Going Batty Masterpost

peter retaliating against “baby monitor protocol” by changing the names of Tony’s Iron Man protocols

“hey FRIDAY, zoom in on that building over there”

“Old Man Bifocals protocol activated, Boss”

“what the fuck did you just say to me”

Masks and Music

I didn't think that my last post would've gotten ANY notes at all, so imagine my surprise when I find out that people actually liked it. After that suprise I thought why not and make another one so here we go! This is a Miraculous/Batfam crossover.

Imagine that Damian gets sent to Paris because the fam doesn't want him to become an emotionally constipated sad boi like Bruce and think that a change in scenery would help.

They don't know about the whole Hawkmoth situation because SOMEONE from the justice league decided that the while thing was a prank DESPITE that it was an ENTIRE CITY calling instead of a single person.

Like, aren't you guys supposed to be the world's greatest heros or something?

Who hired you?

Damian being the grumpy lil kid that he is holds a grudge and decides to not accept any calls or video chats from his family or tell them about Hawkmoth because that's what you get when you send someone across the world against their will.

(and because of plot convenience shhh)

Anyways, Damian goes to school as instantly adds Lila onto his mental list of people he needs to get rid of.

I mean, seriously, he's only been is the room for what, 15 seconds and he's already getting a migraine?

Great. Juusssttt great.

He sits in the back of the class with what seems to be the only person with brain cells in this room.

The dark haired girl just looks over and sees the disgust at Lila written all over his face and gives him a silent empathetic nod.

'This is unfortunately normal here.' she tries to convey through the small action.

He just nods back to show his understanding before turning around to observe the others.

In a few minutes Ms. Bustier walks in the room and asks him to introduce himself to the class.

It looks like the teacher never told the class that they were getting a new student because they all have to do double takes when they realize that there's a new face in the room.

He gives them the bare basics, telling them that his name is Damian Grayson, he's from America, and that he doesn't want any of them to talk to him before sitting down.

Clearly the teacher wanted him to say more or scold him for being so rude but a glare shut her up.

Later during a break period Lila tries to flirt with him and brags all about how she's met so many different celebrities and her achievements.

He tells her off and tries to move away but her nails are digging into his arms as she tries to convince him that he should stay away from Marinette.

Before he can maim her, the dark haired girl comes out from behind him and starts spraying Lila down like an unruly cat with some sort of strong smelling liquid from a spray bottle.

Lila screeches and stomps away.

When he turns to his hero the girl explains.

"It's a mixture of shredded lemon, expired maple syrup, vinegar, and pomegranate juice. I call it People Repellant but Thot Begone works too. Oh, and I'm Marinette by the way."

He eyes her hand before shaking it.

"Damian, though I assume you already know that. Can I get some of that by the way? I know a couple insufferable annoyances that would benefit from a spray down.

Marinette just blinks for a second before she bursts out laughing and that was the start of a great friendship.

Together they:

Make fun of Lila in the back of class.

Help eachother with homework (they only cheat off eachother when they REALLY need help)

Prank Lila in odd ways (Hey, just because she found hundreds of furbies hidden around her house that turn on one by one in the middle of the night effectively scaring the crap out of her when she's trying to sleep doesn't mean that it's their fault. She had it coming.)

Break a couple laws (shhhhhhh. Those toy stores don't need those furbies anyways).

Dare eachother over stupid things (they still insist that the cereal incident was caused by the other).

And overall become closer as friends.

They bring out the overdramatic chaotic gremlin child in eachother.

One time when Damian goes over to Marinette's place to work on a project he finds her singing a Disney song to herself on her balcony.

This isn't the first time they've caught eachother singing.

One time Marinette caught Damian in the art room at school humming one of the many annoyingly cheesy and catchy songs that Dick likes to listen to.

Despite him explaining the embarrassing situation to her she still teased him for weeks after.

He'll never get to live it down.

Damian shakes his head to get rid of the flashback when a devious smirk spreads across his face as a revenge plan comes to mind.

After carefully placing his stuff on the floor he sneakily makes his way across the space until he's right behind her.

That's when he joins in.

Screaming at the top of his lungs at first, effectively giving her a mini heart attack before eventually quieting down to a normal singing volume.

She glares at him, annoyed by his loud and obnoxious entrance before she starts singing again.

They eventually end up full Disney movie dramatically performing around her balcony with dance moves and over dramatic acting.

Is it bad that actual birds and other animals are appearing and joining in?

Damian totally kept one of the pigeons.

He named it Dolores.

(He later trained Dolores to attack Rossi on sight.)

When they're finished they end up on the floor out of breath.

They stay like that for a few minutes before Damian sits up.

"That. That was fun. I don't think I've actually ever sang before."

Marinette jolts up in suprise and turns to face him.

"Really? I never would've guessed. You have a really nice singing voice."

He would deny till his dying breath that he blushed when she said that but he covers it up with a smirk.

"Well I guess that's just because yours is so terrible in comparison."

He squawks when she jabs a finger in his side.

"Pshh. As if. Besides, my singing skills can't be worse then your gaming skills." She challenges with a cheeky smile.

"ExCuSe mE?!"

And that's how they spend the rest of the day playing video games, leaving the unfinished project to be completed on a later day.

Good thing it isn't due until 2 weeks time.

After a couple of hours playing video games, creating many possible Lila murder plans, eating pastries, and joking around, it's time for him to leave.

As Damian left for his place he got a feeling that something big was gonna happen.

Marinette also got the feeling but they both ignored it.

Little did they know, someone just happened to walk by and starstruck by the amazing singing they recorded the performance before posting it on the internet.

Imagine the duo's suprise when they wake up the next day to find themselves trending on the internet.

Luckily the video quality was pretty trash so their faces weren't identifiable but the audio was loud and clear.

The world was talking about the cute couple singing to their hearts desire on a balcony. If that's not cliche and adorable then the world doesn't know what is.

The assumption about their relationship status left them looking like tomatos but that didn't stop them from wonder why they didn't notice a creep recording them.

Damn Disney songs and their unnatural ability to distract people.

Of course Lila took advantage of the rising popularity of the video and talked about how she taught the two people in the video how to sing and gave them tips.

The two just walked past the idiot squad and sat down in their seats, making a mental note to come up with a prank later, when the akuma alarms came on.

They fall into their normal routine of Marinette running out to find a place to transform as Damian covers for her.

Oops did I forget to mention that Damian found out her identity because she crashed through his window in the middle of the night still transformed and asked him what's the answer to question 24 in their science homework because she just defeated an akuma by herself and was running on 20 minutes of sleep?

My bad.

Anyways it turns out today was the day Marinette had officially had enough of Chat's bullcrap.

