Adam: *speaks* Lawrence: 🙄🤦‍♂️

That one was too edgy for the blr my bad

✷ ✷ ✷

[ID: Digital illustration of a nude trans masculine person, cropped from thigh to shoulder. They are leaning back, holding a small dagger pointing between their legs. They have red top surgery scars, and a hairy chest and stomach. Two pale silhouettes of hands reach around the figure, as if stroking their belly and thigh. The figures are surrounded by a border of leaves and red flowers, with a star in the center overhead. There is an 8 pointed star covering the figures groin. The piece is done in a minimal color palette of black, red, and warm beiges and yellows. /. End ID]

i'm miserable but everything also feels beautiful

just finished watching honey boy and what the fuck. all i did was cry for the last 30 minutes of that movie. i don’t think i’ve ever watched a movie that horrifically, yet beautifully relatable.

i feel so gross. so rotten, i almost feel dead in a way. it feels as though i’m not living, merely drifting through my existence. i haven’t cleaned my room in weeks, i haven’t done any of my assignments, i haven’t been reading, i haven’t been writing, i just haven’t been able to do anything for weeks now. i’ve been getting angry with my friends and the people i love the most, and it’s never justified so i swallow it. but i feel so cruel for being irritated by those i hold so close. i am so scared. i am so, so scared. i should be better, and i am in some areas, but overall things haven’t improved much for me internally. i don’t know. i just feel so separated from everything and everyone.

noah jupe as otis lort in honey boy (2019) dir. alma har’el

“We never believe we’re beautiful, no matter how many times we hear it. We never believe it until someone says it in the right way.”

— Francine Prose

anyway no one fucks with gymnopédie no. 1 like i do

Maybe I do need to chill out