Wonbin Being Too Scared To Go On Rides. He Hasnt Liked Them Since A Little Boy—hes Never Been On One

a perfect fit | zhang hao

pairing: campus crush! zhang hao x reader

genre: fluff

word count: 3409

warnings: minor swearing probably?  lowercase intended, not proofread

prompts: 4. "what do you want?" "you" 5. "i want to help you, so please, let me." 11. "is that my sweater?"

notes: combined a hao prompt request (i changed the phrasing of 4 a little bit IMSORRY) with a campus crush! hao request and came up with this,,, honestly longer than i was expecting and somehow shorter than i wanted it to be ?? idk.. anyways geology major! hao you are dear to me (i want him so bad i'm clawing at the walls of my enclosure) hope you all enjoy <3

college was stressful. you knew it would be, it had to be expected. but what you didn’t expect was that the hardest part wasn’t the coursework or the seemingly constant stack of homework sprawled across your desk; it was actually paying attention in your classes.

how were you supposed to focus on mantle convection when three rows down was arguably the prettiest boy you had ever seen in your whole life. zhang hao.

you only had a few classes together, but coincidentally, due to your wandering eyes those happened to be the classes you were falling behind in. and he was to blame. 

truth be told, it seemed everyone had some sort of campus crush on the boy; between the way he dressed and carried himself and the way he always managed to be at the top of every class, just about everyone either wanted to be him or be with him. and you couldn’t blame them in the slightest. 

zhang hao was someone to admire from afar; across the lecture hall or the path between buildings. so when he ended up in a study group you had joined in an attempt to graduate with a respectable grade, you were dumbfounded, what was someone like him doing in a study group for a class he was passing with flying colours? maybe it was charity work, you convinced yourself.

the study group was only so effective for you, with zhang hao in the group you couldn’t focus, yet again. it was too hard to not notice the way he fidgeted with the pen in his hand or the way he doodled small animals in the corners of the paper. or the way he leaned over a fellow classmate as he helped them with a particularly complicated question in the textbook. 

you were doomed.

——

after a few weeks of no progress, you were just about to give up. maybe i’ll just drop out and work at a department store or something. you told yourself as you crouched down outside the library you all studied in. 

sure, you were being a little dramatic. but you were one question away from bursting into tears as you walked out of the study group an hour early. the embarrassment of leaving paled in comparison to crying in front of the boy who had been your reason to showing up to class some days. 

“are you okay?” the question pulled you out of your pity party, looking up to see the tall male in front of you. he gave you a worried look at your curled up frame leaned against the brick. “i’m just feeling a little stupid,” you tried to laugh, a dry husk of humour pushing past your lips.

the boy didn’t respond right away, opting to crouch beside you as he sat down on the concrete right next to you. if you weren’t so stressed about your academics right now, you probably would’ve been a stuttering mess at the close proximity. maybe you would’ve even noticed the scent of his cologne. but all you could do in that moment was frantically wipe your eyes and attempt to not look as pathetic as you felt. 

his eyes softened as he watched your hands rest on top of your knees, “you’re not stupid,” he said, a sweet tone in his voice, comforting even, “it’s a difficult class, everyone has been struggling.” his kind words tugged at your heart more than you’d care to admit.

“but everyone else seems to be getting it eventually.” you sniffled, concentrated on the tears threatening to spill again, “and i just keep slipping further and further behind.” you let out a heavy sigh, “i’m never gonna catch up at this rate.” 

you almost forgot the boy was even sitting there, silently listening to your troubles. “shit sorry,” you let out a pitiful laugh, “i didn’t mean to drag you into being my therapist.” 

he shook his head, a smile spreading across his face, “it’s okay, i’m glad you told me.” he turned his head towards you, “how about we make a deal?”

you only tilted your head in curiosity, urging him to continue his train of thought.

“you let me tutor you from now until exams. if you pass, then we both win, and if you don’t, then at least you tried your best.” 

the offer was sweet, but you couldn’t help but wonder why zhang hao of all people would take time out of his days to tutor you.