It was gonna be a normal akuma situation.

Ladybug trying to fight the poor butterfly victim while chat noir either doesn't show up, tries to do everything on his own to impress her and ruins the whole plan, or just watches and complains about how she needs to get over her denial and date him BUT

This time he decided to actively try to push her in the akuma's way therefore putting her in SO MUCH MORE DANGER than she was already in.

Now she had to dodge out of the akuma's way AND CHAT'S!

WhAt ThE fUdGe?!?!

You think possibly killing Ladybug and trying to force her to beg for you to save her is gonna make her like you?!?

Just how hard did you hit your head when Gabriel dropped you on the floor when you were 2?

After the akuma was eventually defeated Ladybug told Chat to meet her on an abandoned rooftop that night because they needed to talk.

Chat being the oblivious person that he is (I swear I don't actually hate chat noir, this is for the plot I'm sorry) thought that it was for a love confession and became overly smug before leaving.

Making sure that he isn't following her, Marinette meets up with Damian at his place (school's over because of the attack) and asks him to help.

Later that day when the two miraculous holders meet up Ladybug distracts the Catboy by flirting with him while Damian uses his ninja skills for something other than sneaking up on her and giving Marinette mini heart attacks.

From behind he quickly hits a pressure point causing the other boy to fall unconscious.

Using her ALMIGHTY GUARDIAN OF THE MIRACULOUS powers, Ladybug takes Adrien's ring away and places a spell on him that makes it so he will never be able to use another miraculous ever again.

After they take Adrien home Marinette gives Damian the ring and Night Prowler is born.

He promises to do everything in his power to make sure that Selina and his family doesn't find out for the sake of his pride.

We'll see how that goes.

Night Prowler first officially appeared during an akuma named 'Break Dancer'.

Ironically, she was a ballerina that had to drop out of the finals in a competition because she broke her right leg the day before the show.

She could turn civilians into back up dancers and forced them to perform against their will.

They also worked as minions who would attack the duo for her while she stayed a safe distance away.

It was pretty obvious that the akumatized item was the music box held inside the bag that Break Dancer had slung around her shoulders but the real question was how could they get to it without becoming attacked by the backup dancer or becoming one of them.

Luckily (eheheh), a car with an open window playing music just happened to pass by before driving off.

Before it drove off, the music coming from the car was loud enough to play over the music box which caused some of the minions to become free again and run off.

Ladybug called her lucky charm and a Bobby pin landed in her hand.

As she looked around she noticed a store a couple blocks away that had a couple radios.

Unfortunately, the store was locked and closed.

Fortunately, she knew how to pick locks and a Bobby pin did come from her lucky charm soooo......

Who is she to deny literal gods.

They break into the store and grab a radio, and a speaker and rush over to where the akuma was causing chaos.

They turn on the radio, connect the speaker and turn the volume on as loud as it can go before flipping through the stations for a good song.

If they're gonna fight with music in the background they're gonna be picky about it and wont settle for anything other than epic.

While fighting they eventually get swept up in the music and end up singing along.

It's nothing less than full on majestic.

When the fight is over and the akuma is purified they find out that someone recorded it and posted it on the internet as well.

Now everyone knows that the beloved hero of Paris and her new partner were the two people singing on that balcony.

Ummmmm.....

Good thing that the video quality was trash right?

If it weren't for that their identities would've been busted the moment they started singing in hero form.

Luckily there aren't many people other than Damian that know what Marinette's singing voice sounds like so they're okay.

Well.... They WERE okay,

Until a certain rockstar and his agent came across the two videos and put two and two together.

So now King Sting (bee!jagged) and Peridot (turtle!penny) have joined the team.

Poor Penny, now she has to deal with two gremlin children and a some sort of bizarre man-child.

The next akuma confused the group quite a bit.

He didn't really do anything but sit on a rooftop waiting for the miracle team to show up.

They were all suspicious of him at first but when they did reveal themselves to him he explained his situation.

He was akumatized because his favorite rock band broke up but he didn't really want to take their miraculouses away.

He just asked if they could perform another song for him and he would give his akumatized item to them.

They all sorta looked at eachother and collectively went 'screw it why not' and sang another song.

If they were great before, they are absolutely AMAZING now.

Well that's what happens when you add a famous rockstar to a team of singing superheros I guess.

The akuma was blown away and true to his word handed over the rolled up picture in his pocket and was purified despite of Hawkmoth's nagging.

Haha screw you Hawky.

This time the ordeal was recorded by a news station and the 'hand over the akuma in exchange for a song' thing became a trend.

There were still normal akuma's that didn't follow follow it but those were far flung between.

It seems like Hawkmoth was getting annoyed by this so there started being less akuma attacks over the months.

Because of this some people were actively trying to get upset to attract one of the purple butterflies.

They traded one good thing for another I guess.

To stop that from happening the group started performing in public as superheros during concerts and festivals.

Because of this they became quite well known outside of Paris as well.

Is it ironic that more people know them as a band rather than a superhero team now?

When Marinette learned that they could change what their superhero costumes looked like if they put enough will into it she squealed.

Marinette designs superhero performance costumes for them whenever they have a festival to play at.

Whenever asked about their outfits they always reply with MDC.

Marinette's business gets really popular after that.

And since no one knows who MDC really is, she doesn't have to worry about the whole "Oh no me and my family are gonna be in danger!" thing

It's a win win!

Overtime they basically become a second (or third for some people) family to eachother.

Damian becomes more 'kid like' and open to others,

Marinette becomes more confident and overall happier,

Jagged gets to hang out with his awesome niece and her 'maybe more than just a friend',

And Penny gets a new outlet for stress and has so many more crazy stories to tell people.

One day while she's in the living room on the sofa watching 'The AristoCats' Damian just barges into the room and dramatically flops over onto of her.

He just lays there with his head in her lap and the rest of his body sprawled on the couch.

After everything that has happened this is normal for them now.

Without asking any questions or talking at all they just watch the movie together with the occasional remark or quip between them.

Around half way through the movie Jagged kicks down the door, effectively scaring the crap out of the two teens, while Penny follows behind him with an apologetic look on her face.

At first Jagged was yelling about something having to do with'Fang' and 'Dragon' and 'Miraculous' but after taking in the domestic atmosphere of the room he just sits down on the floor and joins in on watching the movie.

Penny, shaking her head in both amusement and exasperation, sits down on another chair and does the same.

While combing through Damian's hair with her fingers Marinette looks around the room.

'My life can't get any more complicated, can it?'

Oh boy, she just jinxed it.

This is just an idea I've had bouncing around in my head for awhile and I couldn't resist the urge to write it out. I AM planning on making a part 2 so if you like this keep an eye out for that. I'm by no means a fast writer though so it will take a while. But then again not many people will probably read this soo.... Yeah.

