist and pressed his lips into your neck sucking lightly, your hands went up to hair and raked through it.
His hands moved from your waist and up to cup your breasts. You could feel his erection pressing up against you. His fingers hooked the straps of you dress, pulling them down and exposing your breasts to the cool air. His fingers traced down the back of your neck and unzipped your dress. He let you go then walked over to his couch and sat down.
"Continue" he leaned back on the couch
Your hand automatically pushed your dress down to your feet, leaving you in your panties. You got down onto your hands and knees and crawled over to him. He placed his finger underneath your chin and placed a soft kiss on your lips.
He leaned back and lift his hips slightly. You took that as your go ahead. You unbuckled his belt, your hand trembling slightly. Something about him was more demanding than most men you've met.
He pushed off his pants and to your surprise he wore no underwear, you wrapped your fingers around his cock and slowly took him into your mouth, he leaned his head back onto the edge of the couch with a groan. You could feel him twitch under your hand, your tongue swirled around the tip of his cock. You looked up at him and your gaze met his, his hair was slick across his for head despite the cool air from the air conditioning.
He leaned forward, causing you to stop. He'd made makeshift handcuffs with his belt. He stood up, bound your hand together and sat you down on the couch
He placed you legs up onto the couch and spread them apart, you shivered at the feeling of his lips on your covered pussy. You lifted your hips allowing him to take off your panties, he placed your thighs on his shoulders and his tongue met your clit. You arched your back, a moan slipping past your lips.
His fingers dug into your hips, preventing you from moving as mouth devoured you. Your groaned at the sudden loss of sensation. He crawled on top of you, pushing your legs closer to your chest as he pushed into you.
Not a sound came out of your mouth as his hips met yours. His thrusts started slowly making you whine, he couldn't help but smile.
"What do you want?" He teased
"Please"
"What do you want" he repeated
"Fuck me faster" he chuckled and his thrusts became rougher, his hand wrapped around your neck. His fingers pressed against your clit, rubbing rhythmically.
"Please, let me touch you" you begged
"Not until you cum" his thrusts were suddenly harder. Your brain was in a complete haze as you felt yourself coming near the edge
"Do you want to cum?" You nodded unable to form a sentence
"Why should I let you?" He teased, slowing down the movement of his hips and fingers
"Please, Taecyeon" his paced picked up again throwing you into an orgasim
His hands left your body and gripped the back of the couch, his thrusts were rushed and his breathing was labored, he pulled out and decorated your torso with is cum.
"Next time we're doing this on my bed"
For the anon who wanted more Taec smut. Hope you like it!
NYX
IN WHICH you realize you never completed your most important new year's resolution: losing your virginity. luckily, your roommate is willing to help you out with that
WARNINGS ⨯ smut, porn with a smidge of plot for context, not proofread cuz who needs that, fingering, orgasm denial (briefly), missionary, very vanilla sex, heeseung's kinda awkward #pathetic_men
WORD COUNT ⨯ 3.1k
AUTHOR'S NOTE . . . first work of the year!! sorry for taking an impromptu break so suddenly, but my works will still be coming out slowly as of now, so thank you for your patience 🫶
# TAGLIST ! @wonkifangirl @chlorinecake @sunjaywoning @jaeyunthejakesim @deobitifull @notevenheretbh1 @jvngw0nlvr @jongszn @ineedsomezzz @haelahoops @seongslutt @fakeuwus @leeheeheeseung @aheewonenthusiast @lprww @wonsbaer @heeseungssidechick @smisworld @rayofsunshineeee @starrypen @heerated @snwosgf @nycapartmentsworld @sooyeonvida @dear-hoon @nikiiitties
“We never finished sharing our new year’s resolutions.”
You stop mid-bite into your pancakes. You and Heeseung had spent all morning making them, finally testing out the new oven you got after the last one broke down during another pancake morning. It survived, luckily. There’s only the taste-test left, but Heeseung’s comment catches you so off guard, you put the fork back down.
“New year’s resolutions?” you repeat. “You mean the ones from basically last year?”
He nods, shoving his first bite in. He hums at the taste. Success. “Yeah, we made those lists and started sharing but then—” Heeseung tilts and quirks his brow in thought. “—I can’t even remember. We probably got distracted, but either way, we never made sure we both completed our lists.”
Chuckling awkwardly, you keep your eyes on the plate. “I don’t even know if I still have mine—”
“I do,” Heeseung interrupts. “We put them in that box, remember? I found it this morning, that’s why I thought to bring them up, ha.”
“You didn’t, er, read them, did you?”
Heeseung shakes his head, chewing through another bite. “I thought it’d be fun to go through them and see what we’ve done or not.” He lightly taps his fork around his plate. “We’ve got a few days before the new year starts, no plans, I don’t know…”
“No, no, yeah, I get it,” you assure, nodding quickly. “I just, um, they were stupid. I was stupid. This year changed me, you know?”
Your roommate looks at you with a teasing glint in his eye. “Oh yeah?” He watches you nod again. “All the more reason to get them.” And before you know it, he’s rushing to his room to, you assume, get the box he’d mentioned earlier.
It’s not long before he’s practically skipping back into the kitchen-dining area bringing the box. Tossing his plate aside, he sets the box in between you two and sits back down. You’re anxious at how he unfolds the lid and pulls out two sheets of crumpled paper.
“Yours was the one with the rip at the top,” you say, reading the questions in his mind. Your face flushes as you realize that’ll only prompt him to take it out the other first.
He smiles at you before hiding his face behind the paper. He begins to read it out loud. “Resolution one: Learn how to make (good) pancakes—” Grabbing his fork, he clinks it twice against the porcelain. “Check. Number two: Make weekly savings—Check, right?”
You hum, your leg shaking beneath the table.
“Alright, and then—” He lowers the paper. Your eyes widen. “Lose my virginity?”
