hmm? đ±
Pairing : Kyoya Ootori x reader
Word Count : 4k
General rating : Fluff, enemies to love vibes
Summary: As only heir to your family you are bound to an arranged marriage with the third son of the powerful house Ootori. His cold behavior is only a mask for you to uncover when you stumble into music room number three.
You let out a long and bored sigh as you look at a blank paper in front of you. Tamaki assigned you to write ideas for the Halloween event the Host Club wants to host, but your mind was elsewhere. You couldnât stop thinking about that kiss and how eager Kyoya was and then returned to pretending you were just classmates. You were angry and yet⊠You only wanted him to kiss you all over again.Â
It was infuriating. No. He was.Â
âWhat about a cult of vampires thirsty for the blood of their guests.â Tamaki explodes as if he found the best idea of all time. Ew. Blood, no thanks.Â
âThis sounds too erotic even for us.â You chuckle.Â
âWell, you havenât written anything on that paper so Iâm giving you some ideas to make that brain of yours work.â He chuckles while patting the top of your hair.Â
The door busted open with the twins and Haruhi glued to their side. Kaoru spoke up first. âFor the entire week, count us out.â
The mortifying expression on Tamakiâs face made you hold back a laugh. âWhat do you mean âusâ? Why is Haruhi going with you?â
âWe have a tournament on Halloween night, a test of courage.â She mumbles as if she thought it was the dumbest idea, it might as well be.
âAnd she is on our team.â Hikaru snickers. âShe is in our class, afterall.â They both dramatically turn around and leave.
âDoes this mean we cancel our event?â You ask quite eagerly for Tamakiâs response.
âThis means we are going to participate in their little tournament.â His gaze never leaves the trio of second years. You grunt loudly.Â
Tamakiâs genius plan was in preparation while you sat on a bench drinking tea with Mori. Your leg was bouncing rapidly out of anxiety.
âYou seem tense.â Kyoya said, his eyes still focused on his computer screen. âI can smell the tension steaming.â
âEw.â You scoff. âI'm not tense," you retorted.
âWhat's bothering you then? Are you scared?" Tamaki chuckled.
âNo, I just don't see the point in scaring people," you mumbled.
Honey took a seat beside you and flashed a bright smile. âIt's not just about that. You have a lot of candies too!"
âThat's a valid point," you conceded. "While you two brilliant minds work on your plan, I'll make my exit. I've got some personal matters to attend to."
âWhy's that?" Kyoya asked abruptly, turning his gaze towards you.
âIt's not something you need to worry about," you replied with a quick smile before making your way out of the music room. In truth, you weren't busy at all; all your studies and homework were already completed. You simply wished to avoid the Halloween preparations. As you strolled through the school, you sought out an empty music room where you could indulge in a bit of cello before the next class.
After leaving the music room, you headed down the corridor in search of an empty space to practice your cello. As you walked, you couldn't help but overhear snippets of excited chatter from various students discussing the Halloween preparations. It seemed that the Host Club's Halloween event was generating quite a buzz.
Finally, you found an empty and peaceful practice room. You entered and set up your cello, finding comfort in the familiar strains of the instrument. As you began to play, the hauntingly beautiful melody filled the room, creating a serene atmosphere that provided a stark contrast to the bustling excitement of Halloween preparations.
Unbeknownst to you, a familiar figure from the Host Club had been silently trailing you. Haruhi, who had been observing your interactions with the other members, had sensed your need for a break from the chaotic festivities. She had followed you discreetly, understanding that you preferred solitude.
Leaning against the doorframe, Haruhi listened to your enchanting music. The sound of the cello captivated her, and she was moved by the depth of emotion in your playing. She watched you with a soft smile, appreciating the chance to see a different side of you.
When you eventually finished your piece, you turned to find Haruhi standing there, a gentle and understanding look in her eyes. She didn't say anything, but her presence was enough to convey her support and empathy.
âBe ready, Tamaki is taking part in your Tournament.â
She smiles. âThis means you will as well?â
âObviously.â You snort.Â
With that, the two of you spent a little more time chatting, and finding common ground amidst the chaos of the Host Club's Halloween preparations. It was a welcome and unexpected connection that brought a sense of calm to an otherwise hectic day.
On Halloween night
You entered the ball room and noticed the dark ambiance. In the middle you could see makeup and costumes ready to be worn.Â
You sigh. âDid you really ask the occult club to help us?âÂ
âThey are professionals afterall.â Tamaki says proudly. âWho else but the Occult Club to know what is scary or not?â He had a fair point.Â
You were grabbed by two girls and forced to sit down on a chair. You couldnât protest before their work started. They Had their makeup brushes ready with pink and white paint. âItâs too late to say no, right?â You ask anyone before the first stroke of white paint touches your skin. At the same time the other girl worked over your hair. Two pigtails wrapped in red ribbons. It felt like forever until you could see yourself in the mirror. You were going to be a creepy little creepy lolitta doll.
âGood god.â You scoff as you look at yourself with your regular uniform, you look silly.Â
âDo you not like it?â Nekozawa asked in a grim tone. To be fair, you were a bit freaked out by him and so you lied.
âI love it. Iâm just not used to it.â You smile as best as you can, but you look creepy nonetheless.Â
âGood!â He smiles. Even if he was happy, his smile was creepy. âWe got the perfect costume to fit with your marvelous character. âThe cursed doll!â It was like thunder cracked at the same time he spoke those very words.Â
You looked in the mirror and couldn't help but feel that you appeared terrifying â and not in a good way. The worn-out pink and white puffy dress you wore was splattered with fake blood in a chaotic pattern. You imagined your mother would have a heart attack if she saw you in this outfit.
Emerging from the dressing room, you joined your Host Club friends in the ballroom. Tamaki, in his dashing vampire costume, looked unfairly handsome. Mori and Honey, dressed as a pair of werewolves straight out of a telenovela, exuded a certain charm. Kyoya, on the other hand, had chosen not to dress up.
With a stoic expression, you couldn't help but voice your frustration. "I hate you guys."
"Don't you look terrifying?" Kyoya quipped with a barely suppressed laugh.
You glared at him. "And don't you guys look cute?"
"Do you think so?" Honey's smile was radiant.
"Why am I the only one overdressed?" You grumbled.
Tamaki, wrapping an arm over your shoulders, smiled as he explained, "You are the dessert to our coup."
"I don't think that's a saying," you retorted. He led you out of the ballroom and into a classroom tucked away in the far corner of the school.
"Stay here until Honey gives you the signal. Here's your script," Tamaki said, handing you a crumpled piece of paper before closing the door, leaving you alone in the dark room.
"Ugh, I hate them," you muttered to yourself, closing your eyes and reading the poorly written script. It lacked any real scare factor. Your best bet was to simply scream at anyone who entered the room or adopt a lifeless stare to unnerve them.
As you sat in the dark room, dressed in your creepy Lolita costume, time seemed to crawl by at an agonizingly slow pace. The initial excitement of transforming into a terrifying character had given way to boredom and restlessness. Your once-eager anticipation for your role had faded into a growing sense of impatience.
You began to fidget in your chair, the minutes stretching into what felt like hours. The silence in the room was deafening, broken only by the occasional distant laughter and muffled voices from the Halloween event outside. The worn-out pink and white dress seemed to constrict your movements, making you acutely aware of how uncomfortable and itchy it had become.
You sighed deeply, shifting your weight from side to side, trying to ease the discomfort of your costume. Your thoughts wandered, and you began to wonder if you were somehow forgotten or if the Host Club's plan had encountered an unexpected delay. The desire for some action or interaction had grown stronger with each passing minute.
Impulsively, you reached into your pocket and pulled out your phone, checking the time. It had been far longer than you'd expected, and you couldn't help but feel a sense of exasperation. To alleviate your boredom, you began scrolling through your phone, reading messages, and checking social media, all while anxiously waiting for Honey's signal to finally break the monotony of your solitary confinement.
The door creaked open and you looked at who it was not bothering to hide back your phone.Â
âThis is really not your shade.â Kyoya snickers as he enters the room.
âLaugh all you want.â You sigh. He looked at you as if to say âOh, I am.â, âWhat are you doing here?â
âKeeping you from dying of boredom.â He took a seat next to you on the floor.Â
âMy phone was already doing your job.â You chuckle lightly.Â
âYou really donât like Halloween, donât you?â
"Not really, no," you began, reflecting on your past. "When I was a kid, my parents were so busy with their own lives and jobs that they never had time for Halloween, or even Christmas some years. By the time they started to be more present, I just didn't care that much anymore about the holidays."
Kyoya sighed deeply, and you could see his thoughtful expression as he absorbed the glimpse of your personal history.
As the seconds ticked by, you found yourself pondering why you had shared such a personal memory with Kyoya. It wasn't something you typically opened up about, especially not in the midst of a festive occasion like Halloween. Perhaps it was the quiet and the stillness of the room that had encouraged the spontaneous revelation. Or maybe it was Kyoya's ability to make you feel strangely comfortable discussing your past. Regardless of the reason, you couldn't help but wonder why you had chosen to reveal a part of yourself at that moment.
âThen letâs go.â He said as he grabbed your hand to help you out of your creepy chair.
âWhere?âÂ
âIâm going to show you whatâs so fun about it.â
Kyoya led you out of the dimly lit room and into the corridor, your hand still in his firm grip. You followed him through the maze-like hallways of the school, unsure of what to expect.
As you moved stealthily through the school, you couldn't help but have reservations about this endeavor. The idea of scaring people had never really appealed to you, and you had doubts about whether it would be as fun as the others made it out to be. But you trusted Kyoya's judgment, and his air of confidence piqued your curiosity.
The two of you took positions in a dimly lit hallway, concealed behind a corner, waiting for your next victim. Your heart raced as you watched a student approaching, completely unaware of your presence.
In perfect coordination, you and Kyoya executed your plan. As the student drew nearer, you let out a spine-chilling, ghostly wail while Kyoya produced an eerie, spectral light using a concealed flashlight. The student, taken aback and startled, screamed in terror before realizing it was all a prank.
At first, you watched with mixed emotions, uncertain of how the student would react. But as the initial shock and fear gave way to laughter and amusement, you couldn't help but feel a sense of relief and satisfaction. Giggling uncontrollably, you and Kyoya shared in the joy of the moment.
You and Kyoya ventured further into the school, your Lolita doll costume taking on a new persona with each scare. The initial uncertainty you had felt had given way to a sense of exhilaration and a growing enthusiasm for the Halloween shenanigans.
As you reached a more crowded area of the school, you couldn't resist the temptation to continue your mischief. You spotted a group of students engrossed in conversation and laughter, unaware of your presence. Kyoya nodded at you, signaling that this was your next target.
You approached the group with a silent grace, the ruffled layers of your dress swaying as you moved. As you got closer, you unleashed a spine-tingling, ghostly whisper that seemed to echo through the corridor. Simultaneously, Kyoya, hidden in the shadows, conjured a ghostly blue glow that danced eerily around you.
The students, caught off guard by the sudden otherworldly presence, let out a collective gasp and huddled together in fear. A few of them even dropped their belongings in their fright.
You couldn't help but stifle a giggle as you watched their terrified reactions. Some clutched their hearts, while others playfully scolded each other for overreacting. The initial shock gave way to laughter, and you realized that this was the essence of Halloween â a blend of fear and fun.
One of the students, a young girl, turned to you with a mixture of relief and amusement. "That was a good one! You really got us."
You gave a mischievous curtsy, your creepy Lolita persona adding to the theatrics of the moment. "I'm glad you enjoyed it."
As you and Kyoya roamed the dimly lit corridors, you noticed a locked door at the end of a long hallway, illuminated only by the faint light of a flickering overhead bulb. It seemed like the perfect setting for a dramatic and hair-raising Halloween scare.
With a shared nod, you and Kyoya decided to orchestrate a chilling performance. You took your position near the door, hidden in the shadows, your Lolita doll costume transformed into a ghostly and eerie presence.
Kyoya, meanwhile, prepared to unleash his talents. With a quick flourish of his hand, he projected a series of ghostly images on the door, each one more terrifying than the last. The ghostly apparitions danced and flickered, accompanied by spine-tingling whispers that filled the air.
Unsuspecting students rounded the corner and came into view, their footsteps echoing in the eerie silence. As they approached the locked door, they spotted the ghostly figures and heard the haunting whispers. Panic washed over them, and they let out a chorus of terrified screams.
In their panic, the students stumbled over each other, desperately searching for an escape route. Some of them turned and ran back the way they came, while others frantically pounded on the locked door, pleading for it to open. The once-crowded hallway turned into a scene of chaotic terror.
You and Kyoya couldn't help but feel a rush of adrenaline as the students fled in sheer panic, their fear evident in their eyes. It was the ultimate Halloween scare, and you had succeeded beyond your wildest expectations.
As the commotion gradually subsided and the corridor returned to a state of calm, you exchanged an exhilarated glance with Kyoya. The dramatic scare had left a lasting impression, and you both couldn't help but chuckle at the absurdity of it all.
You finally got what made this activity so enjoyable, and you couldn't help but share a knowing smile with Kyoya as you continued to haunt the hallways together.
As your Halloween night of spooking students continued, Kyoya approached you with an excited glint in his eyes. "How about a grand finale?" he suggested, a mischievous smile on his face. Curious and eager to embrace the festive spirit, you nodded in agreement. "What do you have in mind?" Kyoya explained his plan, which involved a grand scare that would target none other than the notorious twins with Haruhi. It was an enticing proposition, and you both set off to make it happen.
You ran around the school to find the trio and once you did they were walking to their next trap, you.
You began to move in a slow, puppet-like manner, as if controlled by unseen strings, your joints bending unnaturally, your movements otherworldly. You swayed with an eerie grace, creating an atmosphere of surreal horror.
At the same time, Kyoya cast an illusion of ghostly whispers and phantom shadows that danced around you. The effect was haunting and mesmerizing, and the corridor seemed to take on a life of its own.
The twins and Haruhi watched, transfixed by the chilling performance. Hikaru and Kaoru exchanged uneasy glances, and Haruhi clutched her heart in mock fear.
As the performance reached its climax, you let out another spine-chilling wail, your voice echoing through the corridor. The twins were quite uneasy with you as for Haruhi, she held back a laugh to not mess up your performance. They werenât moving until you stopped abruptly before sprinting for them, making them run away from you leaving Haruhi alone with you.Â
âToo bad I wasnât convincing enough to scare you.â You laugh with Haruhi.
âI do not scare easily.â She says drying her tears of laughter. Kyoya came out of hiding and applauded you.Â
âI didnât think youâd enjoy yourself that much.â He smiles brightly. A first.
âAll thanks to the brains behind the operation.â You applauded him as well.
Later that night as you were taking out your makeup with Renge and Haruhiâs help, the winners were announced by Nekozawa. You were declared the champion of the Tournament!
Gasps of astonishment filled the room as the Host Club members realized the outcome. Hikaru and Kaoru exchanged surprised glances.
"You weren't even participating!" Kaoru exclaimed.
You smirked, "You guys are just sore losers."
Hikaru chimed in, "You're not even a second-year!"
Kyoya, however, simply leaned against a wall with a wry smile. "All I hear is whining from two losers."
You couldn't help but giggle at the banter among your friends, sharing a victorious moment.
After finally shedding the uncomfortable Lolita costume and wiping away the last remnants of makeup, you found yourself alone in the cozy embrace of the music room. The echoes of the Halloween festivities still resonate in your mind, but the overwhelming discomfort of the costume had been left far behind.
Sitting in the dimly lit room, you reflected on the night, your thoughts filled with gratitude for Kyoya. His unexpected and thrilling proposal to embrace the Halloween spirit had transformed a dull evening into a genuinely enjoyable one. You couldn't help but smile as you remembered how he had dragged you into the world of scares and pranks, and in doing so, had shared a unique and memorable experience with you.
The Halloween night had been a perfect blend of fright and fun, of camaraderie and laughter, and it was all thanks to Kyoya's initiative. As you sat in the peaceful music room, you realized that sometimes, the most unexpected and unconventional plans could lead to the best and most cherished memories.
"All hail the champion," a voice echoed in the empty room, and there stood Kyoya, the unexpected partner in your Halloween scare victory.
You couldn't resist a teasing grin. "Only a bow and some praise will do for your champion."
He walked over, the atmosphere filled with a mix of playful competition and genuine camaraderie. His smile was cocky as he leaned against the side of the column.
"So, do I get a prize for helping you win?" he inquired, his voice tinged with a playful challenge.
You responded with a smug grin, "It's my name they announced, not yours, so I'm afraid you don't get anything."
Kyoya leaned in closer, his smile seeming somewhat wistful. "I did help you win, though. I should get something."
With a soft laugh, you placed a hand on his arm and said, "You get the honor of witnessing your fiancé's majestic victory."
The two of you shared a moment of contentment and affection, the playful banter masking the fondness you felt for each other. It was a celebration of your Halloween success and the unique bond you shared.
âI want something else as my prize.â He smirks.
He acted on his impulses, seizing you by the waist and pressing you firmly against the column. His lips met yours with a passionate intensity, a bruising kiss that left you breathless, and you gasped in surprise at the sudden, fervent connection.
His tongue tantalizing teased your bottom lip, seeking entry, and you willingly granted it. Your heads tilted in unison, and one of his hands found its way to the back of your neck, gently bending it to deepen the kiss. A throaty moan escaped your lips as his other hand on your hip squeezed you possessively.
For a brief moment, he pulled back, his breath hot against your skin, and he whispered with a mixture of desire and frustration, "You always manage to pick the worst timing to drive me so, so eager for you."
His lips trailed a scorching path down your cheek, following the delicate curve of your jawline. Each touch was an electric shock of sensation, sending shivers down your spine as the world around you seemed to blur, consumed by the fervent desire shared in this stolen moment.
âDonât I?â You chuckled briefly. âIt just means Iâm winning.â
âHow so?â He asks not to bother to stop his lips from connecting to your skin.Â
âYou want to hear my master plan?â
âDo enlighten me.â His soft laugh lights a fire inside your stomach.Â
âThe more you resist me, the more you want me⊠Have you noticed how close weâve become in the last few days?â He stops himself in his tracks to look at you in the eyes with intrigue. âI am winning.â
âMust everything be a competition between the two of us?â
âTo get what we both deeply want, it is not an option.â
âAnd what is it I want?â He smirks as if he could read you all too well.Â
âYou donât want to marry me for love and some other reason you refuse to talk about and I donât want to get married at all, but duty is duty. But you do want me, which makes things complicated for us.â You breathe heavily when his teeth graze the skin of your neck. âSo letâs meet in the middle. We can either keep denying each otherâs needs and go our separate ways to college hoping to find better matches for us so we both marry for love, duty and what not, or we can give in and have our fun until college and then we find better matches. So you donât have to marry me and youâll be out of my hair. Two simple choices, one clearly more fun than the other, but riskier.â
He chuckles when he faces you again. âHow so?â
âYouâll fall in love.â No, you would.
âWith you?â He chuckles. âYouâre pretty to look at, sure, but you get on my nerves too much for me to fall in love.âÂ
âI gave you our options, itâs your choice. In a way I am not replacing you like you asked.â He crashed his lips to yours, his very own way to seal their deal.
âI wonât lose to you, y/n.â He whispered before his lips met yours once more.Â
âNeither will I.â You moan against his lips before you were picked up and carried on one of the pink velvet couches. He pried your pants off gently as his lips were still glued to yours. It was happening⊠Youâd finally have Kyoya the way you wanted him ever since last time he kissed you.Â
He moved between your thighs and took his sweet time to kiss and nimble on both of them.Â
âYou always assume I have better self control than I actually do.â He whispers before taking your underwear off. âIâm no better than any other man when it comes to you.â He smirks before dipping his head between your thighs. You huffed out a loud moan when he licked a stripe up your folds, before plunging his tongue right into your dripping heat. You snatched at his head, pulling his hair as your hips shifted against himâ his nose nudging your clit.
He moaned against your cuntâ the vibrations making that coil in your stomach tighten. He squeezed your thighs, running his tongue up your folds and swirling it around your clit, repeating this action a few times. You felt like you were in a dream, Kyoya pleasing you as a reward for your victory... or for his own pleasure. It didn't matter, he had accepted your deal and you were more than happy to give in to the tension between the two of you.
You felt yourself drawing tight, a thin sheen of sweat gathering across your bare skin. âKyoyaââ You came with a moan of his name, your hips stuttering against his face. You felt him groan beneath you, tongue working you through your orgasm.
After a long moment, Kyoya hovered over you. You smiled hazily at him. He hummed, pressing his mouth to yours. You couldn't believe what had just happened.
You could taste yourself on his lips, his tongue. You hummed a response, too busy stroking his cheek, feeling your own arousal sticky on your fingers. He pulled back briefly. âI wonât lose to you.â He repeated like it was an oath and you believed him for a split second.
blurb inumaki made it a mission to figure out why youâre acting so strange around him. he considered everything except a crush. (a 3+1 fic)
# fluff, based off twice song, friends to lovers, wc 2k
the first time starts with accidental hand holding.
in all honesty, maybe you shouldâve figured you would slip sooner than later. a harmless crushânow harmful given the situation with your peers, mostly named gojo satoru and pandaâis impossible to hide when the first thing on your mind isnât romance, but bloody murder.
it was a day that was not dissimilar to a vacation.Â
unfortunately, students like you arenât quite the type to be given day-offs like 20% off coupons in sunday newspapers. so when gojo-sensei said âbe free, my flock! make your mama bird proud!!â like the fucking weirdo he is, all of you shouldâve known that curses would be crawling everywhere in your given âvacationâ destination.
âif you drop one bag, iâll kill you,â says nobara. âand donât you dare drop maki-senpaiâs bag or iâll kill you again!â
maki shrugs at your confused look, though she looks amused. she always allows nobara to suck up to her, but everyone else is as good as gone if they try.
yuuji, local maid of the first years and now the second years, sighs. âyes, maâam, i understand.â
you walk in a leisurely pace beside nobara and inumaki. itâs both heaven and hell, and not in the way anyone would think. hell, because the love of your life is literally right beside you and looks so content you want to pinch him. heaven, because your best friend is right there to calm you down.
panda and yuuji launch into an insightful debate about which restaurant should you all go to for dinner, and everyone else joins in the conversation, save for you and inumaki, who are happy to listen to them.
âwhat do you think, y/n?â yuuji asks.
âhmm,â you pretend to be deep in thought, âfushiguro-kun has good taste so i vote whatever he votes.â
megumi flushes red. inumaki makes a noise to say that he agrees with you.
they continue with their debate. youâre happy to eat wherever as long as you stay with your friends.
your hand brushes against something warm and soft; on instinct, you want to curl into it like a cat, but when you look down and realize who those hands belong to, you panic.
âoh my god thatâs inumaki-senpaiâs handâ
with a flinch thatâs strong enough to make nobara jostle from beside you, you dart away from inumaki.
nobara splutters, ready to have your head chopped off for disturbing personal space, but abruptly stops at the sight of your round-eyed stare directed at your own hands. it takes one glance at the object of your affection to realize whatâs going on.
inumaki blinks, startled and confused. âmustard leaf?â he asks you, looking around for any sign of danger.
unless you all happen to walk past a mirror shop, you doubt heâd find anything life-threatening.
âwhat? what happened?â yuuji looks extremely alarmed at the sight of your distressed face. ây/nâŠ?â
ânothing!â youâre quick to exclaim before everyone else asks. âsorry, just, uhhhââ panicked because i almost held inumakiâs hand like it was second nature.
you rush to yuujiâs side and distract him with a half-baked excuse, away from an amused nobara and a confused inumaki. if anyone notices you pointedly steering clear from inumaki, they donât say anything.
you sit next to yuuji and fushiguro, despite inumaki leaving space for you.
it goes mostly normal for the rest of the night.
meanwhile, inumaki looks deeply perplexed at everyone acting like thereâs an inside joke heâs not getting.
âinumaki? whatâs up?â
maki quirks an eyebrow when inumaki slips a paper for her and panda to see. they read the words slowly, understanding dawning on their faces.
did i do something to upset y/n?, the note reads.
panda looks like heâs about to shit himself with how happy he looks. not an appropriate response, inumaki thinks, a little upset. âno, you didnât do anything to upset y/n!â he says gleefully, which is like, totally suspicious.
âyouâre so dumb,â maki rolls her eyes, flicking the paper back to him. it lands on his head, and she pats it. âyouâll figure it out soon.â
inumaki wants to figure it out now. he doesnât like that youâre avoiding him, and he makes it clear with a mildly aggressive: âbonito flakes.â
maki and panda only laugh.
he makes it a mission to figure it out, much to your chagrin.
the second time starts, unfortunately, with gojo-sensei. and this time. inumaki is acutely aware, unfortunately.
âmy lovebirds!â gojo chirps with a happy clap. you grimace and inumaki makes a confused noise. âmy wonder duo! are you both up for some high-ranking missions, hm?â
âsensei, inumaki-senpai just got off from one,â you tell him.
inumaki shakes his head at you. âbonito flakes.â
gojo hums with amusement. âhmm? you want to do it?â and at your deadpan glare, gojo grins, because heâs a maniac who knows about your silly high school crush. âhe wants to do it! if y/n-chan only wants his say in it, then weâre good to go.â
gojo may act like a foolâand he is, honestlyâbut heâs right about one thing, and itâs how you and inumaki fall into unspoken ease with teamwork, one thatâs strangely limited to the both of you.
halves of the same whole, nanami once said. you didnât have the heart to tell him itâs because you are in love with your supposed other half.
you assure gojo that itâs only because inumaki is strong enough to protect both him and his teammate, and gojo calls bullshit and says no matter what your technique is, you and inumaki make a formidable pair despite the year difference.
the thought of that makes you a little happy. and gojo takes advantage of that by sending you both off to missions more than anyone else.
but you donât mind, not really. not when you get to spend time with inumaki, whoâs so easy to be around with.
inumaki seems pleased that the Vacation-Day-Incident is long forgotten and you two fall back into a friendly routine.
