Carmen Berzatto Recs

You’ll Always Be My Hero - Chapter 16 ; Abomination

Author: @stilinskiparker​ Characters: Stiles Stilinski x Emma Thomas (OC) Word Count: 5,941 Warnings: mentions of a dead body, more confessions, A/N: Hi, friends! Chapter 16 is here, and we’re finally being introduced to the Kanima. We’ve changed the uploading schedule for this series, so if you’re not familiar with it, please click here. If you like this chapter, please do not hesitate to reblog and give some feedback, whether it be in the reblogs, comments, or my inbox. As always, read at your own risk and enjoy 😊

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season masterlist

series masterlist

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Singledad!h and babysitter!reader

F: Fluff | S: smut | A: angst

Harry is a singledad and a nurse. Y/n is a postgraduate student, who fits perfectly the spot for Estela's babysitter.

Blurbs

Tender (F)

Harry calls Y/n to help him with Estela and she ends up staying at the Styles house for the night.

Concepts

Estela gets hurt at the playground

Estela learns that some rules aren't up to negotiation

Estela facetiming Y/n and Harry when she's at her mom's

Y/n and Harry enjoying some time alone (a bit smutish)

Christmas morning

Estela wants to cuddle with y/n but she's not home

Estela has a bad day and misses her dad

Estela sneaks out of her crib

Estela sneaking in Harry and Y/n's bed

Grocery shopping

Estela misses Y/n: #1 and #2

Y/n spoiling Estela: #1 and #2

Day at the autumn fair: #1 and #2

Afternoon at a park together #1 and #2

Instagram concept

A/n: we will only be doing concepts at the moment because I'm having a hard time writing.

The way they met, Estela's first night with Y/n, Y/n bringing Estela to the hospital because she gets sick and how they fell in love will be written as blurbs in the future

Best series Ive read in a while ❤️❤️❤️

You (Part 13)

Summary: After Tom breaks the longest relationship he’s ever had, both of them seem to handle the breakup in a completely different way.

Words: 6k (uncorrected)

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watermelonsugacry's masterlist

Harry Styles

YN and Harry have known each other since 2010 when they were put in a band together called One Direction. Since the band split up, YN and Harry have kept in close contact, may or may not have grown deeper feelings for one another and have continued to help each other create music. This is their story.

Sectioned in timeline order

YN’s Albums & Series Playlist)

YN’s Guitars

1dbandmember!yn's Eras

YN’s Hair Evolution

YN’s Tattoos

YN’s Instagram Overview

It's A New Life

YN is over the moon when she hears that her childhood best friend was able to get an audition to compete on the X-Factor. But what happens when she learns about a surprise and a curly headed lad that can change her life? (5.2k)

Take A Chance

As the judges deliberate who to bring back, Nicole doesn't hold back from wanting to add another member. (1.3k)

Red Bikini

YN and the boys speak up about what their management wants her to wear for the WMYB music video.

Stereo Hearts

Insight to how the solo covers went for the Up All Night tour.

Help From An Older Brother

Louis has been rooting for YN and Harry to get together since day 1.

Wonderful Christmastime

YN and Harry during Christmas time over the years.

iGo One Direction

Scenes from when the band did the infamous iCarly episode.

Subtle Actions

Things YN and Harry did that made people belive they were secretly dating while still in the band.

Helping Hands

The rest of the 1d boys help Harry and YN get away with a lot of stuff.

YN's Featurette

Snippets of YN moments in This Is Us.

Nonstop

The band’s exhausted at the airport and when they all decide to take a nap, YN uses Harry as a human pillow.

It's Not That Simple

YN and Harry being oblivious idiots and lie to their mums on the set of filming their new music video, Story of My Life (2.3k)

Publicist

YN’s character in the Best Song Ever music video.

Contagious

YN takes care of Harry when he has the stomach flu.

Jealousy Jealousy

A few moments where YN and Harry were jealous of one another and fans noticed.

LM Discography

Songs YN helped write and produce for Little Mix over the years.

Try That

A little friendly competition between YN and Zayn.

Beanie

YN surely isn't jealous of Harry dating Taylor Swift.

English Love Affair

YN’s PR stunt with the drummer of 5SOS.

MOVE

The story of how YN and her boyfriend (and future fiancé) met.

Mirroring

Mirroring moment between Harry and YN over the years.

Stockholm Syndrome

The origin story of the song and its growth since then (3.1k)

A Race To The Brits

One of the times Harry realizes he's falling for YN is at the 2014 Brits Awards (1.9k)

Little Sister

Times where the boys were protective over YN on stage.

Secret Songs

Some love songs YN secretly wrote and sold over the years.

Movies

YN’s date in the Night Changes music video.

Graceful

Times when YN fell on stage.

Sentimental

YN comforts Harry after they perform at Wembly Stadium.

White T-Shirt

Harry gives his sweater to YN after a water fight on stage.

Huddle

YN may have overreacted to her bandmates' helping intentions.

Beauty

Bits of YN in the Steal My Girl music video.

Distracted

A peak into Harry and YN’s stage interactions.

Heels

YN has an injury but that doesn't hold her back from being on stage.

I Have Never

The band plays a game of never have I ever on the Ellen Show.

Annoying

"YN being done with the rest of the boys for 8 min straight"

Carpool Karaoke

Highlights from the band driving around with James for the Late Late Show segment.

Dodgeball

Highlights of YN on the Late Late Show dodgeball game video.

Tattoo Roulette

One Direction participate in one of the craziest games ever played on the Late Late Show.

Save Your Tears

When YN met Abel and Harry isn't too happy about their friendship.

Jamaica (ongoing series)

After almost a year into One Direction's hiatus, Harry craves being in the studio again to make some music. After inviting his best friend and former band member, YN, onto his team, they spend the next two months in Jamaica as they make an album, uncover hidden feelings, and explore uncharted territories.

Written like Behind the Album

Spill Your Guts (mini mini blurb) pt.2

YN would rather eat the nasty food.

Kiddos

YN’s relationship with the 1d kids

Writing Fine Line (ongoing series)

After having helped Harry with HS1, he has invited YN back again to Malibu to help make Fine Line.

Written like Behind the Album

A Feisty Little Thing

The time when YN had an interview with Howard Stern and was not having any of it.

Pronunciation

Moments with YN’s thick accent.

Casual

What YN is like on Instagram Live.

Bardcore

YN reacts to the medieval version of Watermelon Sugar.

My DMs!

A video YN posted of her and Harry singing Juice by Lizzo.

Side to Side

A tiktok YN did during quarantine showing how she practices in her tour heels.

Building Harry's House (ongoing series)

With the world knowing of their once secret relationship, Harry and YN navigate life together as an official couple and everything that comes with it.

Written like Behind the Album

Secret's Out

The 1d boys reaction to finding out YN and Harry are a couple.

TPWK

The making of the music video with YN.

Bus Ride

YN's cameo in Don't Worry Darling.