“Okay!” you say overenthusiastically. “See! I was being stupid, such a dumb thing to write on a new year’s resolution list, right? Haha, so funny, let’s just throw these out—”
“Wait, but we can cross this off, though, right? You had that boyfriend?”
“He wasn’t my boyfriend,” you clarify. “He was… gross. I never really liked him like that, so it just never happened. It’s whatever, I’m a virgin, okay, let’s move on. Isn’t the next thing I put down like eat more salads—”
“You’re still a virgin?”
You look at him bewildered. What was up with the intonation? Was it really shocking? Why does he even care? You suppose he’s always been the nosy type, just never assumed it would translate to this, as well.
He seems to realize the second meaning to his words and fumbles to take them back. “Okay, not like—I didn't mean it in a weird way, I’m just surprised that you’re... you know?”
“It’s… whatever,” you clarify. “It’s fine. It’ll happen at the right moment, right? That’s what they all say.” You'd shovel another bite into your mouth and you can’t help but taste the bitterness from your words with the sweetness of the syrup. “I’ll get over it when it’s done and gone.”
Heeseung clears his throat, paper discarded to the side, his eyes fixed on your plate in deep thought. “Do you…”
You raise a brow.
“Do you want my help?”
-
In your defense, you really hate being a virgin. Not that it’s embarrassing or shameful to be one, but the fact that you swore to yourself that you wouldn't be a virgin anymore since last year makes you want to crumble up inside.
You just don’t want to embarrass yourself in front of your past self. Imagine her laughing at you? That’s a new low.
Which leads to this moment right now. Laying in Heeseung’s bed, in Heeseung’s room, waiting for Heeseung to come back into said room with the “supplies” he was rushing out to get.
The door slowly swings open as Heeseung pushes it with his back, his hands full. He makes eye contact with you and a pout makes its way across his lips. “You’re still wearing your clothes?”
Your eyes snap open wider. “Yes?!”
“We’re gonna have sex, Y/N, your clothes aren’t supposed to be on.” He smiles at you as he sets down lube and condoms.
A wave of relief washes over you when you realize he’s just teasing. Heeseung’s a gentleman, but it’s not like you've gotten the chance to know the side of him you two swore to never let you meet. He could’ve been a weirdo creep for all you knew, as long as he was paying his half of the rent it never mattered until right now.
“Do you want me to turn around when you take them off?” Yep, just the same old awkwardly sweet Heeseung you’ve always known.
You smile, albeit nervously. “You’ll see me naked anyway, might as well put on a strip performance to get you in the mood.”
He laughs at your sarcasm, then points to the lights. “We could turn those off if you want.”
For a moment, you consider it. If not for the hopes of Heeseung seeing the least possible, but for the ambiance. Do people leave the lights on or off during sex? Not like you know. Ultimately, you shake your head, getting off from the bed and sticking your hands under the hem of your shirt. “Ready?” you ask him, though the question is more internalized.
His hum is muffled by his hands reaching at the collar of his shirt.
At once, you two pull your shirts off together.
Standing bare chest to bare chest - with bra - you eye him carefully. “You take your shirt off from the top?”
“What?”
You mirrored his previous action. “You took your collar and pulled your head through the neck hole first—” your words muffle as you reenact it sloppily. “Normal people take their arms out first.”
Heeseung stiffles a laugh behind his hand. “Aren’t you supposed to try to seduce me?”
“Is this not sexy?”
“Oh, please, go on, you’re making me hard.”
The two of you laugh and you realize you’re not so nervous anymore. The anxious jitters left your hands and you can feel your muscles relaxing. It’s just Heeseung. Just Heeseung.
As he recovers from a fit of laughter, you look at him in a way you haven’t taken the chance to ever since you met almost two years ago. His arms that flex when he wraps them around himself. His smile which switches to a sly smirk when he’s resisting the urge to laugh louder. His hair that falls neatly into place, over his eyes that glint to the point you can’t take your gaze away from them.
Heat rushes to your cheeks.
He’s attractive. Yeah, that’s been obvious.
Your type? Maybe…
But this is different. And, oh god, he’s going to have sex with you.
Heeseung clears his throat, snapping you out of your daze.
“Pants?” he asks cautiously. His eyes are brimmed with concern, probably sensing your confused thoughts, clearly not understanding what you’re telling yourself.
You respond by tugging at your sweatpant laces, letting them drop down dramatically. Heeseung keeps his eyes glued to your movement, eyes widening at the sight of your bare legs and white panties. He quickly reaches for his belt.
To your surprise, you can see that he’s, at the very least, getting hard. Maybe it’s nerves. You try not to think too much about the possible influence the sight of your almost-bare body has on him.
Still, to test the waters and ease or completely disrupt your mind, you ask, “Can you help me with my bra?”
He fumbles an answer, you’re pretty sure you hear a ‘yes’ through his blabs, as he kicks out of his pants fully and stumbles to your side of the bed. You turn your back to him, giving him the cue by raising your hair away from the clasp.
Shivers run down your spine at his gentle, warm touch on your skin. You never knew you were sensitive, but with every simple movement, every brush against your back has you feeling goosebumps running up your arms.
Heeseung’s breath is hollow behind you.
When the clasp is finally undone, you pull your arms out of the straps, letting the material drop to the floor with your other discarded clothes.
You turn to face Heeseung, his eyes saying more than any words could mean. Stunned, he asks, “Can I kiss you?”
“Yes,” you whisper in return, eyes drifting down to his mouth.
He doesn't hesitate to lean in. His arms naturally slide around your waist, pulling you flush against his body as his lips hungrily crash into yours. You gasp through the initial shock of ferocity, relaxing into his hold with your hands coming up to the nape of his neck.
His fingers squeeze your skin pulling a sound from your mouth, muffled by his lips. You don’t even notice the way his knees push you back until you’re laying on the bed, lips still attached to Heeseung’s, but even those pull away eventually. You almost get up onto your elbows to chase after his touch, but stop yourself at the sight of his intense gaze.