âinumaki-senpai, here.â you toss him a small bottle of cough syrup you like to carry around in case of emergencies.
he looks surprised at the sight of it. âtuna mayo?â
âah, yeah,â you chuckle sheepishly. âi notice you run out sometimes when it gets too rough so i always have extras with me.â
inumaki has a funny expression on his face, and itâs one he makes when heâs frustrated he canât say what he wants to.
you clear your throat. âyou donât have to thank me, itâs no troubleâoh, what are youââ
inumaki shuts you up by taking your hand and gently kissing your knuckles.
you make a noise thatâs somewhere between a yelp and a strangled squeal, which he seems to find amusing.
you know he did that to show gratitude when he canât express it verbally, but did he have to do it like ThatâŠ?
you feel your face heat up and you pull away from him like youâve been burnt, missing the displeased frown on his face. âum! gojo-sensei is probably waiting for us.â
inumakiâs gaze is intense. âmustard leaf?â
inumaki feels like youâre pushing him away again. maybe youâre uncomfortable around him? that seems most likely. no one else had flinched from his presence that way before.
inumaki feels a bit sad, now. heâs not sulkingâmaybeâbut gojo pats him on the back and wishes him luck and to push through with his mission. (inumaki never told anyone about it, but itâs gojo-sensei and he knows everything so he accepts it with a nod of gratitude.)
all in all, it was a very unfortunate end to the day.
the third time it happens, youâre stuck in a forest with him.
itâs a mission involving all of the first years along with inumaki (he found you guys on his way back) this time, and still, you end up alone with inumaki. itâs like the universe is conspiring against you or something.
or maybe itâs nobara not-so-subtly pushing you to inumakiâs direction every five minutes.
you donât mind.
âyuuji-kun sure attracts trouble like a magnet, hm?â you muse, jumping over a root tall enough to reach your thigh.
inumaki smiles. âsalmon.â
âi canât help but worry, though,â you sigh. inumaki nudges you with an elbow until you look at his silent expression. âyeah, yeah, yuuji-kun is strong. and nobara and fushiguro-kun are strong enough to protect him, but itâs soâbleurgh.â
inumaki seems to accept your explanation. âtuna.â
you check the weather. âdâyou think we should hurry upââ
âexplode!â
that was not your voice.
alarmed, you turn your gaze back straight ahead. you almost trip over your own feet at the sight of a deformed caterpillar-like sludge creature that crawls out from the trees, similar to the one inumaki just killed.
the curse claws at your face.
you recoil from its grasp. âoh, gross!â you pierce your sword through it and watch it fizzle out of existence, flailing limply in your blade. you twist it around just to make sure. âthat was gross,â you repeat.
âmustard leaf?â without warning, inumaki takes hold of your chinâNNHHHGG????!âfor his eyes to roam around your face to check for any scratches.
you love that heâs getting comfortable with you, you really do. best friends forever, or something like that. but that doesnât mean you donât get to freak out about it when you quite literally feel his breath on your face.
you sputter some excuse and hurry away from him, heart pounding.
inumaki goes still, eyes stuck on the spot you were standing on before you ran away.
the frantic looks directed to anywhere but him, the embarrassed noises, the stammeringâ
maybe youâre already in a relationship?
heâs not sure what to feel about this mission anymore.
inumaki toge is standing outside your room.
yuuji spots him as heâs on his way back to his, and waves. âinumaki-senpai? what are you doing here?â
inumaki waves back and points at your door. âtuna tuna.â
âoooh, weâre at that part, alright,â says yuuji like that it isnât the most cryptic dialogue one has ever heard. âdo you want me to check if y/nâs there?â
âkatsuobushi.â
âokay, okay! donât look at me like that.â yuuji laughs. âiâll leave ya to it. good luck, senpai!â
âmustard leafâŠâ
inumaki shakes his head and knocks on your door.
thereâs a confused snort from the other side. you probably just woke up, inumaki thinks to himself with a small smile, and it doesnât fade when you open the door, disheveled.
your eyes widen. âi-inumaki-senpai?â you blurt out louder than intended. both of you can hear a poorly stifled cackle from nobaraâs room.
inumaki holds out his phone, letting you read out the words pre-written on the screen: i came here to apologize.
âwhat? wait, waitâ what? what happened?â
inumaki types on his phone for a few seconds. i made you uncomfortable the past few days. i didnât mean to do that.
you stare at him, blinking slowly. âmade me⊠uncomfortable⊠whatâŠ?â thenâ âoh. oh! oh no, no, no. no, ahh this is so embarrassing.â
âmustard leafâŠ?â inumaki instinctively reaches out to you, but then stops himself when he remembers what heâs here for in the first place.
âinumaki,â you laugh in disbelief, âwhy are you apologizing as if itâs your fault i have a crush on you?â
what?
he gapesâheâs sure heâs gaping, but he canât help it. his jaw drops even more when you donât take it back, or even announce that youâre joking. youâre not joking. with a finger scratching the nape of your neck, you smile sheepishly. âi thought i was being obvious, but maybe notâŠ?â
inumaki canât help but mutter a soft, âohâ of realization.
it turns out heâs got it all wrong.
âoh,â says inumaki again.
he curses, and then shoves his phone away to take your hands. âsalmon!â he exclaims, and he sounds so relieved and happy and youâre looking like you want to run away again. âsalmon.â
âiâm sorry, iâm not sure what you meanââ
inumaki huffs and pulls his collar down. heâll just show you.
it ends with a kiss.
remember when i said when i write jjk fics it would only be for inumaki? yeah well. TA DAAAAA ( ÂŽ âż ` ) you should be worried tbh bc i literally have no idea wtf im doing with these characters
( a/n ) when i came back the poll was 50/50 so i got bribed and itâs now decided that rin is the winner + little highschool au bc we all know they dropped out:/ idk what to title this im ngl
thereâs a cat on the sidewalk.
you have about six dollars in your hand, a faltering mission to treat yourself to a cold drink, and an aching heart at the sight of the little animal seated like a king on concrete, looking up at you with blank eyes.
its dark fur and near-teal eyes remind you of someone. of a back facing your seat, dark hair always kept neat and looking like itâs conditioned meticulously, and the sharpest eyes you have ever seen on a high schooler.
it has been a long day, long enough for you to have stormed out of the room as soon as classes ended to rush to the nearest shop that would sell what youâre craving. alas, there is a cat on the sidewalk, and you canât just ignore it.
âstay here, kitty,â you say before rushing off with the six dollars in hand and a new goal to head straight to the nearest sign with an animal cardboard cutout printed on it.
eventually, you find one; eventually, you come out of the store holding cat food and a tiny cat bowl because you were worried about letting the cat eat straight from the can. itâs baby blue with little fishes added as design, though you think itâs rather gruesome to put that there, considering the canned food you bought is made from fish. still, you hope the cat will appreciate it.
the cat is still there as if itâs understood and blessed you with patience. the unimpressed look it has on its face says otherwise, though. grateful, you kneel beside it, slightly mesmerized by the fact that it hasnât run away yet.
maybe other people are feeding it, too? it doesnât look worryingly thin. needs a little cleaning, but looks well-fed. youâre relieved.
âhere you go,â you coo, ignoring the strange looks of the passersby. you place the bowl down and crack open the can. the smell has the cat walking over, meowing all crankily. âi know, i know.â
the cat doesnât dig in until youâve finished shaking off its contents, staring at you in the same way the itoshi guy in your class would. the resemblance is uncanny.
you spend the rest of your afternoon keeping the cat company. its face speaks as if itâs far from amused, but the way it rubs against your ankle contradicts it.
cute. the cat is cute.
another student comes to visit the cat, carrying two cans of cat food. itâs been sitting in the plastic for a little while because as he had been going in the same routine he usually has, he spots you, his classmate, bent to the knees next to his cat, and paused.
rin thinks youâre scared of him because everyone in the class is. he lets you have your moment, choosing to come back later when youâve finished so you donât freak out and scare the cat. he thinks he can strike up a conversation tomorrow where there are no cats to frighten.
the cat walks up to him, instantly familiar. he doesnât even meow up at rin impatiently, which confirms rinâs suspicions.
ây/n fed you well,â he mumbles. âi guess you can have this tomorrow.â
youâre suddenly all too aware that rin sits in front of you. heâs right there, uniform stretched over his broad back, most likely because heâs the prodigy of soccer in your school.
the neatness of his hair reminds you of the cat from yesterday, with its silky dark fur despite being a stray. you resist the urge to touch it, missing the cat already. you make a mental note to refill your water bottle so the cat can drink after.
while left thinking about the fact that youâre three dollars shorter than yesterday's budget, you fail to notice that class has ended and rin has his arm slung over the top of his chair to turn to look at you.
rinâs eyes flicker down to the paper bag next to your feet. âwhatâs that for?â
startled by the smoothness of his voice directed at you, you choke out a: ât-this?â you gesture lamely at the bag containing the gruesome bowl.
âwhat else am i referring to?â
you scrunch your nose. âokay, no need to be so rude. maybe i wonât tell you what it is.â
rin stares, and youâre intensely reminded of piercing eyes looking up at you, patiently waiting for the canned tuna.
âitâs a cat bowl,â you murmur, defeated.
âcat bowl,â he repeats, a gleam in his eye. he probably thinks youâre weirder than he already thinks you are.
âfor a stray. i donât want to bring it around because some other cat owner might steal it. i canât have that.â
âshow me,â he demands.
a little terrified by the fact that the class grump is actively maintaining a conversation with you; you obediently show him the bowl, spinning it around to show all sides. rin hums, contemplative. your classmates are starting to stare. âitâs weird, right? fishes for the print and fishes for dinner. do you like it?â
âlukewarm.â
âwhat does that even mean?â
âitâs too small. buy a new one.â
â...you think?â
rin nods, standing up. the chair screeches while he says, âiâll come with you.â
this is how you end up in the same pet supply store with a companion this time. rin picks the most expensive one for the bowl and the canned cat food, which makes you think he must really like cats a lot.
but as you two leave the store, you belatedly realize heâs leading the way even though you never told him anything about the stray you meet.
it doesnât hit you until the same cat meows and purrs at rin, rubbing against his pants with its entire body.
âhi,â rin says, his voice uncharacteristically soft.
you gape. âwait, the catâs yours?â
rin bends down, knees to his chest while he sets the bowl down and cracks the can open with one finger. âno. dadâs allergic. he doesnât follow me back home anyway.â while he does that, the cat comes to greet you, and your heart aches on rinâs behalf.
so he just comes to feed him every day, huh⊠you muse, gently scratching the cat who purrs at your attention but still looks as if heâd rather be anywhere but here.
âdo you have a name for him?â
rin pauses, having finished pouring everything. â...no.â he squints at you as if youâve just asked him the exact coordinates of his birthplace: sincerely confused.
âwhat do you call him, then?â you watch as the unnamed cat starts digging down on the food, content. you wonder why no one else has already kept this cat to themselves. heâs so cute and polite.
âcat.â
âah, of course.â
you two watch âcatâ eat, content with the silence. it starts to drizzle moments later, but rin is quick to pull out an umbrella and cover all three of you. the cat grumbles unhappily at the splatter of rain hitting him.
âdo you always visit him?â
âyes.â
âdo you like cats?â
âyes.â
a shame that allergies are the only thing keeping itoshi rin from getting a cat.
while youâre distracted, the cat goes back to rin. rin wastes no time bending down to pick him up, looking awfully domestic in the middle of a sidewalk in front of a busy coffee shop. your hands twitch to reach for your phone, but youâre too stunned to do anything but stare. they look so much alike.
cute, you think, horrified, rin looks so cute holding the cat.
while engulfed in rinâs arms, the cat meows at you. and you, with a too-tender heart, canât resist.
âiâll keep him,â you declare with newfound determination. âiâll take care of him. if you let me keep the bowl you bought.â
rinâs eyes light up, though it wouldnât have been evident if you hadnât been his classmate and witnessed his varying expressions of death. (as if it was varying in the first place.)
âiâll buy everything else heâll like,â he says, like a true cat mom, his face glowing with barely concealed excitement.
since then, rin accompanies you home. you tell him that youâve saved up three dollars from yesterday and now you have more than enough to buy a nice, cold drink and maybe catnip for the cat, but rin insists that heâll pay for everything, including your beverage.
âyou feed our son.â
âour son?â he repeats curiously.
âyes. he lives with me. he looks like you,â you explain absentmindedly, setting up the water dispenser on the new food bowl rin ended up buying. it no longer has fish for design or the painful lime green he bought the second timeâinstead, itâs a nice blue that compliments the catâs eyes.
âand what are you implying is going on between us?â
you nearly spill water all over the floor. âiâŠâ you honestly did not think about that, âânevermind. donât make it weird, itoshi!â
you think you heard rin chuckling, but youâre too busy being embarrassed to bother.
(during class, you will find that rin is far from intimidating. in fact, heâs actually a little bitch to deal with. youâre starting to think that heâs more of a pain to deal with than an actual grumpy cat.
âdonât forget to buy food for our son,â rin says after class, in front of students who gossip like there is no tomorrow.
âwhat?â
âfor our son,â rin says, nonplussed at the sight of your haunted expression.
someone who has overheard the conversation pipes up, âyou two have a son?â
âwe donât!â you hiss, face burning with embarrassment at the sudden influx of attention from your classmates.
rin frowns. âdonât lie.â
âyou two are starting to act like a married couple recentlyâŠâ another comments offhandedly.
âitoshi walks y/n home, i saw!â
âwe have a son,â rin agrees, and youâre starting to think that heâs doing it on purpose.
âstop saying that!â)
thank u art aanobrain for giving me the idea of rin just naming the cat âcatâ. that idea is so special to me.
anyway. RIN IS SO HARD TO WRITE HELPPPP. this was an excruciating process i genuinely did not know if i did anything right but WHATâS DONE IS DONE. thx for reading <3
If the sky is pink and white đ€Ł.đ„§.đĄŒ.â đ€Ł.đ„§.đĄŒ.â đ€Ł.đ„§. đ€Ł.đ„§.đĄŒ.â đ€Ł.
đ€Ł.đ„§.đĄŒ.â đ€Ł.đ„§.đĄŒ.â đ€Ł.đ„§.đĄŒ If the ground is black and yellow
â± â STUDYING WITH ALBEDO â NSFW
+. NOTES â this is a slightly longer than anticipated drabble about your perverted classmate albedo whoâs top of his class. heâs been eyeing you for some time and unnoticed by him, you might share those same feelings for himâŠ!
+. WARNINGS â nsfw + mdni + blowjob + virgin bedo + college au + voyerism + exhibitionism + slight hair pulling + shy!virigin!bedo x dominate!experienced!reader !
albedo had a similar routine of study sessions he held for those who asked for help from him. it was few, but in those times, he enjoyed it. often being so quiet and kept to himself, getting to not only talk to others but it being about something he really enjoys? it brings out the absolute best in him! thatâs not to say when he found out you wanted to have a study session with him, he practically stuttered over his words and face turned red. having such a cute girl like you wanting to spend time with him was making albedo hot in the face. even if it was just studying. you seemed so sweet, gentle even with a calming energy that matched his own. even then, albedo has little to no experience talking with girls. he often found his eyes wandering and heart pumping so fast he couldnât hear anything except it. how pathetic he was, overthinking every little detail even though all you probably wanted was some quick studying in.
âalbedo?â
you said a little louder to get his attention. heâs been spacing out for some time now and it was starting to worry you. his eyes finally darting everywhere as he regains his focus.
âi-iâm umââ
he stutters over his words which you found adorable.
trying your best to hold back a smirk as you give him a small smile.
âmy apologies, start over again with what you were sayingâ.
so sweet of him.
though, it was a good cover up for how he really was. youâd follow where his pretty blue eyes wandered and sometimes could even make out a faint outline of his bulge in his pants. how cute. he could barley keep it together around you. you started over from where you were as albedo continued your study session. he was surprisingly a good instructor when he got into topics he enjoyed. his otherwise quiet and cold demeanor was soon pushed away. but before you could get too distracted, you asked him a question while he began to pack things up.
âwhy not let me treat you! itâs well deserved after allâ
albedo scratched the side of his face in thought. he didnât know the next time heâd have a chance like this but what if you werenât even into him at all? he mentally sighed as he knew he shouldnât even be thinking of asking you of anything. if anything, you probably just felt bad for him right?
âthereâs no need please, im more than happy just to help you with class workâ
you sighed a little at his response but also wanted to smile at how respectful he came off.
âhow aboutâŠi help you out with something else?â
âsomething else?â
âsomeoneâs gonna see, someoneâs gonna- ah-!â
albedo covered his mouth as quickly as he let that pathetic whine out. taking a good look around to make sure no one else was there to witness what was going down. how could you get both of you in such a risky situation? you only continued on your reward for albedo as you tugged at his waist band. he pushed up his glasses up as he tried to regain some control of the situation. your pretty hands teasing their way along albedos rather warm skin. his eyes shut at your touch, being so nervous and going solely based off his bodies reactions.
it felt so foreign yet so heavenly for albedo it was hard to contain any sort of composure. finally pulling down his pants enough to release him, he felt the cold air touch his hot to the touch skin. seething slightly at the feeling, albedo lowly groaned, a hand soon coming to cover his mouth and avoid any unwanted attention or getting caught. letting his cock release from the constriction of his pants as his aching hard cock bobbed under its own weight. from someone of albedos stature, it was a pretty impressive size. such a pretty color and shape too. the soft outline of his v-line tempted you go hard to continue teasing but thought it best to get down to it straight away to save him the build up.
always having a feeling these kinda boys were hiding something. the thickness made you drool at the thought of how nice he would feel stretching you out, but that would have to be saved for another time <3. this only urging yourself to wrap your fingers around him and gently pump his aching cock up and down in rhythmic motions. you looked up to albedo, watching his pretty features become distorted with this overwhelming pleasure.
âf-fuck that feels goodâ
he couldnât even hold back his own thoughts anymore. best part was, you hadnât even gotten to the actual reward.
âyou canât deny me now can you bedo?â you teasingly joked with him as he shifted his hips in his seat to look more natural.
âhah..i guess..â
you giggled at his attempt to keep a cool face and quiet voice even though his heart was racing. as you continued stroking him, youâd watched him become more relaxed, taking this as a sign to move on. you moved your face closer to his swelled tip before looking up to him once more. feeling your breath on his skin was such a heavenly feeling in itself. still keeping that eye contact, you began to give his neglected tip gentle licks and kisses. as you did so you pulled back for a moment to ask albedo a question.
âhave you ever gotten a blowjob albedo?â already knowing the answer but still wanting to hear what he had to say.
ân-no..â
you could tell he was embarrassed and you loved hearing that in his voice. smiling, you let your spit begin to drip down one of his many thick, pulsing veins as you once again stroked his now slicked cock. the lewd sounds of albedos cock being pumped while you continued to kiss and lick his tip were already getting you needy.
âguess iâll be your first then hm?â albedos cheeks where flushed along with his mouth being slightly parted. he looked so pretty all messy for you. he nodded awkwardly but that didnât last for long as you soon took albedo inside your tight, hot mouth. albedos back practically arched at the feeling. as his hand, out of some sort of instinct, made its way to your hair. you looked up to him while stilling him inside your mouth. heâs so fucking cute you canât wait to show him what else you can make him feel. starting to bob your head gently up and down albedo still had to get used to the feeling of your mouth.
heâd seen this in porn heâs watched many times before but never would he have imagined it feeling so damn good. his pretty blue eyes becoming half lidded because of the immense pleasure. focusing on your mouth, you moved your hands up to rest of his thigh.
taking glances up to see if albedo was enjoying his first ever blowjob and yet, you could tell he was still so stressed and worried about getting caught. even while knowing there was no one else in the library at that time. squeezing at his thigh and rubbing your thumb into the soft flesh to help him relax and soothe his beating heart. he did appreciate it even while he couldnât help his body.
âi-iâm so sorry i meant to warn you but-â
albedo cut himself off short when he saw you swallow his cum and lick your lips after. being so in awe of how sensual you were, his pretty class mate licking up his cum in the library after a study session sounded nothing more than a dream after all. putting your hands on his thighs again, you gave him a small smile.
ânothing to be sorry about bedo, you taste nice anywayâ
his face was distorted with some sort of rather shocked yet pleased feeling. he pushed up his glasses awkwardly but so cutely after receiving something youâre sure will cloud his mind for weeks. so in awe of how nice you were towards someone like him.
âletâs do this again sometime bedo, next time we can take it to my dormâ
âmay i askâ why did you do this for me?â
you smiled gently at his question.
âto thank you for helping me out, itâs only fair right?â
albedo thought about your response momentarily before you leaned in closer to his body.
âalso, because i think youâre cute sillyâ
leaving a small kiss on his thigh, he tensed up but never once denied you of anything. having albedo wrapped around your finger was such an easy task that had been earned <3.
albedo was still twitching slightly from his orgasm, especially his sensitive little thighs, so you took his silence as a compliment. who knew treating that cute, nerdy boy would be such a reward.
âsee you next study session yeah?â
Word count: 14.7k
Warnings: smut
Summary: you smile foolishly, the smile of a loser in love
Nagito Komaeda doesn't like himself.
He feels he's established it a lot with his class already. There was little to question when the island only had 16 students and two of them were already dead. Though, he supposes that it isn't that much. He wonders who's going to feed him. He scared Mahiru out, after all. Maybe Mahiru would die from the second motive! That would surely bring his class hope, would it not? He shifts uncomfortably on the wood, trying to get on his back. How pathetic of him.
Little light spills through the room. He had forgotten to ask Mahiru to turn the lights on before she left. He gives up halfway, staring up at the ceiling instead. Would you visit him? His precious little lover? Maybe you would. Who knows. You seemed pretty fine when he had gone insane during the first trial. Maybe you'd leave him for another ultimate. Maybe Hajime? Who knows. Trash like him doesn't deserve to hang on to you anyways. You're such a symbol of hope, yet you were dirtying yourself with him.
The door to the room opens, and the light turns on. He hears you cough twice.
"Did you come to visit trash like me?"
You ignore his words.
Ah. You're mad.
Komaeda holds his breath as you step in front of him, staring down at him. You crouch to his level, buttering the toast, crossing your legs, holding the bread to his lips.
"Angel, are you ma-"
You shove the food in his mouth, forcing him to chew. You stare blankly at him as he does, and he swallows. You press the cup of water to his lips, being kind enough to give him a straw. Komaeda drinks without speaking, understanding that you wanted some sort of quiet. He finishes the rest of the food with your help, staring at you blankly once the tray is finished.
"I'm sorry." The word feels dry on his lips, and he keeps his head hung.
You stare at him for what seems like forever before you stand up with the tray. "I'll be back for lunch."
Komaeda watches the door to the room close, but the light remains.
How kind of you.
You come back during lunch as promised; this time, the atmosphere much gentler.
"Open up," You blow on the rice and meat, holding it to Komaeda's lips. He chews, sitting up this time, his stomach in less pain. He was bony all over, now that he thought about it. You stare at the way his skin sticks to his ribs, and you get another spoonful of rice.
The two of you sit there, Komaeda eating silently, and you lost in thought. You finish the bowl, no rice left behind, and you help the straw to Komaeda's lips. He finishes the juice and pauses.
"Do... you have the key?"
"Give it a moment." You wait for the body announcement to be made, and Komaeda watches as you have Monomi untie him. You follow behind him as he rushes to the bathroom first.
You're still not talking to him.
You wait outside the door as he finishes, and he takes your hand as you reach out to him. You step to the game, and you play. Komaeda instructs you from behind, and the two of you finish. You stare at the prize. Between the killing and executions, Komaeda wonders if you even like him all that much. You hand him the image, and you stare at him. Ah, you want him to talk.
"Well," Komaeda smiles. "I know who the killer is."
"I know you do." You stare at the picture in your hands.
Komaeda thinks you've been strange. Ever since meeting him in middle school, the only thing you had obsessed over was what year it was and what would happen. You had gone to the point of obsessing it to the point of madness, Komaeda thinks. The only thing you had ever talked about when you woke up on the island was who was going to reveal what and what was going to happen to who. You had accurately predicted the death of Twogami, revealing Teruteru as the killer, yet Komaeda had gone mad anyways. You had told him to stay sane during the trip. It wouldn't be the first time someone's been frustrated with him.
Komaeda feels something familiar for you.
You stare at the photo with such a strong sense of nostalgia that it seems hard to believe that it could be anything else. Nagito Komaeda knew something that you did as well. Maybe that was why you picked him. He had the fastest brain that even Hinata couldn't use. Maybe he was meant to be a pretty tool to display in your arsenal that you would never touch. You never let him touch you first, and you never let him do anything without consulting you first. It was as if you had to control what he did.
Yet, he doesn't find it in himself to question you.
He had spent a year in Hope's Peak with you. What did you mean he was eighteen? It was already messed up from the start to you, maybe. Komaeda had watched you panic and only calm down when the future seemed to play out how you predicted it would. You were terribly anxious, chewing on your lips and biting your nails. Komaeda wonders if you had just dated him in order to have a caretaker. Komaeda supposes he spoils you rotten. Well, nothing wrong with spoiling an ultimate.
"What's wrong?" He stares at you as you stare at the sun.
"I miss my home."
Right. There was that too. You had always mumbled quietly when you were fazed out, silently praying for something to kill you. Komaeda didn't understand why you wanted to die so desperately. You were an ultimate, and you had everything you had seemed to want, yet you always talked about home. You missed... your home. It was strange to think that the only constant in his life was desperate to leave him. Maybe he was just destined to be alone.
You had stuck next to him even as Hinata was passed out, and you had rocked on your feet anxiously as he had met the other students, memorizing voice lines and counting fingers. You seemed to hate when you were unfamiliar with things. Komaeda held a hand over yours when you ran out of fingers, helping you keep count of whatever it was you were counting. When you counted to sixteen, you had stopped. You had looked at Komaeda, lips pulled into a frown. "Complete."
