Dick: Hey Jason. What If Santas Elves Were Just Dyslexics Who Sold Their Souls To The Wrong Person?

A bit of a pallet cleanser for everyone.

weirdly specific and unrelated asks to know someone well:

chipotle order?

thoughts on veganism?

a specific color that gives you the ick?

mythical creature you think/believe is real?

favorite form of potato?

do you use a watch?

what animal do you look forward to seeing when you visit an aquarium?

do you change into specific clothes for the house when you get home?

do you have a skincare routine (and how many steps is it)?

on a plane, do you ask for apple or orange juice?

anything from your childhood you’ve held on to?

brand of haircare/bodycare/skincare that you trust 100%?

first thing you’re doing in the purge?

do you think you’re dehydrated?

rank the methods of death: freezing, burning, drowning

thoughts on mint chocolate chip?

an anxious compulsion you do everyday?

your boba/tea order?

the veggie you dislike the most?

favorite disney princess movie?

a number that weirds you out?

do you have an emotional support water bottle?

do you wear jewelry?

which do you find yourself using, american or british english?

would you say you have good taste in music?

how’s your spice tolerance?

what’s your favorite or go-to outfit?

last meal on earth?

preferred pasta noodle?

ask me anything !

leave an ask for the person you reblog it from!

"two bodyguards drag me away" has been my fav way to finish insane sentences, its up there with "who said that", "can anyone hear me", "is this thing on" and "its so dark in here"

Heroes at Home

It took me forever to work on in short bursts while still injured, but sometimes and idea just sinks its teeth into you and won't let go. 🦁

Here’s to 2023, a year of as many little courageous kindnesses as possible. ♥️

Georgia O’Keeffe, in a letter to Russel Vernon Hunter, from Georgia O’Keeffe: Art and Letters

Art by René Magritte

kinder than man, athea davis

☠️ creaky-freak Follow

i get d/newlyturned can be useful but why are there vamps asking the stupidest questions like how to bite….. even humans know that u just open your mouth and close it on something… not that difficult.

⚰️ draculabitme Follow

I’m so tired of this new generation of vampires. Back when i was turned, if you didn’t know how to hunt, you starved. These fucking babybats with their bloodbags and willing victims are defanging the name of vampires.

🧛🏻 garlicker Follow

why are these vamps asking deaddit anyway, shouldn’t they be learning these things from their sire???

🦇 batty-betty Follow

hey, biting correctly can be tricky to master! and some vampires don’t have a relationship with their sire where they feel comfortable asking for advice. when i was turned, my sire was my former master and it took awhile to feel like i could talk to her freely. plus, most fledglings are abandoned by their sires these days. i think it’s great that these babybats have a place to figure these things out.

🧛🏻‍♂️ snacula Follow

op left out the full screamshot anyway

he’s having trouble sucking enough blood from the wound, which is something most fledglings struggle with tbh.

tip to all the babybats: if you feel you’re not getting enough blood you probably aren’t sucking hard enough. you gotta really work at it. it takes time to build up the muscles to drain someone within minutes. and if you really want to puncture an artery go right ahead, just prepare for things to get messy haha (and don’t expect your victim to live through it)

and here is a site made specifically for newly turned vampires, it’s got all you need to know as a fledgling

🪦 f34st-of-bl00d Follow

reblogging for that last bit, i struggled with sucking when i was a fledgling and i had no sire to tell me why.

another tip: bite the chest when starting out. you can move on to the neck once you’ve gotten a hang of that. and i wouldn’t recommend the wrist or thigh as a convenient bite

🧛‍♂️ fresh-blood Follow

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