The Devil Works Fast But Wikipedia Editors Work Faster

THERE IS NO ESCAPEE!!!

So, time in the Infinite Realms is pretty warped. Some places it moves faster, some places it moves slower.

This is pretty convenient for Danny.

This is pretty confusing for the other heroes.

Danny, leaving in a portal: Alright everybody I got some ghost king paperwork to deal with I’ll be back in a sec

Heroes, doing their business: aight

Danny: Hey I’m back! Gosh paperwork is so annoying to deal with..

Heroes: ??

*Danny has an argument with Jazz or smby idk*

Danny, storming off: Don’t try summoning me!

Heroes: you two need to work it out

Jazz: Yeah we should. I’ll apologize when he gets back.

Danny: Hey guys I’m back! Sorry about that I was pretty upset but I’ve cooled down now.

Heroes: ???

Jazz: No worries! I’m sorry too.

Heroes: ????

Or: everybody consecutively forgot to explain the time warping to them. They’ll figure it out. Eventually.

thinking about the expert masseuse Alfred hired for the family that is paid a small fortune annually to provide massage services and ignore so, so many things. No questions, no remarks, just quality service and an ironclad NDA that, if broken, would probably topple said masseuse’s entire family line.

Things Alfred is paying them to ignore, in no specific order:

Bruce’s spinal hardware courtesy of Bane :)

weird amounts of muscle on everyone, even the kids (despite them allegedly not working physical jobs)

scars

FRESH scars

the fact that every joint in Bruce’s body clicks when moved/manipulated at the tender age of 42

Olympic athlete level physiques

rotator cuff injuries across the whole family

scars that are definitely from bullets and/or acid splashes

old signs of what looks like torture (Bruce)

Dick’s entire left arm is basically screws and plates (he “fell really bad” once)

every single family member takes deep tissue massage with max pressure with 0 complaints

calluses

no really, the weirdest fucking calluses

One of my favorite Ask Reddit threads/responses was one titled something like “What is a mind-blowing fact you could tell to someone in the past?”

One of the top replies was “I have a device that fits in my pocket that allows me to access the totality of humanity’s knowledge and culture in the blink of an eye. I use it to look at pictures of cats and to argue with strangers.”

I have never heard a more accurate summary of how most of us use our smartphones and the internet lmao

all of tumblr: we fucking hate bots

also tumblr:

Wait I had an amazing idea: Dcxdp but instead of Danny ending up in the batfam Danny is in metropolis

What if Clark is absolutely sure Danny was a kryptonian with a health condition? So I like the idea of Danny occasionally having to make sure his heart is still beating while in human form and the little stutters sound like a small heart condition to Clark, now this would normally not be a problem as Clark would just keep an eye on Danny but Danny sometimes gets too focused on something and forgets to check his heartbeat and it stops and when he realizes he taps his chest to “get it going again”. Also Clark always just happens to be around when a ghost shows up (yes they followed Danny, they need their enrichment) so he sees and feels the subfreezing mist that comes from Danny’s mouth and sometimes see’s Danny’s eyes glow green accidentally and knows that despite Danny’s “condition” Danny is much stronger than a human should be because of an accident that happened that ended up with Danny lifting he shouldn’t be capable of.

The thing is every time Clark tries to talk to Danny to see if “Danny knows what he is” Danny seems to disappear and somehow Clark can’t follow (hard to track a ghost lol). This culminates in Clark taking the nuclear option: Clark breaking into batman’s cave to use his computer to find out anything he can on Danny. This then leads to Batman coming down to suit up for the first time after a full week of having to show up as Bruce to galas to see a sleep deprived and obviously heavily caffeinated Clark with a bulletin board that looks oddly like a mess of conspiracy theories about Danny in front of the bat computer.

I'm in cross country so we end up with pasta every time we go to a teammates house for dinner we get delicious pasta every time

Is anyone else's AO3 down it won't load and @ao3org hasn't posted anything today..... I was mid fic

Rest in peace yall

TAKEOVER TIME!

So Bai He was hit with the purple beam, which is from the purple stone, which is from the white tiger, which elements is metal. I don't think that any person hit by that gem will have a power associated with its element, but the concept of her being able to bend minerals and gemstones and making friendship bracelets for everyone was too cute to ignore.

She can technically bend any hard mineral, but gemstones are easiers, lately she's been trying metals in small sizes.

Also

IT'S CORONATION TIME BABYYYYY

Shadowpeach Bio Parent AU (PREV / FIRST /

Next part is coming on March 8th. 2PM ET