Your gazes lock with each other for a moment, before he finally breaks contact to rush to the bedside cabinet where the lube bottle sits. He pours a generous amount on his fingers, rubbing the gel slowly. He eyes the way it reflects the light and this one reaction makes you think he’s never seen it before, but you doubt it — you’ve heard his sexual escapades thanks to your graciously thin walls.
“I’m going to finger you first,” Heeseung interrupts your thoughts.
You simply hum in return, letting your legs fall apart for him to get back into place, between them.
Heeseung has one hand on your thigh, the other levitates over your skin with nearly-dripping lube, but his eyes are on yours, waiting for another nod before he can continue.
Giving him the signal, you aren’t prepared for the chill that runs down your spine at the cold sensation of the lube on your sensitive skin. Soon enough, though, your gasps turn to gentle hums as Heeseung draws little circles on your bare pussy.
“This okay?”
You nod needily.
One finger finally intrudes, swimming through your walls and curls to find that certain spot. Your hips roll into it—you never thought it'd be this different from your own fingers.
“More,” you whimper.
“Already?” Heeseung teases, but you can hear partial genuinity in his tone.
Wordlessly, your hand reaches down to his, pulling at it to get another finger inside of you.
Heeseung chuckles in disbelief, but doesn't disobey your request.
Two fingers in and you’re letting soft gasps escape your lips, eyes already threatening to roll back at the rhythmic pattern Heeseung’s keeping up. He pushes in, pulls out, pushes back in and curls into you. You match his pace with your hips, hoping to deepen his touch. He’s so close, so close to where you need him.
Meanwhile, his thumb rolls gently over your clit to ease the tension of the stretch. It helps, making your head spin and forcing you to focus entirely on the pleasure you feel, rather than the pain.
Heeseung doesn't warn you when he slips in a third, but you’re busy throwing your head back, moaning to tell him off for it.
“Fuck,” you whisper to the ceiling. “‘Is so good.”
Your back arches as Heeseung’s fingers reach your G-spot, curling and tickling the bundle of nerves, ripping out more muffled moans, your hand thrown to your mouth not to disturb the neighbours.
“Right there!” you moan. “Right—shit, yes—Right there!” When he keeps at it, you can't hold on much longer. “Fuck, I’m so close—”
And then it’s gone.
All the pleasure is ripped away from you as Heeseung pulls out of you coldly, barely looking your way as he turns to the bedside cabinet.
“Hey,” you whine, albeit childishly.
It’s as if something clicks and he turns back to you. “Sorry,” he singsongs out. “I didn’t want you to come so soon, I still have to actually fuck you, right?”
You pout, but ultimately he’s right. That’s what you're here for. “Fine.”
He fumbles with the condom packet, eventually giving up at going at it with his lubed-fingers and rips the package with his teeth.
“I could’ve helped,” you tell him, smiling teasingly.
“I got it. I got it.” He waves his hand at you before he uses that same hand to roll down the condom and—Holy. Shit. He’s packing.
You never took the time to think about his size, though you probably would've determined it was a decent size from the outline of it when he's chilling on the couch with sweats on.
But now that it's out, hard and flush against his toned abs? You take a deep breath and try not to think too much about how it must taste, how it’d feel to have him down your throat—as if you even know how to give a proper blowjob. Maybe he could guide you, holding your head from the back and pushing it back and forth rhythmically up and down his cock and—
“Y/N?”
“Huh?”
“I asked if you’re sure about this?”
He’s pumping his cock as he asks. You resist the urge to lick your lips.
“Yes,” you say. “I’m ready.” And there’s no lie in your words.
Heeseung crawls back onto the bed once more, staying on his knees when his body is lined up with yours. He nods to himself and you before lining up his dick with your entrance, one hand falling to the side of your head, the other resting on your lower stomach as he pushes in slowly.
The intrusion is unfamiliar. The stretch hurts more than expected. Yet, your mouth is agape in frozen pleasure — Heeseung let his hand fall lower and is now drawing circles on your clit to ease the tension.
He keeps his thumb on your pussy while slowing his movement to a stop. “Tell me when I can move.”
Instead of relaxing into the stretch, preparing yourself for more friction, you focus entirely on Heeseung’s movements on your clit. Rolling the bud of pleasure between his two fingers, your eyes flutter shut in pleasure.
You test the waters by flexing your core muscles, squeezing your walls against Heeseung’s cock.
“Fuck,” he groans, snapping his hips forward at once, but he quickly stops himself. Heeseung looks up at you with cutely worried wide eyes. “Shit, sorry—Are you okay?”
You giggle. “Go!” you say between laughs, rolling your hips down to get him going.
He doesn't need to be told twice. He quickly resumes his previous thrust, your legs are naturally pushed apart to give him more access—moans spill from your lips at the newfound depth he reaches.
Heeseung’s head dips, his hair falling over his face, but does nothing to hide his expressions. You watch him for a moment, reveling in how good your pussy is making him feel. You clench around him again and his mouth falls open. He lets out the most harmonious sound you never expected from him but want to hear again and again.
So, you roll your hips into his, until your lower stomachs are threatening to brush against each other, until Heeseung lowers from his hands to elbows, and your bodies are flushed against each other. Your skins are sticky with sweat, but you can’t be bothered. Not with his rhythmic thrusts reaching so deep inside of you. Not with his fingers still playing with your clit, torturing the bud with nonstop pleasure. Not with his lips so close to your mouth, and your head pulling itself upward to capture them in another kiss.
Your hands snake to the back of his head, curling into his messy hair and pulling gently to bring him closer to you. His free hand finds its way into your hair, too, pushing the flyaways back into the rest of the mess, away from your face, before it rests gently on your neck, guiding you in the kiss.
“Fuck, baby,” he whispers into your mouth as your walls clench around him again.
Your head spins at his low tone, pleasure bubbling in your stomach in a way it never has before. “I’m—Shit—I’m so close!”
