Latest Posts by mr-sheridan - Page 2

Water Witch 🌟

No one wants to work anymore. All kids these days want is to physically transform into animals. Bones cracking, breaking, splintering apart, stitching together into exhilaratingly new shapes. Hair, all kinds hair, various fluids and oils and whatnot. Monstrous musk, hideous scents foreign to civilization. Ragged-lip maws dripping with alien teeth, crowning in teething agony like the birth of an infant god. Gore-streaked visages howling in pagan delight by the pale light of the moon, etc. No work ethic. He who makes a beast of himself takes away the pain of clocking in tomorrow

Vivaldi played by the South African elementary school Goede Hoop Marimba Band

Turn ON the sound

ill figure it out <- common utterance of a girl who is completely fucked

This sounds like the kind of story I used to imagine inside of my head as a 6 year old

This is better than any Marvel movie I have ever seen

with the new lore provided ive decided this is the only way this interaction could have gone

Irving Penn Gingko Leaves 1990 Dye-transfer print The Lane Collection

this reddit thread of living your silliest life is so so good

Me: oh yeah, if you think school photography is hard now, try imagining doing this with film.

The new girl: what’s film?

Me: … film. Like… film that goes in a film camera.

New girl: what’s that mean?

Me: … before cameras were digital.

New girl: how did you do it before digital?

Me:… with film? I haven’t had enough coffee for this conversation

Avavav always has the most interesting concepts

Sometimes I think about the quote that goes something like "wise men plant trees who's shade they'll never sit in" and then I think back to all the CEOs and policiticans who are really fucking us over and leaving us in a world we'll have to pick up.

As if they raised us to be any wiser than themselves.

Make Batman wear this with his mask and a tight black dress

CRYING OVER DICK.

“Life is a balance between rest and movement.”

— Osho

Things often get heated when these two play some Capoeira Benguela.

Don't forget that one of the alien kids shrinks humans to keep as pets inside of a wall like an ant farm that develops multiple eras of civilizations and rebellions because of the limited food sources (the kids usually forget to feed them)

love how Solar Opposites started out as a sitcom about two aliens who can't stand each other, stuck with their teenage clones (whom they also can't stand) & a toddler antichrist (whom they view as a sort of self-sufficient free-roaming hamster?) on a stupid planet they can't stand

and 4 seasons later it's a sitcom about a family of genderqueer aliens, headed by a gay couple in a happy & horny open marriage (with a graphic off-screen sex life, despite their canonical lack of genitalia?) teaching themselves to be okay parents to their 3 kids (whose Sci-Fi Antics now slightly-less-frequently revolve around wreaking havoc on human bystanders, and slightly-more-frequently revolve around alien-clone-sibling-bonding*), to the point that the central plot point becomes "We need to provide our toddler antichrist with a stable home environment."

(also the grumpy alien husband is too busy ingratiating his family with their suburban neighbors to even remember whom or what he dislikes. what is this show)

a friend of mine is a science educator. not a classroom teacher - he does the kind of programs you see in museums, fun experiments with lasers and dry ice and shit.

yesterday, a young girl asked him why he was allowed to pour liquid nitrogen all over his own arm but he didn’t want her doing it. I braced myself for some dumb “well I’m an adult so I’m allowed” non-answer, but instead he surprised me by giving some of the best science (and life) advice I think you can give a young person:

“well, it’s one of those rules designed to keep you safe. and following the rules really can help you stay safe, but they’re not perfect. sometimes, usually because they’re too simple, the rules let you do things that aren’t safe, or don’t let you do things that are safe if you know how to do them. one of the reasons I’m good at what I do as a scientist is I try to understand how things work so I can figure out my own rules for keeping myself safe. and sometimes my rules are little more complicated than what I might hear from other people, but they work better for me. like, I let myself play with liquid nitrogen, but only in really specific ways that I’ve spent time practicing. you should follow the rules you’re given at first, but if you take the time to understand how things work, maybe you can make your own, better rules.”

