hi i was wondering if you could do gavi fluff where after he scores his first goal of the season or something and the reader starts crying with how she proud of him she is and it’s all fluffy SHDHFHB x
this one is for you-pablo gavi
pairing: pablo gavi x reader
author’s note:i changed it a bit and this one is about his first goal for barcelona,i hope you don’t mind! thank you so much for requesting this,it’s such a cute idea and i hope you will like this as much as i liked writing this :)
word count: 1,000
what is a life without dream? when growing up,everyone looked up to someone as an inspiration. some wanted to be doctors,firefighters,some want to be pilots and be as close as possible to clouds. some literally wanna reach the stars and fly-so they go on to become astronauts. although pablo didn’t wanted to be astronaut or pilot,everyone around him from young age knew sky was his limit. pablo’s dream since he can remember was to play for barcelona under lights of one and only camp nou. dream of million little boys all around the world is about to become a reality for your boy. one of dates he will remember forever is 29th august 2021,when he made his first appearance for barcelona. when you told him he made the history,it wasn’t an exaggeration. just 24 days after his 17th birthday,he became the fourth youngest player to appear for barcelona in la liga. you will never remember how happy he looked when he stepped on that pitch. before the game,he said something that you wrote down when he gets a documentary one day.
“tonight i’m gonna leave my heart on the pitch for every little boy that is dreaming of doing the same. and more importantly,for every girl that believes in them.”
it is safe to say that he fulfilled his promise and you didn’t miss out on a single game ever since then. he was the happiest kid in the world. a thousand things went through his head and he had to admit that he felt bit nervous before. nonetheless,as soon as he stepped on the pitch nerves disappeared when he remembered you were watching him from the stands,as you always did. looking back on it,it was not that long ago when you were still kids. to be fair,pablo is still like a kid but that’s one of the many things you love about him. that is one of things that will never change. not that long ago he broke your window with ball when he was playing on street. even though your dad jokes with him that he still didn’t forgive him for that,everyone knows he loves him like his own son.
a few months went by,but pablo felt like he disappointed you and everyone else around him because he struggled to score. everyone backed him up;from coaches,parents,friend and,of course,teammates in the locker room. his disappointment in himself didn’t go unnoticed by you.after all you knew him better than yourself. everyone noticed his head was down and he wasn’t his usual self. he was undeniably charismatic and light up every room he walked in. naturally,everyone were determined to lift him up just like he did them anytime they needed it.
“your time will come,just be patient and don’t lose your mind over it. i know you wanna prove yourself,but you already exceeded everyone’s expectations and this is only the start.”
“what if i don’t live up to expectations and end up being…average?”
“last time i checked average players don’t start for barcelona at 17 years old and don’t get called golden boy.”
“you are just saying that to make me feel better but thank you.”
“you are adorable when you pout,but seriously don’t be so harsh on yourself.”
“you’re right,enough of pouting…for now. i was thinking,what celebration i should do when i finally score? it’s probably not gonna be today buy yeah…”
“hmm i don’t know,maybe kiss the badge? you always liked to do that.”
“yeah,i might do that one.”
“you know i will always be there and i can’t wait to see that,but don’t stress yourself over it.”
“i love you so much,princesa. are you ready,i don’t want to be late,xavi will kill me.”
“yeah,i’m coming. don’t want you to get in trouble,do we?”
it was hard to point out what exactly gave the impression that tonight would be special,but you just had that feeling. after you found your seat at camp nou before their game against elche,you were soaking up the atmosphere and thinking to yourself that people that have never been at this magical stadium don’t know what are they missing out on. these last few weeks you developed a habit of taking pictures of kids who had pablo’s jersey to show him after games. it still felt so unreal and he couldn’t help but blush everytime you showed him pictures. it reminded him of how proudly wore his iniesta jersey he got for birthday. fast foward to today,now someone is wearing jersey with his name on back. crazy how things can turn around.
you were confident that barcelona will win but in football,anything is possible like pablo always reminded you so you didn’t want to underestimate opponents. first 15 minutes went by quickly and everyone felt more relieved when barcelona scored the opening goal. you were so focused on pablo because you didn’t want to miss anything and truthfully because he was mesmerizing as always. you wanted to take countless photos,but it felt pointless to record during whole match when you can enjoy the moment. thankfully you don’t have to worry about photos because there are tens of photographers on the sideline and you mentally thanked them for their service. few minutes later,you saw him slaloming through their midfield. could this be the moment he was waiting for? it was. for a moment,it felt like the world stopped spinning and the only thing you could hear is announcer screaming his name. you rarely cried,but when you did they were tears of joy. he instinctively kissed the badge and unlike some who do it out of lust,he did it to show undying loyalty to club and fans. to show his loyalty and gratitude for you,he wrote you a message with black marker under his jersey. he revealed “este es para ti princesa<3” and all you could’ve think about is how lucky you were that he was the one that broke windows of your castle. maybe your childhood dreams of being a princess weren’t far-fetched after all. fairytale days were supposed to be over long time ago,yet it didn’t feel like they are ending anytime soon.
no way?? news came out just after i said whoever wrote script for this season doesn’t deserve a raise??