“what’s in it for you?” you let a small smile break out across your face, the first in what felt like weeks. 

“well,” he pretended to ponder for a moment, “maybe i just want to pass my knowledge onto someone.” you couldn’t help but laugh at the reason as he continued.

“and maybe, this can double as a way to make a new friend, if you’d want.”

sure. “friend” had no real implications of anything beyond a good acquaintance. but you almost choked at the disbelief. the university’s sweetheart, zhang hao wanted to be your friend? the boy you had spent the better part of the last two months trying to tear your eyes off of while your professor droned on about chemical reactions and the composition of rocks.

“are you sure? i don’t wanna take up too much of your time and-“ he cut you off before you could finish. “i wouldn’t offer it if i wasn’t sure,” he smiled gently, “i want to help you, so please, let me.”

you pondered the offer for a moment again. maybe it was the prospect of spending more time with him, or maybe it was just the idea of finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel that was this class, but you had made up your mind.

“deal.” your smile widened as you stuck out a hand, his own coming out to shake yours as he mirrored your expression. 

this was going to be interesting.

——

your one on one study sessions had only been going on for a few weeks but you were already starting to grasp the concepts more with zhang hao’s help. “just call me hao.” you recall him insisting on multiple occasions, unaware of the way your brain would try and twist the intimacy behind it. just friends, you had to remind yourself, that was all you two would ever be, and that was honestly more than you ever could have expected. 

“hao,” the name rolling off your tongue, “it’s getting late, can’t we wrap this up?” you whined, pouting a little in hopes of getting sympathy from the boy. as smiley as he was, he was also quite the hard-ass when it came to studying.

“one more question and then we can be done for tonight, deal?” he smiled, gesturing to the last practice question from this page. you let out a huff as you mumbled an acceptance of the deal, grabbing your pencil once again as you wrote out the explanation, scouring your brain for the scientific phrases to communicate your thoughts. 

zhang hao looked over your final answer with a content hum, his hand coming over to ruffle your hair, “good job, you’re getting the hang of this.” 

you stiffened at the contact and praise, you had never really gotten validation like that, especially not from someone like him, and your brain was running with it. 

when you originally agreed to this arrangement you hoped that maybe it would be your way to get over your little campus crush on the boy sitting next to you, but it had only gotten worse, and you were slowly losing it. taking a moment to shake the thoughts from your mind, you started gathering your stuff up to leave, as was zhang hao. 

“don’t forget you’re stuck with me tomorrow too, y/n!” he chuckled lightly before saying his farewells and leaving first, rushing off to meet up with his friend; you were sure he mentioned his name once before, ricky maybe? something like that.

you only nodded as you waved, grabbing your jacket off the back of the chair and slinging your backpack over your shoulder, but then something caught your eye; a light blue hoodie draped across the back of the back of the chair next to you. zhang hao’s sweater. the boy was already long gone, and based on how often he was sporting the hoodie, you assumed it was one of this favourites, so you couldn’t just leave it here. “i’ll just give it back to him tomorrow.” you mumbled to yourself, picking up the sweater and resting it over your arm.

when you got back to your dorm you folded the sweater nicely on your desk, right in your view so you wouldn’t forget it tomorrow. as much as you tried to ignore it, that night you couldn’t help but notice the warm citrus scent of his cologne, and you swore you could smell it in your dreams that night.

——

the next day was a brisk spring day, the warm air having been replaced by a crisp, almost cold, breeze. to say you had not dressed properly was an understatement, you thought to yourself as you walked across the campus towards the library. in a moment of weakness as you called it, or rather a moment of strong winds, you took it upon yourself to throw the pale blue hoodie over your frame. he wouldn’t mind too much right?

sitting at your usual table in the library, you set up your many papers and textbooks, not paying attention as the boy you had grown close to approached the table, a little out of breath. 

“sorry i’m late,” he breathed out, catching his breath after seemingly running here. 

