Secretary (2002) // Hey Jupiter By Tori Amos

can we PLEASE talk about how taylor swift really built an entire album around a car metaphor for a toxic relationship. like. she feels like this luxury car he crashed years ago!expensive, rare, irreplaceable… but she still wants him. so what does she do?? she tells him to go ahead, buy the car he wants. but here’s the thingggg the car won’t even start unless he touches her again.

and the wild part?? it works. he gets the car. so she lets go of her past and jumps in with him, ready to ride or die. they’re barely at the starting line before they’re breaking every rule, flooring it, crashing through fences like manic teenagers in love.

but then?? he starts throwing spikes on the road. like metaphorical sabotage. and she sees it, she knows it’s dangerous, but she doesn’t care because the ride is just so intoxicating. she’s addicted to the chaos and danger.

But of course. OF COURSE. he crashes it. again. AT HER OWN PARTY and he just drives away. To leave her stranded and safe, but right back at the start.

and the worst part??? she realizes he never even bought the car. it was a RENTAL. just like she was to him.

I love like a dog. Like yes, I’d love to listen to you talk about your passions. I will sit there with big attentive eyes and wagging my tail while we unpack everything you’ve ever done and will ever do. I want nothing more than to hold your face and breath you in for a while

Every sky was your own kind of blue.

Fuck nonchalantism, I need obsession, I need yearning, I need someone who keeps every little detail about me and remembers every thing I say or do.

I'm "looking" for a boyfriend in the sense that I'm waiting for one to fall into my lap by divine intervention.

sometimes remembering things just absolutely kills me

Sylvia Plath, from a letter featured in The Letters of Sylvia Plath Vol. 1: 1940-1956

I wait patiently, he's gonna notice me. You are the one I have been waiting for. I've waited my whole life. I've been sleeping so long in a twenty year dark night, and now I see daylight. He better lock it down or I won't stick around 'cause good ones never wait. If this is the long haul, how'd we get here so soon? I wait by the door like I'm just a kid. Were you waiting at our old spot? Now I'm waiting by the phone. Like waiting for a bus that never shows, you just start walking on. Now I just sit in the dark and wonder if it's time. Should've known it was a matter of time. I died on the altar waiting for the proof. Still alive, killing time at the cemetery. I just sit here and wait, grieving for the living. I won't confess that I waited, but I let the lamp burn. The woman who sits by the window has turned out the light. Even statues crumble if they're made to wait.