WE GOT OUR 15 POINTS BACK MOOOVEEEEE
CAPTAIN KEPA YOU ARE SOMETHING SPECIAL
fragments of us - part one
pairing : christian pulisic x reader
summary: “you think okay i get it,i’m prepared for the worst, but you hold out that small hope, see, and that’s what fucks you up. that’s what kills you.”
warnings: mentions of infertility
author: i already have ideas on how to continue this series so if you liked this one and want more parts let me know! any feedback is appreciated and thank u for reading, i hope u will like it <3
We had a lot of dreams in place. Reflecting on it now, we took for granted the control we had. Unfortunately,we didn’t even think that some things were out of our control.
Two years ago, when we sat on your porch discussing our future,we thought we had all the time and possibilities in the world. In the beginning,you were hesitant to mention one specific dream of yours.
Then one night,you were stroking my hair and I surrendered to your soft touch,my eyes were getting heavier by your every touch. My eyes were closed,but I was still awake because I wanted to savour every moment.
Your soothing voice made it really hard to not drift off. I immersed myself into every story you told me.Particularly the ones that included me,that included us,even though I already knew where was story going. At least from my perspective.Our perspectives weren’t different. At the time, we rarely fought.
Your stories gave me insight into the world through your eyes.Insight into how you’ve seen me and your actions aligned with your words and, how could I ever ask for anything more?
That night when you thought I was asleep,you confessed something you were afraid of when I was awake.You always wanted to have “Christian Jr”. It took everything in me to not laugh at your confession. I still remember how flastered you were when I told you I wasn’t asleep. At first,you thought I pretended I didn’t hear you because that’s not a dream we shared.
A feeling of relief washed over you when I showed you my list of names I loved because who doesn’t have one?
Today is the day we didn’t see coming. But yet, I think we both have seen it coming. For all the foresight I had and the fears we quietly admitted to,the doctor’s words hit me like a ton of bricks.
They made our worst fear official. Lists of baby names won’t ever be used. There is never going to be mini you or mini me. I hope and I pray that someday, our dreams will be realised. That we will find our promised land and taste the sweetness of milk and honey. Until that day,can we promise to love each other as we have been loved?
Dating Pedri González Would Include...
Dating this guy is being in a roller coaster, in a good way
You met him on a clothing shop, casually walking with your girl friend when he walked behind you and tripped causing him to step on your back heel pulling your shoe out.
"Puta madre, joder, I'm so sorry"
"...They were white"
"I'll buy you new ones"
"Nah, don't worry. I'll just give them a wash and all good"
The moment you smiled at him and not yelled at his face for his mistake, he fell for you.
You knew who he was but you also knew he was just another normal human being who was really good playing your favorite sport and outside the pitch he was just Pedro.
But still commented he should always be careful, look around and not only on the pitch with a smile on
"You know me?" He asked as you laughed lightly
"But you're also funny" You laughed "Kind of forgot who you are?" He shook his head still amazed by you
"Pedro González" He shyly said as you smiled
"Y/N Y/L/N" And with that you left
He searched up for you everywhere.
TikTok, Twitter, Instagram... You name it, he searched for you and he found you.
@ pedri asked to follow you
You smiled and accepted him
And ever since that day, he texted you daily, he found ways to connect with you, a friendship was born and later on, your relationship.
The amount of love this man has for you it's not countable.
He often uses Lightyear's phrase when you ask him how much he loves you: To the infinity and beyond
He's just deeply in love with you.
Talked about you to his parents.
And when you finally met them they instantly loved you. Rosy was happy she got you as the daughter she never had. And Fernando was happy his son was happy and in good hands.
Going to his matches with the 8 on your back, supporting him.
Having inside home dates and them being the best ones ever.
He L-O-V-E-S spoiling you.
He would gift you a bracelette with P.G8 in your three months anniversary, since that day you've never taken it off.
You on the other hand give him a black bracelette too with your initial and a football ball. He only takes it off when he plays.
Your parents love him and he loves them.
Whlist driving he would definitely have his hands with yours or on your thigh
Singing at the top of your lungs while he drives. Also being the DJ, often playing Quevedo, Rosalía and Taylor Swift
Car rides towards nowhere, just driving the two of you during midnight for late night McDonald's or the ones where you go to the beach or a little 2 days vacation.
Talking about driving.
He would and would not like to teach you how to drive.
He would because you look absolutely gorgeous in, with and doing everything. And he also would want you to drive him around sometimes. And he wouldn't because he loves driving you around and also he's afraid for the three of your lives. Your, his and his cars.
Either way, after lots of begging, he would accept.