“it’s okay, i was early,” you laughed, finally looking up at the boy who’s cheeks were flushed light pink.

you watched as his gaze traced your figure, taking notice of the sweater you were wearing, “is that my sweater?”

now it was your turn to flush a shade of pink, trying to form a sentence as you stuttered through excuses, “oh, i’m sorry,” an awkward laugh escaped your lips, “it’s just you left it here yesterday and so i was bringing it to give back to you but it was colder outside than i thought it was and so i put it on on the way here without really thinking, i can give it back right now,” you barely stopped to take a breath, “or i can go wash it and then give it back if you’d prefer.” your train of thought was stopped by his hand on top of yours, your mind going from a million miles a minute to frozen solid in mere moments. 

“it’s okay y/n,” he chuckled at your flushed expression as he sat down next to you, “it looks cute on you anyways.” he said simply, moving his gaze to the textbooks in front of you as he flipped to the pages you were on the day before. 

this boy was going to be the death of you.

——

something in the air seemed to change after that day, and it wasn’t just the scent of the blooming cherry blossoms in the breeze. something had changed with you two, and perhaps that was how the two of you ended up in your dorm room rather than the library, and on a saturday of all days. 

“what homework have you got for me today teacher zhang hao?” you joked, leaning back on the arms as you sat on the end of your bed, looking at the boy who sat comfortably in your desk chair.

“aren’t i allowed to just hang out with my friend without talking about plate tectonics?” he said, a joking sarcasm lacing his tone. 

you only laughed in response as you tried to control your heart beating out of your chest at the simple, friendly, term. 

before you knew it, the day had faded into night in a blur of laughter and conversation; real conversation. it was a nice change of pace, and as much as you hated to admit it, the more you got to know him, the more your campus crush had changed into just a genuine crush. 

you tried to ignore it, but it was so hard to ignore the comfort you felt being around him, how easy it was to slip into conversations and how easy he made you laugh. how were you supposed to not think about that.

and much to the dismay of your heart, these weekend hangouts had become a sort of routine. on top of seeing him most weeknights at the library, your interactions had spilled into the weekends quite seamlessly. whether it was just having a movie night in your dorm room, wandering campus during sunset, or even just doing normal young adult things like going shopping. the two of you had even gotten into the habit of accompanying each other on errands just to keep the other company. 

it was nice, you couldn’t lie, but the domestic activities made it that much harder to separate your romantic and platonic feelings for the boy. 

and here you were, awaiting the arrival of the boy on a saturday night. every time your phone lit up you rushed to grab it, just in case it was from hao, the casual name becoming more natural over the weeks.

this time it actually was a message on your screen, you found yourself quickly unlocking your phone to see what it said. “i’m going to stop at the store on my way over,” the text read, “do you want anything?”

before the voice of reason in your head could object, you typed back a quick response, “you.” simple, straight forward, to the point. everything you weren’t. it was already too late to cover up your boldness as you watched the typing bubble appear, in sync with the wave of anxiety and near nausea that washed over you.

“you think you can afford me?” he joked back, rolling with the conversation more smoothly than you ever could have, evidently. you typed back a quick laugh, hoping he wouldn’t see the truth behind your original response, “probably not, maybe i’ll just take some gummy worms.” you replied before nearly throwing your phone across the cramped room. 

and to think, you were stuck with him all night.

——

you tried to focus on the movie, you really did, but the all too familiar feeling of wandering eyes and a racing heart took over your senses, and who could blame you? it wasn’t every day you found yourself sharing a blanket with the prettiest and kindest boy you’d ever known. you almost wondered if he could feel the heat radiating from you, or if he would just blame it on the fuzzy blanket covering your legs. you hoped it would be the latter.

soon enough the credits were rolling and you finally pulled yourself from the thoughts spinning around your mind, just in time for hao to turn to you with a smug smile. “you didn’t pay attention to any of that movie, did you?”  the question caught you so off guard you actually choked a little on the sharp intake of breath. was it that obvious? you wondered. you really had to work on your expressions it seems. 

