❪  💜  MASTERLIST :  ❫  Ghost In My Bed

Ahh!!! it's finally here. The 1st chapter of this series. And it was really sooo good. Full of tensions and untold stories. So excited for the coming chapters. Eagerly waiting for the story to unfold and where it will lead me 💜💜💜

Burning Love (01)

Pairing: Jungkook x reader

Genre: Fluff, angst, smut (?)

Au: Exes au, CEO Jungkook.

Warning: mentions of alcohol, curse words.

Rating: 18+

Summary : Jungkook was your first love, your high school sweetheart, whom you continued to date throughout college, well maybe not throughout. Three months before finishing college, he decides it wasn't worth it. Six years later, you're far away from South Korea, working for a small company. What are the chances that the big multinational company that ends up buying the company you're currently working for is owned by none other than Jeon Jungkook?

Word Count: 14K

A/N: It took me so long to get this done. It was done by the middle of September but my phone crashed and I had no backups, so yeah had to rewrite it. So, please let me know if you like it because it took a lot out of me. Also, there might be some tiny mistakes because I edited it at like 2:00 in the morning, so don't mind it.

Prologue

THEN

"Is the seat taken?"

Looking up from the book you were reading, you find a boy you have never seen before, standing awkwardly. His hair covers almost half of his face and big doe eyes stare at you with traces of nervousness in them.

He must be new.

"No, it is not." You reply, offering a polite smile.

"Do you mind if I take the seat?" He asks scratching the back of his neck.

"No, not at all." You thought it was obvious.

"Thank you." Giving you a small smile, he occupies the seat next to you.

You watch him as he settles down and opens one of the books he was carrying and starts to flip through the pages. However, the constant tapping of his foot against the floor, lets you know that he isn't able to concentrate on the words in front of him.

"Are you new here?" You ask to hopefully begin a conversation.

He looks up from his book startled as if he was not expecting you to speak.

"Yes. This is my first day." He gives you a shy smile.

"That's great. If you need any help, let me know."

"Thank you." Giving you a small awkward nod, he returns to his book.

Seeing that your attempt to start a conversation has failed terribly, you decide to do the same.

You'd find new students in your class almost throughout the year, so that was not unusual to you, neither was his shy behaviour.

On your first day, you were shy and timid too.

You remember feeling extremely nervous when you first stepped in, not to mention how you were new to the city as well but from what you have seen, your school's extravagant appearance had that effect on almost everyone.

When you walked through the gate for the first time, you felt intimidated by the huge building in front of you. It looked like a building that could easily be used for serving royalties, with high ceilings, marble floors, classrooms bigger than you have ever seen, a huge open space, beautiful gardens and a dreamy lake that although was prohibited for the students, definitely completed the picture.

Your school is an international private school and is just as costly as it looks. With your father being a top tier businessman, money hasn't ever been a problem.

The students, unlike what people would expect, were nice. Yes, there are obviously a few who wouldn't fit in the description, but every school had those kids.

It took some time for you to come out of your shell and get adjusted to the environment and the people, he'll–

Wait, you never asked for his name.

"Hey, I'm Y/N." You say, turning towards him, perhaps a little too cheerfully.

Hearing your voice, the poor kid gets startled yet again and lets out a small squeak.

Okay, maybe you were not that nervous.

"Sorry." Red hue coats his cheeks.

Was he apologising for squeaking?

"It's okay." You wanted to chuckle at his cuteness but somehow resisted the urge. You knew it would only make him feel more embarrassed and you did not want that.

"I'm Y/N, by the way." You introduce yourself again, this time in a much softer tone.

He blinks at you.

"Oh, right, I never introduced myself." He chuckles lowly at the realisation.

"I'm Jeon Jungkook."

NOW

You've been glaring at the computer screen for around fifteen minutes now.

The reason you're glaring? Because you're tired as fuck and all you want to do is sleep like a baby. Although, if glaring is a tactic to not fall asleep or if you're glaring out of frustration, you don't know.

Your day so far has been filled with meetings, submitting reports, updating files and whatnot. Along with that, you have also been in and out of your office at every half an hour intervals to check if the server, which has been glitching since morning, has been fixed yet.

While yes, the last week of every month was the same, minus the glitching server, of course, today your body has apparently decided to resist any sort of work, to its absolute best.

Or maybe it's because you have not provided your body with enough carbs to deal with the heavy workload.

You've not provided any.

The grumbling noise from your stomach, very kindly, reminds you.

You mentally curse yourself. You should have taken Tae's advice and had some food on the way.

Seeing the cursor blink, you let out a sigh. It's as if it's mocking you as to how you've not typed a single code so far and with how unresponsive your brain is, you wonder if you'll get anything productive done today.

But you need to be productive. You release another sigh, before coming to a conclusion.

You have to eat something.

You're about to get up when a knock on the door stops you from doing so.

"Come in." You say, straightening your posture to look professional.

"Good morning, boss." Mina greets, making her way into your office.

You relax instantly but not before rolling your eyes. Dramatic as always.

Mina is your friend turned assistant. You met her when you were a newbie in the company and you both instantly clicked. At the time, she used to work as the assistant of the ex-head of the software department. When you were abruptly promoted as the head, she became your assistant.

"Good morning." You greet back.

"My morning has been good indeed. I mean, did you see Namjoon today? He came to work wearing a black silk shirt. A. Thin. Black. Silk. Shirt. Who does that? You can literally feel his muscles through that shirt." She rambles excitedly, taking the seat in front of you.

"You kidding me?" You try to match her tone.

"Hey, don't mock me." She deadpans, her enthusiastic look turning into a glare in a matter of milliseconds. "You'll understand what I'm saying when you see him. It's a serious issue, everyone, literally everyone has been ogling him and I swear he has a little smirk on his face that lets you know he's enjoying it."

You chuckle and nod in mock understanding. "Well if you had to come to my office to ramble about how hot Namjoon looks, I don't doubt its seriousness."

Mina's eyes widen. "Oh shit, I forgot. See, this is what I'm talking about, he's distracting people from work."

"By people, you mean you?"

"Shut up." She glares, yet again. "The reason why I had to come to your office is because apparently, you have not replied to an important mail by the office authorities."

You furrow your brows at that. In the midst of everything, you've forgotten to check your emails. "Right, I haven't checked my mails today. Just wait a minute, I'll check."

Logging into your mail id, you find a bunch of new unopened mails. Selecting the one from your office id, you start reading it.

From: officeml@fcs.co

To: ynsoftdept@fcs.co

Subject: URGENT MAIL.

Miss Y/L/N,

This mail is to inform you that Felix Consultancy Services has been sold to Jeon Jungkook and is now a part of Jeon Corporations. According to the contract signed, all the employees currently working for FCS will start working for Jeon Corporations from 1st September 2021.

We know this can come off as sudden and unexpected but we assure you that the contracts signed, have been made while keeping the best interests of the employees in our mind. We thought it would be best to let you know now, to avoid you taking any unnecessary stress.

We would request you to hold a meeting to let everyone in your department know of the matter.

We are extremely grateful for your dedicated performance and the hard work you've done for us. We wish you all the best and hope you take each step in your career with the same spirit.

Thanking you,

FCS Team.

Excuse me?

Is this a joke? It has to be. There's no way this is happening.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

There's that name again. Jeon Jungkook.

"Are you okay?" Mina's voice, heavily laced with concern, stops your thoughts from accelerating any further.

"Our company has been sold." You whisper.

"What?!" The disbelief is evident in her voice.

"Read this." You motion her towards the computer screen.

She gets up from her chair, walks towards where you're sitting and bends down to level with your computer screen, all the while with a frown on her face.

While she reads, you wonder if by any chance your office id has been hacked and someone decided to pull this cruel prank. But if that were the case, Mina wouldn't be here. She was technically asked by the office authorities to have you check your emails.

Realising that this isn't a prank, you deflate in your seat.

What are the chances really? You left Korea, left everything you knew, behind, just so that you could be away from that place and especially from him because the pain was unbearable.

Never in your wildest dreams did you imagine he'd buy the company you're working for.

"I think it's sudden, but maybe we should have seen this coming." Mina breaks the silence after some time, a frown still etched on her face.

"What do you mean? How were we supposed to see this coming?" You can't help the way your voice sounds. It's as if someone has said the most ridiculous thing.

She thankfully takes no offence to that and takes a deep breath, a thoughtful look appearing on her face. "I mean see, Mr. Denver has been handling the company for so long. He would want to retire at some point and from what I know none of his family members are interested in the business world."

"But isn't it too sudden? He never even gave us hints that he wants or plans to sell the company and they should have informed us a little earlier. They inform us just a week before we are supposed to start working for another company and that too over mail." You mumble, unable to hide your frustration.

She hums in agreement. "I agree with that but you know how Mr. Denver is. He doesn't ever want us taking unnecessary stress and he loves the company with his entire heart, I believe he must have handed the company in safe hands and about the mail thing, I think I heard he's out of the country, otherwise, he'd have held a proper meeting."

You release a frustrated sigh.

Mina is right about Mr. Denver, the CEO or ex-CEO of your company. He treats his employees as if they are a part of his family, always looking after their well being, and supporting them whenever they need. It's one of the many reasons working for FCS, never felt like just another 9-5 job.

Unsurprisingly, knowing that your company has your back lets people feel a certain level of freedom and ease in the work environment instead of feeling like a puppet. It allows them to make their own decisions and use their creativity to manage and complete a task.

When you became the head of the department, you made mistakes, oh you definitely did. After all, it was so abrupt and you were so unprepared but Mr. Denver always had your back. You remember the first time you made a mistake, you felt like you had done the biggest blunder ever possible in mankind and were so scared of the consequences. Unlike whatever scenario you and imagined in your mind, he gave you a warm, reassuring smile after learning as to what has happened. You remember feeling so light after hearing his comforting words.

Truth be told, you'd still be a mess had it not been for him and Mina. You'd be forever grateful for the way these two supported you in each step.

Mr. Denver is just as perspicacious and experienced as he is kind. His decisions are always so insightful, you've always admired his method of working and how calm he remains even in the most stressful of situations. You've also always trusted his decisions blindly. This time though, you can't help but feel bitter. Was it necessary to sell the company and that too, to Jungkook of all people?

"I don't know, Mina. Fuck, I don't even know much about Jeon Corporations and I'm supposed to start working for them? Even saying that out loud sounds so stupid."

"Well, I don't know too much about them either, just that they are a huge company and that the CEO is quite popular." And then, her eyes sparkle in a way that lets you know she has been struck by one of her brilliant ideas. "You know who knows about them and can help us? The internet!" She exclaims and before you can interject she's already typing 'Jeon Corporations' on the search bar.

Although, it isn't exactly his name that's being searched it is something that is directly related to him and that is enough to make you feel queasy. You have never searched him or anything even merely related to him on the net. The younger version of you never thought she'd have to, the older version of you didn't want to.

"Here we go," Mina mumbles more to herself, as she starts reading the results.

You contemplate if you want to look at the screen. You weren't lying when you said, you don't know anything about the company. You did at some point but you are pretty sure that it's irrelevant and of no use, after all, six years is a long time.

While you're not interested in him, any information about Jeon Corporations might be helpful. So, you make a quick decision and glance up at the screen.

First, comes some basic information about how Jungkook's father was the founder of the company and how Jungkook was handed over the ownership a few years ago when his father retired.

This you knew already.

Second, some information about how big the company has become and how it is now one of the biggest multinational companies out there.

That's new to you.

Then, came the top articles.

Jeon Jungkook steps out holding hands with Tina Fred.

Jeon Jungkook, owner and CEO of Jeon Corporations, was spotted making out with Jennifer Gomes.

Is Sarah Jones, Jeon Jungkook's new target?

Two days after filing for divorce, Olivia Fren is spotted having the time of her life on a yacht with Jeon Jungkook.

Model Sierra Alex and Jeon Jungkook are reportedly dating.

A look into the affairs of playboy billionaire Jeon Jungkook.

"Looks like he has got quite the reputation." Mina snorts.

"Maybe it's typical media." You say with a shrug, feeling the inside of your mouth turn sour.

"Pictures don't lie, babe." She replies, still searching for some information with squinted eyes.

"Who cares?" Reaching out for the glass on your table, you gulp down the water in one go.

You wish it was alcohol. At least, that way, your brain wouldn't be running miles a minute.

"I didn't even search his name, yet, mostly it's all about his affairs." She whines after some time, seemingly frustrated.

Before she can type out a more specific search, you interrupt her. "You know what? We can look for information later. For the time being, just forward this mail to everyone in the department." There's no way you'll be able to break this news to a room full of people without looking as panicked and stressed as you feel.

Hearing your words, Mina frowns in surprise and worry. She knows you enough to know that you're the kind of person to hold a meeting to discuss the issue because that's what's the right thing to do. Especially, when you strongly dislike being informed about such an important and serious issue over mail. For you to ask her to forward the mail, there must be something wrong.

"Are you okay?" She asks, keeping her voice soft.

"I'm okay, don't worry about it. Just a little shaken up, that's all." You lie, waving your hand dismissing her concern.

She knows that, that isn't the entire truth. Her frown remains in place but she lets it go, knowing whatever it is you'll open up when you feel comfortable. "Don't worry too much about it, it's of no use anyway. Also, if you need anything just let me know, okay?"

You give her a nod, grateful for her words.

"Well then, I'll get going. Just forward me the mail." She collects a few files from your desk before heading out. "Bye, bitch."

Usually, you'd chuckle at that. Calling you boss while entering and bitch before exiting, is peak Mina behaviour. This time though, you're too anxious to find any amusement.

With the door clicking shut, you're met with silence, unlike what's going inside your head.

There are thousands of thoughts running inside your head, the headline of each being the same; Jungkook is back in your life.

To put it lightly, Jungkook is a bitter topic for you. You wish you could say that it's bittersweet but then, that would be a lie because it isn't, it's just bitter. He's that one person for you, who has hurt you so brutally that even though it has been years, one mention of his name is enough to serve as a reminder of the pain he has caused.

It's tricky though, it's not like he is that much of an issue but somehow he still is. You are happy and content in your life and Jungkook is almost forgotten. Almost. He is like one of those wounds you don't even realise is there until someone mentions it or pokes it. It's also the type of wound that heals slowly, very slowly.

To summarise, Jungkook is someone you rarely spend time thinking about but when you do, it's against your will and quite unpleasant for you.

The last time Jungkook occupied your mind would be a month ago when you saw him at the party. It just caught you so off guard. Your subconscious screamed at you to run, perhaps she still believes he'll somehow ruin your happiness out of nowhere, just like he did all those years ago.

By the time you reached home that night, you calmed down when you realised how natural and normal it was for him to attend a business party. Just because you haven't encountered him before, doesn't mean he never attends them. Right? You also, assured yourself, saying, you will just have to be a little cautious from the next time.

But more than anything, you were grateful he didn't spot you.

Now though, all of those thoughts sound so ridiculous to you. You bet, in any other situation you'd even find the situation funny but you don't. After all, he's soon going to be your boss.

Is there no way to get out of this?

Mina's words about how worrying is of no use, ring in your head, answering your question.

That doesn't help the fact that you are desperate to stay far away from Jungkook.

With leaving South Korea, you let yourself believe that that's the end of everything between you and Jungkook, that he would always be a chapter in your past that would never be reopened.

How are you supposed to deal with this?

Amid the panicky thoughts, there's a small voice inside your head that's telling you that maybe you're overreacting.

Are you?

You don't know. You don't know how someone is supposed to react upon learning that their ex, the person they were once so in love with, the one who also crushed their heart without a second thought, is going to become their boss.

You release an exhausted sigh before getting up and walking towards the big glass wall. Looking down you find traffic and people rushing, and can't help but compare it to the commotion going on inside your head.

Currently, you are cursing your building's elevator for going out of service.

It had to be today out of all days. Isn't it?

Even lifting your feet from the ground feels like an extremely strenuous job for you. It feels like you're taking each step with a heavy load on your back.

Well, technically you are.

Since the moment, you read the mail, your brain has been busy coming up with different scenarios regarding how work from next week will look like for you. And out of the million scenarios, you didn't like any of them, because all of them somehow involved Jungkook.

Finally reaching your floor, you sigh in relief. Never have you found the way to the fourth floor, so tiring.

But now that you've reached home, maybe the sleep you so longingly desired would finally be yours. Maybe, you would finally get some rest and maybe, your mind will finally calm down.

Unlocking the door, you find the lights on which makes you frown.

You thought Tae would be asleep by now. He never stays up this late, none of you does actually, especially on weekdays.

You had texted him previously letting him know that you'll be late and had asked him not to stay up.

You've no idea what he is doing.

As you close the door, a little bark coming from the hallway breaks your train of thought. Turning around you find the little ball of energy running as fast as his little feet could carry him with his tail wagging even faster.

A small but genuine, smile appears on your face.

Stopping at your feet, Yeontan lets out barks demanding to be picked up.

You could feel your heart getting all mushy. How is he so cute?

Removing your heels, you bend down and pick him up and as soon as you do, he starts licking your face.

You couldn't help but coo at him. "Aww, did you miss me?"

He replies with more aggressive licks.

You chuckle at that. Although this is how Yeontan would welcome you every day, it never failed to make you feel rejuvenated after a long day's work.

Today's case might be a bit different than the usual, while it might not have made you feel completely rejuvenated, it still makes you feel way better.

You scratch behind his ears and smile at the happy bark he lets out.

"You're back." Glancing up, you see Tae coming out of the kitchen with a spatula in his hand and flour patches on his face.

"Yeah, I just arrived. What are you up to though?" You question his attire, a chef's hat and an apron that said hot stuff coming through.

Why are your friends so dramatic?

"I'm cooking, duh. What does it look like?" He rolls his eyes.

"This late?"

"Hmm. It's always good to keep in touch with your skills. Irrespective of the time."

"If that's the case–" you raise your eyebrow in curiosity, "–what are you making?"

He scowls at that, almost looking offended. "Don't tell me you didn't figure it out by now."

You pout at him in an attempt that it would convince him to tell you, but his scowl only deepens. So, you settle for sniffing the air like the weirdo you are.

Your eyes widen upon realising.

How could you miss it?

"Chicken butter masala?"

A smug look appears on his face. "With naan"

Your absolute favourite.

A small squeal of delight escapes your lips which makes Yeontan, who was almost asleep in your arms, bark at you.

"Oops, sorry." You say sheepishly, immediately offering more scratches as an apology.

Tae is a great cook. You would even say that his dishes could beat many top-level restaurants. The idea of breaking your unintended fast, with your favourite dish and that too cooked by your favourite cook, did wonders to your sulking mood.

"Okay, that's my cue." He says upon hearing the beeping sound of the timer. "Go freshen up. We can then talk over dinner."

You pause at that.

Tae must have received the news by now and you expected that he would want to talk to you about this. Truth be told, you wanted to converse about it as well. You don't know what would come out of the conversation but it's unhealthy to bottle up emotions and you just really feel the need to talk about it with someone.

The thing that bothered you, was the over dinner part. You wanted to enjoy your meal to the fullest and you doubted it would be possible with Jungkook being the topic of discussion. You remember how your mouth turned into this weird mixture of sour and bitter, every time you heard people whispering and gossiping about him. At some point, it felt like the ghost of his name was haunting you.

You don't want that. You want to have your dinner in peace.

Moreover, you are feeling slightly better now. Freshening up will only give your brain time to figure out more reasons to worry.

You hold Tan, who had his little head snuggled against your neck and was finally asleep, a little tighter and walk towards the kitchen.

You want to talk now.

As you step into the kitchen, the beautiful aroma of various spices welcome you. Damn, you don't remember the last time you had this dish. Your heart, brain and stomach were dancing in joy at the promise of what waited after the talk.

Okay, yes, after freshening up too.

You clear your throat to announce your presence.

Tae surprisingly doesn't even flinch at that, as if he has been expecting you. "What?" He asks without turning towards you.

"I want to talk."

"Hmm"

"So...."

"Leave Tan in the living room first."

"What! Why? He's already asleep–"

Tae whips around at that and looks at you with narrowed eyes. "I'm already allowing you, in my kitchen in your dirty gross clothes, don't test my limits."

You narrow your eyes right back. "Give me–"

He shuts you up by narrowing his eyes even further.

Huffing, you reluctantly exit the kitchen. You wanted to stomp but don't in fears of waking Yeontan up.

You gently put him down on the couch and smile at the way he whines, at the loss of your warmth.

He's such a spoilt baby.

Making sure he's comfortable, you walk back into the kitchen to find Tae leaning against the counter, waiting for you.

You cross your arms in annoyance. "Why did you make me put Tan down? He was providing me so much comfort." Your voice turns into a whine by the end of the sentence.

