Bluesapphirevirgo22 - E.Z@22

“I don’t feel particularly proud of myself. But when I walk alone in the woods or lie in the meadows, all is well.”

— Franz Kafka, Letters to Friends, Family, and Editors

You don’t ever have to feel guilty about removing toxic people from your life.

It doesn’t matter whether someone is a relative, romantic interest, employer, childhood friend, or a new acquaintance -

you don’t have to make room for people who cause you pain or make you feel small.

It’s one thing if a person owns up to their behaviour and makes an effort to change. But

if a person disregards your feelings, ignores your boundaries, and “continues” to treat you in a harmful way, they need to go.

No one will ever fully be able to understand the internal battles you had to endure just to heal, just to grow, just to make it here today. Be proud of the way you fought to save yourself. Be proud of the way you survived.

Bianca Sparacino

“Never let the memories of the way things were, blind you from seeing the reality of the way things are.”

— Unknown

“biggest lesson: if you feel drained around them they’re not for you”

— Andrew Zaffina

“If it gets awkward, let it be awkward. That awkwardness is something they created. You don’t owe anyone a performance of being okay when you are not feeling okay so that they can feel better about themselves.”

— Jennifer Peepas

“It’s not just other people we need to forgive. We also need to forgive ourselves. For all the things we didn’t do. All the things we should have done.”

— Mitch Albom

Speak Softly, Carry A Large Piece of Lead

Post-traumatic-stress-disorder united with passive-aggressiveness when your mother bought lead paint to try to poison the family. #dysfuncfamproblems

Comparing oppression can sometimes give you insight as to what other groups of people go through. It teaches you what you have in common with people seemingly different than you are, and teaches you how you are different and how you can ally yourself better with other peoples.

However, if your goal is to prove you suffer the most between you and another person, you'll likely find that there is no conversation, just an endless barrage of back-and-forth to prove which of you deserves to be listened to.

The reality is that you don't have to be in the most pain in order to be listened to. So often, we are inundated with this idea that the person suffering the most is the only one who ought to be listened to, and it sends the message of "holy shit, I guess I don't matter. I guess I deserve to suffer if others are going through worse," and that's just unreasonable and unfair. Who has it worse is entirely contextual and changing, and sometimes it is subjective - as in, something that is earth-breaking for you is an average tuesday evening for the guy next to you.

Kill the cop in your head that says your voice will only matter if you prove yourself. Listen to other marginalized people and know it isn't a competition to see who can prove themselves most worthy of tine and energy. Our resources can (and should) be multifaceted and able to help a variety of peoples.