Donuts

YN surprises Harry while he's filming Don't Worry Darling. (3.2k)

The Grammys 2021

Harry’s first Grammys with his girlfriend 1dbandmember!yn. Both nominated and both winners. (3.5k)

HARRYCHELLA N.1

It's Harry’s first night performing for Coachella and he doesn't tell YN who his surprise guests are. (3.1k)

HARRYCHELLA N.2

It's Harry’s second night performing for Coachella and he finally reveals to YN who his surprise guest is. (2.5k)

Zane Lowe Interview

Interview bit where 1dbandmember!reader is mentioned.

Superior Guitarist

Harry's asked in a interview who's the better guitarist: Mitch or YN?

Liam’s Podcast

YN’s reaction to Liam’s unsavory comments about her.

Paps

How YN deals with rude paparazzi.

Family

There's a familiar face in the crowd of Harry's Love On Tour show in Dublin. (1.8k)

Amsterdam

Harry does what a fan's sign says.

It's A Classic

Harry and YN receive a nostalgic 1d shirt from fans.

Tits

YN distracts Harry while he's taking an ice bath with talking about a certain body part of his.

34+35

YN changes a certain word when performing on stage.

Medicine

Who is YN to deny her fans' demands to cover one of Harry’s unreleased songs?

Venice Film Festival

YN is Harry's date to the Don't Worry Darling premiere. (3k)

Or Is It?

YN says one of Harry's iconic phrases during her show.

Wasted Time

A morning with a love sick YN and Harry.

Cake

YN wants to take a bite out of Harry's bum.

YN LN: Same Interview, The Sixth Year | Vanity Fair

YN’s growth since she became a solo artist.

Summer Nights

Harry brings out his Sandy to sing with him for HARRYWEEN 2022.

Forevermore

After 12 years of knowing each other, YN and Harry finally tie the knot on their anniversary on England.

My shy little boy masterpost!

A copilation of every single blurb about Artemis and Harry! More blurbs are coming but i you wanna request something, go ahead!

You can find the rest of my masterlist here 

❥ My shy little boy.

y/n’s son is too shy to play with other kids at anne’s house.

❥ The first meeting.

y/n and artemis met a handsome (to y/n) and intimidating (to artemis) man.

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all i ever knew, only you

𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆: 𝗮𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗺𝗲𝗻 𝗿𝗶𝘀𝗲 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗹𝗱 𝗼𝗳 𝗮𝗱𝘂𝗹𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗼𝗱. 𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗺𝘆 𝗯𝗲𝗴𝗶𝗻𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗴𝗿𝗼𝘄 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗹𝗱𝗵𝗼𝗼𝗱 𝗳𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗱𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗽 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝗱 𝗼𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗺𝗲𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗹𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂.

𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: 𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗺𝗲𝗻 𝗯𝗲𝗿𝘇𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗼 𝘅 𝗷𝗼𝘂𝗿𝗻𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁!𝗳𝗲𝗺 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴(𝘀): 𝗮𝗻𝗴𝘀𝘁 | 𝗳𝗹𝘂𝗳𝗳 | 𝘀𝘂𝗯𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗮𝗯𝘂𝘀𝗲 | 𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝘀𝘂𝗶𝗰𝗶𝗱𝗲 | 𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗴𝘂𝗮𝗴𝗲 | 𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗺𝘆 𝗯𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗲𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗽𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 | 𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗶𝗹𝗹𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀 | 𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗹 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗹𝘁𝗵 | 𝗱𝗿𝘂𝗴 𝗮𝗯𝘂𝘀𝗲 | 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗺𝘂𝗻𝗶𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 | 𝗽𝗶𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴 | 𝘀𝗲𝗺𝗶-𝘂𝗻𝗿𝗲𝗾𝘂𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 | 𝘀𝘂𝗯𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗮𝗯𝘂𝘀𝗲 | 𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗿𝗱𝗼𝘀𝗲 | 𝘂𝗻𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗺 | 𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝗱𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗿𝘂𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗶𝗼𝗿 | 𝘀𝗰𝗮𝗿𝘀 | 𝗿𝗲𝗵𝗮𝗯 | 𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆 | 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵𝘁𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝗿𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗽𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 | 𝗴𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗳 | 𝘂𝗻𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗹𝘁𝗵𝘆 𝗰𝗼𝗽𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗺𝗲𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗶𝘀𝗺𝘀 | 𝘀𝗺𝘂𝘁 |

wc: 𝟭𝟰𝟭𝗸

comprehensive timeline

blank/ageless blogs will be blocked

REALIZED EXTREMELY LATE THAT THIS READS MORE AS AN OC BUT PLEASE FEEL FREE TO CONTINUE INSERTING YOURSELF

aiekoy playlist

𝗼𝗻𝗲 | 𝗮 𝗯𝗲𝗿𝘇𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗼 𝗳𝗮𝗺𝗶𝗹𝘆 𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗿𝘀𝘁𝗺𝗮𝘀

𝘁𝘄𝗼 | 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗲𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝗲𝘅𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴

𝘁𝗵𝗿𝗲𝗲 | 𝗹𝗮𝘃𝗲𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿 𝘃𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗹𝗹𝗮

𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗹𝘂𝗱𝗲 𝘇𝗲𝗿𝗼 | 𝗱𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗺𝘆

𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗹𝘂𝗱𝗲 𝗼𝗻𝗲 | 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗹𝗲-𝗺𝗼𝗶

𝗳𝗼𝘂𝗿 | 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝘂𝗿𝗱𝗲𝗻 𝗻𝗮𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗶𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗿𝘇𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗼

𝗳𝗶𝘃𝗲 | 𝘄𝗲 𝗸𝗲𝗲𝗽 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗶𝗻 𝗮 𝗽𝗵𝗼𝘁𝗼𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗽𝗵

𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗹𝘂𝗱𝗲 𝘁𝘄𝗼 | 𝗮𝗻𝘆𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗼 𝗵𝗮𝗱 𝗮 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝟭𝟴 +

𝘀𝗶𝘅 | 𝗱𝗶𝗱𝗻’𝘁 𝗶 𝗱𝗼 𝗶𝘁 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘆𝗼𝘂?

𝘀𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻 | 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝗶 𝗯𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗱 𝗶𝗻 𝘂𝘀 𝗹𝗮𝘀𝘁 𝘄𝗲𝗲𝗸

𝗲𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 | 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗲𝗲 𝗮 𝗳𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗱, 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗲𝗲 𝗮 𝗴𝗵𝗼𝘀𝘁

𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗲 | 𝗱𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝘀𝗮𝘆 𝗯𝗮𝗯𝘆! [𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝗼𝗻𝗲] [𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝘁𝘄𝗼]

𝘁𝗲𝗻 | 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗵𝗼𝘄, 𝗶 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲

𝗲𝗹𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻 | 𝗳𝗹𝗼𝘄𝗲𝗿𝘀 𝗳𝗶𝗹𝗹𝗲𝗱 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗱𝗲𝘄

𝘁𝘄𝗲𝗹𝘃𝗲 | 𝗮 𝘀𝗹𝗼𝘄 𝗯𝘂𝗿𝗻 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗺𝗲

𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗿𝘁𝗲𝗲𝗻 | 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗶𝗻𝗷𝘂𝗿𝘆 𝗼𝗳 𝗳𝗶𝗻𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘆𝗼𝘂

𝗳𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘁𝗲𝗲𝗻 | 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗶𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘁𝗼𝗼 𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗱

Chapter 1

Series Summary: There are moments in our lives that have a major impact. The interactions, the adventures, and the love, all make up who we are. But when Harry can't remember those moments with YN, they are both left wondering what that means for themselves and their relationship.