“what’s on your mind y/n?” the smooth, almost teasing tone in his voice would’ve probably made your knees give out had you not already been sat down in your bed.

you managed to stutter out a response, rather reminiscent of the first real conversation you two had months prior. “oh it’s, uhm,” you quickly tried to come up with a believable excuse, settling on possibly the worst one, “it’s nothing.” the stiff laughter did nothing to help your case as he grinned at you knowingly, hopefully not too knowingly. 

“so i’m nothing now?” he feigned offense as his hand came up rather dramatically to his chest. “i thought i meant more to you than that, y/n.” he teased, obviously enjoying watching the gears turn in your brain as you attempted to process the conversation that was happening.

busted.

there was no coming back from it now and you knew it, and more importantly, he knew it. at some point he had picked up on your lingering gaze, your quick glances that you thought had gone unnoticed. all there was left for you to do was either admit your growing feelings, or play dumb about the whole thing. and somehow you decided the latter was the smartest option. 

“i, uh, don’t know what you’re talking about.” another forced laugh pushed past your lips, getting past your thumping heart on the way out. 

it seemed that your reaction filled zhang hao with a new sense of confidence, because he did the last thing you expected him to do; lean in. not close enough for your lips to graze each other, but close enough to feel his breath on you, to feel the heat radiating off of your faces. close enough to feel the thick tension in the air, but you were sure anyone could feel that if they were here, you could even cut it with a knife.

“i think you know exactly what i’m talking about,” he smiled, your eyes darting down to his lips that were only a couple inches from your own before looking back to his eyes; warm and inviting. 

you weren’t sure what to say anymore, and so you made the bold decision to close the gap; only briefly, but long enough to taste the cherry lip balm that coated his lips, to feel the way his lips fit against yours. like tectonic plates.

what started as one chaste kiss turned into 2, and then 3, and then a gentle kiss of yearning, of waiting, accompanied by his soft hands on your cheeks. you couldn’t help but lean into his touch, his soft hands feeling like silk against your burning skin. you could feel him smile into the kiss as your body eased, relaxing into a rhythm. time slowed and suddenly the two of you were the only people in the world, the boy in front of you filling all of your senses. zhang hao. zhang hao. zhang hao. your brain echoed as you pulled away, giddy smiles plastered across both of your faces.

“is that what you were on about?” you smiled, your voice barely above a whisper as your eyes flickered between his lips and his eyes once again.

he let out a small laugh, “what do you think?” he sat back against the wall once again, admiring the way the glow from the tv illuminated your skin, and the way you couldn’t wipe the grin off your face. “i thought you’d never do something about it.” he laughed again, this time grabbing your hand lazily.

“listen,” you started, “i didn’t think you noticed, and i was okay to keep it that way,” you looked down at your interlocked hands, your mind silently replaying the last 5 minutes on a loop, rendering yourself no better than a broken record. “you’re the zhang hao, everyone has at least a bit of a crush on you, so why would i assume i had any chance.”

he shook his head as a proud smile spread across his face, “everyone?” he asked, leaving you to lightly smack his arm, a small yelp coming from the boy. “okay okay, no need to smack me,” he laughed, “but really, you thought you didn’t have a chance? why would i have offered to tutor you if i didn’t have at least a bit of an interest in you?”

you let yourself ponder for a moment, looking back on the now distant memory. “i just thought you were being nice!” you stated matter-of-factly, earning another giggle from the boy, you could get used to that sound, or rather, being the reason behind it.

he merely smiled, pressing another kiss to your lips, “well i’m not nice like this to anyone else, if that helps make it more clear.”

“good,” you mirrored his smile, taking in the beauty that was the boy in front of you, the boy who seemed to fit with you like the tectonic plates.

“because i don’t think i could handle the idea of you spending your wednesday nights talking about rocks with anyone else.” 