"Well I know how much you're going to swear and Tan is far too innocent for that. I don't want him to be traumatized." He replies in a monotonous voice.

Why are you still friends with him again?

The smell of beautiful flavours reminds you exactly why.

"Whatever" You reply before marching to where he is and take off his chef's hat.

His protests come instantly. "Hey, how dare you touch–"

"Shut up, I can't have a proper talk with you when you look like that." You grumble out.

"What do you mean? A chef's hat is like a king's crown." If he wasn't offended when you couldn't immediately tell what he was cooking, he sure as hell is now.

"Be grateful that I'm not taking off that apron of yours." You say, your voice leaving no room for argument.

You walk towards the small, two-seater dining table, rest the hat on the surface and take a seat, waiting for Tae to join you.

"I'm going to put extra salt in your food someday, you'll see." He mumbles as he takes the seat opposite to you.

Extra salt? Well then, you'll hide his favourite Gucci t-shirt.

Smirking internally, you maturely decide to ignore his statement.

Leaning forward, he clears his throat and you feel the air getting tense, the playful mood of bantering disappearing.

"So, how was work today?"

A snort escapes your mouth.

What a way to start the conversation.

"It was great. You tell me." You chime, sarcastically.

Tae only raises one of his brows at that, his trademark move. All his eyebrow raises have different meanings though, and after knowing him for almost five years, you have become an expert at decoding each of his brow raise.

This one screamed, you done?

You release a deep breath. "I don't know Tae today has been filled with surprises and not the good kind."

He hums. "I was surprised too. I did read some news about their company buying smaller companies but wasn't expecting FCS to be one of them."

"They were buying smaller companies?" Scowling, you wonder out loud.

He hums again. "Came across an article about that on the net, you'd know anything about it if you read some news."

Well fuck.

"Say, I knew that they were buying companies but I doubt it would make it any less shocking. We didn't know shit. I mean when did this all even take place?"

"I agree, none of us knew anything about it and I have no idea when all of this took place." A frown appears on his face. "But from what I have heard, the final papers were signed at last month's party."

"Last month's party as in when I saw him?"

Receiving a nod from Tae, you slump in your chair at the realisation.

He wasn't there for nothing. He wasn't there attending just another party, as you had initially thought, no, he was finalising the deal. Finalising his way back into your life. You doubted he knew that at the time. But looking at it now, a part of you wanted to laugh. If only then, you knew that running away was of no use. You'd save some energy, wouldn't have reacted as heavily and would have also saved the cab fare.

Taehyung places a hand under his chin. "That isn't really what's bothering you though."

You sigh.

You wonder how many times you have sighed today. Is there a record for sighing the most number of times in a day? If so, you're pretty sure you have broken all records.

"What now?" You finally manage to ask the question that has been stuck in your head.

He looks at you with soft, sympathetic eyes. "I don't know really but don't stress about it too much."

"I don't want to stress about it but I can't help it. I picture what it will be like to see him again when that's the last thing I want." You say, your voice shaky, allowing yourself to show the vulnerability you have been trying to hide so desperately.

His eyes soften, even more, he knows how much you hate feeling weak and helpless. "Have you asked yourself why it's bothering you so much?"

No.

That's a complicated question, one you haven't given much thought to.

While yes, there's the obvious reason that he is your ex, with whom things ended in the most terrible and painful ways but is that it?

A part of you says, no.

When you first came to America, you felt lonely and stranded, with your heart always feeling heavy. Sometimes your mind would wonder if it was just a dream, a very bad, cruel dream. But the harsh reality never took long to remind you just how real everything was. You didn't even have anyone you could just talk to, the bare minimum any person needs while going through shit.

In those days, you felt pathetic. To you, that was your identity, a lonely pathetic girl who can't get over her ex breaking up with them.

But even then, never did you wish you had stayed back in Korea. Never did you think of moving back, which by the way, your parents had offered you to, at least a thousand times.

To you, the pain, was worth it if it meant you were miles away from him.

And maybe that's why you are irate. Him buying your company, just puts all of that to waste, doesn't it? Yes, it's been six years, you no more consider yourself a pathetic person, but even then a part of you just doesn't like the thought of being anywhere near Jungkook.

Simply, you always held a grudge against him for hurting you the way he did. It also doesn't help that he is now your boss, if anything, it only adds fuel to the fire.

But is that all?

You're not so sure.

"I don't know if there's one particular answer to that, it's complicated. There are so many reasons, some I'm not even completely aware of." You decide to be truthful. "All I know is I hate to be put in this situation."

Tae's face changes into an expression that you know very well, it's the face he makes every time the philosophical side of him is about to make an appearance. "So, you know what you're feeling but you don't completely know why you're feeling the way you are."

You nod. "In a way, yes."

"Do you think it might be because you don't know how you feel about Jungkook?" Seeing that you're about to object to his question almost immediately, he clarifies. "What I mean is, I know that you don't harbour any of the old romantic feelings towards him, but you sure do feel a certain way about him, they might not be the nicest of feelings but you still do. So what I'm asking is, do you have a clear picture of the emotions you feel when it comes to him?"

"I don't think so." Whispering you realise that you've always pushed this issue under the rug and maybe that's why you still have unsettled emotions about him.

Tae looks like he expected that answer. "Have you ever thought that this might actually be good for you? It might help you get a clear picture about what you feel about him and when you do, you can work on it."

"Maybe I don't want to." You shrug. "I have been doing pretty fine in my life, it's not an issue that needs to be dug. Not knowing how I feel about him, has never been a problem, even on the very few occasions, that it has been, it's been manageable. And trust me, if his presence in my life is what it takes to solve this issue, I'd rather not solve it."

"Are you sure you're not downplaying it?" He raises one of his eyebrows again, this one lets you know that he sees right through you.

But you're not going to let this conversation take that turn. "Can we get back to the main problem here?"

His brow comes back to its original place and sensing that you're not going to talk about it, he nods. "About Jungkook being our new boss, I don't think it would be a problem."

"What do you mean?" You ask, your voice incredulous. The concept of Jungkook not being a problem sounded too good to be true.

"I mean, yeah he's going to be our boss but so what?" He says in a questioning tone, relaxing back in his chair.

"Oh, yes please go on being all vague, I appreciate it so much." You deadpan.

He has the audacity to roll his eyes. "How much was Mr. Denver involved in your life?"

And you immediately get the point he's trying to make.

Mr. Denver has been an extremely inspirational person in your life but with well-maintained boundaries.

But that doesn't ease you completely.

"It's not that simple. Jungkook and I share a past. I don't even have any idea what to do if he tries talking to me?"

"Well if he talks to you, you reply and how you reply depends on whether you want your relationship with Jungkook to be anything more than that of an employee and an employer."

You shake your head immediately, you'd never want any form of relationship with him, the fact that you both still will have one, even if it's that of an employee and an employer, is testing your limits, having any sort of relationship with him outside of workspace is beyond your imagination.

"You know I don't want to." You grumble.

"Well then, it's simple. How he behaves or reacts to you is not in your control but how you carry yourself, is."

Hmm.

Even though it's not the ideal situation, this makes you feel better because this way you don't feel as helpless you did minutes ago.

Tae sighs. "Listen, I know it's not the most likeable situation but try not to overthink it, it's not going to be of any use. Even though it might suck, just know you're not alone. Okay? If anything ever weighs on your mind, you can always come to me."

These words work like magic. It makes you feel confident as if whatever it is, you'll be able to deal with it because you're not alone, like you once were. Even if something goes wrong, you'll still have a shoulder to cry on.

You feel some of the weight being lifted off your chest.

"And if he becomes too much of a bother, we can always send Tan to scare Jungkook away."

The mental image of the scene plays in your mind and a fit of giggle escapes you. "Common, he can't scare anyone away, even if he tried to. He's just too cute."

Tae stares at you with his mouth hanging open. "I'll let you know, he definitely can."

"He can't, never in your wildest dreams. But at least he scares the bugs away– " You drum your fingers on the table, "–unlike you." He puffs his chest in defence, which makes it all the more difficult for you to control your laughter. It's quite the sight, especially with that apron he is wearing. "I'm not scared of bugs, I just don't.... like them."

You scoff, totally enjoying riling him up. "Then don't ask me to shoo away the bugs from next time."

He leans forward with squinted eyes. "I won't."

Smirking, you reply. "We will see."

Nodding, he leans back in his seat, squinted eyes still fixed on you.

You mimic his position but your eyes soften, the sneer being replaced with a small smile, and the tension that you have been carrying all day, leaves your body. "Thank you."

Saying these words, you hope he understands that you aren't just expressing your gratitude for the way he patiently listened and conversed with you. You're also thanking him for his thoughtfulness. The fact that he cooked your favourite dish, to make you feel better (you did not buy that 'keeping in touch with your skills' bullshit even for once), after returning from work and that too on a day where he learns that the company he has been working for has been sold, is something else entirely.

And if you were to go with the way the corner of his mouth lift, he knows.

"Well, I'm amazing, I know, I know." There he goes again.

"Shut up, I give you thanks once, take it, you won't get it back." You roll your eyes playfully.

"You know you love me so whatever." He replies cheekily. "But now that we are done, I'll have to go and check on my beautiful naans." He swiftly gets up, the sound of chair scraping against the floor, reaching your ears.

He shuffles through the cabinet searching for something in particular. Stumbling upon a flask, he turns towards you.

"I forgot, I made some tea a few hours ago, you wanna have some?"

"I don't think it's healthy to have tea on an empty stomach." You shrug, not paying much attention to what you just said.

"What?!"

Oh shit.

"Hello, my eyes are here. I need an explanation and I want you to be looking at me when you provide me one." Although you aren't looking at him, you are sure he has his arms crossed and a scowl on his face.

"I'm sorry. I just didn't feel like having anything today." Your mutter, voice small. You feel like you are being scolded by a parent.

He huffs. "Considering today's circumstances, I'll let it slide, but I expect this to be the last time. If this repeats, you won't be off the hook so easily."

You only nod in response.

He goes back to shuffling the cabinets and takes out a container filled with cookies.

"Go wash your hands and have these." He orders, putting the cookies on a plate.

"Okay, dad."

"Eww, that's gross. Didn't know you were into that."

"That's not what I meant!"

THEN

You were four when a butterfly landed on your open, welcoming palm.

You remember staring at the delicate creature and its pretty, blue fluttering wings with so much awe. You also remember pouting heavily and complaining to your brother when the butterfly flew away.

That's also when you developed this pull towards nature.

At first, it was curiosity. You were curious about everything. You'd often follow the trails of ants or maybe crouch down and watch a croaking frog. You're pretty sure at some point, at least one of them, if not all of them, side-eyed you while croaking to his people about how there's this weird human watching them like a creep.

As you grew, your curiosity grew into appreciation.

Now that you're sixteen and are well into your teenage years. You've learned that it isn't everything the movies and rom-coms make it out to be. Teenage years can be stressful. Mainly because the most unimportant things become the most important.

Funnily, you've also learned to seek comfort in nature.

And that's why you're here, sitting near the lakeside.

Not that, you're stressed or it's not like you have something heavy on your mind at the moment. It's just that stress is what first brought you to this place. You can't even properly remember what got to you but if you are not wrong it had something to do with your less than satisfactory marks in the maths exam. That was two years ago and since that day you've developed this habit of spending lunchtime here. But then who wouldn't love to feel the cool breeze blowing through their hair while having their lunch? You also, sneakily pet the ducks sometimes but don't tell that to anyone.

Settling comfortably, you open your lunch box. Finding delicious chicken sandwiches waiting for you, you lick your lips.

That's another thing about you, you're quite the food enthusiast.

Taking the first bite, you hum in delight. These are too good.

You're about to go for a second bite when you feel a shadow looming over you. Looking up, you find Jungkook standing, well, awkwardly.

"Hey?" You ask, unsurely.

"Hey–," he scratches the back of his neck a habit of his when he is nervous, or so you assume, "–do you mind if I join?"

"No, I don't. It's absolutely fine."

"Are you sure?"

Quite the deja vu, huh?

You roll your eyes and pat the space next to you. "Yes, I'm sure and stop being so formal with me."

He slowly walks towards where you are sitting and fiddles with his lunch box. "I just want to make sure, you aren't saying yes just –"

"If I remember correctly, I was the one who asked you if you'd like to join me."

"I know you did, but that was a week ago, and I don't know if it is still okay to join you, you know?"

"Well then, I'm telling you again, it's completely fine and you can join me whenever you want."

He gives you his usual shy small smile and finally sits next to you.

A comfortable silence falls.

In the span of one month, that you've known him, you've observed a few things about Jungkook. One of them being, how he's a bit shorter than you or how you are a bit taller than him. At least that's how you prefer saying it. You don't know how you did not notice it the very first time but when you did you were so excited. You remember returning home that day and when your mom asked how your day has been you replied saying that there is this new boy in your class and that you're taller than him. An answer, you know that didn't make sense but you were too happy to care.

Another thing you've noticed is, unlike what you assumed, he's just as shy as he was on the first day, minus the jumpiness that is. Throughout the day he'd remain extremely quiet and only speak if it's extremely necessary.

That also has something to do with why you were quite surprised to see him approach you. Knowing that he has no friends here and spends the lunchtime all alone, you've asked him if he'd like to join you on various occasions, you've also maintained gaps between your offers so that you don't come off as overbearing. But every time he has politely declined, which you have reasoned might have to do something with his shy nature.

You don't want to overthink it though. Maybe he finally felt comfortable enough to spend time with you or maybe he got bored. Whatever it is, you are not going to risk making him uncomfortable by asking him.

"Do you want some?" You ask after some time, offering a piece of your sandwich.

Sensing another is it okay or are you sure on the tip of his tongue, you glare at him, playfully of course, and thankfully he gets the message.

You watch as his long fingers slowly take the sandwich from your hand.

As he takes a bite, a very intense expression appears on his face and if it were not for the moan of delight from him, you'd think he was severely angry or in pain.

A small chuckle escapes you, which causes Jungkook to snap his eyes open.

"Is it that good?" You ask in a teasing tone.

Jungkook to your surprise, doesn't shy away and nods furiously. "It is that good. I didn't even know chicken sandwiches could be this delicious."

Your smile only widens at that. "You can take more if you want."

At this, he gets shy again and mumbles a small thank you. For some reason, you feel happiness bloom in your chest at the lack of his hesitance.

A comfortable silence settles between the two of you until you break it. "So do you like the school?"

He faces you and ponders about your question for some time, before answering. "It's nice, I guess, but it's also too soon to come to a conclusion."

You hum, agreeing with him, after all, it has only been a month that he's joined. "What about the city?"

This time his reply comes instantly. "The city is not new to me, I was born here."

Your mouth forms a small oh learning this. Most of the new kids who would join your school were new to the city and so you assumed that he was as well but clearly you were wrong.

"Were you new to the city when you joined the school?" He asks.

You nod. "Yes, I was. Our family had to shift to Busan because of my father's business."

His eyes spark with curiosity. "If you don't mind me asking is your father a businessman?"

"Yes, he is." You reply meekly. "He is the founder and CEO of IBN."

This time it's his mouth that forms an oh but unlike yours, it's a big one.

The curiosity in his eyes is replaced with astonishment, a look you earn from almost everyone but you can't lie, there's something different about his reaction. His eyes reflect something genuine. With the other people that you've come across, they too reflect amazement on learning that you're none other than the heir of IBN but at the same time you can also sense the wheels running inside their heads. Jungkook's eyes however reflect pure astonishment. There's this weird innocence, that you can't explain in words.

And that's another thing you've observed about him, his eyes always make his feelings transparent.

"That's one of the biggest companies out there. I've heard so much about IBN from my father." He mumbles.

Hearing this, you too get curious. "Is your father a businessman as well?"

He nods slowly. "Yes, he is the CEO of Jeon Corporations."

Not knowing what to say as a reply, you settle for, "That's cool."

"You've never heard about our company have you?" He sees right through you.

Were you transparent too?

You reply with a small shake of your head, feeling a little shy and awkward.

Not knowing a company's name isn't that big of a deal because let's be honest there are millions of companies out there. But you've come across people, teenagers even, who take great offence to not knowing about their business. Some even react as if you've committed the biggest crime out there.

That's the reason you decided to hide the fact that this is the first time you're hearing that name but that certainly didn't work.

"That's okay, it's not that big of a deal and our company is fairly new, so it's not that huge yet," he assures you seeing your nervous body language, and it works, his words instantly put you at ease.

Before you can reply, not that you had a proper one, he begins again, quite excitedly might you add, "My father started the company a few years ago. It's a private sector company. I want to become the CEO someday and if I do, I will expand the company and make it as big as I can."

Although he started with full excitement, he becomes shy by the end of the sentence, as if realising his sudden burst of energy.

You can't help but find it cute.

He's cute.

"So, a CEO, huh?" Seeing him nod to your question, you decide to tease him, just a little bit. "Everyone's going to call you Mr. Jeon, then."

His cheeks redden as he grumbles something inaudible.

You chuckle quietly to yourself and take a huge bite of your sandwich when a sudden realisation clicks in your brain. "Dis is da mosh eu hab tolk to me."

Jungkook looks at you weirdly and then breaks into fits of laughter. Uncontrollable laughter.

Seeing him laugh like that, you can't help but chortle.

It wasn't even that funny.

"You look like a squirrel." He somehow manages to say.

Finally, gulping down the sandwich, you respond. "Well, I'm a cute squirrel then."

"I'm not so sure about that."

"Heyyyyyyyy." You pretend to be offended.

He only cackles harder.

Is it that easy to make him laugh?

You don't know, but now that you've heard it, you know that he has a pretty laugh.

Where did the book go?

Not on the third shelf.

Not on the second shelf.

Not on the first–

There it is.

Finally finding the book that you've been searching for more than half an hour, you sigh.

You check if all the pages are intact. Finding that they indeed are, you issue the book and return to your seat.

"I finally found it." You whisper to Jungkook, who's sitting in front of you on the other side of the desk.

"Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire?" Seeing you nod, he further asks, "have you read the first three?"

"Yes, I have and all of them are so amazing."

He hums in agreement and goes back to scribbling.

Huh?

Weird.

He has been like that since morning.

You wouldn't find it weird had it been a month ago but since the day he spent his lunchtime with you, he has been a little more interactive and at ease around you. He doesn't hesitate to join you for lunch anymore, asks if he's facing any problem with studies, sometimes hums unconsciously and even converses with you, although it's usually about school and stuff, it's still enough for you to find his behaviour weird.

At first, you thought it might have something to do with the exam that took place today but then you asked him about the paper and he replied saying it went pretty well.

Now that you have a clear view of his face and observe him, it becomes very clear to you that something is wrong.

"Jungkook?" You whisper, trying not to get another scolding from your library sir.

Hearing his name he looks up.

"Are you okay?"

He fidgets with the pen in between his fingers and takes a breath before answering. "Yes, I am."

His eyes tell you otherwise.

You're about to ask him if he's sure when the stern voice of your library sir reaches your ears.

"Jungkook and Y/N, I expect the both of you to follow the library rules."

Well, he sure has a superpower of hearing.

Giving him a timid nod, you start pretending to intensely read the book.

After some time, you glance up to check on Jungkook, only to find him going on with his scribbling.

What's with him and scribbling today?

Looking back at your book, your mind starts to wonder.

What is bothering him? His eyes looked just so sad. There was another emotion you saw a flicker of. Desperation. Although, you're not so sure.

A second question pops in, why do you care?

That's a difficult one. It's not like you would be nonchalant about someone being sad, no matter who they are. Seeing someone down, makes you want to try to and make them smile and make them feel lighter. But your action about the matter depends on whether you know them or not and even if you do know them, to what extent. Trying to have a heart to heart conversation with a stranger is weird and even if for some people it isn't, you don't have the confidence to just walk to someone and begin one.

Jungkook for sure is not a stranger but then he's also just your classmate, like the other thirty-seven students in your class. While yes, he's also your seatmate but that is all that there is.

You don't even know how much a person is supposed to know about the other or how much time someone is supposed to spend with the other after which they can be considered friends. But even then, you're pretty sure you and Jungkook aren't exactly what people call friends. You both are a little more than acquaintances and a little less than friends.

With someone, who's in that weird limbo, you'd usually ask if they want to vent, if they don't, you just let it be, you never push them. You're aware pushing anyone unnecessarily is an invasion of privacy, you wouldn't prefer someone doing that to you and so you never do that to anyone.

That's why you can't explain why you feel this need to act upon your want of making him feel better. Maybe it has something to do with his big doe eyes, which always have curiosity filled in them but are now filled with sadness. So much sadness.

And that's what causes another question to rise.

How are you going to cheer him up?

That's a difficult one too.

