As I Wrote Some Posts Ago, The Bonus Instalment Of Robin's Blues Will Have More Than One Ending, One

Your username - Helecthra - beautifully.

♥️

It may take me a while to finish writing and publish the 18th instalment of Robin's Blues (I am after all, once again, in exam season) but I will make it up to you all with some snippets of another work of mine!

Behind Blue eyes, entry 1

Alfred both loved and hated his granddaughter’s blue eyes, Thomas’ eyes.

He loved them because they reminded him of the man who once laughed through halls and who smiled like he held all the secrets of the universe.

He hated them for the same reason.

And now, they’re gone.

It should be a relief.

It is a relief.

But it’s also a wound.

Something sacred has vanished.

And Alfred is nothing but pain and reprieve held in the same trembling breath.

Because Thomas is gone.

Because Thomas will never really leave her (him).

https://archiveofourown.org/series/4163446

Idk if Ao3 is playing tricks on me by showing one inexistant extra comment on one of my fic or by hinding said comment from me.

If it's the second instance I am very sorry for my missing reply, but I quite literally CAN'T see your comment.

Please Help me find a prompt so I can credit its author

Tumblr prompt:

A daughter of Apollo who finds that anything she even briefly mentions wanting tends to show up on her bed within a week. New watercolors, candies, hairties. She suspects that one of the Hermes' kids is doing it, but no one is willing to give them up. It stops after Manhattan.

I can't find the one who originally wrote this prompt, if you know their username please write it to me, I would like to credit them.

That said I strayed from the aforementioned prompt but I liked how it turned out, so, if you are interested on how this fic turned out, here it is!

All the pain in Aelia's life stemmed out of love.

Sadly her parents are innocent, ignorant to her woes.

Sadly Vivienne is long dead.

Sadly the memories of Luke's hands on her make her feel dirty.

Sadly the pain of her scraping never leaves her.

Sadly the person that always left her wonderful drawings and cute trinklets fights on the other side of the war.

Sadly her twin's face in her mind is horribly disfigured, just like it was when she had to wrap him into his golden shroud.

Sadly her little brother's body is never gonna be found.

Sadly, this sorrowful circle it is never gonna end.

the worst thing that could possibly happen to ao3 is it being put on the app store so please stop asking for it because you don't understand what would happen if that went through. ao3's whole deal is it archives EVERYTHING, while the apple app store's whole deal is keeping everything clean and safe. so if ao3 were to have an app all of the 'bad' stuff, including nsfw in general, would have to be censored at best or would be purged at worse. the google play store is more lax but who fucking knows what GOOGLE would police if they got their hands on the archive. do not ask for an app. do not use third party apps. it's on mobile browser functioning perfectly, just fucking use that before you ruin everything for everyone please.

Idk Who would be interested in this, but I kinda ended up on a creative roll that, instead of bringing forth the main continuty of my series "Robin's blues", ended up exploring a sliding door aka 'What would have happened if, at the wedding venue (described in the first chapter of "of loving Nightwing (Titans edition)", Roy said the RIGHT thing and Dixie decided to take time for herself and heal instead of going on a self-destructive roll?'

The work would explore much of Wally's, Roy's and Lian's relationships with Dixie and would have two different outcomings.

Like I said before, idk who would be interested in it, but I kinda already wrote a LOT of this what if universe and I am kinda curious of the feedback it may receive

https://archiveofourown.org/series/4163446

In my works I often delve into themes such as pregnancies, abortions and parenting and Idk who needs to ear this, but I woke up with the visceral NEED to say a couple of things about it all:

I was born in an extremely religious country in which, strangely enough, abortion was legalised fairly early on. This doesn't actually mean it's easy to access to it, because of society's views on it, that trickle down on gynaecologists as well. About 70% of gynaecologists in my country consider themselves conscientious objectors, which means it is basically impossible to access voluntary interruption of pregnancy, except if the woman's life is at risk (or if you pay a shit ton of money in a private clinic, money that, often enough, one doesn't have). This (sadly) doesn't mean we receive any kind of sex Ed in schools (no, not even the crappy kind often showed in films) or any real help/guarantees for new parents, so basically you just have to pray that the condom won't break, because it's near impossible to actually have an abortion and you have almost zero support if you actually decide to keep an unplanned baby. That said my country is now also trying to make those laws even more restrictives (ex banning abortive pills, prediliging the hiring of doctors, nurses and anestheticians who are C.O.etc.), hiding the way our governement tries to rule over women's bodies behind our rapidly decreasing fertility rate.