I loved this response. it’s a great encapsulation of two really important things I think people need to learn and re-learn all the time: on the one hand, listen to genuine authority figures; when someone knows more than you about a subject, don’t treat their expertise as “just another opinion” and act like your ignorance is just as good as their knowledge. but on the other hand, don’t obey anything or anyone blindly. recognize that rules and systems and established ideas are never perfect. question things, educate yourself, question things more.

and then, of course, a parent had to butt in and spoil this wonderful lesson by saying:

“but not the rules mom comes up with!”

everyone in the room laughed. except me. I gave her a death glare I’m pretty sure she didn’t notice.

because no. no. your rules are not above reproach if you’re a parent. the thing about the dictates of genuine authority figures - people who deserve to have power, and to have their positions respected - is that they are open to question. genuine authority figures are accountable. governments can be petitioned and protested and recalled. doctors must respect patients’ right to a second opinion. journalists have jobs terminated and credentials revoked if they fail to meet standards of integrity and diligence. scientists, to bring us back full circle, spend their entire careers trying to disprove their own hypotheses! you know who insists on being treated as infallible? megalomaniacal dictators, that’s who. oh, and parents.

I’m beyond sick and tired of this “my house my rules, this family is not a democracy, I want my child to think critically and stand up for themselves except to me ha ha” bullshit. my friend gave this kid the kind of advice that doesn’t just help people become good scientists - if enough people adopt the mentality he put forth to that girl, that’s the kind of advice that helps societies value knowledge and resist totalitarianism. and her mother shut it down because, what, she didn’t want to deal with the inconvenience of having someone question her edicts about whose job it is to wash the dishes on Mondays?

we already know you’re more likely to be a Trump supporter if you’re an authoritarian parent - and that this is a stronger predictor of your views on the current president than age, religiosity, gender, or race. I’ll say this another way in case you didn’t catch the full meaning: people who believe in the absolute, unquestionable authority of parents are more than two and a half times as likely to support Trump as people who don’t, and that’s just among Republicans. we can’t afford to treat the oppressive treatment of children or the injustice of ageist power structures in our society as a sideshow issue any longer. the mentality that parents should be treated by their children as beyond reproach and above dispute is a social cancer that has metastasized into the man currently trying to destroy the foundations of democracy in this country.

in short: parents, get the hell over yourselves before you get us all killed. and kids, learn as much as you can, and then make your own rules.

worst news ever

unpopular opinion but I love it when people write essays for fun on the internet. I don’t think it’s cringe if you’re being polite and coherent and making your own post instead of making unwanted additions to other people’s posts. why say something in a 7 word meme format sentence, faking disaffection and chillness, when you could flesh it out in 7 paragraphs of sincere and substantial nuance. not just for seriousness but for fun concepts, is what i have in mind. for talking about a story or character. for talking about life. talking about anything. this is a wordy person safe zone

Oohh my favourite one recently is this cello artist called Takénobu! He does improv sessions every Tuesday for an hour and he posts his sessions as podcasts on his website. Very steady tempo that's not too calming but slightly restless at a good pace. It's not quite classical tho, on Spotify I think they classify it as contemporary classical.

Youtube: https://youtube.com/channel/UCrguPgSvx7TNvMuNUAScIiA?feature=shared

Improv sessions: https://www.takenobumusic.com/mellow-cello-podcast

It’s literally that simple

Friend: “hey my son can’t concentrate on his homework. He chooses to do literally anything else everytime. He said his head doesn’t feel like it.”

Me: “Did you give him music?”

Friend: “No! No tech until he’s done! He doesn’t need more distracted.”

Me:

“k, bring me the child”

*Go to her house*

*points to the obviously ADHD boy struggling with his homework*

Me: “so your head doesn’t feel like doing homework?”

Son: “yeah. It would rather do ANYTHING else.”