Heeseung takes this as a signal to speed up his fingers on your clit, and slows down his thrusts, deepening them with each push in.
“Come on, come for me.”
And you do.
So much, like never before.
Your back arches into him, head thrown back, letting out a sinful string of moans. You’d curse from the pleasure, but your thoughts aren't coherent enough to form words.
You’re frozen in place, legs shaking as Heeseung pulls out to finish himself off. He jerks off into the condom on top of your wasted body, coming undone as soon as your dazed eyes meet his hungry gaze.
He doubles over, landing on his hand, face mere inches away from yours. “Fuck,” he says.
“Fuck,” you repeat, a giggle in your tone.
“Congratulations,” he says, rolling onto his back to be laying beside you. “You’re no longer a virgin.”
Your weak arms raise in a small celebration. “Yay.”
“How was it?”
You can’t even respond, hands coming up to cover your flushed face. You can feel Heeseung’s smirk behind them.
“I’ll take that as good.” Then, after a beat. “Does that mean you'd want to do it again?”
Your hands fall flat to your sides in one quick movement. “What?”
“There’s so much more I can teach you.”
“No,” you say while shaking your head. He looks defeated, you almost want to reach up and pet him like a dog. “Not until you buy me dinner.”
THANK YOU TO THE USER TO TAKE A DOUBLE ANGLE WE DON'T DESERVE U😭
@/Lee Heesung
— beomgyu & jungwon pack + moment
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ex baby-daddy!eunseok x reader | 6.6k words
another baby daddy riize fic. i do NAWT condone having a baby with a man you’re not married to.
contains: sex without a condom (they’re absolute messes DON’T BE LIKE THEM)
you don’t know how you ended up in front of eunseok’s place. even if you were the one behind the wheel, the one shifting the gears, and the one rolling red stop signs you don’t know how you ended up there. you looked out your driver side window to look at the house you used to call your home across the street. atleast you were in your right mind enough to not park directly in front. but you also knew this was just as bad, in a parked car with the lights off across the street like a stalker.
you knew you could’ve gone home. you could’ve put your car back in drive and come back in the morning to pick up your daughter, pretending like this never happened. but you knew yourself better than that, and you knew that the failed date you went on still weighed heavy on your shoulders.
you turned towards your phone, hoping that something on your device would distract you. but when you opened your phone you saw your lockscreen—your happy little daughter trying to hold a pumpkin the size of her body as you and eunseok helped. you thought about how content you were that day, how you felt like you were truly a happy little family again. you even had a heart to heart with eunseok, talking about how you were too young and just starting your career when you met him. your life was barely on track by the time your daughter came and although you wouldn’t trade her for the world you both humored the idea of meeting later in life. you felt a pang in your chest as you remembered looking down to your daughter who held tightly onto eunseok’s hand while she held her tiny pumpkin in the other.
the person you went on the date with noticed your wandering mind, it was obvious in the way he cleared his throat after you stared at the picture for a little too long.
trying to comprehend your relationship with eunseok was difficult. when you were with him you thought about all the shortcomings in your relationship—the lack of communication, hiding your feelings, keeping things bottled up until they exploded. neither of you were able to save your relationship before it was too late, and it could be argued that you two were better apart. but when you weren’t with him, the only thing you could think about was trying to make it work.
you looked at the man sitting across from you at the dinner table and you imagined it was eunseok. maybe it was the familiarity, maybe you shouldn’t have made the mistake of seeing him before going on your date. because now the only thing you could think about was him, if he was going on dates in secret and if he was thinking of you too. you thought about your daughter, how much you wished you were with her instead of pretending the fancy food on your plate was good.
you knew the moment you started thinking about your family that the date was already over. it would be another endeavor in your long list of failures, all you could think about as you sat in your car was how you gave up a day you had with your daughter for this. you deleted your message history with the man, staring at your most recent text conversations. eunseok sat at the very top, his unread message appearing in the form of a tiny blue dot next to his picture-less icon. you clicked on the message thread, revealing a series of pictures of your daughter and little updates through the night.
eunseok: she likes strawberries alot.
eunseok: playing zelda and animal crossing on the big tv.
eunseok: she’s better than me at zelda now.
eunseok: she told me mommy is going on a date?
eunseok: i hope it goes well.
eunseok: she ate all of her food.
you don’t know why you felt guilty reading the last message. eunseok didn’t have the right to know, and you knew that. you had simply told your daughter in passing that you were going on a date night with your friends, knowing that she would repeat whatever you told her to her father. you typed your reply over and over again, trying to figure out what approach to take.
lol i was going out with some of my friends from wo|
that’s none of your busin|
the date went we|
are you awake?
your mind came up with a million things to say, but none of them felt right. it felt like all of them were attempts at sounding casual. you threw your phone into the passenger seat beside you, and you rolled your neck to try and relieve some of the tension. you let out a sigh and turned your keys in the ignition, letting your car come to life around you.
you pulled out from the parking lot and headed down the road trying to go home. it started off with one wrong turn, your mind confused on where to go from the restaurant. when you had the chance to go back the way you came you felt something take control, and you continued heading down the same road. you took another turn, you even waited at the red light with an unexplainable energy as you tapped the steering wheel. the tension in your neck was gone too as you headed further down the road.
you knew you didn’t have the right to act confused when you finally turned down eunseok’s road.
you let your head rest against the steering wheel when you parked across the street. each time the thought of leaving your car invaded your thoughts, you gently shook your head, feeling the worn leather of the steering wheel cover against your forehead.
“don’t do it.” you said to yourself.
you looked back at the house again, looking at the window that your daughter was sleeping in. you knew that on the other side of the house you couldn’t see, was the window to the room you used to sleep in. you started thinking about eunseok in that bed by himself, drowning in the california king that was too big even for the two of you. you started thinking about if he thought of you before going to bed everyday, if he thought about you tonight and where you were going in your pretty dress.
