Summary:
While overcoming recent heartbreak, you decide to join Tinder in search of a rebound. Your friends advise to just Swipe Right indiscriminately... What happens when 4 soldiers from the same squad match with you?
Pairing:
141 x Reader
Chapters:
Teaser
Prequel
1- Kyle
2- Johnny
3- Simon
4- John?
More chapters - COMING SOON!
also adding the updated taglist here just in case! dm/send ask to be added
@daisychainsinknots , @bunnysdaydreams , @iite-cool , @lahniu , @pagesfalling , @tapioca-milktea1978 , @live-love-be-unique , @thelaisydazy , @littleghosthunter , @bossva , @emotion-no-hot-yes-hotel-trivago , @chamomiletealeaf , @ghosts-hoe , @kariiiel
YOU AND GHOST MAKE UP AFTER A FIGHT
I uh...kinda got carried away on this one. 18+ minors dni.
⌠you're fighting over something stupid, but both of you are stubborn as hell and won't let it go. the walls of your apartment shake as you slam the door behind you, and you can hear Simon's exasperated groan even through the door as you storm down the stairs
⌠it's late when you come back, the living room and kitchen empty. the door to your bedroom is closed, and the lights are dimmed. you debate sleeping on the couch, but fuck it, it's your bed too
⌠though simon doesn't look up from his book as you close the bedroom door behind you, you can feel his eyes dragging over you as you pull your shirt over your head, drinking in the bare skin of your back, the curve of your waist where it flows into your thighs. you hear a strangled mix of a sigh and a hiss leave his mouth as you pull your pajamas on, his eyes snagging on the lace hem when you turn to throw your clothes in the hamper
⌠you forcefully pull the sheets back, slipping into bed and tightening your jaw. simon glances up from his book, the left side of his lips pulled up, and you send him the darkest glare you can muster.
"this doesn't mean anything, simon," you snap, rolling away from him to switch your lamp off, "it's my fucking bed too." simon only chuckles, marking a page in his book and turning off his lamp, plunging the room into darkness.
⌠you lay in silence angrily, as far away as you can get from simon. you take deep breaths, trying not to revel in the warmth that simon exudes. though you hate to admit it, it's colder than you thought without being wrapped in his arms.
⌠you hear sheets rustle and suddenly, simon's chest is pressed against your back, head tucked in the crook of your shoulder, stubble scratching your neck.
"missed you today," he whispers, hands settling on your hips, dragging higher and bringing your top with them, "missed you so fucking much angel." you set your jaw again, hating how only the brush of his against your skin could get you so riled up, could get your resolve cracking.
⌠you don't respond, but your body sinks back into his, goosebumps erupting across your ribcage as his hands travel higher. you knew where this was going the second his fingers reached the hem of your shirt, but you still gasp softly as his huge, callused hands cup your breasts, rolling your nipples between his fingers.
"fuck you, simon riley," you try to hurl the words at him, but they come out as whine, your back arching as you lean towards his hands, chasing the stimulation. he groans, cursing under his breath as he slips his bare leg between your thighs. "i know," he groans, "i know, i'm sorry, lovie, let me make it up to you, please..." his voice his low, husky, desperate, one of his hands trailing downwards to land on your hip.
⌠his hand guides your hips as you roll them against his thigh. it's slow and messy, his low voice and the darkness only making you leak harder on his leg. you're moaning freely now, clenching desperately around nothing, head thrown back, landing on simon's chest. he's not in a better state, rutting against you, unable to stop the groans and swears that leave his mouth.
"you're a piece of shit," you gasp as you turn around, pressing your lips to simon's. he kisses you back desperately, still moving your hips against his as his tongue sweeps across yours. "i know, i know," he gasps against your lips. his hands are shaking as he pulls your shirt off, pulling you close to his chest, letting your nipples rub against his faded t-shirt. but it's not enough. "off," you moan, pulling at the hem of his shirt. you pull it off together, relishing in the skin-to-skin contact. you loop your arms around his neck to give you better leverage, rolling your hips harder. simon's lashes flutter as his head drops back, mouth falling slack.
⌠his hand creeps underneath the waistband of your sleep shorts, cupping you as you rut against his hand. he thumbs your clit, watching through heavy-lidded eyes as your thighs start to shake, a blush creeping down your neck and chest.