One summer, while I was still in high school, me and my friends had to drive for over ten hours to reach the only region of my country where the objectors rate it's lower than 15% because one of my friends couldn't wait two months for the only gynaecologist who performed it in our area.

I was the only other girl in my friend group and, at my friend's request, I stayed with her the whole time. It was a traumatic experience, even not being the one having to undergo the procedure. Half of the nurses treated her like dirt and one of the counsellors (that are hired to help women or, more in general, people with a female reproductive system, in this kind of situations) started ranting about hell and damnation, while gripping my friend's wrist so hard it bruised. I literally had to pry the woman away from my friend and to throw her out, and I only managed to do so when I threatened to press charges.

While I always knew on an abstract level that in other countries, countries extremely close to my own, having access to abortion (or even to a morning after pill) was easy, easier than in my home country and decisely less frowned upon, it was all just news for me and I never really paid it much attention.

Then I left my country and studied abroad for a while and, during this time period, I met my partner. A couple of years later I discovered I was pregnant and I panicked. I was scared shitless because while I love kids, I hadn't planned on having one back then (or even now, to be honest). Even then I thought about it. If I decided to keep the baby I would have had actual support from the institutions, both economical and time-wise so my choice was actually mine and mine alone, not influenced by a frightening lack of resources.

I decided not to continue the pregnancy. I went to the clinic with my boyfriend and the procedure was quick, painless and nobody tried to make me rethink anything by guilt-tripping me with tales of eternal damnation.

I never felt any kind of guilt about it while living there. Nobody was forcing down my troath pro-life Ads or picketing the clinic when I went to do a check up specifically meant for people who had had a "traditional" abortion.

Even now, when I think about a traumatizing abortion, I don't think about mine, but my friend's.

Even now, when I see my nephews or my little cousines faces I don't ever regret having walked into that clinic.

Even then, the tinge of guilt in me resurfaces, sometimes, now that I live in my home country. A tinge of guilt I can't really explain, because I was lucky enough to be raised in a pro-choice familial enviroment. A tinge of guilt I shouldn't feel, because it was my choice (as it should always be) and I don't regret it.

What I am trying to say is that, even if you don't know it there IS a right way to do things and we should all fight to make them available to the largest number of people we can.

Religious guilt is never gonna be the answer.

My country tried to make it as such.

Now our fertility rate is at an all-time low from which I don't think we will ever recover and there are whole generations of women literaly terryfied of falling pregnant, because they do they are gonna lose their jobs and everything they worked for in their lives, without the possibility of actually making a choice on their bodies.

Religious guilt is never gonna be the answer, the possibility of chosing in authonomy for your body and for your future is.

Me, literally giving a character my (very minor) disability in a fanfic I am writing.

Some person on Ao3:" don't talk about things you don't know, girls aren't colorblind".

(Just in much less civil therms, thus I cancelled it).

First of all we are in the DC comic universe, people come back to life every other day, and you are telling me girls can't be color blind.

Second of all, girls can be colorblind or have various types of color deficency, you can trust me and my Tritanopia

Signed: a tired fanfic writer who won the genetic lottery and who has to video-call one of her brothers (who actually won in a non-sarcastic way) every time she is alone at home and she has to properly coordinate her own laudry.

Me, ugly crying on a fanart because it fits perfectly one of my fanfic even if it is just a coincidence.

(The fanart is objectively stunning tho)

TOApril Day 17 - Lamentations of Broken Fathers

I'm not comfortable enough with dramatic lighting to be able to say that this is my best work but oh well

"Who's under the shroud?" you may ask. Well if you reject the bounds of PJO's timeline and use enough imagination it could be literally any of Apollo's children :))))

Apparently people who don't have executive dysfunction think that actually working on something is the hardest part of doing something. And that's why they get mad that you call the rest of the project "easy" after you've finally worked through doing the plan and know what to do when you're working.

So when you're through with the epiphany of how to make it physically possible to make the thing you're making, and you're sharing the plan with excitement, because the hard part is over, and now you only have to get your hands moving and do it, they get mad at you like

"it's not that easy! It's a lot of hard work! >:C"

they mean it, because

to them, working is the hardest part.

They don't have to fight their brains to get started. They don't have to fight their way through making the choices, making the plan, making yourself make the thing. People who don't suffer from executive dysfunction think that the hardest part is actually doing the thing.