“don’t do it.” you repeated.
saying it a second time was unnecessary. you said it purely for effect, trying to seem like your better senses were trying to put up a fight. you were already taking your key out of the ignition before you finished your sentence. you had taken your first step out of the car when you repeated the phrase again. you cleared the road quickly, hearing your heels click on the paved road with each step. by the time you made it to the sidewalk you had accepted your fate. you were still weary, slowly making your way across the lawn to the stoop.
when you made it to the small set of stairs you looked to the door in front of you. the last chance you had to go back in your car before you undid all of your hard work. you knew you were being recorded by the ring camera beside the door. you could simply lie if eunseok ever brought it up. you could just say you considered coming to get your daughter before realizing how late it was. eunseok most likely wouldn’t believe you, and you would most likely lie some more trying to tell a convincing story. but your gaze went from the ring camera to the potted plant that stood tall beside you. you looked even lower to the painted rocks that circled the bottom. you let the ring camera catch you crouch down to your heels. the same hand that drove you here picked out the discolored rock that felt hollow.
you held the rock in your hand, feeling the three engraved letters side by side. you held it away from your shadow, letting the moon illuminate the letters. you laughed to yourself for a moment before bringing your other hand to it, feeling for the split in the middle. it was too easy to slide the fake rock open, and to grab the key to the front door out of it.
you stepped through the door, turning the knob so it closed quietly behind you. you took off your heels at the door, hanging your jacket on the coat rack. you felt like an intruder, walking through the house on the balls of your feet trying to be as stealthy as possible. you lurched past your daughters toys in the living room down the hallway to eunseok’s room.
“don’t do it.” you said one more time putting your hand on the doorknob.
you pushed open the door to eunseok’s room slowly. you cursed at the creaky hinges, only letting it fully open when you saw that eunseok’s bed was empty. you didn’t hear him in the bathroom, so you pulled away from the door. you turned around, looking at the pink door of your daughter’s room. you ran your hand over the paint, remembering the day you spent painting it outside. it was the same day you painted the rocks outside. for some reason you believed eunseok would’ve thrown out the rocks you painted, or atleast replace them with new ones. but everything was the same as you left it all those years ago.
when you silently opened the door, you saw your daughter take up a majority of the bed. her stretched limbs forced eunseok to the edge—his arm was slung over the side, and he was so close to falling that his hand touched the ground. eunseok was on his stomach and your daughter was on her back, both of their snores filled the room. for a moment pain flashed across your chest, you missed seeing this more than you thought. your own flesh and blood laid next to your shared history that was so suffocating it took your breath away. it was overwhelming and calming, as painful as it was peaceful.
part of you wanted to stand there for the rest of the night, just watching the two sleep side by side. you were still for a moment, letting your mind replace all the bad memories with the good as you worked up the courage to get closer to eunseok.
all of your steps towards eunseok were careful, walking on the flat part of your foot to not cause the floorboards to creak. you had your eyes trained on your sleeping daughter, making sure she didn’t open her eyes while you crouched close to eunseok’s body.
when you reached your hand in the space between your chest and eunseok’s shoulder, you hesitated. you were frozen looking at eunseok and his cheek pressed into the mattress and his mussed black hair. you hadn’t seen eunseok like this in god knows how long. after you called things off, eunseok put his stoic resolve back up. he put on a mask for you, a facade of furrowed eyebrows and emotionless stares. you had been deprived of eunseok’s softness you almost forgot it existed. now you crouched next to your ex beside the flower lamp on your daughters dresser resisting the urge to run a finger over his soft parted lips or his smooth skin. you almost didn’t want to wake eunseok up, afraid that you would once again have the gentleness taken away from you. you didn’t know you could miss the view of someone you claimed to hate so much.
something inside of you wanted eunseok to know you saw him like this, serene in middle of the night just like when you were together. maybe he would even talk to you in the same raspy voice he always used to talk to you in. maybe if you woke him up fast enough you would be able to experience the eunseok you loved before his mind fully woke up to make him robotic towards you again. so you finished reaching across the space, gently touching his shoulder before you let your hand fully cover the area.
you shook eunseok gently at first. his body was limp underneath your hand, moving whichever way you applied force. you looked past eunseok to your daughter, who had at some point moved on her side to sleep like you. you drew in a breath, applying more pressure behind your hand trying to rouse him. finally he did something, letting out a sigh before shrugging his shoulders.
“go back to sleep baby,” eunseok swallowed and turned his head, facing away from you. “we can play zelda in the morning, i promise.” he mumbled.
even if his voice was barely audible, you still clenched your teeth in worry. your daughter was by no means a light sleeper, but all it could take is mentioning one of her favorite things to have her head shoot up in the middle of her sleep. eunseok ignored you trying to wake him up, you had to lean in close to the back of his head.
“eunseok,” you shook him a little harder “it’s me.” you whispered.
as if you yelled straight into his ear, eunseok shot up from the bed. you were spooked, almost letting out a sound when he turned to you with wide eyes.
“what are you doing here?” he sounded lost as he looked around your daughters dark room. “is something wrong?” he asked.
“no i just.” you looked over eunseok’s shoulder to look at your daughter. she was still snoring, but had turned to face her father. if she woke up now she would never go back to sleep. “i need to talk to you.” you whispered.
eunseok looked at the flower-shaped clock hanging on the wall behind you. he squinted his eyes trying to make sure he was reading the time right.