"si," you gasp, and he bites his lip at the sound of his nickname, "think- think I'm gonna-" "cum for me," his voice is halfway between a growl and a whine, he's so desperate, he's about to cum in his boxers like a fucking teenager just from grinding against you and the thought only makes him whine, ducking his head into your neck.
⌠you cum hard, all over simon's hand and wrist, thighs trapping him between your legs. he drags your lips into a messy kiss, thumb rubbing tight circles on your clit until you whine from overstimulation and push his hand away. he brings his hand to his mouth, eyes rolling back in his head as he sucks you off his fingers.
⌠you lie there together in silence, one of simon's arms thrown over your waist as you catch your breath, forehead resting on his scarred chest. his fingers toy with your hair idly.
"i am sorry, you know," he whispers, pressing a kiss to your forehead. you look up at him with a soft smile on your lips, pressing a kiss to the back of his free hand. "i know," you whisper back, "i'm sorry too. it was a stupid fight." simon tilts your chin up, huge hand cupping your jaw as he kisses you, slow and soft and sweet. "though," you start, speaking against his lips, "if this is how we make up, maybe we should fight more often." simon throws his head back and laughs, a true, full-bodied laugh. you press a butterfly kiss to the tip of his nose before pushing the blankets back and padding to the bathroom. simon groans, both at your absence and at the glare of the bathroom light, propping himself up on his elbows and throwing an arm over his eyes. "come back," he groans, blinking in the harsh light. you shake your head with a little hum, starting the shower. "nope. we both need a shower. a clean, sinless shower," you emphasize as simon pulls himself out of bed with a smirk, making a face as he pulls off his ruined boxers. he wraps you in his arms, tucking his head into the crook of your shoulder as steam starts to fill the bathroom. his hands are greedy as they trace over your bare skin, and he drinks in your giggles like wine. he can't believe how in love he is. "no promises," he whispers in your ear, tucking a strand behind it and leaving a kiss on the arc of your shoulder. you playfully shove him back into the shower, laughing harder as he pulls you in after him.
⌠all in all, it's a pretty good way to make up after a fight.
who put feelings in my porn????
Iâm just imagining Simon who happens to stumble upon your roommate ad. And of course he thinks heâd be a perfect candidate. Heâs clean, minimal and of course, gone most of the time. Heâd still pay, heâs good mannered, quiet- he would absolutely be good for this pretty girl whose profile picture on his phone he canât stop looking at.
He just wants you to be comfortable with someone like him, with someone who looks like him- but when he meets you, all those fears go out the window. Youâre kind, so warm and open to him. Youâre receptive and heâs so unnerved by it. Youâre not what he was expecting at all, but heâs so in love with you right from the get go.
It makes leaving for missions so much harder. Especially on nights like tonight when youâve made dinner for two, youâre looking absolutely gorgeous in your pajamas, youâre smiling sweetly at him. Bloody hell, the things he would do to you if had the chance-
It doesnât really click with him until this moment that he actually can do something about it. In his head, heâs conjured you up to be so out of reach and untouchable. But thatâs not true at all, itâs just a fear that heâll overstep. However at this point, the night before he goes, it feels now or never. He supposes he can always move out if it doesnât work, heâs just got to know.
âSimon? You okay?â You ask gently, taking your apron off and hanging it back up on the pantry door.
He gets up from the table and heads straight for you. You stand there in shock as he removes his mask, he takes your hips into his grasp and pins you against the door.
His forehead meets yours and he closes his eyes, inhaling your scent and enjoying this moment being so close to you. Your hands automatically latch onto this shirt, toying with the fabric, eyes moving to admire his face, his lips.
ââŠwant you.â Simon murmurs out, his mind is reeling and he wants needs to feel you on him, to have you at least for tonight. At least to try. He just needs you to reciprocate, show him some kind of sign you want this too.
âPleaseâ. You beg and just like that he springs into action. His lips latching onto yours, heâs shoving his leg between your own and youâre writhing against him and the door. Your hands in his blonde hair, exploring his chest, you go until you run out of air. Heâs digging his thumbs into your hips, cherishing this moment and heavens above - you feel so good on his body, better than he could have fathomed.