Space & Time || P. SH

❀ pairing: roommate!sungho x implied fem!reader

❀ genre: roommates to lovers, college!au, fluff, minor angst

❀ word count: ~6.1k

❀ warnings: explicit language, minor jealousy, literally one implication of queer!sungho

❀ summary: The space that you share with Park Sungho sometimes feels a little too small. In time, the closeness proves to grow into something neither of you can contain. But hey, that's the case for all roommates...right?

❀ a/n: Once again, my writer's block went craaaazy for this piece. I spent so long hating it, but now I actually really love it! I feel like the style is a little different from what I usually do, so I hope you enjoy. As always, likes, reblogs, and replies are encouraged!

masterlist

Truthfully, Park Sungho is the perfect roommate. It doesn’t matter that sometimes he sings a little too loud in the shower because at least his voice is melodious. It doesn’t matter that sometimes he scolds you for leaving a dirty dish out because he laughs with you equally as much. It doesn’t matter that he frequently has his friends over, because they are always polite and include you in every outing. 

Park Sungho is perfect, almost a little too perfect. 

You first start to realize after coming home one night, two years into living together. Your feet are aching from your nice heels and your ears are ringing from the car horns on the street. It’s enough to have you entering your apartment with a sigh, kicking off your heels the minute you can see your welcome mat. 

“You’re home early,” Sungho says as you round the corner, standing up to greet you in that overly respectful manner of his. “How was it?”

The question instantly has tears springing to your eyes, stinging your corneas as if they were poisonous. Sungho is clearly panicked by your change in demeanor, flailing slightly as he approaches. His coos and attempts to shush you just make your tears turn into sobs, throwing your head back as you finally let all of your pent up emotions out. 

“It was horrible,” you hiccup. 

For a moment, Sungho flails once again. But then you’re encased by strong arms, a hand on the back of your head guiding you to lean into an overly wide shoulder. He smells faintly of clean laundry and sea salt, the latter due to the undertone in the cologne he constantly wears. A large hand smooths down the expanse of your exposed back, palms cool against the heat of your skin. You let your tears flow into the cotton of his shirt, feeling comfortable for the first time all night. 

“Come on, let’s sit down.”

Sungho doesn’t let go as the two of you move, waddling your way through your shared apartment. Instead of pulling you down to sit next to him, Sungho gathers you so that you’re seated straddling his lap, face still tucked into his shoulder. It’s an intimate position, far too intimate for mere roommates, but you’re too distracted by your sobs and the feeling of Sungho’s cool hands on your back to care. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Sungho coos, voice melodious and overly soft. 

You just shake your head, not trusting your voice. It was simple, actually, why your date went so horribly. One ill-timed glance at his phone revealed a slew of texts from someone saved under the name “wifey.” The man then proceeded to point out all of your insecurities, no doubt comparing you to whoever that contact was. He ended up taking a “work call”, leaving the date early and making you responsible for the hefty bill. 

“That’s fine,” Sungho soothes. “He doesn’t deserve you, anyways. You are such a catch and he doesn’t even know what he’s missing.”

You sniffle slightly, finally moving from your position buried in Sungho’s shoulder. He smiles when the two of you make eye contact, using his thumb to wipe a few stray tears from your cheeks. You’re sure that you look a mess, face ruddy with your makeup in various states of disarray. But the way Sungho is smiling at you makes you feel like the most beautiful person in the world. 

“You’re just saying that because you’re my roommate,” you whisper. 

“I’m saying it because it’s true.”

A moment of silence lingers in the small space between the two of you, with the occasional hiccup interrupting your peace. Sungho’s gaze is too intense, peering into the depths of your eyes. For a moment, you find yourself getting lost in the eye contact, taking note of the deep hue of his irises. It’s only when you feel a slight fluttering in your chest that you snap out of it. 

“I’m going to go shower and get out of these clothes,” you say as you stand, mindful of the way your halter top shifts across your chest. “But maybe we can watch a movie after that?”

Sungho smiles softly. “Yeah, that sounds nice.”

Something shifts between you and Sungho after that moment. 