Teaching you should be both a really good and bad memory together, laughing, spending good time with each other and at the same time he's shitting himself for both of your lives
"LOOK AT THE ROAD!" "I'M LOOKING!"
Fights like every other couple, but you both eventually calm down for a while and fix the problem.
He can get jealous, if he's feeling intimidated. Quickly showing everyone, who you belonged to. But he trusts you with his life.
You trust him too, but get jealous as well and mostly when there are some girls who ignore your existence and just shamessly flirt with him.
You can't believe their audacity.
You also know he doesn't have eyes for any other girl but you. He has let you know that and doesn't mind reminding you who he belongs to sometimes.
With sweet words, acts and you know...
He lives for making you happy.
"Pap-I mean... Pepi"
"Y/N"
You are best friends and lovers at the same time.
Everyone loves your relationship.
INSIDE JOKES
You could be out with the team or family
When Fer (mostly) says something and it reminds you both to something, expect you both crying in laughter and face fully red not being able to explain yourselves.
Fer hates when that happens but secretly he loves the fact his brother found his person.
His hand is in yours all the time.
He just loves grabbing your hand in his. Playing with your fingers calms him down.
Meanwhile you, play with his ring to calm yourself down.
You also love leaning into his chest, it's just so big, perfect and strong that you wanna lay there for the rest of your lives.
He would try and help you with homework but the second he saw the amount of calculations, laws and unknown words he got up.
"You get into it, I'll make you some food amd cheer for you"
He would share his food with you, surprising everyone in his house. Especially Fer
You looked at his plate and pocked his bicep a few times making him look at you "¿Qué pasa?" "Your chips look better than mine, can I have one?" He smiled kissing you softly "Las que quieras, bonita" He grabbed two "Venga, here comes the airplane"
When Fer tried it wasn't the same result tho
"Heyheyhey, what do you think you're doing?" "Grabbing a chip?" "No"
You would be the type of private but not secret couple.
Definitely being seen around sometimes, mostly in his car.
But no one knew your private life since all of your social medias were private.
His true fans, love you and love the fact you make their golden boy happy.
The guys teasing him as they see Pedri being whipped.
But they were happy for him that he found you.
He's happy that he found you. And he wants to have you by his side forever.
And you want him forever too.
Who knew a stranger in a clothing shop who pulled your shoe out would end up being the love of your life?
Expect a relationship full of love, laughs and joy.
So, like I said in the beggining. Dating Pedri is to put roller coaster mode on, in the best way possible.
°°° °°° °°° °°°
Taglist: @gaviypedrisbride @stuckinaf4nfiction @elijahslover @azzpenswrld
reblog if your inbox is always open for new members of the fandom who may be a little shy or intimidated. doesn’t matter whether or not you’re a “popular blog”; everyone here is equal and if you’re reading this as a new person/someone considering entering the fandom, we will not turn you away!!!! talk to us!! make friends!! i more than understand being shy but trust me this fandom is chill come join us in this hellhole
marcus Rasford thanks 😁
sure,do you have anything particular in mind?😉
getting nervous not gonna lie but that lineup is looking good and i’m praying boehly said we are winning 3-0 because he paid referee
losing to arsenal is painful but jorginho being part of the arsenal team that we’re losing to is soul destroying
“he is someone that a prince is based off of and maybe in another world, he would actually be my prince, but we don’t all get our happy endings”😩🥺🤍
word count: 6k!
i am in love with my best friend. and i think he’s in love with me.
i’m not trying to be vain but i can’t deny that the way he looks at me is a look of love, lust and passion, matching the one i give him.
i’ve never been in love with anyone but him. when we first met all those years ago it was like cupids arrow had pierced through my heart and since then i have been infatuated with charles leclerc.
the truth is though, who wouldn’t be? what’s not to like? he has the dimples that appear even after the worlds worst jokes and eyes that would have you hooked as his gorgeous plump lips ramble about a number of different things, he has everything a girl could want.
and yet he never made a move on anyone else. it’s just been me and him, y/n and charles, the dynamic duo.
until that day on the hill.
i’m not oblivious to the fact that time is going on and that our lives are getting shorter and shorter each day, i know that if you want something so bad then just go for it or else you’ll miss your chance. i’m also not oblivious to the attention charles gets, i know he’s so gorgeous and attractive but how am i meant compete with those front cover models?
“it’s a nice day today, isn’t it?” charles asks me, his eyes squinted due to the beaming sun.
‘any day with you is a nice day’ my thoughts say as i quickly come up with a response.
“it really is”
“did you hear that theodora got married and carlas off to paris for uni. it’s like time has finally caught up with us. and i’ll be off at the races again soon, which leaves you all alone, because unlike my mother and enzo you will never have anything to do that doesn’t end up leaving you even more getting bored.”
everything he says is true and extremely saddening. when he’s gone i will have nothing to do but wallow in sadness, thinking about all the beautiful women he will meet day in and day out.