Trans women are real women and this blog respects that

Batman: So what do you do?

Ladybug: I fight all the villains in Paris.

Batman: I've never heard of villains in Paris.

Ladybug: Yeah, cuz I do my job.

Dumb MDC Idea:

Nino/Adrien/Chloé sugar, Alya/Lila/class salt. Lukanette.

Nino breaks up with Alya after they get into a fight about Lila’s credibility, and he’s absolutely miserable, until he meets this girl, Emília at a music festival.

They start texting, and Nino’s friends keep on teasing him and asking him who she is and what she’s like etc.

Eventually, Nino tells them that they’re going on a first date!!! Precisely they’ve decided on this little café at 3pm next Saturday!

Marinette and Adrien want to make sure it goes smoothly, so a couple minutes after Nino and Emília walk into the café, they slip in as well, walking to the back so that Nino has his back to them and his date is in their line of sight, not too close that they’ll notice them but not too far that they’re out of ear shot.

10 minutes later, Luka walks in, and notices the two huddled in a corner trying not to be noticed. He walks over and when he gets to the booth, Marinette drags him down onto the bench and explains the situation.

Nino comes into school on Monday, talking about how fun his date was and how they’ve decided to do it again!!!

Luka, Marinette and Adrien all exchange eye contact...

They continue spying on Nino’s dates, making sure everything goes smoothly and cringing every time something goes wrong.

Eventually Chloé asks Adrien what’s going on and where he goes every Saturday. Adrien explains, and Chloé wants in.

So now there’s, Chloé, Luka, Adrien and Marinette all huddled around a booth every Saturday, spying and giggling over their friends love life. Invasive? Yes. Entertaining? Also yes. But they’re very happy that they haven’t been noticed yet.

Right?

One weekend, Emília arrives before Nino, and walks over to their booth.

Turns out she’s been noticing how they arrive at the same time as them, and always look suspicious-whats going on?

Marinette panics, and answers “WE’RE STARTING A FASHION BUSINESS!” “Really?” “YES-I’m head designer, Chloé and Luka are going to be models and Adrien’s PR?!”

Emília doesn’t buy it, but turns to leave anyway, only for Nino to arrive and walk over to the group, asking what their talking about.

His date explains “oh these lot are starting a fashion business!” Which Nino is surprised about, and is like “cool dudes, can’t wait to see what you come up with!”

The four are panicking, because either they

1) continue lying or

2) admit they’ve been spying on them

Neither of which they really want to do.

Until Chloé comes up with the idea of “why don’t we just make one? That way we won’t be lying, Marinette can start her own business, we all get work experience, and we might get some money out of it!”

They’re all a bit apprehensive, but um ok?!

And thus, MDC is born, all because they didn’t want to admit to Nino that they were spying on his love life...

So yeah that’s a dumb way for it to start up...

Not nearly enough “Sirius Black makes himself at home in Privet Drive because there’s nothing the Dursleys can do to get him to leave” fic out there, and it’s a crying shame.

Cité des Démons; Part 3

Summary: The Dupain-Chengs have had enough of Paris, they’re tired of their daughter being bullied by those she once called her friends. In an effort to escape the pain of Paris they move to the most crime ridden city in the world for a spice of something new.

Note: I changed the year things happened if you couldn’t tell. Instead of becoming Ladybug at thirteen it happened at the age of twelve. This part is Marinette explaining to the Bats (minus Barbara) about her past, what happened in Paris, and why she should help them.

Prologue | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

•••

Marinette had given both Bruce Wayne and Dick Grayson, otherwise known as Batman and Robin respectively, when she jumped off a building the first time only to have a yoyo appear at her side and used as a grappling hook. When they met on a roof a bit away she just laughed at their stunned faces, taking a bit of pride in it. The girl missed free running but Gotham wasn’t her territory and she wasn’t going back to Paris unless the Akumas come back. She seriously was having withdrawls when it came to the lack of a superhero identity. 

Keep reading

Science fiction is full of first contact stories, but is there a such thing as LAST contact?  Decide exactly what that means, and write about it.

Sister of the Bat

I love siblings!Brucinette, especially Marinette being the older sibling. (Maybe I am projecting as the eldest child and enjoy bullying younger brothers in general.)

So hear me out.

Marinette is adopted by the Waynes when Bruce is like 9 or so.

She is older by like 2 years and her parents died. Bruce's parents took pity on her and took her in.

Gina takes Marinette with her as she travels around after Tom and Sabine dies in an accident and one of their stops is the Wayne Manor because Gina is good friends with Alfred.

Thomas and Martha offer to adopt Marinette to give her a stable home life and Gina accepts.

Bruce acts very much like Damian and demands her to get out of the mansion and insists that she is not family, much to his parents' dismay. He refuses to acknowledge her as a sister.

Marinette at least tries to be nice and be friends with him but her wellspring of patience can dry up and she later starts to call him 'demon brat.'

Marinette was there the night outside the cinema. The two siblings got a little closer after it and at least, stopped fighting each other on a daily basis. Alfred wishes it didn't take Thomas's and Martha's death for the two to get along.

Deep down, Marinette blames herself for what happened that night because how else can you explain why everyone she sees as a parental figure dies. Bruce doesn't blame her though.

So fast forward to when Marinette is 14 and she goes on an exchange program to Paris to visit her hometown. It took a lot to convince Bruce to let her leave Gotham and promises to come home for the holidays.

Hawkmoth happens. Bruce figures out that she's Ladybug when she refuses to come home for the holidays and investigate why.

He comes to Paris to help. Alfred follows to keep an eye on the two and also wants to know what the situation is since he used to be a miraculous holder.

Alfred had a 'talk' with Fu about putting responsibilities of a city on the shoulders of one of his wards. He also nearly got akumatized when Marinette was made Guardian and had more responsibilities on her young shoulders but managed to calm down.

Hilarious scene I thought of. Alfred cocks his shotgun, threatening to shoot Su-Han when he shows up and fires a warning shot to make a point.

They stayed in Paris for 2 years. Moving into Marinette's old house when the exchange program ended.

Bruce gets tempted to use the earrings and ring to bring his parents back but ultimately doesn't upon finding out about the consequences.

Of course Bruce is going to get a miraculous. I was thinking the rooster or the dog. And the weapon is a boomerang. Oh wait, how about the horse. It sorta works?

Hawkmoth gets defeated. Gabriel goes to jail. Adrien gets his mother back. The Wayne siblings and Alfred move back to good old Gotham.

(I realized that this got longer than I expected.)

