Being Adopted By Thorin And Bilbo

being adopted by thorin and bilbo

ft. my lame attempts at humor

in this house we stan bagginshield

TW: joking about death, brief mention of the ‘Birds and the Bees talk’

(modern girl in middle earth)

((target audience: teen reader))

tagging people who i think might be interested in reading: @trxblemaker @artsywaterlily @elles-writing @emilys-books

thorin and bilbo had started courting a little after rivendell

partly thanks to your nagging and suggestive comments

they had already “parented” you on the quest

thorin being overly protective

making sure you are trained sufficiently in weapons

instructing other company members to watch you during fights if he is unable to

thorin doesn’t trust men so you best believe when you are in Laketown you don’t leave his sight

braiding your hair

tickling you when you’re grumpy or pouty so he can see that “adorable smile of yours”

draping his heavy fur coat over your shoulders when it gets chilly

his hugs are the best

you feel so safe and warm and loved

you love to bury your face in his fur coat and breathe in his scent of smoke and pine trees

and then there is bilbo during the quest

he definitely mothers you

pushing you behind him during a fight, covering you with his shaking arm

he makes you eat your vegetables and go to bed early

lending a listening ear and some good advice when things get rough

wiping food off your face that you didn’t notice with his handkerchief

cue: “BILBO STOPPPP”

sewing you clothes

bilbo is incredibly scandalized by the suggestive jokes you make involving him and thorin

(before rivendell) “now listen here young lady: i am not interested in thorin. i most certainly am not.”

to which you respond “mhm. sure.”

he then sputters indignantly and marches off

that one time you accidentally called thorin dad

the entire camp froze

your face turned beet red and thorin’s eyes looked ready to pop out of his head

you attempt to defuse the tension by saying “ummm,, haha gotcha!”

this gets a few awkward laughs and eventually it is forgotten

but not by thorin

he was actually touched and vows from this moment on to protect you and love you as best he can

or you, though no one brings it up

bilbo seeing you running around camp and hurriedly following after you

calling after you, “HEY, hey!! no running with swords young lady!”

they do not understand your gen z humor

thorin made you promise not to joke about wanting to die

because it is, in his words, “concerning and upsetting”

at BOTFA, bilbo tells you not to fight

because he couldn’t stand to see you hurt

of course, you didn’t listen

YES EVERYONE LIVES

when things have calmed down and everyone eventually gets settled into erebor

and after thorin and bilbo have been married yes you were the flower girl

they approach you one afternoon, both obviously anxious

they talk about how they have always wanted children

and thorin says he would be honored to be blessed with a daughter

they offer to adopt you if you want

and of course you accept

because these dwarves are your family

it is a beautiful ceremony

there isn’t a dry eye in the house

though dwalin will deny that until his dying day

it is almost like a wedding of sorts

a coming together, a creation of family

but you were always family, now it’s just official

fíli and kíli were always like older brothers to you

they give you piggy back rides down the halls of erebor

falling asleep curled up in fíli’s lap while he works on prince paperwork

you and kíli get together once a week to gossip

kíli calls it “tea time”

you regret teaching him modern slang

you call dís auntie, and sometimes namadaz’adad, which is khuzdul for aunt

oh she loves you so so so much

thorin giving you so many khuzdul nicknames

to name a few:

nathith (daughter)

nathithuth zé (my first daughter)

ghivashith (treasure that is young)

you know how gloin is? constantly bragging about his wife

yeah that’s how thorin and bilbo are with you

over enthusiastically yelling “THAT’S MY DAUGHTER!!!!!”

thorin and bilbo trying to give you The Talk

it is mortifying

it went something like this:

“well you see, it’s like the hammer and the anvil, one on top, one on the-“ “NO STOP THORIN PLEASE I BEG OF YOU”

thorin: “bilbo, i suppose dís would be more suited for this job”

bilbo: “dwalin can do it for all i care- as long as it isn’t us!”

you can’t look them in the eyes for a few days after that

oh they are so over-protective

dating? it’s... difficult to say the least

bilbo instructs nori to spy on the person you are interested in

thorin has many intimidating talks with them

dwalin makes sure to sharpen his axe in front of them

fili and kili make “subtle” threats

you are exasperated by all of this

but it’s okay

because they only want the very best for you

trying to cook birthday breakfast for bilbo with the help of fíli and kíli

but somehow the pancakes end up stuck to the ceiling

hey, it’s the thought that counts

having any mental health problems?