If you knew exactly what's been bothering him, it might have been easier for you to figure out the how part, but you don't. You don't expect him to share with you either. But it also doesn't help the fact that you know literally nothing about him. His favourite genre of music, favourite artist, favourite films, favourite dish, heck you don't even know his hobby.

You slump in your seat dejectedly.

Couldn't you ask him the most basic questions? What's wrong with you? This way it's never–

Wait a minute.

You straighten up in your seat at the speed of light as an idea hits you.

It might work. Just might. And that 'might' is better than nothing.

You glance at the big wall clock to find it's only five minutes away from lunch. After the bell rings, you'll ask him, you mentally decide.

Those five minutes pass by slowly, with you constantly tapping your feet, but you also make sure that it doesn't make any noise.

As soon as the bell rings, you pack your things, get up and patiently wait for Jungkook to do the same. As he finishes packing, you both head towards the door side by side, an awkward silence lingering in the air, although you're pretty sure it's only you who's finding it awkward because you've something to ask but you don't know how to.

What if he declines? He has every right to and considering his mood most likely he will.

What if you don't ask him at all? Then maybe, he'll just sulk all day, which will also make you feel bad and worried for him.

A question never hurt anybody.

"Jungkook, do you want to go somewhere with me?" You blurt, immediately wincing at how weird that sounded.

Your stupid silly brain.

Jungkook, though, doesn't look weirded out by your question, if anything he looks confused. "Where and when?"

You stubbornly refuse to let the hope and relief wash over you at his question. "Umm, it's in the school campus really and I was thinking, we can go during lunch." You shrug, trying not to show your nervousness.

"Okay, sure." He agrees.

This time, you let the relief take over you and release a breath. Quite honestly, you were surprised that he agreed so easily but more than anything, you were glad that he even agreed.

"Let's go, then."

With dense bushes and about feet tall grasses, you have no doubt in your mind that this is probably one of the most unkept areas on your school campus. The dry leaves crunch beneath your feet as you walk, Jungkook following closely.

Along with your lunchbox, you're also carrying an additional one, which Jungkook hasn't noticed, even if he has, he hasn't mentioned or asked you about it. Which you're honestly thankful for.

A high pitched scream from Jungkook makes you whip around.

"What happened?" You ask rushing towards Jungkook, whose shaking form, makes you feel extremely concerned.

"Something dropped on my shoes." He says with his eyes closed in fear.

This only causes your worry to double up. Although you've never come across a snake in the various frequent visits you've paid, you can't erase that as a possibility. You look down frantically, trying to find the subject of his fear.

When you do spot it, you desperately try to hold back the snort trying to escape you. There's a part of you that's asking you to scare him and play a prank but you decide otherwise, he's already having a bad day and looks scared enough.

"Jungkook, open your eyes."  You say, softly with slight humour in your voice.

"I-i-is it safe?"

Okay, now you feel bad.

"Yes, it is."

He slowly opens his eyes, unsure and looks down.

"Is that–"

"Bird poop, yes."

His brows come together in a mix of disgust and embarrassment. "Well, shit."

"Quite literally." You chuckle.

"Umm, I didn't know that this is what it was, I'm sorry if I scared you." He mumbles, clearly embarrassed by his display of fear over something that isn't scary.

"No, it's okay, if anything it's funny," you let yourself tease him just that much and to your surprise, his lips quirk up ever so slightly.

"Okay, but how do I get rid of it?" He asks as he scowls to hide the smile.

"We can just wipe it off with a leaf and I got sanitiser in my pocket so we can sanitize the spot as well as your hands after you're done."

He nods in response, agreeing that it's the best that can be done at the moment.

You hold his lunchbox for him as he bends down to collect a leaf and does the needful, when you hesitantly begin, "I'm sorry for bringing you here, it's not the ideal place, I understand why you got so scared and I'd understand if you don't want to go any further. We can just head back."

He straightens up and takes the sanitiser from your hand. "No, it's completely fine, we have already come a long way and heading back now, is only going to put it at waste."

"No, you don't have to–"

"It's completely fine," He cuts you off as he sanitizes his hands, and gets shy again before saying "Just, maybe, umm, can we walk side by side–"

Seeing how shy and borderline uncomfortable he is getting, this time you cut him off. "That's absolutely reasonable, I should have been doing that in the first place, I'm sorry."

His body language eases almost immediately at the thought of not having to walk alone as he nods gratefully. "It's okay and thank you."

As you both start walking again, side by side this time, you can't help but feel stupid. Who thought it was a good idea to bring him along with you? Right, it was you.

Poor kid already has been having a bad day and then you bring him to a mini-amazon. It's still a surprise that he hasn't even asked you a single question regarding where the both of you are headed and has been patiently just trailing along with you.

Maybe he is cursing you in his mind thinking why on earth did he agree to go along with you. Maybe he thinks you have gone nuts. Heck, maybe you have.

Your anxiety only doubles up at the thought of the trouble not being worth it. What if your effort just doesn't make a difference? What if he only gets annoyed when you tell him or rather show him why you brought him here? Even more important question, what if they don't like him?

These are questions you should have thought earlier, you idiot.

Your footsteps stop as you approach the spot.

"So, we're finally here." You say, gulping, the anxiety refusing to leave.

Jungkook who has also stopped walking beside you, looks around confusedly. "What's so special about this place?"

"You'll see in a minute." You mumble mainly to yourself but he hears it anyway. "I'm sorry, but it's better if I head first from here, you can come closer when I tell you to."

Jungkook only becomes more confused but agrees anyway.

You cautiously step forward. If it were any other day, they would have been out by now, would be trying to climb you like a tree but today you see no traces of them. Something you are pretty sure has to do with your companion.

Not finding them anywhere in the out, you peek under the bush you know to be their home. And surely, two shining eyes blink back at you.

You wave your hand in greeting.

Hey, you're weird and you never denied it.

Seeing that they aren't coming out, you open the lunchbox that you use to carry food for them, hoping to lure them in.

To no one's surprise, three similar but much smaller pairs of shiny eyes come into view. One pair of which comes closer to you, until its tiny head and gradually its entire comes out of the bush.

Jungkook releases a small gasp.

Okay, so maybe not to no one's surprise.

You smile as the tiny creature comes closer to the lunchbox and takes a bite from one of the meatballs and meows in approval. You just knew he would be the first one to give in.

"She's so tiny." Jungkook whispers. Although you weren't facing him, you could still imagine his eyes being wide like saucers.

"He's a he and his name is Milo." You correct Jungkook, slowly petting the kitten's head as you take out a few meatballs and put them in front of him. "You can come closer now."

You get up from your crouching position as Jungkook slowly approaches where you are standing. Seeing him come closer, another body comes out of the bush.

"He isn't the only one?" He whispers, halting his steps immediately.

You softly shake your head, smiling at how flabbergasted he looks. "There are four of them actually, she is Mama C and this one is Milo"

"O-O-Okay but why is Mama C looking at me weirdly?" He asks voice low and sounding a little scared.

A small laugh escapes you. "She isn't acting weird, she's just cautious of you, that's the most natural thing considering you're a total stranger to her and that too when you're so close to her kids."

"Makes sense but umm she's coming closer to me, do I stay still? Do I bend down? Do I offer her my hand? What should I do?" He asks urgently voice even lower, almost a whisper.

Don't laugh. Don't laugh. Don't laugh. Don't laugh at how scared he looks. It's rude.

"Do what feels natural to you, she isn't going to harm you." You shrug.

Jungkook looks even more scared to be put on the spot. He fumbles a little bit until he slowly crouches down. You watch as Mama C stops a few centimetres away from his feet and just looks at him with narrowed eyes. Jungkook shakily offers his open palm to her and you watch in amusement as she sniffs his hands and gives it a tentative lick.

Time pauses as she seems to contemplate before giving out a meow, which you assume was one of approval because as soon as she does that, the other two kittens rush out of the bush as if they have been waiting for the permission for ages.

Now surrounded with three kittens, you offer food to the other two. Jungkook just looks awkwardly at Mama C as she turns around with full sass and walks towards you to get her share of food. You smile as she takes small bites from the meatballs in your hands.

"Do they have names too?" Jungkook asks, indicating towards the two new addition.

You nod. "She's Minnie and he is Juno." Scratching behind the ears of the said kittens, you doubt if he'd be able to distinctly remember the names. After all, they just look so similar, thick white fur with occasional black patches here and there. Initially, you used to get confused too but now you can just tell.

"They are so cute." Jungkook mumbles in awe.

You hum. "They are. You can try and feed them if you want to."

His eyes sparkle as if he has been waiting for those particular words but you also see the slight nervousness in them. "Will they let me?"

"You've got approval from Mama C so I'm pretty sure they will." You smile at him reassuringly and pass him the lunchbox. Milo's eyes follow your movements like a hawk. Realising that Jungkook now has his food, he parades his way to him as fast as he can, without giving you or anyone a second look. It only makes you chuckle at his behaviour.

Jungkook puts a few meatballs in front of him and Milo dives in without paying Jungkook any attention. "Isn't he eating too fast?" He frowns.

"That's how he usually eats. If you feel like it, you can break the meatballs into pieces and maintain some gap between feeding him. Although be careful, he gives these dangerous kitty eyes if you don't give him food fast enough, which can make anyone feel guilty and will make you feel terrible." You warn him seriously but with the way he nods, you know he didn't take the kitty eyes part seriously.

Oh boy, he'll learn it the hard way.

Once you feed all the meatballs that you had, you get up to fetch some more from the lunchbox, which makes the other three cats meow and follow you.

You crouch next to Jungkook and take a few out to feed them. As they feast on it, you slowly start petting Mama C, your heart-melting at the way she softly purrs. "You can try and pet them too, you know?"

"Can I?" He whispers, sounding unsure.

"Go for it, but if you pet Milo he possibly won't even realise that you're petting him because when he eats, he doesn't care about anything."

He furrows his brows while looking at Milo. "Whom should I pet then?"

"You can try pet her." You motion towards Mama C who's currently putty in your hands.

"She's intimidating, I don't think she'll let me." He says, looking even more unsure.

"She isn't intimidating at all, trust me." You say trying to assure him.

He nods but you can tell he still feels unsure. Shuffling closer to you, he shakily puts his hand on the top of her head and just keeps it there for some time, waiting for any sign that lets him know that she doesn't want to be petted by him.

She just looks up at him, for about a second and then goes back to her food. Jungkook takes this as a sign that she's okay with him and slowly runs his hand from the top of her head to the middle of her body in a back and forth motion.

The biggest smile breaks on his face when she starts purring. It's a genuine smile, mixed with excitement and slight disbelief.

You've noticed previously that he has bunny teeth but you've never seen them full-on display like this. The time he laughed during lunchtime, his head was thrown back, but now you see his bunny teeth, you realise it makes his smile just that much more adorable.

"She isn't as scary as I thought, she's kinda cute." He says to you with visible giddiness, getting a little bold with petting and feeling more confident.

You chuckle, feeling happy that your plan didn't go to waste and that it actually worked. "She is."

A comfortable silence falls between the two of you, the only sounds being the cats chewing on their food and the occasional purring.

After some time you hesitantly begin with something that's been on your mind. "Jungkook, if it isn't too much to ask, please don't tell anyone about this place or about them."

His hands that were busy petting momentarily stop as he turns towards you with curiosity etched on his face. "Is it like your secret spot?"

You sigh, feeling unsure as to how to explain it. "You can put it that way, I guess, but more than that, this is their safe space. When I first found Mama C, she was injured, it might be so that she accidentally hurt herself but it looked like someone intentionally hurt her. She couldn't even walk and she was pregnant. Can you imagine that? That was about a month ago, and I somehow brought her here because it didn't seem like anyone visited this place, treated her and everything and now she seems fine. So yeah, if anyone else were to find this place, I'd feel very anxious about anyone hurting them or even making them feel uncomfortable." You ramble in one breath.

Jungkook just looks at you for some time and his grip on Mama C's fur tightens just the slightest, not enough to be uncomfortable but in a protective way. "I won't tell about them to anyone." He says, his voice sincere, letting you know that he means it.

You give him a small and equally sincere smile. "Thank you."

"If you don't mind me asking, why did you bring me to this place?" He asks with a curious frown on his face.

Well shit. How do you answer that?

Do you lie? Even if you do what do you say? You just thought of bringing him here? Was that even a good enough reason? You believe he knows, that you two aren't all buddy-buddy enough for you to just casually bring him here, especially after telling him how much this place means to you. It's not that you don't trust him, you know that he won't ever think of causing any harm to anyone, he just has this aura of innocence that is somehow undeniable which also makes this image of him harming anyone seem impossible. But then again, there are plenty of people who wouldn't possibly harm the cats, but that doesn't mean you'll just go on inviting everyone.

Seeing that your mind won't come up with a good enough lie, you settle for the truth. "You've been down since morning and it looked like something was bothering you so I thought bringing you here would make you feel better." Your voice gets smaller as you speak and you don't dare to look at him.

The longer he remains quiet, the more you get anxious.

Is he going to tell you that's it's none of your business? Is he going to get mad at you?

To your surprise, he does none of that, instead, he himself sounds surprised. "You noticed?"

"It was kind of obvious." You shrug, still feeling a bit unsure.

"Thank you." He mutters in the softest of voice, which gives you the courage to turn towards him. "I'm feeling way better now, so thank you and it means a lot." He says, looking straight into your eyes.

The fear that you had of him misunderstanding you, immediately dissipates and a smile appears on your face. "Don't mind it, I'm glad I could help."

He gives you a smile in return, not a shy one but one that's rather not shy at all to show you, how grateful he is for your kindness and you find it beautiful in every possible way.

A small nudge on the palm of your hand gets your attention. Looking down, you find Minnie trying to lift your hand with her tiny little head to try to get you to pet her. Chuckling at her cuteness, you start scratching behind her ears and your heart warms at the way she closes her eyes and meows in satisfaction.

Jungkook's voice, however, makes you turn towards him again. "I, umm, just something happened that was bothering me, someone sa–"

"No, you don't have to feel obligated to tell me." Sensing where he was going with that sentence, you cut him off immediately.

He just looks down, fiddling with Juno's paws. "But you deserve to know–"

"No, I don't." You cut him off again, firmer this time. "Just because I brought you here, doesn't mean you have to tell me what's been bothering you. I brought you here and that was my choice. If you ever tell me or anyone something personal, it should be your choice and not an obligation or not because you feel like you should or have to."

Jungkook just keeps his head down and after some time nods his head, his posture which you didn't even realise had somehow stiffened, relaxes.

"Thanks." He whispers.

"You're welcome." You keep it short and simple. If by the way, his body eased immediately at the thought of not having to narrate to you about whatever it is that has been bothering him, it is pretty obvious that he doesn't feel comfortable enough to share it and you're going to respect it. Honestly, he shouldn't even be thanking you regarding it, in the very first place.

A comfortable silence falls between the two of you, except for the meows and purring.

"Can I be honest with you about something though?" Jungkook asks, breaking the silence. Seeing you nod in approval, he begins. "Mama C is a veerryyyy weird name."

"Hey! How dare you?" You exclaim, now fully turning towards him.

His eyes swirl with mischief as he exclaims back. "What? I'm just being honest."

"For your information, it's a very adorable name." You defend your choice of name, huffing.

"No, it isn't."

"That's a good joke. Haha."

"It wasn't a joke, it's the truth, duh."

"As if."

Whatever retort was on the tip of his tongue, never comes out because a hiss stops him from continuing. You both find the source to be Mama C, looking at the two of you with squinted eyes, a look that screams disapproval.

You automatically raise your hands in the air in surrender. "Okay, sorry. No more arguing about your name. Got it."

"And someone said she's not intimidating." Jungkook mumbles loudly, mimicking your pose.

"She isn't but you just made fun of her name and made her angry. Anyone would be offended."

"Well, she's clearly–"

Another hiss.

That makes the both of you quiet again.

After moments of intense staring at the two of you, she concludes that you both have shut up for good. She waddles towards you and lays down on your lap, with her head on the top of your thigh.

You swiftly turn your head towards Jungkook and slightly raise your brow in a way to say I won. He only raises his brow back in complete denial.

Riiiiinnggg.

And there goes the lunch bell.

As if knowing that you'll have to leave, Mama C slowly gets up and licks a portion of the skin that's visible between the hem of your skirt and your socks. Gently stepping out of your lap, she hisses at Milo who was now licking whatever remnants of food is left in the lunchbox. He only looks up being caught off guard.

Well with this kid around you never have to worry about any food going to waste, that's for sure.

The two of you get up and give up some goodbye scratches, which by the looks of it, are greatly appreciated.

"Next time, I want you to pay attention to me." Jungkook scolds Milo lightly. You ignore the giddiness that rises at the thought of him enjoying his time enough for him to think of a second visit.

This wasn't a blunder after all.

Bending down you collect the lunchbox when Jungkook speaks again, in a very confused tone might you add. "Umm, what is she doing?"

Facing him, you spot the source of his confusion and find extreme amusement at the sight in front of you. "Well, Minnie's trying to climb you." You snort. "That's her way of welcoming you to the family."

Jungkook's confused expression turns into one of disbelief and seconds later a burst of gleeful laughter escapes him.

This wasn't a blunder at all.

NOW

Today is Monday.

You don't know what you expected but even then to your surprise, the beginning of your day has been normal and nothing out of the usual.

Tan tried waking you up by licking all over your face but when you didn't wake up like he wanted you to, he 'scream-barked' near your ears, which made you spring up from your bed at the speed of light. When you tried scolding him for almost making you deaf, he gave you puppy eyes, because obviously.

After regaining some sense of hearing, you did your morning routine, chose a white blouse with a grey blazer and matching skirt as your outfit of the day, argued with Tae over breakfast about which out of DC and Marvel is better, left Tan at your nearest pet care centre, and then the both of you headed out.

Pretty normal.

The only thing that's been a reminder that it isn't just any other Monday, was the way Tae hugged you a little tighter and longer while whispering, it's going to be okay, before parting and making his way to the IT sector of the building.

You possibly stood there awkwardly in the middle of nowhere for some time, watching Tae's back as he walked, before finally taking a deep breath and calming yourself.

Today isn't just any other Monday but you'll deal with it.

Over the course of the week, you've accepted the fact that Jungkook is now going to be your boss. There's no denying that. But then that's just it right? He's only going to be your boss.

Honestly, from what you've heard from Tae, he's this big hot-shot of a CEO and lowkey a celebrity, whom you doubt you'll ever meet. But say, you do, even then it's only going to be once or twice and yeah maybe it would be awkward but that's okay, it would be weird if it's isn't awkward.

So yeah, as Tae said, it shouldn't be much of a problem.

And that's why you're calm, or at least way calmer than you expected yourself to be. You aren't going to lie, there's still this little anxiety at the back of your mind but that is normal and you have made peace with it.

That brings you here, in your office.

Checking the time on your wristwatch, you find it's 8:50, which means you're fairly on time.

You put down your handbag on the table and walk towards your chair to take a seat when the door of your office opens suddenly, startling you.

"Thank God you're finally here." Mina gushes, quite literally running towards you.

"Hey! Calm down, why are you in such a hurry?" A look of confusion appears on your face.

"I'm in a hurry because you have a meeting in ten minutes." She responds between shallow breaths.

Frowning, you ask, "Meeting in ten minutes? That early?"

"Yes, I got a mail that said new boss would like to have a meeting with the department heads, first thing in the morning." She explains further.

Your frown only intensifies and so does your anxiety. "New boss as in?" You ask just to be sure.

"Jeon Jungkook, duh."

Well fuck.

Really?

You're going to face Jungkook after six long years, more like you have to face Jungkook, and that too this early.

What's worrying you, even more, is the fact that he is going to know that you work here. When you left Korea, you left without a clue and you have no idea how he is going to react upon seeing you. If he–

Realising, where your thoughts are headed, you stop yourself immediately.

You're not going to waste your time, thinking about it. How he reacts is on him. You get no say on that. What matters is, you know how you're going to react.

Maybe it's too soon to see him, maybe you were totally unprepared for it, but the sooner you get over with it the better.

"Hey, you still functioning?" Mina's voice brings you back to reality.

"Sorry, I just wasn't expecting an early morning meeting but it is what is, I guess."

"I know, babe, no one likes early morning meetings buuuut it's 8:53 now and if you don't head out now, chances are, you'll be late." She informs you, tone slightly apologetic.

You hum in agreement. "Did they ask us to carry any specific files or documents?"

"Nope, not really. Just take a few sheets, I guess, in case you have to note down something."

You hum again before opening your drawer to collect a few sheets of paper and a pen. "So, I'll get going." You say, awkwardly, suddenly feeling doubtful about being in the same room as Jungkook.

"Hey, chill okay? It's all fine." It's funny how you don't even have to say but Mina automatically knows when something is bothering you.

You release a deep breath before nodding. "Thanks. Also, please just have a cup of coffee on my table when I come back."

