Proud Of My Captain.

Oh what a night.. By © Bob Astakhov

How to stop procrastinating on tasks you dread doing

After embarking on a journey of creating some new daily and weekly habits this month (and managing to succeed except for that week when I was sick), I’ve finally come to understand why I really dread doing certain things.

Simply, it’s just the fact that I hate starting anything. And I mean anything. Even things I find fun. I haven’t watched a new k-drama in months just because I don’t want to start one. And I love k-dramas.

So if you’re struggling to get things done, you likely have a similar problem. It’s just getting started that’s hard. Once I’m actually in the middle of doing something, it’s fine. So here are some tips that help me get started.

Tip #1: Do something similar but simpler.

In my case, the task I dread the most everyday is writing 500 words of the first draft of my novel. Once I’m writing though, I actually have fun. Yet for some reason I put it off everyday haha

But another daily habit I’ve been working on is reading some of a book everyday. Reading is similar to writing but it’s so much easier. I don’t have as much resistance to reading so it’s easy to start.

I either read fiction or a book on the craft of writing so once I read a chapter or so of this book, I find myself more amped up for writing.

Another thing I do sometimes is just think about the story. Without actually writing anything, I start thinking about the next scene and what might happen (I haven’t planned most of this novel so I’m just writing willy-nilly basically lol) and that also usually gets me in the mood to start writing that scene.

So for you maybe this could be:

When studying a foreign language, watch some videos/tv in that language then do your actual studying.

Homework: Do the tiniest and/or most enjoyable bit of homework first then your larger, harder stuff

Chores: Start small like just picking up stuff off the floor and then get into the actual mopping, dusting etc

But there’s an important thing to keep in mind when using this tip. You have to do the simple task and the dreaded task really close together, preferably one after the other. It’s all about momentum. If you do the small task then go do something else that’s unrelated, you lose the momentum. And the whole point of doing the small task in the first place is to gain momentum! Which brings me to the next tip.

Tip #2: Momentum, momentum, momentum

Once I start being productive I’ve noticed it’s so much easier to just keep going and knock off all my tasks.

It’s actually the reason why the pomodoro method just doesn’t work for me and I’ve tried it so many times. I’m not a “take breaks in the middle” kind of person because any break halts my momentum which makes it hard to get started again.

I’m definitely a “do all the things at once then take a break for the rest of the day” kind of person, so if you’re similar this tip will work for you.

After gaining some momentum by doing a similar but simple task, just do everything in one long chain.

In my case, in the mornings, I’ll go from reading a chapter of a Korean book to writing my Korean essay thing to exercising. Reading in Korean is obviously similar to writing in Korean. But exercising doesn’t have anything in common except the fact that it’s another task on my list.

Once I’m in the “productive mood” I like to milk it and do as much as I can then take a long break when I get too tired.

You can chain anything really. The trick is to just not think about it too much. If I paused and thought “hmm do I really want to exercise right now and what exercise should I do” etc, it breaks the momentum. I just see the next task I have to do and start doing it.

Tip #3: Make it more convenient to do the task.

Increasing the convenience of doing a task will lower the barrier to entry by making it feel like the task is easier to start.

A small example from my life is that I really hate washing my face in the evening. I know it’s weird. But anyway after dinner, I turn on the water heater (otherwise the water will be freezing cold) and wash the dishes.

Well guess what? I like washing my face with warm water too. So I always think, “well while I have the water heater on, I might as well go wash my face then turn it off.”

Already having the water heater on eliminates one extra step that I’d have to do to wash my face which makes it more convenient.

This also demonstrates another example of starting with the similar but simpler task, which for me is washing the dishes.

So just do whatever you can to make doing the thing you dread more convenient like:

Lay out everything you need on your desk/work space and keep it there until you complete the task.

Open every program you’ll need on your computer and have them open until you complete the task (in my case I always have Scrivener, which I use to write my novel, open)

Lay out your exercise clothes in advance or maybe even sleep in them if you exercise in the morning.

If you workout at home like me, you can always have your exercise mat on the floor or whatever equipment you use out.