“you don’t have to go, you could stay here”
this is the moment he will say he loves me back and we can run off into the distance together and live our lives peacefully.
he laughs at me, probably at how ridiculous of an idea that was.
“why do you want to run away and maybe sail away on a pirate ship far into the distance.”
i just look at him. taking in all the beauty i can see right now and i appreciate it for the hundredth time because i know that this is the last time he will look at me as if i am just a friend.
i inhale deeply and charles notices and i can tell he knows. he knows i am in love with him but instead of a look of happiness, i receive a look of what i can only perceive as anger.
“no y/n.”
those two words break me.
“don’t y/n”
i now understand what heartbreak actually is. it feels as if you’re heart has been pulled out of your chest and stomped on over again as they point and laugh at you as if you are a child.
i can’t help but try and fight the truth of situation, i mean what else am i meant to do in the heat of the moment, just back away without a fight? i am incredibly in love with this man and i can’t seem to let him go, it would hurt to much.
“charles, i’ve loved you since the moment i met you and i tried to ignore it at first but it just got to much and you were just so perfect that i couldn’t help it and i tried to let you know earlier but you would always shrug the topic away but now you have to listen to me and give me an answer once and for all because i can’t deal with this any longer, i really can’t.”
tears are streaming down my cheeks when i am finished. i am in pain but no one could ever understand me. i am in love with a man that will never EVER love me back and yet i was so naive that i dug my hole deeper by begging for him to give me just one chance.
he speaks but i can barely hear it as my ears and my head have gone numb.
“charles you don’t understand how hard i’ve worked to please you and keep you happy, and i gave up hanging out with my other friends to spend time with you and i’ve never complained because i thought that you would finally notice me and that you would say how much you loved me even though i’m not half as good as those-”
“you are good enough y/n. in fact you’re too good for me and i am so happy that you’ve been there for me all this time because i’m so grateful and proud of you y/n and i’m sorry that i can’t love you the way you love me i really am.”
“you can’t love me?”
“i can’t magically change the way i feel about you and i wouldn’t want to lie and i do love you like that when i really don’t, it wouldn’t be fair, i’m sorry y/n, i’m so desperately sorry that i can’t love you the way you want me to but i can’t change the way i feel.”
i take two steps back, stumbling slightly as if the words that charles has just uttered are boxing gloves that hit me over and over again in the stomach.
“well i can’t love anyone else but you charles. trust me i’ve tried.”
“y/n it would never work even if we tried our hardest. i would be away all the time and you love your job enough that you would never quit it! and the way i fold my clothes and cook my food winds you up we just wouldn’t work!”
“if you loved me charles then i wouldn’t care, but only if you loved me”
“i’ve tried again and again and i’ve failed.”
“everyone expects it, the media, carlos, your family everyone so charles say you’ll be mine and we can run away together and be happy!”
“i can never say ‘yes’ with all my heart say i won’t say it and eventually you will look back at this and see that i was right and you’ll thank me for it, trust me when i say that.”
“i would rather die then love someone that wasn’t you!”
“no y/n you’ll find the perfect man one day and you’ll love him ten times more than you loved me and you’ll see that there is love after heartbreak. you’ll see how we never would’ve worked and that this love you feel for me right now was nothing but the love of a friend. you’ll see how i would’ve made the worlds worst husband and that the way i do things is so unbearable.”
“anything else?”
“no… except from the fact that i don’t think i will ever love and marry someone as much as you did for me and i don’t mind because i’m happy how i am now.”
i shake my head, how can a statement be so untrue.
“you will love someone. you will live and die for them, waiting on their beck and call and i know that because it’s just true, and i will watch in the corner of sorrow and under the watchful pity eyes.”
“y/n…”
i walk away. the two normal beating hearts that entered the conversation are now like shards of glass and we both cry, even charles, the one that broke and stole my heart.
it’s been many years since that day yet, he still manages to haunt me, in my dreams, in the faces of the people i walk past day to day and yet i have gotten nothing but silence from you. i’ve been forced to move on with my life even if my heart is still stuck in my past and i can’t help but reminisce on what could’ve been.
i’ve tried doing different things to get my mind off, which is why i am currently walking down the roads of monaco. the sun is beaming down on my face and for a moment i feel as if i am free, unaware that at the start of the street is arthur leclerc.
little arthur leclerc, the one that would always try and barge into charles’ room whenever i was around and the one that had fallen in love with me, though i never took notice. i never noticed the way he lit up with joy whenever i was around, or how his cheeks were always a deep shade of red whenever i would speak to him. i didn’t notice because i was too in love with charles, or i was just blind. it’s probably both.
arthur leclerc sits in the passenger seat of his friends car, who is chatting away, though arthur is not taking in a single word, too busy looking out at the world that surrounds him. he looks at all the people that are lost in their own world admiring how they look so peaceful, until he sees her,
the girl that made him realise love at first sight was real. she was the girl that made little him realise that just because he loves someone doesn’t mean they have to love you back. the girl that made him smile just because of her presence.
