Guys I Just Realized Something

This is one of the things that's so great about Tolkien's work, that you look at it closely and it doesn't fall apart instead you find these weird little details that maybe weren't intended but because the story fits together so well are totally true.

Probably one of my favorite random things about LotR is the fact that

a) Pippin did a Gollum impression in the books

b) Pippin had never MET Gollum before that point and never would

c) yet it was an ACCURATE impression, as it startled and was recognized by the orc he was speaking to

d) the only possible explanation for Pippin Took’s accurate Gollum impression is this: Bilbo, while telling stories to the eager children, must have imitated Gollum perfectly

Thank you for this quick overview. Lawns were originally designed to imitate sheep pastures like you might find outside a old English manner house but we have drifted to mono-diversity and sterility.

I...tried to make a meme and got carried away and made A Thing that is like partially unfinished because i spent like 3 hours on it and then got tired.

I think this is mostly scientifically accurate but truth be told, there seems to be relatively little research on succession in regards to lawns specifically (as opposed to like, pastures). I am not exaggerating how bad they are for biodiversity though—recent research has referred to them as "ecological deserts."

Feel free to repost, no need for credit

What’s the difference between Republicans and Ukrainians?

Ukrainians defend their Capitol.

Ok, but what if Sherlock's brother was named John Watson Holmes (probably a younger brother) and when he started playing Minecraft his username was Mycraft but when he found out much it annoyed his brother Sherlock he leaned in to it and now his hacker persona is Mycroft (hacking could be a modern job that would give him a place in the government, the ability to find clues that Sherlock can't find easily, and the attitude of "can't be bothered to step away from his desk to follow up on something)

An adaptation of Sherlock Holmes set in a world in which the fictional character/literary juggernaut Sherlock Holmes, and all the subsequent adaptations thereof, still exist.

Sherlock Holmes (pronounced Holl-mess, as he is constantly reminding people) just had the misfortune of having parents who really liked the books, and his attitude towards his fictional counterpart is pretty much the same as that of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.

Sherlock runs a Youtube Theory channel called Mysteries Unwrapped with Sherlock Holmes. He has received no less than seven cease and desist letters from the Conan Doyle estate, all of which he has so faded managed to rebuff by pointing out that that's literally his name.

(No he won't change his name. He's Sherlock Holmes the real live human person. Let Sherlock Holmes the non existent fictional character change his name.)

John is Sherlock's flatmate. Sherlock almost refused to live with him once he realised that it would mean staying with a medical student named John, and only gave in once John pointed out that: a) he's a biomedical student, which is completely different from an md, and b) his surname isn't Watson.

It's now been three years, which is long enough for them to have developed a genuine friendship, and for John to have a) started working towards his PhD in biotechnology, and b) for him to start dating somebody with the surname Watson.

Sherlock can feel the narrative closing in.

His Youtube channel is meant to be focused on lost media, fan theories and stuff like that, but he keeps accidentally stumbling upon and then solving genuine crimes.

His brother Mycroft may or may not have chosen that name after he transitions specifically to annoy him.

He doesn't even live in London, but somehow the only flat they could afford was on a street named fucking Baker Street.

Sherlock Holmes and the Unescapable Power of the Narrative.

Very sad but SOMEBODY ELSE KNOWS THE OCTOPUS STORY. Don't jeopardize your grades or anything but We Need To Know!! Find one of your classmates hopefully one that can repeat a story well and find out. We will be waiting right next to our screens until you get back

“Walrus on your doorstop” this “fairy’s more unrealistic” that my professor just uttered the sentence “there was one day I found a real octopus in my backyard” this man hasn’t left Utah his entire life. How was there an octopus in his backyard in Utah. He then said “I do not have time to elaborate we need to cover a lot today in class” GIRL WHAT DO YOU MEEAN

President Putin is sitting in his office when his telephone rings.

“Hello, Mr. Putin!” a heavily accented voice said. “This is Paddy down at the Harp Pub in County Cork, Ireland. I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you!”

“Well, Paddy,” Putin replied, “This is indeed important news! How big is your army?”

“Right now,” says Paddy, after a moment’s calculation, “there is meself, me cousin Seán, me next door neighbour Seamus, and the entire darts team from the pub. That makes eight!”

Putin paused. “I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 1,000,000 men in my army waiting to move on my command.”

“Begoora!” says Paddy. “I’ll have to ring you back.”

Sure enough, the next day, Paddy calls again. “Mr. Putin, the war is still on. We have managed to get us some infantry equipment!”

“And what equipment would that be Paddy?” Putin asks.

“Well, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Murphy’s farm tractor.”

Putin sighs amused. “I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 60,000 tanks and 50,000 armoured personnel carriers. Also, I have increased my army to 1,500,000 since we last spoke.”

“Saints preserve us!” says Paddy. “I’ll have to get back to you.”

Sure enough, Paddy rings again the next day. “Mr. Putin, the war is still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We have modified Jackie McLaughlin’s ultra-light with a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four boys from the Shamrock Bar have joined us as well!”

Putin was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. “I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 1000 bombers and 2000 fighter planes. My military bases are surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I have increased my army to 2,000,000!”

“Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!” says Paddy, “I will have to ring you back.”

Sure enough, Paddy calls again the next day. “Good mornin’, Mr. Putin! I am sorry to inform you that we have had to call off the war.”

“Really? I am sorry to hear that,” says Putin. “Why the sudden change of heart?”

“Well,” says Paddy, “we had a long chat over a few pints of Guinness, and we decided there is no way we can feed 2,000,000 prisoners.”

A bronze Corithian helmet and a spear head (c.600 BC) displayed in the Archaeological Museum of Corinth, Greece.

NGC 2024, Fire in the Sky

Love it

Time travel caper where the protagonists’ ability to achieve their goals is hindered by the need to avoid interfering with some critical event that seems utterly inconsequential from a contemporary perspective. LIke, you can kill Hitler all you want, but for the sake the stability of the space-time continuum it’s absolutely essential that no action be taken that could potentially delay or disrupt the publication of Skyrim HD.

Thanks for letting us know. I never understood what they thought Tumblr live was going to be.

has this one been done yet