She nods in response and with that, you finally head out.

On your way to the top floor, you can't help but notice this nervous aura radiating off from almost everyone. You feel for them, you really do. A lot of fears come along when you start working for a new company. You can only hope their fears turn out to be just that, fears and nothing else.

As the elevator door closes, you feel thankful that it's empty. Checking your reflection on the shiny reflecting doors, you feel confident about the way you look. No one would ever guess that there's anything that's running at the back of your mind and that's exactly how you prefer it.

Especially you won't ever let Jungkook know and give him the satisfaction that you indeed spent so much time of your week thinking about him. Although, they weren't the most pleasant thoughts about him but still, those thoughts somehow mean that he still kind of sort of affects you. Which is not what you want.

As the elevator door opens, you head straight out to the meeting room.

It's a huge room, to be honest. The kind of room that's simple, spacious yet slightly intimidating.

You open the door in one swift motion which makes all heads turn towards you and an awkward silence falls over the room.

Uh, okay.

You slowly close the door and take your seat, the third on the left side of the table. Sighing in relief, when the chatter resumes.

It's 8:57 and thank god you aren't late. You can only imagine how awkward it would be if you were to walk in when Jungkook was giving some sort of speech.

"Good morning Y/N." Alex, the head of the marketing department who's also sitting to your right, greets.

Turning your head towards him, you greet back. "Good morning, Alex."

"So, how are you keeping up with all this?" He waves his hand around slightly at the lack of better words.

"I don't know really, it sucks but it's not like how we feel matters, we have no say on it technically." You shrug.

"Well yeah, that is unless we–"

And the door opens.

Your head turns in sync with everyone to see Jungkook enter and your breath hitches.

When you saw him at the party, you just had a glimpse of him but now that you see him, you can't help but notice the obvious differences in him.

But what did you expect, it has been six years.

His facial features have matured, there's a very hard, calculative look on his face which you never saw on him in the past, there's this aura that he radiates which you'd otherwise find intimidating. His hair is dishevelled as if he has run his fingers through them countless number of times. He also has just overall grown a lot. He must be at least an inch or two taller than the last time you saw him, the width of his shoulder much broader.

His costly looking black suit adorns his body and by the looks of it, you possibly wouldn't find a single crease even if you tried. As his right hand comes up to fix his tie, you notice the tattoos, something you knew he always wanted but never knew he had finally gotten, and not to forget the various sliver rings on his fingers.

The sound of heels clicking against the floor makes you snap out of your trance.

Huh?

What were you doing?

This is an important meeting and were you just comparing the Jungkook that stands a few metres away, with the Jungkook that's ingrained in your mind from six years ago?

What is wrong with you?

Shaking yourself out of these thoughts and telling yourself to focus, your eyes follow the sound of heels to find a woman, in a red suit, closely following behind Jungkook.

What catches your attention, however, are her heels. They are like taaaallll, tall.

How does she walk in those? You have no idea.

"Good morning." Jungkook begins, taking his seat and you notice how his voice has turned slightly deeper, not too deep though. It's still very Jungkook, but also has this gravelly touch to it. It's the slightest of change that is noticeable but not an extreme one. You can still recognise his voice from anywhere, just like you did at the party.

"For those of you who don't know, I'm Jeon Jungkook, CEO of Jeon Corporations and this is my assistant, Miss Elene." Your eyes drift back to the woman in extra tall heels to find her standing at a distance from the chair Jungkook is sitting on. Honestly, you'd feel very awkward to be standing like that, but she looks more than okay, not minding the sudden attention on her.

"I know, the last few days might have been stressful for every one of you and that's why I called this meeting." Saying this, he makes eye contact with everyone, including you. What surprises you, is how unsurprised he looked.

Did he already know you work here? You're pretty sure by now, he already has a file that states all the names of the employees from FCS, maybe that's how he knows? Or maybe he checked the names of the people he was going to hold a meeting with? That's pretty normal and makes sense, you reckon.

"To begin with, there will be no change in positions for at least six months from now, you all will be on the same post as you were before." He gets straight to the point, with a stoic face. Seeing how Elene sports a very similar look, you wonder if that's an unspoken rule everyone working for Jeon Corporations needs to follow, to have a blank and emotionless face.

"At the end of each month, I expect both hard and soft copies of reports from each department head, on my table." Interlinking his fingers on the table surface, he leans forward. "There won't be much difference of workload from what you're used to." His eyes do a quick scan of everyone on the table.

"Though, there are some, rather small things that one needs to keep in mind while working for a company this big." The way he says these words doesn't make him calling his own company big, sound cocky, if anything they sound like he's just stating facts.

"Most of them you'll learn on your own, sooner than later, and honestly, it's for the best that you learn them by yourself. But the most important of them is, staying away from rumours." He pauses briefly to emphasise his point. "There are at least seven each day. Some if not all, are extremely misleading. Do not trust information if it's not from a reliable source, and I'd like to inform you, news channels and articles do not count as reliable."

Seeing a few head nods, he continues. "This building also will be the main branch of Jeon Corporations in the States and I'll be working and operating from here for some time. So expect a lot of unwanted media attention."

Oh?

Oh.

Ohhhhhh.

Haha. You're thoroughly fucked.

"Except for the points that I mentioned, everything is going to be the way it used to be. So I don't think any of you will face any problem but if you do, you can always reach out to Miss Elene." He leans back in his seat, before beginning again. "You will be shown a presentation and after that, if you have any questions that you want to ask, feel free to ask them."

Receiving nods of agreement from the people in the room, he signals Elene to begin the presentation, who then walks to the other side of the room, where the screen is.

As the presentation begins, you can't help but be amazed at the numbers on the screen. To say, that they are impressive would be an understatement. Jeon Corporations has made huge progress in the last few years. To be very specific, since Jungkook became the CEO.

There was this tiny part of you that was elated to know that the big, doe-eyed kid you met all those years ago got to achieve his dreams but you quickly shove those thoughts down.

Thinking about Jungkook won't do you any good.

After the presentation ends, a few rounds of questions are asked, which Jungkook answers precisely. Although you didn't have any questions, you doubt if you'd ask even if you had any.

"Any more queries?" He asks, his hard eyes roaming across the table. Being met with silence, he nods taking that as an answer. "That concludes the meeting, then."

"Welcome to Jeon Corporations."

It's surprising that the meeting ended as fast as it did. You honestly expected a lot more detailing and information being passed on but Jungkook kept it short, very to the point. He didn't start at a slow pace or gradually ease into it, no he just started talking about the things 'we should know', within five seconds of him entering the room.

You didn't expect the meeting to be so....extra professional.

Good for you, you guess. You didn't have to stay in the same room as him for long.

But one particular part of what he said has been the highlight for you.

He is going to work from here.

Aren't there other branches of Jeon Corporation in the States? Then why, just why?

Well, you know why, because the Universe had to play a sick joke on you and as a result of which, you have to see him at work every single fucking day.

Great. Just fucking great.

Your pace increases as you near your office. You feel like you will face-plant yourself and scream at the top of your lungs. Honestly, you might just need to scream to let off some steam.

But if only luck was on your side.

Just when you place your hand on the doorknob to open your office door a voice calls out for you.

Turning around, you find it to be Elene. "Yes?" You ask, with a confused frown.

"Mr. Jeon has requested you in his office." She says with a straight face.

Your brow quirks up in surprise. That bitch already has his own office in the building? This quick?

Is it wrong to call your new boss a bitch on the very first day? Probably so. Do you care? Not at all.

"Did he specify any reason?" You don't know why you asked this question it's not like it would make any difference. If he has summoned you, you have to go.

"No." Her reply comes short, but not in a way that shows impatience or annoyance.

"Well then, which room is his office?" You ask, releasing a sigh.

"The one that previously used to be Mr. Denver's room."

You only nod in response, before heading in that direction.

You were too busy cursing him in his mind to even wonder about the reason as to why he might have called you.

Just when you are about to knock on his door though, your hand pauses midway in the air.

Were you just going to walk in all frustrated? Were you going to show him you were affected?

Fuck, no you won't do that.

You might have slipped for a second, but he's not the only one who's good at putting up a business font and he's sure going to learn that.

Taking a few deep breaths, you calm yourself down and knock on the door. Hearing a faint come in, you push the door and to your surprise, Jungkook's eyes are already on you, as if he knew you were on the other side of the door.

"You called me, Mr. Jeon?"

Something very brief flashes through his eyes but it disappears just as quickly.

"Yes, please take a seat." He says in the same gravelly voice, without moving his eyes from you.

You walk towards the chair in front of his desk and take a seat, all the while maintaining eye contact with him. Maybe it's kind of silly, but if he wasn't going to back down, you aren't going to either. It's in large contrast to how you reacted to seeing him at the party, but there's no point in running away now, is there? The bare minimum you can do is to seem unbothered.

"So, how have you been?"

The question takes you by huge surprise, out of all the things you expected to come out of his mouth, you sure weren't expecting such a casual question.

But you don't let your surprise reflect on your features. "I'm sorry, Mr. Jeon but I don't get how it is any of your business." You reply, pretending to be genuinely confused.

His features harden slightly. "I haven't seen you in six years, you left without telling anyone, and now that I ask you the simplest of questions, you respond as if we are strangers." Perhaps, anyone will say that these words are that of frustration but with the way he says it in the same business-like tone, there's a part of you that finds it absurd yet hilarious.

It's a weird mix, hardened features with a relaxed, monotonous voice.

"Again, I'm sorry, Mr. Jeon, but like I said, I genuinely don't think it's any of your business after all you're my boss and I'm your employee and I'd prefer if it stayed that way." You say, your facade dropping just a little to let him know that you mean it.

His jaw clenches, his features harden even more but he still doesn't take his eyes off of you.

And neither do you, the only difference being, your features are much more relaxed, with a hint of a smile that can fool anyone into thinking that you're amused.

Seeing that he isn't saying anything else, you decide to break the tense silence. "Is there anything else, Mr. Jeon? If not, I have work to do."

And just like that, his features relax back into their regular expressionless state. "I'm sure you do and I won't keep you any longer, Miss Y/L/N."

You don't miss the way he emphasizes on miss. Although you've been addressing him as Mr. Jeon from the very moment you entered the room, he has refrained from directly using your name, but now that he did, adding the 'miss' seems to be his way of telling you, that he's going to give you what you want.

If you want to be professional, he'll be professional. If you want to pretend to be strangers, he'll pretend to be a stranger.

Giving a firm nod, you swiftly get up and leave, but on your way to the door, you feel his eyes burning holes at the back of your head.

As soon as the door closes, relief and a tiny hint of pride blooms in your chest. It went way better than you initially imagined it to be. Moreover, the last time you had a conversation with him, you were a broken sobbing mess, this time though, you didn't let him see through you.

There are certain things though which you just couldn't miss, even if you tried to.

Like, how his eyes were unreadable. Something that you didn't think was ever possible. From the very fast time that you met him all those years ago, his eyes would always reflect whatever it was that he was feeling but the long and tense eye contact you held with him in his office let you see that his eyes now had various layers to them, layers which helped him hide his emotions.

Then there was the fact that he has become so direct. First the meeting then the way he talked to you, he didn't beat around the bush at all, not even for a second. It felt like you were talking to someone who's trying to make a business deal, minus the 'convincing them' part of course, not that you wanted him to try or insist, because it would be of no use anyways, if anything it would only make you feel uncomfortable. You are glad he didn't take the conversation any further.

It's just that he's become all businessman, like.

It doesn't bother you though, it's just an observation.

But it only benefits you. If this is how Jungkook is going to be like as your boss, then it wouldn't be a problem at all. It will make your life way easier. Hell, you think you won't even notice his presence this way. He will be your boss, that's it. Nothing less, nothing more.

And currently, that's the best that you can settle for.

Taglist:

@miniiimee @its11-11mylove @jeonlovescoffee @mageprincess7 @namjooningelsewhere @unicornbabylover @drownforryou @diorggukie @koorosie @ggukkieland @joonwater @btsreader12 @shatzkrinslinzki @starbrightday @yoonchrisgull @shameless-army @mwitsmejk

Such a heartwarming and soulful fic. It reminds me of some memories I do not even have. Captivating writing. The author did an amazing job at describing the emotions of the characters. The warm summer vibe furthermore makes the fic remarkable 😍😍

An Endless Summer — jjk

S Y N O P S I S | Jeon Jungkook decided to road trip across Europe—with the money his father had sent him overseas with so he could fix his act. Then maybe, might have picked up a lost and penniless girl at a gas station in London and proceeded to road trip with her across Europe cause why the heck not?

P A I R I N G | Jeon Jungkook, reader (y/n)

G E N R E | fluff, some angst (minuscule), romance, inexplicit ~smut~ (smut nonetheless, you’ve been warned) — road trip au ; NC-17

W A R N I N G S | mild cursing

W O R D C O U N T | 19.7k (aka, the longest one ever)

Seoul, South Korea

Jeon Jungkook would’ve played the perfect part for a drama. He would’ve set a flawless example of a rich, young heir gone wild if it hadn’t been such a negative title.

Jungkook was the type of man to live life by the second and enjoy every last drop of it. There were no such things as planning ahead for him, not even a week ahead. He partied till he saw the sun barely peeking over the horizon, drank as much alcohol his system could handle, at least before blacking out, and threw money around like it was pocket change. Hell, a couple hundred thousand won to him was pocket change.

Keep reading

jungkook x ‘my universe’ mv 

bonus:

granite glow | jk

↳ words 7k

↳ genre slice of life, videographer jungkook au, marriage au, angst, fluff

How far are you willing to go, for the ones you love?

How far is ‘too far’? 

Constraints.

“Come on, sweetie!” he hopes around, jogging in place, pestering you while you shut your eyes in an attempt to divert your focal point and find an inner peace that Jungkook chases away. “Shush, I’m trying to meditate,” you darted, sitting cross-legged on the wooden bench since you both came. “Do you know that toxins are expelled faster through sweats than through excretion?” he began and you gave him death glares. 

Keep reading

jungkook being the best dad to his baby son bam 🥺 

bonus:

—amortentia.

⟶ pairing: jungkook x reader

⟶ genre: hogwarts/harry potter au / enemies-to-lovers + fluff

⟶ words: 5,486

⟶ rating: pg-13

⟶ summary: jungkook loves everything strawberry but the simple pleasure is always kept hidden, stowed away as if some hideous secret to protect the rumours that had built up around him — until a love potion outs him.

⟶ disclaimer: this is a repost of an old fic from my old blog since i know some of you were asking about it! i hope you enjoy!!

Jungkook loves strawberries.

He remembers fondly the warm summers as a child when he would go strawberry picking with his grandmother, and revels in the taste and the memory each time he bites into a fresh berry, the juices coating his tongue in sickly sweetness; he likes the smell of all the lotions and lip balms, candles and fragrances, that carried notes of the red fruit in comforting wafts, remembering distantly a time when his mother’s fruity perfume would breathe warm life into his cold house in the middle of a dull winter; he remembers sentimental times spent at the local cafe near his home, loving and basking in the way the homely and warm aroma of a freshly baked pie and the sugary tartness of strawberry lemonade would fill his nostrils and consume his senses, leaving his mouth watering. 

Jungkook loves everything strawberry but the simple pleasure is always kept hidden, stowed away as if some hideous secret to protect the rumours that had built up around him.

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our beloved summer | jjk (7.5) (m.)

You made a vow to hate Jeon Jungkook ever since he packed up and left you without a single explanation, but when he shows up at your door after years of radio silence, it turns out that maybe your resolve isn’t as strong as you thought.

pairing: producer!jungkook x songwriter!reader rating: 18+ (minors dni) genres/warnings: exes au, fluff, Angst, smut; THE REASON™️, crying because obviously there's gonna be crying, mentions of hobi leaving :(, cursing, uhm she hits him; kissing (well, of course 😂), br*ast play, t*tty s*cking, oral s*x (f. receiving), f*ngering, unprotected s*x, r*ding, cr*ampie, uhm idk i think that's it word count: 6.9k (poetic, i know) note (1): holy fucking shit i am literally shaking like a chihuahua as i'm writing this a/n. what the hell it's finally here. we've been waiting for this for almost a year and a half. TREMENDOUS thanks to Jo @daechwitatamic, Ari @wintaerbaer, and Jazz @jeonwiixard for beta-ing this for me and for reassuring me that it's not a load of crap (probably) and especially Jo for telling me if i back out she'll come kick me. frick! gaaaah. okay i'm gonna let you read or i'll go out of my mind

series masterpost / playlist ; moodboards ; taglist

as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡

I want you to smile, to feel like enough 'Cause you deserve yellow and lions and love I hope you come back when you're doing well Forgive me for being the worst of myself

New Recording 28 - Chelsea Cutler

The second the door is closed, his mouth is on yours again. 

His hand on your waist, yours in his hair, it’s similar to how it was mere minutes ago, just the urgency has increased tenfold. You want his suit off as much as you want your dress on the floor.

Jungkook detaches from your lips to let you breathe as he cages you between his body and the door, but it’s not like you can focus very well on breathing when he starts kissing down your neck, sucking bruises into your skin. His hands travel south, one palm curving around your hips to grope your ass, the other settling on the back of your thigh to lift it up, opening your legs wider so he could better slot in between them. With your leg lifted, it makes the slit in your dress ride up, exposing your core to the cool air of the room. You can feel his growing bulge pressed against you, right over your panties. 

You whimper his name when he sucks on the sweet spot on your neck, his hips grinding against you slowly.

“Yeah?” You can hear the smirk in that one simple word and the honey that drips from his voice. “What is it?”

“Want you…”

“I’m right here,” Jungkook says. His slender fingers rub you over the pink lace that you’re wearing underneath your dress, teasing your opening through the fabric for a few beats before he pushes your panties aside. “Fuck, you’re so wet.”

His breath is hot on your neck. He presses his lips against your skin absentmindedly, the tip of his index circling you but not pushing inside just yet.

“Tell me you want me too,” you pant, your arm hooking around his neck to hold him close.

“I want you.”

Truth.

You pull him in for another bruising kiss before you blindly push him further into the room, your hands roaming the broad expanse of his clothed chest. He stops when the back of his knees hit the bed.

“Hey.” Jungkook breaks away from the kiss to look at you. “Are you sure?”

If Jimin knew what you’re doing right now, he’d say that you have zero self preservation instincts.

He’d be right, though. If you had any self preservation instincts, you wouldn’t be doing this.

Your stupid, battered heart has only ever wanted him.

“I’m sure,” comes your immediate reply. It’s desperate, but you don’t have it in yourself to even care. “I’m sure. I want this. Please.”

“You were drinking.”

“I’m not drunk. I promise.”

Maybe it’d be better if you were drunk. Then you could at least blame this lapse of judgment on a pathetic state of inebriation and not on your stupid self who’s always weak for him.

He stares at you for a minute, searching for any sign of your willingness being driven by alcohol. He seems relieved when he finds none, and it isn’t until then that he shrugs off his jacket, before helping you take off his dress shirt and trousers.

You haven’t seen him like this in so long.

Every defined line on his body, accentuating every detail that you could spend hours running your fingers over.

He looks different but at the same time, not really. A tad more muscular, but still the same lean frame. Hard chest and abs on full display for you. God, your fingers are fucking twitching with the need to touch him.

Once he’s been stripped down to his boxers, he leans down to kiss you before you stop him with a hand on his chest. The lone tiger lily on his arm catches your attention.

Your fingers reach out to trace the black ink on his body, the lines delicate, your touch feather light. You’re suddenly curious. When did he get it? You can’t remember if you two ever talked about getting tattoos.

“What does it mean?” you ask. It strikes you with the realization that this is just one of the thousands of things that you missed, a reminder of your lost time. 

“Please love me,” he says, bringing his hands up to cup your face. He looks at you, just for a few seconds, before clarifying, “It means ‘Please love me,’” then kissing you again.

Jungkook clumsily and blindly searches for the dress’ zipper on your back, giving it a few impatient tugs until it finally starts gliding down your body. Your lips never part from one another as the dress falls to the floor, pooling at your feet. But once you step out of it, he does pull back to look at you from head to toe. His eyes fall to your chest, clad in a lacy pink bra that matches your panties. The look he gives you is the same one that he did when he saw you in your dress earlier today. But there’s something else in his eyes - realization, pride, perhaps a question too.

His hands are back on your body instantly, throwing you onto the bed, crawling over you like a predator. He discards your bra with ease, flinging it to the floor with the rest of your clothes. You shiver when the chilly air meets your bare chest, but the sensation quickly goes away when he takes your breast into his warm mouth. You let out a delighted sigh, arching your back to push yourself further into him as his tongue flicks over your stiff nipple. One of his hands comes up to squeeze your other breast to make sure that it isn’t neglected, rolling your pebbled bud between his thumb and forefinger. He switches to sucking your other tit after a while, then pawing at the one he just had in his mouth.

