II17 SPOILERS !!!!!!!

screenshot doodle redraw of mepad being sassy

Another 5 minutes of this little nerdy nerd being cute and precious 💚

good things will happen 🧿

things that are meant to be will fall into place 🧿

EYE phone AU: 'EYE' miss your face *insert knee slap here* (disclaimer: I like Toilet but Mephone is an unreliable narrator so he'll be called mean names sorry)

Mephone waited patiently for the contestants by Mepad, standing nervously behind them. It was slightly humiliating, but it was better than the contestants knowing about the situation.

" MISTAH PHONNNNNEEEEEEEE" the annoying voice of Toilet screamed loudly right next to the two electronics. Mephone groaned internally.

"MISTA PHONEE, OH YOU'VE NEW GONE SO LONG WHERE-" "Not no- not now, Toilet. Get me so- some wires ASAP." Toilet stopped, it was obvious he wanted to ask more questions, but instead the toilet for once acted wise and called out that he wouldn't let Mephone down and most likely ran off considering the brief silence.

He could hear distant voices, and knew it had to be his contestants, and they sounded like they were getting closer. Mephone braced himself as the voices were now close enough to be understood.

"Mephone! Where have you been? You disappeared after telling us we were in danger! What's the danger? Can we stop it? Are you back because you stopped it? And why are you hiding behind Mepad???"

" I... "

What.

The contestants were in danger? That was terrible! Think of the lawsuits! ('Think of the contestants wellbeing.')

And he was gone for a couple days? Why? What was he doing?

Why couldn't he remember anything anymore? What was going on anymore??? How did he get the crack??? Where had he gone???

Mephone started speaking to the contestants, trying his best to stay calm.

"Everything is - every - ever - fine and my assistant Mepad here will be here to tell you how everything is - Assistant -fine and there is no need to wo- worr- worry, right Mepad? Everything's - mepad - normal! " Was his crack really causing this glitching stutter? Really? Now, when he was trying to act normal?

For a long moment Mepad stayed silent, and for a long moment Mephone was almost about they wouldn't go along with the lie. then Mepad spoke up again, "I can confirm everything is alright. I will tell you how everything has stayed exactly the same right now"

And Mephone took that as time to leave. His plan was flawless, as long as Mepad distracted everyone he would be able to run far enough away to stop needing to hide. He couldn't see anything wrong with this plan.

And as he started running he realized he couldn't see at all.

And fell face first.

Then he remembered Toilet would be coming back.

'Darn it.'

"MISTA PHONEEEEEEEEEEE YOUR SCREEEEN!!!!!" Toilet wailed louder than ever before when Mephone pushed himself up, and Mephone flinched and thought his screen might crack more until Toilet stopped. The other objects must have heard the screeching, it was impossible not to when it reached the level of Mic's volume

"no, no, - fine fi- I'm- no, I'm fine,. My screen is - no, no, I- is fine!" Mephone covered his eyes and the crack as best he could and spoke as fast as he could with the glitching. He could hear the contestants getting closer, and it was too late to run.

"Mephone? What ar- Woah, what happened to your screen?!?" Asked an object, who Mephone was going to guess was... Paintbrush? Probably? It didn't matter.

"Nothing hap- happe- who- happened to my screen, I feel perfectly --happened to my sc-- fine." Mephone said, he knew the contestants were there but the silence reminded him of when he was running around frantically looking for Mepad. It made him feel lost, and unsure of himself.

"Hey, if he's broken, maybe Testube can fix him? She's a scientist, she could probably find a way to fix him!" An object who was probably suitcase said. It was a good idea, so why did Mephone hate it? The logic checked out, yet Mephone felt dread at the idea, despite the fact it would benefit him greatly.

"Alright," the voice of Testtube spoke, sounding much closer than the others, " Mephone, could you remove your hands from your screen? " Mephone didn't move and after a bit, somebody gently held both his hands, carefully moving them away from his eyes.

"Hey- wait a minute-" He tried to protest but froze at the gasps from his contestants. He could hear somebody (probably fan) say ''Fascinating!'' And he scowled.