It’s almost as if you’ve both unlocked a deeper level of comfort with each other, making physical contact in ways that you never had before. You spend your movie nights cuddling instead of sitting on opposite ends of the couch. You greet each other with hugs when either of you comes home, Sungho even going as far as to place a kiss on your cheek or forehead in friendly greeting. He’ll place a hand on your lower back as he passes by you in the kitchen, or squeeze your exposed thigh when the two of you are seated next to each other. 

You don’t think much of it, knowing that it’s nothing more than a few friendly touches between roommates. Sungho had seen you at a particularly vulnerable moment, and now seeks to comfort you. There’s nothing wrong with that! Roommates can hold hands in the grocery store and hug each other tightly after a long day. 

It’s how you find yourself snuggled up to Sungho’s side during a movie night, head leaning on his shoulder. It’s one of the few times that the two of you aren’t alone, surrounded by some of Sungho’s closest friends that you equally adore. They sit in various places strewn around the living room, leaving you and Sungho seated alone on the loveseat in the corner. 

About halfway through the movie, Woonhak complains about being hungry, causing a heated debate to erupt about what snacks everyone wanted. Through the commotion, you feel a set of sharp eyes on you. When you look to the side, you find Sanghyuk’s gaze trained on the points where you and Sungho are connected. It’s a simply observational gaze, his eyes holding no hint of judgment as he regards you. But, the intensity of his gaze makes your skin crawl. 

Under Sanghyuk’s scrutiny, you begin to peel yourself away from Sungho’s side. But before you can get far, a hand guides your head to lean back onto his shoulder. A quick glance upwards reveals that Sungho is still in the heated snack debate, not having blinked an eye at your movement. It’s almost as if he moved reflexively, not even having to think about drawing you closer. 

When you look back at Sanghyuk, the boy is smirking, simply rolling his eyes before he looks away. You try your best to fight the heat that is beginning to rise to your cheeks, to no avail. 

At some point between a new round of popcorn being distributed, and everyone settling back into their seats, you fall asleep. You have no idea how much time has passed as a soft hand shakes you awake. An ache overtakes your neck muscles as you straighten up, pulling back to see Sungho smiling down at you. A quick scan of the room reveals that it’s empty save for the two of you, causing you to cock an eyebrow in confusion. 

“Where’s everyone else?” You slur out, voice thick from sleep. 

“They left. It’s almost midnight, pumpkin.”

Pumpkin, that’s new. Your sleep addled brain doesn’t have the capacity to question it, simply nodding in understanding. 

“You should go to bed,” Sungho whispers, tucking a stray piece of hair away from your face. 

You nod, still not moving from your position on the couch. As your eyes flutter closed once again, you hear a soft chuckle. It’s enough to startle you back awake, not surprised to see a shy smile painting Sungho’s face. It’s impossible to not note how handsome he looks at the moment, long hair in disarray from leaning back on the couch and clad in a large sweatshirt. You imagine that he would be much cozier than your bed, but your mouth can’t quite part to form those syllables. 

“Come on,” Sungho says softly, dragging you up from the couch by the arm. “Let’s get you to bed.”

.         .         .

At some point, it becomes strange to not be greeted by Sungho the minute you enter your shared apartment, especially since you both have shared your schedules with each other. The man should be home, but your persistent calls of his name are met with nothing but silence as you toe off your shoes. Venturing further into the apartment still reveals no signs of life, a truly odd sight. 

You round a corner to step into the small hallway that leads deeper into the space, only to collide directly with a solid expanse of skin. A strong arm reaches out to steady you as you stumble backwards, keeping you firmly upright. Sungho’s eyes are wide when you meet his gaze, clearly flustered by your sudden appearance. 

“Shit, are you okay?”

You are unable to respond, too engrossed in scanning the view in front of you. Sungho’s entire torso is exposed, the man clearly having forgone a shirt. Wide shoulders taper into an impossibly small waist, leaving you swallowing thickly as you note the pair of basketball shorts hanging low on his hips. It’s clear that he has just showered, hair still dripping down onto his torso in clear rivulets. You find yourself watching as one slides down a firm pectoral, making a trail in one of the multiple divets in his abdomen, until it’s finally absorbed by the fabric of his shorts. 