Simon ends up making quick work, bringing you to your bedroom where he lays you down, his body on top of yours. Grinding into you, his mouth never leaving yours, your neck, your breasts. He then moves to take off your clothes, making his way down your body. Gently removing your panties and kissing your inner thighs, the scruff of his slight beard making your skin tingle.
He laps at your folds, his tongue circling your bud, his fingers deep within you. You cum around him and heâs in awe at the sight, your back arching in pleasure. You glance down at him and heâs smirking, it makes him feel good to know he made you come undone like this, that youâre all his.
âYouâve got me all night, love. There will be plenty more of this when I get back.â
gaz.
ghost whoâs cock is so big he sits in bed with you for hours, just rocking his hips happily back and forth as you watch your movie on the laptop just so you can learn to get used to the size of it.
âsâjust practice-â is always his excuse, and you canât blame him. it does infact feel good when he just crumbles atop you and practically kills you with his big body, cock gently sheathing in and out of your cunt.
itâs easier to get used to, afterall.
ghost character analysis
tw: spoilers from ghost mw2 comics, nsfw, dead dove do not eat, mature content.
this is pretty much a part 2 to ghost headcanons except with more lore and analysis (im still not sure if reboot ghost has the same backstory as the og ghost).
ghost is not a cold, calculated, ruthless man. maybe in a separate au or something, but theres a huge difference between ghost and simon riley. in fact, we need to understand that the reason he even chose ghost as a new name for himself is because of all that's happened to him. his family got killed, he got tortured by roba, and had to eliminate many men on his own. before that he was simon, not ghost. in the comic he literally calls the child hostages he was saving âsweetheartâ and âloveâ. hes not that mean and cold yall
we know that PTSD does shit to it's victims, ghost lost his entire family and had no one. think of it as a coping mechanism to have a new name to be known as.
ghost is a ruthless killer. simon is just some guy.
ghost sets himself to an incredibly high standard of discipline. i think it's intuitive that military boys will need to be punctual and organized to some degree, but ghost takes this to a whole other level. considering his father's abusive behavior (explained by his disturbing statements said to simon, is a drug addict, and beats simons mom) his home life was likely chaotic as a child.
in the mw2: ghost comic (issue #3) it specifically stated the following: "discipline, precision, control. these are what riley built his whole life on. break those down and the dark stuff begins to ooze out..." again, this is probably a form of trauma response to his childhood.
so what does this lead to? well firstly, this probably means his room is incredibly tidy and organized (monotone design i know :,c).
would never in his life touch drugs. this is a promise he made to himself.
also kinda proves that ghost aint a reckless guy. he thinks things through before doing it.
ghost isnât that hypersexual. theres no way of knowing his history with women, but i like to think ghost is not that horny 24/7 and needs a fuckbuddy. in the mw2 comic, he was on a mission and was in an area full of prostitutes (wasnât actively on duty, but on his way) when they tried to hit on him he politely rejects one of them, and later tells them to fuck offđ so yea contrary to popular belief i dont think he really enjoys one night stands or the idea of being entertained by random women. in fact, i hc he might actually be a virgin or just a really low body count.
ghost is a feminist!đ (misandrist too). ok let me reword that, ghost doesnt like men and respects women. one of the reasons why he doesnât want to be around prostitutes and do one night stands (his father killed a hooker in front of him, very traumatic) is because he thinks the concept of quick, casual sex is not good for society and dilutes the value of meaningful relationships. but also, remember the discipline, precision, control thing? its apart of his principle. but also, in the comic, sparks (soldier he worked with) knocked out and attempted to rape a woman, ghosts literally looked disgusted and called the police (also why heâd never do that himself, i dont get the hcs that say he does). ghosts seen how his dad treated his mom and absolutely hates abusers. anyways onto misandryâi think ghost internally thinks men are violent and disgusting (ghosts would choose the bear over the man, even though hes a man) mainly because throughout his military career majority of the bad stuff hes seen was done by men, so hes much more relaxed in a room of women vs man. ghost thinks his dad is the epitome of pure evil (canon! he said this to his therapist). this doesnât mean hes scared or hates all men tho!