Chapter Summary: This is the start of their story. Well, the start of the switch in their story, if you will. And if sympathy is in your soul, you'll want to pull it out because they will need it from the get go.

~~~~~

Chapter Warnings: Car accident, hospitalization, memory loss, medications, and a lot of angst

~~~~~

It's a surreal experience, to say the least. Everything happens in slow motion, but too quickly at the same time.

It was supposed to be a simple date night for you and Harry. Your plans involved having dinner at Tasty Palace, your favorite Chinese restaurant, and seeing a movie. You hadn't even bought a ticket, because the two of you wanted it to be a 'spur of the moment' decision- a fun way to make it interesting.

Your plans did not include a drunk driver, or an ambulance ride. Your plans did not include pacing outside of a room with your boyfriend on a hospital bed, waiting as he lies still and quiet, wishing with everything you have that he would wake up.

So you stand out there, staring at your phone, hoping that you were able to form some sort of sentence during your call with his mother, Anne.

As your eyes turn back towards the door, your vision becomes blurry and your mind becomes fuzzy. You feel your body start to get weak and barely hear someone calling for help.

•••

A soft voice brings you back to normal, and you blink your eyes open to see Anne kneeling in front of you.

"Oh thank goodness. YN, are you alright?" She asks, her eyes pointed at you without any sign of moving.

"I think so. Did I faint or something?"

"Yes. I arrived right as the nurse grabbed you to keep you from falling."

Your mind clicks into gear and your body sits up straight as can be, and your head snaps over to Harry's room.

"He isn't awake yet, darling." She sighs, and your shoulders slump down. "I'm here now, if you want to get some rest. You should rest."

You slowly shake your head. "I want to be with him."

"YN…"

"No!" You shout, causing a frown to form on your face at the shock of your own tone. "I'm sorry, Anne."

"It's alright, darling." She moves to sit in the chair next to yours, placing her palm on your back as she rubs it up and down to soothe you. "S'gonna be alright."

Tears flood immediately, and your face drops into your hands.

"I can't… I don't…" you utter, unable to keep your mind from beginning to think the worst.

She wraps her arm around your shoulders. "It's going… it's going to be alright… it's going to be alright."

She rests the side of her head against yours, as her own tears start to fall down her cheeks.

•••

Two days you've both been there, waiting. Calling family, friends, your boss, his boss… and waiting. Unable to give any updates, unable to give any answers, unable to process any of what happened, and unable to do anything but wait.

It is your turn for what you and Anne are calling a 'shift'. One of you stays in Harry's room, while the other takes a break to grab some food or coffee, reply to those texts and calls with no new information, and to clear the chaos of thoughts swirling around in your head.

You find the coffee machine that has the least disgusting choices, which are nothing to be excited about, and fill up two cups.

As you come back up to Harry's door, you notice a few more people have entered, and you take a deep breath before you walk in.

As you move around to where you see Anne standing, your gaze darts over to follow hers, seeing Harry's gorgeous and deep green eyes open for the first time since that daunting night.

"Oh my god." You whisper, handing Anne her coffee, as you try to keep your composure while the doctor explains the situation.

"Harry, you've suffered a TBI, which is a traumatic brain injury. Do you remember what happened?"

Harry just shakes his head.

"You were in a car accident, sweetheart." Anne exclaims, eyes flickering to yours with an grateful and relieved expression.

You just want to hold him, and kiss him, and nuzzle into his neck as you feel the joy of finally seeing him awake again.

"I… I was?"

"Now, we don't really know the extent of your injury. Only time, and maybe a few tests, will tell. But you are awake, and that's the first step. It's a good sign."

"Oh my god! I'm so glad you're okay!" You blurt out, rushing to the bedside just to touch his arm.

"Oh… Umm… Were you in the accident too?"

"Yeah, but I'm okay. Just some scratches, and bruising." You smile, squeezing his forearm, relieved to feel the muscles contract.

"I'm… I'm sorry." He utters.

"Don't be, Harry. It wasn't your fault."

"Oh. So…" He pinches the bridge of his nose. "So… does that mean… your car hit mine?"

"What?"

"Did we crash into each other?... Or…?"

"Sweetheart, now is not the time to joke around."

"Harry. It's me. YN."

"I'm sorry… I don't know… I don't think we've met…"

Suddenly, your heart stops and you stand up straight, taking a step back from the hospital bed.

"What?" You whisper, turning your head directly to the doctor.

"It's possible he is suffering from some memory loss. There was no brain bleed, but we can order some tests to see if we can get some more answers."

"Thank you Doctor Green." Anne replies.

The nurse checks the monitors and they both exit the room, leaving the three of you alone to process everything that just happened.

"Harry, you really don't remember YN?"

He stares at you and simply shakes his head.

"She is your girlfriend. You live together. You… you love her."

"That… no… what? No… That's not right…" He states, running a hand through his hair, and clearing his throat. The telltale sign that he is nervous. "I'm… I'm with Tabitha…"

Now your heart sinks, and your stomach turns to knots, as Harry claims to be with the woman he was once with. The woman who came before you. The woman who he told you had hurt him tremendously.

"Is she here?" He asks, and you turn around as tears return to the corners of your eyes. "I... would like to see her."

"Sweetheart-"

"No, Anne." You grab her hand and give it a small squeeze. "It's okay."

"Y/N…"

"He's probably overwhelmed, and needs some time. It's okay." You state, hoping your shaky voice seemed steady enough to convince her of some sincerity in your words.

She nods, and you turn back to Harry, displaying the most minimal smile you can manage.

"I'll see about getting you some food."

"Thank you… umm… YN?" He replies. "But please no chicken noodle soup… I hate it."

Your head drops and you let out a deep sigh.

"I know."

You open and exit through the door, taking a couple of steps until you are out of their view. Your hands cover your face and your back slides down against the wall, tears streaming down in a sob as your heart begins to break.

•••

The test results did not bring any comfort. There was nothing visible to indicate any concerning physical trauma, which is actually common.

The neurological exams determined that Harry has good motor function, reflexes, and coordination. But, it was confirmed that Harry was suffering from retrograde amnesia, and it's unknown how long it will take for him to get his memories back, if he ever does.

This is Harry. The love of your life. The man who dragged you outside into a storm because you told him you'd never been kissed in the rain. The man who learned to make your coffee order just so that you could stay just a few extra minutes at home with him before heading to work. The man who sat on the bathroom floor with you, all night, holding you while you cried.

He means everything to you. Everything.

So... how can what they're saying be true?

How can it be true that you mean nothing to him, because he doesn't remember you?

But he doesnt. He does not remember you. He does not remember your relationship, the entire two years and a half years that you've been together. He does not remember your first date, your coffee order, or your love for each other.

As if that wasn't heartbreaking enough, the person he does remember being with, the one he does remember loving, is the one who actually broke his own heart.

Tabitha.

Nothing, literally nothing, can prepare you for this. What are you even supposed to do now?

•••

As you stare out the window, you feel those strong, warm, tattooed arms wrap around you from behind, and Harry's lips on your cheek.

"So…"

"I love it! Absolutely love it!"

"I knew you would! This is ours, Cupcake. Our new home together."

