I used to think scientists were mortal gods; that I should never be clever enough to be one of them. Even now I am astounded every day by the minds that solved some of nature’s most incredible problems. Maybe that’s why I took no interest in science until I was 14.
Or maybe it was because of all I have been told over the years. I was told I was hopeless with maths - my secondary school maths teacher admitted that I was only in the top set because my confidence was already on the floor and would not allow them to move me down.
I was told that if I needed to be medicated for depression and anxiety, I would have no hope in the “real world”.
I was told that given my socioeconomic status (my single-parent family is among the poorest 10% in the U.K. based on income) and postcode, all the predictions pointed to my failing school. I don’t suppose the truancy due to constant bullying helped my case. If I didn’t even have a desk to work at, how could I ever expect pass any of my exams? (Look carefully at the picture and you’ll see carpet. It’s 23:56 on a Sunday and I am reunited with the only study space I have in my family home - the top of the stairs!)
And yet here I am, despite all the odds. I did not fail in school: I was top in my year, twice. I am striving for a first in my chemistry degree at a Russell Group university. I taught myself an A level in maths and got a top grade. I am now so totally in love with my degree and with learning that it hurts.
I did all that from the top of the stairs.
[Sorry for the rambles, and I hope that the wall of text doesn’t look like bragging. It’s just that lately, I’ve been so overwhelmed with how far I have yet to go, and I’ve only just realised how far I’ve come.]
First day back at sixth form and first day of a new productivity challenge! I will honestly try to suck less at posting every day this time hehe
Because I have 4 free hours on a Monday before my first out of two lessons at 2pm, I got a lot done. I started out with some maths, but then my computer logged me off my digital books and it wouldn’t load again, so I ended up writing up some biology notes and then doing some chemistry - that’s what you can see here :)
Although I am full of cold, it has been a good day all round! I found out I got an A* in my bio mock when I thought I actually flunked that test so hard.
My eyes snapped open at 7:30am so I figured I’d have a wash, stretch out my aching muscles and do some maths. After this I’ll go and grab some breakfast :)
It’s finally half term so the pressure is momentarily off and I can catch up on all my outstanding tasks.
I feel like I’ve achieved a lot in the past couple of hours I’ve been up!
Have an amazing day!
remind yourself that you are a person. not an object. not a thing. not an it. it doesn’t matter who threw you away or let you down. it doesn’t matter how you were treated in the past. you are worthy and capable of achieving anything.
5/3/19
Photosynthesis is so interesting! I still can’t believe that lowly plants and even cyanobacteria harness the energy of the humble electron to power this stuff. It’s so intricate
Edit: this app is called Notability for anyone wondering!
This is why I love chemistry. It’s messy yet highly predictable, and all molecules are intrinsically related to one another - even if it’s hard to get from one to the other in a single step.
I mentioned nucleophilic acyl substitution on my personal statement, and I’m just reminding myself of it - just in case Cambridge decide to grill me on it. In fact, as much as I HATE my personal statement, I’m going through it all. But my grey mildliner is healing my heart :)
I got an A* in French and an A in everything else... 4 marks off in German and I am beyond annoyed but I am so happy with my results, even though they weren’t the 5A*s I was predicted. Nobody in my year group at school got more than 1 A* so it was tough
Congratulations to all 2019 candidates - we did it!
So I have the flu and am sofa-bound but not even an uncomfortable illness can keep me away from Les Liaisons Dangereuses. It’s all written in letter form so I can read small chunks at a time.
So if you’re not familiar: this is an 18th century scandal among the Parisian aristocracy. The two main characters basically plot to exploit a young, newly-engaged, fresh-out-a-convent virgin girl and her fiancé to bring shame upon their names all because said fiancé rejected the salty antagonist. That is MAJORLY oversimplified but the gossip in here is very juicy haha
Have a great weekend!
It’s a low-key kind of day
Induction day 2 :)
I love quiet mornings that just go your way. I also love staying dry... yesterday I got soaked to the extent of having actual puddles in my still-sodden boots and I sat through three hours of talks wet through and cold haha
Gotta love that NMR!
Also can we appreciate those perfect hexagons because it took ages to draw those ahaha
Have a great Sunday!
Lauren, 22 - England - chemistry PhD student - studyblr - English, French (fluent), German (B2) - original and reblogged content - nice to meet you!
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