Im Amab And I Want To Be A Girl. I Know That For Sure, But I'm Worried That It's For The Wrong Reasons?

im amab and i want to be a girl. i know that for sure, but i'm worried that it's for the wrong reasons? like that i'm not actually trans. the reason i'm worried is because i find women much more aesthetically pleasing than men (not sexually though, i'm ace). basically i'm scared that i want to become a woman because i feel like i can't be attractive as a man. i haven't really heard about other people having feelings like this so i'm pretty confused. and i can't come out until i'm sure i'm valid.

Harper says:Hey there!I’ll start off by saying I can’t make up your mind for you, whether or not you’re trans will always be your decision you’ll make in your own time.That being said I’d look at your first sentence again. “I want to be a girl.” That seems first and foremost pretty clear cut to me! It took me a while to realise that wanting to be a girl was a pretty major part of actually being a girl and being trans, no matter what other qualifications or doubts come after that. Wanting to be a girl is a pretty good reason to be one! That feeling could come under the lens of social dysphoria. It’s certainly something I felt - and still feel. A large part of my frustration with being a “”“man”““ was that I had to wear awful boring clothes, and I still feel every day that I’m just way more attractive as a woman! I have way more fun and freedom in my presentation this way and it just feels good to be a girl to be honest!There’s a million reasons for wanting to be a girl, and a lot of what you’ve said has or still does resonate with me.

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What Am I?

“I feel [thoughts, feelings]. What am I?”

We can’t answer that. The only person who can…is you. However, we are able to suggest terms you may identify with and encourage you at every turn.

genders / more genders / neurogenders / questioning / sexualities / non-binary sexualities / mlm, wlw, nblnb, etc

Here’s a few mod’s answers on what gender feels like for them. This is a free Virtual Gender Identity Support Group you could join! And this link has some resources: I Think I Might Be Trans: 8 Important Notes On Questioning

We also have tags for different genders (such as /tagged/bigender) if you want more info. Go to your browser like Chrome or Safari and type https://transgenderteensurvivalguide.tumblr.com/tagged/insertidenity if you can’t search the blog on your mobile app! If you have any further questions, feel free to ask us!

“I didn’t suspect I am trans until I was [x age], so am I still valid?

Yes! Not everyone realizes they’re trans in childhood, and that’s totally okay. Some people realize as children, some people realize during puberty, some people realize in high school, some people realize as adults, and it’s all valid. Even our mods had different ages of discovery (When did you know you were trans?) and that’s totally normal!

Here are a few basic steps to get you started on your journey:

Daydreaming. Think of the future; maybe you have the perfect occupation, or children, or life partner(s), or all three? Or perhaps you’re supreme dictator of Earth? No matter where you are, what do you look like? A man, a woman, someone in between, both, neither, etc.? The image you have in mind could be indicative of who you feel you are, or who you want to be.

Stating your gender. Look in the mirror. State, “I am a boy/girl/etc.,” or, “I am not [assigned gender].” Does it feel right? Does it feel comfortable? This could be indicative of who you feel you are, or who you want to be! 

Being called your chosen name/pronouns. (Please note that you do not have to change your name or pronouns to be transgender.) Think of a close friend who you trust and feel would support and respect you during this time. Say to them, “I am questioning my gender and I would like you to call me (insert name here) and use (insert pronouns here) for me when other people aren’t around.” A good friend will agree. If it feels right for them to call you your chosen name, that could be an indicator. It will feel weird at first to have your friend call you your chosen name, but you’ll get comfortable with it if it is right. The same goes for your gender pronouns!

These three websites will help you practice pronouns!

http://www.practicewithpronouns.com (TW for some disturbing sentences, they’re modeled after the Welcome to Nightvale podcast)

https://minus18.org.au/pronouns-app/

http://www.pronouns.failedslacker.com/

Experiment. For people or beings who think they may be transmasculine, you could pack with a sock, purchase a chest binder, dress in “masculine” clothing, or talk to masc-identified people or beings! For people or beings who think they may be transfeminine, you can try on makeup, dress in “feminine” clothing, or talk to femme-identified people or beings!

Research. If you don’t know much about being transgender, look here. Look into surgeries and hormones, if this is something that interests you! (Please note that you do not have to get surgery or go on hormones to be transgender.) Check out videos on YouTube, talk to people who are on hormones or have had the surgeries, or check out our trans-masculine resources or our trans-feminine resources

Still confused? Try this.

Good luck!

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Meirl

meirl

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eps2.1k3rnel-pan1c.ksd

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