“Jungkook,” you whine his name when he makes out with your tits for too long, because there’s somewhere else that desperately requires his immediate attention. “Need you…”

He releases your nipple with a wet pop, and he looks pleased with himself when he sees that they’re thoroughly glistening with his spit. “Sorry,” he says with a chuckle. “Didn’t mean to keep you waiting.” He starts making his way down your body, kissing every inch of your skin that’s on display for him, before you put a hand on his shoulder when his face gets close to your thighs.

“What are you doing?”

He looks up at you as his fingers ghost over the fabric of your panties. “Can I?”

You lick your lips, contemplating whether or not you have the patience to wait for him. But alas, you decide, “Okay.”

Jungkook makes quick work of sliding your underwear down your legs and letting it join the pile on the floor. Even in the dim light, he can see just how wet you are, practically glittering with arousal, looking so utterly inviting that it makes his mouth water. All of this, just for him.

He doesn’t waste another second, diving right into you to lick a stripe up your dripping folds. Swiftly burying two fingers into your heat, he doesn’t stop until he’s knuckles deep. Your lips part in a silent but delighted moan. You forgot how good he used to make you feel. Your fingers could never feel as good as his, not thick enough to stretch yourself open and not long enough to reach deep inside of you.

“Fuck,” you drawl, your eyes fluttering shut when the tip of his tongue meets your throbbing clit, teasing it until you’re practically grinding against his face. You thread a hand into his hair, gripping his dark locks until he’s groaning, sending blissful vibrations all throughout your body. The figure 8’s that his tongue draws on your clit sets you alight, sends you into a whole other dimension completely as pleasure courses through your veins. 

“So good,” he mumbles. To you? To himself? You can’t tell, but that doesn’t really matter. “Still so good.”

You hear it, just how soaked you are, as he begins thrusting his digits in and out of you. He strokes your walls delicately with each press of his fingers, scissoring you open for what you know is to come. 

His tongue dips into your entrance then, teases your dripping hole as you pant heavily, 

Your legs close in on his head as the orgasm nears, but he keeps your thighs apart, firmly holding them open as he makes you unravel.

This is fucking unreal - Jungkook with his whole face tucked between your legs, desperate to make you come with his talented mouth. You never would have anticipated this when you woke up this morning.

No, just a while ago you were crying by yourself down at the beach. Now you’re crying out his name as he smothers himself in you.

Once he starts curling them inside of you, it’s embarrassing how fast you come. You clench hard around his fingers as the orgasm washes over you, dripping down his fingers and he uses the added wetness to carry you through the high.

“Jungkook…” you whimper, sounding completely fucked out even though it’s only just beginning. After a while, the heightened pleasure fades into the background, and he presses soft kisses against your inner thigh.

He crawls his way up your body until he’s facing you again. You watch his fingers and the way they’re coated in your juices, wondering what he’ll do with them next. Jungkook languidly smears the wetness all over your lips like he’s carefully painting them, only to kiss you afterward. When you moan against him, he takes the opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth. Your hand finds its way into his boxers then, wrapping your fingers around his hardened length, pumping him in your fist until he’s shallowly rutting against you.

The kiss gets broken when he suddenly pulls away, realization dawning on him. “Shit,” he exclaims. “I don’t have a condom.”

“Oh.” You blink at him, then you both just look at each other for a while. This isn’t a problem with no solution, even if the solution is a disastrous one in hindsight. You just want him, so badly that you can’t think of anything else.

He waits for you, doesn’t dare say anything else until you do.

Yet again, the opportunity presents itself for you to stop.

But you’ve already gone this far, and though it’s damn near impossible, you want him even more than you did before.

“Are you clean?” you ask.

It’s evident that he’s surprised by the way his eyes widen, and his silence that follows for the next half a minute. “Yeah,” he tells you.

“Okay. Then we don’t need a condom.”

He says your name once, his fingers brushing your hair away from your face sweetly. You always did like your name best when it used to fall from his lips so softly. “Are you sure?” he asks.

“I’m sure. I promise.”

Jungkook sucks in a breath, like he’s steadying himself, before he rids himself of the remaining piece of clothing on his body, then settles between your legs again. This time, his cock rests directly on your bare pussy. The anticipation makes it harder for you to breathe, makes you squeeze your thighs around his waist to not let him leave.

“How long has it been?”

Your answer is vague. “Too long,” you say. You don’t want to tell him that there’s been no one else since him, but you have a feeling that he understands it anyway. You think that he’d be pleased with your answer, that maybe it would boost his ego in a way, but there’s only a certain sadness that settles in his eyes. 

“Okay.” Regardless, he pushes past the sudden gloom that befalls his features, blinking away the disheartenment swimming in his irises, to align himself with your entrance. He rubs his cock against your pussy to coat you in his precum, even though you yourself are certainly more than wet enough for him to slide home easily. “Ready?”

“Yes,” you confirm, bracing your hands on his shoulders as he eases the tip into you, making the both of you moan at the contact. You feel him, all of him.

For a second, you wonder if he has ever forgone protection with anyone else, or if it’s only ever been just you.

Jungkook takes one of your hands off his shoulder to lay it flat on the bed next to your head, lacing your fingers together, giving your hand a slight squeeze. “Breathe. You can do it.”

“Give me a minute.”

“We’ve got time,” he says, his voice smooth like velvet.

“Can you kiss me?” you ask, almost like you’re shy even though he’s balls deep inside of you.

He chuckles lightly, so endeared by you and your silly question.

His lips meet yours sweetly, like doing so would help make the stretch less painful. Maybe it does, at least a little bit. 

You can feel his cock throbbing inside of you, and he’s probably trying so hard to hold back, but he keeps kissing you nonetheless.

“You can move,” you say after a while.

“I’ll go slow, okay?”

“Okay.”

He rears his hips back, slowly, then thrusts forward again. You whimper from the slight burn, but it’s nothing you can’t handle. His movements are gentle for the next couple of minutes or so, and it isn’t until you start opening up more that he sets a steadier pace. Even when he starts to fuck you faster, one of his hands is still on your hips, rubbing your skin soothingly. 

“Fuck,” Jungkook grunts out, followed by a sigh of your name as he pumps into your cunt, every ridge and vein of his cock dragging deliciously in and out of your walls. “You feel so good.”

He gazes down at you as he moves, and there’s just something so intimate about it that it makes you want to cry again.

You know what it’s like to have him fuck you, and this isn’t it.

No, this is something else entirely.

I love you, you think. I love you so fucking much.

“Missed you.” His words come out hushed, caught in half a moan, half a whimper. “Missed you so fucking much.”

“Did you think about me?”

“Always,” he says, without even missing a beat.

“No,” you clarify. “When you were sleeping with other people, did you think about me?”

“I only thought about you.” His hips stutter as he tells you this, like he’s confessing to something that he shouldn’t. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

You never admitted this to anyone, not even Taehyung even though he probably sensed it, but you used to feel like you could be physically sick just looking at the photos on his feed every time you’d lurk on a drunken night. They were never flashy, just subtle enough for you to know that there was someone. It made you nauseous, because the place next to him was always supposed to be yours.

You just stare at him, not knowing how to process this bit of information. Sure, it’s an ego boost. There’s some pride in knowing that you were the one on his mind even if you weren’t together.

He’s so utterly gorgeous like this that you can’t form a single coherent thought, too lost in the way his eyes bore into yours and in the blossoming warmth that spreads all over your chest from hearing his words.

How did he manage to get even more beautiful? Sculpted by the gods. The standard for all men.

“What is it?” he asks when you stare at him for too long.

“I…” You blink away the daze. “I wanna be on top.”

“Okay.”

Jungkook slips out of you just long enough to get seated with his back against the headboard and pull you into his lap. You hover over him, letting his tip rub against your dripping hole for a moment before you sink onto him. You tip your head back and sigh as you envelope him fully again, the only difference is that you can feel him so much deeper like this.

He grabs your ass with both hands, kneading your skin as he helps you ride him. The sounds that you make together are downright obscene, bouncing off the walls, ringing in your ears.

“Harder,” you tell him shakily. “Don’t wanna hurt you.”

“I want it to hurt,” you say, holding onto him like you’re bracing for impact, because you know he’ll give you what you want. “Make it hurt.”

Jungkook sighs once, then digs his heels into the mattress to steady himself before his hips go wild, thrusting into you with such force that it nearly has you sobbing, your head falling onto his shoulder. It makes you burn with pleasure, like a star before it becomes a supernova. When the tension starts building quickly, you can’t help but slam your hips down harder to meet his thrusts, to chase that high.

You press your lips against his skin, any spot you could find - his jaw, his neck, his shoulder. “Tell me you love me.”

The words are ready on the tip of his tongue, like he’s been waiting for an opportunity to say it. He doesn’t miss a single beat as he tells you, “I love you.”

“Mean it.”

“I do mean it. I love you.”

Truth.

For some sick and twisted reason, his words send you crashing over the edge, falling into that abyss of pleasure that you’ve been searching for. You say his name, over and over again, like you’re making up for all the years that he wasn’t around to hear it.

Your walls convulse wildly around him as you cry out, your toes curling, your thighs shaking. He holds you close, thrusting into you through your orgasm until you’re dizzy, like you could actually pass out from the overwhelming bliss.

“I’m close,” he tells you in a raspy voice.

You catch your breath long enough to say, “Come for me.”

“Where do you want it?”

“Inside,” you say without much thought. If you were in a clearer state of mind, you would know that it’s reckless and stupid. You’re not on birth control, and if anything were to happen, you would have no one to blame but yourself.

But you aren’t in a clear state of mind, and maybe this is even more dangerous than if you were fueled by alcohol. At least you can sober up from alcohol.

You just want him so badly that rationality seems like a luxury you can’t afford right now.

“Y/N,” he whispers shakily, though there’s a warning edge to his voice that you understand.

“I want you to come inside me. I want it. I want it so bad. Please.”

Jungkook groans at your answer. 

He doesn’t ask you to look at him, instead choosing to hide his face against your neck where you feel something wet glide down your skin as he grips your hips. It’s followed by a sniffle, and hands that hold onto you like you’re a lifeline. 

He’s crying, and that breaks your fucking heart.

You don’t know what to do. Part of you wants to tilt his chin up to look at you, because it feels strange without his tender gaze on you, but you decide against it even though the tips of your fingers tingle with the need to do so. 

Your walls clench with purpose, squeezing around him, trying to help you get there. It’s not that long before you hear your name falling from his lips in a choked out moan, so needy and beautiful and makes you nostalgic. He empties himself inside of you, making you shudder from the sudden warmth that he paints along your walls.

You stay in the same position for a few more minutes until your chest is no longer heaving with exhaustion and euphoria. He gently pulls you off his lap to lay you down on the bed, pressing an apologetic kiss against your bare shoulder when you wince from the oversensitivity, from any kind of movement at all. 

When he moves to throw on his boxers and goes to stand up, you reach for him. “Where are you going?” You instantly feel pathetic for asking.

He pauses, then squeezes your hand as that sadness from before makes an appearance in his eyes again. “I’m just going to the bathroom,” he tells you, his voice quiet.

The relief on your face must be visible. “Okay,” you say. Rationally, you know he probably wouldn’t fuck you and leave you the second the deed is done. But again, rationality is a luxury at the moment.

Jungkook returns a couple of minutes later with a warm cloth, and dabs it between your legs to clean you up. You grimace when he touches you there, evidently sore already from the activities you just engaged in.

“Sorry,” he’s quick to say, though it isn’t really his fault. Or maybe it is his fault. You’re not sure if that even matters.

When he’s done, he gets under the covers with you. “Come here,” he says, then shuffles your body closer to his until he’s holding you with his hands on your bare waist. He leans down to kiss you, and you let him. God, you feel like you’re fucking melting.

It’s different from the kiss down at the beach, and it’s different from the needy ones you shared in the past hour. It’s soft and slow and easy, like there’s nothing for you to worry your pretty little head about.

Jungkook breaks away eventually, and rests his forehead against yours then. One of his hands on your waist slides up to your ribs, until his thumb could brush the underside of your breast. The touch is gentle, sweet, completely innocent.

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispers. He means everything he tells you. “You’re perfect.”

You even blush, like you’re a stupid lovesick teenager. “Tell me,” you say.

“Anything.”

You reckon it’s self-indulgent at this point. You’re only asking to feel better about your place in his life, or rather, the place that used to be yours.

“Tell me you can’t live without me.”

He nudges his nose against yours. No hesitation. “I can’t live without you.”

Truth. You know it’s the truth.

Nonetheless… “Liar.” Your tone is soft. There’s no bite at all. You touch his face, trying to commit to memory every detail, how his soft skin feels under your touch as if it’s the last time you’ll ever get to see him like this. Maybe it is. You never got to have a last time with him, never got to know that it was ending before it already ended. You’re not thinking about the morning because you don’t want to, but the seed of anxiety is there in your belly. Your fingers trace his jawline as you say, “You lived without me. You were doing fine without me.”

His lips ghost over your cheek. “It wasn’t much of a life,” he says. “I couldn’t bear it without you.”

The thing is, you know that he’s being honest. And it should make you feel good that you affected him as much as he affected you.

But then… it keeps leading you back to that question. The question that you thought you could go the rest of your life without knowing the answer to. But for that to be possible, you needed him to stay gone, stay out of your world forever.

He shouldn’t be here, tangled up in the sheets with you and kissing you like his life depends on it. 

He shouldn’t tell you that he misses you, that he loves you. Shouldn’t tell you to please, love him too.

It’s contradictory, isn’t it? You needed to never see him again if you stood a chance of moving on with your life. You needed it and yet, all you wanted was to have him back by your side.

The tattoo catches your attention again. It feels like it’s laughing at you, mocking you.

You clench your teeth once, your eyes beginning to turn glassy. Jungkook sees it, and he’s quick to break up your train of thought. He presses his mouth to yours, shushing you with a deep kiss that makes your head spin, despite it all.

“Don’t think about it,” he mumbles against your lips, so desperate to get you to stop. As if he can sense where this could lead.

“How could I not? I don’t know who you are anymore.”

“You know me.” He holds onto your wrist, to keep your hand on his face before you can pull it away. “I’m still the same.”

“No, you’re not,” you say quietly, absentmindedly.

“Yes,” he insists. “Yes, I am.”

Maybe that’s true. Maybe you do see the person you used to know. But you only ever see him in glimpses and it always leaves you with a terrible, nauseous feeling afterward.

He doesn’t understand how much it hurts you to catch glimpses of the boy you used to love - the boy you still love - only to realize that maybe that isn’t the person he wants to be anymore. It feels like he keeps trying to kill that version of himself, like he despises the person who meant the world to you.

Are you gone forever?

Come back quietly.

“How old are you?” you ask after a moment.

The question makes him pause, his soft features twisting in confusion. He leans back a bit, so his eyes could focus on your face better.

“What?”

“How old are you?” you repeat.

It takes him another while to answer as he tries to see where you’re going with this. But when his search comes up empty, he just answers, “29.”

"I don't know who you are at 29. The last time I knew you was 24. No. You hadn't even turned 24 yet. Where was 25? 26? 27? 28? It’s unfair that you still know who I am when I don't know who you are. I feel like I never aged a day past 24. You carried on living but I'm still here."

His eyes well up once again, but this time, you can see it. The first tear spills over, lands somewhere on your collarbone. This is what you used to want, right? To see him hurting, just like how you were hurting? Well, be careful what you wish for.

No part of you feels victorious that you’re making him cry, that the score is finally being settled, because none of this undoes all of the shit you had to go through. If anything, it makes you feel even worse, like you’re still losing.

“I never moved on from us. I couldn’t move on from you,” he says, voice cracking toward the end. Your heart is doing the same thing in your chest, but you’re glad that he can’t see it. “I swear I miss you every day. I wanted you with me every day. You have no idea how much I wanted to come back to you.”

Jungkook looks so dejected, like a reflection of you these past few years. You recognize that look in his eyes. You know that sadness all too well. He was in as much pain as you were.

He loved you when he left you. He still loves you even after all this time. 

You inhale shakily. For the first time, you feel infinitely selfish for only focusing on your own misery without even stopping to give him the benefit of the doubt, to consider the possibility that maybe letting you go wasn’t something he wanted. Maybe he isn’t the antagonist that you spent years making him out to be.

There’s more to it, and you need to know.

“Then why did you leave me?”

Graduation was just shy of a month ago, and two weeks before that was Hoseok’s flight when he left you all behind.

You and Jungkook, along with Taehyung and Jimin had gone to see him off at the airport. Of course you did, you were his best of friends after all. The goodbye was full of jokes accompanied by sniffles, and tears that overflowed without permission because you all agreed that you would hold yourself together for Hoseok. Jimin was probably the one who cried the most, even though inside, you were equally sad to see your friend leave.

A part of your life was ending, and that in and of itself was depressing enough already, but you thought at least the whole group would still be together and start the next chapter by each other’s side.

Nonetheless, it wasn’t the end of the world. All of you could still make it work, even if it wasn’t the most ideal of situations. You promised to keep in touch, promised to message the group chat every day and have video calls every weekend. You were still kids, and kids tend to be optimistic like that.

What none of you could see coming was how everything would fall apart in a matter of mere weeks.

Jungkook thinks that decades from now, when he’s old and gray and helpless, he still won’t be able to forget that day.

He should’ve been more concerned when your mother contacted him out of nowhere, asking him to meet with her, asking him not to let you know where he was going.

He’d shown up half an hour early to the cafe where they were supposed to meet, just because he didn’t want to risk being late and have your mother disapprove of him even more. Not once had she expressed anything other than disdain toward your relationship, but you’d always told him it didn’t matter, that you were the only person who could decide what to do with your life, not anyone else, let alone your mother. He always believed you back then, even if deep down, he still wanted her to see that he was enough for you. Her unattainable approval still mattered to him.

Jungkook spent thirty whole minutes running on nothing but anxiety and caffeine. That was probably his first mistake, ordering a cup of coffee which only made him more nervous than he already was.

When your mother arrived, it barely took her any time at all to get right into what she came here to say. She hadn’t even bothered with a drink.

Was that how it was always going to end? Should he have seen it coming from the beginning? Was he the only one who thought it would be you and him all the way until the very end?

Maybe he was more of a hopeless romantic than he thought.

It was the way she had called him a phase that she hoped you’d grow out of. That she had let you keep this relationship for long enough, but now that you’d graduated - now that you’d be starting a life for yourself - she couldn’t sit back and watch you throw it all away for a boy who could never give you what you deserved.

It was the way she told him she didn’t want history to repeat itself. How she didn’t want to subject you to the same fate that she and your father had to suffer through. How she had left your dad because in the end, he wasn’t enough for her and you, even though you were a child and you deserved to grow up with a father and with love.

She said the same thing would happen to you and Jungkook, because you were meant for greater things and he was not meant to deserve you. She made it clear that he would always hold you back, that he would never amount to even a fraction of what you should receive in life.

“If you love her, you would let her go.”

Cliché, right? Like the kind of stuff you only ever see in movies? Well, movies have to take inspiration from somewhere.

He thought about his own mother then, and about how people could have such different ways of showing love. He believed that your mother loved you, and he still believes that. She wouldn’t have gone through the trouble of seeing him if she didn’t care about you. She wanted the best for you, and that wasn’t him.

She didn’t have to tell him to keep it a secret from you, because he wouldn’t have told you regardless. He was well aware of how strained your relationship with your mother was, and letting you know would only drive it closer to the edge. She knew he wouldn’t tell you. He loved you, and that was the one thing that she could count on.

Just sitting there in that café, Jungkook felt like all of the air had been sucked out of the room, even though he was surrounded by the other patrons and their lively laughter as they chatted away. The pitiful way that your mother kept looking at him forced him to learn what it was like to feel truly worthless.

The pity in her eyes only intensified when he couldn’t even say a single word in response, couldn’t think of anything to defend himself.

Silence meant agreement, and that was what he chose. Jungkook - the naive boy that he was - stopped believing in you. He’d believed her instead.

He was just a kid, what else was he supposed to do? 

She was your own flesh and blood, and he knew nothing could ever replace that. He would rather let you hate him, resent him for the rest of your life, than let you lose your family.

That day, he lied to you for the first time ever, saying he couldn’t come over because he was tired. The sunflowers he bought for you just hours prior ended up dying on his windowsill.

He wouldn’t see you again for a few more days, then for months afterward.

July was supposed to represent a blossoming summer, but all he could remember was the dreadful promise of a winter that would inevitably come.

You call his name when he takes too long to answer. “Tell me.”

“I love you,” he merely says. His hand brushes your cheek.

You frown, despite the way the three words make your chest tingle.