Also for exercise, plan your workouts in advance. Like I said in the previous tip, deciding what workout to do breaks momentum. I usually follow along with YouTube videos so before I go to bed I open up the YouTube video I plan on doing in the morning and just hit play when it’s time.

Tip #4: When all else fails, promise yourself a reward.

If you have a little bit of self-control, this can be an effective method for you, assuming there’s something you want.

It can be as simple as I just want to lay in bed and watch YouTube videos, which is usually the reward I give myself haha

And there’s nothing as sweet to me as lazing about completely guilt-free because I did the task. Because the thing is, I can laze about without having done the task but there will always be that tinge of guilt, the ole “I really shouldn’t be doing this right now…,” which ruins everything.

Now that I’ve experienced guilt-free lazing about, I live for it.

And this doesn’t just apply to my personal life. At work, if I’m smart and effective, I can get all my lesson planning and prep done so that I have one or two hours left before the end of the work day which means sitting at my desk watching junk. Ah yes, the highlight of my work day.

Anyway, I hope maybe these tips will help you overcome the dreaded task(s) and enjoy yourself guilt-free!

I love you – I do – but I am afraid of making that love too important. Because you’re always going to leave me…We can’t deny it. You’re always going to leave.

David Levithan, Every Day (via thequotejournals)

The way she pounds that pretty pussy and then chokes her…

~PornForAll

great practice

Healthy Habits

“1. push yourself to get up before the rest of the world - start with 7am, then 6am, then 5:30am. go to the nearest hill with a big coat and a scarf and watch the sun rise. 2. push yourself to fall asleep earlier - start with 11pm, then 10pm, then 9pm. wake up in the morning feeling re-energized and comfortable. 3. erase processed food from your diet. start with no lollies, chips, biscuits, then erase pasta, rice, cereal, then bread. use the rule that if a child couldn’t identify what was in it, you don’t eat it. 4. get into the habit of cooking yourself a beautiful breakfast. fry tomatoes and mushrooms in real butter and garlic, fry an egg, slice up a fresh avocado and squirt way too much lemon on it. sit and eat it and do nothing else. 5. stretch. start by reaching for the sky as hard as you can, then trying to touch your toes. roll your head. stretch your fingers. stretch everything. 6. buy a 1L water bottle. start with pushing yourself to drink the whole thing in a day, then try drinking it twice. 7. buy a beautiful diary and a beautiful black pen. write down everything you do, including dinner dates, appointments, assignments, coffees, what you need to do that day. no detail is too small. 8. strip your bed of your sheets and empty your underwear draw into the washing machine. put a massive scoop of scented fabric softener in there and wash. make your bed in full. 9. organise your room. fold all your clothes (and bag what you don’t want), clean your mirror, your laptop, vacuum the floor. light a beautiful candle. 10. have a luxurious shower with your favourite music playing. wash your hair, scrub your body, brush your teeth. lather your whole body in moisturiser, get familiar with the part between your toes, your inner thighs, the back of your neck. 11. push yourself to go for a walk. take your headphones, go to the beach and walk. smile at strangers walking the other way and be surprised how many smile back. bring your dog and observe the dog’s behaviour. realise you can learn from your dog. 12. message old friends with personal jokes. reminisce. suggest a catch up soon, even if you don’t follow through. push yourself to follow through. 14. think long and hard about what interests you. crime? sex? boarding school? long-forgotten romance etiquette? find a book about it and read it. there is a book about literally everything. 15. become the person you would ideally fall in love with. let cars merge into your lane when driving. pay double for parking tickets and leave a second one in the machine. stick your tongue out at babies. compliment people on their cute clothes. challenge yourself to not ridicule anyone for a whole day. then two. then a week. walk with a straight posture. look people in the eye. ask people about their story. talk to acquaintances so they become friends. 16. lie in the sunshine. daydream about the life you would lead if failure wasn’t a thing. open your eyes. take small steps to make it happen for you.”

Sixteen Small Steps to Happiness (via wethinkwedream)

pretty much every relationship I've ever had

WORD OF THE DAY: 

decathect 

[dee-kuh-thekt]  verb

to withdraw one’s feelings of attachment from (a person, idea, or object), as in anticipation of a future loss: He decathected from her in order to cope with her impending death.

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