— Ocean Vuong, Because It’s Summer

i really dislike it when people don’t understand perfectionism.

like, it isn’t always “person who has tons of motivation and spends a ton of time making this thing *just* right”

wayyyyyy more often than not it’s:

”I know that if I try to make this thing, it won’t be perfect, so I simply won’t try.”

which definitely sounds bad, right? but when you realize that it doesn’t just apply to voluntarily making art, then you realize how perfectionism is not at all a good thing in any context. 

“i know that if I try to work on this assignment right now, it won’t be good enough, so i’ll wait until the last possible moment so that I have something forcing me to do it.”

”i know that I should start going to the gym, but I won’t see any improvement right away, so I just won’t.”

”i know that i should brush my teeth tonight, but that won’t be good enough to undo the fact that i haven’t brushed them 4 days in a row, so I just won’t.”

perfectionism isn’t the uncontrollable impulse to make things “just right”. (although it can occasionally manifest as this.)

perfectionism is the absolute, psychological inability to accept the concepts of “good enough” and “better than nothing”. even when you spell it out for yourself in a long text post like this.

latin phrases worth knowing:

(in case you wanted to know because i fucking love this language) 

ad astra per aspera - to the stars through difficulties 

alis volat propriis - he flies by his own wings 

amantium irae amoris integratio est - the quarrels of lovers are the renewal of love 

ars longa, vita brevis - art is long, life is short 

aut insanity homo, aut versus facit - the fellow is either mad or he is composing verses 

dum spiro spero - while I breathe, I hope 

ense petit placidam sub libertate quietem - with the sword, she seeks peace under liberty 

exigo a me non ut optimus par sim sed ut malis melior - I require myself not to be equal to the best, but to be better than the bad

experiential docet - experience teaches 

helluo librorum - a glutton for books (bookworm) 

in libras libertas - in books, freedom 

littera scripta manet - the written letter lasts 

mens regnum bona possidet - an honest heart is a kingdom in itself 

mirabile dictu - wonderful to say 

nullus est liber tam malus ut non aliqua parte prosit - there is no book so bad that it is not profitable in some part 

omnia iam fient quae posse negabam - everything which I used to say could not happen, will happen now 

poeta nascitur, non fit - the poet is born, not made 

qui dedit benificium taceat; narrat qui accepit - let him who has done a good deed be silent; let him who has received it tell it 

saepe ne utile quidem est scire quid futurum sit - often, it is not advantageous to know what will be 

sedit qui timuit ne non succederet - he who feared he would not succeed sat still 

si vis pacem, para bellum - if you want peace, prepare for war 

struit insidias lacrimis cum feminia plorat - when a woman weeps, she is setting traps with her tears 

sub rosa - under the rose 

trahimir omnes laudis studio - we are led on by our eagerness for praise

urbem latericium invenit, marmoream reliquit - he found the city a city of bricks; he left it a city of marble 

ut incepit fidelis sic permanet - as loyal as she began, so she remains

update: kinda late but oh well, exam was alr but not as good as i wanted - at first i was really distraught but then i reminded myself of those supposed literature nerds who write Scrooge/Marley fanfics on ao3 and how failing literature meant i was definitely not one of them :D

English teachers, You either did something incredibly right or incredibly wrong when teaching A Christmas Carol in GCSE English because there is 34 works under the tag Jacob Marley/Ebenezer Scrooge on ao3. A few of them are tagged with references to GCSEs.

pied piper is the best bts song, change my mind.

reading this gave me physical pain, doing the exam on wednesday and this is just going to be on repeat in the back of my mind

English teachers, You either did something incredibly right or incredibly wrong when teaching A Christmas Carol in GCSE English because there is 34 works under the tag Jacob Marley/Ebenezer Scrooge on ao3. A few of them are tagged with references to GCSEs.

romantic things i yearn for

- dancing in the rain, no music, just heavy heavy rain - being surprised with glow in the dark stars stuck on the ceiling in pitch black while leaning on one another - learning to ice/roller skate with your partner - blanket forts and pjs, watching whatever cheesy movies you used to love as a kid - bike rides at night, preferably when its sweater weather season - nerf gun wars while diving behind furniture ( or level that up to paintballing as a team ) - aquariums ( standing together in dark spots surrounded by the dim glow of the tanks is the most romantic thing ) - last but not least, romantic and simplistic, just talking while sitting down and facing eachother for hours and hours (this wasn’t a dark academic post like normal but oh well lol - if you liked this post you’ll also like the post i did titled da dates noone will do w/ me - check that out!) - Amimi

beach weather is going on tour next year?if i get to go it will be my first concert!!! been having a lot of firsts lately, it's almost the end of december and the end of 2022. my monthly diarypost and yearly wrap up are going to be really long i think! also this is my 150th post!! only somehow took me 4 years - by that logic it'll only take me another 28 years to get to 1000 lolol

this. i can't tell whether its bad or whether i hate myself

I feel like my arts been looking worse than usual

girls will have one (1) good day when they convince themselves they've never been unwell in their life and the next day the horrors will return

an adjourned august abridgement

when it comes to alliteration thesaurus.com is an angel.

i realise this post is incredibly late, it's simply slipped my mind. to be completely honest, not alot went down during august, i visited bradford to reunite with my lovely younger cousins! i went shopping in cannon mills, which i'd like to think is the bengali/pakistani equivalent of a farmers market, and went shopping, and went shopping, did i mention shopping?

we did facemasks, enjoyed a vibrant funfair! went to the park to push around my cousins on the swings, visited my grandmas old house with my favourite cousin, visited my cousins new house, lots and lots of arguments between cousins and being told off and lectured for making the younger ones cry and visited other cousins (take a shot for every time i said the word cousin(s) ) in terms of schoolwork, not a whole lot occurred but towards the end of the month, (as in the 31st of august, the day of the deadline) i entered for the Immerse Essay Competition! in the film studies category! that was an experience in and of itself and after the results are announced (which to be honest, i'm not very hopeful for) i'll be sure to post about the competition in detail along with my essay! that's all for now! until next time! Amina