Guessyourenottheone - Gem

time isn't real and everything is happening and has already happened all at once. so basically you have already shifted and are shifting as we speak. you've shifted millions and billions of times. even if you don't remember it happening, it has already happened. you are already in your dr

Most of us will never know the agony of being a parent that does everything to provide for their child, only to keep coming up empty. Of the immense suffering and self-loathing that comes with being responsible for this little life, and feeling like you're failing: to keep them safe, warm, sheltered, fed. Of holding your child, your toddler, your newborn, watching them slowly waste away from that relentless, gnawing hunger you can't stop (one that you feel yourself). Watching as they howl in pain, and the hollowness that comes when your child becomes too weak even to do that. All the while being totally helpless to stop it because it's not up to you.

Most of us will only see the aftermath of such a thing: a parent carrying the far-too-light shroud of their child, pictured under a headline that details how starvation has taken hold of some given population. Distant and removed from us.

Except that it isn't. There are so many desperate parents who've run out of options, for whom this isn't some abstraction, who are asking—begging—us for our help. Just so they'll be able to buy some of the shit canned food left from the last aid delivery, and a couple loaves of bread to feed their children with. Extortionately pricey because of scarcity, but it's enough to keep their children in a state of "acute malnutrition" rather than "catastrophic hunger", so they'll pay anything for it.

Attacks on NGOs & prevention of aid into Gaza puts every single person there at risk of a slow death due to starvation. Especially children, like Samah's newborn baby boy, her little 2 year-old girl, and their big sister (who's only 9). But we can help. What's pocket money for us, is an invaluable lifeline to parents like Samah. At a time when so many seem to have decided to live in an alternate universe in which deliberate starvation and mass slaughter of civilians is acceptable, we have to do what we can to oppose it. Not to push it away, to ignore it, to decide it's been going on so long we don't care or that it's hopeless so give up, but to grit our teeth, dig our heels in, and say "no, seriously, what the fuck are we doing here?"

tldr: donate to Samah so she can buy food for her kids so they don't starve to death. please. and thank you. :)

(vetted by association by @/bilal-salah0 (relatives), & Bilal was vetted here, #132)

sorry about this, tagging for reach, but let me know if you'd like off

@cozy2000 @orphetoon @catgirl-kaiju @dykentery @ossifer

@crusty @libelelle @coastalhorrors @tenderscience @tiercel

@borrelia @nvtxl @nonbinary-watanuki @bigandgreedy

@verdiesque @6oys @metamorphesque

@eremes @whatcoloristhatcat @waterloggedsoliloquy @antisocialxconstruct @mirrorhouse

@gothhabiba @capybara @femmesbians @specialmouse @s9sh9

@jesse-pinko @leechloach @dadpilled @gojobait @thedyke

@c-rberus @ilovenanu @mlm-blues @void-flesh @stellarfalls

@queerpyracy @lakesbian @bitegore @u3pxx @crtvirus

@d-druxy @pornogrind @rubyfunkey @muscosus

@hexhomos @soymikki @spoiled-ojousama @rosamundpkes

This is Rafah which the occupation army is preparing to enter and these small square-shaped plots are the tents of the displaced and they contain more than a million displaced people,reality on the ground is much worse than it appears from above,as there is no greater suffering..

Things that I simply LOVE 𝜗𝜚˚⋆

lacy bras and pretty lingerie

oatmeal and HOT coffee on rainy days

layering perfumes

putting notes and annotations in books

coming up with code names for the guys that we are talking to

writing letters to my friends even though we talk daily

making playlists for every occasion but its all just Lana

starting chats with "GIRL" to signal urgency

big earrings and too many bracelets

hosting brunch and dinner at my place

shitposting on main

trying a new makeup and actually liking the result

wearing sweats and a bra as my at-home fit

seeing results when dieting and working out

boy gossip after long days of studying lmao

posting ig stories and yapping

making tumblr gifs of myself

decorating for holidays way too early

going to the store and smelling every scented candle until I find the perfect one

same for the tea section. I love tea.

