“So, What If, Instead Of Thinking About Solving Your Whole Life, You Just Think About Adding Additional

Dear New Poly Partner,

Being with you, I feel flooded with butterflies, warm-and-fuzzies, and daydreams. At the same time, I appreciate the depth we’ve already created together in such a short period of time. I feel really grateful to have you in my life and I’m so excited that we’re exploring together. 

I know you’re new to poly and it can feel intimidating and scary. I want you to know a few things about me and my viewpoints on this as we move down this path together.

My established relationships are not a threat to you. They’re not something you have to compete with, be better than, or worry about. I’m happy to tell you anything you want to know about them. You’re not in the way, taking time away from someone else, or upsetting the balance.

Being poly doesn’t mean I date or sleep with just anyone. I’m picky and am not interested in adding someone who is mediocre into my physical or energetic space. You offer me something special that no one else does. I care about you and feel energized by our connection.

While I’ve had other relationships before, this is the first time I’m having our relationship, and that’s as new to me as it is to you. I don’t know what’s going to happen and can’t predict every breakdown that we may encounter along the way. 

What I DO know, is that I’m committed to establishing open communication and talking to you about how I’m feeling as we deepen together. I want for you to feel safe enough with me and our connection to do the same.

I don’t have an empty box that I want you to fit into, nor am I using you to fill holes in my life that other partners have left empty. My life is full of love, depth, richness, and I want to share it with you.

This feels exciting, fun, scary, sweet, intimidating, tender, beautiful, deep, and intriguing all at the same time.

I care about you and really looking forward to deepening, growing, learning, and sharing together.

xoxo

pretty much every relationship I've ever had

WORD OF THE DAY: 

decathect 

[dee-kuh-thekt]  verb

to withdraw one’s feelings of attachment from (a person, idea, or object), as in anticipation of a future loss: He decathected from her in order to cope with her impending death.

Source

I understand why people dislike leather and animal products. But leather is such a good resource? Like… My mom bought a sturdy leather coat in 1989. I’m in my 20’s and I now wear that coat. That’s a 30 year old coat? 30 years, two generations, one coat. Versus, like… A plastic one, that rips and gets thrown out, or releases bits into the ecosystem every time it’s washed, takes a billion years to decompose, lasts maybe a decade if you’re super duper careful, and uses oil products in it’s construction. Like, yeah leather is expensive and comes from a living animal, and I’m not saying that you should go out and buy fifty fur and leather products for the he’ll of it, but like… Maybe the compromise is worth it? One animal product, valued and respected and worn down for generations, versus like… Six plastic products that will never ever go away?

idk, I could be wrong.

One of the most amazing things I've seen

“Is This Healthy” is a comic that I made for an independent study in which I looked deeper into the idea of health, mental, physical, and emotional as it relates to myself.

This project was extremely personal and I thank any of you who take the time to read it

If you are an adult on the receiving end of sexual attention from a minor, the only appropriate response is a firm, non-negotiable “no.” Not an “I would, but the darn law…” not, “maybe when you’re eighteen,” a “no.” It is your job as the adult to be responsible, and to not abuse the power differential between you. What the minor wants is irrelevant to your obligations. The only appropriate response is “no.”

Sometimes people say terrible things when they’re scared. They don’t mean to, but they can’t help it. They lash out because if they can see that their words hurt someone else, it makes them feel as if they aren’t completely powerless.

Jonathan Maberry, Dust and Decay (via thequotejournals)

So very accurate