MiG

I received the following instructions to follow:

1. Dress embarrassingly in a rubber suit

2. Take pictures and masturbate

3. Upload them to the Tumblr!

Potty Training

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You should have to get recertified in potty training every 2 years to keep up with advancements in the field

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Women pretty much only want to date a guy who is potty trained

Always talking about getting coffee like it's nothing?

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I went through potty training almost 30 years ago. You really expect me to remember any of that?

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Normal underwear is the black belt of potty training

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Some people claim to be potty trained. But I don’t think it’s something that you can ever truly fully attain. I believe it’s an ongoing process, a endless struggle for perfection. A lifelong journey.

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I studied potty training under Bob and Sara Feldman in the 90's, but I dropped out when I realized they just taught the typical practices. Seemed like they didn't really have anything interesting or innovative to say in the space

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I dropped out of formal potty training to focus on more hands-on pooping

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My buddy was potty trained by his parents. So I asked if his parents would be down to teach me, and he said no!!!

Wow… Their techniques must be a closely guarded family secret.

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I’m living proof that you can get potty trained or lose your virginity in any order. Probably to be honest - I'm getting pretty close I think. I’ve got some irons in the fire for both

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Public restrooms don’t mean anything as a service unless they also offer public potty training lessons. You expect me to just know what to do in there?

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Diapers are so expensive because capitalism seeks to punish those who aren’t potty trained

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Date: I’m a sapiosexual. I’m sexually attracted to intelligence

Me: I tighten my collar and lean in oh yeah, is that so? Well, I actually just so happen to be potty trained. That’s right… these are big boy pants 😏👖

Date: waiter, check please

Me: Ope 😳 might have spoke too soon. I think I just went potty

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When I drink a coffee and then leave the house too soon, that's a choreographed potty dance

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When a child is doing the potty dance, it's like. Cope much?

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I always take some molly with my laxatives. I'm trying to get lost in the potty dance

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Ja stimmt genauso! Wenn besuch kommt! Später meine Mutter sagt: Bitte du ausziehen aber bleibt gewickelte Gummihose. Besucherleute staunen, lachen was du gewickelte Gummihose sagt schön und hübsche Gummihose. Passt sehr gut! Aber ich schäme später langsam verwöhnen und jetzt harmlos (nicht schämen)!

Mikey’s Guide to Unpotty Training

My Guide to Unpotty Training

Today I want to share the tricks and tips I used to unpotty train myself. Keep in mind that some things will being to work almost immediately (3-4 days), while others will take weeks, months or even years.

So if you are ready to be a diaper wearing little boy like me, here’s how to start.

1) Make the commitment. From here onwards you will only wear diapers. When I made this decision myself years ago I opened my dresser drawer and took out all of cartoon briefs and tightie whities (I never did wear “big boy” underwear). I then took my scissors and cut up my underoes so all I was left with was a pile of cotton rags. I quickly got myself padded up before I could change my mind, put on some pants and took my destroyed underwear to the trash, telling myself that I will NEVER wear underwear again.

2. From here onwards you can only wear diapers at all times. Regardless of where you are or what the occasion, unpotty training requires you to wear diapers at all times, 24 hours a day and 7 days a week. The moment you put on that big boy underwear and use that potty all that training you did will be destroyed. It takes a great degree of effort to convince your body that it is okay to just let go whenever and wherever. Potty training and all those years of using the potty have created a very strong learned behaviour.

3). Drink lots of water and juice throughout the day, this will keep you bladder full and make it much easier to practice uncontrolled wetting. It is also important to drink two bottles of juice or water within one hour of bedtime. This will help ensure you have to wet throughout the night.

4) Now for the unpotty training. Wet as soon as you feel it, DO NOT hold it. You want to train you body to just “release” on its on. I repeat NEVER HOLD IT. By holding it you are strengthening the bladder, rather then weakening it. It’s a muscle that needs training, so ensure you are constantly training it to relax. It is not initially possible to “ignore” the conscious awareness of needing to wet, but by telling yourself to relax and “let it happen” you will find your subconscious, the part that actually keep your from wetting yourself and controls the autonomous behaviour responses, will begin to accept and adopt the new patterns and responses until you do just void unconsciously. A few days to a week of unconscious natural voiding and you will be wetting and messing just like a little baby. Continue rewarding yourself mentally for being such a good baby, and wetting and messing yourself naturally and easily, and you will never feel ashamed or humiliated or embarrassed about what you now can do. Unpotty training is a combination of both physical and mental training.

5) Night-time wetting will take FOREVER. So have patience. Go to bed every night with a full bladder. Falling asleep with a bottle or sippy cup of water works great. Since you went to bed with a full bladder you will likely wake up and at some point and need to pee. Try to picture yourself remaining asleep as you wet, and “pretend” you are still sleeping. After you wet your diaper, relax again, and picture this happening while you sleep soundly, contentedly, and happily. Soon this is exactly how it will happen. It may take a few months [my experience] for you to sleep soundly through the night, and to wet naturally in your sleep. You may find yourself waking a while after you have wet, or just as you are wetting, but ignore it, and keep your eyes closed and fall back asleep. Remind yourself how wonderful it feels and fall asleep sucking your pacifier and hugging your teddy bear.

6) Remember what you are doing is potty training in reverse, so have patience. It took time to become potty trained in the first place and more important it is something you have been doing for decades, so it will take patience and time to unpotty train. Continue to reward and reinforce the “good, nice” sensations of wetting (and messing) and you will soon teach your body that it is okay to be a diaper boy.

