"Cloudward, Ho! Is A Bad Name" You Hate Whimsy + Adventure + The Ability To Say Ho All The Time

Ok I really love how this artist does the batfam y’all

The Kids Aren’t Alright

You all pulled me back into this fic idea so now Im pulling all you with me into this WIP

Because y’all started reblogging my old fic idea post, I had to drag up a fic I never posted, read it, and then fall in love with the idea all over again. Without further ado, here’s the summary and first chapter I wrote like way back when:

Summary:

Tim has been Robin for about a year and a half now, and trust him, he’s seen some pretty wacked up stuff, but never this. There’s a man in a leather jacket and a red helmet that’s been following him around, almost acting as a kind of violent and disgruntled guardian angel. He’ll save Tim from a bullet, or maybe help end his fight sooner, and disappear before anyone is the wiser. But the thing that worries him the most is not that he has a stalker or that the leather jacket get-up is seriously screaming issues.

It’s the fact that this guy reminds him so much of Robin II.

But that can’t be right because Jason Todd is dead. Right?

OR

Jason comes back from the dead, and he’s still angry at Bruce and Dick and the world, but God knows he can’t be angry at a kid who gets thrown into the thick of it because of some stupid adult’s problems. He’s been that kid for most of his life, and afterlife. But goddamnit, the last ounce of goodness he has left in him is screaming at him to GET THE KID OUT OF THERE BEFORE HE ENDS UP LIKE YOU. So now Jason’s grand come-back plan has just been revised.

Step 1: Get revenge on Bruce Step 2: Kill the Joker Step 3?: SAVE THE KID

Keep reading

girl who loves her friends so much but is so bad and awful at messaging them back for some reason even though she really really wants to talk to them

!!!IMPORTANT FOR BLACK US VOTERS!!!

I saw this on Facebook and went to check my registration status, sure it was fine because I voted recently, but I put in the info and it said I’m not registered

PLEASE, especially if you’re a Black voter, check your registration status at vote.org

Service Offered: Professional Third Wheel

Unwanted suitors? Not sure if you’re on a date? Too nice to turn him down? I can help! With nearly four years of experience sabotaging romantic encounters, I’m the uncomfortable silence you deserve… and now, I’m offering my services professionally. 

Bring me along as a platonic bufferzone on unwanted or ambiguous dates with suitors you’re not interested in but don’t know how to turn down. Guaranteed to kill the mood or your money back!

Basic services include: Terrible puns, poorly-timed jokes, casual physical displays of affection, bringing up unappealing facts about you (to be established or fabricated ahead of time), including myself in attempts at cuddling, domineering the conversation, irritating laughter, talking about I may have finally found an apartment for rent that’s big enough to house all of your cats, subtly making remarks about how nice it is that you’ve made a new friend.  More advanced services: Creating diversions (available at tiers 1, 2, and 3; examples include pouring water over my head, impromptu hula dancing, and  triggering alarms), intimate displays of physical affection, accidentally spilling drinks on your suitor’s clothing, laughing at everything your suitor says while drinking until I manage to time it so that water comes out of my nose and sprays onto them. 

 Package deals: 

The Gay Best Friend: What it sounds like. Because this persona runs the risk of stereotype and exploitation, I prefer to keep this subtle. Willing to engage in mild flirtation with your suitor. Please use discretion when requesting this service; the intention is to make him realize that your feelings towards him are platonic. Do not even consider this package if he is aggressively homophobic. 

The Imposing Older Brother: I scowl, smirk, and huff judgmentally. Comes in two flavors: the Violent Ex-Con and the Insufferable Elitist. Can flex my physical or intellectual muscles as needed. 

The Irritating Younger Brother: I bring a gaming device along, snicker rudely and roll my eyes whenever he speaks, complain about the time, chew with my mouth open, shrug indifferently, prop my sneakers on his chair, wipe my nose on my hand, and bluntly interrupt the conversation whenever it strays out of your comfort zone. 

The Priest: Why the heck would you bring your priest on a date?! I don’t know, and neither will your suitor! Obfuscate them into backing off. If that doesn’t work, I will recite dry Biblical passages until they are driven away by crushing boredom or fear of Hell. 

The Son from The Future: Depending on the age difference, I can also pose as your Son from the Current Era. Will dress in conspicuously unusual clothing (ex. holographic baseball cap, life preserver, roller skates, VISOR-like sunglasses), continuously ask for the date and time, and anxiously mutter about how it’s almost time for you to ditch this place and meet my father for the first time.

The Enslaved Zombie Ex-Boyfriend: I don milky, semi-opaque contact lenses and follow you around mindlessly, with jerky, unnatural movements. I am at your beck and call, controlled from beyond the grave by your occult powers - the fate of all the boyfriends who displease you.  