Time skip to a few years later, when Marinette goes to Tibet to be trained as a Guardian and Bruce follows her not long after to learn how to fight and figured the Temple was a good place to start.

After she finishes her Guardian training, they both travel around, sometimes going their separate ways and meeting up again once a few months. Marinette only sometimes trains with some of the masters Bruce was learning under, she mainly goes around looking for lost Miraculous and righting the balance in places.

Of course, Marinette gets on the first plane to Nanda Parbat to knock some sense into her dumb brother, the moment she found out that Bruce was training with the League of Assassins.

"Okay, I left you alone for a week and the next thing I know you are in the League of Assassins. THE LEAGUE OF ASSASSINS LED BY RA'S AL GHUL. What the hell were you thinking, Bruce?! Does Alfred know about this?"

"Well, it is the League of Assassins. Assassins, Mari. I need to know every form of fighting so I can be Batman."

"I am sorry. Bat-what?"

"Batman. The identity I created so I can fight in my crusade against crime."

"Right.... That totally makes sense. But why a bat? I thought you were scared of those. I literally hung pictures of bats in my room so you would stay out. I even made a bat plushie named Terry. You remember Terry, right?"

"Yes and I hated him. The point is, I chose a bat as a sign of overcoming my fear and using it as a symbol to strike fear in the hearts of my enemies and as a symbol of hope for the innocent."

"Did- Did you just.. have an answer ready for when people ask you why you are dressed as a bat furry?"

She stuck around to pester Bruce into quitting the league and simultaneously mess with Ra's at the same time.

She used magic to keep herself hidden and succeeded to stay that way until Bruce left.

She's also the reason why Bruce hates magic.

Marinette went back to Gotham first and set up a fashion empire.

Bruce comes back and starts being Batman.

Marinette at first tries very hard to respect Bruce's decision to do this mostly on his own. Until an incident where he got stabbed and instead of resting, he goes out.

So tired older sister Marinette puts on a black kelver suit with bits of red as a homage to her time as Ladybug, a domino mask with white lenses and a cape with a red hood (Hawkmoth had ruined cowls and she later changed it into a kelver jacket with a hood because despite the dramatic effect it brings, she was not great at jumping around rooftops with a cape which made Bruce takes great pride in showing off how great his cape is any chance he gets)

She went out to make sure Bruce doesn't get killed. (No miraculous because she doesn't want people coming to already crime-filled Gotham for them)

People called her 'Red Hood'. (Joker uses that alias because he wants to taunt the Bat after hearing rumours that 'Red Hood' was dead. Jason took it because it's the name of the one person who pisses Bruce off and gets under his skin more than anyone.)

Batman has that deep and gruff voice to disguise his voice while Red Hood uses magic to distort her voice enough that it was still understandable but drove shivers down people’s spines.

She was there first hand and managed to record a lot of failed or dramatic moments Batman has. Blackmail...

Bruce is stubborn. He tells her that he has everything handled while getting his ass kicked. Mostly he gets the villain of the week tied up in an hour and Marinette leaves to go deal with something else in another neighbourhood.

Not very often there are cases where Bruce is obviously very tired and needs help but is too stubborn to ask for it. Marinette asks if he needs help and he says no. She lets the fight go on for like 15 minutes, casually leaning against the railing or wall and in one case, eating chips and sharing it with a barely conscious henchman before asking him again. And joining the fight whether he said no or not.

-------

The nature of their relationship is questioned as they are seen together often enough.

That came to light when Penguin was dangling Red Hood above a death trap and threatened Batman that he was going to kill his girlfriend unless he met the demands.

“Ew…” “What the-. No!” “Gross. I would rather die, thank you very much.” “She’s my sister.” “My standards are way higher than that.”

“Oh. My apologies. But still the same sentiment. Do it or she dies.”

“No.” Batman answered.

“Kwamis, if this is about the cookies, I said I was sorry, Baby Brother.”

“The sign clearly said ‘Do not Touch.’”

The two clearly adult, usually serious and fearsome vigilante bicker like children.

Penguin cleared his throat after being frustrated at being ignored, “Hello, still here by the way. And I thought he was the older one.”

“He wishes.” Red Hood snorted, already freed and ready to kick some Penguin’s ass.

“Oh no.”

------

Joker thinks he is Batman’s arch nemesis. And for the longest time, was the only Gotham Rouge who has never faced Red Hood. (Marinette knows about the Joker but due to the circumstances and dislike for the man’s fashion choices, has never met the ‘Clown prince’ in person.)

But Joker doesn’t pay attention to frivolous gossip of the Gotham underworld much. So as far as he knows, there was only one vigilante in town and that was the Batman who is his equal and vice versa or so he thought.

That illusion was shattered, the moment another figure appeared from the shadows while Batman was busy trying to deactivate the bombs on the hostages.

“Yo, Demon-Brat, Need help?”

“No.”

“Who is this, Batsy? Your sidekick?”

Red Hood looked offended, “I find that very offensive.”

Batman sighed, “The bane of my existence.”

It was Joker’s turn to be offended. He puts on a hurt face, “But I thought I was your arch nemesis, Batsy. What about all those fun times we had?”

“Sorry, Jester. But me and Bats have a longer history.”

“It’s the Joker. You nitwit.”

“Nitwit? Come up with better insults, you second-grade clown. I have seen birthday clowns scarier than you. And it’s the green wire that you need to cut.”

“Who are you anyway?”

Red Hood took a bow. “The name’s Hood. Red Hood. I am here to make sure the Demon-Brat over there doesn’t get killed, dressed as a bat furry. Now, any last words?” She aimed her guns at the Joker.

“Oh. I think I will like you.”

[Fight scene as Batman frees the hostages and then, they fight the Joker together.]

As Joker is led into the car that will take him to Arkham Asylum, “I don’t like you.” He said as he glared at Red Hood.

------

Batman is working on his latest case in front of the Batcomputer when his phone rang from a number he wished never called.

He answered it.

“Hey, Bruce, I am going to be in town for the next few days. This is a heads-up, in case we ever ran into each other.”

“Understood. Is anyone new going to show up during your stay?”

“Maybe. That remains to be seen.”

“Tell me when it happens.”

A small laugh at the other end. “Same old Brucie.”

Alfred enters. “Is that Miss Marinette?”

“Hello, Alfred. Nice to know that you are well.”

“Miss Marinette, it would be nicer if you come by the manor. It’s rather empty without you.”

“I would love to, Alfred but my schedule is rather packed and I am pretty sure the manor is full of strays that Demon brat had brought home over the years.”

“They are not strays. They needed someone to train them properly and they agreed to be adopted.” Bruce still hasn’t figured out how he has so many kids. One day, it was just him and Dick and the next thing, kids come and go from his house. But he wasn’t going to let her know that.