being asked where my clothes are from

when I smile at old people and they smile back

the feeling of your brain being slow and numb after a good study session

staying up to talk to my girls

doing my skincare after a day of not wearing makeup

floortime

having a cold and therefore not feeling guilty for being lazy (unfortunately, I am a workaholic)

tiktok tarot readings that feed into my delusions

these are just things that I PERSONALLY love, and if you get it, were besties. <3

my insta -> @ malusokay

just found out that there is a sudanfunds website! like gazafunds, it is a compilation of funds for people facing genocide

Sugar Hits. // Elijah Hewson X Reader! (Fluff)

request: maybe you could write something like reader supporting Eli at a concert or something. Like, he's nervous about playing the new songs (your house, eddie in the Darkness) because he doesn’t know if the fans will like them and reader just comforts him before and after the show.

words: 2K.

That wasn’t your first gig of theirs. By the end of their last tour, you were already close with Eli and had really started to enjoy that "rockstar girlfriend" side of things. You managed to enjoy them more, and it felt good to have them back. As you walked down the hallway, Bobby spotted you, greeting you in his usual down-to-earth manner. He pulled you into a quick hug that made you feel a little guilty—it had been a while since you’d seen him, even though you didn’t live that far from each other. You exchanged a few words, catching up on your lives briefly, but then he noticed your eyes wandering around the room and shared something that had been on your mind.

 "Eli's with Josh, sorting out something about the soundcheck," he said with a smile. You returned it, but it was a shy, almost embarrassed grin, worried that Bobby might think you weren’t paying attention.

 "It's all good; I bet he's missing you too," he teased, bumping his shoulder against yours before letting you know he had to go meet up with the others. Your cheeks flushed, and it was funny how, even though almost a year had passed since the last gig you’d attended, you still felt like an outsider. Not because they treated you that way—in fact, it was quite the opposite. They always made you feel welcome, part of it all. But you understood this was their moment, their time together.

 You waved at a few familiar faces as you made your way to a quieter balcony, finding solace in the semi-isolation. Eli always knew how overwhelming those spaces could be for you, especially after a long time. He always made sure his hotel room was organized with thoughtful touches—handpicked playlists, your favorite snacks—so you could have a retreat when the chaos got too much. This time was no different. He’d texted you the room number and even let the front desk know you'd be stopping by. If you didn’t already know that Eli needed you more this time than you needed a quiet place to recharge, you would’ve gone straight there. Usually, you’d take a short nap, listen to some good music, and breathe in his scent that lingered on the pillows, comforting you before heading back to watch him perform.

  “I thought you'd take longer.” His tone was sharper than usual, the words fading into the atmosphere, his voice growing weaker. His eyes, tired yet still shining with a soft light, were fixed on you as you sat with a cigarette in hand. The night before, you’d stayed on the phone with him until he finally fell asleep—though it took a while. Eli masked it well, the calm tone in his voice, the gentle look on his face, and eyebrows that showed no sign of concern. But you knew his chest was heavy with worry.

 That phone call had mostly been filled with quiet, just the comfort of having each other there. But he had briefly confessed his anxiety about singing the new songs, how his mind kept spiraling into everything that could go wrong. You knew him well, knew you could remind him how amazing he was and offer rational solutions, but he’d already tortured himself enough over the past week. So, instead, you listened, letting him pour it all out, hoping it would make him feel lighter, even though it was painful to hear someone you loved, someone so capable, talk that way about themselves and their work.

 "You're doing great, El," you had whispered, your own throat tight, fighting the urge to cry, praying he'd understood you, even though your voice had come out so softly. And here you were again, saying the same thing, in the same quiet tone, after a six-hour flight because of your work, as he rested his forehead against your shoulder and melted into your arms.