Komaeda's handbook had struck a chord when you finished meeting everyone and told him it was complete. His memory of you wasn't like that the more he thinks about it. You had always tried staying positive in the past, even when you seemingly appeared out of nowhere in the middle of the street, head spinning. You didn't know what he was saying. You didn't understand him. You were just a foreigner lost in the streets of Tokyo, and Komaeda had been kind enough to take you in. There was nothing more to it, and there was nothing less.
It's strange to think that you were now fluent in Japanese after only a handful of lessons from Komaeda.
When Komaeda won the lottery into Hope's Peak, you had written a letter to the Steering Committee, claiming you were an isekai victim. Komaeda had vouched, and after some digging into records, yours didn't come up, leading to your admittance. He doesn't know what you had to do in order to join the school, but when you headed home quietly and slumped into the pillows, he knew better than to ask.
The ultimate unknown.
You hated the title, but you had accepted it. In exchange, you were to reveal nothing to the class and stay silent at all times. Komaeda had watched you stop talking to the class, going mute, only communicating with your body language. Even when you had asked Komaeda out, it had been through drawing on his palm away from the sight of the rest of the school. He didn't understand why you had listened to them so thoroughly or why you had grimaced whenever you saw the underclassmen. Though, Komaeda doesn't remember who the underclassmen were either.
His second year at Hope's Peak was on an island. There was no way he would know.
On the island, you still kept silent. The class knew you were quiet, so no one questioned it, but Komaeda had hoped you would at least speak to him. You didn't like to. You spoke even less when he pissed you off. You had known that he would kill Twogami and tried to interfere, and the only thing that resulted in was the murder being pinned on you. Komaeda had half-expected that you would thank him when he explained he planned it, but instead, you had stared quietly at him. It was as if you hadn't cared that he was pining the blame on you and taking it back.
When you had searched the body, you had stared at Komaeda. You hadn't spoke, but you had mouthed the words. He knew what you meant. He definitely knew what you meant. You were just waiting for him to make the decision himself. Even as he was being dragged off and begging for you to understand, you had stared lifelessly at him. It was as if you were desensitized and didn't care at all. Komaeda doesn't know how a person like you exists.
You were weird.
You wander into Mahiru's room, staring at Komaeda, telling him to investigate without a word.
Komaeda thinks he was chosen to be your servant as you leave the cottage.
Yet, as you smack him in the back of his head and bow to Chiaki and Hinata in apology, he thinks you take more than enough responsibility.
Before the trial, you always scribble down what you can and can't remember to hand to Hinata. It's a cheat sheet that Komaeda isn't allowed to look at. He wonders if they're love letters sometimes, but as you're crying and holding back quiet tears in your cottage in the dead of night, he leaves you be. Even if it was a love letter, he wasn't going to let you keep everything to yourself. Hinata had pushed through each trial without error, and Komaeda suspects that you had been behind everything. You were the puppetmaster, maybe.
You even got to punt Monokuma when you were mad enough.
Though, Komaeda stares at you during trials, forming words with your hands and crossing your arms when a student got something wrong. You were charismatic. He didn't deserve you, the class didn't deserve you, the world didn't deserve you. You knew what was going to happen, clinging onto Fuyuhiko with your life as he tried running to Peko, face burrowed into his arm as the rest of the class helped you hold him back. You couldn't speak in front of them, Komaeda had realized. You pull on Komaeda's sleeve desperately. He supposes that's all you need to do.
"Do not atone for a crime you did not commit." Komaeda reads your eyes. "You must survive for her. You must survive for Peko..." Komaeda gets on a knee to wipe the tears from your eyes. "The crime was not instigated by you, so there is no need to-"
"What do you mean it wasn't instigated by me?! I was the one who told her to kill her!"
"A lie." Komaeda holds you to his chest as you cry quietly. "It's a lie. She killed her out of her own volition."
"She-"
You pass out in Komaeda's arms, and Fuyuhiko grabs him by the shirt as Chiaki reaches to catch you.
Ah.
"I was just conveying my angel's words." Komaeda holds his hands up innocently.
You wake up the next morning to Hiyoko's memorial for Mahiru. The class berates the girl as you blow out the candles and replace them one by one. You have Nekomaru help you remove the skull, replacing it with flowers instead. You finish by the time of the announcement that a new island had popped up. Komaeda stares at the memorial, and you pull him with you as you go explore the new island. He praises you quietly under his breath, and you answer quietly too. You stick close to Fuyuhiko with Komaeda, peering at the shorter every now and then to make sure he's alright. Komaeda is almost jealous of how much attention you give him. Yet, you keep Komaeda close anyways.
As expected, the next day, Fuyuhiko tries cutting his stomach open to repent. You react immediately as soon as he speaks, knocking him down and throwing the knife from his hands, cutting your own in the process. You stare at him wide-eyed, holding your hands up in the form of an X. He stares up at you, furious that you would interrupt him, but you stare down at him sternly, only getting up to take the knife before he could. Komaeda watches everything unfold, wondering if he had done something wrong for you to straddle another. He doesn't question it.
Especially not when you press your lips to his cheek later that night before bed as he bandages your hand.
When he wakes up, he brushes his fingers against your hair, mumbling about how pretty you were. You were pretty. He doesn't know what draws him to you, but you're pretty. Maybe he'll wake up every morning to you.
"ah... how filthy," Komaeda doesn't register that his words are coming out wrong. He continues to pour praises about how pretty you are, the fever making it so that he thinks he's praising you. That's when he realizes he's sick. He's feverish all over, and you hadn't spoken when he draped himself on you, eyes fluttering, almost drunk. When the two of you make it to the restaurant, you sit down in a seat, mumbling quietly. You pull him with you as Monokuma explains the new motive. Komaeda's sure he's mumbling nothing but disgusting words into your ear as you support him, but you seem unphased.
As Mikan tends to him in the hospital and you sit in his room, you start speaking.
"Komaeda-kun, I'm sure you won't remember any of this," You hum, turning to look to the side. "But I love you a lot, alright?"
"I hate you too."
Komaeda clings on to you as you sleep next to him, wrapping his hand around yours tightly, squeezing it every now and then. He stares down at your sleeping form. He could kill you here. He could end the motive right there. He has a weak body, and he isn't sure if he could survive if he continues to be sick. He loves you a lot; he mumbles. He's pathetically in love with how pretty you are. He wonders if the words reach you.
The days in the hospital are boring at first. You try playing cards with him, only to find that he's too sick to do so. That only feeds your boredom. At some point, you grow so bored that you start playing smash or pass with Komaeda. He has no idea what you mean, but you show him images and recall celebrities, asking Komaeda smash or pass. At some point, you start naming classmates and students.
"Hinata."
"Half pass."
"Me?"
"Pass."
"Really?" You spring out of your seat, eyes wide, staring down at him.
"You heard me. Pass." Komaeda grimaces at you, and you blink at him happily.
"I'd smash you too."
Komaeda really wants to tell you how lovestruck he is with you, but he supposes he doesn't need to as you climb into bed with him. You blink at him curiously, and he moves his hand to pinch your cheeks. He frowns, his mind telling him that he's smiling. He sneers when he thinks he's mumbling, and he coughs when he thinks his breath is caught in his throat. There are so many weird things going on with his body.
"When was the last time we fucked again?"
"We've fucked plenty."
"I guess that makes sense," You close your eyes, leaning your ear on his chest. "Your heart is beating quickly."
"It's 'cause you're disgusting."
"Whatever you say," You drift off, and Komaeda finds himself staring down at you. He wonders what his eyes look like. Does it look the way that his parents and the couples on the street did? Maybe he does. He wonders how much he could love a person. His heart feels as though it's going to burst at any moment. You were... he brushes your hair to the side, pressing his lips to your forehead. Maybe he wouldn't remember this once he recovered.
How pretty.
In the bright morning, Komaeda feels his lungs tighten and starts coughing. You get out of bed, blinking slowly. Ah. You caught it too. Yet, you call Mikan into the room anyways, watching as she starts tending to Komaeda full-time. You try your best to blink the disease off and come off as fine. You don't know how you're acting. Yet as Mikan holds the pillow in her hand, you remember something. You push her to the ground, eyes animalistic, chest heaving, a psychotic grin on your face. You stare down at her, straddling her, nails bloodied with her skin and blood.
Mikan scurries off in fear, and you sit on the ground, blood from Mikan's skin in your nails.
You bite your nails, lucking the blood, staring at Hinata as he enters the room.
By the time you're conscious again, there are two bodies.
Komaeda's the one to wake you. You sit up on the hospital bed, rubbing your eyes as Komaeda stares at you. The room is an eerie shade of white, and your head spins deliriously as you try and recall what had happened. Komaeda stands there, staring down at you, waiting for you to adjust to the feeling of being conscious again. You hold on to him as you steady yourself, and your mouth opens as you're conscious again.
"Two people died."
You nod slowly.
"Come on."
You follow Komaeda as he starts investigating, and you glance at the two dead bodies. Ibuki is hung on the rope, and you stare up at her body as Hinata lowers it to the floor. You stare quietly; lifelessly; almost as if you were the body itself. You don't feel real, still. Komaeda rubs his hand on your back gently, and you blink slowly. Then, you stare at Hiyoko's body as the ladder is put up to search the body and check for clues. You have a couple of hours, you think. You know who the killer is, and you were so sure that Komaeda might have died if you had not stayed in the same room as him. The rest of the class decides to search for more evidence elsewhere as you and Komaeda stay behind.
"It's a shame," You mumble under your breath as Komaeda searches Ibuki's body. "I liked Ibuki too."
Komaeda stares at you.
"Do you like me too?"
You only nod in response.
He doesn't remember. Komaeda thinks he's forgetting something as he progresses through the investigation. He did something with you. You did something with him. You call Hinata with movie tickets, waving your hand for him. You leave Komaeda in his place as you enter the movie theatre with Hinata. Komaeda only knows to wait outside the theatre, and halfway through the movie, you open the door to pull him in as well. Maybe you didn't forget him. Though, Hinata was sitting next to you. It makes him uncomfortable.
Hinata looks frazzled as you sit back next to him, and you tilt your head.
It was a bad movie, according to Hinata. You point at the ticket, and Komaeda opens his mouth to help you translate. Hinata cuts him off.
"Keep the ticket, right? Thank you," Hinata smiles.
Komaeda gets insecure easily, now that he thinks about it. He stares at you as you slip something to Hinata before the trial, and Komaeda fiddles with his fingers. Maybe you would leave him for Hinata one day. You step back next to him, taking his hand in yours, playing with his fingers. Komaeda's breath catches in his throat, and he swallows thickly. How painful. Were you going to play him even until you decide to leave him? How could you be so cruel?
Maybe he would tell you he's scared one day.
You argue from next to Hinata, explaining everything from start to the end of your memories.
Ah.
Komaeda watches as you blaze next to Hinata, and his heart sinks. You... looked much better with him. Was that your fate? To leave him? Maybe he would be a stepping stone for your hope. There was no way you would love him so much. Komaeda keeps the trial moving as you stare at him. It's like he's reading a script out of your eyes. And the culprit tumbles out of your eyes right onto Komaeda's lips as he turns to stare at Mikan.
"Mikan was the killer." Komaeda stares at Mikan, tilting his head. "Ultimate Despair."
You want to leave your podium and yank him, but he goes on a tangent, and you stare at Komaeda until he notices.
"Ah, angel," He swallows. "Sorry."
Hinata continues with the trial, and you go silent to stare at Komaeda. He... had ruined your streak, didn't he? Of course, he wasn't worth sticking around you, but he had thought just for a moment. Maybe. Maybe you would let him. Turns out he was wrong. He stays quiet for the rest of the trial, letting you do what you were supposed to before he had interrupted.
Mikan is deduced as the killer, and Mikan is executed. You stand on an orchestrated stage, and Komaeda tries going up to you after the trial. You let him stand next to you, but you don't let him talk to you. You aren't responding. Not even with your eyes. You avoid his gaze as he follows you. Even as you sit down in the cottage and pull him into bed, you don't talk to him. Komaeda catches your eyes once. You look hurt.
He's scared to touch you tonight.
Yet, as you snuggle to his back as he seems to be asleep, maybe you'll find it in your heart to forgive him.
Another island is unlocked the next day, and Komaeda's scared to face you.
You get out of bed without reaching to wake him, and you shower first thing. It's strange. He sits in the room as he stares at you leave the bathroom, tower wrapped around your chest.
"I'm sorry," the words tumble out of his lips. "let me... make it up to you?"
You stare at him, tilting your head. "how?"
He steps up to you, getting on his knees, glancing up at you.
"Can I?"
You stare down at him, swallowing. "Yeah."
You pull him to the bed, and he shakes slightly as you sit on the bed.
You're naked before him. In front of him. You're naked from head to toe. Komaeda takes your body in quietly. When was the last time you were bare before him? When was the last time you had let him touch you like this? God, what if he doesn't remember what you like? Maybe you'd push him off. Maybe you'd get even angrier at him. He doesn't realize he's shaking until you're speaking.
"Stop thinking so hard," You frown, reaching for his face, propping up on your elbows.
"Sorry."
Komaeda eats you out desperately. You don't recall a moment when he wasn't writhing to please you to the moon and back. You suppose he drinks up whatever reaction you give to him. His eyes are half-lidded, pressing a kiss to your clit before starting. Komaeda likes taking his time. He's spent hours between your legs drawing orgasms out of your body before finally tending to you, usually leaking and in pain. You wonder if he can feel how painful it is.
Komaeda likes sitting between your legs. He feels it's fitting for someone who should be nothing more than a mere tool to the ultimates like you. You were being kind enough, letting him dirty you with his body. He's a little messy, he thinks, but you like it when he makes a mess. You never berate him for making a mess. Maybe you were a blessing just for him. Who knows.
Your fingers tangle in the sheets as Komaeda sits between your legs, hands keeping your legs opened, tongue prodding and twisting inside of you. Your breathy moans fill the room, your breath quickening as Komaeda grows more desperate to get you to cum. It's strange. Nothing feels right. You usually cum from his tongue alone. Was he getting worse? He's so lost in his own thoughts he doesn't realize you've already cum and you're writhing in overstimulation.
"K-ko," You whine. "S-stop,"
Komaeda stops immediately, apologies spilling out of his lips in terror.
Your chest heaves as you catch your breath, and you close your eyes.
"We'll be doing that a lot more soon," Your breath catches in your throat as you sit up, and Komaeda grabs a towel to clean you off.
Komaeda doesn't understand your words until Monokuma is telling the class that they're stuck with no food until someone commits a crime. You rock on your feet, glancing at Komaeda. He thinks he understands now. Yet, as you leave him outside, heading into the final dead room, Komaeda's uneasy. You bet Monokuma that requires five bullets in a revolver of six. When the sound of a gun goes down and you stare at your hands, you know you won. Glancing at Monokuma, he hands you the file begrudgingly, complaining about how it was pure luck that you had won the file.
Your own name is found, and you stare blankly at the file.
Komaeda watches you return to bed that same night, still silent as ever. He coughs twice, and he stares at you.
"Hungry?" You stare at him.
Komaeda holds his breath.
"What's wrong?"
"You'll find out."
Komaeda has dinner as you do.
Komaeda drags you downstairs with him as the two of you head to Monokuma Tai Chi. A body announcement is made, and you stare across the room. Komaeda helps investigate, and he turns to stare at you. You lead him to the final dead room, laughing dryly as you look at the door again. Komaeda waits for you to get it out of your system before asking you anything. He's the ultimate luck. It'd only make sense for him to enter the room.
"May I..."
"Come back alive." You stare at Komaeda as he opens the door to the final dead room.
"Ah." Komaeda stares down at the book, heart quivering. He has to make a choice, doesn't he? He has to worry about.
This trial, Komaeda keeps silent. You don't tell him to speak, and you don't speak through him either. He feels as if he's stuck. A crossroad of destiny, perhaps. Star-crossed. It feels terrible. Komaeda doesn't know what this does to the two of you. Were you even considered lovers? How could Komaeda date someone that was the ultimate despair even though he was one too? Even as the two of you return home and you don't speak, Komaeda feels his own words caught in his throat, unsure how to ask.
"I'm in a coma," You stare at Komaeda.
"And you're... an ultimate despair."
You blink slowly.
"Yeah."
"What does..."
"We're on even ground," You exhale. "The world ended at our hands. It's that's simple."
Komaeda's voice catches in his throat, heart breaking. He shakes as you sit there, staring at him back in the room of your cabins. The stars spill secrets that neither of you speak up about, and you don't dare to meet his eyes. It was terrifying for you. You didn't know if he would leave you or do something. You get out of bed for the first time since arriving on the island, and your voice shakes as you speak.
"I'll... sleep in my cabin tonight." You mumble, rushing off.
Komaeda sits there without moving until the sun rises.
You're... an ultimate despair. You were an ultimate who caused despair. The entire class was. There was a single person on the entire island that didn't cause despair and it wasn't you. But. But. You had. You had just. You were. You were his entire symbol of hope. How could it be that you had known the entire time? You knew everything. From start to finish, you were orchestrating it all? Was that... what you were? Was he actually just a puppet in your play?
Komaeda checks on you the third day, wondering if you had spiraled as bad as he did. You're in your room, biting your nails, connecting red strings to others, desperate to get your thoughts in tow. There was one last trial. There was one last trial. One final person had to die. You couldn't let a single flaw escape from your fingers for this last trial. You chew on your lip, mumbling words to yourself over and over again. You're going to end up in tears. You don't remember the last time you felt this terrible.
Your hair is disheveled as you arrange the papers again, desperate to find the pattern. You have to know. You can't do it. You can't live knowing you'll never wake up and Komaeda one day will. You can't let him die. He can't die. How could you just let him die? You can leave the death to yourself. Worst comes to worst, you die with him. It's not that hard, right? You were just in a coma in real life. You don't know if you'd wake up with the rest of the class when they're all discharged.
Komaeda stares at you quietly.
"Angel?"
You turn your head to stare at him, deer in headlights, heart racing, dried tear stains on your cheeks. Komaeda has never seen you look so disheveled before. He lowers himself to his knees, brushing your hair back, pausing to see what you wanted. what you needed. You needed him, perhaps. You needed him just as badly as he needed you. He had to remember that. He was useless without you just as you were without him; even if the two of you were an ultimate despair.
"What's wrong?"
You burst into tears, coughing from the tears and pressure of it all. You hack furiously, hiccupping and sobbing into his arms. Drool slips past your lips and snot gets all over Komaeda's sleeve as he reaches to catch you before you collapsed onto the ground and bowed all the way to the ground. He couldn't let you do that for trash like him. But why... why were you crying like that? You looked more terrified than miserable.
"Don't die." You mumble, staring at the floor, still dissociated. "Please don't die. I'll kill myself if you don't do it. Please." Your fingers dig into his skin, and he pauses. You break his pause with more words. "Please don't kill yourself. I'm... I'm begging you. don't die. don't die. Please, don't die. Don't die, Ko. I'll kill everyone else on the island if it makes you feel better since I'm a dirty sinner anyways. I'll-"
"Angel," Komaeda cups your face, tilting your chin to stare at him. "Angel, it's okay. It's going to be okay. Come on-"
You cough, a mess of snot and tears in his arms. You lean in his arms pathetically, throat dry, eyes dead with exhaustion. Komaeda feels bad. Was he the reason you looked so terrible? He should make up for it somehow. Yet, as you cough furiously in his arms and only quiet down after he shushes you quietly, drawing circles on your skin. You look beyond repair. You look as though your entire life was crashing before your eyes, and you were without hope.
"Angel," Komaeda lowers his face to yours. "What's wrong?
You sniff pathetically.
"What's going to happen?"
You refuse to tell him. You stand up instead, staring at the scattered papers on the ground, kicking them all out of order, picking them up, and making Komaeda stand outside as you do so. You go back to sticking around him without telling him anything. You need the final motive, sure, but you wanted Komaeda to stay. Was it selfish? Komaeda reads the words off of you in waves. He sits in the dining room. Maybe reading you was harder for him.
He's not opposed to the idea of killing himself for the better hope. He obeys your word, after all.
"Why are you helping?" Komaeda watches as you tie the rope to him.
You decided dying with him was the best option.
"I'm going to miss her," You sit down next to him, legs tucked to your chest, leaning your cheek on your knees.
"Chiaki?"
"She doesn't have a body," You hum lowly. "You won't ever see her again."
"Ah." Komaeda's eyes widen as you stab yourself with the same knife. "What about you?"
You smile.
You avoid the topic.
"You know, Ko," You trace his face on your arm, "I love you a lot."
"Really?"
"Yeah," You smile. "I hope you remember that."
You die with Komaeda. The two of you sit in the room talking before the rest of the class breaks in, the poison killing the both of you instantly. You don't remember much after that. You wake up in the darkness, looking around. It's boring, you think. It would take at least a day or two for the game to wrap up. The pixels form before your eyes, and you stare at your hand as you end up in the void.
You find yourself wandering in the void, running at some point, walking in others. You're waiting for the system to be shut down so you can go back into the comatose state. Chiaki appears after searching for a little while. You run over to her, sitting down next to her. She smiles at you, handing you a notepad in case you needed it. You ditch it. She's a robot. It wouldn't kill to tell her.
"Are you well?"
"I hope we get to meet again," You blurt.
Chiaki blinks slowly. "You... speak."
You grin. "I do. My real talent has nothing to do with being the ultimate unknown. I am just a fortunate isekai victim."
So you talk with Chiaki. While Komaeda's mind forms a world where which isn't demented, you sit in the void, talking to Chiaki, playing imaginary cards and spilling your secrets. You don't know when you'll wake up. Chiaki reports what's going on outside every now and then, explaining who's awake and who's yet to wake up. Komaeda holds on to his fantasy that everything is normal. You know he does.
Chiaki speaks up one day.
"Your body is showing signs of waking up."
You pause. "Really?"
"Komaeda woke up two days ago. According to Hinata... he's also," She doesn't know how to tell you.
"Just say it."
"Komaeda got hit by a truck. He's conscious but severely injured."
"Is that why I'm waking up?"
"Yeah." Chiaki laughs lightheartedly. "I'll miss playing imaginary cards."
"I will too," You smile at her.
You wake up a day later, sitting up in your pod, blinking slowly at your hands.
Your legs have no strength, you find.
Naegi is kind enough to put you in the same hospital room as Komaeda, and you pull the curtain between the two beds down, grinning at Komaeda.
"Good morning." You smile.
Komaeda smiles back at you.
You do physical therapy with Mikan's help in the room, and your legs are restored as Komaeda is recovered.
"We should get married," You sit by his bed, leaning on your palm as he blinks at you slowly. Komaeda laughs airily, coughing when his lungs start hurting.
"I wonder what kind of suffering I would have to go through if we do."
"I'll bear half of it," You grin cheekily. "Til death do us part, after all."
"But we're not married," He hums.
"Not yet," You rest your head on his hand, humming to yourself. You stare at his ring finger, lips pulled into a smile.
"You plan on marrying trash like me?"
"You're not trash," You close your eyes. "You woke me up from an indefinite coma, did you not?"
Komaeda sighs. "But you were still injured."
"It's better than nothing," You doze off. "love..."
You stay quiet for the most part, making noises and showing improvement in vocal therapy. Komaeda sits with you some days in the wheelchair as you open your mouth to speak. Other days, he does physical therapy on the side while you learn to speak. The two of you return to your hospital room and talk about everything when you finish. There was no need for security when the island was only with so many people.
"What did you learn today?"
"Names," You start counting on your fingers. "Komaeda, Hinata, Fuyuhiko, the list goes on."
"That's it?"
"We start verbs tomorrow since I accidentally pronounced your name a little too well."
Komaeda chuckles, wrapping an arm around your waist lazily. "Is it fun?"
"No," You mumble back, voice just as sleepy as his. "I hate it."
There's little to do in a hospital, you think. You play cards with Komaeda when you're bored, and other days you play chopsticks. The majority of the time, the two of you sit there in silence during the day. When it's night, the two of you are too tired to do anything, so there's little to no conversation. Komaeda offers to pretend to teach you how to speak so the two of you can communicate. You refuse him.
You decide a miracle would be funnier.
You start speaking to Komaeda during the day to see who notices first. The two of you bet on different students. Komaeda bets on Hinata, and you bet on Mikan.
You win the bet as you're rambling about how shit the school is to Komaeda on a Thursday afternoon immediately after class and Mikan walks in to check up on you. Komaeda needs to be discharged, so you win the bet instead of him. You think it's a trade-off you're fine with. Komaeda being healed at the cost of anything for you was more than worth the price. You just wished he cared a little more about himself.
"I-If you can speak fluently," Mikan stares at the papers in her hands. "Th-then it's completely pointless to k-keep you here!"
You smile. "I've been able to talk. I justâ" You pause to think of the word. "have been told to keep quiet."
Hinata runs check-ups with Mikan on you as you speak to them normally. You're fine to go; you're told. Komaeda takes you back to your shared cabin, grinning from ear to ear as you stretch your arms. It's surprising that you could speak so well. You don't know what to do. You don't know the amount of time that passes from one event to the next, and you chew on your bottom lip as you sit in your room.
Komaeda pulls your bottom lip from your teeth, handing you a cup of tea instead.
"What's wrong?"
You blink slowly. "We have one final event. Has Hinata looked for Mitarai?"
"He has. Why?"
You pause before closing your mouth. You grimace slowly, and Komaeda sits on the floor with you, tilting his head to stare at you properly. You look older. You've aged. Your anxiety is much worse than while in the simulation, and he does his best to fix you. You can't fix someone if you're broken as well.
Komaeda finishes therapy and accompanies you to your sessions, easing you into the sessions slowly. It's an improvement. You learn to calm down and loosen up. It's something about how you have to let go of control. It's scary. Komaeda's told to take care of you to whatever extent he can manage, and make you feel as though you have something to lean on that isn't predestinated knowledge. Komaeda doesn't know if he's really suited for the position, but he doesn't find it in himself to doubt you.