You twirl around to face him, being met with a wide, dimpled grin. You wrap your arms around his neck as your lips hover in front of his.

"I can't wait to get our furniture in here and really make it feel like us. It's what I do best!"

A mischievous smirk displays across his face. "Well, the bed is set up, I can make you feel something right now… I'd like to think that's what I do best."

It has been decided, moderately protested by Harry, that you will take him back to your place. Hopefully the familiar surroundings can help him regain some memories, or at least bring him some comfort.

"I'm sorry the elevator was a bit loud. They keep telling us they'll fix it soon, but you know how that goes…" Your eyes widen with your statement. "Or… umm… I'm sorry."

"S'alright." He states, looking down at his feet as you slide the key into your front door. "I do know how those things go."

"Right. Of course." You shake your head as the door opens, and you toss your keys on the entry table.

Your eyes stay fixated on him as he looks around the place, his gaze stopping every once in a while on different items, but quickly returning to scan his surroundings.

"Do… you remember anything here?" You ask timidly.

"Not really." He lets out a deep sigh. "It, umm, it feels like it could be mine, though."

You stay quiet, continuing to let him embrace the living space.

"Where… umm… where is the bathroom?" He asks. "I'd like to take a shower, if that is okay?"

You clear your throat, hoping to keep yourself steady. "Oh, yeah, it's, uh, right through here."

You make your way to the bathroom, and open the bedroom door.

"Your clothes are in here." You state, opening his drawers.

"Thanks." He replies, grabbing a pair of shorts and his favorite shirt. He's had it forever. Longer than he's known you. Long enough to still remember it.

"I can order some food, if you want." You suddenly state.

He shrugs. "Sure. What's your favorite?"

Tasty Palace. But there's no way you're suggesting that. Maybe not ever again.

"There's Chico's." You reply, staring at your hands as you pick your nails. Harry stays quiet, and when your eyes move back over to see his confused expression, you realize your mistake. "Oh. Umm… it's a Mexican restaurant down the street. You… you like it."

"Okay." He shrugs. "Would… you mind just ordering what you… know… I'll like?"

"Of course." You smile, leaving the room and closing the door behind you.

•••

After sitting in silence, eating as much as you can manage with your new lack of appetite, Harry finally speaks.

"This is awkward to ask…" he swirls his fork around on his plate. "But, are we… going to sleep… in the same bed tonight?"

If you didn't know that the current situation was the cause of the pain, you would've been sure you were having a heart attack. Your chest tightens and your breath escapes you.

It's not even something you had thought about until this moment.

"That's up to you." You look up at him, hoping your expression gives him some ease.

"It's just… because… umm, I feel-"

"Harry, it's okay. This is…" you sigh. "Weird. For you."

"This isn't weird for you?" He asks, and you actually see his subtle, genuine smile push through for a moment. The one he does when he thinks he's done something cheeky.

You can't help but almost cough out a laugh. "Oh, it's definitely weird. But probably not as bad since I'm the one that…"

"Remembers." He nods.

"I can't imagine how you feel. And if sleeping separately is more comfortable for you, then that's what we will do."

"Umm, m'sorry, I think it might." His gaze flickers up to you before shooting back down to his plate.

"Okay." You reply. "Are you wanting to go to bed now?"

He nods.

"Okay. Let me clear the plates and I'll just grab my stuff out of the bedroom."

"What?" His eyes finally meet yours for more than a few seconds, and for a moment, you get lost in them. Those beautiful, bright green eyes that you've stared at a million times.

"Oh, so I can sleep on the futon in the office."

He shakes his head. "Absolutely not. I'll sleep there."

"Harry, you've been laying in a hospital bed for the past few days. You can sleep in the bed. It's fine."

"I can't do that to you. M'sorry. This is your-"

You both fall silent, your gazes immediately dropping to the floor. Your breathing quickens slightly and you look up to him before tears trickle down your cheeks. Your chest is tight, but you don't want to push this and make things more uncomfortable for him than it already is.

"Okay. Thank you. But let me know if you change your mind." You state, doing the best to send him a smile.

"Alright." He quietly replies.

You grab his pillow, a clean sheet, along with one of his most used blankets, and help him make it comfortable.

Once it's done, you both stand there, staring at the bed, not really knowing what to do next.

"Well, uh, yeah, goodnight." You mutter, maneuvering your way towards your bedroom, and stopping in the doorway.

"Goodnight, YN."

"I love you." Your eyes widen immediately and you wince at your words.

"Oh… umm… yeah… I…"

"It's okay, Harry. I'm sorry. Have a good night." You blurt out, rushing to the bedroom and closing the door.

You immediately flop onto your bed, simply shimmying off your pants, and curling under the covers. The bed feels larger, and colder. It doesn't feel right. But of course, none of this feels right.

Suddenly, the sobbing starts, and you bury your head in your pillow, hoping and praying and wishing -doing anything and everything you can- to have your Harry back in the morning.

•••

As your body begins to shift, your mind begins to wake up, and you can smell the scent of breakfast wafting through the house.

You open your eyes and instinctively reach over to the other side of the bed, before sighing and getting up to throw on some comfortable clothes.

You walk out and see Harry fumbling his way through the kitchen, opening and closing some cabinets before moving on to the next.

"Good morning." You state softly.

"Oh fuck!" He shouts, jumping and spinning around to see your face. "M'sorry, umm yeah, good morning."

He pulls his lips inward, telling you he is embarrassed by his reaction.

"Sorry I scared you." You chuckle.

"S'alright." He replies, a tiny blush appearing in his cheeks. "M'trying to find the mugs…"

"Oh!" You move into the kitchen, standing next to him, feeling his warmth, and point to the cabinet above you. "You were almost there."

"Fucks sake." He mumbles as he shakes his head, opening it up and looking at his options. He points to a white one, with a smirk growing on his face. "Whose is this?"

Your eyes follow his finger to the mug with big, bold letters printed on it, spelling out the words 'Fuck it'. You can't help but giggle.

"Yours."

His smirk grows a bit deeper to show off your favorite dimple. "Yeah, that tracks."

He pulls it down and fills it up. "I still… umm… drink black coffee, yeah?"

You nod. You bring down a plain mug, filling it up and adding some vanilla caramel creamer from the fridge.

"So… I, umm… took a while to find everything, but I made some pancakes if you want some... I hope that's okay?"

"Of course it is. They're your favorite." You clear your throat. "Thank you."

He plates a few for the both of you and moves to sit at the kitchen table, followed closely by you.

"You have an appointment this morning." You state, causing him to look up from his plate.

"Already?" He asks, his brow furrowing in the way it always does when he is slightly confused.

"I guess that's normal with brain injuries." You quietly reply. Just saying those words makes you feel queasy.

"M'kay." He shrugs.

"But your mom wants to have us over later, if you want to do that."

"Yes!" Harry exclaims, excitement in his tone for the first time since last week.

"Alright. Good." You nod, taking one last bite of pancakes before standing to clear your plate.

You move around your chair, your plate in hand, and lean down over Harry's head, placing a kiss on top.

He clears his throat and his eyes flicker up to you for only a moment before you straighten up.

"Shit." You mumble. "I'm so sorry. It's just a habit. Well… for me… not for you, I guess… not anymore… I need to shut up."

