What Would Buzzfeed Unsolved Look Like In The Dcu?

Never related to something so hard...

It's taunting me. Oh but don't you remember? You already left a kudos! :)

Like it's actually my concerned friend and not something that plagues my mind. That I can only contribute 1 measly kudos to the fic I've just read.

The absolute art that's been made public at just the right time for me to consume and mull over and over inside my head for hours and hours on end.

Yeah, I can only give this masterpiece, 1 kudos when it deserves so so SO MUCH MORE?!?!

SACRILEGE!!!!!!!!

Then again.....

When all our singular kudos come together. It resembles a fraction of what we as individuals are trying to tell the author(s).

That, we love your work and hope to see more of what your little brain has cooked up again in the future. :)

So I guess I can't be too angered after all

the :) AO3 gives you after telling you you’ve already left kudos on a particular fic is my archenemy because what do you mean :) ? what do you mean I’ve already left kudos here? have you read my favorite author’s work? look me in the eyes and tell me one kudos is enough. I’d give them a thousand kudos and my kidney plus my firstborn. what do you mean I can only give them one kudos??????

Dude, your pfp is absolutely adorable

Awe thanks! I got it off Pinterest lol :D <3333

Die Katze

I'd dis u???

I think? (Am I too late?)

So… I may or may not have written an entire Conlang based on a single joke in Minecraft Parkour Civilization 2. That would be ridiculous. Aha. Hahahaha. Ha.

*cough*

A Quick Guide to Writing in Parkour

Flourish List.

You add these in front of blocks to change their meaning. There’s a key at the bottom containing the Parkour alphabet which demonstrates how the space, 180°, 360°, and 720° Flourishes are used to refer to specific English-Letter analogs.

_ = Space

C = 180° Flourish = 5 spaces

O = 360° Flourish = 10 spaces

8 = 720° Flourish = 20 spaces

? = Reverse = Reverses input

^ = Vertical Jump = Raises Intensity

v = Drop = Lowers Intensity

Block List.

These are the building blocks (lmfao) of the language and are what would be counted as an “input” or “letter”. Also included are short legends under each block describing what each flourish does to each block!

(Note! _,C,O, and 8 cannot be applied to any block other than [ ] and H)

[ ] = Block = Grammatical Value

(?[ ] = Capitalized)

(^[ ] = Impassioned)

(v[ ] = Depressed)

H = Fence = Numerical Value

(?H = Negative)

(^H = Exponential)

(vH = Square Root)

u = Pot = Period

(?u = Comma)

(^u = Hyphen/Equality)

(vu = Parentheses)

I = Pane = Question

(?I = Exclamation)

(^I = Command)

(vI = Sarcasm)

% = Brewing Stand = Addition

(?% = Subtraction)

(^% = Multiplication)

(v% = Division)

Alphabet

a = [ ]

b = _[ ]

c = __[ ]

ch = ___[ ]

d = ____[ ]

e = C[ ]

f = _C[ ]

g = __C[ ]

h = ___C[ ]

i = ____C[ ]

j = O[ ]

l = _O[ ]

m = __O[ ]

n = ___O[ ]

o = ____O[ ]

p = OC[ ]

r = _OC[ ]

s = __OC[ ]

sh = ___OC[ ]

t = ____OC[ ]

th = 8[ ]

u = _8[ ]

v = __8[ ]

w = __8[ ]

x = ___8[ ]

y = ____8[ ]

Numbers

0 = H

1 = _H

2 = __H

3 = ___H

4 = ____H

5 = CH

6 = _CH

7 = __CH

8 = ___CH

9 = ____CH

Now that you have all the tools, let’s put it all together~!

————————————

?8[ ]____C[ ]__OC[ ] ____C[ ]__OC[ ] OC[ ][ ]_OC[ ]__[ ]____O[ ]_8[ ]_OC[ ]?I

____CHH% _HH ^u _HHH

?C[ ][ ]____OC[ ] 8[ ]C[ ] _OC[ ]____C[ ]___[ ]^I

————————————

Big thanks to my friend PrismaticKoi for giving me the idea and helping me figure this all out! Working with her made this process super fun!!!