“I love you,” he says it again, trying to ease the furrow between your brows.

“That’s not what I asked.”

“I’m sorry.”

His voice is soft, barely even audible, but it’s this gentleness that makes his words ricochet, ringing in your ears loudly like a gun going off in the quiet of your room.

Again with the apologies.

Fuck this.

It’s hard to take it to heart when you don’t even know what he’s apologizing for.

You gave Jungkook the chance to explain himself, but if he doesn’t take it, then that’s not on you. There isn’t much else that you can do.

You swallow hard, then shove him off of you so you could get out of the bed. Your legs instantly tremble as you attempt to stand, but you soldier on as you put on your bra and underwear, then grab your dress from where it lays abandoned on the floor. You’re shaking, but it’s difficult to determine if it’s because you’re angry, or cold without his warmth nearby.

He’s quick to his feet too, rushing toward you before you could leave.

“Don’t touch me,” you hiss when he reaches for your arm. He doesn’t listen, because when has Jeon Jungkook ever fucking listened?

“Y/N, wait-”

“Wait for what?! I asked you a simple question and you can’t even answer me.”

He runs a hand over his face frustratedly, clearly torn over something. He holds your angered gaze, but the way he looks at you is much milder, gentler even if it’s equally frustrated. “I’m trying to protect you.”

You don’t know if it’s the wrong answer or not. You just know that in this moment, it irritates you to no end.

“Oh my god,” you gasp mockingly. “Someone is trying to kill me.”

“What?”

“Someone is trying to kill me. Someone is waiting outside that door right now, waiting for me to come out so they can kill me. Holy fucking shit, I’m about to be assassinated.”

“Y/N, I’m serious.”

There’s that burning sensation behind your eyes again. “And you think I’m not? What do you mean you’re trying to protect me? Protect me from what? Do you think this is a fucking k-drama? Jesus Christ,” you scoff harshly. “What do you want from me? What the actual fuck do you want?”

Jungkook aims for you again, and in an attempt to ward him off, your swinging fist inadvertently collides with his chest. The dress falls to the floor again, laying next to your feet, that useless piece of fabric.

It probably doesn’t do much damage to him, but he’s a bit startled regardless. So are you, if you’re being honest. But you do it again, and surprisingly, he lets you.

“You coward.” You shove hard at his chest, making him stumble backward. “You unbelievable asshole. You fucked me, you said you loved me, and you still can’t tell me why you left me.” 

He allows you to push him until his back is pressed against the wall. And even then, you don’t relent. Your fists continue beating against his chest as you start sobbing, spilling ‘I hate you’s in between so many expletives it could make his grandmother faint.

He might bruise in the morning.

You hope he bruises in the morning.

The least Jungkook could do is bruise for you.

You want him to curse him out for so many things - for loving you, for leaving you, for not even having the balls to tell you why he broke your heart. For coming back to remind you that you still love him. For proving that he still has you in the palm of his hands, and every twitch of his finger can make you feel like the walls are crumbling down on you.

But even as you tell him how much you hate him, you’re still thinking: Come back. I don’t want to keep losing you. Come back to me.

Because he’s the only person who can hurt you like this. When you think about him, it used to make you so depressed that you could hardly function. There’s no other way to put it to make it sound less pathetic. That’s just how it is.

You shouldn’t have agreed to this weekend, shouldn’t have been nice to him, shouldn’t have let him convince you not to think about it. You shouldn’t have opened the door for him in the first place, because there was always a part of you that knew he could get under your skin so easily just like that.

This wasn’t your second chance at holding onto him. It wasn’t a do-over. It was a re-enactment.

The years haven’t made you wiser, that much is clear.

You don’t know how long this goes on for, but at some point, you begin to wear yourself out. Your movements start to slow and the energy to violently sob leaves your body until you’re nearly collapsing. Jungkook catches you when you don’t have the strength to hold yourself up anymore. Why are you always so fucking helpless?

“You just…” Your voice gets caught at the end of a sob. This is rock bottom all over again. “You make me so sad.”

You grasp his arm weakly, feeling like your own lungs are failing you. You can’t breathe. It’s too much, too infinitely humiliating. He’s doing this to you again, and this time you have to shoulder most of the blame, because you are the one that enabled your own heartbreak for the second time.

You’re still crying, and you hate that this is the first time he’s ever seen you cry like this.

“I’m trying to protect you,” he says firmly, looking at you like he’s trying so hard not to break down alongside you. “Please, I’m so sorry.” The words come out as a whisper now. You can feel the tremble in his voice and the shake of his hands where they hold you. His big bambi eyes - the usual home of constellations - now house tears that threaten to spill onto his supple cheeks. “Please. What can I do to make you believe me?”

It’s those stupid fucking eyes. It’s your stupid fucking self.

“You need to tell me.” Your tears keep on falling no matter how much he tries to wipe them away. “I can’t take it anymore.”

“It’ll make things worse,” he tells you, his voice cracking as he does. He sounds like he means it, and maybe he does believe that whatever he’s hiding from you will only hurt you more. It almost has you caving, but you can’t do this a second time. You’re exhausted, both physically and emotionally. In the morning, you’ll think about how this is all so dramatic, the way you’re acting right now. The most k-drama-esque thing that has ever happened to you. But in the moment, you just feel like someone plunged a knife in your chest, and they keep twisting it, twisting and twisting,...

In the end, you decide that it’s a risk you’ll have to take, because nothing can be more painful than the absolute hell he’s putting you through. He’ll never understand how utterly excruciating it is to experience this kind of heartbreak.

“If you don’t tell me now, I won’t be able to survive you again.”

up next...

our beloved summer (08) ⏤ aka the JK centric chapter

all rights reserved © jeonqkooks. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted september 30, 2023]

dextrocardia | 08

Dextrocardia. Originally a medical term, but also a way to describe someone who's got their heart in the right place.

"She's been moved to another operation to help out. This pairing is necessary because you'll be undercover as spouses. I know you two can be professional about this."

"What?!" It's Jeongguk's upset voice that sounds, and for once, you share his displeased opinion.

Spouses.

pairing: cop!jk x f detective!reader

genre: undercover cops, fake marriage, e2l au, angst, fluff, smut

word count: 6.3k

warnings: a lot of talk about assault of different kinds (sexual included), harrassment, sexism, there's blood and very serious injuries, trauma heavy. if you feel very bothered reading stuff like that, please skip this <3

rating: NC-17 – Adults Only

masterlist

part 8/? 

<previous | next>

© dextrocardia is copyright jeonstudios. this fic can not be modified, re-posted, or translated without my permission.

“Answer me. You’re a double agent?!”

You’re too terrified to be embarrassed by the way you’re trembling, sitting on the floor in your pair of black cotton shorts and gray t-shirt, pressing your back against the wall furthest from the door. Not that nor the tears that start to wet your lashes and soon enough roll down your cheeks.

Despite not being too surprised, you’re obviously not any less scared.

“Please don’t,” you beg, your vision starting to become blurry from tears, “you don’t have to do this. Please, Jeongguk.”

You focus on the silhouette of him, the dark blue dress shirt and black pants. “I know what I did was wrong, I know, but I didn’t know what else to do. He was pressing t–too hard, and I couldn’t breathe.”

Tears and fear block your throat, and your heart beats a thousand beats a minute, but you try your best to get the words out, try to convince him even though you know it’s a lost cause.

“I know I’m not im–important or pretty, but I didn’t want to die. What was I supposed to do? My hand slipped out, and I–I just reached for his g–gun.” 

Wiping the tears with your wrist, you see how he changes tactics, the way Jeongguk’s eyes have gone from furious to looking worried. How he’s put on his acting face.

“What… what are you talking about?” he asks, voice void of any anger as he takes another step toward you. “I didn’t mean to raise my voice or scare you, I’m sorry, but what… are you talking about?”

Quickly reaching for the razor blade in your bra, you accidentally cut your finger when you remove the blade from its case. Blood drips down your hand as you raise it in a pathetic warning.

“Don’t come any closer,” you try to sound confident, but maybe it is a bit embarrassing how your voice shakes and your hand is so unsteady that you have to support it with the other. “Please, just let me go, Jeongguk? I’m pulling the report, and I’ve apologized. If you let me go, I’ll disappear tonight, okay? You won’t ever have to see me again.”

Your gaze is drawn to the knife still gripped by his veiny hand, and so is his. A second later, he tosses the knife to the other side of the room where it hits the floor with a clinking sound and looks to bounce underneath the bed, closer to you than him, as if he wouldn’t still be able to reach it before you.

“What… report?” he asks, sinking down to one knee, still only a few steps into the room. “What are you talking about?”

But you’re not fooled by those pretty eyes, and it frustrates you how he thinks he can look at you softly and have you forget everything. It lives permanently in the back of your mind. The threats, the attempts, the fear, and now ultimately, the defeat.

“Stop pretending, Jeongguk,” you plead, sniffling. “We both know what this is. If you’re going to do it, just… get it over with. Please. Don’t play with me like this.”

Like he’s thinking hard, maybe even realizing something, his eyes lose focus, and he stands up.

“You’re talking about Hoseong, aren’t you?”

You’re quiet—well, as quiet as a crying, pathetic mess can be—when he looks down at you. You’re not sure what it is that he’s hoping for, if it’s for you to lower your guard and vulnerably crawl into his arms or if he’s deliberately trying to provoke you to get a reaction that he can answer. You meet his eyes with your razor blade slowly lowered, and he waits for something, his eyes searching yours for answers he already knows. But you can’t give them, and he backs out of the room with you still trembling on the floor.

Raindrops smatter against the windshield as Jeongguk drives toward the city.

His phone dings with a text, and he raises it, reading the preview.

He sets his course toward a more specific goal. A bar.

It’s long since dark when he steps out of the car, locking it behind him and looking around. It took him around forty-five minutes to reach the well known destination, and he spent them all in silence, his thoughts loud enough.

The wet pavement reflects light from the streetlights and a few neon signs, and Jeongguk walks with determined steps up to the door and pushes it open, placing the car keys into his breast pocket for easy access.

Inside, it’s busy as usual. People are sitting in booths or on bar stools around round tables or the bar itself, and they’re laughing, chatting loudly and singing along to the music.

Not long after entering, Jeongguk spots them. His friends. There’s three of them, sitting around a circular table.

“JK, hey!” Seunghwan calls, alcohol evident in his flushed cheeks.

Jeongguk nods in a neutral greeting, coming to stand before their table. Hoseong tips his bottle of beer slightly to the side, looking at him curiously. 

“Thought you were shipped out? How’s it going?” he speaks loudly over the music. “Can’t believe you got her to apologize, man,” he grins, leaning back.

“Had to ask you a few things,” Jeongguk answers at the same volume, finding it harder than he thought to keep his emotions at bay, “about her, actually.”

 Hoseong and Ryung both raise their eyebrows, but Jeongguk continues. “I want to know what happened that night. When you got shot.”

Although looking surprised, Hoseong still lets a smile pull on his lips. “Well, I fucked her. You know that, and she got pissed because I wasn’t interested in being her boyfriend.”

Seunghwan chuckles, but Jeongguk doesn’t find it funny.

“You ‘fucked her?’” he repeats. He knew that, but this time, he’s looking at the situation in a new light. 

“Yeah, I fucked her,” Hoseong shrugs, toning it down just a tad, like he’s suspecting where Jeongguk is taking the conversation.

“Well, did she want you to ‘fuck her?’ Did she threaten you with the gun because you turned her down, and you were shot by accident?” Jeongguk stares at the person he thought was his friend. “Or was it intentional?”

For about two seconds, Hoseong just looks at Jeongguk like he’s… assessing something, and Jeongguk isn’t sure how the man in front of him will react.

But he leans back again, rolling his eyes lightheartedly. “Oh, come on, man, don’t be like that. You know how women are these days, they want to be tied up and fucked, but when you don’t want her to call you ‘sweetie pie’ and hold hands, they scream ‘rape.’”

Jeongguk holds his breath for a second, trying to keep his cool. He looks around at the unsuspecting environment. “Let’s talk outside, I can barely hear you in here.”

Before he turns on his heel, heading back toward the exit, he sees Hoseong stand from the barstool nonchalantly.

It doesn’t rain anymore, and the outside air is a lot colder than the sweaty atmosphere inside. Somehow, the difference in sound level makes the situation all that more real. Jeongguk walks away from the entrance to give them some privacy, not to be nice but to maximize his chances of getting the entire story.

“You forced yourself on her, didn’t you?” he turns around, putting his clenched fists in his pockets. Hoseong and Ryung followed, but Seunghwan stayed behind. “You tied her up in the hotel room you were staked out in for that case, and you raped her. She got free and shot you in self-defense. Am I getting close?”

“You’re overreacting, dude. You know she was in love with me, right?”

Jeongguk feels his anger and frustration grow, but he tries to keep calm. “I knew that she loved you, yes, but it doesn’t mean she automatically wanted to sleep with you. She filed a report too, didn’t she? What happened with that?”

Hoseong shrugs indifferently, and it’s unclear if he doesn’t know or doesn’t care. Or maybe he just doesn’t want Jeongguk to know. Jeongguk shakes his head in disbelief and turns around. He needs to leave before he does something stupid.

Ryung calls his name, but Jeongguk is already walking back to the car briskly. He gets into the driver’s seat, slams the door shut, and starts the car, and when he glances back in the rearview mirror, he sees the people he thought he knew standing close together, talking. They’re looking his way.

The drive back is tortuous and slow. Jeongguk navigates back out of the city with ease, but then he’s stuck on the freeway with nothing and no one else but himself and his thoughts. He’s been living a lie ever since he started his current job, and slowly but surely, his brain puts all the pieces together. The pieces he has—some, he’s certainly still missing.

In a fit of rage and despair, he gives the steering wheel three harsh and undeserved hits with his palm, the horn blaring each time.

“Oh, God,” he whispers, shutting his eyes for a microsecond. What has he done? What has he done, what the fuck has he done?

He bites his lip, reaching for the phone he threw onto the passenger side, his eyes alternating between the road and Google, where he’s searching for a phone number.

Your limbs are frozen and your senses both feel like they’re hyper tuned to your surroundings and numb all at once. You don’t know when Jeongguk left–actually, you’re not even certain that he did leave. Sure, you heard the door close and the car drive off, but he could’ve parked it a few houses down and snuck back inside somehow, waiting somewhere in the dark for you to lower your guard. Somewhere in the back of your mind, you hear Fenrir bark, but all you can focus on is that dark doorway.

Then, you hear sounds. A car door, then the front door. Fenrir stops barking, and your worry grows. Then, there are steps, and someone is coming for you. Is it Jeongguk? Or did he leave you to one of his friends? Is it Hoseong? Unable to stop them, tears start to flow again. You promised yourself you’d meet your end with at least a bit of dignity, but you’re not that brave, evidently.

It’s Jeongguk who appears in the doorway, his hair and clothes slightly wet. You look behind him, waiting for the rest of his colleagues to come into view, but they don’t.

“Hey,” he greets quietly, looking like he’s trying to appear non-threatening, but you remember hearing him promise his friends to put you in your place, show you that it’s a man’s world you’re living in. 

Put an end to it. He’s certainly tried before.

You press yourself impossibly closer to the wall as he takes another step into the room. You’ve cheated death four times–that you know of–but you won’t be able to this time.

“I’m not going to hurt you, okay?”

It doesn’t matter that his brown eyes look kind and soft, they’re not, and he doesn’t care for you. He thinks you’re ugly, doesn’t think anyone could ever want or love you. He only cares about him, his friends, and their pride. He thinks that you should’ve died that night, and he made you apologize for surviving.

Now he’s just playing with his food. 

“Stop, don’t come any closer. I’m warning you,” you panic, raising the blade again.

Jeongguk stops, and his eyes land on your other hand, on the nick in the skin of your ring finger. “You’re still bleeding.”

He takes another slow step, and another. You keep your terrified eyes on him, but you’re sure he can tell that with every step of his, your trembling worsens.

“Please stop playing this game with me,” you plead, tears rolling down your cheeks. He won, they all did, can’t he just put you out of your misery?

“I’m not playing. Here, let me look at your finger.”

He’s so close now that he sinks to one knee and holds his hand out. You’re still gripping the razor blade, but he obviously doesn’t think you’ll actually cut him. You don’t make any move to let him see the hand you’ve put in your lap, so as slow as he can, Jeongguk reaches for it, himself.

You don’t have the courage to fight him. Logically, you know it’s your skin that’s freezing cold, probably due to shock, but his skin is burning against you when he grabs your hand. He must feel every little tremble as well. You shut your eyes. It helps not seeing him, but you still smell him, feel him around you.

“I can’t hurt you. You knew that,” your shaky mess of a voice states your discovery quietly.

Just… any second now. A blow to your head, or a knife to your throat. You made a breakthrough in the case, so he doesn’t need you anymore. He’s going to end your life, plant whatever weapon he uses at the Jung’s, and frame them for your murder. An undercover mission gone wrong–they found out about your real identities and killed you. Jeongguk escaped, and he gets the glory of clearing the case and putting the bank robbers and subsequent murderers behind bars. Not to mention the relief of knowing you’ll take the truth to the grave, and the new chief, whoever they are, will be none the wiser.

“Where’s Fenrir? What did you do to him?” you whisper, breathing becoming more difficult by the second as you’re imagining all the ways he could kill you.

Surprisingly, Jeongguk lets go of your hand and stands up, backing a few steps. You chance a glance at him and see that he looks worried–there’s a crease in his forehead and his eyes are wide. 

“I haven’t done anything to him. He’s in the backyard.”

So he’s dead then. You don’t comment on it, instead you shut your eyes as another wave of tears runs down your cheeks. Like before, the rate at which you’re breathing increases, and you feel lightheaded, even as you’re sitting down.

“I’m not going to hurt you, okay?” he mumbles, and the sound of movement has you peeking in fear. “Just… hold on.”

For some reason, he’s backing out of the room, leaving you once again in the limbo of not knowing what he’s planning. The rain beats harshly against the roof, and the sound of thunder makes you jump. You hate storms, nothing good ever happens during them.

You feel yourself going insane, waiting for him, but he’s not gone for long this time. Do you prefer him in the room with you? At least then you know where he is and what he’s doing. It makes you anxious, not knowing. Maybe he’s pouring gasoline over the furniture, waiting to light a match?

Surprisingly, you watch as he returns to round the bed–away from you–and approaches the dresser. He rummages through the top drawer, searching for something, until he finds it and turns around. 

It’s when you see him, rounding the bed again–towards you–with the handcuffs in hand that you scramble back along the wall and into the corner. You remember how he teased you about it, arrogantly offering to tie you up, cuff you to the bed. If he’s planning on resuming what Hoseong started…

Noticing your distress, Jeongguk’s eyes grow wider, and he stops and stands in front of the bed with his hands raised.

“Oh, no, no, they’re not for you,” he explains, looking at you, sitting terrified in the corner. His eyes move from you to the silvery cuffs dangling from his hand and back again. “He cuffed you, didn’t he? Hoseong?”

You’re not sure where he’s going with it, but your guess has evolved. He wants to act sweet and like he cares so that you’ll give in and he can do whatever he wants to punish you, gloating about how he managed to trick you. The dumb feminazi falling for it and thinking he cares for her.

“Look.”

You do, watching anxiously as he opens one side of the handcuffs and locks it around his wrist. The other side, he closes around the metal bed frame, leaving about two yards between you. He sits down and throws the key, which lands at your feet.

“I can’t hurt you.”

You don’t think about the fact that even if the bed probably weighs a ton, Jeongguk could surely pull it with him if he wanted to reach you. No, you don’t know what you’re thinking about, if anything, you’re just so overwhelmed and scared and relieved that you barely have time to reach for the empty, gray plant pot before you’re throwing up. It’s just bile, proof that it’s been a while since you’ve eaten anything. 

Another thing you haven’t done is sleep. And for your poor, terrified, starved, and sleep-deprived body, it’s too much. As carefully as you can when the room is spinning, and someone is speaking in the background, you lie down, your cheek against the cold floor, and you pass out.

You’re still absolutely exhausted when you come to. It takes a while for your eyes to even open, and you can guess what a mess you must look like. Your head is pounding, surely from dehydration, and your entire body aches. At least some parts of you don’t feel that cold anymore–someone has thrown a duvet from the bed over you, covering your body pretty well except for your left foot and your right shoulder. You’re not trembling anymore, not even as your eyes find Jeongguk.

You’re not sure how much time has passed, but he’s still sitting there, across from you with his wrist cuffed to the bed. He’s moved the bedside table away in order to lean his back against the wall. He hasn’t noticed that you’re awake yet–after all, you haven’t moved–and he keeps his eyes on his right hand that he rests atop his knees, his feet flat against the floor. 