“Sureee…”

“Miss Marinette, it’s been so long since we last saw you. I am confident that you and Master Bruce can remain civil for a few hours. Please come by.”

A short silence.

“Do it for me. Please.” Alfred added.

“For you Alfred, I will come over sometime in the afternoon tomorrow but I cannot promise anything else. Goodbye.”

“Good Day, Miss Marinette.”

---

The next morning, Bruce wasn’t in a good mood and the kids tried to figure out why. Bets on Jason or Damian.

Alfred on the other hand looked almost giddy with excitement, cleaning up the manor with a vigour.

When he was asked, he answered “Miss Marinette is back in Gotham. She’s coming over for a visit today.”

Dick and Jason seemed to understand what Alfred meant.

“Wait, she’s back. Does Bruce know she’s going to be here?”

“He and the Miss have agreed to be civil towards each other.”

“Well, I am going to the kitchen to make some popcorn. This is going to be good.” Jason said, gleefully rubbing his hands together as he walked away.

All the other kids looked confused. “Who’s Marinette?”

Dick answered,“She’s well...if there was anyone in the entire world who can drive Bruce mad, it’s her. I swear he came close to breaking the no-kill rule every time she visits. Last I heard she was in Australia.”

“Why does Father dislike her that much?” Damian asked.

“She was the original Red Hood.”

“I thought Jason stole that name from the Joker.” Tim scratched his head.

“Well, the Joker stole it from her to taunt B. When B started off, Batman had...um...a partner. This was way before my time. Her methods were a little conventional. She prioritizes the innocents but she broke the no-kill rule a few too many times. Nearly killed the Joker once.”

“So what happened?”

“They argued a lot. Fought nearly all the time. By the time B had Jason for like what? a year?, she moved out of Gotham and rarely came back. The last time was Jason’s fifteenth birthday before he died and we never heard back from her again, except for a few birthday presents”

“Why isn’t there any picture of her? Why have we never heard of her before?”

“Bruce likes to pretend that she doesn’t exist because...well... you’ll see.”

------

Jason to Dick later. “You didn’t tell them?”

“No. Would you tell them about her and Bruce?”

“I see your point. This is going to be epic. We are totally recording, right?”

“Way ahead of you. Cameras in nearly every angle of each room, plus hidden microphones for audio. Babs is making sure they are all in working order. Thank Bruce paranoia at times like this.”

Doorbell rings. “And Action.” Jason said as he and Dick took out their phones to get some first hand footage. Extra blackmail is always handy to have.

Alfred opens the door to reveal a woman in red, wearing sunglasses. Outside, a red and black motorbike was parked. Her hair was dark and hung loose down her back. She takes off her glasses to reveal bluebell eyes that held the same steely glint as Bruce but they softened at the sight of the old butler.

“Hey Alfred. Long time no see.” She warmly said as she hugged him.

“Miss Marinette. I must say that I miss having your charm around the manor.”

Seeing Dick and Jason in the hallway. “Boys, look at you. You have grown so much. Dick, I see you finally got rid of the mullet.(It wasn’t that bad, Dick said under his breath) Jason, see, I told you that you will get bigger than me one day.”

“Hey, M / Aunt Mari” They hug her.

“Jason.” Her tone changed and he froze, she sounded pissed. “You name stealer.”

“I wanted to make you proud. I was very mad at B back then and I thought why not use the name that pisses him off the most. And you were my favourite auntie.” He tried to explain himself. Maybe he should have asked her first before using her name.

Marinette thought about it for an antagonizing long time watching him squirm, “Hmm….Valid. In that case, you can be my successor.”

“Always knew I was your favourite nephew.”

“Hush, that’s our secret. Now where are all the other strays Brucie has.”

The other bat kids had appeared from where they were.

“Oh… are these the new strays that Brucie brought home over the years?”

“I am no stray. I am Father’s blood son and his heir. You will treat me as such, woman.”

Marinette mutters under her breath, “No doubt about it, you are Bruce’s son. Can’t believe that Demon brat actually got a kid with his DNA. I thought for sure that he was going to keep adopting kids with some resemblance to him.” Jason laughs.

“I am Tim. And the Demon spawn over there,” He gestured towards said kid, “is Damian.” At the nickname, she raised an eyebrow and looked at Dick. He nodded. She chuckled.

The excited blond woman hugged her next, “Hi, I am Stephanie, unlike the others, I came in and never got adopted.”

“Smart girl.”

Stephanie pointed towards Cass, “and this is Cass. She doesn’t talk much.” Cass settles for a wave.

“I am Duke. The family’s newest addition.”

“The only ones not here are Babara, Harper, Colin and Kate.”

“Kate as in Kate Kane?”

“The one and only.”

“Oh. I have to meet up with her at some point.”

“Come on now. Let’s not loiter in the hallway. I am sure Miss Marinette would like some tea. And remember your promise.”

“I promise my best.”

“I hope your best is enough. Master Bruce is currently in the study.”

“Great. I don’t have to deal with his annoying face.”

They moved to the living room. Marinette, Jason and Dick catch up on what happened over the years. Mostly on Jason’s and Dick’s part.

Bruce finally comes down the stairs and the room falls silent. The atmosphere suddenly felt thick and hard to breathe, the moment the two made eye contact with each other.

“Marinette. You are still here.”

“Disappointed, Demon Brat?”

Everyone looked shocked, except for Dick and Jason who had started recording on their phone the moment Bruce showed up.

Marinette stood up with folded arms and a murderous glare on her face when she saw what Bruce was wearing. Bruce on the other hand smirked, wearing clothes that clashed terribly and was an absolute eyesore, especially to a fashion designer’s eye.

WTF was happening???? Was running through most of the bat kids’ heads.

“You are doing this on purpose. You are trying to piss me off.”

“You started it by not leaving the moment the amount of time warranted for a visit has passed.”

“I didn’t come here to see you. I came here for Alfred and stayed for them.” She pointed her thumb in the kids’ direction. “You should have stayed in your little man cave, Bats.”

“How about you scurry back to Europe where you belong, Bug, before I eat you.”

“Aw...Look at the cute baby bat, baring his non-existent fangs.”

“I am a full-grown man. You onesie wearing imposter.”

“I was thirteen year old! Thirteen! If we are going to rip each other’s first suits, then let’s talk about that fashion disaster you wore when you first started out. That cape was a walking hazard, much less be used to run around rooftops. It’s a miracle that you can still walk after that accident. And the ears. You looked like a fucking Rabbit.”

“You are one to talk. That cloak incident in the winter gala of- .”

“That doesn’t count. I only fell down because you stepped on it. If memory serves, you embarrassed yourself in front of Miss Kyle by falling face first into the fountain and ran away from the gala, that same day.”

