Mayiplzsleep - Ding Dong

how ice of you

(Starting a new post bc the other was getting a bit long)

8 shows to get to know me!

Tagged by: @tokuvivor and @writebackatya (thanks!!)

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

X Files

Walking Dead (early)

DT17

Firefly

Welcome to Night Vale

Doctor Who

Thrilling Adventure Hour

Go for it @theindistructablemushu @hueberryshortcake @delladucked

Real

I’m not well I have a new jester eating my brain

If you’re my mutual I need you to know your art is the coolest fucking shit ever it slays penis it serves cunt etc etc etc

It isn’t fair

How come u know me better then myself?

Why do u put me into words without even knowing me?

it’s not fair

you're in the habit of denying yourself things.

if someone asked you directly, you would say that you love a little treat. you like iced coffee and getting the cookie. you drink juice out of a fancy cup sometimes, and often do use your candles until they gutter out helplessly.

but you hesitate about buying the 20 dollar hand mixer because, like. you could just use your arms. you weren't raised rich. you don't get to just spend the 20 dollars (remember when that could cover lunch?), at least - you don't spend that without agonizing over it first, trying to figure out the cost-benefits like you are defending yourself in front of a jury. yes, this rice cooker could seriously help you. but you do know how to make stovetop rice and it really isn't that hard. how many pies or brownies would you actually make, in order to make that hand mixer worthwhile?

what's wild is that if the money was for a friend, it would already be spent. you'd fork over 40 without blinking an eye, just to make them happy. the difference is that it's for you, so you need to justify it.

and it sneaks in. you ration yourself without meaning to - you don't finish the pint of ice cream, even though you want to. the next time you go to the store, you say ah, i really shouldn't, and then you walk away. you save little bits of your precious things - just in case. sometimes you even go so far as putting that one thing in your shopping cart. and then just leaving it there, because maybe-one-day, but not right now, there's other stuff going on.

you do self-care, of course. but you don't do it more than like, 3 days in a row. after that it just feels a little bit over-the-edge. like. you can't live in decadence, the economy is so bad right now, kid.

so you don't buy the rice cooker. you can-and-will spend the time over the stove. you can withstand the little sorrows. denial and discipline are practically synonyms. and you're not spoiled.

it's just - it's not always a rice cooker. sometimes it is a person or a job or a hug. sometimes it is asking for help. sometimes it is the summer and your college degree. sometimes it is looking down at scabbed knees and feeling a strange kind of falling, like you can't even recognize the girl you used to be. sometimes it is your handprint looking unsteady.

sometimes it is tuesday, and you didn't get fired, and you want to celebrate. but what is it you like, even? you search around your little heart and come up empty. you're so used to denying that all your desires draw a blank.

oh fuck. see, this is the perfect opportunity. if you had a mixer, you'd make a cake.

same 🫡

I think even if my hyperfixation for gravity falls faded, my interest in ford and fiddleford in particular will just be with me forever

yknow its a hard line to dance, but i do love when people make the stans a bit mean at times in fics/art (hard line to dance, because its pretty easy to stray into ‘sounds like author just hates these two’ territory unfortunately)

it seems to me that ford has trouble with communication. he often cant tell when something he says could be hurtful to someone

(i say that because you can tell he really does care about his family and he does to try to make things up to them- ie, comforting dipper after the bill thing, praising mabel and letting her write an entry in the journal after the unicorn thing, actually trying to find ways to mend his relationship with stan in spite of everything)

stan is the type of guy to scare children and laugh about it. there is an entire episode dedicated to this. he nonchalantly insults people, hes unapologetically cocky, and, maybe most interestingly, he also seems to have trouble telling when something he said might have been hurtful

hes kinder towards his family/friends (note: kinder, he is definitely still mean to them at times. see: boss mabel, the bottomless pit, etc.) but he really just does not care at all about upsetting strangers. he delights in making people angry, at least, the facade he puts on does. and of course, this isnt an insult towards him, it…actually kinda makes sense when you think about his past. not that it made him that way necessarily, more that it sort of emphasized those traits i think

in a similar vein, i think at least part of the reason ford has difficulty interacting with people could be because of his time spent in the multiverse. it seems he doesnt really like having to interact with strangers (excluding most anomalies). in fact, the only time you see him doing that (that i can recall) is when hes talking to the government agents. otherwise he just sort of…doesnt acknowledge their existence at all. the only exceptions are the members of the zodiac, and he gets time beforehand to know most of them

anyway- when you take those two people and put them on a boat together, you get a really interesting (platonic) dynamic! these two guys who are aggressively protective over each other and who will both absolutely deck a stranger in the face

imagine a scenario where stans insulting some random stranger and the person throws an insult back just to get knocked out by ford whos absolutely not going to tolerate it (except from stan, who gets the equivalent of a slap on the wrist)

or imagine a scenario where someone notices fords extra fingers and theyre overreacting about them and it gets to be stans turn to fistfight someone

its fun to think about, but hard to pull off. oftentimes you get ‘ford is definitely egocentric and thats it’ instead of ‘ford struggles with communication/general human interaction and especially hates interaction with people he doesnt know’

oftentimes instead of ‘stan is unapologetically mean to a lot of people (and theres a good possibility that being homeless and having to live with filbrick emphasized this)’ you get ‘stan can be mean but hes not as bad as ford and also it doesnt actually count as being mean if its directed at ford’

and, of course, this isnt to say you have to change the way you write them, this is simply me saying i like seeing these two parts of them interacting with each other. and it ended up much longer than intended

if youre like me and youre afraid of depicting them as mean in any way because other people scare you, you dont have to write them that way! you should write your fics for you first and foremost and if you dont want to write them that way, you are in no way obligated to!

anyway- theres a lot more i could say about this subject, but i think this is long enough

(just a small bonus bit to say that living with filbrick + all the bullying he had to go through definitely affected ford just as much as stan. and that neither of their traumas are more important than the other)

Maybe some Ford and Mabel bonding?

using this opportunity to push my ford-should-have-a-prosthetic-arm agenda