ghost isnât close with 141⊠including soap. now before you attack me let me explain. sure, he trusts them to some degree, but i dont think they naturally just hangout when theyâre not deployed. in the end we need to understand they are SAS soldiers, they are working a real job that mainly consists of them shooting and dismantling others. considering ghosts betrayal in the past (in the comic, a few soldiers ghost previously worked with killed his entire family đą) he isnât gonna just trust his teammates because theyre his teammates. im also pretty sure they all live in different cities while not deployed, while also considering the fact that tf141 probably all want to separate their job from their personal lives, which includes co workers. but onto soap, i dont think him and ghost have a deep brotherly relationship. but i think they care about each other, but exchanging some dad jokes and bantering doesnât mean theyâre suddenly soulmates or brothers. think about it⊠you and youâre co worker joke around sometimes, never hangout outside of work, and now people are shipping you and calling the two of you besties. makes no sense.
ghost is extremely patriotic. in the comic (i reference this way too much but theres SOOO MUCH LORE i recommend reading it) ghost tells his teammates the reason for joining the military: queen and country, right after 9/11. he also said âthe world has changedâ. interestingly enough army enlistment did actually skyrocketed after 9/11 attacks, ghost was among them. he probably thought ww3 was about to happen, or that âtheres no more peaceâ or whatever. i hc being obsessed with soccer too lmao and getting mad if english teams dont win. also his playful banter with johnny âget us a tea?â. probably very proud of his british heritage.
ghost doesnât have much friends. hes a really, reallyyyyy lonely guy. i hc him as an introvert in the first place, but trust issues make this worse. in the comic, he was literally in the newspaper for killing his family and then killing himself (he didnt, he was framed that way tho) so its likely most of his formers friends probably think hes dead. ghost likely got some sort of amnesty or exemption from the military after knowing he didnât actually kill his family, but whats in the news stays true to the public. even if he does have friends he probably doesnât share feelings with them or form a long term bond.
ghost is extremely cynical. this is obvious tbh, but i think ghost believes hes going to die in the middle of a battlefield, shot or stabbed, a painful death, body left to rot for weeks, and no one to remember him. just like that. and he accepts that fact too.
ghost isnât a picky eater. growing up in an abusive household where his parents couldnât hold a stable job, he had to eat what there was. some days he settles for cheap beans and toast and when people call him out for it, he tells em to fuck offđ
ghost is emotionally fucked up, probably kind of depressed. i mean this guys been through hell: got saâd, buried alive, had to dig through underground dirt and worms with a jawbone, tortured in horrible ways, had his entire family killed, abusive dad, and the weight of his grey morales because he killed lots of people as a soldier. wow! would you look at that list, itd be more strange if he wasnât emotionally fucked up after was has happenedđ . even when tortured, seeing his family dead, ghost was never shown to have cried in the comic. i hc hes emotionally numb. however, i do think hes emotionally MATURE and able to communicate his emotions, but hes still emotionally fucked. for example a scene where he was talking about his experience with roba (guy who tortured ghost) and ghosts father to a therapist. i think ghosts may be traumatized, but this doesnât stop him from attempting to get help and communicating how he feels and thinks about this world.
BUT WHAT ABOUT AN S/O???
i think ghost is the guy to not have one in the first place. obviously. but i lowkey think if he had one and really liked them, he would commit. in fact i find it hard to imagine hes a player or isnât serious about relationships. when his brother tommy got addicted to drugs and fucked up his life, simon quit the military until tommy got 100% better and married. yup. he stayed to help him recover, for years. thats how loving and committed this man isđ„čđ„č.
more random headcanons:
simon prefers dogs over cats because dogs are loyal and stay with you until the end (stereotypically)
hates snakes and spiders
probably wouldnât do 50/50 on dates, he pays!
avoids saying manchester slang when deployed
drinks and smokes. not always. heâs disciplined but he still does that stuff.. hes a british guy in his 30s whos kinda depressed, grew up with adults around him smoking 24/7, whatd you thinkđđ (its canon that most of tf141 smoke anyway)
listens to 80âs rock music. its canon that his mom enjoys the band siouxsie and the banshees :)), he probs does too
shaves his beard
is actually confident hes not bad looking. dude, hes 6â2, in shape with a jawlineđ
Oh he makes me SICK
simon grunts, his chest heaving as he palms at his chub, tracing the twitching muscle of his cock and letting out a hiss at the muted pleasure that razes through him. he shivers at the heated look you give him, your pretty eyes awash with desire, scalding as it trails down the lines of his bulk until it settles on his flesh.