You recover slowly, and it seems as though your recovery process reverts as soon as the third killing game begins. You stare in horror at the livestream while everyone on the island starts gearing up. You don't know what to feel. That was the last you knew about the series. It was the last you knew about anything. It was. It was terrifying. You wouldn't know anything about the future, and you had been living off of the knowledge you had. How... how do you survive? What happens to the remnants? Do they return to the island? Do they go somewhere else? Wasn't the final killing game on the island?
When Komaeda returns on the boat, he brings a small gift with him. You collapse on him as he exits the boat, and Komaeda stays on the ground even as he helps you up. You wipe your tears with a frown, and you pause when you notice he hasn't stood up. You tilt your head, getting back on your knees to stare at him in curiosity. Komaeda laughs awkwardly, getting up. He... he can't just ask you to stay with him in front of everyone. It might make you feel obligated to say yes to him. He presses kisses to your forehead instead, laughing airily and joking about how you took his breath away. You smack him lightly in retaliation, embarrassment all over your face.
But days are mundane to Komaeda once they return to the island. You walk with him in the mornings, and you sit with him during mealtimes. The rest of the class gets along with you well, and the two of you do everything together. Komaeda fears you'll grow bored of him. His hesitation seeps into the things the two of you do normally, and you notice his change in behavior immediately. You never mention anything as he tries to pull away slowly, and you find yourself sitting in empty bedrooms, waiting for Komaeda to return. Some days, he doesn't. Other days, he returns when it's morning and the energy has been drained out of your soul.
You think you're doing something wrong. You don't understand why he's so desperate to leave you. Maybe you're doing something wrong. Maybe you're of no more use now that you don't know the future anymore. It eats you away slowly as you sit at the diner, chewing down breakfast slowly. Teruteru asks if it's because you don't like the food, and you assure him it's not. You wonder if you just have your emotions written all over your face. Though, no one else on the island mentions anything as you eat less and less. You wonder if Komaeda eats at all.
Well, communication is key, you suppose.
You rub your eyes slowly as the sun rises, and you mumble to yourself. Komaeda hasn't come back again.
You close your eyes and fall asleep on the couch. The bed is too big without him around.
Komaeda returns to the cottage to grab his things.
His heart drops to his stomach as he sees you sleeping on the couch. You... you don't like him. Why are you eating yourself away so that you'll continue to like him even if he treats you terribly? You have so many more people that could fall in love with you and date, yet you were killing yourself over someone as unimportant as him. He grabs the blanket from the bed, and he covers you with it, turning around to get his stuff.
"Nagito Komaeda." Your voice comes out surprisingly clear for someone who was asleep. You don't move, but Komaeda can tell you want him to stay.
"I'm sorry." He grabs what he was looking for, and you sob quietly as the door to the cottage closes with a click.
The depression chips at you slowly. You stay pooled in your cottage, relying on classmates sending food to you and only eating small portions. You wonder how bad you must have it when even Teruteru's cooking doesn't lift your spirits. Your talent no longer exists. Is that why Komaeda no longer wants you? You sit there in your room, rotting away, the blanket wrapped around your body, your existence slowly slipping away, dissociating, fading in and out, sometimes bleeding at the wrist and other times bleeding at the fingertips.
But the depression disappears one day as your brain goes into autopilot. You pack your things by yourself, and you stare at the photo of you and Komaeda on the coffee table, putting it face down as you open your laptop to reach Naegi. You want to leave the island. Your talent is the ultimate unknown, so it'd only make sense that you end up somewhere that no one knows about.
You leave the island in the dead of night, your presence completely erased along with it.
You sit in the helicopter, staring at the setting moon and rising sun, watching the stars twinkle out of life and clouds grow more visible. Maybe it was something you were supposed to do from the start. Maybe it was something that you were meant to do. You were supposed to be isekaied by now, right? That was the plan? You chew on your bottom lip as you land in the future foundation headquarters, and you go through the process with a new identity, making your way of life in the remnants of the city, the broken buildings now slowly coming back to life. You try to ignore the lack of consciousness as you do everything.
Komaeda thinks he hallucinated your entire existence when he steps into your shared cottage the day you left. You hadn't been at breakfast for the seventh time that week, and he drops the tray of food at the sight of a clean and neat cottage. It was impossible for someone who was as shattered as you to do. It's impossible. He looks around the cottage urgently, crying, begging, praying that there was a trace of you to remember just for a moment.
There's nothing.
So instead, Komaeda runs back to the restaurant, opening the doors panting. The class turns to stare at him, and his breath catches in his throat as he doesn't know how to explain that you had just disappeared without a trace off of the island. His breathing turns static as he coughs and cries, trying to explain through his pathetic sobs that you had just disappeared, and you were gone without a trace, and that you had just left as if you were never there, and that he wanted to apologize and try to talk it out with you but he had found an empty cottage without anything that could possibly remind him of your existence; it was a terrible thing to think of, and his head spins dizzily. He was going to tell you that his illness was gone and that he would be able to spend time with you again, but you had just disappearedâ you wereâ you justâ you just left him alone on an island of ultimates, people who he considered nothing more than classmates and friends when he cared, but you, his lover, the only person in the world to ever tell him that he was worth something and not insult him, was gone, and he couldn't live withouâ
Komaeda passes out before he can say anything else, the stress of everything collapsing on him at once. The class rushes him to the hospital, and Mikan and Hinata check his vitals, trying their best to calm his heart somehow before he died of a heart attack. His body fights it, almost as if desperate to die and shatter and break. Komaeda's consciousness doesn't want to live or come back to life. Yet, the two succeed anyway, the boy jumping awake as he's defibrillated back to life.
Komaeda doesn't know why he woke up within a day. He would have rather just died now that you weren't on the island anymore. He starts crying immediately upon waking up, the tears making him choke, snot running down his nose and tears staining his cheeks with tracks and tracks of salt. He thinks he's going to die from how hard he's crying. His breath catches in his throat, the hiccuping killing his lungs. God. Is this how pathetic he was? Was he really nothing without you? Why did he push you away? He should've just let you destroy him next to youâ
You suppose you don't suffer any less.
You sit in the coffee shop in the city, and you press the coffee to your lips, planning your next route to nowhere. You want to wander. Your backpack is packed and ready, and you're excited to leave something behind for once. Yet, the sense of dread that plagues your whole body at the thought of leaving your only pillar of support in the universe hurts you. You don't know how to let you. You don't know if you want to know if you even know how to let go.
You receive a letter from Naegi from the island. A letter that was several papers taped together. A letter that rolls on the ground as you open it in front of the man, and a letter that's longer than a senior thesis paper. You read the first two lines, and you recognize it as Hinata's writing. You refuse to touch it at first, waving Naegi off, but all it takes is a mention of Komaeda's name.
It's every single doctor's report for Komaeda's illness starting from the day you left the island.
"What's... wrong?" Naegi watches your resolve waver.
"Komaeda is bedridden and had a heart attack the morning I left the island," You read every single report, and you pause when you reach the end. He still hasn't been discharged.
"Do you have paper and an envelope?" You stare at the man.
Komaeda receives a letter passed on from Hinata detailing a single word, and Komaeda runs.
He takes a helicopter to the mainland, and his heart races in his chest the entire time. He has to find you. It doesn't matter if you'd slap him or break him or shatter him into pieces like he had done with you, he has to have you back in his hands. He knows where you want him to be, and he doesn't know what time it is or why his bones hurt, but he knows where you're waiting, and he'd hate to keep you waiting even longer than he's had you wait. He doesn't know why the two of you are stuck. He doesn't understand why everything hurts him in the way it does, but he does know that he misses you terribly.
He reaches where you want him, sitting down on the same bench when he had met you, and he pulls out the blades from his jacket, cutting two lines to make sure you wouldn't leave before he could apologize. The blood stains his jacket, but he could never be too safe. He grimaces.
You leave your bag with Naegi, stepping up the stairs into Monaca's old tower. You're surprised that there was still one left, and you sit at the top of the stairs, glancing down at the rest of Towa city. You wonder if Komaeda would know that you're referring to here instead of the bench. Maybe he'd realize it after a little while.
So, the sun sets, and you start back down the tower. The walls of it are torn, the brick showing through the wallpaper, and the mold and moss from the natural tragedies during the tragedy. You wonder if Komaeda would remember this place at all. You don't know how many years you spent in the tower with him, doing everything you could for Junko. It wasn't even despair, now that you think of it. You were just enamored with Komaeda. That desperate. Desperate to the point that you'd do anything for him. You wonder if your memories were erased. You don't know.
The place brings bad memories. Maybe it was time to leave.
The sound of running upstairs causes you to stop in your steps, and you stare down at Komaeda.
Komaeda stares up at you, stars in the background, the wind brushing your hair gently, and his legs give out. You rush to him immediately as he cries at the sight of you, and his lungs burn as he tries to catch his breath despite the tears. He clings onto your forearms, mindless babbles slipping past his lips as he cries and tries to explain himself. You catch little comprehensible words. Words like "help" "sorry" and "fault", and you wait until he calms down enough to speak to you, assuring him that you wouldn't leave.
Your heart twists and burns in your chest. You want to cry just as badly as he does.
Komaeda cries in your arms, hiccupping, clinging onto your arm pathetically. It looks familiar. It's like watching yourself break down before the fifth trial, except its Komaeda crying harsh tears over you leaving him. Maybe you came full circle. You don't know. All you know is that you should've never left the island and rotted in your place for a little longer. Maybe Komaeda wouldn't have had heart problems if you had never left. You don't know. You think you hurt him enough.
Komaeda calms eventually, wiping the snot and tears from his face, staring quietly at the tissue. He really was pathetic without you.
"I'm sorry." He manages. "I was going toâ" He pauses, averting his gaze to the side. "I was going to... give you a ring when I got off the boat as a promise but I didn't want it to seem like I was proposing because then that would be like forcing you to marry me in front of the entire classâ"
"You were going to what?" You stare at Komaeda in your arms, blinking, eyes wide.
"give you a ring?"
"You brought me a ring from the mainland?"
"Y-yeah?"
"How'd you even get one?" Your arms tighten around him, and you rest your chin on his head as you stare down at the stairs.
"Uh," Komaeda stumbles over himself. "I dug around my old mansion."
You laugh, pulling him close to your chest. "From your dead parents?"
"Mom's engagement ring," Komaeda smiles at the sound of your laughter.
"Do you think that's why we fought? The dead's vengeance?"
"Mother doesn't approve," Komaeda hums. "Mother knows best."
"Motherrrrr," You grin, "knows best." You pause, staring at the sunrise. "Would you say yes if I were to propose?"
"I can't live without you."
That's all you need to hear.
Some days you think too hard. Komaeda grows used to it, sitting down with you, the fireplace on, tea in your hands as he sits next to you. He doesn't know what to feel about living a casual, retired life. The two of you are back to a mundane life. The two of you swing back and forth, the sun counting your days. You wonder if Komaeda's going to propose or if he was just saying it to get you back with him.
Though, you suppose thoughts are fleeting.
You grow tired of waiting for Komaeda to propose. You stumble into Souda's cabin one afternoon, staring at him in the eye until he notices you. He yelps as he does, and you as him if he has a metal band. You wonder where you get the talent for being able to do everything as long as you have the audacity to. You bring a mirror into your old cabin, playing with polymer clay and making flowers, gluing them onto the mirror, sanding the ring and making sure you remember Komaeda's ring size as you fall asleep next to him each night.
Komaeda thinks you're up to something, but he stays put. Maybe you were going to surprise him.
The anxiety is much quieter these days, and he finds himself sitting in your shared cabin, waiting for you to come back. You go missing more often. Maybe you're running around the island exploring. You always liked wandering more than anything else. He wonders if you'd pass away on accident one day. Your ultimate talent was scary. Your real one. You could be taken away from him at any time.
"I have a surprise." You peek through the door, blinking at Komaeda rapidly.
"A good one or bad one?"
"Good one," You hum.
Komaeda follows you as you drag him to your cabin, and he pauses at the sight of roses.
"A... angel?"
"I made us a mirror." You fiddle with your fingers.
Komaeda pulls you with him as he steps into the place, and he stares at the heart-shaped mirror. The clay flowers around it cause him to pause, and he stares at the metal band that glistens, hiding in a piece of clay. Komaeda pauses at the sight of the other hole, and he pulls the ring from his pocket, slipping it into the slot, turning to grin at you.
"Ah, it seems-" He pauses at the sight of you on one knee.
"I had this whole speech prepared about how I had fallen in love with you the moment we met, but the second you put my ring in the slot my brain completely malfunctioned and I forgot half of it," You pull another ring from your pocket, and you hold it up for him. "I'm in love with you. Marry me?"
Komaeda blinks at the ring, and he stares at you, rummaging through his pocket.
Your heart rings in your head as he pulls out a ring of his own, holding it to your face.
"If you'll take mine."
You yank him onto the floor with you, wrapping your arms around his neck and laughing.
There are a lot of smiles and giggles with Komaeda while the two of you plan for a wedding. Komaeda lets you do what you want, offering his suggestion when you ask, finding that it's getting easier to read what you want and what you don't. In the meantime, while he does, you tell him how sweet he is to you, pressing kisses to his cheeks, letting him know you were sure about what you were doing. It was turbulent, you think. Komaeda seemed scared you would change your mind at first.
You remind him that you care about him quietly at night, tracing circles on his chest.
He watches you fall asleep at night, and he can't help the nasty thoughts that spiral in his mind as he bites back quiet moans as you're asleep next to him, bare skin kissed by the moon and water from the shower still fresh in your hair. He feels bad, whimpering and gasping as he plays with himself next to you, but surely you wouldn't mind, right? You never have; You've let him do whatever he wants. You've even mentioned letting him do whatever he wants to you while you're asleep, but he couldn't possibly soil your body with him.
You don't wake up. You've always slept deep, he finds. He could completely defile you head to toe and you wouldn't even notice as long as he cleaned you up. He parts your lips with his thumb, pressing a kiss to your lips before wiping himself down with a tissue, snuggling his head into your chest, falling asleep to the sound of your heartbeat.
Komaeda is less slick than he thinks he is.
You wake up earlier than him some days, staring at the stain on the sheets, stretching your arms, and reaching into his boxers. He tends to wake up with morning woods, his hormones still unbalanced despite his age. You don't know. You never studied the human body extensively. So, you do what you normally do, fingers freeing his cock from his boxers, spitting in your hand before running your hand through the slit to collect his precum and giving him a handjob. Some days, Komaeda wakes up with your mouth around his tongue, other days he wakes up to you reading a book while your hand is wrapped around his cock. Either way, he wakes up to himself moaning pathetically while you suck him off. He caught you kicking your legs once. He doesn't understand why you enjoy pleasing him, but he doesn't find it in himself to complain.
"I want snowdrops at the wedding," You pause. "On the dress, not the wedding. I'm not planting more flowers on the island when we already have a farm."
"It wouldn't hurt to get flowers planted."
"We're having a beachside wedding because you insisted it be one to match my fantasies," You glance at the flower catalog Naegi sent you. "Maybe I'll get a blue iris bouquet."
"Anything you want," Komaeda hums, staring at a suit catalog. "Can I just wear white?"
"Yeah." You pause. "I'm kicking you out when I pick the dress, by the way."
"And let Hinata take your nude measurements alone?"
"Sonia and Peko are going to be there," You grumble. "They've had it done before."
Komaeda pouts.
"You'll get to see it at the wedding. Isn't that enough?"
"Can I paint something for the wedding?"
"We have to plan gifts for each other, do we not?" You hum. "Like... I don't actually know what I'm going to get you."
"It's fine," Komaeda closes his eyes, the vibrations from his humming warming your skin. "I'll just spoil you rotten."
"What if I get used to it?"
"Then that would be the greatest blessing possible." Komaeda smiles.
Some days, you wonder how you ended up with Komaeda. You had been blinking slowly in and out of consciousness over a world that wasn't yours when you landed out of nowhere on top of Komaeda, and now you were planning a wedding with him. Other days, you wonder how you asked a complete stranger in English to live at his place temporarily, and now you were his home. You, a human, are his home. You gasp and twitch as he curls his fingers in you, cutting off your thought process.
"What were you thinking of?" Komaeda stares up at you from between your legs.
"A-ah," You whimper as he goes back to fingering you. "You-" You exhale. "I was thinking of you."
"Me?"
"Y-yeah," You hide your face in your hands as he presses a kiss to your clit. "H-how we met."
"You were an angel who fell out of heaven, I was convinced," The rest of Komaeda's words are muffled as he goes back to eating you out, eyes half-lidded as he focuses on you feverishly. You don't know where he gets the energy to stay between your legs when he can barely survive a round with you. The sounds of his tongue in you fill the room as you flush from how lewd it all sounds. You're embarrassed again.
"K-Ko," You whimper.
Komaeda raises a brow to stare at you, drawing hearts on your thigh as he goes back to eating you out when he notices it's just embarrassment. The coil in your stomach tightens as your hand threads through his hair, your thighs closing around his head as your orgasm approaches. You squirm before you do, and you let out a salacious moan as you cum on Komaeda's tongue for the nth time that night. You squirm from the overstimulation as the orgasm fades, and Komaeda wipes the cum from his face, licking off of his hand as he spreads your legs.
He pumps himself twice before pressing the tip of his cock to your clit.
"What's wrong?"
"S-sorry," Komaeda mumbles, kneading the skin on your hip. "T-thinking."
"About?"
"How far, ah," He whimpers as he fills you, resting his forehead on yours. "we've come." He blinks slowly as you push his hair back, leaning up to kiss him. "And how you're," He starts thrusting, slowly, almost as if he were cherishing you slowly, "underneath me, bare skin, and all." Komaeda thrusts steadily as you murmur for him to speed up, cheeks warm and skin flushed. Komaeda thinks you're pretty like this. He always thinks you're pretty, but you're just breathtaking under the moon, the white haze making you look holy. You were his angel. The angel that dropped into his life as he felt his life shatter in his hands that same day.
Komaeda's brows furrow as he feels himself get close, thrusting growing desperate, thumb on your clit, rubbing desperately. The coil in your stomach tightens, and your eyes widen, reaching for Komaeda's neck, squealing about how you're in love with him and how you're desperate to marry him and settle down, your overstimulation making your head spin, the words not registering as you cum on his cock. Komaeda's head rings from the praise you give him, a waterfall of pet names spilling. "Y-you're so pretty," You gasp. "Gorgeous. I think you were blessed by Aphrodite or something. Pretty. Pretty, pretty boy." You whine as he chases his own orgasm, your nails digging into his shoulders. "i love you so much. So much. K-ko, I'm so p-painfully in love with you-" You gasp as he cums, spilling into you with something between a whimper and moan.
He stays inside of you for a moment, waiting to catch his breath as you wipe the sweat from his forehead.
"Good boy," You smile, running your hand through his hair. "Such a pretty, good boy."
Komaeda laughs airily, pressing a kiss to the palm of your hand. "I love you too."
You turn your head to stare, and you pause. "We left the window open."
"Pray that Souda doesn't scream at us tomorrow," Komaeda pulls out of you, his cum trickling out of you, causing Komaeda's voice to catch in his throat. "You're pretty."
"You tell me that a lot," You sit up, pressing a kiss to his temple.
"I mean it," Komaeda relaxes at your touch, tension leaving his shoulders. "I mean it."
"I know you do," You get off the bed, grimacing at the sweat on your skin. Komaeda lies on the bed as you walk into the bathroom, coming out with a rag to wipe him down. Komaeda lifts his arms weakly as you wipe him, exhaling when you finish, pulling you for a kiss.
"Can I sleep first?"
"Of course," You press a kiss to his forehead. "Always."
The moon spills past the windows as you stare at Komaeda's chest rise and fall, skin paler than normal. You rest your hand on his hip, tracing circles on his skin, lashes fluttering as sleep threatens to take you. It's quiet, you think. A nice quiet. the type of quiet that you could grow used to, and a type of quiet you had wished for before getting isekaied. You don't want to leave him. You hope he reincarnates with you when the two of you die.
Komaeda blinks slowly in the morning, body sore. Though, his arms aren't as sore as they used to be. He blinks slowly, turning around to face you. He stares up at you, lashes fluttering, lips parting as he presses a kiss to yours. You're pretty. When the sun illuminates the room and the waves recede, you're gorgeous. The golden streaks of the sun reflect on your hair, and each individual cell of your body. Komaeda doesn't know what he could consider prettier.
"Mm?" You furrow your brows, Komaeda sitting up to cover the sun from your eyes. "Good morning."
"Good morning," Komaeda smiles.
"You're so hot," You yawn. "I'm so happy I'm marrying you."
Komaeda's cheeks redden, his heart racing. "love you too..."
The clocks on the walls pass quicker as the two of you get ready for the ceremony itself. Komaeda doesn't know what to feel. He's going to get to call you his wife. His spouse. He's going to be married soon. If he told himself back at Hope's Peak, he doubts he would believe himself. He's marrying you.
You sit up and rub your eyes, exhaling slowly. You stare outside the window, tossing the covers over your head again.
"I'm going back to bed."
Komaeda blinks slowly, snuggling closer to you. He doesn't want to get up either. He closes his eyes, only pausing when he remembers something important.
"You have to pick the dress today." He mumbles into your ear.
"Nevermind!" You jump out of bed, stretching your arms. Komaeda smiles as you yawn. "Do you want to see me in anything?"
"Do whatever you want," Komaeda smiles.
"I'm going to wear your servant chain to the wedding if you tell me to do whatever I want," You deadpan.
Komaeda chokes, coughing uncomfortably.
"Or the bedroom," You rub your eyes. "I think it'd be cuter in the bedroom."
"You kept my clothes?"
You blink at him owlishly. "I kept everything you ever had."
Komaeda doesn't know what he's supposed to feel when you actually pull out the chain that was originally around his neck. Komaeda returns home, supporting himself on the wall, pulling his shoes off, pausing at the sight of you in his sweater and chain.
"I swear this isn't-"
"Stay in it." Komaeda tosses his jacket to the side, stepping up to you, pressing his lips on your temple, smothering you in kisses. "Can I fuck you in that?"
"Yeah," You scrunch your nose as he kisses further down your neck, biting, tracing circles on the teeth marks, staring quietly. "God, you're so pretty."
You flush from his words, and he pulls the bottom of his shirt up, revealing your boobs. He pries your lips open, having you bite on the hem as he thumbs the bud of your tits, pinching it to get a reaction out of you. Your skin jumps as his lips close around the other bud, swirling his tongue around it. Your leg wobbles, and Komaeda has you sit, the tips of his hair tickling your chin as he continues his ministrations. Your fingers dig into the sheets, soft pants slipping past your lips as Komaeda takes your quiet moans as a sign of encouragement.
He pulls away, a string of saliva following him, and he blinks slowly at how your legs have bucked. You stare at him as he pulls away from your chest, deer caught in headlights, heart ringing in your ears. You don't know when he got so perceptive. The hem of the shirt is still between your teeth, and Komaeda pulls the cloth from you.
"Pretty angel, doing such a great job," He kisses you as a reward, lowering his head, pressing a hand to your thigh as he scrunches the shirt up to reveal your pussy. He pushes your legs open wider, pulling you closer to him, getting onto his stomach, pressing a light kiss to your clit before mumbling quietly. "itadakimasu," He delves in, sticking his tongue in first, making sure to savor your taste. Your thighs quiver, and he holds them apart as he continues, stopping you from suffocating him. You throw your head back, muffling the sounds from your mouth with your palm.
"Angell," Komaeda slurs, replacing his tongue with a finger. "please let me hear you..."
You move your hand slowly as Komaeda sits, hand reaching for the chain, pulling on it, forcing you to lurch forward, the collar cutting your breath off. You gasp as he does, whimpering as you feel Komaeda curl his finger in you, looking for the place you liked it best. You gasp, propping yourself onto your elbows to try and breathe. Your breath hitches as he slides a second finger in, your arms shaking.
"K-Ko," You gasp as he pulls on the chain again.
"Yes, angel?"
"I wanna cum," The coil in your stomach tightens as you tighten around Komaeda's fingers. Komaeda obliges, letting the chain go from his hand, pressing his thumb to your clit, drawing rapid circles. You cum with a cry, drenching his fingers, your legs shaking. You whimper as he pulls his fingers out and licks them. Your eyelids flutter, chest heaving for air.
"Can," Komaeda swallows slowly. "can you ride me?"
You nod slowly, waiting for Komaeda to strip and lie down. He makes a show for you, unbuttoning his shirt painfully slow, pulling his belt off, body weight resting on one side of his body, hips jutted out. You swallow the saliva threatening to spill from your lips. You climb over him, letting the cum from your orgasm lube him, positioning him slowly. You watch as Komaeda wraps his hand around the chain again, pulling lightly as he bottoms out in you. You pant, whimpering, the remnants of your orgasm making your walls still sensitive.
"So pretty for me," Komaeda pulls on the chain lightly. His shirt scratches and causes your body to itch, the fabric painfully uncomfortable. You remember why you didn't like it anymore. Well, as you start bouncing on his cock slowly, one hand on the chain and the other tangled in the sheets. You stare down at him as he pulls the collar, forcing your chest to his face, and you whimper as his lips latch onto your nipple, sucking ever so gently. You force your body weight onto your elbows, your bouncing turning erratic.
Komaeda helps you, thrusts matching your rhythm. You whimper as his other hand rests on your hip, drawing lazy circles as you feel your orgasm approach again. You gasp softly, biting your bottom lip harshly as you feel your orgasm approach again. Komaeda forces your chest to his face, letting go of the chain and moving his other hand to your ass. You cum on him with a cry as he bites on your nipple, the hickey bright red on your chest tightening on him like a vice. Your chest heaves as he chases his own orgasm, your legs shaking from overstimulation. You whine as he spills into you. Komaeda babbles incoherently as you collapse on top of him, pulling the shirt from over your head. The collar and chain remain around your neck, and Komaeda pulls you down to press a kiss to your cheek.