Me: *unwrapping earbuds* here, listen to this for an hour while you do it.

French voice: 1hr later

Son: “k I’m done! :-)”

Friend: “wow, what’d you give him? Concentra, Adderall, Ritalin‽”

Me: “Sweet Dreams by Eurythmics” and some lo-fi.

posts that make me want to rip my heart out part 5

How To Keep Your (Found) Family Happy

A friend posted a cartoon about weaponized incompetence on another website and talked about how every family has this. In fact, most groups of humans have run into this at some point, it's pretty normal for humans to try to find a way to take the easiest route (even if it means more work for others).

Despite all that, I've been with the same person since 2001. We've been married most of that time, had four kids together, and moved countless times as we restarted jobs, hunted promotions, and switched career fields. And we've managed to avoid most of the pitfalls. Here's how my spouse and I have avoid fights, weaponized incompetence, bitter feelings, and feeling neglected in our relationship for over 20 years (Hint: there's a lot of communication going on)... P.S. These are all very family/relationship-centric but you can absolutely adapt them for the workplace, school, or anything else.

MAKING CHOICES AHEAD OF TIME ... the menu is made at the start of the month, money is allocated before major events, we plan trips sometimes years in advance. All of that reduces the choice making later and is one less stress to handle. This is purely a decision making fatigue thing, if you have to make a decision, it requires brain power, and after a long day you'll have none. So why not sit down on a quiet day and make all the decisions you need to make for the next week? Poof! Brain power is freed up and there is less stress!

MONTHLY & WEEKLY CALENDAR SCRUBS... we sit down and make the menu around the first of the month, and we fill in the calendar with schedules so we know which days someone will be too busy to do things like cook, wash up, or something else.

DAILY CHECK-INS... whoever is home together in the morning does a morning devotional (yoga, dance time, scriptures, motivational quote, prayers, whatever works for you) and review what's happening so everyone is tracking major tests, work meetings, stressors, ect. Then we try to have dinner together if possible (even if it means eating at 5) and then a bedtime check-in before light's out (usually scriptures, prayers, and chatting, then bedtime stories for the littles). If people are working from home, we might have lunch together too. That means we have 2-4 planned meetings a day so we can course correct. -> If you're not religious, don't stress it. Pull out some Terry Pratchett quotes, favorite poems, pick a theme song for the week and dance to it. Just give you and your people five minutes to do something happy together. -> If this is at work this might mean a team meeting at the start of the day or a 12 minute check-in at 1:30 when everyone is back from lunch. The goal is to make sure everyone is on schedule for what they need, haven't run into an emergencies, and no one has questions. A supported work team gets more done.

SPENDING LIMITS... we got married in college when we lived off college stipends of $400/m. And we had a kid. Our rule was never to spend $20 without consulting the other person. We never changed that. We discuss everything from birthday presents to grocery lists and when we're getting gas in the cars even though we're much more financially stable. It means everyone spending out of the main accounts is tracking where the money is going so we don't over-splurge.

CHORE SCHEDULES... when we were first married we'd set aside an hour or so to clean the house together. It worked. As the kids got older this got more complicated (they needed to learn how to clean). But now we're at a point where everyone has assigned chores and we put bounties on chores that need to get done and are unassigned. And then we have one cleaning day (usually Friday or Saturday) where we take an hour and all clean the shared spaces. It takes 30-60 minutes to clean the entire house if you have six people working together. Laundry has assigned days for every load. The dishwasher and cooking have assigned days. It works. Everyone helps to the best of their abilities. -> With this is a lot of Adjusted Expectations. My house is not color coordinated with everything in a bin. My family is all neurodivergent. Most our dishes live on the counters because putting them away makes them vanish. This works great for us but might be overwhelming for other people. Who cares? It's our house, we're doing what works for us and the person made about it on Instagram can suck a lemon. -> If you really cannot do chores, cosplay it. Roll the dice and make it a game. Set a timer. Bribe yourself. Make it work for you.

