I Will Always Love You But I Cannot Look At You

"Are you letting yourself be led by fear or by love?"

In a 2021 musical film called Tick Tick Boom, Michael asks his friend Jonathan this question. Two years later, in the early hours of the morning, I ask myself the same thing and the answer is always the same: fear.

I think that for a long time, I lived out of fear for my emotional well-being, my mental health, and my physical safety. I've come to realize that I am no longer in danger. I've come to realize that I cannot dwell on what I cannot control. I've come to realize that I have more power than I thought, but my answering isn't changing.

I thought that if I healed, then I would be fine. But I am not fine. I am directionless.

- @annetries-towrite

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patience is such a compelling dynamic in relationships sorryyy it’s the peak of romance to me

Character Traits

An interesting trick I learned from scrolling through my Instagram feed (instead of writing) is to focus on the extremes of your character - the two ends on a character’s personality spectrum.

Take a perfectionist, for example. This person strives to be perfect all of the time, therefore, they work extremely hard. However, this person is so obsessed with being perfect that they can come off as condescending or controlling.

A character’s personality traits also depend heavily on the viewpoint at which you’re looking. Take an abusive parent. When the parent is at work, all of their co-workers may see them as a caring, respectful, and friendly person. To their child, they’re seen as uncivilized and a monster.

I’m not saying you have to use the “extremes” concept on every character. In fact, assigning only negative traits helps the reader identify who the antagonist (or villain) may be. However, giving a character both positive and negative traits helps humanize the character.

If you have any questions regarding character traits, or feel as though I’ve missed something, feel free to let me know!

By nurture, I think I will always crawl back, begging, bleeding, and pleading for someone to tend to the wounds they didn't make. By nature, I believe I deserved someone to be there in the first place.

- @annetries-towrite

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I think that once you've hurt someone enough times, you don't deserve to come back into their lives, apologizing for your actions over and over again. At some point, it stops being them and it starts being about you. At some point, you owe it to them to stay gone.

- @annetries-towrite

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what does your writing process look like?

sometimes, sentences sit in my google docs for months before I decide to revise and post. other times, I just log on and write how I feel and post it immediately. basically, it's incredibly chaotic, but it works😂

Hey, you are not an embarrassment for not knowing how to do certain household chores/basic self-care. They do not come naturally to us. A lot of it takes practice! Maybe you had a neglectful guardian. Maybe you had one that was very coddling and never thought to teach you. Maybe you haven't lived in a place where these things were available to you or needed. Doesn't matter. It's okay to not know and far more common than you might realise.

That said, this website provides very simple instructions on how to do everyday tasks such as making your bed, using a washing machine, cooking different foods, washing dishes, taking a shower, etc. All you have to do is use the search bar to find the task you're struggling with, and it'll come up with what you need + other related how-to's:)

If you're having trouble navigating it, let me provide you with some examples:

How to clean dishes by hand

How to make your bed (with visual demonstrations of each step!)

How to fold clothes (with visual demonstrations of each step!)

How to take a shower & dry yourself off (also provides ways to shave beards, armpits, legs and genitals)

How to shave legs, armpits, beards, pubic areas, etc. (a more in-depth guide)

How to mop the floor

How to sweep the floor

How to swallow pills

How to make small talk

How to make eye contact in different situations (or how to avoid it while still looking natural)

It's also perfectly okay if these don't help or aren't appealing to you. Unfortunately, nothing helps everyone.

(uses the “make your character say something while not actually saying it” writing advice i saw on here once)

(character interactions are now 200% more fun to write)

holy shit what

Public service announcement.

Blue/purple lips and fingernails is a symptom of low oxygen in lighter skin tones.

In darker skin tones you're looking for grey or white lips and fingernails. Other places where this may be not evidence is the tongue and gums.

Figured since everyone gets taught what low oxygen looks like on lighter skin. Everyone should know what it looks like on dark skin too.

-fae

I'm afraid if I go too far, I'll circle back to your name. It will be then that I must confront the intensity underneath my anger. Until then, I shall sit still and watch the world move on without me.

- @annetries-towrite

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