The insults and jabs went on and on. Stories full of blackmail were exchanged.

Jason and Dick are delighted at the blackmail material and grinning like maniacs.

The rest were still in shock at Bruce’s behaviour. This is way different from the Brucie Wayne persona and a far cry from the stoic Batman.

“Face it, Baby brother. You can’t just admit that I am wayyy better than you.”

‘Baby Brother’, Tim mouthed. He looked at the two eldest for answers but were of no help as they try to capture the best angle for their video.

He vaguely remembers the name Red Hood appearing in the news along with Batman and Robin and there being a second Wayne when he was younger.

He thought that they would be exes or something that worked together but the sibling rivalry in front of him made so much sense now.

“I can beat you in a fight any day, Brucie.”

“Well, I am Batman.”

“And I have been doing this hero shtick since I was 13. So weapons or no weapons?”

“No weapons. Alfred won’t appreciate new scratches in the living room. Freestyle, all out brawl, first one pinned or knocked out loses. right here, right now. No hitting the face or between the legs.” He said, taking off his silver glittery suit jacket.

“I like the sound of that.” She said as she took off her red coat and got into a fighting stance. “Give me all you got, demon brat.”

Dick and Jason made sure to clear out the room and continued filming from the stairs.

“She’s like our aunt?” Tim asked.

“Adopted. Like us.” Jason grinned, as Marinette got cornered and did a flip to get out “I like to think that the adoption genes from Thomas and Martha were passed down to B and doubled to explain why there are so many of us.”

“Why has Father never mentioned her to us before?”

“Would you talk about us to your pets if we were living far and far away?” Dick asked.

“You and maybe Cass and Thomas. The rest of you. No. I wouldn’t. You make a good point, Richard.”

The two siblings downstairs had abandoned fighting the proper way and were wrestling on the ground like five years old.

“Master Bruce. Miss Marinette. I expected better from both of you. You are supposed to set a good example for the children.” Alfred had arrived.

They both stopped and broke apart, looking sheepish under Alfred’s disappointed gaze.

“Sorry Alfred.” They both apologised and glared at each other.

“I guess I miss you,” Marinette said first, “Demon Brat.”

“You weren’t miss as much, Imposter.”

Alfred cleared his throat. The two siblings sighed.

“I am sorry for calling you an Imposter and that was very rude of me.” Bruce ‘apologised’ like he had recited that particular sentence too many times.

“I am sorry too for calling you a Demon Brat despite the accuracy of the statement and I endeavour to do less of it in the future, Bruce.”

“Well since dinner is nearly ready, both of you clean up the mess and come to the dining room.”

“Alfred, I really can’t stay-” Marinette started.

“You are staying, Miss Marinette. It has been years since you were here.”

“Fine, because I love your cooking nothing else and Brucie better change his clothes.”

“No.” Bruce replied childishly.

------

At the dinner table,

“So Aunty M, can I call you that?” Tim asked.

“It’s fine. What do you want to ask?”

“I heard you and Bruce talking about magical butterflies in Paris and you starting your um hero career when you were 13 because of it.”

“Oh.” Marinette’s hand on her fork tensed a little. “Wasn’t expecting that but I can see why you are curious.”

“Now that I thought about it, you never told Jason and me the entire story about it.” Dick said.

“You are right. It’s more of the entire incident left too heavy of a mark for me to talk freely about it.”

Bruce looked her with worry in his eyes, “M, you don’t have to say anything you don’t want to.”

Marinette took a bite first while she gathered her thoughts first. “When I was 13 years old, I went on a student exchange program to Paris so I can learn more about my home town….”

She told them about Hawkmoth and the magical earrings she received. The responsibility of the entire city that came with it.

“You don’t sound happy about having magic powers.”

“Well, it happens when you are a just kid with already enough trauma on her plate from four parents dying in front of her. Then, you get chosen to be a hero by some old man just because you decided to be a decent human being and help him cross the street. I repeat, chosen, no training, no information on what exactly was going on. Dropped some magic earrings. which the bad guy clearly wants, into the hands of a child and pushed her out the door to fight in a long tiring war. He got amnesia halfway through the entire thing and left for London. I was young back then but didn’t know any better. At first, it was really fun. Then... If Bruce wasn’t so stubborn and stayed in Gotham like I wanted him to, I might have came out of it way worse.” Her voice was soft as she seemed lost in some painful memories.

“I already lost my parents. I didn’t want to lose another family.” Bruce said.

Marinette smiled, “Yeah. I am thankful for your help. I couldn’t keep you out of superheroing if I tried and Alfred and I tried a lot.”

A few of the Batkids sent smirks towards Bruce to remind him of how they got adopted.

“So how did Bruce help you out?”

“Well, he was more of the Oracle in the situation, tracking down Hawkmoth. Alfred and me kept him from going out, no matter how much he wanted to join the fights. But…” Marinette smirked and Bruce stiffened as he realized what she was going to do.

Marinette moved forward and ‘whispered’, “You should know that you kids aren’t the only ones who parkoured around rooftops in brightly coloured bird-themed suits in your preteens.”

“No way...The Batman was like your Robin?!”

Bruce dropped his face into his hands. “Mari, stop.” He hissed.

“What? I am simply enlightening the children on their heritage.”

Alfred comes in to take away the plates, “I also recall the young Master sneaking out many times to accompany you on your night patrols.”

“Alfred!”

“Nearly forgot about that. There are times where he followed me in his pjamas and a table cloth as a cape when he can’t find where I hid the Miraculouses. Can’t keep him down even when he got sick and was loopy from the medication.”

“Is this the same Mr. Lecture-us-for-not-wearing-our-proper-uniform-when-we-patrol and sneaking out to patrol?”

“One time, I got sick so Bruce wore the earrings to be Ladybug and he had this entire speech prepared for when he take down an akuma that he did in front of the mirror.”

“I thought that you were asleep.” Bruce mumbled in embarrassment.

“You aren’t as quiet and sneaky as you thought you were. Also Chat showed me the video of you taking the akuma down and how he found you when you were practicing the yo-yo.”

“He what?!”

“I also told him to sent it to Alya.”

“No!” Bruce stood up and hurried towards the Batcave. “How did I know about this?”

“Who’s Alya?”

“My reporter friend. Back in the day, she ran the Ladyblog, where she posted information and videos about akuma attacks.”

“So you are saying that there is a video of a tiny Bruce in a red with black polka dot suit, running around Paris on the Internet.”

“I think there are a few featuring him in his Chick-lad suit too. It was the cutest thing ever. Wanna see?”

“Aren’t you worried about him deleting the blog off the internet?” Tim asked as Marinette looked through her phone.