The Demon Prince: I wear a stylish fawn suit, soft kidskin gloves, and silver cuff-links etched with strange symbols. I have a ring or a cane decorated with the head of a ram. I say little, but smile often. Now and then, I pull out a little silver hourglass from a chain around my neck and examine it, tapping my foot, my fingers, or my cane impatiently. I adopt a curious and subtle accent and ask him to appraise his immortal soul. I carry a sleek briefcase rigged to emit a bright light if I crack it open a hair. Optional: I carry a cube of sulfur in my pocket for the smell.

The Mulder: A proven classic. I periodically derail the conversation with crackpot conspiracy theories, the nature of reality, extraterrestrial intelligence, and ESP. May accuse your suitor of being a Reptilian, or demand that they feel the scar where I had an alien implant removed. Insist that we change tables because this one is bugged and we are under surveillance by the secret shadow government.    

The Fiance You Thought Was Lost at Sea: I burst through the door, dripping wet, with barnacle-encrusted clothing and a crab dangling from my ear lobe. I’ll smell of brine and have a haunted look in my eye. This will require some acting skills from you; you’ll need to throw yourself sobbing into my arms and cry, “I thought I’d lost you!” and I’ll hold you and mutter something about Davy Jones getting ahead of himself.  

Other: I am happy to work with you to develop a persona specific to your unique needs and preferences. 

Rates: Sliding scale, determined by me on a case-by-case basis. I want to make my services available to all who need them. Factors such as the relative heinousness of suitor is considered; affluent clients can generally expect to pay more as likelihood of physical or spiritual harm increases. For swanky dates in nice locations with minimal levels of danger, I typically ask only that you cover the cost of my meal, entrance fees, transportation, and other expenses.

IMPORTANT: Although I am prepared to deal with any number of eventualities, I am not a professional: bodyguard, assassin, exorcist, crocodile hunter, or escort. If you expect that any of these services will become necessary, I am happy to put you in touch with a specialist. ADDITIONALLY: If your suitor is non-human, please be upfront with this so that we can plan accordingly. We do not want a repeat of the events of Halloween 2012.

ADDENDUM 2014: I reserve the right to terminate our deal at any time. This is a exclusively a professional relationship, and any physical or romantic affection we may share may be considered performance and unrelated to my personal feelings. ADDENDUM 2015: If you are trying to orchestrate a set-up because you get off on watching your significant other jealously beat the crap out of perceived rivals, fuck you. Vengeance will be swift.

holy fucking shit people simulated the 302 neurons in a worm’s brain with software, put it in a Lego robot and it behaves like a worm

http://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/weve-put-worms-mind-lego-robot-body-180953399/?no-ist

(for the Goblin King AU)

After Riz became the Goblin King, he was invited to attend The Bloom.

For some reason, the Lords of the Wing were very familiar...

Riz is not having a good time at The Bloom. Other than people trying to suss out whether or not he was there to make marriage alliances (no, go away) he'd had to deal with just so much bullshit.

It had been MANY blooms since the goblin court had been able to attend The Bloom so there was quite a bit of chatter about it. Most people assumed they'd been destroyed after that whole business with Maglubiyet and they were all very interested in the gossip about them apparently being back now.

When he arrived with just a few fae-goblin guards (sans any of the other Bad Kids, he didn't want them involved in any fae nonsense and it was dangerous for 'mortals')(yes he is trying very hard to make sure no-one finds out he is also, technically, mortal) they were shown to where they would be hosted for the duration of The Bloom. A literal garbage heap. Apparently he had spent too long staring at it in disbeleif and wondering if they were intentionally trying to insult him because they offered him MORE garbage if it wasnt a suitable amount.

After explaining that no, goblins dont do... this... anymore (its been nearly 4,000 years on the mortal plane since they've been back to the fae wilds in this capacity and they much preferred normal rooms now) through gritted teeth they at least managed to scrounge up some actual lodgings for them.

Riz just wanted this whole thing to be done and they had only really just started the first 'event' of the festivities. A nice dinner in the gardens where all the attendees could mingle and get to know eachother.

The rogue had spent the last hour or so sitting in a corner, projecting an air of 'don't talk to me' as hard as possible while trying to pretend he wasnt there. In the midst of his disassociating he heard a pair of familiar laughs that jerked him out of his own head, whipping around to see where they were coming from he had to stare for a few moments to work out what the hells was going on.

Okay, it wasn't Fabian and Fig they just sounded... so similar it was eerie. He ended up creeping over closer to just hang out and listen, feeling a little calmer with such familiar voices and attitudes he ended up sticking close to their orbit for almost the entire event. With the amount of wild shit the pair of them got up to it was almost like Fabian and Fig were there, and they made good substitute bad kids.

So to further out myself as a Fandom Old ™

I’m browsing ao3, as one does, and this one image struck me to the core and I just stared at the screen for like a solid 20 seconds

Oh how the world has changed

REBLOG!!!! SPREAD THIS PLS!!! EVERYONE IN OR AROUND VIDOR PLEASE STAY SAFE!!!