Your free hand covers your face and you stumble into your chair as you try to make your way into the kitchen.

As you place your plate in the sink, trying to compose yourself, you hear Harry's chair squeak across the floor and feel his warm presence close by.

"Umm…" Harry utters. "M'sorry this is weird for you too, YN."

Your eyes shoot up to his. His gorgeous green eyes, that once looked at you with vibrancy, but now just stare back at you with uncertainty.

"It's…" you inhale a deep breath, turning your gaze back down to the sink. "It's not about me. It's about you. Getting you… back to you…"

He chuckles, placing his plate on top of yours in the sink, and beginning to walk toward the office. "Whatever that means."

Exactly. What does that even mean? Because, who is he now? What if he never gets back to being… your Harry?

•••

"So, Harry, how are you feeling this morning?" Dr. Green asks.

"M'fine." Harry reluctantly replies.

"How are you really feeling?" She asks again.

He sighs, looking down at his hands and fidgeting with his rings. "Sore."

"What's sore?"

"Everything."

She nods, typing his answers into her computer, then looking over to you.

"And what about motor function, balance, things like that? Have you noticed any changes Miss YLN?"

You sit up straighter, not realizing you'd be asked any questions. "Uh… everything has seemed fine."

"Good. Good." She types again. "And now, let's discuss memory. Any improvement?"

Your head drops down too and you hear Harry sigh.

"I… umm… it's… it's just…" He stutters.

You quickly look over to him, watching his fidgeting increase, and turn your gaze to Dr. Green.

You lean over, placing your hand on Harry's forearm like you always did when he was anxious.

"I'll wait in the lobby." You state. He lifts his head and looks over to you, only responding with a nod.

You get up, your chest tight at the thought of Harry, your Harry, feeling more comfortable without you by his side.

You exit the room and find the closest chair, starting to feel faint again, like you did that first night in the hospital.

"Are you alright, Miss?"

You look up to see a nurse glancing over from the front desk of the office.

"Yeah. I'm okay. Just…" You breathe in to try and gain some control of your lungs. "It's just a lot."

"These things are." She nods. "But he's lucky to have you here with him."

"Mhmm." You mumble.

"It's so important and helpful to have the people who love him, and who he loves, around to support him."

You scrunch your face, staring at the ground, as your heart starts to sink.

The people who love him. Yes. But the people who he loves? That might not be you anymore.

The door opens and you stand up to join Harry as he shakes the doctor's hand.

"As long as nothing gets worse, we will see you in a week, Mr. Styles." She looks at you and you nod in confirmation. "Remember to relax and let your brain heal itself. Don't pressure yourself. But do those few, small tasks to exercise it too. It could help regain those memories for you."

"Thank you Dr. Green." Harry replies.

You shake her hand and lead Harry back to the car.

As you settle into the driver's seat, you look over to see a solemn expression on his face.

"Would you like to go back home… back to the apartment… first? Or straight to your mom's?"

He perks up at the last suggestion. "My mum's! Umm… yes, my mum's please."

"Sounds good."

"You… umm… know the way. Yeah?" He mutters.

"Yep." You state casually. "I do."

•••

"Should I bring something? I feel like I should bring something."

"You're biting your thumbnail again."

"I'm nervous!" You exclaim.

"You're really cute when you're nervous." Harry smirks.

"I'm meeting your mum. I want her to like me!"

Harry stands up from the couch, walking over and pressing his body right up against yours, the sweet scent of his favorite Tom Ford cologne instantly calming you.

"She's gonna love ya." He states, kissing your forehead as you grab onto his arms. "How could she not? I do!"

The drive to Anne's house is usually quick, but feels painfully long today, with your thudding heartbeat being the only noise you can hear on the car ride over.

You let out a small sigh of relief as you pull up into the driveway, but feel a little disappointed when you hear Harry do the same.

Anne immediately opens the door once you knock, and wraps Harry into a big hug.

"Bloody hell, Mum. I'd like to breathe, if that's alright." Harry whines.

"I get to hug you as tight as I bloody well please, thank you very much." She replies, releasing him and pushing him into the house.

"Alright, fair enough. M'gonna grab something to eat." He walks right through the doorway and straight into the kitchen.

"At least he still remembers where things are in this house." You sigh.

"So nothing's changed?" She whispers, shutting the door behind you, as you both stand in the entryway.

You shake your head and cross both arms around your body.

"I don't know what to do Anne."

She wraps you into a big hug, one palm rubbing up and down your back for comfort.

"It'll be alright, darling. I just know it will." She pulls away, grabbing both sides of your face and lifting it to meet her intense gaze. "It'll be alright. I love my son, but I also love you, and I'm here for you too. Yes?"

"Okay." You whisper, choking back to lump in your throat.

"Let's go sit." She suggests, guiding you into the living room. As you walk in, you see Harry sprawled across the sofa, humming a tune and peeling a banana. He looks comfortable right there. But even better, or maybe worse, he also looks happy right there.

"Your sister will be by in a bit." Anne states, causing Harry to look up with a distinctly mischievous smirk. More noticeable than the one last night. It shows off one dimple, his left one, every time. It's a dead giveaway that he's about to throw out some major sass.

"I remember her being a pain in the ass." He chuckles. "I remember that correctly, yeah?"

"Harry…"

"M'just checking, Mum. Just tryna remember the important thing-" His eyes shoot over to yours and your stomach drops. You do your best to give him a small smile, and even a shrug, hoping he will believe that you don't mind.

Because who wouldn't mind the love of their life not even remembering that they love you, right?

The doorbell rings and you are snapped out of your thoughts, thankfully, as you see Gemma walking through the door.

"YN! Lady! I've missed you!" She exclaims, walking over and giving you a tight hug. "I'd ask how you've been but…"

She pulls away, holding both of your shoulders in her grasp, and stares into your eyes.

"Yeah." You shrug.

"M'fine by the way!" Harry shouts, grabbing his head and groaning from raising his voice. You reach in your bag and hand some medication to Gemma, as she makes her way over to him.

"Okay, lil brother, this'll be a rare sappy moment from me…" She hands him the pill and squats down next to his spot on the sofa. "But, I'm so glad you're okay. How are you feeling?"

"Yeah. Umm. M'fine, I guess. Everything hurts." He mumbles as he swallows the medication. His eyes flicker over to you before looking back to her. "And m'confused as fuck."

You grab a glass from the cupboard and pour some water, taking a gulp to swallow the lump in your throat.

Gemma's gaze then flickers over to you, and you see her smile. "Well, I know YN has always been good at taking care of you when you're sick so you're in good hands."

"M'not sick, Gem. I'm injured." He replies, with the stern furrow of his brow, that you know means he's fully serious.

"I know. Still applies." Gemma shrugs, kissing his forehead and standing back up.

"Harry, sweetheart, I pulled out a photo album." Anne states, pulling a large book off of the kitchen counter. "I thought you could take a look. Maybe it'll help to jog your memory."

"Can I please just relax first?" He sighs, leaning his head against the back of the sofa. "Feels good to finally relax."

"But-"

You place your hand on Anne's. "He's right. He should relax."