"Hm, " the scientific object exclaimed, " the crack goes through the middle of both your eyes which seems to have not only changed their color, but also split them through the middle. Seeing as your eyes aren't really focusing on anything I am going to assume this is effecting your vision, is your eyesight more blurry than you remember? Having trouble seeing from far away, maybe?"

Mephone sat there, and considered lying. He made up his mind, actually, he would lie about it. Why should he tell them, anyways?

"I- I can't- don't ask m- can't see... Don't as- can't se- ask me how- I can't reme- rememb - remem - remember... " He closed his eyes so that nobody would see them anymore... Why did he tell them? He knew this was a bad idea, he should never have let them question him, he was the host, he made the rules-

And then he felt somebody press into his screen, though it was cautious and and almost even gentle it reminded-

It reminded him of...

No...

NO,

NO-

NO, WAIT-

-----

'WAIT, DON'T -'

A HAND PRESSED AGAINST HIS SCREEN-

'STOP, STOP PLEASE-'

IT BURNED IT BURNED IT HURT TOO MUCH STOP-

IT MOVED ACROSS HIS EYES HE COULDN'T SEE AND IT HURT-

------

And then the burning became a mere ache as if it was only his imagination. he almost felt numb, he could hear objects panicking, but it was too distant to make out.

He honestly didn't care enough to listen, he blacked out, wondering what he had just been thinking about. Must've been interesting.

--- End.

Part 2 complete.

Moving on to part 3 when I can thanks for readin!!!

• Xolbor.

guuuuhh huu. he

I want the two brits to meet soooo bad they would haaaate each other

II17 SPOILERS !!!!!!!

-----------------

"..You're a better assistant than me, Toilet."

"Oh.. Mepad. It was never a competition, you taught me that!"

THEY'RE SO FUCKING DOOMED, THEY WERE DOOMED FROM THE START

So uh, no cover for this yet, but I wrote this an age ago and figured now was a good time to post it.

Bindle

Fandom: Inanimate Insanity Rating: K Genre: Angst Characters: Toilet (plus references to other characters like MePhone and MePad) Fic Description: Mister Phone had told him to leave, so it was time to go. Beta Readers: @jaywings and @mephoj Notes: I know the subtitles spell it "Mistah Phone," but since he's being referred to just in prose here and not in dialogue (with Toilet's accent), it's just "Mister Phone."

---~~~---

He didn't much remember what he'd packed.

Everything had happened so fast, and he could hardly think past the burning and dizziness in his tank as he hopped away to gather what little he had. The only thing to bring him out of his haze was the sudden spike of frustration at how hard it was to tie a knot without hands, especially when he wasn't focused.

Toilet found himself biting down on one corner of the red handkerchief, trying to tug at the knot with his invisible grip. It wasn't a very good knot and Mister Phone wouldn't have been terribly happy with that kind of shoddy work but he managed to secure it to the stick he'd apparently found. The bindle was not a big one, but he slung it behind his tank nonetheless.

Mister Phone had told him to leave, so it was time to go.

While his earlier actions had been performed in a furious, tear-blurred haze, he hopped through the contestant grounds with a great deal more slowness, thumping against the soft grass and feeling heavier with each step. After a moment he paused, turning around to take in the view.

By now, the area was cast in soft moonlight, and it was hard to see everything from where Toilet stood at the edge of the grounds. If any contestants were still out and about—probably celebrating their immunity and the fact that they got to spend more time with Mister Phone—he couldn't see them from here. Maybe a speck of light in the distance indicating Hotel OJ, but that was it. He didn't even get to have one last look at the people he'd been working with for the past several months.

It struck him that he didn't even get to say goodbye.

Something gave a terrible yank in his plumbing, and he jumped up into a frantic hover.

"GOODBYE EVERYBODYYYY!" he called out into the night. His voice echoed briefly, and he landed on the ground, waiting a moment. When nothing happened, he jumped into a slightly lower hover, shakily adding: "I-I love you...!"

Again he landed, waiting a moment longer for a response. Maybe someone rushing out to ask him what was going on, or where he was going. Or someone calling "goodbye" back. He'd even take Mister Phone telling him to shut up.

Nothing.

He was leaving this place for good, and no one cared.