âah,â you whisper and simon nearly moans at the awe in your voice.
âsâright, baby,â he says, feeling the way he pulses underneath his low-hanging sweats. âsâall fâr you.â
there is a whine that drags itself from the base of your throat, so primal in the way it scratches your vocal cords, and simon has to fist his cock to stop himself from rutting against his palm.
âi canât,â you whine, pouting, your eyes still trained on his groin. ââm gonna be late for work.â
âplease,â he croaks out, breathless himself. âhow about jusâ the tip, love? jusâ give daddy a taste of you âround me, yeah?â
simon knows it is playing dirty to pull this card on youâto exploit your one weaknessâbut simonâs guilt is tucked underneath his stretching need, the desire bloating as it leaks past his rationality, leaving him with thinning restraints.
your sharp inhale is all the answer he needs.
he bites the inside of his cheek to tamp down the smirk dancing to the corners of his lips.
âokay,â you reply, tentative and quiet. âbut just the tip, you promise?â
âswear,â simon murmurs.
like a goddamn liar.
he relishes in the squeals dripping from your parted lips, only for them to be muffled into your pillow.
heâs got you on your knees, your front all but pressed flat on the bed, your arms having lost the energy to keep yourself up as simon fucks you from the back. heâs got fistfuls of your ass, using them as sweet, sweet leverage as he manhandles your body back to his cock.
âso good fâr daddy, sweetâart,â he rumbles, his voice so deep it even sounds foreign to him. âso, so fuckinâ good, love.â
he punctuates his words with hard thrusts; drawing his cock out slowly, deliberately torturous so he can watch the way your hole grips at his cock, not wanting to let him go, before punching it back in. he doesnât stop and keeps pushing his cock past the gummy press of your walls until his hips are pressed flush to the fat of your ass.
then, he repeats the processâsharp snaps of his hips leaving you twitching, and simon watches with a crazed giddiness as your hands uselessly scratch at the sheets as though that could tether you.
he bends forward, his bulk covering your trembling body. âsuch a cute darlinâ for me, lovie.â he ruts his cock along a particular sweet spot. âsay âthank youâ to daddy?â
he hears a warbled reply from where your head is pressed to your pillow.
âhmm? whaâs âat?â
simon cups a hand on your forehead and carefully pulls, tipping your head up just enough that he can hear you.
he hears a hiccuped sob, then, âthanâ you, daddy.â
simon giggles and presses a kiss on the back of your head. âwhat a good doll yâare.â
something about that makes your body tremble, spasming in his hold, and simon watches with awe as your toes curl, before he has to let go of you at the sudden tightening of your walls. his eyes go white, his ears ringing with a sharp static.
he feels so, so overwhelmed at the expanding euphoria that washes over him, lapping at the synapses from the back of his skull to the cavity of his ribs.
âyou came,â simon mutters in awe, his voice passing through his teeth like a gritted hiss. âchrist, lovie-â
-
The answer to your problems is self-discipline
that 141 x reader you just did was so good! i need to know what happens next. like after reader is better, do they stay in the military? stay in 141? or do they take a discharge? Iâm not the original ask but it was just so good.
love your writing btw!
thank you! hereâs part two :)
part one here / part three here
you were beginning to hate the infirmary.
the white walls. the moans of pain. the smell of bleach and blood.
the reminder of why you were here. of who put you here.
your friends. your family. your team. john. johnny. kyle. simon.
youâd told the doctor to not let your teammates in, and she had tried, but there was only so much she could do. she couldnât monitor the door all the time, and so a week after waking up from your coma, john price is sitting at your beside once again.
his hands are clasped together, knuckles white with the intensity of his grip. heâs leaning forward, elbows resting on the bed, hands under his chin. his position conveys his regret and worry. he looks like he should be in church, knelt between the pews and spewing silent prayers to a god that isnât listening.
you havenât spoken to him since he sat down ten minutes ago. the second you saw him step inside the infirmary, you knew he was there for you. there to try and speak to you, to apologize.
fuck him and his apologies.
you turned your head to the side, eyes staring at the white curtain separating your bed from the next. you studied the stitching while you listened to him breathe next to you. he hadnât spoken eitherâ just sat down and watched you.
it made your skin crawl, how he thought this was okay. how he thought this would be the way to get back into your good graces.
he clears his throat then, a sound youâve heard a million times before. it makes you want to gag now.