“My brother may be good at hacking but he can’t reach the level of Max Kante who made an AI at fourteen and coded the Ladyblog. Besides, Alya has back-ups and I have back-ups too. Mostly footages of Chick-lad in action.”

“Show us.” they all demanded.

------

In the next JL meeting,

“So regarding the problem in the-” Batman was saying as the presentation screen blacked out.

“On it.” Cyborg said as he got up to make it work again but the screen flickered back on before he can do anything.

‘Batman.’ A voice that suspiciously sounded like Nightwing narrated as clips of Batman fighting on the streets of Gotham, driving the Batmobile, facing off many Gotham Rouges and posing with the other Justice League members played. ‘The Dark Knight of Gotham. The Caped Crusader. Thought to be smartest and most dangerous member of the Justice League.’

‘But all heroes made their start somewhere...’

A news clip played showing Paris being wrecked by an akuma and Nadja reporting the scene. English subtitles are inserted for those who don’t understand French. Most of the members are confused as Batman felt horror beginning to set in. He might not be able to show his face to the other heroes again after this stunt his children had pulled.

The camera zoomed in on the girl in red and black fighting the orange-skinned person with a rope weapon of some sort. Wonder Woman gasped as she recognised a Ladybug user. Then, a younger boy with yellow and red feather designs, slammed into the akuma. The video paused right before the boy made impact with his mouth wide open. A circle is drawn around the boy dressed as a rooster? and an arrow pointed towards him with the words ‘Batman, aged 11’ next to it. ‘Former alias: Chick-lad’ was under it.

Red Hood’s voice was soon heard. ‘This is the infamous Dark Knight in his humble beginning. Before Gotham, there was Paris. The city of Love had dark days upon it. The young boy took up the mantle of Chick-lad and fought the demons that plagued the cities in a rather startling bright yellow. He fought alongside Ladybug who is most known for being the leader of the team that lead the charge. But we are not focusing on her right now. We are going to show you the brave chicken who had feathers on his suit.’

“No. No. No.” Bruce said as he desperately tries to turn the documentary or whatever it was off. Green Arrow and Green Lantern had began recording on their phones. Superman tried not to laugh at his friend. Cyborg looked like he can’t comprehend the boy on the screen was the same dark, not as intimidating anymore, figure in front of him.

Cue clips of Chick-lad in action and dramatically saying a lot of cheesy one-liners and puns as he try to take down akumas by himself with his bow and arrows, much to Ladybug’s visible frustration. Some horrible attempts at trick shots with the bow.

Videos of Ladybug scolding a self-satisfied but bloody Chick-lad on irresponsibly using his powers to tie up citizens for simple crimes like littering.

------

An amused Ladybug filming herelf,

“Hi, Ladybug here, on the 17th June of 19**, Robin Hood over there decided that he was going to see how many cars he can carry.” (LB calls Chick-lad Robin Hood as a nickname in the suits because of the bow.)

Camera switches to said hero under a bus and 5 cars, struggling to hold it up.

“On a good day, he can’t lift 100lbs for two minutes. But with the added Miraculous strength we can lift more than a ton for over an hour. Let’s add more and see what the limit is, shall we?”

“Ladybug, no. Help me. I can’t carry it anymore.”

“No..*Laughs* oh shit. Wait. Hang on. I am coming. Don’t you dare drop that. The Miraculous Ladybug is not for fixing the things you broke.”

Scene Cut.

A masked boy in a black cat suit was filming this time. “Bonjour, beautiful City of Lights, Chat Noir here, LB is taking medical leave due to her illness but her replacement is filling in the meantime and unfortunately, he’s not..the best with the yo-yo.”

The camera move to show Chick-lad in a red and black form-fitting suit with some armour. He was suspended in mid-life, tangled up with strings and hanging from what looks like the structure of the Eiffel Tower like a bug trapped in a spider web. He was furiously trying to get free but gets more tangled up in the strings.

“Paris is doomed.” Chat Noir deadpanned before asking, “Should I be getting LB, little chick?”

“No. Do not get my sister. I told her that I can handle Paris while she is incacipated and I will....once I get out of these stupid things.”

“Don’t diss the yo-yo. It did nothing to you.”

“It’s a horrible choice for a weapon. Bows and arrows are way better.”

-----

Green Arrow laughed, “I have to get a recording of that.”

Batman had given up trying to turn the thing off (he cursed his decision to make the screen battery-powered so it didn’t turn off when he pulled the plug) and was face-down on the table with sympathetic pats from Wonder Woman while she fan-girled in the moments when Ladybug is on screen.

Flash had gone and gotten popcorn for everyone.

-----

Someone filming Chick-lad as he taunts the akuma and evading its attacks until a yo-yo wrapped around him and pulled him out of the akuma’s range. The camera followed his trajectory. There was a pissed Ladybug on a nearby rooftop, now holding Chick-lad by the back of his suit.

“CHICKEN-LAD FOGHORN LEGHORN THOMAS WA- BUG. You are in so much trouble.”

“There was an akuma.” He weakly said

“You were grounded by Al and I can handle the akuma.”

“Well, Ladybug.” The akuma said, “Prepare to be-”

“Shut it. Can’t you see that I am talking to this little superhero here who is supposed to be at home because he is grounded?” The akuma obeyed and awkwardly stood around.

“Al was worried when you disappeared. Stop being so reckless, you piece of drumsticks.”

“This is rich coming from the girl who lets herself get eaten by a T-Rex.”

“It was part of the plan and you mister are going home right now.”

“No.”

“Do it or you ain’t getting any of Al’s snickerdoodles.”

“Fine.”

-----

“Hey, Robin Hood! Whatcha thinking about?”

Chick-lad was in a familiar pose of Batman when he is in his brooding mood.

He didn’t look up, ignoring his sister. Ladybug placed an egg under him as the camera shakes from suppressed giggles.

“Are you brooding again? I swear it’s hard to...no way.” Ladybug said in faux surprise.

This got Chick-lad’s attention. “What?”

“There’s an egg under you. How is there an egg up here?!”

The tiny hero stood up, “Har Har, no way I am falling for that... Holy shit, that’s an egg. How is it here?”

“Unless…”

Chick-lad looked horrified. “No…I mean there is no feasible way that I..”

“You laid an egg!”

“No no no no….nuh uh...I did not lay an egg.”

“I mean you brood all the time and the pro-long use of the Miraculous does give certain characteristics to our human bodies.”

“Your weird craving of aphids is a way different territory than me laying an egg. I laid an egg, Ladybug! I can’t do that. I am a healthy male Rooster.”

“That’s your own child you are talking about.”