 His body was cold, muscles tense, and you wished this would all pass soon so he could see how well everything was going to turn out.

 "I need you."

 "Well, here I am, huh?" His back was resting against the balcony railing, legs spread slightly with you standing in front of him so that you were at eye level, close. Your fingers combed through his hair, which still held defined curls, and you peppered soft kisses on his cheek. He wasn’t one to easily show his emotions, but just having you there, all your gentle touches, made him feel better. He nodded as your delicate hands cupped his face, helping you see him more clearly. His tired eyes met yours, and you gave him a light smile, trying to lift his spirits. 

 "You've done this before, haven't you?" you teased him gently. His hands rested on your waist, pulling you closer. He tilted his head, wearing a stern expression, clearly weighing the situation in his mind. "I know, I'm being an id—" you cut him off, pressing your lips to his. Surprised, he gripped you tighter, but gradually relaxed as you felt the tension ease from his muscles, bit by bit. He kissed you back, a soft, relieved sigh escaping into the kiss.

 You squeezed his shoulder through his black leather jacket—a piece he’d only wear for show since he always took it off mid-gig. He made more room for you to deepen the kiss. You could taste your lip gloss, and he had the familiar hint of mint candy on his lips, but nothing compared to the warmth that filled you as his scent wrapped around you, making you feel at home. You pulled back slightly to look at him. His eyes were still closed, and he gave you a few more soft kisses. Before he could speak, you murmured, “Only I can talk like that about my boyfriend. Anyone else? Not a chance.” He laughed, more relaxed now, his cheeks and lips red.

 "Everything’s gonna be okay, El. You’ve done this before, and it went fine. You’re not going to disappoint anyone. Your fans are here because they love your work. I’m not dismissing how you feel, just saying you’re worrying over nothing, love." He nodded, and while it didn’t completely lift the weight from his shoulders, it felt like having that so-called voice of reason gently soothe his mind.

 "Can you stay visible today?" The tip of his nose was pink, and his curls nearly covered his caramel eyes in supplication, but you didn’t mind. You usually stayed to the side of the stage, not wanting to be in the way, but this time it was different. "Of course, I’ll be there." He smiled, grateful, pulling you into his chest and holding you even tighter. You nestled into him, knowing you’d stay like that for a good while, arms wrapped around his waist. It felt even better than being in his hotel room—it was perfect.

…

 Your back ached slightly, the exhaustion of just standing was starting to catch up. It had been a long flight, and you hadn't slept, but it was worth it. The lights dimmed, the crowd roared, and the thrill of seeing them live again was unmistakable. It was busier than last time, and it felt so good to see them getting the recognition they deserved. As the first chords played, the atmosphere was electric. Eli glanced at you every now and then, a warm smile on his face. You found yourself jumping and cheering for him, just like you did when you were beside the stage, though you always felt a bit embarrassed doing it in front of him. But it was impossible not to.

 The first new song started, the silence filling with Eli’s steady voice, and he kept looking at you more frequently. You reassured him with your gaze. It was your first time hearing the new tracks in their entirety—the lyrics, the instrumentation—and you were so proud of him. As the next few songs, also new, played, you could see him loosening up, interacting with the crowd even though they weren’t singing along. Everything went smoothly.

 As the show ended, a few fans stopped you on your way out. You felt a bit bad for standing in front of people who had paid to be there, so you made an effort to talk to them. It was awkward because their excitement was meant for Eli, and you weren’t as natural in these moments as he was. But you didn’t want to seem rude. They were enthusiastic, and you ended up asking what they thought so you could pass it along to him. They shared their love for the performance, and you told them it was your first time hearing the new songs too. It was a brief exchange, though your nerves made it feel longer.

 As the fans thinned, Eli eventually stepped in, taking their attention off you. He placed a hand on your back, sharing in their excitement as he spoke to them. He knew you’d disappear from the conversation if given the chance, and it always amused him—he understood. You loved how attentive he and the band were in moments like this, always so considerate. You hated the thought of interrupting his time with fans, so you stood back, watching him chat and take photos, all smiles and joy.