“at two in the morning?” he asked, voice still raspy.
in that moment you realized it was a mistake coming. nothing good as ever happened between you and eunseok after midnight. but you also realized it was too late to go back, and a small voice in your brain convinced you that you weren’t sleeping in your own bed tonight. so you nodded your head again as eunseok carefully move off the bed to not wake your daughter.
eunseok motioned for you to walk toward shis room but he still led the way. he didn’t care to walk on his tiptoes or avoid the creaky parts of the floor as he rubbed his face.
you looked back to your daughter once more before closing the door behind you. she moved to the center of the bed, taking up the little amount of space eunseok was occupying. you slowly pulled the door closed until you heard it click behind you. when you turned back into the hallway you saw eunseok past the opening in his door, looking at you through the space. he was no longer tired and he didn’t have his eyes squinted in confusion anymore. he held eye contact with you from his room, almost like he was daring you to come in. the implications made your bare feet timid in the hallway, lingering behind each creak on the floorboards as you crossed the threshold into his room.
as if you had never been in the room before, you waited by the doorframe as eunseok closed the door shut beside you. he gave you a second to collect your thoughts, leaning against the closed door as he looked down at you. you tried matching his calm, leaning against the wall until the light switch poked your back. when eunseok crossed his arms you breathed in deeply.
“what are you doing here?” he asked.
you didn’t have an answer. all you could do was cross your arms against your chest and avoid his gaze.
“i don’t know.” you answered.
you could hear eunseok let out a dry laugh from beside you. even in the darkness of his room you could make out the framed photo of you two that sat at his work desk. he followed your gaze and cleared his throat when he saw what you were looking at.
“did you enjoy your date?” eunseok asked.
“that’s none of your concern.” you quipped.
eunseok pushed off of the door, and your eyes followed his back as he walked towards his bed.
“i’ll take that as a no.” he said quietly.
when he turned around to face you, you took a step forward.
“i’m seeing him again.” you lied.
the smug look on eunseok’s face didn’t fade away as he crossed his arms again. you saw him lean against your former side the bed, head tilted as he caught onto your lie.
“oh i’m sure.” he said.
you felt the familiar rage blossom in your chest. suddenly you felt regret, reaching behind you for the doorknob.
“this was a mistake.” you seethe.
before you can turn the doorknob, eunseok takes a step towards you. when you turn the doorknob he takes another step. he clears the space between you two, and continues coming closer until you have to look up at him. eunseok moves his hand to clasp over yours on the doorknob. the warmth of his hand coaxes you to let go of the doorknob, and he brings his other hand to hold yours. you can already feel the heat across your cheeks, and you can see the blush dust across eunseok’s face the longer he looks down at you.
you don’t know why eunseok humors you even though you’re no longer together. you don’t know why he takes his time teasing you. you came to him in the middle of the night in a tight short dress after a failed date. he could’ve taken you in the hallway or the couch in the living room, god knows you deserved it. but he was gentle with you, bringing his hand to brush underneath your chin to keep your head tilted up at him.
“you don’t know why you’re here?” eunseok asked again.
you silently shook your head, knowing he’d show you why. he looked at your lips, and eunseok pressed his leg between yours. the movement made your dress ride up. you remembered that eunseok bought you this dress when he let go of your hand to reach for the zipper. he still remembered that he had to hold the fabric straight to get the zipper to work, and he pulled it down in one smooth motion. you got up from the wall to aid him, and you didn’t protest when the dress became loose on your skin. you only continued to look up at eunseok, feeling your eyes become glassy as the fabric pooled to your feet.
“you still don’t know?” he asked quietly.
eunseok brought his fingers to run over the trim of your bra, letting out a sigh when you tilted your head back in approval. you didn’t have to answer eunseok for him to know your response. he only laughed, teasingly bending down past your lips to kiss your shoulder.
when eunseok moved to your neck you brought your hands to his shoulder. you kept him there, letting your legs bend slightly to rest some of your weight on his leg. he was strong underneath you, the flexing muscle in his thigh made you want to grind against him. before you could do anything else, eunseok worked his kisses up to your ear then completely pulled away.
“let’s go to the bed.” he said.
you complied immediately, making your way to your old side of the bed as eunseok walked around.
both of your stood next to the bed, staring at the other. you waited for his instruction, but eunseok stared at you waiting for your next move. it made you swallow your nerves, and you reached behind you to undo the clasp on your bra. eunseok watched you fully clothed on the other side, completely still as you moved to your underwear. eunseok watched you push your underwear past your knees, until you could step out of them.
as you brought your arms to cross against your chest, eunseok let you watch as he pulled his shirt over his head. you looked at his toned stomach, how he ran his hand down his body before getting to the waistband of his sweats. you moved from foot to foot, trying to not make it obvious how much of a mess you were already becoming. it felt like the first time again, both of you trying to remember what your bodies looked like now. you had stretch marks like tiger stripes now, and eunseok had grown into his body. you no longer felt like the young adult you were when you first met him as eunseok pulled down his sweats to reveal his white briefs. as he reached for the waistband he motioned to the bed, silently telling you to get on first.
you pressed your hands into the foam and crawled to eunseok’s side. you sat back on your legs, perched and ready to listen. eunseok grabbed your hand that was balled up at your sides, kissing your palm after spreading out your fingers. you wanted to press your hand into his toned stomach and travel down until you could squeeze his length over the fabric of his underwear, but you let eunseok kiss every single one of your knuckles as he kept burning eye contact with you. when he let your hand fall back to the bed he reached into the top drawer of the night stand. when your mind caught quickly on you shifted on your knees.
“i’m not seeing anyone.” you said quickly.
“what about your date?” eunseok asked.
you shook your head, hoping that eunseok wouldn’t make you say it out loud. the smug smile that blossomed across his face was enough of a response.
“so no condom?” he teased.
eunseok eyed you carefully as he put the foil packet back down on his dresser. he watched you shrug your shoulders and look away, focusing on fluffing his pillows. he sits back on his haunches as he watched you get comfortable laying on your side. it’s been too long since he’s seen you like this, naked and getting ready for him. seeing the line of your body settle on his sheets makes eunseok want to tell you how much he changed. how he’s not the same twenty-year old who broke your heart by hiding his feelings. he wants to tell you that he’s a responsible adult now, and that his therapist tells him every session he’s making real progress.
when you settle onto the mattress you turn to face him. eunseok notices how you fail to hold eye contact with him longer than a second before turning away. your hand that was rubbing up and down your body goes to fraying thread on the sheets, and your eyes dart away to focus on the wall behind eunseok.