“I am not ready to be a father.” (The caption ‘said the man who proceeds to adopt a gazillion children’ appeared under Chick-lad.)

“Well, what do we do with it?” Chick-lad asked as he tentatively picked the egg up.

“We could eat it. Omelet for breakfast sounds good.” Ladybug suggested.

“No. We are not going to eat my kid.” “So you decided to be a responsible father, then, little brother.”

Chick-lad caressed the egg like it was a precious baby, “Help me hide it from Alfred. I will do anything.”

“Deal.”

Screen cut to a dark screen like a camera was hidden inside a bag.

“-ONE WEEK! THAT’S SEVEN DAYS, 168 HOURS, 10080 MINUTES OR 604800 SECONDS!”

Someone was laughing very hard.

“THAT’S HOW LONG YOU WATCHED ME BABY THAT FAKE EGG AND MADE ME THINK I WAS THE FATHER. FOR AN ENTIRE WEEK, YOU WATCHED ME SING LULLUBIES AND TELL STORIES TO IT.”

“Fatherhood suited you.”

“I CAN’T BELIEVE THAT YOU EVEN GOT ALFRED IN ON IT!!! ALFRED!”

“He thought this might make you learn to be more responsible. And hush you don’t want to wake up little Eggbert.”

“You are the worst.”

Ladybug cackles, “I know.”

------

The compilation lasted 20 minutes before it ended with a side-by-side comparisons of the various poses by Chick-lad, next to a Batkid trying to recreate it.

Batman stood up with every shred of dignity he still had left, “None of you will breathe a word about what happened today.” and walked out of the room.

“How is it after being embarrassed like that he manages to still scare me?”

There are a few inside jokes made from that ‘presentation’. Phrases like ‘the chicken grew up to be a bat’ baffled other members’ who didn’t see it. Until Oliver and Hal did a movie night and showed them the video that Oracle emailed them.

Ollie got a recording of a young Bruce saying “Bow and arrows are better.” in French on his phone. It’s one of the phrases in French that he knows. He says it everytime Batman has a disagreement with him. (Bruce once took out a custom bat-bow and arrows in a meeting and did an awesome archery trick that narrowly missed Green Arrow by a millimetre and proceeds to say that his skills are ‘rusty’.)

Later, he would tell newbie heroes that Batman once said, “C'est un choix d'armes horrible. L'arc et les flèches sont meilleurs.” and that means, “It’s a horrible choice of weapons. Bow and arrows are better.” in French. Bruce walked by once and told the newbie that it was taken out of context and that the horrible weapon in question was a yo-yo.

Wonder Woman passed her number to Batman to give it to Ladybug in front of everyone.

“Hey, Supes, who’s that?”

“It’s Batman’s sister, apparently. Used to be a superheroine with some magic earrings about twenty years ago. And those earrings used to belong to Diana’s mother.”

“Batman has a sister? And there’s two of them?”

-----

Stephenie had tried to fight crime with a yo-yo. It went horribly for everyone involved.

Damian asked to spar with Marinette before she left. She beats him with a custom yo-yo since she rarely uses the Miraculous nowadays. She left it for Damian as a very late or early birthday present.

Damian had trained himself to use it as a weapon since if his aunt can do it, so can he and carries it around because it has benefits like ‘it’s a toy, Father. It’s to entertain myself in that boring prison they call school.’

He also learned how to do tricks with it. He took down some would-be kidnappers with the yo-yo as Damian Wayne. (Stephanie was jealous of how good Damian was and asked him to teach her.)

------

Marinette and Bruce finally made up (skipping over the angst plot) and there were more visits from Aunty M. She does turn down being a vigilante again, choosing to focus on her new role as co-CEO of Wayne Enterprise to lighten the load but made a special appearance on a very busy night.

“Eddie! How are you? I see you are still doing purple on green.”

That voice. Whoever said that Batman was scarier one was wrong. The OG Red Hood was the one who plagues his nightmares to this day.

The Riddler turned around, hoping he was wrong. The rumours said that she was dead. But dying meant nothing to the Bats since the second Robin came back to life and was the current Red Hood.

There was a chilling sound of metal against concrete walls. “Eddie…”

“You can’t be real. You can’t.” His men were looking at him like he had gone mad. They had never seen their boss this terrified before. A few older ones from the early days dropped their weapons and run off.

Out of the shadows, a figure in red stepped out and the metal of her gun glinted under fluorescent light.

“I left Gotham for a nice vacation and what do I see after 5 years of absence? Idiots like you who still pairs green with purple.”

Riddler gets on his knees and began begging for mercy. Riddler’s goons get knocked out by the other bats as OG Red Hood tore into his fashion choices.

-----

“I mean I don’t get why people is getting so worked up over this new Red Hood.” A newbie henchman said.

“There’s another one? Did the current up and one die again?” Penguin asked.

“No. I think they are sharing the name. The old one is still around but there’s another one with the same name. She’s the one without a helmet and wears an actual red hood. I heard rumours that she has a voice of a demon, literally. They also say that Riddler surrendered himself when she showed up on the scene. You okay, boss?” he asked a very pale Penguin.

“She’s back. I thought she left for good. Batman probably welcomed her back with open arms if she is back on the streets catching the likes of us. Pack your bags, boys. We are moving out of Gotham.”

“Why? And where to, boss?”

“Anywhere but here.”

“Come on, Boss. She’s just another Bat. More work for us but we can handle her.”

“You fools. That woman is the Red Hood. The Original before there were any Robins working for Batman. When the name Batman was nothing more than a myth, a bogeyman for criminals, she was Bloody Mary story. Say her name three times and she will show up to hunt you down. The Red Hood you know now is great at catching criminals yes but she is the predator and we are the prey. She will stop at nothing, I repeat nothing to catch us. With Batman, he will let us get away to save the innocents. With her, I once left her with a ticking time bomb stuck to several hostages and got on a train to Chicago. Do you know who I saw when the train pulled into the station? She was standing on the platform, with that red hood over her head, waiting for me.”

“Aren’t you a little old for campfire stories, Oswald?” The voice asked with amusement from behind him. The same voice that had Riddler screaming for the hills. Penguin turned very pale.

“You are not getting me this time.” Penguin snarled as he called for his men and activated the bomb under his club.

“None of that now.” She grabbed the remote and de-activated the bomb. She then grabbed his collar and put a gun to his head.

“You remember what happened to the old Black Mask the last time I was here, right? When Batman was less tolerant of people breaking his no-kill rule. I will make you join him if you don’t call off your men and give me the information I came here for. I will even spare you from paying for your medical bills if you cooperate nicely and turn yourself back into Arkham.”

Penguin agreed, begging for his life.

The Outlaws Helps out JL