Spring Cleaning Xx

BOOST!

Lol  it’s all ‘we should center the voices of the victims of Imperial core’ till people here realize that this has to be a sustained effort that would need the same energy from beginning to end, no matter how many days, months or years go by. Really  crazy that just when so many Gazans are on the site trying to reach out to us, Palestine seems to be falling out of relevance because the coverage of protests in the imperial core has begun to die down

I like to imagine that as he gets older, Riz stress bakes. Especially when he's stuck on a case, he pulls out a cookbook and starts making cookies and muffins and cakes. He like measuring out the precise amounts and having control over something and getting things to come out perfectly every time (because baking is a science) helps relax him from spiraling. He learned from Adaine. She learned from Jawbone and since Riz refuses to seek therapy, Adaine passes along Jawbone's tips in her own secret way to make sure Riz doesn't go crazy. So when the Bad Kids suddenly get a knock ont he door only to find plate after plate of baked good wrapped in plastic sitting on their porch they know someone needs to go do a wellness check on Riz.

Also @dullgecko put me onto the Aasimar Riz AU series by @whatisamildopinion and I am going quietly insane over it so here please have some fanart for it and go read it it's fucking amazing

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Fabian: Today's show is sponsored by Sword!

Fabian: Need to cut something? Use Sword! Need to poke a hole in another thing? Try using Sword! Have one thing and want it to become two or more smaller things?

Fabian: You could try Saw. Saw sometimes works.

Fabian: But other times? You need Sword!

When around other people Riz and his mom force themselves to walk fully upright with a more humanoid posture. In their own home though (or in Riz's office when he's alone) they tend to hunch and crouch slightly because it's just a more comfortable posture for goblins, even popping up onto the balls of their feet.

Riz freaked out his party at LEAST once on the Night Yorb quest when he got up in the middle of the night for some water and his siloette didnt match what he usually had in the dark.

This was just supposed to be a cute sketch of Shmim in a floatie donut, but then the others joined in around him, and now it's a Gob Squad pool party.

We got Alex crocodiling to the right (with sqweep her mandarin duck familiar), Riz doing some wakeboarding behind Dex, who is wildshaped into an Orca. Jingles is thirst trapping people from his dorsal fin, and Leena is practising their canonball.

The Gob Squad is Riz's University adventuring party in the AU I have going with @dullgecko, you can read all about it in the Big AU Doc

but on the real though, here is your guide to assyrian rice preparation from your friendly neighborhood assyrian:

start wanting rice. (or, if you are traditional, simply recognize your constant desire for rice.)

measure out two cups of rice. then one more. then two more. then another. this seems fine. you love rice. there is no way that this will backfire on you.

remember that your great-great-uncle’s recipe says it should be soaked overnight.

become consumed with despair.

decide to soak it for half an hour instead, acknowledging that the final product will be inferior and anger your ancestors but will still satisfy your now almost-overwhelming need for rice to be inside your body much faster.

remember that you should have set the water to boil when you soaked the rice. goddammit. 

once the water boils, put the rice in until it is half-cooked. the eyeballing or intuitive method is less effective than a timer but that’s how your aunt does it so you feel compelled to meet her standards.

now that the rice has fluffed up, realize how much rice six dry cups really is. holy shit. you’ve fucked up immeasurably. 

take a minute to dwell upon your failings.

grease a baking dish with butter. this will never be as elegant as you want it to and your fingers will get greasy, but the slightly shameful, self-indulgent joy of licking your fingers afterwards will make up for it.

pour the rice into the dish. wonder immediately if you actually buttered the dish beforehand and if you’ve just fucked up. 

melt approximately one thousand pounds of butter in the microwave and pour it over the rice, pondering your imminent death from rapid-onset arterial clogging. put a small pat of butter on the top to properly gild the lily.

put your pan into the oven, which you have absolutely preheated after your previous lack of foresight. shake the rice once or twice while it bakes to make sure the butter is well distributed. resist the impulse to climb into the oven with the rice. for the last ten minutes, sit next to the oven and count the seconds until it’s done.

remove the dish from the oven. shed a tear or two at the perfection laid before you. if you are dining with others, this is the time to serve the rice while making passive-aggressive statements about how oh no, you don’t need any help, you just made dinner all by yourself, you can serve everyone as well. (this is still fun if done alone, but optional.)

CONSUME THE RICE.

realize that you have eaten half of the dish in one sitting. no matter how much rice you made, this will always happen. 

put the leftovers away, if there are any, and enjoy a cup of chai while marveling at the amount of food you have just eaten. if possible, fall asleep in an armchair, sitting up, head tilted slightly back, like a grandpa.

for the rest of the evening, think fondly of how much rice you have in the fridge now and how many meals it will supplement, refusing to acknowledge that you will almost certainly eat the rest of it in a few hours for a midnight meal.

PLEASE DO NOT THINK FOR EVEN A SECOND THAT YOUR VOICE WILL NOT HAVE AN IMPACT THIS IS LITERALLY THE BARE MINIMUM

I'm sorry for putting this in the BLM and stop Asian hate tag but in the last few days posts tagged with "Palestine" have not been showing up.