“y/n! stop the car! y/n!”
he jumps out immediately, leaving his poor friend all alone in his car, though arthur doesn’t care as he runs towards the girl from his past.
“oh arthur! oh how you’ve grown! the last time i saw you, you were up to my shoulder, now look at you, i’m up to your shoulder!”
it’s true, arthur was a new man, he was handsome and so mature, he… well he looked like charles.. but better? i’m not sure.
“yeah, it sure has been a long, long time! i was waiting to see you at the hotel party!”
“you were very hard to find and i couldn’t see you and trust me i looked far and wide!”
“well you didn’t look hard enough”
“maybe we passed at one point but you’ve become so beautiful, i just coulnd’t recognise you!”
he pulls a face at my compliment and laughs.
“oh please”
“why? what did i say? i was just being hones-” i can’t keep a straight face and i burst out laughing, i never was a good actress or charmer.
“no, not at all. where’s your mother and father anyway?”
“they’ve gone to london, leaving me all on my own but it’s okay, at least i’m having fun”
“by having fun, do you mean drinking and clubbing and flirting?” his voice is teasing me and i don’t seem to mind, it’s been a while since i’ve seen him of course,
“oh please don’t tell your mother!” i tease him back, i’ve always loved his mother,
“well what are you doing here hmm? are you chasing some strapping young gentlemen.”
ouch. i know he’s joking but it still hurts to be reminded of what has happened in the past so i put on a half hearted smile on my face and say “no”
he instantly drops his cheerful tone and instead puts a more thoughtful and sombre look.
“oh.. i… i couldn’t believe that charles turned you down, i thought it was all some joke at first, i’m sorry.”
“don’t be. you’re not charles so it’s okay and i expected it.”
“OI ARTHUR! COME BACK” arthur’s friend shouts, still sat in his car.
we laugh, a real one.
and as arthur runs back to the car he’s shouting “come to the new years party! everyones going so you wouldn’t want to miss out. oh and you can finally meet laura! meet me at the hotel at lets say seven and wear your nicest dress!”
“i will!” i say and then i am gone, my mind returning to the sad mood it was in earlier.
arthur watches from his seat, turning his head to meet the annoyed face of his pal.
“it’s y/n!”
“i know”
he looks at her again with so much love, the same amount he’s loved her since he met her.
it was gorgeous. the atmosphere, the decor, the banquet, everything, it was so beautiful, well at least what i could remember. arthur leclerc stands in the middle of the room chatting away, of course due to him being the favourite shining star in the room. he switches between dancing with his partner laura and then drinking with his friends, overall charming everyone that he passes by. but his mood goes sour after spotting me, in my drunken haze chatting obnoxiously with two men i had found on my way to the venue, sat on the sofa placed on the edge of the room.
he frowns and sighs as he pulls himself together to approach us without making a scene.
“y/n” he scolds, his hands placed on his hips.
“arthur” i reply back, mocking his tone of voice
“i waited and waited”
“i’ve been caught I waited an hour for you.”
“i’ve been caught gents” i say putting my hands up.
arthur scoffs and turns around, walking away, which causes me to follow.
“arthur please, i’m sorry!”
“do you want to know what i really think of you y/n?”
“what do you really think about me?”
“i hate you. i hate you so much”
i can’t help but chuckle slightly at how blunt he sounds.
“why do you hate me arthur?”
“because instead of moving on and being happy you are too focused on the past, it’s unbelievable!”
“oh that’s interesting arthur.”
“well i mean selfish people do like to talk about themselves.”
“am i selfish then?”
“yes, very. what with your money, talent, beauty and health-”
“beauty you say?”
“of course you mention that you vain vanity. when you have all these gorgeous things around you, you can only focus on yourself.”
i go to grab his hand, wearing the ring that’s been there for many years.
my voice comes out mockingly as i say “i will be good for you mother arthur i swear!”
he sighs again.
“are you not disappointed with yourself?”
“no”
“you’ve never done a day of hard work in your life and the ring you’re wearing right now looks absolutely ridiculous.”
“charles gave me that ring”
silence.
“i feel sorry for you and i wish you would just get over it.”
“you don’t have to feel sorry for me arthur, you’ll feel like this one day”
“no i won’t, i would rather be respected if i couldn’t be loved then act like a child.”
the next words i let out are nothing but my drunken words.
“what have you done recently anyway arthur? have you done any? or have you been too busy ogling over women that aren’t yours. poor laura clark. LAURA CLARK everybody.”
i leave the silent room quickly leaving arthur to pick up the pieces of the night.
“i’m so sorry laura.”
it’s been a couple of days since everything went down at the new years party and yet arthur hadn’t been able to get the girl off his mind, even when he was driving on the bloody simulator! he wondered what was going on with him. was he sick in the head to imagine a different girl lying his bed instead of his very loving girlfriend?