"You're so, so beautiful," Komaeda mumbles on your lips, pressing lazy kisses to your skin.
"I love you too."
Komaeda's anxiety charts as the wedding gets closer and closer. He finds himself staring at sharp objects for far too long and foods that he knows would be bad for him even longer. There's a certain sense of anxiety as he stares a little too long at dangerous items nearby, and you find yourself tracing circles on his skin and reminding him that it was fine. You didn't mind his luck cycle. Even if it rained on the big day, you could just run down the aisle with an umbrella.
You sit in your cabin, smiling as Hiyoko arranges your hair with a huff, complaining about how you had such nice hair but never took care of it. You laugh as she weaves flowers into your hair, and Sonia has you hold still as she does your makeup. Mahiru moves between cabins, snapping photos of both you and Komaeda. Ibuki arranges the music as Peko invites the few future foundation members to their seats. You don't know how you got here, really. Your heart causes your breathing to get anxious, and you grimace slowly.
"Hey," Sonia pauses, having you stare at her. "It'll be fine. No anxious thoughts. It's your wedding day."
You exhale as she has you breathe, and your shoulders relax.
"It looks like it's going to rain," Mikan mumbles. "Did we bring an umbrella?"
"I did!" Akane closes the umbrella, stepping into the room. "Wah, how pretty!"
"Thank you, Akane," You smile.
Komaeda's words serve true, rain pouring down on the day of the wedding, and you laugh as the tail of your dress stains with rainwater. You'll think of it as a fond memory. You know you will. It'll be fun to explain to people who ask why your dress is stained brown and say that you got married in the rain to the love of your life. It's a sense of acceptance. You blink at Komaeda as you get ready to walk down the aisle, and you decide to run. You're excited. Komaeda's dressed head to toe in white, and he looks ethereal. You'd love him forever, you decide. You ditch the umbrella, only stopping as you bump under his. It was big enough to fit the two of you.
"Would you like to swap shoes? Running in heels in the rain is a little..." Komaeda raises a leg to slip his shoe off before you stop him.
"I want to run in the rain, in heels, with the love of my life," You laugh, resting your hand on his bicep, leaning your head onto his shoulder.
Impostor gives the opening speech, and you grin happily as you open the letter you had written, holding a newly brought, clear umbrella.
"To Nagito Komaeda," You clear your throat carefully. "I landed in your lap in the blink of an eye, crashing into you on the street from above. It was comedic, it was strange, and it was new. I had never gotten hit by a white truck before, and I was nowhere expecting to end up in this world of all places. You're a fan favorite in my world, and the fact that I'm being blessed with an opportunity to marry you like this is incredible. It feels strange. It felt like just yesterday when I was asking you in a foreign language whether or not I could stay with you until I found a home, and now today we're getting married. I know you like to say that it's a blessing to marry me, but I think the real blessing was falling in love with you."
You pause to breathe, glancing at Komaeda, wiping his tears already.
"I was horrified when I saw the letter detailing your frontaltemporal lobe dementia. I was determined to find some way to fix it, whether it be through someone as obscure as the ultimate neurologist whom I had only heard of once or twice. I was blissfully in love with you as I had always been. I do not remember a moment when I haven't loved you to the moon and back." You swallow, tears welling in your eyes. "Even when you were nothing more than a mere servant under Monaca, I was desperate to do anything for you. I had forgotten that the tragedy was something that you would have despised had you found out I was an ultimate despair, but I was so desperate to love you and to show you how far my love went that I went insane."
Komaeda thanks Hinata as he takes the handkerchief, crying silently into it.
"But I knew that we would love each other. I knew that you and I would love like no other, and that the sun would die and the moon would break, but there would never be a moment where I wouldn't stop loving you because I couldn't stop loving you. You were as vital to my existence as any basic commodity was. I could wither and die like the flowers you picked for me at Hope's Peak and I would still love you desperately." You pause, collecting yourself. "Because you were just that important to me. You were something that I desperately, insanely wanted. You meant the world to me, and I was willing to let everyone else burn just so I could see you live."
You cough, trying to hold back tears. "And when we had fought, I was so desperate to leave because the only thing I knew how to do was to run away. Yet, I don't know why I stayed in that tower all night until the sun was peeking from the east. I don't know why I had held onto you so desperately as you had cried in my arms, but I'm so terribly elated that I had stayed, because I wouldn't be here if I had just ran away like I always did. I wouldn't have been in our room, staring at the ceilings and counting the stars in your eyes, watching you breathe peacefully, because I would have never been able to experience anything if I didn't stay with you. I read once that love was a choice," You exhale. "So my choice, in the simplest terms," You wipe a tear from your eye. "Is to stay by your side, for better or worse, for life or for death, and until the universe would forcibly tear my heart and soul and mind away from you, I will stay with you until all that is left of me is nothing, for I know that I would love you for all of my days, even if it decides to kill me. Because even if I'm the ultimate isekai victim in my next, life, you'll always be my husband, lover, and my home in a world that despises me so much."
Komaeda wipes his tears, eyes puffy, brows furrowed, slightly embarrassed at how much of a mess he probably looked. He coughs, waiting for his tears to calm before staring at his letter. He sniffs a little, opening the letter carefully, almost as if he were scared to break the wax. He adjusts the umbrella in his hand, and he opens the letter carefully. There are words written on the front and back.
"To my angel," Komaeda reads, adjusting his umbrella. "When you had first told me to write you a letter, I thought you were saying just to write down whatever thoughts I had."
You thank Sonia as she hands you a handkerchief.
"When I first met you, I thought I was insane." Komaeda laughs to himself. "I was just thrown out of the trash, a couple million dollars on a lottery ticket. I had the ticket in my pocket, and I remembered how each year, each terrible year, I had prayed at the shrines during visits that somehow, somewhere, there would be someone who would make living worth all the suffering I had to go through. I was so desperate to be in love and to have someone who cared about me to the point of destruction like my parents were with each other. I was dying for someone to love me, and as if the universe had heard my prayer that built up over the years, you appeared. You fell from the sky, and for that short moment in my life, I was starstruck at the sight of you." Komaeda sniffs. "I was painfully in love with you. You, who had spoken barely any Japanese upon meeting me, and you who had tried drawing a white truck killing you, I was in love with you. You were so charming in my eyes. I didn't think of a day where I would have to live without you."
Komaeda wipes his tears again, coughing quietly. "I had fallen in love with you so naturally that by the time I was a remnant of despair like you had predicted, I thought that the only way to cause despair was through the death of you, but my consciousness couldn't allow it. I was frail, broken, shattered, so I thought the best sort of despair would have been to work you to the bone and have you fall out of love with me. I failed. I'm glad I failed." Komaeda sniffs, glancing at you in tears, crying into the handkerchief, hiccuping.
"And during that killing game, I died with you." Komaeda laughs airily. "I thought you would surely leave me and try to survive. I had given you a gas mask, yet you stabbed yourself to make sure that my plan would go along, and the two of us were gone. Dead. You were in a coma because I had forced you into one before leaving for the island, and I was in a coma because I had prayed and prayed for a world where everything was together and in one piece. I wanted a world where the two of us could live without the tragedy. A world where we were all classmates, and Chiaki was still alive. To me, it was a world where the two of us were in love and my luck wasn't killing anyone. I woke up and cried. I had to be in a world with you in it, so I thought it'd be chance that my luck would save you. I'm glad it did."
Komaeda turns the paper.
"I love you to the moon and back, and I love you until the sun burns out and the moon dies from heartbreak. My life is supposed to be a mosaic of everyone I've loved, but instead, it's just a painting of you. From start to finish, from the moment we met to the moment we'll die, everything will be influenced by you and you alone. I'll fly you to the moon and burn from the sun just so that you could live without worry. And when I wake up in the morning, I'll hide you from the sun's rays burning your eyes and kiss you until you grow tired of me. I'll do anything and everything so that you'll know how much I love you, because I finally, finally, found the person that I wake up each morning, smiling all silly at because of how much I love you." Komaeda exhales shakily. "So this is my vow to love you until the world shatters and my soul can't reincarnate with you anymore. Know that no matter how much the world will kill me, I'll never leave or break you. I love you, my angel, my world, my heart, and my home."
You wipe your tears quietly, and Souda hands the two of you the rings. Komaeda slips it onto your ring finger, pausing to stare at it. You hold his ring, pausing when you notice the tears pricking the corner of his eyes. You reach to wipe the tears, wiping his tears with your handkerchief as he sniffs quietly. He mumbles a quiet apology, lifting his hand so that you can put his ring on. He wipes his tears as you wait for his vision to clear a little so that he could look at you.
You slip the ring on, a stupid smile on your face, the smile of a lovesick fool.
Impostor starts again. The moment you think you've been waiting for your entire life. Your heart rings in your head, and you can almost hear Komaeda's heart beating in his chest.
"You may now kiss theâ"
You feel bad for interrupting Impostor, but as you press your lips to Komaeda, throwing your arms around him in glee, the umbrella falling to the side as Komaeda's caught off guard, you decide it's fine. Though, Komaeda doesn't complain as the familiar feeling of your lips on his causes him to relax into your arms, hands wrapping around your waist instinctively. His lashes flutter as he tilts his neck to get more comfortable, and the rain soaks his hair. He might catch a cold from this, but he supposes he would only get married once. It didn't matter how his luck cycle would affect him.
The rain ceases over your head, and you pout when you pull away. "I wanted to run in the rain with you."
"It'll rain later," Komaeda hums. "We can run when it's later at night. Just the two of us"
You blink slowly, staring at Komaeda as you pause.
"I love you."
"I love you too."
pairing: choi beomgyu x fem!reader
genre: angst, smut, ex-bestfriends to lovers, ex bff!beomgyu, musician!beomgyu, mutual (unknown) pining, fluff if you squint, non-idol!au, alcohol/drinking
synopsis: two years ago, you admitted to yourself that you were in love with your bestfriend beomgyu. two years ago, you and your bestfriend beomgyu stopped being bestfriends. now heâs an up and coming musician and you see his face and hear his music almost everywhere in your local city; not knowing that the songs he writes are about you.
warnings: tipsy sex (consensual), soft sex basically, lots of yearning, unprotected sex (wrap it then tap it), oral (f. rec), kinda service top!beomgyu, slight overstimulation (m. rec), beomgyu is really just catering to y/n, some hair pulling (m. rec), multiple orgasms, creampie, petnames (baby), aftercare
word count: 9.3kâv-day event masterlistâmasterlist
a/n: based off donât delete the kisses by wolf alice and part three of my v-day event! i didnât mean for this to be 9.3k omg. be glad i didnât have the party hosted by jackson wang lmao.. sorry if the lyrics are kinda bad i am nawt a songwriter (thereâs no like certain tune to them so reading them regularly is fine)! this beomgyu is the one i was imagining in this (heâs sooo fucking pretty). i hope you enjoy! âĄ
two years ago, you admitted to yourself that you were in love with your bestfriend beomgyu.
it was a jarring realization; realizing that youâve been harboring these slowly growing feelings for him all this time. it was as if one day the house was empty and the next all of the furniture and decorations were displayed and put up. like beomgyu had lived in the recesses of your mind all this time and youâve never even known.
your acceptance was gradual, mainly because you had buried yourself in your studies along with beomgyu so you didnât spend as much time together as you both would have wanted. he was studying music, his passion since before youâve even known him, and you were studying writing. beomgyu was working on his debut ep and you were working on your debut novel.
you had noticed it when you started to realize how much the love interest in your novel reminded you of him. and then how much of your love interest actually was beomgyu, down to similarities in their physical description. it was a moment that beomgyu himself was present for, surprisingly.
beomgyu was sitting on your couch, strumming chords lightly and humming softly to himself as he polished up one of the songs he was writing. you were in the corner of the room at your desk, proofreading the chapter you had just written. a gasp had left your lips as you stared wide eyed at the bright white screen in front of you.
the strumming abruptly stopped as beomgyu turned to you, âwhat is it?â you bit down on your bottom lip as you read the paragraph over and over again. you saw him shift in the corner of your eye and knew he was about to come and see for himself. quickly, you changed the tab to the one that held your outline. âitâs nothing,â you turned, smiling over at him. âjust realized that i accidentally created a huge plot holeâŠâ beomgyu chuckled before returning back to his song.
that night, you had read over everything youâve written so far in a flurry. beomgyu was everywhere in your novel. from the main character to the side characters to the love interest. there was no escaping him.
âshit,â you muttered as you trailed a hand down your face, throwing your laptop onto your bed as you got up to get a drink from the kitchen. tiptoeing past beomgyuâs room in your shared apartment, you reached the kitchen quietly, hopeful that you didnât somehow wake him.
turns out that was pointless since beomgyu was leaning against the counter, eyes trained on you. you jumped and threw a hand against your chest. âwhy arenât you asleep?!â you whisper-yelled, even though there was no need since it was only the two of you in the apartment. beomgyu grinned, putting the cup he was holding to his lips, âwhy arenât you?â he spoke softly as well and you walked over to join him.
beomgyu shined hazily in the orange stove light and you took a sip from the glass of alcohol you poured as you looked at him. the two of you stood there for a moment, quietly taking in each otherâs presence.
âso why are you awake? itâs almost four in the morning,â beomgyu asked quietly as he broke the silence. you looked towards the living room and took another sip from your glass. âi was proofreading⊠you?â you asked, looking back to him. âsongwriting,â beomgyu responded. you hummed, nodding a little. âwanna hear what i have so far?â he then asked. you nodded more and he led you to his room.
beomgyuâs laptop was open on his bed, all kinds of cords connected to it. his guitar was strewn across it, like he had tossed it on his bed haphazardly in frustration. beomgyu picked the guitar up and sat it back on itâs stand near the wall. sitting on his bed, he patted the spot next to him so you could join. then, he put the headphones over your head and pressed play on his laptop.
music traveled through your ears. it was just the instrumental, but already you could tell how beautiful the song was gonna be. you looked over at him, a proud smile on your face when suddenly you heard his voice. it was only soft background vocals, the ones that you could barely make out, but it sounded heavenly. when the music ended, your smile stretched from ear to ear and you raised your hands to cover it. âthat was beautiful, beomgyu! seriously!â
he gave you an unsure look, âis it? iâm not really sure about it. i feel like it might mess with the flow of the epâŠâ you shook your head rapidly, the headphones almost coming off. âno you have to keep it, itâs amazing! itâs gonna be even better once you add your voice.â
beomgyu beamed as he took in your words. âi gotta hear it again,â you grinned, pressing play on the laptop. you faintly heard beomgyuâs laugh behind the music.
you would give anything for all of your nightsâor early morningsâto be exactly like this. the two of you here together, side by side. laughing together and sharing your passions together. to stay with beomgyu until the very end.
two years ago, you and your bestfriend beomgyu stopped being bestfriends.
just like you admitting and realizing your feelings for him, it was sudden. as sudden as storm clouds slowly passing over the sky and the fury of rain could be. it was late morning and the two of you were on your couch; beomgyuâs guitar in his lap and you sitting next to him as he strummed. he was playing one of the finished songs he had written, the one he had written for you. beomgyu had called it âgraze.â
âher hair glowed in the sunlight as she grazed past me; like a leaf on a tree branch of a tree iâll never see. over the canopy, itâs each other that we always seem to miss. when the darkness seals me in itâs cold maze, she sends me her remembrances in the form of a kiss,â you sung the lyrics together. beomgyu smiled warmly at you.
beomgyu had given you some insight into the lyrics he had written. the first part, âher hair glowed in the sunlight as she grazed past me; like a leaf on a tree branch of a tree iâll never see. over the canopy, itâs each other that we always seem to miss,â was about the day you had first spoken. it was senior year of highschool and the two of you were paired together on a project. you were meeting somewhere to work on it, but you accidentally walked past the meeting place, completely passing by beomgyu unaware.
the next part, âwhen the darkness seals me in itâs cold maze, she sends me her remembrances in the form of a kiss,â is when the two of you had gotten close; close enough to share secrets and comfort each other through the thoughts they consumed. everytime the two of you texted, you would end the conversation off with an âxxx.â kisses. it had become your thing with beomgyu, so much so that he wrote it into his song.
when the song had ended, beomgyu suddenly perked up. âlet me show you the song iâve been working on! the one i showed you the other day,â he exclaimed. he started strumming chords, humming softly as he began the song. âi only have, like, one lyric for it right now,â he interjected as he continued strumming.
âtoo powerful to overtake, oh, youâve grown all over my mindâŠâ beomgyu sang to the tune of his guitar. your smile faltered, but you managed to put it back in tact as beomgyu glanced up from his guitar to ask for your opinion. it was a love song he was writing. a love song for someone that wasnât you.
âitâs beautiful, like all of your songs are. i like the new addition! how long have you been working on it?â you smiled, though it didnât quite reach your eyes. beomgyu began to blush as he turned to set his guitar aside, moving his hair over his ears. the tips of them were red. âfor a little bit now. i just canât seem to find the words of the feelings i want to convey,â he replied.
your glass heart shattered, itâs pieces making its way into your bloodstream. piercing pieces dug into beomgyuâs skin. âwhoâs the lucky person?â you asked, swallowing hard. he turned back to you and smirked. âjust someone iâve known for a while... i think weâre really starting to hit it off!â
after that day, you started to distance yourself from beomgyu. at first, it was only your feelings. limiting the amount of times you touched in any way or adding space between your bodies when you were near each other. then, it was almost as if the two of you were strangers living in the same place.
beomgyu had definitely noticed. you could feel his lingering look at the back of your neck. hear his questions in the air that hangs between you. but your feelings just wouldnât go away. maybe they were right when they said that distance makes the heart grow fonder.
you locked yourself in your room, working on and rewriting your book over and over again. tryingâand failing horriblyâto remove beomgyu from the caverns of it. nothing worked, but you were desperate.
one day, beomgyu was playing his guitar a little too loud while you were in your room writing. usually, this wouldnât be a problem at all. beomgyu always made sure not to be too noisy when you were writing, even though you always told him how much it helped you to have the background music. but this time, this time was different.
you were frustrated, agitated, still deep in love, and still deep in the great unreciprocated. you had flung your door open and stormed into the living room where he was playing and yelled at him to stop.
beomgyu looked up at you with wide, shocked eyes. it was dead silent for a moment, not even the sound of your breathing was heard. too late you realized what you had done. silently, beomgyu collected his things and made his way to his room, not sparing you a single glance or even a murmur. you watched him, an apology, an excuse on your lips.
the next day after you came home from researching at the library, you found a single note from him that was left on the kitchen counter. âi canât live here with a stranger anymore,â was all it said. finally, you noticed how empty the apartment looked. how empty it looked for a while now. beomgyu was gone, and it was all your fault.
today, you could barely walk the streets of your city without seeing his face or hearing his music.
âUP AND COMING!â the articleâs title had read as they delved into an interview with your former best friend. you pushed the laptop away, even after these two years apart you couldnât face him. not even through a screen. couldnât face how you tore your friendship apart because you couldnât control your own feelings. maybe love just wasnât meant for you.
you heard a sigh from next to you. âjust read it!â your friend, yeonjun, drawled. âyouâre mentioned.â you let out a sigh yourself with a roll of your eyes as you grabbed the laptop. âif iâm mentioned, itâs not gonna be something good.â
you scrolled down the article until you got to the part where beomgyu got interviewed. most of the questions were about his debut album and upcoming tour. you havenât listened to any of his songs since he released his ep. hearing his voice was just too much. your eyes stopped on a question that mentioned one of the songs from his debut ep; your song.
Q. one of your more, if not most, popular song is a song called âgraze.â can you give us some input into what the song is about? how you came up with it? BEOMGYU: i actually had written the song for someone who i was very close to at the time. originally, the song was about the dynamics of our friendship. but as things change, so did the meaning of the lyrics. speaking of the lyrics, when i wrote the song i had come up with them first and the rest just kinda flowed after that. it was the first song that i had finished for my ep, and the one i was most proud of. iâm really happy that a lot of people enjoy the song!
you inhaled sharply at his answer. âbut as things change, so did the meaning of the lyrics.â you werenât expecting him to hold fondness for you after everything, after all this time, but his response did sting.
Q. you mentioned how the meaning of the song lyrics changed, does that tie into the title of the song? was âgrazeâ a double meaning this whole time? BEOMGYU: i guess you could say that! there wasnât a double meaning at the beginning, but alas⊠to graze means to be scraped lightly in passing, to break the surface of the skin. but it also means to touch, to caress. to slightly damage or to gently touch.
Q. it also means to take in small quantities at frequent, did you know that? BEOMGYU: i didnât! see how meanings can change!
blinking the tears brimming in the corner of your eyes away, you look back over to yeonjun. he looked at you with eyebrows raised and you shrugged at him. what did he want you to say? that you missed him? you did. that you wish things were different between the two of you? you do. what is that going to change?
âhe mentioned the song he wrote! for you!â yeonjun exclaimed. you shrugged again, âhe mentioned the song he wrote for someone he used to be close with. like he said, things change.â yeonjun groaned as he fell into the pillows on your bed.
shortly after beomgyu had moved out, you moved into a smaller, one bedroom apartment. it was eating away at you inside looking at how empty and lifeless your apartment you had shared with beomgyu looked. you couldnât take how everywhere you looked, a memory of the two of you followed.
âheâs having a show at the arena downtown. weâre going,â yeonjun stated. your eyes widened and you furiously shook your head. âno⊠no i canât.â two years and you crossed the street if there was a poster of him up next to the sidewalk. two years and you went everywhere with headphones, music blasting in your ears to cover his playing softly throughout the city. you couldnât see him face to face. couldnât watch as his smile faltered and his eyes lost their emotion as he looked at you.
yeonjun reached into his pocket and pulled out two tickets, âitâs too late, i already got the tickets. i canât watch anymore as the two of you avoid each other. itâs been two years and not once have i seen the both of you in the same room let alone on the same block.â you put your face into your hands as you leaned over onto the bed, groaning loudly.
somehow you forgot that beomgyu and yeonjun were also friends. close friends at that. the two of them were friends before you and beomgyu were. you wanted to curse at the sky. âand donât even try to find some way out of it either. i will drag you there kicking and screaming if i have to.â yeonjun added.
âbut i have to finish writing my boââ you started before yeonjun swiftly cut you off. âitâs this weekend, so you have the whole week to prepare yourself.â
when you were alone that night in the comforting isolation of your bedroom, you let yourself scroll through your old messages with beomgyu. let your eyes wander over the âxxxâ at the end of your messages. you fingers moved on their own as they began typing out a message.
old apologies, old excuses. you had the nerve to add âxxxâ at the end like the two of you were still who you once used to be. you deleted the kisses at the end, deleted the message altogether. itâs not that you would ever send it anyways.
you thought about how your life would be if you and beomgyu werenât strangers now. if you were more than best friends, getting to know each other again. you imagined late nights of you taking him out to bars in celebration of his new releases. pressing proud kisses to his lips as the alcohol and your love warmed the both of your bodies. shaking your head to yourself, you pushed the thoughts away. no use in daydreaming.
the damning beat of your heart got louder and louder the closer you and yeonjun got to the arena. the closer and closer you got to beomgyu. at the rate your heart was going, the sheer loudness would create a guilty beat for everyone to sing along to.
you handed in your tickets and made your way to the floor. when you read the tickets and saw that they were for the floor, you almost killed yeonjun. you thought you could be sly and sit somewhere in the seats, somewhere where beomgyu wouldnât have a high possibility of seeing you. you were wrong.
yeonjun grabbed your wrist and pulled you close to the stage. when he tried to pull you right up against the barricade, you pulled away from him and he sighed. the two of you settled close to the stage, but not so close that youâd be touching noses with beomgyu. a compromise.
the lights had dimmed and the crowd had filed in until it was jam packed in the arena. your heart couldnât help but swell with pride. he did it, he really did. he achieved the one thing he wanted the most, and you couldnât be prouder of him for it.
the band came on stage and the crowd erupted with cheers and screams from all around you. you looked over to yeonjun, who was cheering along with them. you laughed, the sound being covered, but still there nonetheless. everything only got louder when beomgyu stepped onto the stage. you swear the girl next to you almost passed out.
when you saw him, the spotlight illuminating himâmaking him look like all of the stars in the sky, it was as if it was only the two of you in the room. the crowd of people around you faded and your breath hitched when he started to look over the crowd with a big warm smile. your face heated and you looked away, hiding so he wouldnât see you. itâs been a while since youâve done that.
what were you doing here? what was yeonjun thinking? that he would see you in the crowd and everything would fall into place? that he would call your name and the crowd would part as you made your way to the stage? that heâd take your hand and kiss you in front of everyone, in front of the whole world to see? what a stupid thought.
you wanted to leave but you were trapped from all sides. beomgyu sat on the chair that was placed in the center of the stage, his one and only guitar on his knee that youâve become so accustomed to. âhow is everyone doing tonight? well, i hope!â he said, strumming the strings of his guitar lightly. the crowd erupted again, words barely audible.
shaking your head, you grabbed yeonjunâs arm. âi can't do this, yeonjun. i want to go home.â he turned to you with furrowed eyebrows of worry. the girl next to you gave you an ear to ear smile, âi know right? isnât he just so dreamy!â in turn, you gave her a barely disguised grimace and turned back to yeonjun. yeonjun laughed at your reaction, âget over it! let him sing to you! weâre staying.â he turned back to the stage and you realized that beomgyu had already began playing a song.
not just any song, the song that he wrote for you. he was singing âgraze.â yeonjun smirked at you and youâve realized youâve fallen into his trap. vaguely, you remembered that beomgyu always started out his shows with the song he had written for you. you wanted to use his guitar to bash your head in.
âher hair glowed in the sunlight as she grazed past me; like a leaf on a tree branch of a tree iâll never see. over the canopy, itâs each other that we always seem to miss. when the darkness seals me in itâs cold maze, she sends me her remembrances in the form of a kiss,â beomgyu sang softly to the tune of his guitar. the live band behind him made the song more layered, in a way you havenât heard since youâve first heard the finished song.