You can’t help but think that he looks like he’s waiting patiently for something, maybe the train, worried that it might be late but understanding that there’s no use in pacing. As you observe him tiredly, you notice something very faintly, so faintly you’re not sure if you’re imagining it. It almost looks as if his eyes are puffier than usual, maybe just a tad bit red too. Like how people look when they were crying a long time ago. Now that you think about it, his hair looks a little messier than usual, and he’s unbuttoned a few buttons on his shirt, as well as the sleeves that he’s rolled up a tad.

A chill runs through your body, and slowly, you pull the duvet closer around your body, notifying Jeongguk of your consciousness.

“Are we waiting for your friends?” your voice is so strained, it comes out as a whisper.

He looks at you, smiling the saddest little smile you’ve ever seen on anyone, and he shakes his head. “No, I called Jihyo, and she’s on her way to pick you up. It’ll take her a while to get here but she’s on her way.”

You narrow your tired eyes slightly. He’s lying.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know,” he apologizes gently. “If I had, I wouldn’t…”

It’s the way he looks bothered that almost has you believing him. But you know just how good of an actor he is. He has despised you ever since he arrived at the district, commented on you and your body with disgust. Yet, you’ve seen how he’s capable of holding your hand in his, kissing you gently and like he means it. Only to go back to insulting you. 

“Everyone knows,” you state quietly, calling his bluff.

“I didn’t. And I’d never dream of hurting you, I promise.”

“You hate me more than anyone, Jeongguk.”

It really is true. Jeongguk obviously feels immense loyalty to his friends, and he’d do anything for them. He’s been one of the most vocal ones, letting everyone know just what a terrible, disgusting, worthless person you are.

“And I’ve gotten to know you pretty well since you transferred, especially here. You can say how sorry you are and how you didn’t know all you want, but I know you’re lying. I hurt your friend and now, with the chief retiring, I’m a threat. What would happen if the new chief is a woman and our station’s little secret gets out? Pretty unlikely, but not impossible, right?”

You swallow, blinking away tears. “You can lie all you want but we both know I was never going to make it back home.”

There’s something that looks like pain in his brown eyes as he watches you.

“I don’t hate you. I thought I did because–fuck–I thought the chief was protecting you by not dealing with the problem, not that he was protecting him. Us.”

His frustration turns into something reminding you of guilt when he continues. “You have no idea how sorry I am. And I can promise you, it’s never occurred to me to hurt you. Not physically, at least. I know I’ve been a dick to you–which is obviously coming back to bite me now–and I wanted to make you feel bad for what I thought you did, but I’d never want to injure you. No one has any plans on doing so.”

His words make you chuckle even though it’s not fun in the least. 

“What?” he looks confused.

“Do you think I’m stupid? Not only have I found the trackers you’ve put on my car, but you’ve tampered with the brakes on it three times in the last months. My mechanic keeps bugging me about filing a report, saying I shouldn’t drive any car for my own safety. How do I explain to her that I can’t exactly go to the police?”

Jeongguk only stares at you, and it makes you all the more frustrated.

“Obviously, I can’t say exactly which one of you is doing it, or who it is standing across the street from my home, just watching, late at night sometimes. Or whose breathing it is on the phone calls. Do you remember like three months ago when I made the mistake of getting coffee and stopping by the printer, leaving my mug unsupervised for three minutes? Who was it that put the fucking cyanide in it? You can tell them that it left a bit of suspiciously chunky foam on the surface.”

“Cyanide?”

“Yeah. Had it tested. You can also tell whoever it is that keeps throwing poisoned meat into my yard that I always check it before letting Fenrir out.”

Jeongguk is quiet, looking like someone just turned his world upside down.

“You really meant it when you said you thought I’d poison your food if you let me cook. That’s why you barely sleep too, right? You’re scared I’m going to hurt you. You brought the razor blades and the dog for me, didn’t you? You’re more scared of me than of the suspects.”

“Why on earth do you think I have a trained personal protection Doberman to begin with?”

Jeongguk puts his face in his free hand, “Fuck, I’m so stupid. I had no idea.”

“Yeah,” you agree quietly, closing your eyes for a second. You know Jeongguk is only playing with you because there’s just no chance he’s gone so long being besties with a rapist and attempted murderer without knowing. Partaking in harassment without knowing the reason why? No, no way. But does it matter at the moment? No, probably not.

“Why did you agree to come here?” he asks, sounding almost… helpless? “If you thought it was a setup?”

“Well,” you start, pain spreading through your exhausted body. Your lips pull into a small, sad smile. “I can’t exactly decline anything at work or I won’t have a job to go to. With the kind of letter of recommendation the chief would leave me, no one else would hire me. Besides, we both know I wouldn’t be safe just by quitting.”

The smile fades, and a tear escapes the corner of your eyes, dropping toward the floor. “And frankly… I can’t do it anymore. It’s been two years, and it only escalates. I don’t have the energy to always look over my shoulder, or lock and barricade my doors and windows at night. I can’t afford to have my car fixed every or every other month, and one day, I’ll miss something, or you’ll go after my mother. It’s just a matter of time.”

“So you… came here, convinced that… I was going to kill you?”

Slowly, you move a hand to your face, wiping the tear away. “Yeah. I mean, I always hoped things wouldn’t end up this way. Or that, at least I could defend myself from… prolonged pain. But at the same time, I knew nothing would change. And I… I promised myself that I’d try my best to be brave and not fight it cause it’s going to happen sooner or later, but… well, I’m evidently not very brave. I’m a coward, coming here to die but still fighting it and begging you to spare my life.”

Then again, the last couple of days have made you doubt yourself. If Jeongguk came after you with a knife, could you… hurt him? With Hoseong, it was a no-brainer, and you fought for your life on pure instinct, only making a conscious effort not to shoot him where he wouldn’t survive it. 

But Jeongguk? He hates your guts, finds you disgusting, and is a man like them all. But as you look at him now, you see the way he held baby Doyun’s hand at the barbeque, and you see him playing and cuddling with Fenrir when no one’s looking. You remember the feeling of his hair between your fingers as he rests his head in your lap, and his gentle hands around your waist. You walked into the trap, and you got trapped. You couldn’t hurt him.

“So, I’m essentially your… terminal illness,” he speaks, looking at you sadly. Your eyes widen. “Eunha told me; said she wanted me to take care of my wife. But you’re not sick, are you?”

“No.”

“Fuck,” he shuts his eyes tightly before opening them and looking straight at you with a pained look, “I know you don’t believe me, but I’ve never regretted anything more in my entire life. I thought I was doing the right thing, but instead, I–fuck, I made you apologize? For–”

He hides his face in his free hand again. “I am so sorry.”

It’s hard not to believe him when he looks and sounds so genuine, but you’ve experienced his talent before. Not only that, but he’s a man–he’s not capable of caring for you.

“You said you called Jihyo?” you speak, ignoring his fake apology. 

He removes his hand from his face and nods. “Yeah, she should be here in an hour or so, I think.”

“Okay, say you actually did, why would you? She’d bring unwanted attention and risk unnecessary suspicion. Or maybe you’re just trying to kill two birds with one stone, literally?”

Jeongguk’s face remains soft even as you’re practically insulting him.

“I called her to pick you up because you trust her, and this is no place for you to be right now.”

“But you’re risking the mission. We’ve got a breakthrough but it isn’t all the way through yet, and the bugs still have almost a week’s worth of battery life left. The last thing you want is for them to become suspicious and search for the bugs.”

You don’t know why you’re so intent on letting him know just how thoroughly you see through him. Perhaps you’re simply so used to always having to prove yourself, your capacity and intelligence around men that you can’t let him think you’re nothing more than a dumb girl. You saw through everything, and he needs to know that. 

“You think I give a fuck about the mission when I literally just saw you throw up because you’re so scared of me? I’ve handcuffed myself to the bed, but you’re still shaking in the corner, looking terrified.”

At his words, you realize he’s right. You didn’t even notice the return of the tremors, and they’re not because you’re cold underneath the duvet. Thunder sounds again.

“I promise you,” he starts, looking into your eyes with what looks like a determined sort of kindness, “I’ll do my very best to make things right.”

You wouldn’t have known what to say even if you weren’t interrupted by the sound of a car. Worried but still relieved to finally see Jihyo, you carefully sit up, and then you stand, feeling weak but almost… hopeful. Maybe you’ll get out alive, after all?

But that hope is soon replaced by an ice cold chill running down your spine and filling your stomach as you peer out through the window and onto the cars that have stopped below. It’s not Jihyo. 

You take a step back from the window right as at least two men are exiting the cars, one holding an aluminum baseball bat.

“You… you called… your friends,” you state quietly, feeling dumb for not foreseeing it. He was stalling, and you fell for it. “You’ll be taking turns until I…”

Jeongguk says something, a few rushed sentences, but you’re already exiting the room, not entirely sure why or what your plan is. The sound of his handcuffs rustling against the bed frame sounds as you’re descending the stairs onto the dark bottom floor. 

Should you try to find a way out? Is there one? Jeongguk is stuck upstairs, but you stand no chance against even one man in your current state. Not to mention that you’re unarmed. Where’d Jeongguk’s knife go? Your razor blade? Last you remember, you had it before you passed out. 

You’re so in your thoughts that you don’t hear the footsteps closing in on you from behind. 

“I confronted them, and I guess they’re mad. We’ll go out back, okay?” a familiar voice speaks quietly right above your ear, making you jump. “I promise I’m not going to hurt you, just come with me.”

You turn around, meeting Jeongguk’s eyes. He holds his hand out, no trace of the cuffs. How did he get free?

“I saw them from the window, and there’s four of them. They’re surely armed with more than just the baseball bat, but we might manage to sneak out through the back if we hurry.”

You look at his hand in the darkness.

“Trust me,” he encourages gently, “I’ve got you.”

For some odd reason, you meet his honest-looking but also worried and stressed eyes. And you put your hand in his. It’s warm, and he starts to pull you with him towards the back door.

However, stopping you in your tracks, one of the kitchen windows has been left open, and hushed voices sound through the crack.

“Absolutely no shots, okay? In and out, basically.”

Well, you guess that’s a good thing? You and Jeongguk exchange glances, and he mumbles something about his own gun being in the car. You’re just about to continue when the front door is unlocked. They have a key? Fuck, they must’ve gone to the station in search of the address and key before coming here.

The door glides open, and in steps Hoseong. And then Ryung with Seunghwan in tow. The last person inside is Junseo.

Hoseong stops when he spots you, a smile breaking out on his lips. “Well…”

“Leave,” Jeongguk orders, pulling you behind his body. A thousand thoughts are swirling around in your head, but you’re none the wiser. Any minute now, Jeongguk could start laughing at how you thought he’d protect you. Or, he could be genuine, but what sucks about that scenario is that there’s no way Jeongguk could take them all. Four against one.

“We can’t. Look, I thought we got each other, Jeongguk? Bros before hoes and all that? Correct me if I’m wrong, but it seems like you might be causing us some trouble?”

Peeking from behind Jeongguk, you’re really not a fan of how Hoseong twists the bat in his hand, and your heart is freaking out.

“Technically, you caused the trouble all by yourself,” Jeongguk argues, visibly furious.

Then, before you know it, Hoseong lunges, and Jeongguk pushes you back, out of the way before he’s dodging too. Your heart is in your throat as you watch Hoseong swing at Jeongguk multiple times, Jeongguk dodging all of them before finding an opening and delivering a swift blow to Hosoeng’s head. Behind them, you spot Ryung’s dark eyes locking onto you, and you gulp.

All while Jeongguk somehow manages to grab the bat–which is good considering he’s fighting both Hoseong and Seonghwan–Ryung waits for his opening. Junseo, you don’t even know where he went.

Ryung’s chance comes when Jeongguk aims a powerful kick at Hoseong’s side, sending him flying into the kitchen table and knocking two of the chairs over and Jeongguk to the floor. Hoseong wheezes, like he got the wind knocked out of him.

Ryung decides to take the opportunity, setting off for you, but before he can reach you, he’s intercepted, Jeongguk’s wide shoulders knocking him off his path and into the fridge. While he gets back up, Jeongguk bashes Seunghwan’s head against the countertop once, and he falls down, groaning in pain. Jeongguk is about to follow, but Ryung grabs his shoulders, and manages to get Jeongguk on the ground and climb on top of him. 

You watch as Jeongguk swings the bat, Ryung catching it, but as his hands are preoccupied with it, Jeongguk uses all his strength and connects his fist with Ryung’s face so hard that you hear things crack and see blood spurt. As a result, Ryung falls off and to the floor, lying on his side. 

It’s at that moment you spot Junseo. He’s at Hoseong’s side–Hoseong who’s just gotten up–and is giving him something. Hoseong’s sinister and angry eyes find yours as he accepts the samurai sword.

Then, he’s running. 

It doesn’t take more than a split second for you to decide. You shut your eyes, preparing for the pain and the force that will surely knock you over. The force comes first, but there’s no pain, at least not for a while. It’s like Hoseong is… hugging you?

Surprised, you open your eyes, only to see that the person holding you in their arms is not Hoseong. It’s Jeongguk. Then, you become aware of the pain, a sort of… uncomfortable pin prick to your chest, only bigger? 

You look down between your bodies. There’s a hole in your t-shirt and you’re pretty sure the wetness on your skin is blood. What happened? 

Jeongguk coughs above you, and that’s when you see that the tip of the sword that’s digging into your skin is coming out of his chest. 

Even in your shocked state, you recognize the shape of the item he’s shakily stuffing into your hand. The car key.

“You need to…” he starts, his voice strained. He stumbles, and you see blood coloring his bottom lip. “...Get out of here.”

Suddenly, he groans loudly, and you feel the sword scratch your skin before Jeongguk is sinking to his knees. Behind him, Hoseong is twisting the handle roughly. Then, he lets go, letting Jeongguk’s body fall limply to the floor.

“See what you made me do?” Hoseong hisses at you, stepping over Jeongguk.

He’s caught off guard when you kick him, aiming your foot for the exact spot in which you shot him two years ago. He stumbles, his knee hitting the floor, but then he surprises you by grabbing your foot, and you fall, hitting your head against the floor. You groan in pain, lying flat on your back and seeing Hoseong stand up above you.

But before he can end you, there are gunshots. 

You’re not looking, but you hear Hoseong shout in pain, then a lot of shuffling and two other male voices you can’t quite place. 

All that you’re seeing is Jeongguk. He lies beside you, on his stomach, the long samurai sword he hung on that wall himself sticking out from his back. There’s blood, a lot of it. Some from his mouth and more from his chest and his back. You don’t need to examine him more to know that he’s already dead, that sword went straight through his heart with no chance of missing it, and there’s no surviving that. 

A face comes into view above you, and it takes your pounding head a good second to recognize it. Yoongi.

He meets your teary yet defeated eyes, and you open your mouth. “He’s dead.”

It’s both a question and a quiet statement, the side of your hand touching the side of Jeongguk’s. His eyes are closed, his face blank and void of any life, and you feel empty inside.

Through blurry tears, you see Yoongi look Jeongguk over. Then, gently and with a sad crease between his eyebrows, he nods. Abandoning Jeongguk’s lifeless body, he instead focuses on you. He tries to keep you awake, but something wet and warm pools underneath your own head, and soon enough, you can’t keep your eyes open any longer.

<previous | next>

hey pals... let me know what you think RIP <3

MY HEART 😭 IM SO SOFT 🥺 (cr.)

dextrocardia | 01

Dextrocardia. Originally a medial term, but also a way to describe someone who's got their heart in the right place.

"She's been moved to another operation to help out. This pairing is necessary because you'll be undercover as spouses. I know you two can be professional about this."

"What?!" It's Jeongguk's upset voice that sounds, and for once, you share his displeased opinion.

Spouses.

pairing: cop!jk x f detective!reader

genre: undercover cops, fake marriage, e2l au, angst, fluff, smut

word count: 5.3k

warnings (serious):a ton of sexist (police) men (jk included), there will be different kinds of assault in later parts, more specified warnings will come but probably don't read if you have traumas and feel bad reading about stuff like that

warnings (less serious): jk is hawt. tattooed, strong police man who dislikes wearing shirts, also he's mean :(

rating: NC-17 – Adults Only

masterlist

part 1/? 

© dextrocardia is copyright jeonstudios. this fic can not be modified, re-posted, or translated without my permission.

The station is filled with the familiar scent of coffee and the comforting sound of printers, small talk, and footsteps.

Some mornings, it reminds you more of a typical office than a police station, your own two feet contributing to the sounds as you walk along with the chief, careful to keep your distance from the tall man even when some of the hallways are a tad bit too narrow.

"And since a neighbor just moved out, we've decided that there's an invaluable chance here.”

You hum, feeling the male officers' snarky gazes and eye rolls as you reach the office space where they all sit, their desks organized into landscapes. To say that you’re not very liked in these parts of the station is an understatement.

“What about my current case? The–”

"–It’s on hold for now. We're gonna have to move quickly, so you'll be shipped out in a few days. Move in next door to the Jungs and hopefully solve this thing once and for all. I've already picked out an officer to go with you."

There’s no time for you to ask questions before the chief opens the dark wooden door located at the back of the room and motions for you to enter his personal office first.

You do, but the sight of what’s inside nearly causes you to stop and the chief to bump into you from behind. The sight of who’s inside.

Jeon.

“Are you kidding,” you hear him mutter under his breath, and it’s obviously not because he’s so elated that his detective is you. No, it’s because he despises you.

Disgusted eyes burn holes in the side of your face as you follow the chief's command and sit down next to your colleague from another division.

The tension definitely doesn't go unnoticed, but Jeon Jeongguk isn't an exception; you know that all male officers feel more or less the same way about you. It's the reason that the tension goes unmentioned and why you’d hoped for your usual female detective partner to sit there.

"Where's Jihyo? I assumed we'd work together as usual," you question, ignoring your own annoyance and the immature man next to you, who you know is doing his best to let you know just how much you appall him purely by facial expression. 

"She's been moved to another operation to help out. This pairing is necessary because you'll be undercover as spouses. I know you two can be professional about this."

"What?!" It's Jeongguk's upset voice that sounds, and for once, you share his displeased opinion.

Spouses. Not only has the chief dismissed a really important case that you’ve been trying to get flying for a long time, but you’re supposed to play… spouses? Unfortunately, you know better than to anger the chief more than necessary, so you focus on suffocating the most urgent fire.

"I'm sure that's not needed," you argue calmly, attempting to sound like the more mature one in the room. "One of us could go alone, or I could go with Sana? People are much more accepting of same-sex couples nowadays."

"Of course, you man-hating lesbian."

"Oh, grow up, you fucking child,” you bite in Jeon’s direction before returning your hopeful (and desperate) eyes to the chief. “She and I could be roommates? Cousins?"

"Stop it," the chief warns half a second before you can suggest acquaintances, and it’s easy to see that the slightly above middle-aged man feels like he's talking to two preschoolers. 

"Look, I'm not going to argue about this. We don't send anyone out alone, you know that,” he berates lazily from behind his desk with a pen pointed in your direction.Rumor has it that he’s set to retire in a few months, and you’re sure he’s looking forward to it more than ever at that moment.

“Here’s what’s gonna happen. You two are newly-weds, moving in basically across from the Jungs. It's a bit of a religious neighborhood, but like, weirdly so, so you'll be a housewife and Jeon a lawyer. It allows you to stay home during the days to get to know the neighbors, and Jeon can say he's taken a week or two off to help settle in."

Your jaw clenches as the details keep coming, and you know, without even looking, that even if he’s just as upset as you are, at least your "professions" are amusing to Jeongguk. He’s probably even smirking.

“What about him then?” you question, nodding toward Jeongguk while keeping eye contact with the chief, “He’s got his whole arm covered in tattoos, won’t that be a problem?”

“No, a lot of the suspects have them too, so it doesn’t matter.”

“Oh, so it’s only a trip back in time for women, got it,” you seethe. It can't get any worse than this.

The chief ignores your comment, "Look, this is what we've deemed the most inconspicuous; a young, married, heterosexual couple. You'll blend right in, and being recently married, it'll give you an excuse to seem a little… distant."

You understand perfectly well what he’s implying, but you can't help but question it. "And what does that mean?"

The chief sighs and lowers his head a little, "It means that you two need to put on your happy faces and act like you're madly in love and like keeping your hands off each other is harder than the donuts Officer Kim brings on Tuesdays. That way, sneaking off together and whispering in each other’s ears, as well as a missed neighborhood barbeque or two, might go unnoticed. Or at least seem… well, inconspicuous."

A scoff sounds from beside you. "I don't get why I have to be the one to go with her? Isn't there another detective to do all that pretend lovey-dovey shit with her?"

Apparently, that's the thing that really upsets Jeongguk, and even though you find him self-centered and immature, it still hurts a little to know that even fake being in love with you is unmentionable.

