Latest Posts by alienitz - Page 3

Me: this is great!!! I finally have time to write! I can make some progress!

Me:

all my characters must be dead by now

but this kind of support feels good 🥺✨

I wish all writers who haven’t been able to write in a long time bc of depression a very I love u and I promise u will write again

getting closer to my ‘gray day’ and i keep pretending i’m ok when really i’m this close to burst into tears :’)

(’gray day’: posted a year ago)

me taking forever to reply to both my crush and the toxic person i hate

Noooo I'm sorry I accidentally lied

The best day to talk to your crush is whenever you feel ready

It's April 1st y'all

The best day to talk to your crush tbh

Shoot your shot!!

You get a positive answer: congratulations, I'm happy for you :)

You get a negative answer: pretend it was a joke and it's all good, I'm sorry for you but no worries you'll be fine

It's April 1st y'all

The best day to talk to your crush tbh

Shoot your shot!!

You get a positive answer: congratulations, I'm happy for you :)

You get a negative answer: pretend it was a joke and it's all good, I'm sorry for you but no worries you'll be fine

I came out as trans 2 years ago and well, 10 days ago I realized I was aro so this is making me happy

I love this pixel heart, thank you for giving my day some positivity :)

Transgender Aromantic pixel heart for anon

The Gray Day

I decided that today would be a gray day. It’s not a white day because things are going wrong; but it’s not a black day because I found a way to get better. However, this implies that I hurt someone. I don’t want to, but I’ve been destroyed a little more every day for more than a year. I believe in Love, I really do. But many things went wrong. Maybe it wasn’t real Love and this might explain why it makes me feel this way; or maybe was I too young to be happy with all of this. Whatever the reason is, I decided that I wanted to stop. It’s getting too hard for me. Fortunately, I’m feeling better with myself than I used to, so I haven’t thought about self harm or suicide to end my pain. I think I have to let him go. He doesn’t want to, but we have to. I know myself, and if I stay, I will force myself to do things that hurt me, that make me unhappy, that disgust me, and a few others. I don’t want this to happen, I don’t want to fake smiles or feelings, or make him believe I’m happy with us. Truth is, I was happy in the beginning, when I thought it was forever. But now I’m thinking about the time I still had a choice. Because I feel trapped, I can’t make my own decisions. He tells me to go to bed early and he knows when I don’t, he calls me all the time even though he knows that phones that ring and vibrate are unbearable for me. He has ‘crisis’ when he gets mad and yells at me because I don’t help him. I can’t do anything without receiving lots of messages and calls from him. Together, we stopped cutting ourselves and we got better, but now he’s pulling me down with him while I’m trying to fly. I know that this sounds selfish and I guess I am, but I can’t do this anymore. I wanna be able to do whatever I want without having to justify myself, I want to spend entire days without hearing my phone, I want to meet new people and do what I want with them without having to justify myself, I want to be free. It’s been several hours now since I’ve put my phone on plane mode and I know he’s probably trying to call me, he’s sending me messages, telling me he’s crying and he’s gonna hurt himself. A few hours earlier, I had an idea. I’m gonna write a letter, since we’re all in quarantine, because that’s the only way I can tell him without using a phone. I will write that I can’t do it anymore, that it’s over, and that I need my independence back. I will gather all our things, all our memories, and give them back to him once the quarantine will be over. I’ll delete all our pictures, block him on every social media because I know he won’t leave me alone. And then I’ll tell my ‘best’ (only) friend what happened and we’ll never talk about this again. After all of this; I’ll be able to accept myself as I am, not as I ‘should’ be, and I’ll be there for people that need me, for the ones I lost contact with, and I know I’ve made enough efforts to be able to go talk to people I don’t know, for I’m feeling way stronger than I was. Tonight; I am writing thid on Tumblr but I’m not expecting any reader. I thought I’d just let my mind write this and then I’d post it. If by any chance, someone is reading this, I hope you’re doing okay, and that my text might be a bit useful (pretty sure it’s not tho). I wish you the best.

First try for my new art homework

I’m a loser

My little sister (4yo) just asked me “do you wanna be a boy?” and I just stood here like omg what should I tell her

But since it’s my stepmother’s daughter I didn’t answer cause I don’t wanna get in trouble

In the end she only told me she didn’t want me to have a beard because she doesn’t like it

Well a few days ago I accidentally told my mom I’m trans

Someone had drawn a basketball court on my table in biology class today

Also yesterday there was a pumpkin on my history table

Wth is going on in this school, students don’t have anything to draw on

Once in 6th grade I had to read a text in history class and when I saw “JC” I said “Jesus Christ or maybe Julius Caesar, I don’t know” and everyone stared at me and started laughing even the teacher

draco: you’re late

harry: you’re handsome

draco: you’re forgiven

Draco: Happy anniversary, my love

Harry: A year together and you’re all sappy, eh?

Draco: I still hate you, only I love you too now

Harry: You’re so weird

Draco: I’m a complex and interesting person

Harry: And a fucking git

Draco: A git you like fucking

some people are so tall and beautiful and here I sit, 5′4 and resembling a shrunken mountain troll

It’d be cool if there was something like a rock band in Hogwarts like a group of students that wanted to play music or something because they all look too serious honestly

James: Who ate my leftovers?!

Sirius: Who ate my brother’s ass?

James, blushing: ...Okay. *Leaves quickly*

sirius: please let me put eyeliner on you just this once, we can’t go to a punk show if you’re not wearing eyeliner

remus: alright, fine

sirius: *sees remus with eyeliner on*

sirius, choking: holy fuck, i think i might be gay

It’s honestly so stupid that Harry is in a relationship with Ginny like they’ve talked 2 times about shit wtf

But Draco could absolutly be Harry’s lover like he’s been annoying him for years so Harry could notice him and it’s clearly how a great Love story could start

When they force me to go see a therapist

Therapist: Do you feel different sometimes? I mean different from the others

Me: *stays silent as if I was thinking about an answer*

Me: Don't you think we're all different?

Therapist: 0.0

Therapist: Wtf

Me: Oh no I don't pass I don't look like a cis boy omg

A random guy: *starts to talk to me*

Random guy: Oh sorry young man I thought you were someone else

Me: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSS

Harry: Draco, are you a cigarette?

Draco: No…why?

Harry: Because I want to get you lit and stick your butt in my mouth

Draco: Why are you like this?

Brighter than ever

Harry: I once thought Draco used to be an equestrian

Ron: Why?

Harry: Because he rides my di-

Ron: Nevermind! Don’t finish that sentence, EVER!

Pls

Sirius: Nice hands, Moony.

Remus: Uh...thank you?

Sirius: I bet they'd look better wrapped around my-

James: BIBLE! WRAPPED AROUND THE BIBLE. PRAISE THE LORD, AMEN.

Character: What are you doing?

Me: Just thinking about what's gonna happen to you

Character: Tell me

Me: No you'll see later

Character: Fine

Character: *waits a long time*

Character: I DIDN'T WANT TO FALL IN LOVE DELETE THIS

Me: I like it

Character: I DON'T

Me: Ok so what do you want next?

Character: KILL ME, END MY SUFFERING

Me: I think it'll be nice if you have children

Character: DON'T-

Character: *has children*

Character:

Me: Perfect.

Character: Fuck you.

ron: listen mate i don’t think you understand, but this blonde bloke has daddy issue-

harry, to draco: call me daddy *winks*