“hurry before i change my mind.” you were anything but convincing. your words had no bite as you patiently waited for eunseok to fall into his place beside you. “you should be thanking me. god knows when’s the last time you had sex.” you said.
even if you tried to seem threatening, eunseok saw your body seize in anticipation when he shifted on the bed. he took his time, going to his back first to fully take off his underwear. he enjoyed seeing you trying to take quick peaks over your shoulder to look at his bare body and hearing your nails scratch the sheets to try and collect yourself.
eunseok put his hand on the side of your knee when he shifted his body again. he ran his hands up slowly, his touch light as a feather to try and make bumps erupt across your skin. eunseok scooted his body closer to yours, his arm that was between his body and the mattress fell into place underneath your neck.
the two of you went into your old routine, muscle memory of your past together in bed guided your movements. you both told yourselves your bodies were acting on their own accord. that was the excuse echoing around in both of your heads as you scooted your body back to meet eunseok’s and why he pressed a soft kiss to your shoulder blade. you gasped from the feeling, and suddenly the familiarity between you two filled the room. the closeness of your bodies was nearly blinding, you put your hand over eunseok’s that had found it’s place on your ass.
eunseok foolishly thought that this position would protect him, that not being able to see your face would help him have emotionless sex with you. but feeling your fingers seamlessly intertwine with his made his heart pound against your back. each time he tried to slightly pull back you only followed him, chasing after the warmth of him against you. he thought fast to distract you before you could point it out, he reluctantly separated his hand from yours to lift your leg, making it come over his. the change made you lean forward to put your hand on the mattress to stabilize yourself. eunseok leaned forward, and wrapped his arm that was under you underneath your chest to bring you close.
“the last time i had sex?” when your leg was locked over eunseok’s he used his fingers to swipe at your folds. you preened your ass backwards, making a sound of embarrassment at how wet you were. “it was when i came over to help you with your tv, remember?” he whispered.
eunseok let the memories flood over you as both of your bodies shivered. it was months ago, you needed help putting together and setting up the brand new television you got for christmas. you were never much of the handyman, and eunseok wanted an excuse to come over to your new place. so while she was at daycare eunseok was invited over, and just like now one thing led to another until you were on top of eunseok. he remembers trying to kiss your knees that were bruised from being pressed to the ground and you told him to go away. he also remembers after the fact you used the excuse that you were lonely due to the holiday season. but now it was summer and you were moaning for him like you always used to. when eunseok pressed his lips to the side of your face you didn’t tell him to go away, you only turned your head to give him better access.
“you said you hated me then.” eunseok said.
eunseok pushed two fingers into your heat and a satisfied smile spread across his face when your lips parted. he sees you nod your head, trying to form a coherent sentence.
“i do.” you respond.
you can barely get through your sentence without your voice pitching upwards. eunseok feels you attempt to push your hips back to meet hie fingers.
“you still hate me?” eunseok slips in a third finger to try and change your mind. “after all these years?” he asks.
“i do.” you say, shaking your head.
eunseok talks your mixed signals as a sign he’s doing something right. maybe by the third time you come to him like this he will get you to say no, maybe even have you initiate the kiss first. he uses it as motivation to keep pumping his fingers into your heat, and bringing you closer by the hand that’s on your chest.
when you try wedging your hand between your bodies to find eunseok’s dick, he moves out of the way. he shakes his head in the crook of your neck. he imagines the look of frustration on your face, the one that’s seared into the back of his eyelids as he lifts your leg. you fall forward once again from the new angle and eunseok lets you.
“fuck me please, eunseok.” you whine into the sheets.
you use the rest of your strength to push your body back to its side and you moved eunseok’s hand down to your chest. he can feel your heart jumping in its cage as you continue whining for him. his chest swells when he feels your desperate hand reach down again to grab his dick. he lets you and looks down to guide his dick to your hand. when you hold him it’s his turn to whine. he forgot what it was like to be touched by you that he has half a mind to ask you to just jerk him off. maybe he’ll turn you around, just so he can see your eyes blow out with lust as he finishes. but just like always does he keeps his thoughts to himself and lets you decide what you want. when you pull his fingers out of your hole he leans forward, letting his hard dick press against your ass.
both of you are so desperate your movements become rushed. eunseok ruts his dick into your ass from the haste, and you clench your hand around his dick. you pump his length a few times, just wanting to hear the man behind you sigh contently trying to hold back his moans. you continue to do it, letting the slick sounds of his precum between your hands fill the room until his sighs turn to quiet whines.
“turn around.” eunseok kisses your shoulder, pressing his lips into your skin to muffle his words “look at me.” he begs.
you ignore him, even though you both know you can hear him. you both know that the position you’re in currently is too intimate for people who claim to hate eachother. you both know that eye contact is dangerous, that it would only bring back feelings you both put so much energy into denying. so eunseok lets you ignore him and plays off his pleads by lightly biting your skin. you moan from the pain that lights your body like a fire, and eunseok puts his hand over yours to guide his dick the rest of the way.
“ready?” eunseok asks.
eunseok says it just as quiet as his previous plead. when you nod and whimper out a yes he feels his heart drop. he knows it was an act of self preservation, but he wished to see your face. he had to settle for his imagination and your sounds when he pushed his tip past your entrance, pushing every inch inside you you until his hips kissed yours. you sucked him in and kept his dick in place, fitting around him like a glove. there was no better feeling in the world, nothing tasted better than the salt from your skin that stayed on eunseok’s lips. he put his hand on your ass to spread you out enough to draw his hips back. he heard you fist the sheets and he felt you grab his hand on your chest to steady yourself. he slid back in just as slow, cursing each time your walls seized around him.
it had been too long. eunseok was actively abandoning all of his instincts feeling you around him. he felt himself caring less and less about not wearing a condom the closer he got.