âunder newborn stars, we bear witness, we watched it all begin. i feel the heat of mars, my worn guitar, like her fingers against my skin,â beomgyu continued the song, the crowd singing along with him. you felt glassy tears in your eyes, threatening to fall. you couldnât open your mouth to sing, not after all of the circumstances, so your heart sang for you. it was quiet, left only for the empty cathedrals of your ribs to echo back to you.
once he stopped singing, the music continued for a moment, letting everyone take in the song. beomgyu closed his eyes against the bright lights, his hands resting on the edge of his guitar. just as the song ended he opened them, an emotion you couldnât quite make out in his eyes.
ânow, for this next one, it took me a long time to write. two years in fact,â beomgyu spoke as he looked around at the crowd, a slight laugh in his tone. his eyes had just missed yours on his journey and you reeled back slightly in shock, looking up at him with wide eyes. âi just couldnât seem to find the words to the feelings i wanted to convey. but luckily for you all, i managed to find them,â beomgyu smiled as he adjusted his guitar. âthis oneâs called âtattoos on strangers.ââ
those words sounded strangely familiar. out of the corner of your eye, you saw yeonjun look over at you as the crowd cheered. you couldnât even move to look back at him, to ask why he was staring. you were entirely focused on beomgyu. on the way he looked around the crowd with twinkling love in his eyes. the way he fiddled with his guitar like he was antsy to let the music flow out of him. it entranced you, dazzled you, entrapped you.
beomgyu inhaled sharply, the sound catching in the mic in front of him, as he strummed the chords of one of his songs youâve never heard before. âweâre two moths to a burning flame; they call us icarus. now all thatâs left between our bodies is the sinking bitterness. our eyes are on the sky, the lies we tell each other are to blame.â you gasped at how heavenly he sounded. at the melodic symphonies he was creating. at how familiar yet so unfamiliar the song sounded to you.
there was a beat as the live band picked up volume. âweâre waltzing together, weâve gone too far. but we canât help ourselves, weâre sinful, weâre brand new burning stars. gravity is starting to pull us closer and closer, you say itâs starting to lead to our demise. but donât worry, baby, our silenceâthe heaviness between us, will be the disguise,â beomgyu continued. his eyes were squeezed shut as he sang. it made you wonder who he intended the song to be for if he was reacting this way.
âthereâs no need to apologize, weâve witnessed this before, i know your true name. like the ink of a tattoo, you linger, you graze the recesses of my brain. too powerful to overtake, oh, youâve grown all over my mind. donât delete the kisses at the end, just kiss me insteadâjust this one time,â beomgyu sang as the song came to an end. suddenly it was as if a light switch lit up the dark room in your brain, a certain lyric ringing bells inside.
âtoo powerful to overtake, oh, youâve grown all over my mind,â you understood why the song sounded familiar to you. it was the song beomgyu was working on right before the two of you stopped being bestfriends. another thought hit you so hard that you stumbled back into the person behind you and yeonjun gave you another worried look. you stared back at him, eyes wide open.
two lyrics stood out to you, âlike the ink of a tattoo, you linger, you graze the recesses of my brain,â and âdonât delete the kisses at the end, just kiss me insteadâjust this one time.â you turned to look back up at beomgyu, just as he started singing another song. his eyes were traveling the crowd and at that moment, his eyes connected with yours. they widened and he started to blink rapidly for a second, like he couldnât believe that you were looking at him.
at the same time, both of your eyes traveled to yeonjun, who in turn gave a sheepish smile. he set the two of you up. desperately you wanted to leave, but yeonjunâs hand around your wrist and the crowd wouldnât let you.
âgrazeâ, you knew for a fact was for you, but âtattoos on strangersâ? there was no denying that he wrote the song about you, down to the referencing lyrics. down to the âdonât delete the kisses at the end.â oh god, you thought, oh god. this whole time⊠this whole time, he was singing about you. he was singing about you when you thought he was singing about someone else and you ruined it. you ruined everything.
suddenly, it was getting hard to breathe with everyone around you and with beomgyuâs eyes on you. he tried hard to make it look like he wasnât singling you out, but every couple seconds his eyes would lock on you again. you had no choice but to sit and endure. endure his stare, the slight wildness in his look. endure all the songs from his debut album that you never heard; all of which were about you. all of them. endure the way his heart called out to yours, echoing through his songs, and the way yours called back.
your eyes connect once moreâjust for the briefest of momentsâbefore you looked away, shyness taking over. your faceâno, your whole bodyâfelt like it was on fire. just like a brand new burning star. you felt like all eyes were on you, when in reality all eyes were on him.
finally, you looked up again as he announced the last song in the setlistââforethought.â your eyes meet just as he sings, his eyes only on you, âoh, i hear her voice in the wind sometimes. has she given me any thought? i go back to the pastimesâlike wind chimes, itâs not all for naught. my wet knees in the winter, itâs my hopeful crime, itâs my savior... itâs my desperate prayer, i scream out her name into the dying natureâit leads me out the maze so iâm with her. itâs a stranded forethought.â you feel tears well up into your eyes and you see tears well up in beomgyuâs too, hidden by the bright lights to the crowd, but not to you. never to you.
after a moment, he repeats with eyes closed in a silent plea, âdonât linger, donât linger, light bringer, donât linger. stay with meâsend me your remembrances. please, donât delete those kisses. donât linger, light bringer. donât linger.â the tears fall freely from your eyes at the way his voice softly echoes. echoes just like wind chimes in the blowing wind. you feel yeonjun pull you into a hug as a sob escapes your lips.
you donât register the concert ending, the crowd getting smaller and smaller until thereâs only a few stragglers. you move numbly as yeonjun pulls you along behind him. itâs not until you hear a familiar voice, beomgyuâs voice, that you suddenly come back to life.
yeonjun has taken you backstage. the two of you were making your way over to where beomgyu was standing, talking to someone you didnât recognize, as he packed up his guitar. again, your eyes met, and you pulled your wrist from yeonjunâs grasp. you turned, wild eyes scanning for an exit as your feet moved without needing your input. ây/n, wait!â you heard voices from behind you. you kept going, the fear pushing you forwards faster.
it wasnât until you were in front of the night bus, voices behind you as you pushed whatever money you had into the bus driver's hands, that you finally felt like you could breathe. the doors closed and the bus began moving as beomgyu and yeonjun ran up waving frantically. the bus kept moving. you looked through the window, terrified wide eyes reflecting back to you in the glass, at their fading figures. at beomgyuâs dejected eyes and yeonjunâs sorrowful ones. at the breaking of your heart, once again.
sighing heavily to yourself, you faced the front of the bus. what has gotten into you? why would you let yourself think that beomgyu would wait for you after these two long years? it was clear to you that what happened at that concert was a goodbye. and maybe you were okay with that. maybe you didnât mind. you wiped the tears from your cheeks. itâs okay, youâve always worked better on your own anyways. without the constant tingling of growing feelings, without the heavy stares that hold so much, without the newborn starsâwithout beomgyu.
when you get home, you waste no time with the alcohol you have. turning your phone off, locking all your doors and shutting all the curtains. you lay on your bed, drunk out of your mind looking up at the ceiling as you think, what if loveâs not meant for me?
five days ago, you went to your ex-bestfriendâs concert and listened as he poured his heart out onto the stage for you; while you ran away from him like the echo of a wind chime in the wind.
beomgyu has taken over your mind. has soared through the mountains of your thoughts and settled gently in the valleys of your desires. lingered in the lakes and puddles and the big vast ocean of your memories. all youâve been thinking about since the concert was him. heâs completely consumed you.
you had scrolled up and down your messages together, laughing at old jokes and shedding tears at old memories. retelling the jokes he made to yourself and pretending that they were yours to begin with as a permanent smile etched itself onto your features.
maybe this all was a sign. a sign that you should stop hiding in the four walls of your bedroom. a sign that you should find some way to contact beomgyu, rekindle the friendship you once used to have and maybe fan the flames of something greater. you wanted to scream from the rooftops about how much you loved beomgyu. tell the whole world about how he makes you feel and every little thing he does that just fills you with so much warmth.
you were scrolling through the photo album you still had of the two of you. at your silly faces and candid moments. you couldnât wipe the smile from your face if you wanted to. you felt like a teenage girl, giggling softly as she wrote her crushes name in hearts all over her notebooks. wide smile as she wrote in her diary about how much her crush rocked her world. you didnât care, you couldnât help it. beomgyu didâhe really didâmake you feel this way. heâs turned your whole world upside down.
electricity flowed through you until you were so antsy and electric that you just had to do something before it drove you insane. you needed to tell beomgyu, to let whatever was between the two of you happen. needed to have him around you again after these two long years, even if just briefly. god, you felt like such a romantic cliché, but you felt alive.
opening your phone, you finally replied to all of the messages that yeonjun had sent you. they spanned from worried to disappointed to a resigned sadness. you only sent him one message in response:
you: is he still here?
you held your breath, mentally smacking yourself for not looking up beomgyuâs tour dates beforehand. mentally smacking yourself for not garnering the courage earlier. how stupid you were. your phone dinged from yeonjunâs reply:
jjunie: party tonight at 11:30pm. iâll pick you up around 11. be ready.
breathing out a sigh of relief you looked at the clock. it was already 10pm. you raided your closet for your best looking outfit, throwing it on as you ran to your bathroom to put makeup on. you wanted to look your absolute best.
11pm couldnât come fast enough. you were waiting by the door when yeonjun had knocked, him barely getting his second knock in before you flung the door wide open. âis it too late?â you asked him desperately, standing limply in the doorframe. yeonjun just chuckled at you and grabbed your wrist, leading you to his car, ânever. not for the two of you.â
on the way over, yeonjun told you how the party was thrown by some big celebrity you never heard of and how beomgyu got the two of you invites. it was for such a good start on his sold out tour and debut album. âlike, everyone is gonna be there,â yeonjun said to you as he drove around to find a parking space.
once you found somewhere to park, you and yeonjun made your way to the venue where the party was being held. you passed through all kinds of security until you were faced with blasting music in your ears and bodies dancing everywhere. holding tightly onto yeonjun to not get lost, the two of you scanned the crowd.
âdo you want to get a drink?â yeonjun yelled over the music to you. you nodded and he led you through the crowd to where the bar was. the two of you got something and drank them silently by the bar. you felt bad for keeping yeonjun tied to you, so you yelled over the music to him, âyou can go and mingle! iâll be fine over here by myself!â he leaned towards you, furrowing his brows. âare you sure?â he asked and you nodded.
yeonjun made his way through the crowd, turning his charm on as he talked to various people. you stayed at the bar, sipping on various drinks until you felt very tipsy. your eyes scanned the crowd, looking for beomgyu, every minute or so.
thatâs when you saw him. he was across the room, holding a glass of something and talking to a group of people, when his eyes drifted and just happened to meet yours. beomgyu rendered you completely speechless. you got a good look at him, not being able to do so that well from his place on the stage, and took in how much heâs changed in the past two years.
beomgyuâs short brown hair was now dark, tinged blue in the low scattered overhead lights. the back of it touched the nape of his neck and the front fell over his eyes and ears. he looked absolutely beautiful, even more beautiful than you remember him being. his eyes widened at seeing you, making the natural liner of his eyes stand out.
suddenly, just like at the concert, it felt like it was only the two of you in the room. his eyes widened at seeing you again, his mouth opening slightly. without knowing it, the two of you gravitated towards each other. then you were face to face, standing in front of each other in the flesh. you couldnât believe it.
you both said each otherâs names at the same time, letting out a nervous laugh after. he motioned for you to continue and you swallowed hard. you were thankful that you were tipsy, that the alcohol was smoothing your nerves, because you definitely wouldnât be standing in front of beomgyu right now if you werenât.
âbeomieâŠâ you trailed before correcting yourself, you didnât want to pretend to know him like you use to after two years. âbeomgyu⊠thereâs no excuse. no apology even sincere enoughââ beomgyu had cut you off, ây/nie, you donât have to apologize.â
you shook your head. you knew that you didnât, that he had already forgiven you and moved past it. hell, he wrote a song about it. but you had to. you had to apologize in at least some way. âno, i do,â you stated. âi shouldnât have let us drift away, shouldnât have let us become strangers. i shouldnât have pushed you away. you were my bestfriend and i was scared. i like you so much, so much that you enveloped me completely. my mind, my book, my life⊠everything.â
you inhaled deeply, looking longingly into beomgyuâs eyes like you had wanted to do now for so long. âall i thought about was you. all i think about is you. and i miss you. i missed you so much, beomgyu. i love you. iâve always loved youââ beomgyu sat his glass on the nearby table as you spoke, then cupped your face gently with both of his hands and collided his lips to yours in a passionate kiss to cut you off. it told you everything he was feeling, everything heâs felt for you for who knows how long now. you felt his song lyrics on your lips. felt how every last lyric was written for you, every melody. every atom of your being colliding with every atom of his and creating a beautiful newborn star.
when he pulled away, he pulled you into a desperate and tight hug. he held you so tight it was as if he thought you were a bird that would fly away. you couldnât blame him, you kind of were. âi donât think i need to tell you how much i love you, but i will. iâll sing it in your ear softly and scream it at the top of my lungs for all the stars to witness, y/n. i love you,â beomgyu murmured into the crook of your neck.
you took his hand and led him out the venue. when you suddenly remembered that yeonjun took you here, beomgyu chuckled as he took you to his car. in the warm glow of your city at night, you pointed to various street signs and turns as beomgyu drove to your apartment.
inside your apartment, the two of you couldnât keep your mouths off each other. the wantingâthe needâlifting you up to cloud nine and making you dizzy. when you both somehow got to your bedroom, you were breathless and hot to the touch.
beomgyu had pulled away from you. âis this okay?â he asked, looking into your eyes. you saw the desire inside of them. you nodded, âyes, just please donât stop kissing me.â and he obliged, his lips on yours again.
one by one, articles of clothing came off. there was brief awkwardness, the hem of your dress getting caught on the earrings you were wearing and the button of his pants refusing to come undone. it all was alright in the end when the two of you were laying on your bed, you only in your bra and panties and him only in his boxers, his huge bulge pressing into your thigh as he hovered above you.
you were growing needy, the alcohol edging you onwards. âbeomgyu⊠i need you inside me,â you whimpered against his mouth as his hard boner rubbed against you. he hummed, lips moving to your neck, causing you to moan. âi need you to fuck meâŠâ you breathed out. beomgyu pulled away with the slightest upturn of his lips.
he sat you up so that you were now straddling his lap as he reached behind you and unclasped your bra. ânext timeâŠâ beomgyu murmured. ânext time iâll fuck you. but not tonight. tonight⊠we stop being strangers.â you shivered slightly at your already hardened nipples being exposed to the cool air. shivering more when beomgyuâs wet tongue circled them.
âis that okay?â beomgyu asked, staring into your eyes as he waited for your response. you nodded, unintentionally grinding against him, and moaned out, âyes.â his fingers had gripped your bare waist at the contact and his eyes shut tightly for a brief moment. ânext time⊠i promise you. let me get to know your body again.â
and get to know your body, he did. beomgyu laid you back down gently and then pulled off your panties slowly while staring down at you, eyes caressing every inch of you. you felt yourself getting wetter by the second, gripping the blankets to keep yourself from pulling him to you.
beomgyu pressed his lips to yours once more as he spread your legs apart. he pressed open mouthed kisses to your skin as he moved farther and farther down your body, looking up at you the entire time. you jolted slightly when he pressed kisses to the inside of your thighs. âyouâre so breathtaking, even more than before,â beomgyu spoke, trailing kisses up to your knee. he paused for a second, âi missed you so much, y/n.â
his tongue then swirled around your clit and your back arched off the bed, your hands finding their way into his pretty hair. beomgyu groaned, pulling away from your core with a wet mouth, as you pulled at it. just as quickly, he was back at it, making you moan for him as he devoured you. you creating pretty harmonies for him.
âfuckâŠâ beomgyu said lowly. you could see how hard his cock was in his boxers and it made you need him even more. he then pushed two fingers into you, them slipping in easily with how wet you were for him. beomgyu pulled you up from the bed as he continued pushing his fingers in and out of you, tipping your head back and capturing your lips in a sweet and slow kiss. your tongues danced together, waltz together as you clenched around his fingers.
pulling away, you buried your face in his neck as you whimpered his name. âcum for me, baby,â beomgyu said in your ear softly. you didnât need to be told twice, your warm release spreading all over his fingers.
you wrapped your arms around his neck, âi-i need you, please⊠yourâyour fingers arenât e-enough.â beomgyu chuckled as he nodded. you released your hold on him so he could take off his boxes, his long and hard cock on full display for you. you used to dream of moments like these.
beomgyu looked at you, asking silently if you were ready. in response, you shakily got to your knees. he lined himself up with your entrance and slowly, you slid down onto him. the both of you gasped at the feeling, moans joining together in a beautiful song as you moved up and down on his cock.
you were giving each other sloppy and needy kisses, beomgyu wrapping his arms around you to pull you closer as he thrusted up into your pussy. you gasped against his lips, your hands laying to rest against his chest. he whimpered as he continued thrusting, âyou feel soâso good. so good, baby. do you f-feel good?â
âyâoh⊠it feels s-so good,â you managed out. you could feel the knot in your stomach tighten with each thrust he pushed into you. with the feeling of his veiny shaft inside you, sending electric currents throughout your body. the feeling of his lips on yours. moaning, you pulled away and rested your forehead on beomgyuâs. âiâm gonna c-cum again, gyu.â
he moved you so your back was against the bed again, your legs wrapped around his waist and his cock still deep inside you. groaning at the new angle, you wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him to you. âlet me help you, baby. l-let me do the work,â beomgyu mumbled before you kissed him.
in passionate thrusts, you came around him again and a few seconds later you felt his warm cum pour inside of you. his hips jerked against yours and he let out a whine as he rolled into you, not planning on slowing down. âb-beomgyuâŠâ you whimpered, gripping him tighter and throwing your head back so you were staring hazily at the ceiling. you didnât know how much more you could take.
âl-look at me, my pretty baby, i n-need to see your face,â beomgyu said between hard pants. between the sounds of your skin slapping together and the wet sounds of him entering and exiting you repeatedly. you looked at him through knitted brows, your fingers in his hair and pulling his head back. âf-fuck⊠god, you d-donât know what you d-do to me,â he murmured, eyes shutting for a moment. you pulled him down to kiss his jaw. âfeels⊠feels soâŠâ you couldnât even finish your sentence as you clenched around him again.
beomgyu was twitching inside you more and more and you could tell he was overstimulating himself just to make you feel good. his words of praise were being slurred as he stared deeply into your eyes, breathing erratically.
when the two had came together, you couldnât take anymore. your legs were shaking badly and your back was beginning to ache from how much you kept arching it. pushing beomgyu away until he was hovering above you, you barely managed to whimper out in a whisper, âc-canât take it a-anymore, beomieâŠâ
at your words he slipped out of you slowly, groaning loudly as you clenched tightly around his poor cock the whole way out. ây/nâŠâ beomgyu moaned. he hovered above you for a moment, forehead pressed to yours and arms trembling, before falling down next to you. beomgyu pulled you towards him until you were wrapped in his body. you tried not to think about how his still half hard cock was up against your sensitive pussy. his breath fanning your skin and sending a shiver up your spine.
the two of you stayed like that for a couple minutes, coming down from your highs and breathing the same air. beomgyu had been trailing lines down your torso with the tips of his fingers, leaving goosebumps in his wake. you could feel his smile against your cheek at the way your body reacted to his touch.
when you both were strong enough to get up, he cleaned the cum from between your legs and his with a warm and wet towel and then guided you to the bathroom. beomgyu drew a bubble bath for the both of you, helping you inside of it when your legs began to shake and your knees almost gave out.
now you laid back against his chest inside the bathtub, one of his hands trailing up and down your arm with a washcloth and the other wrapped tightly against your lower stomach. âyou donât know how long iâve wanted thisâŠâ beomgyu trailed off softly. you turned slightly so you could look up at him. âyou donât know how long i wanted this either. how long i wanted to be with you in general.â
beomgyu smiled warmly down at you, that same warm smile he would give you every time you sang together. âhow long?â he asked, playfulness slipping into his tone. âfor as long as i can remember,â you giggled. âfor as long as iâve known you.â he pressed a kiss to your temple, the action sending ripples to your heart. âiâve wanted it for longer,â he replied, laughing when you playfully scoffed up at him. âthis isnât our first life together.â
that sentiment made you turn in the tub to face him fully, your eyebrows knitting together and your eyes full of fondness. it almost brought tears to your eyes. âbeomgyuâŠâ you murmured as you cupped his face softly and brought your lips to his. you kissed him slowly, trying to show him how much you loved him through it. your actions and words alone will never be able to fully express how you feel for him.
after the two of you cleaned up more in the bath, you laid side by side in your bed. thankfully, you still had some of beomgyuâs clothes that you just couldnât get rid of from when you still lived together and you would steal them. you were in one of beomgyuâs old shirts now, body up against his in the darkness of your bedroom.
âiâm gonna miss you when you leave to go back on tour. i donât want you to leave,â you whispered softly into the darkness. you werenât very good at expressing your fears out loud, clearly. but you had to let him know. had to let him know that you didnât want this to be just a one time thing and you never see each other again. âso come with me,â beomgyu replied at your same tone, simply. âcome with me and we wonât have to miss each other.â
you couldnât help but think of the lyrics of the song he wrote for you, the one the two of you would sing together. âover the canopy, itâs each other that we always seem to miss.â he was right about âgrazeâ having a whole new meaning in his interview. first, it meant the longing between the two of you. always dancing around each other, fingertips always seeming to just brush up against the otherâs but never fully grasping. then, it meant the two of you drifting apart. missing the opportunity to admit your feelings and be together. and lastly, right now. right in this moment, the two of you together again after two long years. missing each other until your heart aches even though youâre right next to each other. it is funny how meanings change.
âokay,â you giggled softly. âiâll come with you.â you werenât going to linger. he was right, this wasnât your first life together, you could feel it. you were gonna stay with him forever. beomgyu pulled you closer, nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck.
last night, your world was turned back on itâs rightful axis as you and your bestfriend beomgyuâyour lover beomgyu, sealed the two of your souls together.
that morning you both had woken up to a ton of missed calls and a plethora of text messages. you both stared at each other with wide eyes after realizing that the two of you had basically silently walked out of the celebration that was held for beomgyu. yeonjun scolding the two of you when he realized that not only was beomgyu not at his own party, but that you werenât there either.
quick kisses and giggles were shared as beomgyu raced to get ready for the schedule he had to do today. âtext me, okay? i want to hear from you. iâll let you know when weâre leaving for the next stop, so get your bags ready,â beomgyu said, throwing his coat on and pressing another kiss to your lips, deepening the kiss for just a moment before he pulled away.
you were standing by the door, a lovesick smile on your face, âi will!â you giggled as he stalled more and pulled you into a hug. âand donât delete the kisses,â he whispered, kissing your cheek before finally making his way through the door. you waved goodbye to him and shut the door, immediately pulling out your phone.
you: iâll see you later today. good luck on your interview! xxx
there was an immediate response from him and you giggled as you read it and responded.
beomie: thank you, baby! i love you!! you: i love you more!! xxx beomie: i love you more than there are stars in the sky!!! you: and i love you more than there are galaxies in our universe!!!! xxx beomie: okay⊠you win⊠but only because i canât think of anything better!!!
laughing, you went to your room and started packing the things you needed for beomgyuâs tour.
two years agoâfour since the beginningâyou left the kisses at the end of your messages to your boyfriend beomgyu.
you were backstage just before one of his shows with him and yeonjun. beomgyuâs arm was wrapped around your waist, pulling you into his side. your mouth was currently hung open in shock at yeonjunâs revealing news.
âiâm sorry, y/nie, but i just had to tell him. two years i had to listen to the both of you cry over each otherâtwo years! i couldnât do it anymore. i had to tell him about the things you were saying!â yeonjun sighed dramatically as if he were so defeated. you pushed his shoulder lightly, âyou ass! then you had the nerve to set the two of us up at beomgyuâs concert with the tickets he gave you!â
beomgyu let out a laugh from next to you, laughing louder when you turned a playful glare to him. âif i didnâtâŠâ yeonjun trailed as he spoke to you with raised eyebrows, âyou two wouldnât be together right now. now would you?â you rolled your eyes at him, wrapping your arms around beomgyu and laying your head on his chest.
âiâd like to think we would find our way back together,â beomgyu spoke, looking down at you. you smiled up at him in return. âuh huhâŠâ said yeonjun, causing the three of you to erupt into laughter.
since beomgyuâs debut album and tour to go along with it, heâs released two more albums. all of the songs about you, once again. in every interview he had, he gushed about you to whoever would listen. youâve also finally published your book, deciding to let beomgyuâs essence flow through the entirety of it. you couldnât remove him even if you tried. and trust, you had tried.
one of the staff members gave a signal to beomgyu and he nodded back and gave a thumbs up. it was almost time for him to be on stage. for the first time ever, you were singing âgrazeâ and âforethoughtâ together with their whole new meanings.
you stared at beomgyuâs stunning side profile as he peeked out to the crowd. you almost laughed at yourself, at your past thoughts. of course love was meant for you. of course you and beomgyu were meant to be together, meant to be in love. meant to share each of your lifetimes and universes and supernovas and nebulas and brand new brightly burning newborn stars together.
of course the two of you were meant to love each other forever, how could you ever think differently?
