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how do i make my writing more ‘mature’? i always feel like no matter how sophisticated i write and no matter every which way i change it up it always has a sense of being childish or juvenile.

Making Writing Sound More Mature

1 - Better Plot and Story Structure - One of the telltale signs of juvenile writing is a story that meanders, has no obvious plot or structure, has no conflict or has a protagonist with no goal. So, make sure you have a well fleshed out plot, with a conflict, protagonist goal, and which hits the beats specific to your story's genre.

2 - Three-Dimensional Characters - If you're writing plot-driven fiction, make sure your main characters have a fleshed out personality, stakes, motivation, goal, and compelling relationships with other characters. If you're writing fully or partially character-driven fiction, do all of the above, but also make sure your main characters have a relevant internal conflict and a thoughtful character arc.

3 - Well-Developed Setting and World - One common hallmark of juvenile writing is a lack of "sense of place" and under-developed world building. So, make sure you put a lot of thought into where your story takes place... not just the immediate setting of each scene, but the overall world of the story, or at least the parts of it that are relevant.

4 - Incorporate Literary Devices - Juvenile writing tends to be lacking in the use of metaphor, simile, symbolism, irony, themes, and motifs. So, make sure to include those, but also take the time to make them relevant to your story.

5 - Include a Broad Range of Vocabulary - One common element of juvenile writing is a reliance on limited, simple vocabulary. Don't be afraid to use a thesaurus to find more interesting word choices--just be absolutely certain to crosscheck your choices with a dictionary to make sure they are the right choice. Online thesauruses in particular are bad about offering up bad suggestions. Also, make sure to learn and use special vocabulary that is relevant to your story, genre, or setting. For example, if your character is a retired police detective trying to solve a murder on his stalled cruise to Alaska, you need to make sure you know the proper investigative terminology, because he will definitely use it. And, by that same token, you'd want to make sure you know cruise ship lingo as well. And, part of this, too, is getting better at description and the inclusion of emotional and sensory detail.

6 - Use Varied Sentence Structure - This is a big one... juvenile writing tends to use repetitive sentence structure, such as simple sentences (she stood up, she went to the window, she waved at the man), lack of subordinate clauses (Tad Smith, who was a seasoned and retired investigator, had looked forward to this cruise his whole life...), repetitive starts (every sentence begins with a pronoun, for example), uniform length (all short sentences, for example.) So, make sure your sentences are varied. If you read them out loud, you don't want it to sound rhythmic, but more like a complex melody.

7 - Show, Don't Tell... Most of the Time - Telling definitely has its place, but most of the time you want to show rather than tell, meaning that instead of stating things simply and directly (the sun was shining) you want to paint a clear but indirect image (dappled sunlight shone through the trees.)

8 - Avoid Cliche Phrases - Human language is littered with everyday phrases like "to each their own" or "better late than never." Generally-speaking, you want to avoid these phrases in your story, especially in exposition. If you include them anywhere, they're best spoken as dialogue by a character who it makes sense would say something like that. Likewise, be careful of cliche genre or character-type phrases. For example, villains who say things like "we're not so different, you and I..." or "I finally have you right where I want you!" These overused phrases tend to make stories sound juvenile and unpolished.

9 - Avoid Cliche Tropes - Another type of cliche to avoid if you want more mature-sounding writing is cliches of various tropes. Tropes on their own are a good thing, but when tropes are used the same way over and over again in a genre or type of story, they become predictable. For example, the super gorgeous protagonist who everyone is in love with, but they view themselves as plain and not special. Or the broken/hopeless/addict mentor character. It's not that you can't use any cliche tropes at all, just make sure your story isn't riddled with them, and do what you can to put your own spin on the ones you do use.

10 - Read, Read, Read - And I can't stress this enough... the absolute best way to improve your writing style and take your writing from juvenile to polished is to make sure you're reading a lot of fiction, in a lot of genres, by a lot of authors. Audio books, short stories, and poetry count, too. The more you read, the more you begin to: understand plot and story structure, recognize well-developed characters, easily envision complex settings and worlds, learn vocabulary and literary devices, become attuned to varied sentence structure, and learn to recognize cliche phrases and tropes.

Happy writing!

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I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

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Sneak Peek

She knew how the protocol dictated and it only gave her three minutes at most. If she didn't remove all traces of her hacking into the victim's computer, they would label her a suspect. She was a cyber vigilante, not a murderer, thank you very much. Criminals are very sensitive about the crimes they commit, and the least you could do is to accuse her accurately.

She began severing each connection, leaving behind no trace, but before she could finish, Detective Alvarez zeroed his eyes on the hidden camera and pulled out a notepad from his jacket. Then, he strode across the Persian rug, and bent low until he was right in front of the camera. He unfolded the paper and held it up. On it was one message.

How long have you been watching, Oblivion?

The screen blacked out. All connections severed from the camera.

The most dystopian thing you could do 7 months into a genocide is complain that a genocide is still happening—and it’s even more disgusting when it’s specifically targeted at wanting people to tag Palestinian gofundmes so you can filter them out of your dash. You’re being extremely distasteful when you demand something like that. People are dying.

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GO AND WRITE!

MANIFESTING

EXHIBITION

Silver payals wrap around ankles

Jingling with every step of a dance

Every verse in a hymn rung in a temple’s door

One, two, three, four

Practicing the rhythm with suns on your feet

Larkstone bright, henna deep rich and tucked in a drawer

One, two, three, four, five, six

Lemon, turmeric, and curd with chickpea flour mixed

Apply until the sun drips from your skin

One, two, three, four

Cameras flash like a thousand suns

Scalding heat until your breath constricts

The stage is bigger than your parents’ bed

You look so cultural; I have to take a photo.

Exhale for six seconds again. 

autochthonous (adjective)

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Character Spotlight

Agent Vivien. Twenty-eight. For her, home is a place you cannot escape like the smoke in your lungs from a housefire your father started. You still cough up dollhouse plastic and holy basil from time to time and it smells like your mother's grave. She picks up after her baby brother's messes who is twenty-five. Her mother dies, but it's the aftermath that sets the implosion. A shark at her job, she keeps moving, she's got to, or she'll drown. She craves the distance and the compartmentalization her job gives, the quick escape from knowing the aftermath of her jobs. Never stick around for the aftermath.

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