“i’m gonna cum if you keep clenching around me like that” he grunted into your shoulder.
eunseok moved his hand on your ass to press his hand deep into your lower stomach, causing you to push your hips further back. he swore he could feel himself inside of your stomach, and the sound that ripped from your throat made him believe you felt it too. the new angle let eunseok push his hips further into you. you could no longer hold your head upright as you let it fall into the pillows to muffle your sounds. even now you held back, trying to keep some shred of your dignity.
eunseok lifted his head to try and look down at you. he could see your eyes closed from the pleasure, and the thin layer of sweat that glistened across your face. the tiny beads and your supple skin caught in the moonlight. eunseok bent down to kiss your cheek, trying to entice you to turn your head again. for the second time, eunseok could tell you were ignoring him. he forgot what you were trying to protect yourself from as he felt your walls seize around him again. it was getting sporadic, and your breaths were turning into quick huffs. when your hand tightened over his eunseok used his leg to raise yours even more. his hand on your stomach found your clit quickly, rubbing circles that complimented his thrusting. you finally turned your head from the mattress, you even turned a little further to look eunseok in the eyes.
“i’m so close, seok.” you whispered.
eunseok saw you close your eyes and catch your bottom lip between your teeth, another telltale sign of you trying to focus. you dragged his hand that gripped your chest to your neck. you looked down at you trying so desperately to take the tenderness from this moment. if eunseok squeezed his hand around your neck like you wanted, it would be easy for you both to claim this was simply just a horny mistake, a borderline hate-fuck. he made that mistake the first time, hand around your neck as he told you how much he hated you. he looked into your eyes when he said it, trying to revel in the way your eyes flashed in pain between the moments of bliss. he didn’t mean it then but he definitely didn’t mean it now—like he said before he has changed.
so instead of pressing his fingers into the veins on the side of your neck he traveled up to your chin, turning your head so you were forced to look at him. you were shocked, eyes so wide and your face so close to his eunseok could see himself in the reflection of your pupils. he placed a kiss right on your lips, not pulling back until he felt your lips move against his. he sees himself in your eyes again, and he sees his spit glistening on your lips. he feels himself inside of you, and he feels your warmth cover his entire being.
“i think i was made for you.”
eunseok meant to say it quietly just for himself as a silent realization, but the way you nod makes him believe it to be true. eunseok feels you get your strength back as you push your hips backwards to meet his hard and deep thrusts.
“you still are.” you moaned.
he tells himself that you are just talking to fill the void of silence. eunseok also tells himself that you can’t bring yourself to ignore him for the third time this night when you’re looking him right in eyes. regardless, eunseok can also feel himself getting closer as you clench repeatedly around his twitching dick.
“oh my god.” you moan.
eunseok pulls your body closer when he feels you shudder against him. you start driving your hips back without rhythm, trying anything you can to keep the stimulation going. eunseok still looks down at you as you cum, and he smiles at the irony of you trying so hard to keep eye contact. you give into closing your eyes when he slips a finger into your mouth, and he can feel the vibration of your moans around his digit.
when you start getting weaker, and settling into eunseok’s hold he pulls his hand from your clit to pull out. when you open your eyes again they’re glassy. they’re no longer half lidded as you grab eunseok’s wrist, stopping him from pulling out.
both of you look down at your hand. you look almost as shocked as eunseok, like something came over you to stop him from pulling out. eunseok takes it in stride, pushing back into you with a force that has you moaning around his finger. you turns your head even further to face him. he kisses the apple of your cheek and then your lips, smiling against your pout.
“you want another baby?” eunseok moved down from your cheek to your jaw. “you really wouldn’t be able to get rid of me then.” he whispered once he made it to your ear.
before you could say anything back, eunseok latched onto the skin right below your ear, sucking and pressing his teeth in the area below your jaw. the stimulation made your lower half sink further down onto the mattress, until you were relying fully on eunseok’s strength to keep your body up. memories flood back to eunseok, but the way he still remembers how you sound and respond to everything makes him think he never forgot in the first place. both of your bodies move simultaneously, when he pulls away from your neck you tilt your head to give him access to the other side. you preen your neck towards him, whimpering quietly when he lingers above the spot.
“oh my god.” you start shaking and eunseok feels your nails dig into his skin. “too much.” you whimper.
eunseok turns your head back around to press let his face rest against yours. you still suck around his fingers, and he can feel you turn your head to kiss whatever parts of his face you can reach. you still clamp around him, your cum adds to the lewd sounds that fill the room.
“can i cum inside?” eunseok asks.
eunseok closes his eyes and focuses on everything about you. he hold back until he feels your head nod against his.
“please.” you bring your hand behind you to run through his hair. “i miss you so much” you whimper around his fingers.
“i miss you more.” eunseok whispers.
he doesn’t hold back anymore as he empties into you. he turns to the crook of your neck, sucking harshly at your skin to relieve even more of the tension. when his hips still you take the lead, plating your hand onto the mattress to give your hips more stability. eunseok grips your ass, kneading the flesh desperately to try and ground himself. he pulls away from your skin to whimper into your ear.
you two can no longer speak, only communicating through the hushed sounds of euphoria. eunseok brings both of his hands to wrap around you, bringing your body as close to his as possible. you can no longer push your hips back from the new angle and that’s exactly what eunseok wants. he forces you both to stay still, to feel all of it—the way his dick pulses inside of you as he cums deep inside of you. even when eunseok gives you all he has, you both stay in that position. you both settle deeper into the bed, catching your breath as your skin doesn’t break contact.
neither of you want to be the first to speak or to force the other one to come back to reality. so you two remain silent as eunseok pulls out. you don’t say a word when eunseok turns your body around to face him, or when he pulls the covers over your sweaty bodies. he returns the favor by saying nothing when your nestle into his chest and you guide his arm to wrap around your body.