“hello arthur!”
speak of the devil and she shall appear.
“i don’t want to talk to or see you”
“oh arthur my darling i’m so sorry for how i behaved, it was the alcohol that made me say it, please forgive me!”
i pout my lips at arthur, putting on my best puppy dog eyes,
“the alcohol you say… did you have some before coming to see me?”
“only a little, and i mean it is happy hour somewhere so you can’t expect me to not drink away. plus, i’ve only had a little so you can’t be too hard on me”
my hands part slightly to show visually how much i’ve drunk, which if i must say so myself isn’t the same amount i normally
“no one else is doing it, so i’m doing it”
i ignore him, focusing on the track he’s currently “driving”
“soooo when are you getting on the track, mr leclerc?”
he finally pauses the track to turn and face me,
“never.”
his face is sad but i can see he’s accepted his future,
“um what are you talking about. what do you mean ‘never’ “
“i mean that i am never going to be ‘arthur leclerc the best driver ever’, i am always going to be know as ‘arthur leclerc - chalres leclercs little brother’ “
“oh arthur that’s a strong statement to make, at what twenty?”
“well i’ve matured quicker. i see the world how it actually is and it’s made me realise that no matter how hard i try, i will always be in the shadows. so i gave up.”
he’s an idiot. a handsome one but still an idiot
“why though? you have so much talent that shouldn’t be wasted.”
“well you should know that just because i have talent doesn’t mean i can make it. many people have this talent and yet they’ll never ever get as close to where i am right now. and i want to either be the best or nothing, no in-between and right now i am nothing so i will stay that way forever. ”
i don’t say anything for a while.
“so now that you’ve given up with racing, what are you going to do instead?”
“well i guess i will get a job and settle down, marry someone and have some kids.”
i laugh.
“i guess that’s where laura comes in hm?”
he pushes me playfully and scoffs.
“don’t make fun, she makes me happy”
arthur knows that what he’s saying is true, but he just doesn’t mean it the way you would assume he means. laura is a nice girl, someone that makes him happy when he’s having a bad day, but only in a platonic way. he’s tried time and time again to make himself love her the way she does to him, but no matter how much he tries, he just can’t because when he closes his eyes, the girl that was his past is there. her haunting smile plastered on her face, eyes bright.
“i’m not, trust me! though i have to ask, are you engaged to be wed yet?”
“no…”
the air is tense between us, yet i can’t help but continue to ask questions.
“but one day you will be won’t you, you’ll get down on your knee for her soon won’t you.”
“probably, yes. she makes me happy”
“well that’s… nice but it sounds weird to hear arthur leclerc is planning to marry someone one”
“well i’ve always know i wanted a family young, so why should i be embarassed of that?”
“no, i never said that i just mean that… just that as long as you love her that’s all”
“well i think we have the power to choose who we love and that it doesn’t just happen.”
“i think history would disagree with you.”
“well i am not history i am just a human. a human that wants to just make my family and friends proud. i want to have a family and a wife who i can love so very much. i want to support my family and i want to love whoever i want. i want to get over my past and focus on my present and future and yet i just can’t.”
the sound of a car honks, causing both of us to jump in fright. arthur speaks first
“that’s probably laura now,” he turns to me “how do i look? do i look okay.”
i look at him. i really look at him.
“you look.. you look so handsome, you are handsome arthur”
i don’t see it, but arthurs cheeks are now a deep shade of red. he attempts to smile it off and then runs off to meet with laura, leaving me to watch from the window. they embrace and they laugh and smile together and i can’t help but feel nauseous in my stomach but it can’t be jealousy. it’s just me feeling protective of this boy, the one i’ve known since i was a child. yes, yes that’s what i’m feeling.
a few more days have passed and me and arthur have managed to become great friends. i’ve also managed to bury my feelings, or whatever i’m thinking about him as well. we currently lay beneath a big oak tree in the park and we busy ourselves with the occasional conversation. arthur also busies himself, by occasionally sketching out a drawing. we’ve found peace in the world.
the silence is broken when arthur asks “y/n when are you going to see your parents?”
“oh, quite soon.”
“you’ve said that over a dozen times this month, trust me if i earned money every time you said that , i would be the richest person ever!”
“well, short answers will always save trouble and i don’t know exactly when.”
“they expect you y/n, so why don’t you just go see them.”
“i’m not ready to go back i guess and if i go it means we won’t get to hang out together anymore.”
i jump up and playfully swat him, bringing my hand up to punch him but he grabs it before i can even lower it. i stare at him long and hard, analysing ever single detail on his face. i really don’t get how i never noticed how good looking he was when we were young. and at least he notices me.
“what are you doing?”
“i’m looking at you.”
“no y/n, i mean what do you want to do with yourself?”
“i’ve been trying to write a play, figured that would be something that could get me somewher-”
“it’s a waste of your time.”
“well what better idea do you have for me?”