 He had been so nervous he hadn’t slept, but seeing him like this, radiant and confident, you knew he was being ridiculous. He was perfect.

…

 You found yourself distracted, chatting with Lewis while waiting for the boys to come back so you could head to the hotel. The room filled with laughter as Eli's arms suddenly wrapped around you, lifting you off the ground and giving you a playful scare. You turned to face him, and there he was, beaming as if he had never been worried at all, and you threw your arms around him as he picked you up again.

 "I'm so proud of you. It was amazing," you whispered just for him. His eyes sparkled, hair now a mess. He was drenched in sweat, his white tank top almost transparent. "I love you so much, you know that?" he said, his voice softer than usual. You nodded, feeling the warmth rush to your cheeks. Then, he rubbed his damp hair against your face, making you laugh out loud, which made him laugh too. There was never any doubt he loved you—it wasn’t something he said all the time, but when he did, it filled you with buzzing bubbles.

 "Do I know this one?" he teased, running his fingers over the buttons of your brown vest that matched your boots. He’d noticed your outfit during the gig, appreciating that you always made an effort for their shows. It was something casual and routine for him, and now for you too. You could’ve easily shown up in something more comfortable, and he wouldn’t mind—he’d understand, especially since you’d come straight from the airport. But the fact that you took the time to choose something, thinking about what to wear and anticipating the gig, meant a lot to him. Even after seeing them live so many times, you still made it special.

 "I got it a few weeks ago," you replied, happy he noticed. "Saved it for tonight. Figured it deserved something special." He chuckled, resting his hand on your waist as he gave you a little twirl. "Your eyes too," he said, cupping your cheeks for a closer look. "You’re stunning." He stared at your black eyeliner.

 You smiled, closing your eyes as his thumb traced gentle circles on your jaw. "I told you," you whispered, bringing the conversation back to earlier. He kissed your nose, then your lips, finally accepting your words of wisdom. You let out a yawn, and he followed suit, making you laugh again. "You did, but it’s a good reason to have you here with me," he said, pulling you closer as you both made your way to the car.

 He couldn’t wait to get back to the hotel either, to shower with you, to crawl into bed, and fall asleep wrapped up in your arms. "I’ll always be here, El."

circumstances will NEVER matter

oh my god please stop beating a dead horse

we have been over this topic so many times. People have repeatedly told you, "circumstances don't matter" and yet a ton of you STILL harp on about your circumstances.

STOP IT.

I don't know why some of you people expect bloggers to start saying something different when YOU are the one who keeps worrying about the 3D like it dictates your manifestations when you should have already hammered the fact that your assumptions manifest and that what you see DOESN'T MATTER into your head.

"but i-" I DONT CARE!!! Stop relying on what you perceive to tell you if you have something or not. Stop seeking validation from the outside when it all stems from YOU.

Your circumstances suck, we know. They are hard, unliveable, stress inducing, exhausting, depressing, etc. Nobody is denouncing that it's rough, but for gods sake you need to stop conflating having results ≠ it showing up in 3D.

The 'success' is you persisting in/accepting your assumption, that IS IT. Because guess what? Someone who dgaf about what they're being shown and knows that their assumptions are the only truth and form everything, WOULDN'T GIVE TWO SHITS ABOUT WHAT THEY'RE SEEING BCS THEY KNOW THEY HAVE IT. THEY DONT EQUATE HAVING SOMETHING MATERIALISE AS THE SUCCESS, THEY UNDERSTAND THEY WERE SUCCESSFUL THE MOMENT THEY ASSUMED IT.

you can sit there and complain about how shit is too hard but guess what? It's gonna keep being hard because you keep assuming it is. you can either stop and fix your assumption or keep repeating this cycle, it is up to you.