"No. Like I said, I won't argue. Time is of the essence here; I need a man and a woman that can pass as a couple and work together. You're a great officer, and she's a great detective."

"You sure about that? And what about my safety, then? I don't want to "accidentally" get shot because I'm a man and she feels inferior to me!"

Ah, there it is. The reason you're so insanely disliked. A mission ends with a gunshot wound to the thigh of your former detective partner–now officer and Jeon’s best friend–and suddenly everything’s your fault and everyone’s turned against you. It wasn’t your fault, and it’s not like you ever wanted or planned for it to end that way!

For the first time, you turn your head to really look at the man beside you, your glare powered by years of anger and frustration. His face is flushed, revealing just how irritated this whole ordeal is making him.

In another universe, one in which men don't have personalities, you'd for sure want him. There's no denying the attractiveness that oozes from him, but masculinity is both a blessing and a curse.

He's gorgeous, raven hair parted to expose his just as dark eyebrows and his forehead. He’s got cheekbones and a jaw from another world, and it looks like he's wearing the black pants of his uniform but has foregone the shirt in favor of a dark blue sweatshirt with the police academy's print on it. Sleeves rolled up to his elbows, his veiny forearms–one of which tattooed– and hands are on display, and it's hot.

He's hot. Intimidating and hot. 

But he's also so… mean. So spoiled and entitled and just such a man. It’s been less than a year, maybe eight months or so, since he transferred from another district, and during those months, you've never spoken more than a few sentences to each other.

Still, you’ve known of him since before he even put his foot in the building, his reputation preceding him. Unfortunately, he's one of the best officers to grace this part of the country in a long time; his accomplishments piling up like golden trophies.

It's harder to measure for a field officer, still, the dude has an unbelievable rate of cleared and successful cases, surprisingly few complaints made against him, and the fitness competitions held every year among the officers are just another opportunity for him to improve his previous impressive record. He could probably bench five times your bodyweight and kick in whichever steel-reinforced door he wants. Everything turns to gold underneath his skilled fingertips, and it makes it all exponentially worse.

Perhaps he deserves some of the praise, but you still stand by the fact that Jeongguk is spoiled and entitled and just such a man. Almost all the males inside this building are. Pumped full of the worst kind of drug, produced by their own body—testosterone—and you're so fucking tired of it. 

Before you can defend yourself, bite back that he needs to shut the fuck up, you're interrupted.

"She's still not allowed to carry,” the chief clarifies calmly. “You've done mostly field, and she's done investigating. You'll work together, combine your strengths and eliminate your weaknesses. Okay?"

"Fine," you huff, "but I'm bringing my dog."

When you leave the room—Jeongguk exiting behind you only to be greeted by another male officer—you hear it.

“You’ll put her in her place, right, Jeon? Put an end to all of this and show her it’s a man’s world she’s living in?”

“Of course,” he replies just as confidently, “I’ll show her.”

And you know you might as well start writing your will.

Three days later, you’re sulking in the passenger seat of a sleek black car, being driven by none other than Jeon Jeongguk himself. It’s not his personal car, and it for sure doesn’t belong to you; yours is still at the repair shop where it’s been for faulty brakes three times in the last six months. 

You wanted to drive, but apparently, your fake new neighbors are so sexist that you can’t be seen stepping out of a car after driving your “husband” around. Because everyone knows driving is a man’s job, right?

Jeongguk has a big suitcase in the backseat. You have two, one containing clothes and whatever you need for your stay and another that holds food and other dog stuff. In the actual trunk, inside a crate–because you value his safety over everything–your Doberman sits.

You don’t know much about the house except that it’s big and mostly empty. The basic furniture has apparently already been moved there yesterday, but the rest of “your” furniture and possessions are scheduled to arrive within the next few days.

Ideally, you’ll manage to solve the case before the moving trucks pull up, sparing you the work of hauling heavy objects inside when you know it’s just for show and that someone’s gonna want them back eventually. If that happens anyway, you’re already contemplating leaving it to Jeongguk since he wants to be the man so badly. He’s obviously not happy about being partnered with you, but it at least brings him joy to see you have it worse. Except for having to be around you, he’s living the dream, getting to be a lawyer and have a housewife to be serviced by.

Among the chief's instructions is a dress code, and so today, Jeongguk is wearing black slacks and a white, crispy button-up shirt while you’re wearing a dark blue off-the-shoulder sundress. Unsurprisingly, you need to look put-together at all times which makes you hate your new fake neighbors even before meeting them. Well, a few of them are suspected to be some of the most successful bank robbers in the country’s history, but besides that.

The thought makes you huff quietly, and even with your gaze out the windshield, you see from the corner of your eye how Jeongguk glances at you. Probably giving you more of a glare, if you’re being honest.

There hasn’t been much going on conversation-wise either. The arguing of who was to drive happened an hour ago, and after that, you’ve laid a few comments on his choice of roads, and he’s answered them with just as much attitude as you’ve muttered them. You see this adventure ending in one or two ways–you and Jeongguk becoming friends isn’t one of them.

At five p.m., you pull up in front of your new house, and at first glance, it’s lovely. The entire neighborhood is. Big, pristine houses painted in white with green, mowed lawns and backyards, and white Picket fences. Your house is no different.

When the engine’s silenced and the key in Jeongguk’s right palm, you start feeling nervous. But you can’t let him know, so you focus on the task at hand. 

Your hands are a little sweaty, and to lessen the tremors, your fingers play with the diamond on your ring finger. It’s fake, but they’re done so well these days that even a professional would have a hard time differentiating. There’s a ring decorating Jeongguk’s finger too, a gold wedding band that you have to admit really suits his brand. 

Another thing he has with him is a gun, something you’re not allowed. But joke’s on anyone who thinks you’d willingly go unarmed. You have razor blades with you, sometimes a blade lies in your bra, protected in a plastic case. Other times, it’s strapped to your thigh. Like now.

As soon as you open the car door and step out with a fake smile on your face, you head to the trunk to get Fenrir. It’s unnerving how you can see your closest neighbors peeking out through their windows already, and you know instantly what kind of neighborhood this is. The brown Doberman jumps out, wagging his undocked tail and stretching after the drive.

“Since people are watching,” you hear Jeongguk from behind you. When you turn around, you almost lose your breath.

As he’s grabbing your bags to carry them inside, he’s wearing a smile that looks so incredibly genuine you’re almost left speechless. But of course, you can tell by his gritted words that he’d gladly let you carry them yourself if there weren’t witnesses. Actually, if no one was around to see, he’d probably just deck you with one of them.

“Fuck you, I can bring them myself,” you mutter through a sweet smile of your own, head tilted slightly.

“Just go inside before anyone can come here and start interrogating us, we still have things to go through.”

“Fine,” you snap, and together with Fenrir, you walk toward the entrance, unlocking it.

Jeongguk isn’t far behind, dumping your bags by the door that he closes behind him before turning to you.

You’ve gone through a few things regarding your disguise, but a lot of details still need to be agreed on.

Jeongguk is Kim Jaehyun and you’re Kim Yeji, high school sweethearts that married just a few months ago. The honeymoon was set in Paris at Jeongguk’s request, making you roll your eyes at the laziness. Jaehyun is just such a romantic.

But only a few minutes after the door is closed, a gentle but firm knock is placed on it. You exchange somewhat panicked looks with Jeongguk before inhaling and exhaling deeply and reaching for the door.

On the other side, dressed in colorful blouses and flowy skirts and with a plastic container each, two women stand.

“Hi,” you start, trying to channel your shy but polite inner housewife.

“Hello! Welcome to the neighborhood!” one exclaims happily, nudging the other subtly with her elbow.

“Yes, hello! Such a surprise to see new neighbors already! I’m Jung Eunha and this is Min Hyeji, we live just across the street. Or at least I do, Hyeji is your next door neighbor!” she nods toward the other woman.

“Oh, uh, nice to meet you,” you greet, hoping that the discomfort behind your smile isn’t visible. “I’m Kim Yeji, and this is my husband Jaehyun.”

Improvising, you turn around hastily and go to… well, touch him somehow, but he’s closer than you expected and so your hand bumps into his shoulder, and you just… keep it there somewhat awkwardly before slowly dropping it.

“Nice to meet you,” Jeongguk starts, his focus laying beyond you. “Yeah, we’ve been looking for a new home for a while, and when we saw this, we just fell in love immediately. Such potential and with a really nice neighborhood.”

“Yes,” Hyeji smiles proudly, “Perfect for when you get little ones!”

You feel yourself hurling on the inside, disgusted by the thought of having kids with someone as vile as Jeongguk, but he manages to keep his cool even though you assume he’s taken by surprise as well. How can they already know that you don’t have children? Unless they really supervised your entire arrival?

“Yeah, we’re not really there yet, but I agree; it’ll be perfect for our future kids, right, honey?”

He looks down at you. They all look at you.

Honey.

“Oh, yeah, absolutely!” you smile, trying to blink away the image of your archnemesis gazing at you so fondly. You would’ve never guessed it, but when they’re not overflowing with murderous disgust, Jeon Jeongguk has the prettiest brown eyes. Soft, brown eyes.

“Well, it’s so nice to meet you, but we gotta run. Here are some cookies,” Eunha excuses, taking a step closer to push her container in your hands. Hyeji follows, stacking hers on top. “We’ll see you around soon!”

And then, they’re gone, and the door’s closed.

You remain silent for a moment, just to make sure no one’s lingering and hearing stuff they’re not supposed to.

“Dude, what was that?” Jeongguk asks, and when you meet his eyes this time, the softness is gone, traded back for that familiar hatred.

“What?” you question with an irritated whisper, still paranoid the women might stand with their ears pressed against the door.

“I thought you were supposed to be a good actress?! Yet you touched me like I was your new colleague? ‘H-hi, I’m K-kim Y-yeji and th-this is m-my husband J-Jaehyun.’”

“Shut the fuck up,” you grit, walking away to place the containers on the kitchen counter.

“Maybe you don’t understand, I wouldn’t expect you to, but we need them to believe us. Either you touch me like you love me or you don’t touch me at all.”

After a few more digs at each other, you split up. Jeongguk disappears somewhere further into the house while you unpack Fenrir’s bowls, the gifted containers left on the counter. The big dog follows you closely to the kitchen sink, propping his snout in between you and the counter and hoping you’ll fill his bowl with something tasty.

“No food now,” you explain, setting the water-filled bowl down in an appropriate spot in the kitchen. “There you go, you must be thirsty.”

Although surely disappointed, Fenrir sniffs at the bowl before lapping at the water. You take a step back, watching him with a crease of worry between your eyebrows.

This whole arrangement has you incredibly nervous. You’re used to spying on people and such, but it’s usually just... observing. Many times, you’re seated inside a car with binoculars, or you’re tailing someone through the mall. Rarely, you even have to talk to the suspects, and now? You’re living next door to them, trying to get to know them.

You don’t even know what’s worse; living in the house next to your enemy, or living with your enemy. For all you know, Jeongguk might suffocate you in your sleep with a pillow over your face before the armed robbers even get the chance at taking you out.

“You’re the only man I can trust,” you coo, scratching Fenrir behind his ear when he approaches, a few leftover water drops making it onto your dress.

But with a sigh, you accept the fact that you’re stranded in the house for the coming days, and so you might as well follow your partner’s lead and look around.

It’s a nice house, you conclude. Not the very biggest, but still spacious enough. On the ground floor, there’s the kitchen, a dining area, and living room, all equipped with the basic necessities.

The dining area has a large dining table and eight chairs surrounding it, and the living room harbors a huge, gray couch and a very nice wooden coffee table. A wooly blanket hangs over one of the armrests, and a huge tv is mounted on the wall opposite the couch. 

What you don’t necessarily like is the fact that it’s... open. There aren’t really any separating walls except for around the kitchen, which means that if you need to hide from someone, you can’t. Well, maybe you can lock yourself in the bathroom, and hopefully, the bedrooms also have doors with locks.

The stairs creak a little under your feet, and you definitely take notice of it as you climb them to check out what’s upstairs.

To your surprise, the first thing you see is Jeongguk’s back. Confusion sets in as you watch him. He’s looking inside one of the two bedrooms, frozen with his hand on the handle.

You approach carefully, not sure you want to one; be so close to him, and two; know what’s gotten him so... confused? Confounded? Surprised?

Maintaining as much distance as possible, you peek inside. But it’s just a room? You can’t see the entirety of it since you’re not about to squeeze yourself through the doorway with Jeongguk still in it, but it looks… normal? Nice, actually.

There’s a queen-sized bed placed against the cream colored wall, drowned in beige linen bedding with an oak nightstand on each side. On the opposite side, to your left, there are doors leading to a built-in closet, an oak dresser, and a gray, empty plant pot, standing in the corner.

“You... like this one, or…?” you turn your head to glance toward the other door, leading to the other, unexplored, bedroom. 

You don’t want to let him choose before you’ve seen both because you know he’d rather die than give you the better one without a fight, and you’re not about to sleep in a bed covered in rat shit or something.

But before you can even walk toward that other door, Jeongguk opens his mouth.

“Yeah, well I have to, since this is the only room with a bed.”

At his surprisingly casual words, your heart drops. No. That can’t be true. Your steps are quick, and when you glide the door open, you curse to yourself. The room is empty, completely barren.

With your hand still on the handle, you turn your head toward Jeongguk, horrified. “I’m not sleeping with you.”

“And you think I’d wanna fuck that?” he snaps, eyeing your body with disgust. 

You hate him, you really fucking hate him, and you wish his words didn’t mean anything to you, but they do. The dress you’re wearing makes you uncomfortable, it makes you feel vulnerable under his gaze, and you wish you were allowed to wear your own comfortable clothes and not the ones given to you.

It’s beautiful, it really is, but you loathe that it leaves your shoulders, arms, and lower legs exposed. You hate that you’re supposed to be pretty for your ‘husband’ and even other men, and you hate that they always have to look, that they have to judge. Your value as a woman lies in the way you look, you learned that at a young age just like everyone else, and you hate it. You just don’t wanna be perceived.

Despite already being well aware that the number of men willing to date you would be close to zero—if you’d even want to date, that is—you feel like he’s stabbed you right through the heart.

It especially hurts because he’s so goddamn beautiful, so of course, you respond with the usual anger. “I didn’t mean it like that, you fucking idiot, but yeah, the feeling’s mutual.”

Briefly, you see how Jeongguk rolls his eyes before he lets go of the door and steps back. “So what do we do? I’m not sleeping next to you; I heard you carry a knife wherever you go.”

Well, it’s not technically a knife, but he might as well continue believing that. “Yeah, well there are men everywhere I go? And don’t tell me you’re stupid enough to believe I’d come here unarmed?” you question. How many brain cells does he have? One? “And there’s a couch, so I suggest one of us just takes that.”

You glare at each other. He knows, just as well as you do, that no one is going to volunteer. “Fine. We’ll take turns.”

Sleeping on a couch isn’t necessarily the worst thing that could happen, you just don’t want to sleep out in the living room and feel so exposed and vulnerable. But you’re also tired, fighting with Jeongguk has taken so much of your energy already, and by the looks of it—of him—he’s not gonna give in very easily.

You sigh and roll your eyes, “Fine, you can take the first night.”

He smirks victoriously, immediately going downstairs to retrieve his suitcase to unpack his clothes. Since a neighbor could visit literally any second, you need to be able to keep the act up inside the house as well, and so, as soon as Jeongguk is finished unpacking his clothes, you bring yours. And you hate seeing them hang next to his in the closet, just like you hate him.

Just a few hours after your arrival, there are more knocks on your front door. You’re upstairs when you hear it, descending the stairs to see Jeongguk at the door, talking to one of the women from earlier with a small bouquet in his hand. Eunha.

“We’d love it if—oh, hello again!” she greets when you come to stand next to him. “I was just telling your husband about the barbeque we’re throwing on Saturday! You’re more than welcome to join us if you want. Get to know your neighbors and all that,” she smiles excitedly.

“Well, we can’t pass up an opportunity like that,” Jeongguk chuckles, “Right, honey?”

You’ll never get used to it. The way he looks down at you so fondly, with warm brown eyes and a sweet smile. It both melts your heart and sends an ice cold shiver down your spine.

“Yeah, no, of course,” you smile, looking forward as you try to ignore Jeongguk wrapping his arm around your waist.

Meanwhile Eunha just watches the two of you with heart eyes, smiling when you meet her gaze. “We’ll bring meat of some kind, some... chicken? Maybe?”

“Great idea, and some beer,” Jeongguk adds, finally tearing his eyes from the side of your face. You breathe out. He’s just so intimidating, no less when he’s as close as he is, his disguised scrutinizing gaze on your face and his warm hand on your waist.

“Great, see you then!” she nods, taking a few steps back.

“See you, and thanks again for the flowers,” Jeongguk grins before closing the door and thrusting the bouquet in your hands.

“Excuse me?”

“Be of use and trim the stems and put them in water.”

“There are few people ruder than you, Jeon Jeongguk,” you hiss quietly. “Very few people I hate more.”

“It’s not as if you’re very liked, so go ahead,” he scoffs.

Asshole, you think, but still move toward the kitchen with the flowers in hand. They’re actually very pretty, and you turn the bouquet around to admire them. You’re not very familiar with the different sorts of flowers, and the only kind you can identify are daisies. They’re  blended together with other kinds in a variety of colors and sizes. There are light yellow ones, pink ones, and a few tall, blue ones. You especially like those blue ones.

Trim the stems and put them in water, Jeongguk said. You open a drawer in search of some scissors and find a pair that looks like they could get the job done.

Then you start cutting. It’s harder than you thought; the stems are much thicker and the scissors aren’t sharp enough.

What you don’t notice is Jeongguk, standing behind you and peering down over your shoulder.

“Oh my God, step aside,” he exclaims in annoyance, making you jump. Before you know it, he’s grabbed a knife from a drawer and pushed you to the side. “Have you never gotten flowers or what?”

You back away, scissors lowered uselessly. “Shut the fuck up, you idiot.”

“So, you haven’t?” he taunts, “I don’t know why I’m surprised, flowers are for pretty girls after all.”

Lips pressed together in frustration and humiliation, you watch his back as he finishes the job, clearly happy with his remarks.

You hate it so much, how there’s nothing for you to retort with. Jeon Jeongguk is gorgeous, he’s smart, and he’s talented. He learns a new skill in the blink of an eye, and can get anyone to like him. And the worst part is that he’s very aware of it. He knows he’s unmatched, and there’s nothing you can say that would hurt him.

“I hope you get kicked so hard in the balls that they rupture.”

Jeongguk winces slightly at your words, not long before he rummages through another cupboard and produces a glass vase to store the flowers in. “Rough,” he comments, and you roll your eyes.

“By the way, you know that dress looks horrible on you? You don’t have the tits for it.”

You swallow, feeling your heart break further and your confidence that’s already ninety percent anger, crumble. You feel even uglier around him than usual, humiliated to have to be perceived.

More than anything, you wish that you could just rip your clothes out of that closet, stuff them into your suitcase, take Fenrir, and go the fuck home, but you can’t. You know you’re one misstep away from being fired, and you wouldn’t exactly get the best of recommendation letters with as much shit as you’ve accidentally stirred up. Not that it was your fault. Still, no one in your field is going to hire you, so it’s better to stay, even if that means Jeon Jeongguk will be the death of you.

“We need to plan,” you mutter, subconsciously folding your arms over your chest to hide yourself. “The barbeque is in two days.”

Jeongguk carries the vase to the dining table and sets it down in the middle before turning to you. You make sure to maintain enough distance and focus your eyes on his face and not the way he’s leaning back against the table–his weight supported by his arms–or the way his shirt strains over his chest. Ridiculous how he can be so pretty but so vile.

At least you’re relieved that he seemingly turns his professional mode on as he bites his lip, thinking.

“Well, we know the ultimate goal is to—”

“—Get inside the Jungs’ house.”

“Yes,” Jeongguk agrees. “We need to figure out a way to get inside the house so we can bug it. That’s gonna be the best chance, and hopefully, we’ll get some kind of confession. Maybe they’ll even lead us to the money.”

It takes you ten minutes to plan for the next two days. It’s a bit rough, mostly open to let you see what happens and adjust accordingly, but it’s a good start.

In forty-eight hours, give or take, you’ll show up at the Jungs’ house for the barbeque. You have a feeling Jung Eunha isn’t that involved in her husband’s criminal adventures, but she could be sitting on valuable information. If not about the heists or money, then at least on how to get inside their house. 

So, your focus lies on her and the other wives, while Jeongguk will try to get close to the men, and thus, Jung Hoseok, himself.

You pack away the blue dress.

author's note: so that's the first part, please tell me what you thought, i decided not to do tag lists for this series <3<3