And this here is how I became diaper dependent. But I have some bad news. Potty training is like learning to ride a bicycle, it’s something you never forget. In your subconscious you will still have that “potty training”, but this is a way to override that training and enjoying being in diapers 24/7. If you want something that is 100% effective surgery or a catheter is the only way to go. But for this little boy it’s 100% natural unpotty training for now.

Tedebjønen fikk bleie han med

mig som bebis

Mommy's 25 Diaper Rules

1) Baby is now 2 years old from here on.

2) Diapers are to be worn anytime a baby would normally have a diaper on until mommy decides otherwise. Diapers will be used for everything restroom related at home and in public.

2a) If baby consistantly holds the need to wet or mess while in public until returning home it might become a requirement that baby either takes laxatives each morning or an enema before going out to promote becoming comfortable using his diapers as needed and to become accustomed to the wet and/or messy feeling while out and about.

3) You are not allowed to remove or adjust your diaper for any reason.

4) Only mommy or an approved babysitter can change your diaper. Regular checks will be performed anytime and anywhere. Mommy will try to be discrete if possible, but checks will be performed regularly and you must allow for your diaper to be inspected immediately when requested to do so. Diaper checks and changes are performed at mommy's convenience and they cannot be prevented by baby for any reason.

5) When baby messes his diaper at home it is required that a squatting position be maintained as to serve an a visable non-verbal warning to mommy or babysitter that a diaper change will be needed soon.

6) You absolutely cannot enter a restroom without mommy being with you.

7) Using a potty is now forbidden until otherwise stated.

8) Baby is forbidden from touching any private parts underneath or through a diaper.

9) You are now mommy's little baby and any sexual contact with mommy is not alloud while wearing your diapers.

10) Baby may only wear a shirt and diaper while at home in order to allow for mommy to easily see when a change is needed. Anything covering your diaper is forbidden unless permission is given by mommy.

Note: No covering the diaper at home is one of the most important rules in making diapers a longterm or even permanent addition to your littles life. Over time they will become accustomed to seeing themselves in a diaper and not thinking about it. Your little will start to become fine with dressing for comfort and not to hide anything. After several weeks they will start to be fine with dressing more comfortable in public and may eventually not even try to hide their diaper anymore since it's not even a second thought to them.

10a) In public jeans or sweatpants will usually be alloud. Pants will adequately cover the baby's diaper. However, jeans and sweatpants worn out will not be so big that the diaper buldge, swelling from usage and diaper outlines are not visable preventing easy checks.

10b) Gym and work out clothing will generally be a little tighter fitting than jeans and sweatpants.

10c) When having to attend class or work a onesie will be permitted wear as to assist in holding any wet or messy diaper sags in place until baby can return home and can be appropriately changed by an approved adult.

10d) If mommy or an approved babysitter places your pacifier/binky in your mouth at anytime it must remain in place until removed by the caregiver. You may not talk or babble during pacifier time.

11) While at home any drinks will be given in a bottle or sippy cup with a lid. Absolutely no glass cups or anything without a lid can be used by baby.

12) 3 days a week will consist of only baby food being offered. Usually this will be Monday, Wednesday and Saturday.

13) Baby will not use adult language or big words for any reason. Only a babyish babble, baby appropriate sign language, non-verbal signals, crying or pointing with the occasional small/age appropriate word can be used when trying to communicate all wants and needs with mommy or a supervising adult.

14) Mommy will pick out your outfits anytime it is necessary to go out in public and will assist you in getting dressed. Selected outfits must be worn without complaints.

15) All hair must be removed from the diapered area and must be maintained smooth.

16) A diaper must be immediately put back on as soon as bathtime is finished. Mommy will supervise each bath time for baby's safety.

17) You will be respectful to all adults and do as you are told.

18) You cannot hide, lie or be ashamed of your diapers since they are necessary- be proud. If asked if you are wearing a diaper by any adult you must respond correctly.

19) Baby cannot be left at home alone. An adult such as a babysitter will always be present if mommy is not available.

20) When crossing any street baby must hold mommy's or babysitters hand.

21) Big boy underwear must be put in storage until further notice and diapers will be stored in their place. Mommy will select any color or style of diapers she wishes and will keep a home supply maintained.

22) Bedtime is 10:30pm sharp, unless stated otherwise.

23) Mommy's or a supervising adults rules will be followed at all times.

24) Failure to follow the required rules will result in a punishment ranging from extra time between diaper changes, an enema or up to an indefinite amount of time wearing diapers 24/7 being required.

25) Mommy or any supervising adult/babysitter reserves the right to add, change or remove any rule at anytime as they desire.

Photo source: ABdreams

Caught! The gimp has been captured but the very poor attempt at escaping suggests it rather likes it. Captured to ensure it can’t escape and is ready for the next time it’s needed!

Heute Nachmittag kam ein Paket an. Meine Freundin zu mir: Mach es auf, es ist für dich. Als ich es geöffnet hatte, war ich zu erst etwas schockiert. Meine Gedanken waren, hoffentlich bekomme ich diese Dinger nie angezogen, da ich die von Bekannten DL's schon kenne und gleichzeitig, wann steckt sie mich da rein. 😱 Sie meinte nur, freu dich nicht zu früh, ein zweites Paket für dich ist noch Unterwegs, das wird ein schönes Weihnachten werden. Das wäre dann alles für mich, wenn ich am Wochenende mal wieder bockig bin oder sie einfach mal wieder eine Stunde ihre Ruhe haben möchte. Einen gewindelten Freund kann man halt nicht bei allen Sachen gebrauchen. 😅 Man muss dazu wirklich wissen, mein Schatz macht die Wäsche, Putzt das Haus, füttert die Hunde und geht Gassi (gut, ich auch), usw. 🙈