âlove,â his voice is soft, caring. you want to hit him in the jaw.
âcan we talk? please?â
you donât turn over, donât even spare him a glance. you keep your gaze trained on the curtain. the only giveaway that he has your attention is the fists you clench at your sides.
he takes the silence as an invitation, that bastard.
âwhat happenedââ he begins, then grunts. stops. takes a second, then begins again.
âwhat we did,â he says, and you roll your eyes. âit wasnât right. the intel was from a trusted source. weââ he sighs then, and you can tell heâs rubbing his temple. he did that when he was stressed. when he was anxious.
âwe were wrong to believe them over you, love. and imâ im sorry.â
silence ensues. you donât give him any indication that youâve heard what he said. he sighs again, inhaling deeply.
âyouâre still part of this team. johnny and gaz, theyâve been sitting outside this damn room like sentries. can barely pry âem away for drills.â he chuckles then, but itâs sad. pitiful. mournful.
âthereâs nothing we can do to make this right,â he tells you. youâre still mulling over what he said about johnny and gaz. still hung up on the fact that he didnât mention simon at all.
simon, who did the most damage to you, both psychologically and physically. simon, who shared your bed. simon.
simon, who is too much of a coward to face you for his crimes.
âbut we want to try,â price is speaking again. âif youâll let us.â
he stops talking. waits a beat, then two. then, you hear his chair scrape. heâs getting up, and thatâs when you turn your head to face him.
he looks bad. bags under the eyes, skin pale, beard overgrown. you think he deserves this. deserves worse than this. his eyes meet yours, and they widen the tiniest bit at the attention youâre showing him.
your voice is full of venom as you speak.
ânothing,â you seethe, angry tears blurring your vision. âwill ever undo what you did to me. what he did to me.â
price knows youâre talking about simon. the whole team knew you were a thing. hell, when theyâd strapped you to that chair and debated who would âinterrogateâ you, they hadnât even thought to include simon. why would he want to torture the person he loved?
to their surprise, he had volunteered to take point.
âwhen i get out of this bed,â you continue. âim gone. and i never, never, want to see any of you again, or else im putting a fucking bullet between your eyes.â
the captain doesnât speak. you can see the remorse on his face. you couldnât care less about his feelings.
he gives a short nod, and without another word, he turns and leaves the room.
after johnâs visit, no one else tries to visit you. you no longer catch glimpses of kyle or johnny outside the infirmary door. youâre glad theyâre starting to get the hint.
but youâre still getting flowers. you donât know where theyâre coming from. sometimes theyâre dropped off by a nurse, other times they appear in the morning after a restless sleep. thereâs never a note. never anything to suggest who would be leaving them.
you know itâs one of the 141, but you donât know exactly who. you feel certain itâs not simon.
but, unbeknownst to you, it is him. he knows you donât want to see himâ to see any of them. price had told them all about what youâd said to him during your talk.
price had also told them that heâd already started preparing your transfer papers. that had caused an uproar from soap, whoâd quickly been quieted by a saddened price.
simon had expected it. expected worse, actually. he knew that if the roles had been reversed, he wouldnât have been as merciful as you. it made him hate what theyâd done to you so much more.
there had been the tiniest doubt in his mind when all the evidence pointed to you. he hadnât believed it at firstâ and then things became damning. everything pointed to you. trusted sources were pointing their fingers at you, and everyone listened. he had listened.
he had volunteered to torture you because heâd been angry. rage he hadnât felt in years bubbled to the surface of his skin, and he wanted to tear you limb from limb. how dare you come into their livesâ his lifeâ and betray them so substantially?
simon didnât trust easily. he was battered and broken and scarred. shattered and malformed pieces hastily glued back together. he let the team in. let you in. let you see his face. let you into his bed. let you into his fucking heart.