or maybe you’re just feeling down

you have a whole family of people ready to help you

and you are so very loved

✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷

small little bonus story

throwback to that one time bilbo was captured by trolls

and thorin instructed you to stay at camp while they went to get him

but you didn’t listen

surprise surprise

you wanted to prove yourself

plus you’ve never seen trolls before and well...

curiously killed the cat

except you didn’t die

though thorin’s yelling after the whole thing made you wish you had

after gandalf saved everyone, thorin immediately marched over to you while everyone else was exploring the troll cave

“I TOLD YOU TO STAY BEHIND AT CAMP!! ARE YOU INCAPABLE OF FOLLOWING DIRECTIONS?!! YOU COULD HAVE DIED!!” he roared

bilbo came up to him and tried to defend you, saying that yelling won’t help anything

to which you exhaled a sigh of relief- ‘thank god bilbo’s on my side to save me from thorin’s wrath’

turns out no

bilbo then rounded on you

he grabbed you bY THE EAR and dragged you back to camp

all the while scolding you for your recklessness

at camp, he sat you down on a rock and stood above you

shaking his finger and lecturing you on the importance of safety

there were lots of “do you understand?!”s

yes mom

while thorin stood SMUGLY behind him, silent with his arms crossed over his chest

nodding along and giving you the Dad Stare ™

thorin later came and apologized for yelling

and said it was only because he cares about you and couldn’t stand to lose you

YES YOU GUYS HUG

and maybe you cry a little bit

it’s nice to feel cared for

and boy are you cared for

Follow Your Heart

Pairing: Ardeth Bay x Reader

Words: 12,609. Please do not hate me. I put markers to where you can stop and continue later

Warnings: Some pining. Little bit of angst. Definitely some fluff. And as you should know by now, smut. Unusual dirty talk in the sense that it is more romantic than dirty. Hopefully it gets you going though.

Keep reading

1K notes View Post

its-shadowy-heart-world

4 years ago

Oil Stains White Lace (18+)

This is a part two to my first smut fic here.

It made me so happy that the first fic went so well. I knew I needed to have a part two to my idea story concept I had made up. I hope you enjoy reading! Also I honestly don’t know if its a compass or a clock so I’m going with clock.

Warning: Their is still smut involved, choking, biting, degration, dirty talk, mentions of blood/gore, all in good fun of course. :) It’s still a porn with a plot so read the dinner to get to the dessert. Lol

Summary: You knew you had to see him again, but you weren’t sure when. After this first scare, you were left with a deep desire to see him again soon, hoping he at least felt the same. He still put up the facade that he despised you, but it was wearing rather thin. The next time he saw you again, how long could he be able to hold himself back? A man like him had a way of planning ahead.

- - -

Keep reading

2K notes View Post

its-shadowy-heart-world

4 years ago

Let’s Play A Game ━ Loki [smut]

Pairing: Loki x fem!Reader, also Grandmaster’s daughter!Reader bc yes. (A little of implied Loki x Grandmaster ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ).

Summary: You take a liking on your father’s new guest and decide to play with him a little.

Warnings: SMUUUUTTT!! Oral sex, unprotected sex. A little bit of sassy!reader and nervous!Loki (does that even exists? omg, anyway exists here lol)

Stay til the end for a shitty bonus ehehehe.

Word count: 2,427.

A/N: SO SORRY IF IT SUCKS AND FOR ANY MISTAKE CAUSE I SPEAK FUCKING SPANISH! *cries* And gif’s not mine.

Tags: @steve-rogers-personal-hell

MASTERLIST

Keep reading

2K notes View Post

its-shadowy-heart-world

4 years ago

webbed up | peter parker

summary: you’re being a little too bratty for peter’s liking, so he takes a leaf out of spider-man’s book and punishes you the first way that comes to mind.

warnings: smut; swearing, teasing, dirty talk, dom!peter, spitting, use of web-shooters, overstimulation, multiple orgasms.

word count: 5,468

—–

Keep reading

6K notes View Post

its-shadowy-heart-world

5 years ago

Me coming home after another unsucseful date to a house filled with cats and crushes on fictional characters

6K notes View Post

its-shadowy-heart-world

5 years ago

Hello

Wattpad : @Shadowy_Heart Instagram : @Shadowyheart89

2 notes View Post

its-shadowy-heart-world

4 years ago

Writer: There Was Only One Bed…

Smut fans: *gasp!!!!!*

Writer: So They Spooned All Night And The Brooding One Allowed Themselves To Feel Vulnerable For The First Time In Years And The Chirpy One Got Some Quality Snuggles

Fluff fans: *GASP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*

101K notes View Post

its-shadowy-heart-world

10 months ago

Hello 👋, I hope you're doing well..

