Being Called "cringe" By Another Tumblr User Is Just So..............my Sibling In Christ U Are Also

You ever been in a state where you physically have no energy, but you're bored and socially understimulated so you kind of wish you could just invite people to come over like this:

Reporter: so, Mr. Stark, tell us, what are going to do this Pride month?

Tony: SI has planned several events actually and for our LGBT+ employees we—

Reporter: I’m sure that’s very interesting, but what about your personal involvement? Sure there’s something you could do from the height of your privilege—

Tony: Oh, me, personally? I’m planning to suck a lot of dick.

The Flirt

WinterIron, T, 1.1k - Crack, Humor, established relationship, Tony the Flirt, Bucky is amused, Avengers family shenanigans

A couple folks said they’d be interested in seeing the actual process of me writing an entire fic around one line of dialogue, and that seemed like a fun challenge, so I wrote this fic in a day so I could write THAT.

Just a silly fun little thing please enjoy (and if you want you can find the behind-the-scenes HERE!)

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“This doesn’t bother you at all?”

“What doesn’t?” Bucky asks, not looking up from his book.

“This,” Scott says again, unhelpfully. The word is accompanied by the entire couch jolting slightly as he flails his arms at the TV, and Bucky finally looks up.

He hasn’t been paying attention while the rest of the room flips through channels and argues about what to watch, but it looks like they’ve temporarily paused on coverage of the SI press event going on right now. Bucky gets a little distracted just watching Tony smile and charm everyone on his way out of the venue, and when he spots Happy waiting nearby he starts calculating how long it’ll take Tony to get back to the tower, but when Scott makes an impatient sound Bucky tears his eyes away from the TV.

“That Tony has to do these things?” Bucky asks in confusion, “I mean, a little, but only because it leaves me stuck hanging out with you assholes.” He leans back to dodge the throw pillow Sam hurls at him from the other end of the couch and then points out, “You’ve been arguing with Clint about The Voice for an hour, that’s longer than the show.”

“I think he means Tony flirting with all the reporters and their camera men,” Natasha chimes in from where she’s curled up in the armchair.

“That is what I mean,” Scott confirms, most of his attention on grabbing one of the spare pillows as ammo just in case and hey look at that, he’s learning.

“Why would that bother me,” Bucky says dismissively, “he’s just flirtin’ his way out like he always does so he can get home quicker. Plus, Tony flirts with everything. Literally, I once saw him run into a chair and then flirt with it.”

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My favorite detail about Jurassic Park is that it has a baked-in justification for any and all retcons it might need to make due to paleontology advancing forwards.

Because there is not a single dinosaur that has ever appeared in Jurassic Park.

Not one. Not in the books. Not in the movies. Not ever.

"Now what John Hammond and InGen did at Jurassic Park was to create genetically engineered theme park monsters." ~Alan Grant

Grant says that in a moment of cynicism. It's part of his arc for the film. But it's not inaccurate. What Jurassic Park has, what it's always had since the very first novel, are "Mostly Dinosaurs".

"And since the DNA is so old, it's full of holes! Now, that's where our geneticists take over!" ~Mr. DNA

It's impossible to recover a fully intact gene sequence from an ancient amber mosquito. Cloning a pure dinosaur would have been completely impossible, and so the park filled in the gene sequence with whatever works. Frog. Lizard. Bird. Whatever they need to get the result they are trying to get.

Every single dinosaur is a chimeric beast made up of mostly dinosaur and a bunch of other stuff that some scientists thought would achieve the appropriate dinosaur-like result.

"Nothing in Jurassic World is natural! We have always filled gaps in the genome with the DNA of other animals. And if the genetic code was pure, many of them would look quite different." ~Dr. Henry Wu

Which, from a writing perspective, is fucking genius. Because now you have a preset excuse for each and every plot hole your movie has.

Like. Why don't the raptors have feathers? Because of the chimera DNA.

Why do dilophosaurs spit venom? Because of the chimera DNA.

Why do T-Rexes have movement based vision? Oh, they don't. But Rexy does. Because of her chimera DNA.

Why is the Spinosaurus so fucking big? Because of the chimera DNA.

Why are the velociraptors mislabeled? Because Hammond's a dipshit.

Like. I've always marveled at the way Jurassic Park started out by giving itself a blanket excuse to be wrong about every single thing it ever said about the central attraction of its franchise. It's honestly beautiful, and allows the series a degree of immortality well into the era where we know better about its animals.

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