She returns your gaze with the most compassionate expression that eyes can give someone, and reluctantly nods.

"Maybe later then." She replies, placing the photo album back on the counter.

"Mhmm." He hums, placing his hands behind his head and closing his eyes.

Anne motions for you and Gemma to follow her to the backyard, and you walk out to the patio.

You sit down in a large, cushioned patio chair, and bring your knees up to your chest, wrapping your arms around them for comfort.

"So, what did the doctor say?" Anne asks.

"Not much when I was in the room." You shrug. "Just that he needs to relax, not to pressure himself too much."

"Anything about his memory loss?" Gemma asks, and you shake your head.

"I guess she gave him some things he can do to help but…" You sigh. "I don't know."

"YN. It'll be alright." Anne states.

"I know he'll be fine." You reply, feeling your voice start to shake and some tears start to form. "But… I'm… I'm like a stranger to him now."

Anne shakes her head. "He'll remember."

"He loves you!" Gemma adds.

As you rest your chin on your knees, the tears begin to fall.

"Does he? Because I'm worried he won't remember that he does. And…" Your breath begins to quicken. "I'm worried he won't again."

They both move to sit on either side of you, on the arms of the chair, and run their hands up and down your back.

"It's been one day." Anne whispers. "I know it's hard. Give it a bit of time. He loves and adores you. He'll remember. It'll be alright."

You don't respond. You just bury your face in your knees and begin to let the tears flow freely. Anne kisses your head and both ladies stand up.

"We'll be inside." She whispers, and you hear the back door shut.

You know she's right. It's only day one and you're thinking the worst? You can't give up that quickly. And you have got to be strong for him.

You let out the last few tears that are sitting at the corners of your eyes, take in a deep breath, and shake out your hands.

You make your way back inside and to the living room to find Anne, Harry, and Gemma sitting on the sofa, flipping through the photo album Anne had pulled out earlier.

"These are your students at a recital last year." Anne states, directing Harry's attention to a photo in the middle of the page. In it, he had a huge grin of his face as he kneeled between three kids, their instruments in hand.

"So I still work at Edison Arts Academy?" He asks, looking up at his mom with a smile, seeing her nod. "Good."

"And this is you, Sarah, and Mitch at a gig downtown." Gemma points to another photo. "You remember them right?"

"F'course!" He exclaims. "But… we actually played gigs? That used to just be a dream I had."

"You were… are… really good." You chime in.

"I'd hope so. Otherwise I'd be glad to not remember embarrassing m'self."

He looks over the rest of the page and flips it over, landing on one filled with photos of just the two of you. Things he remembers absolutely nothing about.

"I… we… went to Jamaica?" He questions, his finger placed on top of a specific photo, which you took as he sat in front of a jerk chicken stand.

"Yes. You, YN, and a few of your friends." Anne responds.

"Never… I never thought I'd do that…"

"You volunteered for a summer program over there, to help teach kids to read music." You state.

"Oh… okay… that makes sense." He quickly looks to his side to meet your gaze. "So, do you teach as well?"

"Oh. No. You had asked me to go with you all. So we could have a little vacation together too." You clear your throat and sit up straighter.

"Oh." He looks back down at the photos. "That sounds nice."

You smile to yourself, remembering the late nights with everyone on the beach and the fit of giggles you burst into when trying to get up on the surfboards. Remembering the walks around the town with a delicious Jamaican coffee in one hand, and Harry gripping onto the other. Remembering the glow he constantly had on his face after those morning classes, beaming with pride over a student who had learned to play a new song.

"It really was."

He flips through some more pages, stopping to look at some photos of Christmas spent with his whole family, a couple of his cousin's new baby, and one particular photo that you didn't even know existed until this moment.

Anne holds the page down before Harry can move on, pulling out the photo and holding it in both of her hands.

"This is one of my favorites of you two."

You lean in closer, as does Harry, and see yourself sitting next to him on a piano bench. Your head is resting on his shoulder as his fingers press down on the keys.

"When was this?" You ask, looking back up at Anne.

"It was last spring, when I was really sick." She replies. "You both took the day off to take care of me. And when I came out from an afternoon nap, seeing this, I…"

She pauses and wipes some tears from her cheeks, holding the photo against her chest before bringing it back down to her lap.

"S'alright, Mum." Harry says, gently, rubbing his hand over hers. "What were you saying?"

She looks over to him with a smile, and then to you, turning her body slightly more towards yours. "It was the moment I knew that you truly loved Harry. And that we were important to you too."

Your eyes fill with tears again as you wrap each other in a hug.

"It's going to be alright." She whispers, pulling away and nodding when she meets your eyes.

Your attention is suddenly taken by Harry, watching as he pinches the bridge of his nose and groans.

"Fuck. This is a lot…" He mumbles. "I think I need to take a break."

"I'm sorry." You scoot away on the couch.

"No… you don't… you don't need to be sorry." He states, quickly meeting your gaze. "It's just…"

"A lot." You sigh.

He nods.

"Umm… I was thinking… I'll take a nap."

"Yeah, that's good." You reply.

"Mum, does my old room still have a bed?"

"It's a guest room, so yes. There's extra blankets in the closet." Anne states.

"My favorite one?"

Anne looks over to you, and you begin to bite your thumbnail, before quickly composing yourself and looking back up to him.

"It's at our place. You brought it with you when we moved in."

"Oh… okay. S'fine." He mutters, giving his mom a kiss on her forehead and stopping next to you. "I'll… be in there then."

You give him a small smile and turn around to watch him walk down the hallway.

"Do you want to take a nap too darling? You can use my bed, I just put on fresh sheets." Anne asks. "You deserve a rest too."

"No. Thank you." You sigh. "I think I'm gonna use the restroom and then sit outside again."

She gives you a kiss on your temple and moves to put away the photo album, so you head to the bathroom.

As you get inside, you splash some water on your face and dry off with a towel. You place your hands on either side of the sink, staring down at the drain, and wonder what it would be like to just get washed away. Find yourself somewhere else, and not have to deal with all of this.

You shake your head to shake out those thoughts. You can't feel sorry for yourself. Harry is going through a much harder time than you, and feeling down isn't going to help anyone. You're here for him. He needs you, even if he doesn't know it. He needs you, right?

You open the bathroom door and begin to walk back down the hallway, when you hear some hushed chatter coming from the guest room. You can't help but to stop where you are, unsure if you should listen in, but unable to move in any other direction.

"It's just weird, Mum. It's so weird." Harry whispers. "I don't know her."

"You do, Harry. You know her, and you love her." Anne replies.

"Everything is just so strange. So different. So confusing." You hear him sigh. "Like, this guest room feels more familiar than that flat I apparently have now."

"Just give it time, sweetheart." She utters. "I promise, it's a great life you have now."

You hear him sigh again, and your chest feels tight. It hurts that things aren't back to normal, but it hurts more that it's causing him so much uneasiness.

You head to the kitchen, turning on the sink and grabbing the dish soap.

Anne walks in and stands right next to you. "You're doing this to distract yourself, aren't you?"

You look up at her and nod. She knows you. You love that she knows you. At least one of them does.

"Alright. I'll be watching some shows. You don't need to clean the whole house, so join me when you're done."

"I will."

