PATRICK BALL As Dr. Frank Langdon

Thoughts inspired by @saulbetter's recent posts.

This show is kind of sold or discussed as "spies! but they suck at being spies!" But the thing that all the slow horses actually have in common isn't that they're bad spies, it's that they're people without social capital. They actually range from competent to excellent at the technical aspects of their work (Ho, Catherine, Marcus, Shirley, Coe, and even River are all good at the hard skills of their jobs. We are told Louisa screwed up but in both show and books she is shown to be one of the most reliable performers on the team). But they don't have friends or patrons to protect them when things go sideways.

The reason they're the rejects is because they're loners who struggle to connect with other people for all their various reasons (childhood trauma, job-related PTSD, addiction, personality disorder, inherent temperament). So they're playing checkers when their internal opponents at Regent's Park are playing chess. To the extent that they even realize that the social/political game exists (Ho and Catherine mostly don’t), they're bad at it (Coe, Lech) and/or think they shouldn't have to play it (Marcus, Shirley). River impressively manages to be deficient in all three aspects: totally naive to the politics of advancement within the Park, bad with people, and so committed to his own view of himself as a Boy Scout that he thinks he shouldn't have to sully his hands with any of it.

This is why the show is such a brilliant office drama. This one is for all the folks who are good on paper but bomb in interviews, for all the people who are promoted based on their technical mastery and then shit the bed as managers because they're illiterate at reading people. This is why it's such a stroke of genius that River's ascendant career is cut off at the knees by tailing Taverner. He's so full of himself and such a try hard that he mistakenly thinks doing an unrequested extra credit assignment about his boss makes him clever instead of creepy, annoying, and red flagged as a potential troublemaker.

Unfortunately, because Mick Herron is unable to let the story or the characters grow, this excellent premise results in some deep weirdness later in the book series. (Weirder than the deadbeat dad child soldier sex cult plotline, you say? Idk, you be the judge.)

Book spoilers under the cut.

First, let’s talk about Lech Wicinski. (I know, no one wants to talk about Lech Wicinski, but he is the curly-haired insomniac introvert of my heart so I’m going to talk about him.) I love Lech but parts of his origin story are so stupid. He’s just a normal guy who is comfortable in his niche and relatively unambitious and gets screwed by ambitious people’s big ego shenanigans, which he falls into by accident when he unthinkingly steps outside his work comfort zone for a minute. So far, so good. But then, while he’s desperately trying to save his job and reputation, he’s also… not? Like, why would this sort of overly serious but otherwise very normal young-ish middle class man immediately and inexplicably decide not to seek medical treatment for a profoundly disfiguring injury? Why does he never even actually try to show to his fiancee that the revelation that causes the breakdown of their relationship was completely fictitious? It makes no sense! Except, the author is lazily destroying Lech’s social capital to make it make sense that he’s now a slow horse for life. 

Similarly, River can’t have Sid in S1 because she is a bright and well-rounded person while he is cute but also an idiot nepo baby manchild. So do the books resolve this imbalance by allowing River to grow - or even just change - in response to various challenges like dashed career aspirations, finally meeting his psychopath biodad, the steep mental decline of his beloved father figure, etc? No. Instead of letting River at least attempt to grow up, the books put River and Sid on a level by cutting Sid down instead - putting her in protection (ie. cutting all her social ties) and giving her a traumatic brain injury that hollows out her previously bright personality. Heaven knows we’re all miserable now. Sure do hope they fix that plotline for the show! I love them as endgame and I honestly think the show could do something so satisfying and poignant with them finally finding their missed connection but the books make the way they finally get together so creepy and sad.

RIVER CARTWRIGHT ● Slow Horses S02E05

River in the first frame all "can't you just abandon me in the garden and leave like an adult with some fucking dignity instead of embarrassing us both in front of my friend"

Revisiting this scene for giffing inspired by @countessrivers posting about it the other day bc it really is just. River's expression in the first one is so just, fascinating. Exhausted and disappointed and realising he's been betrayed again, but still just overwhelming sad about it. The way his eyes track down to look at Spider's hand clutching onto him, his lips, his eyes, the last contact they'll ever have, and then it's just.

So deeply embarrassing and pathetic!! Spider being like. hah! You moron! worried about children dying! Louisa just. Had enough. The 'sniper' going for his 'gun', pulling the most insane faces in the background. Spider gripping River's clothes about as long he can justify it's all so -

why can't you just break up like normal people?

Radio Times

Slow Horses star says viewers "might be in for a surprise" in season 5

Roddy Ho will be a large focus this upcoming season.

"[I] might throw a few dance moves here and there."

[BOOK SPOILERS/speculation]

Please tell me this means they filmed the club scene. Please. I need Roddy wearing his sunglasses at night. I need Shirley in her natural element. I need the gang brutally dunking on River for how shit he is at picking up women.

I NEED THIS, GUYS.

Can we fix it? No, we can't!

Due to Park budget restrictions, Lamb has tasked River with fulfilling a number of odd jobs around Slough House.

JACK LOWDEN as River Cartwright in Slow Horses 2.01

quintessential jack lowden tongue acting

Why does no one write this?

River's mother suspecting he's into Diana Taverner... This gives me very, very interesting ideas...

(Lady Di would totally ruin him. Coercion and manipulation are sure to be involved.)

'You... thumped?

Jack Lowden as River Cartwright Slow Horses – S01E01 – Failure’s Contagious