It’s Shit :,))

It’s my bday. I’m now 19. Yay. Aging.

god LET ME KISS HER 😭

MINORS, AGELESS BLOGS AND MEN DNI

Wolfstar fanfic cause I’m bored, it will be up after I post this so, fair warning it made me cry writing it, and is now my beta reader’s 13th reason. It is angst, there is no happy ending, I would guess. I mean the end is slightly happy, but like in wolfstar, no happy ending. Pure pain, have fun!

How we feel about my invader zim bra I got, gays

Me when it’s time to make another 40+ yr old man a lesbian for the month

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Fear

A thing covered

In the thing called society.

We have created this

This vile

This villain

This deep seated feeling

We have created it

And then we gave it power.

We give it power over our lives

Afraid of everything.

Afraid that if we aren’t a certain way

We will get killed.

Afraid of what others think

Because that is what we are taught.

We are afraid of getting left

Because we are taught

That being left can only equal

Being worthless.

That being left

Is because you weren’t good enough.

You weren’t good enough for them.

You weren’t able to keep up.

You were too different.

You were too unique.

You were too much You.

So they left.

And with them left your worth.

Society tells us,

That without worth,

We are without being.

Without being able to put a price

There is nothing

And then it was all pointless.

Because even the most priceless of things

Is still marked with a price tag.

The world taught us to be open

And to be afraid of the closed off.

That they had to have done something

Something bad

Something terrible

If they had nothing to say.

That if you weren’t open

Then you weren’t worthy of trust.

We say things we don’t want to,

Because silence has become a crime,

Because our safety and comfort

Is at the bottom of the barrel.

When we speak up

Nobody listens

They say we are crazy,

Because that is what history says.

Because that society taught it.

We are taught

That without a partner

Are we really human?

Without love

Without attraction

Without sexual activity

Wouldn’t we be robots?

Wouldn’t you have to be an alien?

And then when we express the attraction we have,

We are told that it is wrong,

And are instilled a fear

Of speaking about who we love

Just in case the person we talk to

Has a fear

And has a weapon

Even if that weapon

Is a word.

We are taught

That fear isn’t real

And that if we have one

We are weak.

When in reality

We are the strong ones

Because we live every single day

Having to know

That the fear is there

And the object could be around at any time.

For me, it is the dark

Because something could be there

And I am most vulnerable

When I cannot see.

For a friend, it is heights

Because you cannot catch yourself

When pushed off of a building.

For another, it is people

Because of what they might say

Or what they might do

And they have to have hope

That someone doesn’t snap

And decide that it was their time.

Fear is not a weakness

It is a strength

That we have been taught

As a necessity.

Yearning hours where I just want a girlfriend but the hours turn into days and I still have yet to find a soul to fill the void in my heart who simple wants to love and be loved in return.

i forgot to post this last year so im scheduling it to post march 15th 2024 (it's march 17th 2023 rn)