"YN…" She squints in your direction, waiting until you meet her gaze. "Please. Come relax with me when you're done."

"Okay. I will."

•••

Footsteps down the hallway cause you to look up from your phone, and sit up on the sofa.

Harry appears, running his hand through his hair as he looks over to you.

"Hi." You utter. "Good nap?"

"Mhmm." He replies. "Definitely need it. Where's my mum?"

He looks around the room.

"Oh, uh, she got called into work. And Gemma had some plans or something."

"Alright…" He replies. "So, should… we just head out then?"

"If you want to."

He shrugs. "Nothing else to really do, s'pose."

"Right. Okay."

You both grab your things and head to the car.

As you pull out of the driveway and head down the main road, you turn on the radio. You figure it'll feel like a long trip back, so some music will help ease the uncomfortable silence.

"I love this song." Harry states, as the first chords of a Rolling Stones song begin to play.

"You sing it all the time." You reply. "You actually play it at some of your gigs."

"I do?" He rubs the back of his neck, a sign that he feels awkward. "Guess that makes sense."

He turns to look out the window, tapping his fingers on his thigh, and humming along to the song.

"Hey… umm… would you rather stay at your mom's house?" You sigh, readying yourself for the answer you assume is soon to follow.

There is silence. You're not sure if that's any better than a quick response.

"Harry?" You utter, looking over to him as he stares out the car window.

"Hmm?" His head turns to you. "Sorry."

"It's okay." You look back to the road. "I was just saying, uh, that if you'd rather stay with your mom then I understand."

Out of the corner of your eye, you can see his head drop as he fidgets with his hands. He's nervous.

"I… umm… no." He utters, and your head shoots back over to him. "It's… it's only fair to you… for me to try to, like, remember…"

"I don't want to put any pressure on you." You reply, trying to hold back the sudden, but subtle, fluttering you feel inside.

"No. No. You're not." He gives you a small smile, then furrows his brow slightly as he looks back down. "I want to… remember… I want to make sense of things. Y'know?"

"Yeah." You nod, turning back to the road with a tiny smile yourself.

Maybe this will work out. Maybe it will actually be alright. Maybe you'll get your Harry back.

"Is there anything specific you wanna know? Or do?" You ask timidly.

"Umm…" He shrugs. "What do you do? Like… for a job?"

"I'm an interior decorator for businesses."

"What does that entail?"

"I help businesses create an interior atmosphere that works best for the space that they have." You pause, noticing out of the corner of your eye that his gaze is fixated on you. He's always been an attentive listener, and it's nice to see that hasn't changed. "But, in basic terms, I pick wall colors and help place furniture in offices and restaurants."

He chuckles, and god you've missed that sound.

"I once heard… that the color blue… helps to decrease your appetite… like mindless snacking."

You unintentionally let out a big laugh.

"Is… is that wrong?" He asks quietly.

You shake your head and take a few breaths to calm down your reaction.

"No." You giggle once more, then clear your throat and completely compose yourself. "No. It's right. You just… you said the exact same thing the first time I told you what I do."

"I see." He chuckles again. "So… where… where did we meet?"

You instinctually bite your lower lip, looking over at him to see his wide eyes and lips pulled in, the expression he uses when he is calmly waiting for an answer from you.

"At a coffee shop called Way Cup."

"Way Cup?" He smiles. "Oh I get it. Clever."

"We… can go there if you want?" You bite the inside of your cheek, nervous and uncertain of what his answer will be, and how it'll feel to take him there.

"Umm… sure! Sounds nice." He agrees, and a mild flittering reappears inside.

•••

"Oh shit! Oh my god! I am so sorry!"

"S'alright." Harry chuckles. "Minor wounds to my sweater."

You shake the coffee off your hands, throw the now empty cup away, and pick up the cupcake you had just dropped on the ground.

"Poor thing didn't serve it's purpose."

"M'sorry… what?" Harry asks, causing you to finally look up to see the most beautiful green eyes you've ever come across.

"I… uh…" You let out a breathy exhale of a laugh. "I was treating myself. The cupcake was my reward. Now that it's on the ground, it doesn't get to do the job it was made for."

And now you are witness to the deepest, dimpled smile you've ever laid eyes on.

"That's poetic." He replies.

"Also makes me feel less guilty for indulging in it."

He looks down at the hand of yours that's covered in frosting, and then down at his sweater.

"Well, I think I need to get some napkins inside. And I'd love to help another cupcake achieve it's baked good goals. Can I buy you another, and a coffee?"

You feel your cheeks flush.

"It was my fault. You don't need to do that."

"I'd like to. To be fair, I wasn't really paying attention either." He motions towards the cafe door and you nod, leading the way back inside.

You reach the counter and order a foamed vanilla latte with caramel and another cupcake.

"Wow. You really like your sugar."

"Hey, I told you I am treating myself." You smile. "Plus, isn't that how life should be?"

"How's that?" He asks, with a raised eyebrow and a smirk to match his curiosity.

"Sweet." You bite your lower lip. "Life should always be sweet."

You both sit in silence at your table by the front window.

"So we met in this coffee shop." He nods as he stares down at his mug.

"Technically outside."

"Right." He nods again. "And we came here a lot?"

"Yeah."

"Hmm." He continues his head movements. "I just… wasn't normally one to… go out for coffee…"

"Yeah." You shrug.

"How long ago?... Like… how long ago did we meet?"

You begin to bite your thumbnail as you pretend to do a quick calculation in your head. But you know the answer.

"About two and a half years ago."

"Two and a half years?" He exclaims. "I've lost two and a half years?"

"Well…"

"What?" He looks up to you and scrunches his face.

"It's more like, three years. If…" You feel a knot forming in your stomach. "If you remember being with your ex…"

"For fucks sake!"

He rests his elbows on the table and runs his hands over his face.

"M'sorry, Harry." You whisper, holding back the tears beginning to appear.

"I just… I don't…" He sighs, now resting his face in his hands. "How can I… not remember?"

"I need to know something." You state timidly.

"Alright…"

"What is the last thing that you do actually remember?" You immediately regret asking, your heart bracing itself for some hurt that is inevitably headed in your direction.

His eyes shoot up to yours.

"Are you sure?... Like, I don't…" He clears his throat. "I don't want to… make you uncomfortable…"

"I want to know." You shrug, looking down and biting your nail again. "Maybe we can figure out where to start."

"Well… I remember… getting ready for an event…" He furrows his brow, wrapping one arm across his body and bringing the other hand to pull on his lower lip. "A fancy event. I was in a suit."

You know. You know exactly what event it was.

"I think…" You sigh, feeling another large knot forming within. "I think I might have a way to help you out, with the memories."

"What's that?"

"I think there's someone who could maybe help clear things up…"

"Oh?" Harry perks up. "Who?"

Your eyes squeeze shut, and so does your heart, as you take in a deep breath. You can't believe you are about to say it.