ONE-ON-ONE TIME... not just for me and hubby, but for parents and kids. We try to make sure everyone gets some alone time where they are the focus of attention and we can check-in and make sure their emotional needs are met. Kids need a space to vent. Adults to a space to not be parents. -> This is super important for friendships too. Make time for people in your life! -> At work, this means managers need to make time to talk with their employees, check-in, and assess who needs things (and consider the people's needs first, not the CEO's bonus)

SCHEDULED DOWNTIME... usually this is Sunday for us (the Sabbath day for our religion), but it can be whenever, and we might have more downtime scheduled on a stressful week than in an easy one. The goal here is to make sure everyone gets time to not work, not lead, not think, and just chill. They can play, listen to music, nap, whatever their brain needs, and they can do it without upsetting anyone or feeling guilty because it's part of the schedule. -> In an office this would mean not lean staffing, maybe having an early release day once a week (or a late start) or long lunches. Give your people space to zone out and chill so they can come back refreshed. -> Quiet Quitting only exists because management is trying to exploit their staff. Don't be that boss. (P.S. Join Your Union)

SOME THINGS DON'T HAPPEN... our kids are limited to one after-school activity a year and one AP class for high schoolers. We've tried other ways and found it generates too much stress. I limit projects I take on because I have a set quitting time, even though I work from home. My husband passes up on some away-from-home events with friends because we prioritize family time. Figuring out that balance is something you have to decide as a family. What works for one person won't work for all. -> In business this means doing sustainable, slow growth over rapid booms that overextend and hurt the system. Stop looking for the short term boost when long term is better.

ADAPT TO WHAT YOUR GROUP NEEDS!... this is the most important one, because what we've done over the years has changed in reaction to the needs of people around us. My kids in college need something different than the one starting middle school. My team at the lab needed something than my team at a newspaper. If you have a bunch of introverts, they probably don't want a dance party, they want a three minute meeting with a heads up about any major disturbances and then ten minutes of silence to prepare their souls for any human interaction. Do what works.

I’ve been having a lot of feelings about the downfall of quality lately.

I ordered a pair of Dickies pants because pants are hard and workwear is usually reliable. When they arrived they were the scratchiest, most papery material–I can’t actually call it fabric in good faith–and fit a full three sizes too small. A week later I found the same pair in a thrift store, dated 2017. These are actual pants. They fit, they’re not made of asbestos. They’re only separated by time.

There’s no wood used in interior design unless it’s a custom build. I have a set of wealthy relatives who live in a condo. The downpayment for it was likely more money than I will see in my lifetime. The floors and the cabinets are all still laminate. I know I will never see real wood in a building constructed after 2000. Every “apartment hack” I see online has this very conspicuous, flat appearance because of all the paint and contact paper required to make these builds look personal in any way. The only natural materials are in the furnishings.

I’ve been harping on this for years, but everything is shit, nothing is designed to work, and “growth” and “profit” are just euphemisms for cutting corners until things are unworkable.

I've started to like Tumblr more now that I've forced myself to use it as the sole social media app on my phone.

one (1) messed-up creature

+process

So my sister wants to start sewing more, because

a. She’s 5′ 11″ and can never find pants long enough for her legs or shirts long enough for her arms.

b. She hates synthetic fibers as much as I do and it’s difficult to find natural fiber clothes that aren’t made of cotton

c. She’s a biologist and would physically fistfight microplastics if given half a chance

So her gift from mom and dad for her birthday was a sewing machine. Not a super expensive one but a good solid serviceable one.

And recently she asked “So where do I GET wool or linen and thread that isn’t polyester” and mom was like ‘go ask your sister’

And I, of course, crashed into the group text like “GET A PEN I HAVE WEBSITES FOR U” and honestly I’m thrilled about this

If there was a way to run SUPER MEGA AD BLOCKER on this website I fucking would