© jjunieworld - all rights reserved. please do not repost on any social media sites, translate, or modify any of my works.
permanent taglist: @jjunberry @gothgyuu @spooksh0wbabe @beargyuuzz @kittyhyuka @dani-is-tired @soobieboobiedoobiedaboobie @rapmonie2047 @riaawr
v-day event masterlistâmasterlistârequest rules
warnings 1.8k words, implied child neglect, the dark themes of the house of the hearth, once again i will say that this is not canon compliant
notes thank u naosaki (art) for proofreading the first ever chapter of the series!!! and being my hypeman overall LMFAO
masterlist | next chapter
A deep breath. In, out. Once more. Rehearsed lines, practiced smiles, and a heart as steady as a frightened squirrel.
âGood?â
You meet his eyes. âGood.â
The corset isnât as suffocating as you expected it would be. Aether ensures that youâre as comfortable as possible dressed in this snug bodice with a puffed-up, full skirt that drapes gracefully down your legs in a deep shade that blends in seamlessly with those of those who walk past the busy streets of Fontaineâbecause youâd eventually have to fight with this thing on.
The polearm feels heavy nestled in your palms. Strange, as you had never gone through a night without spinning it around your body and thrusting it into the air in the solitude of the night where no one would suspect a thing. You flick your wrist, not bothered to watch it disperse into the air. Youâve come to a point where green stems are more at home in your hands than weapons. Youâre not sure why you donât feel content with that revelation.
âAre you ready?â
Your gaze snaps to Aether, whoâs looking at you warily as if standing across a ticking bomb. âYes.â You offer a smile, hoping it comes across as comforting.
Aether tries for a smile back, though it looks more like a grimace. You can see it in his eyes: he doesnât trust you. But his desire to learn more overpowers his wariness, and now, youâve struck a deal. So long as youâre wearing this disguise, you are allies.
âPaimon is starting to miss your muddy apron,â Paimon says, wilting as you twirl around. âYou look a lot less like Y/N.â
âThis is who I really am, Paimon.â You glance to the ruffles and the thick coat, engulfing you in everything Fontaine.Â
Paimon tilts her head. âWho?â
You cast her a dry smile. âRunaway coward, fraud, and Fatuu.â
YEARS BEFORE.
For as long as you can remember, youâve been an orphan under the care of âFatherâ.
If you were to shut your eyes and reminisce about life before the orphanage, youâd catch a fleeting glimpse of your motherâs face as you were surrendered over to grand doors, ones that felt like they were fifteen feet tall and thick enough to keep you from your family. You donât know if your mother was kind or if she intended to leave you here long enough for everyone to call you an orphan. You eventually stopped dreaming about her.
You find that it doesnât matter because youâre already here. You wouldnât know where she would be. Waking up spelled out another day of pushing through.
âHush, child,â a voice whispered as you hiccuped, overwhelmed with unfamiliar faces and tall, tall walls. Your chin was gripped by hands with sharp nails, but they didnât hurt you. âSave your tears. You are safer here.â
You blinked rapidly, tremors jostling your shoulders with each ugly sob, tears rolling down your cheeks. Your breathing slowed as the shed tears cleared your vision, finally seeing the woman in front of you. She looked as if she had just done something horrible; she looked as if she wouldnât hesitate to slit your throat if you screamed and thrashed around her hold.
You looked at her and saw someone you knew would protect you.
It became a little less dull when âFatherâ let you borrow one of the weapons from the stash. The one you chose reeked of dried blood and looked dangerously unused, its surface marred by rust. It was long, and you concluded from the tip that it was no sword; it was all too different from the weapons youâve seen around. On your first swing, you stumbled and nearly let it slip through your fingers.
âA polearm,â âFatherâ noted, staring down at you in a way that felt as if she was scrutinizing every action and every thought running through your head. âWould you like to try it out?â
It was difficult. Each swing felt as if you were inches away from hitting your own headâor, even worse, felt as if you would make the wrong move and hit âFatherâ, whoâs watching you in silence. She doesnât stand from where sheâs seated, though she does speak here and there. Stand straighter; donât hold it too tightly; watch your balance.
You loved it. You held onto the rusty polearm more than you breathe. You train, and train, and train until it twirls around your fingers seamlessly, like water rushing through smooth rocks, until itâs as easy as a second limb.
That is how you made a name for yourself in the House of the Hearth.
During the times âFatherâ returned briefly from business trips, youâd make her watch you train. You made her see how far youâd come, and she knew it, too. Sheâd even invite the other orphans to spar with you, but you were never defeated.
The orphans would hear your name, and theyâd either scrunch their noses in distaste or brighten up in aweâitâs all the same, in your opinion. They hear your name and think of how fondly Arlecchino favors you.
The next one, they whisper. The next king.
The House of the Hearth became something greater than a home. It became a training ground for future soldiers, disguised as an orphanage, yet it treated you far better than your own household. Here, you've matured in wisdom with each thrust of your weapon and with every hidden truth that Teyvat conceals; it's where you learned to sharpen and embrace them all. Here, no one can hurt you. No one tries to break down your walls or question why you have them up in the first place.Â
âFatherâ took you in and gave you another chance. âFatherâ saw your battered arms and torn faith and introduced you to a house where you wouldnât ever have to feel this broken again. And you, too young and too aware of the creeping loneliness clawing at you, took her hand and never looked back.
The House of the Hearth is where you learned what it was like to feel respect. Fear goes hand-in-hand with it, but you canât help it if it canât bring you down because youâve climbed far too out of reach.
âThat was a really good match,â Freminet mumbles as you walk over, sweaty all over and panting from exhaustionâbut thereâs a wide smile on your face, only ever appearing after battling someone.
You beam at his praise. âYeah? I was testing a new move last night. It didnât work, though.â
âI didnât even notice you slipping,â Freminet says, puzzled, prompting a burst of laughter from you.
This side of you is only reserved for Freminet. To everyone elseâand especially âFatherââyouâre cold and cruel, and you donât like wasting time with other people. But youâve grown fond of Freminet, just as his quiet murmurs and hours-long of whispers are meant just for you. Itâs a strange friendship. Everyone else thinks you could never get along.
What everyone else thinks doesnât matter. Nothing else matters, not when youâre something here.
ââFatherâ is calling for you,â Freminet says, gesturing vaguely to the side.
You pat Freminetâs head and flick the polearm back to life, materializing in your hands. âIâll see you at dinner, âkay? Donât sneak off this time.â Freminet pretends to think about it, humming thoughtfully, then smiles when you nudge his shoulder before darting off.
âEvery kingdom would have the next king,â is what âFatherâ says when youâre a few steps across her. Thereâs a ghost of a smile on her faceâor at least is what you like to think. Your heart races. âI see it in you, child.â
Warmth fills your chest. You bow your head to hide the unprofessional and childish smile.
âAh,â she continues, looking off to the side. âBefore I forgetâŠfetch your siblings. I have news to share.â
You frown, failing to hide your disappointment. You were hoping for a bit more. âOf course, âFatherâ.â
The House of the Hearth was perfect. This was where you thrivedâwhere no one else could take this victorious feeling away.
But then Lynette became a part of the âfamilyâ, and with it, she dragged along Lyney.
Lyney, with his slicked back, matted hair, violet eyes wide yet somehow dim, and figure thinner than a stickâthe picture of every orphan stumbling into their new home for the very first time. Lyney, who stands beside âFatherâ as theyâre introduced, his gaze wandering the room, the unfamiliar faces, then your unimpressed eyes. Lynette is behind him, peeking out from his shoulder.
âFatherâ gives them the usual: a promise of no betrayal, a promise of a bond as strong as the blood shared between the twins. They listen. You scowl.
It is also here, in the House of the Hearth, where your world is flipped upside down, all because of violet eyes that seem to have never left yours.
Thereâs something about Lyney that unnerves you.
You assure Freminet that itâs not just because youâre miffed that The Knave is paying too close attention to the twins. You would get over the jealousyâyou knew it was for the twins to feel at ease as they settled in; sheâd done the same to you (the only difference is she never stopped). But Freminet has also taken a deep liking to them, saying youâre wary for no reason.
He isnât wrong. Youâre wary for a reason youâre not sure why just yet.
It was just that Lyneyâs face pissed you off.
He keeps staring from over âFatherââs legs, sharp eyes following your movements. His face is blank, keeping you from reading his thoughts, yet his eyes are wide. You canât tell if itâs akin to a trembling puppy or a cat prepared to pounce. You hate the feeling of his eyes boring into your skin.
You tell âFatherâ all of this as the other orphans scurry off to bed, and youâre in charge of cleaning the dining table. With each plate stacked, venom spits from your mouth, brows knitted, and teeth bared in a snarl. You havenât questioned any of âFatherââs decisionsâyouâre wary of this particular one, though.
âFatherâ has that quirk on her lips, amusement evident on her suspiciously bright expression. âYou havenât met Lyney yet, have you? Whatâs brought this reaction out of you?â
You nearly fumble with the glasses, avoiding her eyes. âI-Itâs not as if I hate him. I justâI donât know. Thereâs something strange about him.â
And speaking of strange, âFatherâ has that look in her eye that youâre starting to feel agitated by. You think that the knowing smile is a nice look on her, however, youâre not sure if whatâs running through her head at the moment can be considered nice.
âI see,â she says, a lilt in her tone.
âSee what, âFatherâ?â You bristle when she smiles wider. âSee what?â
references: kingdom and the next king â lyney voiceline: about âfatherâ: king
taglist @thenyxsky
Pairing : Kyoya Ootori x reader
General rating : Fluff, enemies to love vibes
Word count : 3K
Summary: As only heir to your family you are bound to an arranged marriage with the third son of the powerful house Ootori. His cold behavior is only a mask for you to uncover when you stumble into music room number three.
Hi! Iâm just taking a short break from posting for a week or two just because my finals are right around the corner and I obviously have to take care of that first and secure that diploma! So I hope you enjoy this chapter and Iâll see you in a week or two, Iâll keep you updated!
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summary you will not let lyney get to you. unfortunately, lyney already got to you the moment you met eyes. after all, what is a magician if not an expert in stealing hearts?
or, local sumeru architect goes to fontaine looking for inspiration and comes out of it with three rainbow roses and a crushing magician.
warnings 13+, gn!reader, follows the fontaine archon quest, so there are major spoilers throughout the entire fic! MURDER (lyney trial spoilers) + feminine french pet names ough + bff!Aether loml + sweet talker lyney + KISS SCENE (suggestive)
notes 8K words. thank u to my french bff art @aanobrain who said lyney is a magician he would say mon lapin đ€§â€ïž + other various french pet names. thank u to ellie hyomagiri & earthtooz too for hyping this up, my supportersâŠ
â500,000!?â
Sumeru streets are always bustling with its peopleâfrom children skipping around the neighborhood to frantic scholars who zip back and forth before returning to their homes when the moon is high. However, the sun is beating down on everyone right now: street vendors are making a profit, dogs are barking as they play fetch with laughing children, and you stand across the blond traveler and his floating companion.
You wince at the volume of Paimonâs shrill voice, inciting bypassers to send miffed glances your way. Embarrassed, you cover the side of your face with a hand, whispering, âIsâis that not enough? I canââ
âNo, no, itâs not that!â Paimonâs arms flail around, eyes blown comically wide. âItâs just, you know, more than what we earn from our daily commissions combined!â
âOh, I see.â you nod, relieved. âWell, I can lowerââ
âNo, no, no, no,â Paimon interjects hurriedly, and even the traveler shakes his head. âPleasure to do business with you! Paimon and Aether, at your service!â
âReally?â you canât believe your luckâthe traveler himself agreed to escort you to Fontaine! Or does it count if Paimon agrees on his behalf? âThat's a relief. Even Katheryne of the guild had a strange expression when I posted my commission.â
âItâs probably because of the amount of zeroes you mightâve accidentally put,â Paimon murmurs.
Aether tugs on her foot as if warning her. âWe'll be leaving soon. Are you prepared?â
âOh, yes. My stuffâs over there by the bench, you see?â
Aether and Paimonâs faces simultaneously fall. âAll of that?â Paimon starts counting it, gaping when she has four little fingers held up.
They sure complain a lot. âYou can still back out.â
Aether takes a deep breath, making his way over to your luggage. When he brushes past, you hear him chanting 500,000; 500,000; 500,000 under his breath. He wordlessly carries all of them, his chest puffed and expression grave.
âTheyâre heavier than I thought,â Aether wheezes out as Paimon flits worriedly around him. âHow long are you going to be staying in Fontaine?â
âOh, just a day or two, maybe,â you say, taking pity and taking one bag from him. âMost of whatâs inside are art supplies.â
âAh,â Aether says.
â500,000,â Paimon reminds him.
âWeâre close,â Paimon says, flying back to where you and Aether are still walking behind, him heaving and you offering water now and then. âI saw a huge ravine-looking view! It was like a city on a waterfall!â
âR-Really?â Aether puffs out a breath, sweat rolling off his temple.
You tried prying some of your bags away from him when it seemed like there were monsters up ahead, but he refused instead to fight them with one hand on his sword. He still won. You guessed that he was trying to make traveling easier for you, yet all you felt was immense worry.
âAre you feeling okay, Y/N?â Paimon asks, floating beside you. âYou look unwell.â You should ask your companion that, instead.
âIâm a bit nervous. After all, itâs my first time traveling outside of Sumeru.â You smile, patting her head. She doesnât seem to mind, beaming back. âBut I need to get out of my comfort zone to be better, right?â
âThat's right! Paimon has a feeling youâll enjoy Fontaine!â You and Paimon glance at Aether when he heaves a heavy breath, yet he only waves the pair of you off with his free hand. âBefore you know it, youâll be itching to travel again once youâre back in Sumeru.â
âI'm only there for work. I just need to learn a lot, and then I'll enjoy it.â
âStill a student through and through, huhâŠâ
âI can see it,â Aether chimes in, looking all too relieved to rest his arm finally. âI can see Fontaine up ahead.â
You feel the cool breeze brush against your face, a refreshing change from the past hours you and the other two have been trudging through the desert. You could strip off layers and dive if you could. You can make out the harbor even miles away, pouring water out like an endless waterfall stretching for miles.
Arriving in Fontaine is introducing yourself to the rustle of layered skirts, the water-kissed smell, and citizens left and right babbling about tragic endings and thrilling climaxes.
Aether sets your bags on the floor with a heavy exhale. Paimon feeds him with another jug of water.
âI guess weâre here now.â You pull out a heavy pouch youâve been keeping in one of the bags Aether had been holding over his shoulder. Paimon takes it with greedy, greedy hands. âThank you for keeping me safe and carrying my luggage, Travelerâ are you even listening to me?â
âThereâs a girl over there,â Aether says, now staring ahead.
You and Paimon turn to look; sure enough, someone is standing by the edge, looking forlornly over the water. Half of her foot is off the platform, making Paimon fidget.
She gasps. âShe isnât going to jump into the water, is she? Maybe we should go check on herâŠâ
Halfway through Paimonâs sentence, you gathered the courage to speak to the girl with the cat ears.
âHey, miss.â Her ear twitches. âIs something the matter?â
She turns, looking faintly surprised. If you werenât so close to her, you wouldnât have been able to tell there was a change in her expression. âI'm fine. thank you.â
âOh.â Now things are a little awkward. âIs there something in the water youâre looking at? You might slip if you keep tipping forward.â
She peers below, unworriedâsilent.
âAs long as youâre okay, I guess,â you sigh, awkwardly hovering above her shoulder when realizing it might come off strange if you touch her. âIâll leave you be.â
Her lips twitch, something close to a smile. You donât stick long enough to admire it, heading back to Aether and Paimon and shrugging at their inquisitive looks. âShe says sheâs fine.â
âI think itâs time for me to separate,â you say. âI want to take all of it in as much as possible. Paimon has my payment. Thank you both so much for keeping me safe.â Mostly Aether, though. But Paimon was there, emotionally.
âItâs no problem,â Aether says, his smile warmer than when you first met him. âStay safe out there. You can look for us if you need anything else.â
âI donât always pay 500,000 for each of my commissions.â
Paimon wilts. Aether flushes, stammering, âNot what I meant.â You laugh heartily as they wave when you walk off to the aquabus, hopefully, prepared for what Fontaine will give you.
Your sketchbook is a page away from completion when you hear about a magic show at the Opera House. Not that it was hard to missâeveryone and their grandmothers were prattling about nothing else but the entire day.
Fontaine is known for its love for dramatics, but the twins they keep mentioning must be a one-of-a-kind spectacle to have half their regionâs population speak about them so reverently.
After wandering for hours, taking in the endless sights of fresh water streaming and grand castle-like modern buildings, you find yourself in the Fountain of Lucine. Youâve heard of Fontaine being somewhat titled the âCity of Love,â but seeing couples surrounding each nook and cranny of the tourist spots was still astonishing.
(You console yourself by thinking that thereâs something romantic in sketching frantically while the rest of the crowd are sucking faces.)
To your luck, you spot three familiar heads in the fountain plaza.
Aether senses you before you can even say anything, glancing to the side and smiling when you wave at him.
Paimon flutters excitedly. âY/N! We didnât think weâd see you again this early. You look like youâre glowing.â
âWas it that obvious?â you laugh sheepishly. âFontaine is beautiful; I couldnât even stick too long in one place before I see something else that catches my attention.â You look to the girl you met earlier, who nods politely. âHello. Are you three acquainted now?â
âMhm!â Paimon says, hands on her hips. âThis is Lynette! Sheâs inviting us to the show theyâre holding here!â She gasps, âSpeaking ofââ
âAh,â Lynette says quietly, âI couldnât get an extra ticket. Iâm sorry.â
Lynette is the magician you keep hearing about? With her seemingly reserved personality, you wouldnât have guessed it. âOh, no, itâs fine. I wouldnât want to impose.â
âPaimon,â Aether speaks up. âThey gave you your ticket, right? Why donât you just float next to me or sit on my lap?â
Paimonâs eyes sparkle. âGreat idea! That way, I can give my seat to Y/N, right?â
âYou guysâŠâ Your chest feels warm as Aether hands you one of the two tickets in his hand. âYou really didnât have to.â Is this what 500,00 gets you? The loyal companionship of Aether and Paimon?
âItâs a good idea,â Lynette says. âMy brother wouldnât want you to miss the show. Heâd be devastated.â
âIf you insist, then I suppose I canât refuse.â Aether and Paimon do a cute little cheer. âBut I need to return to the hotel; I canât be watching a magic show carrying all these.â Surely Aether can understand.
Later, with your hands finally empty and charcoal-free, you rush back to the Opera Epiclese, the person standing guard kind enough to open the doors despite being a minute late.
âWelcome, one and all, to the Opera Epiclese!â The audience roars with cheers as the spotlight illuminates a figure on the center of the stage. You hurry to your seats, brushing past Aether and Paimon. âI am the star of todayâs show, Lyney.â
Lyney bows, then stands upright with a Cheshire cat grin.
The thunder of the crowdâs applause is deafening. If you werenât able to see it, youâd think that you hadnât been clapping at allâsenses numbed and your fixed stare all on the boy on the stage.
Your eyes catch on the small braid on the side of his head before the gleam of his eyes hypnotizes you.
Heâs handsome, you think dizzily at the back of your head.
âDonât blink,â he says, his voice lower as if meant to be a whisper, âor else you might miss it.â
The show proceeds. A dove soars away from inside as he flips his hat; you flush at hearing the soft laughter that slips from him after. The cards that materialize out of nowhere descend to the floor. His fingers shuffle the cards while talking to keep the audience satiated; they fly off his hands, yet he doesnât lose focus, stretching them mid-air with a sleight of hand. They fall apart and come together neatly and precisely.
His stage presence is demanding. It would be as if Lady Furina herself would accuse you of committing a crime if you were to look away for even a second.
Then, when he scans the crowd, busy twirling his cards in his fingers, his gaze catches your awed ones.
Something in the air shifts. Or maybe itâs that it slows.
A card slips from his grasp. A mistake. He blinks and breaks eye contact, laughing heartily to play it off. But you donât believe itânot when you swore your limbs locked in place as well when lilac drilled into your soul.
You breathe, hands bracing against your chest. What was that?
You wouldâve played it off as something you imagined if not for Lyney continuing to glance at you occasionally. His slip-up had been forgotten, as though it was all part of the show.
(Is it also part of the show when it seems heâs unable to tear his eyes off of you?)
Of course, the twins prove their worth. They showed you exactly why the people of Fontaine adore watching them through theatrical magic, cards in their sleeves, and defying logic.
Youâve shuffled to the edge of your seat as Lynette disperses into bubbles and comes back alive. Youâve held your breath as Lyney emerges from the box across he was in a moment earlier.
Youâve also been witness to the murder of Cowell.
CRASH.
The shatter of glass resounded along with the horrified gasps of the audience. Sickeningly enough, you could almost hear the crack of bones if you hadnât been crying out in alarm. Yet, as they gape and shriek over the sight of a limp arm popping out, you find your gaze tracing back to Lyney, who stands motionless in front of the box.
When Lady Furina points fingers and has everyone siding against him, the guards escort the audience from the Opera House. All evidence presented left Lyney in a spotlight unlike his performance: with a disgusted and unamused crowd. Even you have to agree that it isnât looking well for his case at all.
Yet all you can think of as you leave the room is that Lyney looked as terrified as everyone else wasâmuch too raw of an expression for someone to accuse him of anything at all. He looked young and scared.
(His hands were shaking.)
The rest of your Fontaine trip is admittedly duller when youâre a little more familiar with its city and donât have a yapping little fairy and a capable Traveler by your side. Itâs hard not to hear chatter about the events that went down: Lyneyâs trial, Aether volunteering to be his lawyer, and the truth behind the real murderer.
It solved a case beyond the murder of Cowell. Fontaine sure has its mysteries, and the crowd sure loves them as they would a magic show.
You keep your hands busy. Last night, you found yourself thinking back to the magic show, to deft fingers weaving through cards, to violet eyes that kept on flickering to you. By the time you snap back to reality, youâve subconsciously drawn shapes and lines that suspiciously look like the magician himself: the curve of a smile, piercing eyes, and you entranced by it all.
Flustered, you crumple his face staring back at you out of sight. Yet you canât bring yourself to throw it away.
You shove the last bit of garlic baguette in your mouth to furiously bat these unwanted thoughts away.
âIsnât that Y/N?â Paimonâs voice is unmistakable, a short distance off.
You jump out of your skin, spinning to see Aether and Paimon waving and walking over to you. You thought they'd already left Fontaine after that; you wouldnât blame them if they did.
âY/N! We havenât seen you since the Opera House performance,â Paimon exclaims, twirling around your head like a thrilled fly circling a trash can.
You hold onto her back, hoping sheâll stop making you dizzy. âWe were escorted out before I could say goodbye. I couldnât watch the court trial but heard it all turned out fine.â
âThatâs right!â Paimon nods proudly. âPaimon helped a ton during it; you shouldâve seen it! What have you been doing?â
âI found a fellow architect while visiting the cafe nearby, and we chatted for hours,â you say, remembering that your voice is hoarse for that reason. You also donât tell them you couldnât get a certain magician off your mind. âI learned a lot. I donât regret coming here one bit.â
Paimon says something else that youâre sure youâve nodded absentmindedly at while your gaze wanders over to the two familiar people a few feet behind, watching you three with cat-like eyesâand itâs not just because of Lynetteâs unique features.
âThose are the magicians, right?â you gesture behind Paimon and Aether as if you havenât already familiarized yourself with their faces.
Paimon nods. âUh-huh. You should introduce yourself! They look like they want to talk.â
Something about that feels foreboding. âUm, no, itâs fine. I donât want to be rude and interrupt your conversation.â
âNo,â Aether says firmly. He seldom speaks; you might as well play along if he says so. âBesides, Paimon is right. Lyney wants to talk to you, you know?â
âOh, yeah! He kept mentioning seeing someone sitting beside us! And it couldnât have been Neuvillette because he said it was an unfamiliar beauty that bewitched this weak magicianâs heart.â Paimon nods, even recalling how heâs enunciated each syllable theatrically.
âIâm sorry?â you blurt. âLyney recognizes me? What did I do?â
âPaimon thinks itâs because Lyney is curious about who Lynette met! He was like that with us, too.â Paimon changes her pitch to match Lyneyâs. âAre these your friends, Lynette?â
Aetherâs eyes feel like they know something you donât. âIt wonât hurt to strike up a conversation with Lyney. Heâs been shaken up since the trial.â
Thereâs something unspoken hidden in his words. âWhat does that mean?â
Paimon doesnât wait for an answer, grabbing you by the arm and dragging you to where the twins are waiting. Aether chuckles as he jogs behind.
âPaimon, Aether,â Lyney says, almost sly, âYou havenât introduced us to your friend here.â
âPaimon can do it!â She floats on top of your head and does a bit of jazz hands. âThis is Y/N, the one who commissioned us to escort them from Sumeru up to Fontaine.â
âGenerously,â Aether adds.
Itâs a little embarrassing to have the legendary Traveler and Paimon introduce little old you to a famous magician such as himself, but his grin is still excited.
âFrom Sumeru?â Lyney repeats, smiling wider when you nodâas if that crumb of attention is enough for him. âI see.â
He performs a bow around the same height as where your hands rest; he takes one, kisses the back of your palm, and smiles against your skin. âIâm Lyney, and she is my sister, Lynette.â
âItâs nice to see you again.â You smile at Lynette, who nods in return. Lyney straightens to look at his sister.
âWe met when the Traveler and Paimon just arrived at the harbor,â Lynette sighs even without looking at her brother.
âItâs a pleasure to meet you,â you say, meeting Lyneyâs eyes. The spot where he kissed is still warmâtingling. âYour show was incredible, despite what happened. Iâm glad that the truth revealed itself.â
âThank you.â Lyneyâs gaze sharpens. âI saw you at the performance, yes. I was worried for a second you might steal the show if you were to come up on stage.â
You blink. âAre you sayingââ
Lyney grins, âI apologize that the night had to end that way; it mustâve been horrifying. Say, what if I give you a little show right now to make it up to you?â Did he make it up to each one of his audience, too?
This is not a man acting âshaken up,â as Aether put it.
âYou really donât have to.â You glance at Aether and Paimon, silently asking for help; however, theyâre too far gone, urging you to say yes with gestures and encouraging nods.