“go back to your parents and go back to uni and get your degree, just make something of yourself, doing something you enjoy.”
he returns to his sketching once again and i can’t help but become curious of what he’s drawing. arthur obviously notices my curiosity and hands me one of his old sketches, one he did years ago. it’s of me and charles, me staring at him and him looking off into the distance. pffft how much of an idiot was i? he didn’t see me as more than a friend and it was clear even if you took one glance at our behaviour towards each other, what with me always wanting to hold him close and look him in the eye and he only wanted to hang out with me. i guess i was just blinded by “love” to notice that the love wasn’t even love, it was friendship.
“when did you do this one?”
“um that one was … the day of the beach i think, the day i met laura”
just the mention of her name, makes me want to run home and scream and cry into my pillow. god and she’s his fiancé as well. i feel bad because i haven’t even met the girl but i just can’t seem to stop my blood from boiling and then i get this realisation in my mind.
i’m in love with arthur leclerc. god, people must think i have an obsession with the leclerc brothers, but i can reassure you i don’t. i don’t see him as charles leclercs little brother anymore, i see him as arthur leclerc the boy who has made you the happiest women in the world by just being next to me, and never have i felt more grateful for that day on the hill, because that day i was set free and without that day i never would’ve seen arthur as anything less than a friends younger brother. yet i’m too late now, his heart has been stolen by another and i will never ever, get the chance to hold him close and feel his fingers running through my hair. i will never get the chance to speak to him about how much i love him without being rejected so horribly. i will never get to tell him that his laugh is like a drug to me and that his smile is a cure to all of my pain or that he is.. he is just everything to me. he is someone that a prince is based off of and maybe in another world, he would actually be my prince, but we don’t all get our happy endings.
“when is she coming back?”
“a week maybe two but when she gets back, we’ll start getting the planning together.”
i don’t know where i get the confidence to utter the next words but i do.
“don’t marry her.”
i prepare myself for the harsh rejection but all arthur can let out is a quiet
“what?”
“i said don’t marry her.”
my voice is louder this time and i’m sure he can hear what i’ve said.
“why?”
“you know why arthur…”
i take two steps towards him and go to grab his hand but he pulls away.
“no. stop it y/n… you’re being mean and you know it. you can’t just mess with my feelings like that, i’m not a toy.”
by now tears are slipping down our cheeks.
“why?”
“i have always been second to charles, in everything and you know it, but what you don’t know is the amount of times i’ve cried over you and the fact that charles had gotten the girl was heart braking and yet now you care when you feel like you like me back. y/n that’s not fair. you can’t just pick and choose when you want me. especially not now when i am happy-”
“but your not happy and you know that! i see the way you are with her, leading her on. you’re acting like charles did to me so don’t call me mean.”
“but you are y/n and i won’t stop this wedding just for you to love me for a month or two, no i won’t do it, not when i’ve spent my entire life loving you.”
it’s been a day since arthur last saw you and he already missed you like crazy. he really don’t know how charles managed to give up such an amazing girl like you, it was a topic he would often think about. either way, arthur couldn’t stop thinking about you and your sad eyes as he left you alone in a hurry. he rushes into his friends house, excited to actually finally have peace for the first time in weeks
“hello mate!”
“y/n was just here.”
“was she?”
“yeah, she said she would be off to see her family for a bit” his friend nods and arthur can’t help but smile.
“when will he be coming back here?”
“why do you care so much, what do you need to chat about so urgently?”
“… i just told laura that i couldn’t marry her.”
“does you breaking up with laura have anything to do with y/n?”
“yes.”
he doesn’t even bother lying because he’s in love and no one is in his way. he can love the girl of his dreams freely, without shame and with the knowledge that she loves him back. wow, that feels nice to say.
i watch as arthur stands at the train station, waiting with his luggage, occasionally checking his watch, when i pull my car up, getting out and walking towards him slowly, still aware of the tension between us.
“i couldn’t let you go home alone and i figured i needed to go home as well, even if you hate me.”
“oh y/n i don’t hate you.”
“i love you” he wants to say, but he can’t.
we hug and when he pulls back he holds eye contact with me and says “i’m not marrying laura”
“i heard.”
“i didn’t do it for you, i did it for me so don’t you think for even one minute, that i did this for you, it’s because i realised, that i didn’t love her.”
i look at his face carefully, with nothing but love and affection, when i slowly take his face into my hands and kiss him. i kiss him slowly at first and then a bit quicker, arthur matching my movements, we kiss for the time that we could’ve been in love with each other and we kiss to grieve the time we lost, and i know that this is how it’s meant to be. this is what home feels like and this is what forever feels like. arthur is the one for me,
meanwhile, charles sits with his mother, taking a break from the stress of the races, looking out at the world, thinking about his past and future, when suddenly, his mother speaks up.
“did you know that y/n is coming home soon?”
that makes charles interested, straight away lifting his head encouraging his mother to speak more.