Enjoy Parkour-!!! I’ll be coding an English<—>Parkour translator at some point, so stick around to find that!!

All of you need to go watch Minecraft Parkour Civilization though. It’s seriously fantastic.

Jim Pickens lore in point-form!

(Aka the CMK sims 4 series that ran from 2016-2022)

Recently I’ve noticed that newer CMK viewers don’t know the whole Jim Pickens universe lore so I’m going to explain it in the simplest way I can so they can know too :)

The story begins with Urp John. He moves into an apartment and has 6 kids with multiple women.

Jim Pickens moves in across from him and tries to get Urp to move in with him by attempting to kill off a household member.

Focus shifts to Jim.

Jim moves the family to the Sandtrap Flats, the first house in the series to feature a dungeon (called ‘chambers’ at this time).

To generate profit, he locks the family in the chambers and forces them to paint so Jim can later sell whatever they made. The only household members not in the chambers are the kids (Tim, Beejey and Urp’s kids). This is where the iconic Jim Pickens portrait comes from.

The cult unofficially forms. As members start to die, Jim begins taking an interest in the Grim Reaper.

Jim finds the Book of Chaos, which allowed him to kill people with magical abilities. He uses this to kill off rich families and inherit everything they owned as well as getting with the Grim Reaper.

Jim starts a graveyard business.

Jim and Grim officially become boyfriends. Grim moves in, gets pregnant and spawns Grimey. Grimey is given to another family in trade for Jules Cooper, Beejey’s boyfriend. Jules dies soon after.

Jim tries to kill Dennis Racket and pose as him but Dennis kept coming back. He was unkillable. But Jim bangs his wife anyways.

Jim robs people as Santa.

Jim opens a vet clinic and gets scarred for life by cursed dancing dogs. He also adopts a cat named Pumpkin during this time.

Beejey passes away and Jim goes on a jungle adventure to mourn his loss. Dennis also finally dies.

Jim moves to a new house with a proper dungeon and becomes a vampire.

Jim officially starts a cult, the same cult the fandom is.

Jim opens a joint restaurant/graveyard that only serves pufferfish. Many die.

Jim has a kid with Emma Racket, Dennis’ wife. His name is Project. He also became a cop briefly during this time. Weird era.

Jim dies and takes the universe with him so he jumps to an alternate timeline where he didn’t die.

Jim hosts a winter pool party. Many die and EA later patches this.

Jim kidnaps two Father Winters, Ryland and Clement. He tries to kill them but they cannot die, so instead they become permanent household members. One of them gets pregnant with aliens twins who end up being First Name and Second One.

Grim starts a painting club and Jim opens a store that sells the paintings. Jim also starts a band around the same time.

Jim goes to therapy and we learn about his past. Jim’s parents were Dick and Janice Pickens. He was forced to live in a closet, his parents didn’t care about him and his father was also a serial killer. Jim was taken away to military school due to the neglect.

What happens in between the sims 1 and sims 2 prequel videos is unknown and up to speculation. My theory is that it’s where he met Dennis, since they were around the same ages and were both taken from neglectful parents. Though Dennis turned out more stable and Jim was considered a lost cause because of his violent tendencies.

As a teen, Jim is somehow back in custody of his father and lives in a house with mole people in the walls. The moles are Mole1, Mole2 and Mole3. He tries to get a girlfriend but Dick kept throwing water balloons at her.

After therapy Jim becomes even more unhinged. Starts a YouTube channel and kills people on camera for content. He also did a twerking video.

Jim moved to his universe’s equivalent to LA and drives a man to suicide after ruining his life so he could inherit everything from him. Jim didn’t inherit anything from this.

Jim starts a content farm in his basement. Kevin totally isn’t a subject of it and this whole series isn’t just a documentary.