"Tabitha."

~~~~~

Series Masterlist

If you'd like to send extra support, I love coffee 💗Bee xx

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Welcome to @f10werfae 's library of Tom Holland Enjoy your stay!

Here is my main masterlist for everyone else I write for!

[🌟] Favourites/Popular

[☁️] Fluff

[*] Smut

[🌧️] Angst

library blog of works: @f10werfaes-cosy-collection

-To request, please send in an Ask or PM me

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

• Babyboy [☁️🌧️*]

(Boyfriend!Tom Holland x Older!GF!Reader)

: Tom meets Y/n's narcissistic older sister S/n who wants Tom all to herself; Y/n gets overprotective of her babyboy, showing just how possessive she really is (Tom is 26, Reader is 31) (fluff ending!)

•My Own Milf [☁️*]

(Tom Holland x older!GF!Reader)

: Fans retell the best moments of what they see from tom holland and Y/n's spicy relationship (Tom is 26, Reader is 31)

• What Age Gap? [☁️]

(Tom Holland x Older!Reader)

: Tom is absolutely smitten with his older lover, in fact he's not willing to let her go. Ever.

•Winner Winner, Chicken Dinner [☁️]

(Soccer!College!Tom Holland × Quiet! Reader)

: Tom teases and gushes over his shy bookworm of a girlfriend, which includes bringing her everywhere with him and making sure she's well fed

•Holland’s Girl [☁️)

(Boyfriend!Tom x Cavill!Reader)

: Fans go crazy on twitter now that Henry Cavill’s little sister is dating Tom Holland

• Secret Sex Tape [☁️*]

(Tom Holland × Mackie!Reader)

: Y/n and Tom’s cuddling session is interrupted by a very scary revel

• Talk To Me

(Tom Holland × Deaf!Hair Stylist!Reader)

: Tom tries to win the heart of Y/n L/n, the only way he sees fit

.Butterfly Kicks (Tom Holland x Older!Pregnant!Wife!Reader) :A drabble of Older!Y/n and Tom’s pregnancy journey 🫶🫶 (Reader is 33, Tom is 28) (Milf Reader)

•Titty comfort

(Frat!Tom Holland × Girlfriend!Reader)

: When Tom can't fall asleep, he turns to his girlfriend's breasts for a lot of comfort (Breast play) (lowkey subby tom?)

Youtube

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Series Masterlist:

IN PROGRESS SERIES

Daddies Girl: 36 year old Ethan Dolan, divorced single dad with a daughter riddled with mommy issues. Seemingly unstable and incapable of loving anyone besides his daughter—he steps foot into a no strings attached love affair with his daughters bestfriend. Lighting an Inferno of emotions.

Roses: Ethan can’t seem to find it in him to hurt you the way you crave, confiding in his twin brother is something he’s always done. This time when Ethan asks for advice, his gets a lot more than he bargained for.

Most Wanted: Detective Grayson Dolan is three months into his biggest case to date. His make or break moment. The murder of Antoniette May Clark. With developing intel on the rise, the last thing Grayson was expecting was to be blindsided by his soon to be ex-wife who’s just been assigned lead on his holy grail of cases.

Love After Death: When Ethan’s girlfriend, Tahlia Lamont, manages to deliver a healthy baby girl after a serious accident before ultimately succumbing to her extensive injuries—you’re left to pick up the pieces.

Camden Valley: Camden Valley has its long history—for a blink and you’ll miss it town, Ethan Dolan’s pretty well educated. When you move to town and start experiencing things that go bump in the night? Local ratbag Grayson Dolan introduces you to his not so social twin.

Timekeeper: Sometimes? we let money, fame and fortune get the better of us - it’s only when we finally lose the ones we love the most in this world, suddenly a single dollar holds no value.

Calliope.Reed Original character series in which we follow Ethan Dolan on his journey with the whirlwind girl that stole his heart. 

Bookworm: a series where Ethan Dolan falls in love with a girl who loves all things written. Which just so happens to play out in the same timeline as Grayson and Y/n from the clumsy in love series.

Clumsy in love: a series where Grayson Dolan is in love with an extremely clumsy girl. Which just so happens to play out in the same timeline as Laura and Ethan from the bookworm series

Spud: Chelsea (Spud) y/l/n is your pride and joy. As a single mum at a very young age you devoted the first two years of your daughters life to loving her, being the best mum you could possibly be. It was always you and your spud ~ Until you met Grayson Dolan.

The Marksman: When Grayson Dolan, the most senior chief sniper with the NCIS, is called to a hostage situation. He comes face to face with his greatest fear in life. His fiancée is on the hostage list.

The waitress: Ethan Dolan didn’t make a first Great impression - in fact? He was the last person you wanted to see again. But he couldn’t stay away.

Kids see ghost: You have a gift - you can see, hear, touch and talk to those who have past. It’s an all round thing that never truly goes away. Although you try suppress and deny your truly unique gift. In fear those you love will call you crazy -insane even. Halloween is always the strongest time of year - when the vail is at it thinnest and ghost of things past roam the earth as they once did.

Stranglehold: Grayson Dolan is one hell of a boxer, who just so happens to fall head first madly in love with a lover of all things history. A lover not a fighter.

Jealously: Bestfriend Grayson is extremely jealous over your ‘friendship’ with his camera Kyle. It’s nothing but a toxic triangle of lust and jealously - that you are very much addicted to.

Eye spy: Ethan Dolan. Criminal. Employed by some of the worlds most notorious crime bosses to take out the competition and keep their hands clean. You. Undercover law enforcement. Employed by the FBI to track down dangerous criminals - that would just so happen to include…..Ethan Dolan.

Bisexual!Ethan: Being bestfriends with Ethan and Grayson Dolan was always easy. Until you and Ethan started crushing on the same guy - their trusted cameraman and loyal friend. Kyle.

Worldgym: Ethan Dolan had no idea what to expect when he saw you walk through the threshold of the world gym he and his brother Grayson worked at.

DT entertainment - CEO!E: Ethan & Grayson Dolan. CEO’s of DT Entertainment - Grayson a smooth talking charm the pants off you type businessman. Ethan? A don’t take no for an answer, ruthless, cold hearted employer who’s only soft for his family.

Halftime: high school isn’t always easy, especially when you’re in love with Grayson Dolan.

COMPLETED SERIES.

A cheaters charm: Grayson Dolan had the world, until he started on a downwards spiral of heartbreak, betrayal and adultery. You thought you had the perfect man, until you found out he’d been unfaithful, dishonest and manipulative. But what’s even worse then being a cheater?

Dorm room: Frat!e series. Written with @persistence-ofmemories

Love me love me not: Bestfriend Grayson loves you. He loves you possibly more than he loves himself ~ but he’s an idiot. A jerk who can’t seem to get it right.

Forget me not: for a pair of best friends, you and Ethan are as close as they come. Practically dating some would say ~ only some don’t know boundaries. And some don’t know how to express their feelings.

Tramposo: when Ethan asked you for a threesome, the last thing you thought you would get was heartbreak.

Enterprise: after taking over her father’s enterprise Y/n is faced with the ever looming factor that she is undeniably a walking target. Rival Mob leader Grayson Dolan might just be her only chance in making her mark in the dangerous city of Fitzroy. 

Extremely wicked & shockingly evil: Y/n finds herself in a situation that causes her to consider she may have had a lapse in judgment when her supposed ‘soulmate’ has a moment of madness while driving. (Discontinued for now)

👻🎃Halloween prompt list🎃👻