“is she?”
she nods “arthur messaged, he’s coming home, he said he misses us dearly and he said that y/n will come home with him.”
“hmm that’s nice of her to join him.” charles stands up quickly and begins to pace the room anxiously.
“what’s wrong?”
“i think maybe… maybe i was a bit quick in turning down y/n.”
“well, do you love him?”
“i think that if she asked me again i would say yes…. but do you reckon she’ll ask me again?”
“i didn’t ask that charles… do you love her?”
“ i want to be loved.”
“you know that isn’t the same thing”
“i’m just so lonely ma”
“i know charles, but it’s okay.”
charles suddenly feels the need to express his words for me, writing pages and pages. it reads:
‘dear y/n, i miss you more than i have ever missed anything. i haven’t been able to get my mind off of you for a couple days and i’ve realised that maybe letting you go was one of the worst i could’ve done. i think it was because i was young and i didn’t want to make such a big commitment that could possibly ruin our friendship, which was ruined anyway as soon as i said no. but time has moved on and i’ve matured and i’ve come to the realisation that i cannot live another moment without waking up beside you and that i was a fool to turn you down. i just hope that even after all this time i’ve still managed to stay in your heart because i can say without a doubt, you will always be in mine.”
once finishing the letter he places it on the pillow of the guest room, the one that the girl he loves will put her head on. he feels free after putting it down, finally being able to say the words that have been on this conscious for a while.
“charles” i say, nudging my friend out of his slumber. “charles.”
his eyes flutter open, widening once he sees me.
“y/n! oh y/n your really here!”
he jumps up and bundles me into a hug, one that makes me stumble backwards whilst wearing the biggest smile i had ever seen in my life.
“oh charles, did you miss me?”
i feel charles nod against me and i smile.
“i really did, you don’t understand and no words can express exactly how happy i am to see you either.”
“oh thank god, i thought that you would’ve forgotten about me. anyway, i wanted to speak to you, alone.”
“yes, yes what is it. come sit down.”
the air is different. it’s not like we’re twenty one again, always laughing and joking around with each other. no it isn’t like that at all, because we’ve grown up.
he attempts to make a joke. “how was arthur, did he bother you on the flight with his constant chatter?”
i laugh and smile, just at the thought of arthur.
“yes but i loved it.”
“speaking of arthur, where is he? did he stop off somewhere before coming here?”
“he’s speaking to your mother, and you just know that no matter how hard i tried, there was no way i was getting my boyfriend out of her clutches.”
i don’t see it, but charles’ face drops instantly as soon as the word ‘boyfriend’ leaves my mouth. boyfriend? arthur leclerc dating y/n y/l/n?
“your… your what?”
once i realise my mistake i sigh in dissapointment.
“oh god. now i’ve done it! we were supposed to keep it a surprise for dinner but look at me! i ruined it!”
“what surprise?”
“well, that arthur finally plucked up the courage and finally asked me to be his girlfriend of course!”
“you and… arthur.”
“yes, it happened very fast, one day we were just friends and then the next were in love.”
“are you really…. in love with him?”
“yes. oh and charles i wanted to say just one more thing and then we can just sweep it under the mat forever. i have always loved you charles and i probably always will but the love i have for arthur is different…. you were right, by the way, we would’ve killed each other.”
“ye- yes.”
“i think we were lucky to not go any further than a friendship so thank you charles.”
“oh,… y/n/n.”
“did you know that no one calls me that apart from you.”
“what does arthur call you?”
“princess.” i’m joking of course but i don’t charles realises, once again proving that we are now different people.
“that sounds like him. you deserve each other.”
“charles… can we still be friends?”
he swallows painfully and forces out his words.
“of course y/n, forever.”
we move to go downstairs, myself going to greet their mother again, whereas arthur meets charles at the bottom of the stairs, pulling him to another room.
“did y/n tell you?”
“yes.”
arthur looks at him expectantly and charles feels the anger overtake him and he feels as if he could fight with arthur, just as they used to when they were children but manages to calm himself, reminding himself that getting angry with arthur would ruin the relationship he had with you, again.
“arthur, i’m happy for you, i really am. it was written in the stars.”
“oh, thank goodness, i wish i could’ve told you myself but it just happened so fast and i was just really scared of how you would feel because, well you know why.”
“no, no. never.”
"so you aren’t angry?”
yes. yes he is but never would he say it out loud, it would be a secret he would take to the grave.
“life’s too short to hold a grudge against your brother.”
“thank you charles.”
and arthur really means it, because without charles no, arthur never would’ve gotten the girl of his dreams. without charles saying no, he would still be standing on the sidelines and he would forever be in debt with charles for that.
but charles didn’t mean it, because due to charles saying no, arthur got the girl of his dreams and due to charles saying no, arthur got to leave the sideline and now no amount of repaid debt would ever make charles’s heart feel half as full as it did when y/n was his best friend.
but y/n was never his, she was arthurs and he would just have to accept that.