and you turned around and drove a dagger into him. or so he thought.
he thought his anger and actions had been justified. thought he was doing the world a favor by butchering you. but he was wrong. the team was wrong.
he finds himself regretting how he hadnât listened to your pleas, but thereâs nothing he can do about it now.
he knows the chances of you forgiving him, of letting him back into your life, are slim to none. but how could he not at least try?
youâd know each other for years. been together for years. all of it thrown away because he still knew the hurt of betrayal all too well. because it was too easy to fall back into the mindset that it was him against everyone. that the only person he knew, the only one he could rely on, was himself.
so he left flowers. your favorite ones. and he did so without making you face him, without apologizing or groveling. it was the least he owed you.
a month after your coma, you were finally allowed out of the infirmary. you were still healing, skin still tender and bruised. pink, jagged scars lining your skin; eternal reminders of the pain youâd been subjected to.
youâd been given a t-shirt and a pair of jeans, which youâd pulled on with much fuss. every time you struggled or stumbled, you found yourself getting angry. angry at the men who did this to you.
the anger was going to eat you alive, at least thatâs what the psychologist that had been dropping by to see you had said. sheâd told you you need to let it go, and youâd laughed in her face.
how do you let something like this go?
you didnât know. you didnât think you were strong enough to do that. not a good enough person to forgive the men that had carved into you.
once you had dressed, you shuffled out into the hallway. youâd profusely denied an escort, and the doctor had reluctantly acquiesced. sheâd let you go, with just the promise that youâd keep your iv hooked in.
so here you were, trudging down the halls of the base, iv pole rattling along behind you.
you could feel eyes on you, but no one dared to get too close. you were glad. you didnât want more empty apologies and sympathetic words.
you still remembered the way to priceâs office like the back of your hand. you doubted youâd ever forget it.
time and time again youâd found yourself here. sometimes, getting reprimanded. others, congratulated. a few times youâd shown up in tears, and price had let you in without a word.
now you were standing outside his door, trying to contain the rage in your veins.
you raised a hand. knocked once, firm and loud.
âcome in!â price called from inside.
you were already twisting the door knob, pushing into the room.
your eyes found price first. he was leaning against his desk, arms crossed over his chest. his hat was absent from his head, instead resting beside him on the desk.
and then you noticed simon.
he was wearing all black. his hands were covered, bones decorating the black gloves. gloves youâd seen many times before. gloves that had been pressed to gunshots, trying to stop the bleeding.
the lower half of his face was covered, allowing you to see from his eyes up. his sandy blonde hair was ruffled.
you quickly turned your attention back to price.
âlove, what are you doinâ here? you should be in bedââ he began, but you waved a hand as you stepped further into the room. you pulled your iv pole in behind you, then kicked the door shut.
âdonât talk, just listen. i still mean what i said when you came to visit. the only reason im here right now is because you havenât put in for my fucking transfer.â you hissed.
the captainâs eyes widened, his face taking on a sheepish expression at the revelation that heâd been caught. simon stood quietly beside him, eyes trained on you. you ignored him.
âlove, i didnât want to do anything before you were readyââ he began. you cut him off.
âbullshit! you didnât want to do anything because you donât want me to leave. you want me to forgive you, right? hear you all out? come back and be a happy little family again?â
the room fell eerily silent as you stared at the captain. your heart was roaring in your ears.
âput in the fucking transfer, john.â you finished.
he reluctantly nodded. he inhaled, his eyes glancing at his lieutenant briefly, before he spoke again.
âof course, love. âm sorry.â
you didnât say anything else. you turned to go, your back to the men, when simonâs voice cut through the air.
âyou should be respectful to your captain, sergeant.â
you froze as you took in his words. was he fucking serious?
you didnât turn around. you trained your eyes on the door as you spoke words through gritted teeth.
âyou should watch your tongue, lieutenant, before I fucking cut it off.â
with that, you pulled open the door and stepped into the hallway, slamming it loudly behind you.
authorâs note:
apologies for the wait! I hope everyone enjoyed! (this is being posted before proofreading, so I hope itâs okayâ Iâll read through it later, itâs just late and im tired lol)