Something tugged in his plumbing again, and he spun back around, hurrying away as his vision blurred with tears.

But no, no, maybe they didn't know yet, he argued to himself as he charged past the edges of the contestant grounds. Maybe they hadn't noticed—the last challenge hadn't ended that long ago. It had to be that, right? Maybe later they'd be looking around for him and saying "Hey, where did Toilet run off to?" They would miss him, Mister Phone would miss him, they had to, they had to, they—

His porcelain struck a rock he'd failed to notice, and he tumbled forward, splashing water on the ground and inadvertently slinging his bindle ahead of him. It clattered down softly in the grass, the handkerchief coming untied, spilling some of its contents.

"Ah!" he cried, hurrying up to the pile of items. While some were still covered by the handkerchief, several colorful cards had been scattered across the grass.

Toilet rushed to gather them up, but took a moment to stare at each one as he picked it up. The first was a cat drawn in marker and glitter on a blue card, while the next was... Microphone? He'd drawn her shouting with a bunch of sound waves coming out around her. Next was Baseball and Nickel—he'd drawn them on the same card since they seemed to like to hang out—and then there was Balloon, and Fan and that funny egg, and some more cats, and Marshmallow, and Mister Phone, and...

...Oh, right. These had been for him.

He'd nearly forgotten, after everything that had happened. He'd drawn these the other day when he'd found Mister Phone unconscious by the painting of the corn man. He'd had that weird message on his screen—something about memory—so Toilet had decided to try drawing a bunch of "memory cards" to help him jog that memory. He'd drawn all the contestants, even the eliminated ones, so Mister Phone would remember the game show and be able to get back to it. But then MePad had come along and—

Toilet paused.

On the last card, he’d drawn MePad next to Toilet himself.

I do not intend on being superior to you at all. I consider us equals. We both serve a different purpose, is all.

He stared down at the drawing, at MePad's screen colored in purple ink and shimmering glitter.

The last time he'd seen that screen, he'd been staring into it imploringly, waiting for MePad to back him up, to support him as he always had. Mister Phone was upset and not acting very rationally, but MePad could talk Mister Phone down and convince him that he didn't need to fire Toilet.

But when MePad had met Toilet's gaze, he'd only looked away.

"Equals…?" Toilet muttered, glaring down at the drawing. "Good to know that was a bunch of hogwash!" He punctuated the last word with a splash of water, soaking the card and causing the ink to run, the glitter to wash away. For a moment he felt a twinge of regret, but only for a moment, and he turned back to the fallen bindle with a huff.

As he moved part of the handkerchief aside to put the stack of cards back in, he wound up uncovering the rest of its contents: a bundle of wires in a rainbow of colors.

Oh.

That’s right… Mister Phone had asked for them so often, he'd finally gone out one day to gather a variety of them to have ready. He hadn't really asked for them since, but Toilet had hung onto them, just in case.

Maybe Mister Phone would need them again—need him again—and call him back.

Shaking himself, Toilet quickly gathered his possessions again and tied the bindle back together, making sure the knot was extra-tight this time. Slinging it behind his tank, he continued his journey, noticing the grass beneath him slowly transition into sand. Up ahead, water lapped against the otherwise-silent beach.

It struck him that he had no idea where to go from here. He'd been working here for so long, ever since Master Adam had hired him to—

...Wait, that was it!

Mister Phone had only gotten so angry after he'd mentioned Master Adam. It had to be something to do with him, right? If Mister Phone was angry at Master Adam, then Master Adam must've done something awful!

Where was Master Adam, though? Toilet had never met him in person—they'd only ever spoken over the phone. But Mister Phone had also mentioned the corn man, so maybe Master Adam was working for him? Funny he'd never seen him when they visited the Cloud, though. If he'd known, he would've stopped at his office to say hello.

Well... maybe he could give his office a visit, then, but not for a friendly chat.

Toilet strode across the sandy beach, a goal finally set in mind.

He was going to get to the bottom of this, and figure out what was bothering Mister Phone once and for all.

And… and then maybe Mister Phone would want him back.

…Maybe?

…please?

Your favourite objects stand with Palestine!