Jim opens a bar that doesn’t let people leave and he loses it. He starts killing people for simply existing and Grim stabs him to get him to stop. 💔

In attempt to fix his relationship with Grim, he goes camping with Grim but forgets he’s a vampire so it didn’t really work. So instead Jim cures his vampirism. Second One also drowns during this time.

Jim moves everyone into an abandoned prison and hosts a battle royale. Shrek wins and joins the household.

Jim falls in love with breadsticks and literally couldn’t let go of them.

The family moves to Strangerville and Jim becomes dedicated to solving the mystery of that town. He discovers the Mother Plant and is killed in battle against her.

Jim comes back as a ghost and defeats the Mother Plant. During Shrek’s sex dungeon era (that’s a weird sentence) Jim comes back to life. A miracle!

Jim somehow goes to the future to chase after his father who had gone there. Jim gets a bunch of half-siblings and Dick gets a boyfriend; Mole4.

Back in the present time, Jim becomes a merman and he’s absolutely beautiful. First Name also becomes a drug lord and they smuggle drugs across borders together.

Jim and Grim get married and Jim’s last name briefly changes to Reaper.

Jim starts a gang and goes to war with another gang. It ends with the other gang dying and Jim going to prison for once. They finally got him.

Once he was out of prison, the zombie apocalypse starts and Jim starts a restaurant that serves human flesh to accommodate the zombies. Jim also makes the two Santa’s fight to the death. Clement was the winner, he eats Ryland. Dick and Mole4 now join the family.

Jim goes to the magic realm and learns more magic. He uses the magic to terrorize other families and moves into a new house he killed the previous members of.

Dick declares himself as King and starts making people pay taxes to him. Jealous, Jim kills Dick for the title and doesn’t do anything with it. He was just fed up with Dick’s bs.

Jim goes to university. He becomes the worst landlord and also gets pregnant along with a few others. His child’s name is Aaaahhhhhh.

After that he moves the family again and tries to get as many people as he can to live in one tiny house. First Name dies and comes back as a demon to forever haunt Jim and terrorize the land.

To escape First Name, the Pickens family now lives in a bunker. Jim tries to enforce the “nobody can go outside” rule by locking people inside their homes.

Jim launches a nuke and destroys that section of the world because the people were annoying him. He is now the only remaining family member, besides Grim.

Jim meets Turg and the two team up to become the ultimate crime-causing duo, even if Turg doesn’t want to admit it. The two rob several homes with Turg as the distraction and Jim doing all the robbing.

Jim starts a knitting business with someone who won the lottery. Default joins the family.

Jim goes to the Star Wars. Idk if this is canon or not.

The cult compound is now here. Kevin only does one video on it despite streaming the building of it for hours. Nice.

Jim, Turg and Default go on a winter vacation to the mountains. Jim ages into an old sim and loses his sparkle 💔

Jim and Turg move into a haunted house together and Jim takes on several new jobs such as paranormal investigator, house renovator and murder speedrunner. Jim dies of old age during this time but comes back.

Jim starts an industrial farm, Turg is there too but he starts becoming irrelevant after this 💔

After dying to pufferfish, a clone of Jim shows up and Jim kills him.

Jim starts kidnapping people and making them play sick twisted games that results in people’s deaths solely for his own amusement. Karma catches up to him and he is shot.

Jim starts going absolutely insane. Even more than before. He spawns 100 babies, goes through strange changes and gets stuck in an apartment with 99 other people. Turg dies off-screen during this time.

Jim marries someone and that is the last we see him. That’s the end of the story.

I don’t think the current sims 4 series is canon to this one. It’s separate.

Hope this helps and gets you caught up/refreshed on the lore :) hopefully I didn’t miss anything. I did this entirely from memory :3

Jim is one of my favourite characters ever I love him so much. He was the only queer representation I had growing up too lol.

the problem with reading and writing leading to a strong vocabulary is that you tend to know the vibe of words instead of their meanings.

if I used this word in a sentence, would it make sense? absolutely. if you asked me what it meant, could I tell you? absolutely not.

Squid game shitpost