Lyney tilts his head, demanding your attention on him once more.
You sigh. âI would love to see it if you donât mind.â
âOf course!â Lyney looks like heâs the sun bursting personified. âIt would be a pleasure, ma chĂ©rie. Not to worry, itâs nothing life-threatening. I just need you to focus on me.â
Not that itâs hard. The others have become a dull buzz in your mind as Lyney holds your gaze. âOkay.â
Lyney smiles, much softer, satisfied. âGood. Now,â he tips his hat, ârecently, Iâve received a little lesson from someone about the language of flowers. Are you familiar with them?â
âNot in Fontaine, no,â you mumble, watching his hands closely. You were expecting a rabbit to hop out of that hat any second now.
âShame. But I suppose I wouldnât want to spoil the fun.â Lyney snaps his finger, then deposits his hand inside his hat. âHmm⊠Oh? Somethingâs not quite right. Would you mind looking into this hat for me to see if the flower is here?â
You hesitate. The hat is so close to him.
Swallowing, you nod, leaning in to inspect his hat at a careful pace. All you can sense is the faint scent of heat Lyney is emanating, the breath you two share, and the pounding of your chest. You swear you could also hear his, matching yours.
âThe hatâs empty.â
Lyney smiles wider. âYes, perhaps because you already have it.â
You jump back in surprise, your hands patting your body to see where he could have snuck the flower in. With your frantic movement, the flower falls off from what seems to have come from your headâLyney catches it.
His mouth carves into a smirk, leaning to invade your personal space, his free hand coming up to tuck hair behind your ear. âCareful.â
Your face is burning. Plucking the flower out, the delicate and tender pink sears into your palm. âWhat does this flower mean?â
âWhat does it, I wonder?â Lyney whispers thoughtfully. âI suppose youâll have to tell me once you find out.â
And when he inclines backward, it feels like you can breathe again. Time flows normally, and the people passing by seem much louder than beforeâas though youâve surfaced from underwater.
Lyney clears his throat. âShame I havenât prepared myself a grand show for you, but I suppose that would call for another time, wouldnât it?â
Lynette is looking at Lyney as if he is stupidly amusing.
âThank you,â you say, burning, burning. âFor the show, I mean.â
âThat was a little weird,â Paimon whispers to Aether, but she is terrible with keeping volume and has everyone turning to her with varying expressions. âP-Paimon means that was good! Wow, Lyney! Isnât that a different flower you gave us? Thatâs the flower Charlotte was talking about, right?â
âRainbow rose?â Aether supplies.
âYes! It meansââ
âAhem.â Lyney is quick to interrupt. âLynette and I must take our leave now, if you donât mind. It was fun catching up with you two.â You have to hold your ground and not look away when he hones in on your figure. âAnd itâs a pleasure meeting you. Donât be a stranger. Look for me if you want more.â
His smile is a little devilish, you now realize.
âBye,â Lynette says blankly, following after her brother, who seemed to be hurrying to exit.
His ears were red.
âYouâre still staring.â
âI am not,â you rebuke hotly, flailing to cover Aetherâs mouth with your hands. Yet all it does is bring your attention back to where Paimon and Aether are staringâthe rainbow rose on your person.
Paimon and Aether yelp when you drag them away despite Lyney having already left the scene.
âHeyâ! Donât just go dragging Paimon around like a balloon like that! Did Lyney get to your head that much?â
âHe did not.â
Paimon tilts her head, frowning. You shy away from her worried gaze, glaring at the flower instead. You still donât know how Lyney managed to get it there; you hold it to your chest, where your heart is racing miles per minute because of his stupidly smug smile.
âWhat does this flower mean, Paimon?â
Paimon seems elated to be of help. âEasy! Charlotte told us that Rainbow Roses mean âpassionâ and most notably âromantic encountersâ!â
âPassion,â you curse. The rose seems as if it is staring back innocently, unknowing of the turmoil youâre going through because of it. âRomantic encounters.â ugh.â
You can still remember how Lyneyâs eyes twinkled as you felt his breath against your face.
âOoh, he thinks he can trick me. He thinks he can affect me just because it pleases him to do so. Iâll show him. Iâll show him! I am not a blushing maiden!â
âYouâre already very affected by this,â Paimon says, yet itâs lost by your newfound determination. Two can play at this game.
Youâve definitely been staying in Fontaine longer than what you told Aether and Paimon, but you canât leave yet. Not when you found yourself walking to a flower shop to purchase a vase, fiercely digging through soil, turning gentle when your fingers reach for the Rainbow Rose. Not when you see it in the corner of your eyes as you try to sleep, and you find yourself daydreaming about a charming violet-eyed virtuoso.
Itâs for research, you excused lamely at the hotelkeeper who didnât ask why youâre extending your stay. In truth, not that youâd tell anyone. It was because you were hoping for another grand show from him. A farewell show for youâclosure.
If you were to travel back home and get too drunk to think straight, Kaveh would learn about your crisis (romantic awakening?) and laugh at your face.
In hopes of looking for your Fontaine architect friend, you spot Lyney instead, on the side of the street surrounded by cheering kids. They clap and jump, and Lyney laughs. âOne more, one more!â
âAgain?â Lyney does an exaggerated sigh. âIâm starting to run out of cards in my sleeves. Iâve guessed my entire deck from your hands by this point!â
âBut, Mr. Magician,â one of them whines, pouting up at him and blinking, âwe want to see more! We want to know how you do it!â
âAlright, how about this, hm?â And then Lyney peers right at you. Ironically, youâre the one startled when youâve been watching that entire spiel, and he hasnât acknowledged your presence beforehand. âY/N, would you mind giving these children a little show with me?â He gestures for you to come closer.
âWhat show?â you ask suspiciously, taking slow steps in case he pulls out another flower out of nowhere.
âYou donât have to worry,â Lyney laughs. âWill you be my assistant for this show? You are very familiar with this trick.â
âPlease, we want to see!â
You falter at the little kidsâ excited grins, especially when paired with Lyneyâs pout and round eyes. âOkay, tell me what to do.â
His eyes do the little gleam again. âStand in front of me, mon lapin.â
Your heart is skipping beat after beat, making itself known as you shuffle until Lyney is directly behind you.
âRelax, chĂ©rie, you just need to stand still.â Itâs a little hard to relax when you feel his breath against the back of your neck, but you wonât give him the satisfaction of admitting that, so you keep your chin high and relax your shoulders. âGood.âÂ
He begins to speak louder to his awaiting audience. âI know itâs hard to keep your eyes off this beauty before me, but watch the hat for a surprise, alright?â
He flips it for his little audience, one hand resting on your waist and the other extended to hold his top hat. The proximity is almost suffocating. You watch with bated breath, and they complain about it being empty.
âOh, is it?â Lyney hums, twirling the hat until itâs flipped upside down, presented right before you. âPerhaps I need my assistantâs help.â You snap out of your daze when you realize heâs talking to you. âY/N, do me a favor and show them the flower inside.â
You reach inside the hat and, much to your surprise, feel a stem. You pull it out; the Rainbow Rose stares back at you, almost mocking you, saying he did pull out a flower out of nowhere. It's this trick again.
The kids gasp in awe and confusionâitâs all the same for Lyney, who snaps his fingers and creates magic like he was made to. Like magic was for him to summon with his hands.
âWhat? It was empty!â
âWhere did that come from? I was watching Mister Magicianâs hands the whole time!â
âAre you a magician, too?â
âNo,â you say lamely, holding the rose, feeling Lyney still patiently standing behind you. Heat crawls up your neck. âNo, Iâm not. Itâs all Lyney.â
âItâs all me,â Lyney echoes in amusement. âYouâre quite magical yourself.â Finally, he spares you, pulling away to stand beside your figure. He doesnât take the rose backâmaybe even give it to one of the children. He knows exactly what heâs doing. âThatâs enough for today. The sun is setting, and your parents might get worried.â
They pout and slump their shoulders, but Lyney has this older brother's sternness to him that has the children scurrying back home anyway.
You then realize having to stand in front of Lyney was unnecessary.
The flower is warm. Lyneyâs eyes slip to yours.
âI didnât even have to stand in front of you like that,â you complain, heart inclined to race off your body.
âYes, but I feared that I would slip up again if I were to catch a glimpse of your face,â Lyney admits smoothly. His lips curl into a smirk when you stare wordlessly. âWhat? Donât believe me? I had to improvise when I saw you watching from afar.â
âA great magician such as yourself? Making a mistake? I doubt it.â
âYou already have such high expectations placed on me, chĂ©rie,â Lyney says, his smile easy, but his ears are a little red, poking out from his hair. âThatâs no good. With no audience, Iâm just plain âLyneyâ to you.â
âNo trickery? No cards up your sleeves?â you play along.
Lyney doesnât miss a beat. âNo, though I do have a few more roses begging to be held by your hands.â
âThey can keep begging.â Lyney grins wider when you glance down at his hands. âDo you give them off to everyone you meet?â
âWho do you take me for?â Lyney isnât offended; he laughs, delighted. He is preening under the sunsetâor maybe itâs your attention. âOf course not. At least, not like this.â
You stare, unimpressed. âSure.â
âSo cold, chĂ©rie,â Lyney sighs, plucking the stem from your fingers to slot it behind your ear. It seems he likes doing that. âHere I am, trying to get you to warm up to me, and you treat me like this.â
âYou donât have to. Iâll be going back home soon anyway.â
Lyneyâs expression shifts into something more unrecognizable, his eyes dipping down to somewhere below your nose. âOh. Avoiding attachment?â
You nod.
He grins, and heâs still so close. He knows how to entrance his audience, pulling you in until you forget to resist. Always watch the hands; yet Lyney could be digging a dagger to your side at this moment, and you wouldnât even notice.
âIâm flattered you even want to avoid me because you know youâd get attached,â he purrs, tilting his head. Is Lyney just big on personal space?Â
âDonât assume,â you retort. âI know how guys like you think. Even a magician as great as yourself canât trick someone whoâs already seen through it.â
âIt would be easier if it were just a trick, wouldnât it?â Lyney sighs, much to your confusion. âI take it that someone has told you what this flower means?â
Youâve nearly forgotten all about it. âYes.â You find yourself unable to look directly into his eyes. âI know.â
But even with that, you can still feel his heavy gaze, pinning you down and threatening the strength of your knees. You suppose it comes with being a performerâwatching his audience carefully, pinpointing each micro expression to say the right words.
âThere doesnât have to be any attachments.â
âWhat are you trying to say right now?â
Lyneyâs reaches for your hip, sharing your gaze like he doesnât know how to do anything else. âThat you enamor me. That I am holding back from wanting you. I know you feel the sameâyou can never hide anything from a magician. But if youâre concerned,â he mumbles, âthen this doesnât have to mean anything. You may call it infatuation.â
You want to laugh. Or maybe you want to cry. Most of all, you want to nod helplessly, wrap your arms around his neck, and give in. Itâs hard not to when he looks at you like that. âYou want me that bad?â
âI almost want to disagree.â
âAlmost?â Lyney gets closer, and you stop him with a palm on his chest. âWeâre outside.â
Lyney grins. âHave you forgotten what Fontaine is also known for? No one would bat an eye. Love is in the air, and all that.â
âAbsolutely not.â
âSo still youâre letting me?â
You laugh this time. Letting him, as if you arenât the one itching to pull him close and find out what heâs like behind the curtains. âAre you asking me as plain old âLyney?ââ
Lyney brightens, clearly pleased there wasnât a ânoâ. âYes.â
âNo tricks?â
âNo tricks. No strings.â
You let him lead you away into some dark alleyway. He kisses you like he was longing to do so all his life. You have only met him that fateful day, not even a week ago. But you claw at him like you get itâlike heâs ruined you for anyone else the moment you shared gazes in the Opera House.
Romantic encounters, you quietly recall as Lyney swipes a thumb over your aching bottom lip.
You donât see Lyney the day after that. And for some reason, it makes the itch worse. (Perhaps itâs because youâve gotten a taste and canât get enough.)
Itâs mostly your fault, the sudden disappearanceâyouâve cooped yourself up in the hotel room, buried your face in pillows, and screamed. You berate yourself for giving in, but another part of youâone thatâs louder than any other thought in your headâwants to do it again. Wants to hold his handsome face in your hands and have him kiss you breathless. That was nothing like you had ever felt before.
You groan. Itâs another new day. You might as well make some progress with your portfolio.
Thereâs a CafĂ© youâve been visiting more often than not. Ordering a drink and spending a good chunk of your day sketching the view. Instead, you find yourself staring at Aether, Paimon, and Lynette seated at one of the tables.
Lynetteâs eyes flick up to yours as she sips tea. She murmurs something to the other two, and you watch with amusement as Aether and Paimonâs heads snap to face you.
You let your gaze wander, eventually landing on Lyney, who is reciting his order with his charming-act-on smile, who is present because of course he is. You want to turn and run away, but thatâd be letting Lyney win, and youâre nothing if not stubborn and prideful.
âY/N!â Paimon greets once youâre within earshot, kicking her feet happily. âGood morning! What are you doing here?â
âBreakfast,â you reply, waving at them. Aether pulls a chair from the other table and gestures for you to sit. âDid I interrupt something?â
âNope!â Paimon swipes a fork from the table and digs in on the Ile Flottante, leaving nothing for Aether. âLynette and Lyney told us about another show theyâre holding to make up for the previous one.â
âMouth full,â Aether reminds her, a little too late as the Ile Flottante spews from her mouth.
âReally now? Maybe I can pay properly for a ticket this time,â you laugh, nodding at Lynette. She smiles faintly, hiding it behind the rim of her cup. Lynette sure is the polar opposite of her twin brother.
A shadow looms from behind, the silhouette of a figure with an unmistakable top hat. You tilt your chin and see Lyney peering down at you with a sweet smile. You will yourself to keep your gaze focused on his eyes only and nowhere else below the nose.
Speak of the devilâŠ
âSweetheart,â Lyney says instead of exchanging pleasantries like a normal person.
âLyney,â you reply in kind. Then you look away upon realizing that Aether, Paimon, and Lynette had been silently watching the exchange with muted, stunned expressions.
Lyney, holding a tray of drinks and food in both hands, scoots the chair next to yours with his ankle. âI wasnât informed that Y/N would be joining us,â he says, setting the drinks and plates down like a waiter with a flourish. âYou can drink mine. Let me order another.â
You hold onto his wrist as he makes his way back. He turns to you, surprised. âLet me at least pay for my own breakfast.â
Lyney grins, delicately withdrawing from your grip. He places a loud kiss on your hand. âDonât worry about it.â And then leaves, because he canât take no for an answer.
âIs it just me,â Paimon starts as you resign yourself to finishing Lyneyâs drink (Itâs your favorite, the one you always order), âor is Lyney acting weird around Y/N?â
Aether laughs. âThere's definitely something going on. Donât end up staying too long in Fontaine, now. What was it you told us? âA day or twoâ.â
You huff, your face turning unbearably warm. âShut up, you two. I am here to do research, not to find a summer fling.â Youâve already failed, but they donât need to know about that.
If you were to touch your lips with your fingers, youâd think of no one else but Lyneyâs hands on your hips and his mouth swallowing your words.
Lynette clears her throat, a quiet but noticeable thing. âDonât be fooled by my brother, Y/N.â
âOh, donât worry. Iâm still keeping my safe distance.â
She shakes her head. âThatâs not what I mean. Donât be fooled by my brother.â She stares at you from the rim of her cupâsomething about that has you listening obediently. âNo matter what he tells you, he always cares too much. No matter what you may think, he always gets hurt first.â
âThatâs notâŠâ You canât imagine that. From the start, itâs always felt like he was the one who could do what he wanted.
No tricks.
Lynette is his twin, after all. She knows him best.
No strings.
Defeated, you sip on the straw with the same fervor of an aggravated hilichurl, and thatâs the end of that.
Conversations during breakfast are much lighter when Lyney returns with a full meal as his treat. Celebration, he says. Celebration for what? Who knows? Lyney winked, but his glance directed to you said enough.
âYou say that you donât want to get attached, but youâre awfully close to the Traveler, of all people,â Lyney says offhandedly once the others have left for their own matters.
You lean against your seat, grinning. âAre you jealous?â
He doesnât say anything, instead upturning his nose as if scrambling to regain control. You laugh, oddly endeared. Lyney turns his head away, trying to hide the smile that curls his lips upon hearing it.
âHey,â Lyney says seriously, reaching for your hand. âWhere have you been yesterday?â
âWhy? Missed me?â
And because heâs Lyney, he takes his time kissing each of your knuckles. Itâs more intimate than the whole âno stringsâ arrangement you agreed on, but you suppose Lyney thinks that any physical attention is free reign. âWhat would you do if I said yes?â
âYouâll be fine,â you say slyly. âYouâll have to get used to it if you want to risk your heart just to get laid.â
He rolls his eyes, tugging you closer. âIâm not risking anything to get laid. Do you think so lowly of yourself, chĂ©rie?â
âIsnât this all there is to it? Physical attraction,â you ask, genuinely confused.
Lyney blinks. âOf course, butââ His eyes flicker down, and his words trail off.
When you speak, you feel your breath bounce back from his skinâa testament to your proximity. âLyney,â you whisper. For what? Urging him to continue? Urging him to close this distance? Youâre not sure, either.
You have so much to ask. What do you mean? Why canât you finish your sentence? Why donât you just kiss me already? But itâs hard to speak; Lyneyâs name is all you can think of.Â
You whisper his name again. His grip on your hands tightens and loosens, a frustrated frown creeping up his brows.
Your hand shoots out to reach for the back of his head and give in. He flinches for a second before relaxing completely.
His lips almost taste sweeter than his words. Almost as sweet as how he finds purchase on your waist and holds your chin during every kiss.
You pull away to breathe, missing how he leans closer to chase after you and pouting when he canât. âYeah. ThatâThat didnât have to mean anything. I just wanted to know what it felt like again.â
âYeah.â Lyney licks his lips, his gaze unable to tear away from where yours are swollen. âYeah, I know. You taste like my drink.â
Really, no oneâs surprised you gravitate towards each other again, feeling like youâre soaring and melting into a puddle at the same time. Lyney doesnât touch you where you both know would cross the line, but he grips near possessively to what he can, as if breathing you in and worshipping your skin.
You know after this, heâd go back on stage, fooling his audience with whatâs invisible to the average eye, as if this never happened. You know this because this is your deal: satiate the feverish attraction you have with each other and leave once youâre satisfied. (But you also know that youâll be thinking of his touch and his lips while you stare at the vase beside your bed.)
Lyney is a magician, first and foremost.
He hooks you in, and keeps all your attention to himself like heâd die without it. Then he disappears with a snap of a finger. Heâs finished his trick, leaving you befuddled in your seat with more questions than answers.
As you drift off to sleep, all you can think of is that there are two roses now.
âBrother.â
Lyney looks up from where heâd been entertaining Rosseland, seeing Lynette with a stern face. âWhat? What happened?â
Her tail flicks. âYou said you werenât going to get attached.â
Lyney exhales softly, his eyes slipping shut. âIâm not.â
Lynette finds herself smiling softly. âI may just be your assistant, but you canât lie to your own twin.â
He buries his face in his hands. With his sight gone, images of your face while whispering his name flash in his mind. His eyes fly open, mortified, his whole face red. âI donât know how it happened. I didnât think itâd be deeper than that.â
He was the magician in this, but it felt as if you were the one who tricked him instead.
Itâs been two weeks since you first arrived in Fontaine. By this point, youâve grown more familiar with its views than your own city. Having Aether, Paimon, Lynette, and even Freminet around doesn't make it any easier for you to feel at home.
And then thereâs the Lyney Situation. You meet up most nights, more than that when heâs free from shows. He keeps seeking you out, and you keep letting him in. There was one night where Lyney spent the night instead of heading straight to the doorâand those nights turned into two, then three, and then he finds any excuse to keep doing it.
Itâs not like you could stop. He told you look for me if you want more, and you always want more, because how could you not? Lyney treats you like heâs never had to take care of anything more precious but still manages to render you breathless like youâve never experienced thrill the way he gives it to you before.
But you still have to go back home. And Lyney still has his own life, has his secrets. He feels untouchable even when your arms are wrapped around his neck.
No strings attached can still work for summer flings, doesnât it? And what are summer flings, if not just that?
Lyney hovers above with his hands caging your face. Heâs grinning so wideâand youâve seen all kinds of smiles on him with your time spent together, but it was never this genuine.
âYouâre bad for me.â He says it like a confession, a prayer.
You raise an eyebrow. âWhat did I do to you?â
His hand trails down until heâs rubbing shapes on your hips. âMake me feel like Iâm myself whenever Iâm with you.â
At your silence, Lyney clears his throat. âBut itâs not like that, donât worry. I just meanââ
And how does that even make sense? He pours his heart, then later reveals itâs nothing but a decoy to keep this facade realistic.
âOh,â you say.
That was the final act youâd been waiting for. The final trickâthe farewell show.
And so you pack your bagsâshoved your sketchbook back inside, face forward, and promise not to look back. Leaving Sumeru hasnât even been this hard.
Aether and Paimon shouldnât be surprised if they find you missing; theyâd been the first to know that your stay in Fontaine isnât meant to last forever. And youâve warned Lyney about this. Avoiding attachments? It felt more like running away from your problem.
Lyney is a busy man on his own; youâre nothing but some architect from a different region who happened to get caught up with him at the right time.
You sigh and call for the aquabus.
A hand clasps around your wrist, pulling you to collide against a familiar chest. Lyneyâs eyes are wide, almost insane. Sweat clings to his forehead, and his breath comes in frantic pants.
âW-Whatââ
Lyneyâs eyes search your face. Or maybe itâs him trying to convince himself that youâre right there, in front of him. âYou didnât even tell me.â
âIâIâm sorryââ
âWere you just going to leave like that? Donât you think I at least deserve a farewell?â
âLyney, Iâm sorry. I know, that was stupid.â You havenât seen him with an expression like this beforeâso raw and broken, begging to be glued together with your hands. âI didnât want to formally say goodbye because I knew I'd want to stay.â
âThatâs stupid,â he repeats in agreement.
You breathe shakily, eyes scanning the stunned crowd. Whatâs The Great Magician Lyney doing here? Holding some stranger in his arms? That must be what theyâre thinking.
âHow did you even know I was leaving?â
Lyneyâs eyes cut down to his hand, gripping a crushed rose. âI was paying a visit to an empty room.â Embarrassed, he tries to toss it away, but you take it before he can.
You wordlessly place it in its home: the spot behind your ears. You donât tell him that the two other roses he gave you serve as bookmarks in the sketchbook youâve used all up in Fontaine. Where youâve drawn his face more often than not.
Lyney groans in frustration, his hands curling around your waist. âIs staying so bad?â
âItâs not like Iâm leaving forever.â
And then you notice Lyneyâs hands. Theyâre shaking uncontrollably, not unlike how it did during that incidentâand with it came the frantic exhales, as if natural human breathing alone is already hard enough for him.
âOh, Lyney,â you say softly. You drop your bags and embrace him fully.
He doesnât hesitate in pulling you closer, burying his face on your neck. âDonâtâdonât,â he gasps, âdonât just try to leave like that.â
Itâs hard seeing Lyney like this. Heâs usually so composed and easy-going. He gulps in a deep breath, and his voice cracks as he calls for you. This must be something out of his controlâsomething deeper than the back of his stage.
âY/N,â he whispers.
âLyney,â you call back as gently.
He swallows your surprised noise with his mouth, moving against you like youâre his last meal on Teyvat. Heâs still shaking, but it has subsided the longer you stay pressed against each other. Youâre not sure if itâs his Pyro vision or if itâs your skin burning at the thought of Lyneyâs skin against yours. Itâs searing.
This is different from the last kisses you shared.
Passion, you think dizzily, breathless from his hunger. This is passion.
âWhat was that for?â you ask, embarrassingly winded.
Lyney brushes his thumb over your bottom lip. He looks sad. As though he only comes alive when youâre with him. âA kiss to make up for your absence in the following weeks.â
âI can always come back,â you say. âNo, I will come back. I promise. I just need to get home for a bit.â
âOkay.â Lyney nods, exhaling heavily. âYeah. I know, I understand. Once you come back, come straight to me, alright?â
âOf course.â You lean in to kiss his cheek. Youâve never done it before because it always came off too intimate. And judging by the blush that explodes on his face, he thinks the same.
It all doesnât matter. The line has been crossed days ago; youâve just been turning away from seeing it.
He kisses you again. Then again. âHave a safe trip,â he says in between kisses. âI almost wish you commissioned me to escort you, regardless of the price.â
âWhat, you want 500,00?â The aquabus has arrived; Lyney grips you a little tighter, childishly willing himself not to see it.
â500,000 kisses, and more.â Lyney rests his forehead against yours, his captivating eyes keeping you still, the way it always does. âBut you can give me that when you come back.â
( Before they were taken away from the stage for an investigation, Lynette comes up to her brother and asks, âWhat happened back there, Lyney? I thought you were about to twist your own fingers.â
He is unsure how to tell his sister that he saw your awed expression and nearly lost his wits.
âIt was nothing,â Lyney admits, his face growing hot at recalling his slip-up.Â
It wasnât out of embarrassment, noânot when the memory of your wide-eyed beaming expression and how his mind blanked along with the skip of his heart plagued his mind.
âIt was nothing,â he repeats numbly. Itâs not. It was the start of something. )
a/n ok just a quick rant this fic BROKE ME. it was like every other day i hated then loved writing this fic. im not used to writing fics this long so pacing is not my forte </3 but i just feel proud of myself for finishing this so HOPE U LIKED IT. if ure still reading until here ily â€ïž
more a/n two lyney fics and two kissing scenes. i canât even lie to myself. everyone can tell.
more more a/n it was halfway through writing this fic that i rewatched the magic show and only noticed lyneys hands were shaking and i GOT SO SAD OMF đđđđ