I often think about how Lewis said he personally called so many drivers in 2020 and personally asked them to kneel for BLM. I think about how he said he personally tried to explain the protest to them and answer all their questions. I think about how he felt when so many of them still declined. I think about how he was fined for wearing shirts for BLM. I think about how F1 stopped him from wearing a shirt that simply said "Justice for Breonna Taylor." because F1 wanted to 'de-politicise' the sport. I think about how when they asked Stefano Domenicali, the CEO of F1, about Lewis' activism, he said F1 is not racist and he does not "Percieve" the racism Lewis is talking about.

I think about how Nelson Piquet, who was fined $1 million for racially abusing Lewis on video was *banned* from the paddock. I think about how he just showed up to the paddock today clearly wearing a paddock pass and hanging out outside of Red Bull, not even hiding inside.

I think how this is all so symptomatic of how rotten to the core F1 is. How Lewis being the most successful driver in the history of the sport did not spare him from this.

Hiiiii, love your work! If you’re not too busy or anything could you please make one where you’re mad at Oscar but his love language is physical touch so when he wants to hold your hand, yiu keep your fingers tense and try to wiggle free so he clasps them down and tapes his and your hand together??

if anyone has that one pic of Oscar (from 2023 I think) where he’s in the cockpit and he’s looking up w those bottom eyes… send it my way pls🙏

He ate your leftovers.

Rookie mistake.

You’d been giving him the silent treatment for eighteen hours and sixteen minutes—yes, he was keeping count.

You went so far as to put a pillow barrier between the two of you last night. When he protested, you typed into your notes:

don’t even try to cross it or else I’ll go sleep in the guest room.

So today, while you were sat on the sofa sipping a tea and watching some reality television show, he came and sat next to you. His thigh brushed yours. You got up, and sat on the other end of the sofa.

“Baby, come on I said I was sorry.” He reached out for you, but you twisted away from his hand. “And I bought you more. What more do you want from me?” He was pouting now. That was the only way to explain it. He got close enough to you where he knew you wouldn’t move away. “Please. I miss you. I miss your kisses and your cuddles.” He huffed. “You can be mad at me and give me the silent treatment, just please let me hold you.”

It was taking everything in you to continue being stubborn. You felt bad for him—only a little. But you had to teach him a lesson to be sure that he wouldn’t do it again. You clenched your jaw to stop from smiling, and gave him a nasty side eye.

He called your name, drawing out the last part of it dramatically. When you didn’t respond, he reached out, placing a hand on your thigh. You quickly batted it away, but he caught your wrist in his other hand. His days training for formula one made him way stronger than you, so your efforts to try and pull your hand back were useless. He took his free hand and laced his fingers between yours, gripping onto your stiff hand.

You continued to try to wiggle free. Alas, it was no use.

Oscar’s kisses started on the back of your hand, then trailed up your arm. He reached your upper arm before you gave his head a small shove. He got the hint and pulled back, but not without looking up at you with an exaggerated pout.

Your resolve was crumbling quickly under his gaze. “You can’t look at me like that when I’m mad at you. It’s cheating.” You protest, still trying to wiggle your hand free.

Oscar didn’t care. Because you had finally spoken to him. Eighteen hours without the beautiful sound of your voice had come to an end. He was smiling like a damn fool. “You spoke to me.” He pointed out, his voice soft and full of love.

You glared at him, but it didn’t hold up for long. You laughed, fingers relaxing to hold his hand properly. “Fine. Fine. I forgive you.” You gave in, but not without a roll of your eyes.

He took that as permission, not wasting a second longer to connect your lips. It was impatient, but so familiar. You could feel him smiling into it. His hands found your sides and he pulled you into his lap. His fingers dug into your sides like he was afraid you’d run away otherwise. He pulled away, resting his forehead against yours. “I’m never making that mistake again.” He chuckled, shaking his head.