My name is Mahmoud, and I'm a 17-year-old from Gaza. The ongoing war has devastated my city, destroyed my school, and made daily life incredibly challenging.

Despite these hardships, I'm determined to continue my education and build a better future. I've been given a chance to study abroad, but I need help to cover the costs of leaving Gaza, as well as living expenses and other essentials abroad once the crossing opens.. 🙏

If you can, please consider donating or sharing, your kindness can truly make a difference, and thanks for your time. ❤🍉

https://gofund.me/bd3ccf0b 🔗

0 notes View Post

its-shadowy-heart-world

5 years ago

Home Sweet Home - Spencer Reid X Reader

Description: Reader is extremely horny and is waiting for Spencer to finally get back home to release her pent up sexual frustration while helping Spence relax after a long case.

Spencer Reid X (female) Reader

Category: smut (NSFW)

Rating: Explicit

Contents: Female masturbation, Oral (female receiving), Penetrative sex, Unprotected sex/Creampie

Word Count: 3,860

——————

I loved my boyfriend with all my heart, therefore I supported him in doing anything and everything he loved and made him happy. Spencer Reid sure loved his job with a burning passion. There was only one tiny drawback about the said job, and that was the traveling. Don’t get me wrong, I am extremely proud of my boyfriend and understand that as an FBI agent on the Behavioral Analysis Unit traveling was part of the job, but my hormones didn’t.

Spencer had been away for a week, and I could not deal with this any longer. I tried to suppress my pent up sexual frustration in any way I could and patiently wait for my boyfriend to come back. I tried painting, listening to music, cleaning the apartment, I even read two of the books Spence left on his nightstand. However, nothing seemed to work. I wasn’t aware my sexual frustration could get any worse until it did.

Still half asleep, my first thought at 9:00 am was Spencer’s hands; how well my breasts fit into his palms, how small I felt as he grabbed me by my waist, how nice his fingers felt in my mouth. Even small mundane daily actions got my core pulsating; I missed being able to see him sit on the couch reading a book and slowly lick the tips of his slender, long fingers as he turned a page, I missed seeing his fingers gracefully jump around his new piano’s keys, I missed seeing his whole morning routine and how he rolled up his shirt sleeves and tied his tie.

There were many perks to living with Spencer, his apartment felt like home since the first day I walked into the living room, but maybe that’s just the feeling I get when I’m with him. I feel at home, safe and protected, an unexplainable peace embracing me, only felt when I’m around him. Living with Spencer had been a great way to spend more time together without having to drive back and forth between apartments. But one of my favorite perks was the fact that I could steal his clothes whenever I wanted to; specifically, his beautiful collection of cardigans.

Realizing I couldn’t go another day being sex-deprived, and given the fact sex wasn’t a possibility at the time, I went for the next big thing. Masturbation. It wasn’t my boyfriend’s dick, but my fingers will have to do for now. So I slowly removed my pajamas, jumped out of bed, and headed straight to my boyfriend’s closet with a very specific cardigan in mind. He wasn’t one to wear a lot of black clothing despite having many neutral colors in his closet, therefore, it wasn’t very hard to spot his all black, Comme des Garçons cardigan. As soon as it was in my hands, I lazily smiled; his earthy scented cologne filling my nostrils as I put it on over my naked body. I take a second to enjoy the feeling of the soft fabric against my body and continue to take in his scent.

I head back to bed excited to get my much-needed release. However, I take my time, needing to savor it as much as possible. As I lay down, my hands go straight to my breasts, one to each, slowly pinching my nipples in between my fingers. I don’t spend too much time on my breasts as I continue to run my hands down my belly going south.

Keep reading

346 notes View Post