You shake your head a bit, trying to snap out of it. It doesn’t help that Sungho is still grasping your upper arm, the strength in his hand obvious despite the gentle hold. Suddenly, your mouth feels arid, as if a sandy sediment has coated its surface and sucked up all of the moisture. You imagine that Sungho’s body is coated in enough water to quench your thirst. 

…wait…what??

“I’m fine,” you rush out, clearing your throat of its obvious thickness. “Sorry for bumping into you.”

Sungho just smiles softly, finally releasing his grip on your arm. “It’s all good. I felt bad that I wasn’t around when you got back. I thought I timed my shower well.”

“Don’t worry about it. Are you going somewhere?”

A slight flush rises to Sungho’s cheeks, the man ducking his head slightly. His hand comes up to scratch the back of his neck, allowing a few residual drops to fall from his hair. It’s odd to see Sungho be anything other than confident and bold, the sudden change catching you firmly off guard. 

“Yeah, I’m actually going to go hang out with this girl Daeun. She’s in my astronomy class so we’re going to the observatory a few towns over to do some constellation research.”

“Oh! That sounds…” surprisingly romantic… “Nice. That sounds really nice.”

Sungho chuckles, a sheepish smile taking over his face. “Yeah, I’m excited. Oh, let me finish getting ready! I might come to you for outfit advice, if that’s okay.”

You nod slowly, plastering a smile on your face. “Of course it is.”

Your chest feels tight as Sungho retreats, disappearing into his bedroom. As much as you try and ignore it, it continues to encompass you as you busy yourself with the latest episode of your favorite reality tv show. The pain doesn’t subside even as you try and immerse yourself in the latest drama. Instead, your face begins to heat and your palms begin to itch, almost as if craving to dig into something. Into what, you can’t quite determine, but you imagine it feels like milky smooth skin pulled taut over firm muscle. 

“How do I look?” Sungho asks with a little turn when he emerges from his room. 

Once again, you find yourself scanning his figure, taking in the way his jeans make his legs look impossibly long and how his shirt highlights the broadness of his shoulders. When the two of you first met, you used to joke about how Sungho needed to abandon his university endeavors to become a model. Times like now make it feel a little too real to be a joke. 

“Great,” you answer softly, ignoring the way your face burns. “You look great.”

Sungho looks absolutely giddy as he approaches the couch, leaning over to place a soft kiss on your forehead. The close proximity allows you to smell all the notes of his cologne, a scent that you have gotten used to transferring onto your clothes after every tight hug and cuddle session. The tightness in your chest returns, but this time it burns. 

“Thanks, pumpkin. I’ll be home late, so don’t wait up.”

Despite the man’s warning, you can’t find it in yourself to fall asleep. Instead, you remain awake in your bed, tossing and turning every few moments. Eventually, your body tires out, allowing you to slowly drift into slumber. If you dream of the mellow scent of sea salt and water droplets sliding across skin, that’s no one’s business but your own. 

.          .          .

The two of you part with a hug, Sungho gently pecking your forehead before heading off to his own class. You can’t fight the soft smile gracing your face as you approach your own building, your friend waiting for you near the entrance. 

Minji looks thoroughly perplexed as you approach, eyebrows drawn together in clear confusion. “Was that your boyfriend?”

The question makes you choke on your iced coffee, beginning to double over as a fit of coughs wrack your body. Minji doesn’t even flinch at your dilemma, still staring at the spot where you and Sungho had previously stood. 

“Holy shit, no!” You exclaim through a slew of coughs. “He’s just my roommate.”

The two of you move to enter the building, but Minji’s confused gaze remains firmly locked on you. 

“You’re joking, right?”

“What? No!” You emphasize as you slide into your seat. “Sungho is really just my roommate.”

“Then why do you guys do…,” Minji makes a vague gesture with her hands, “that?”

“You mean hug?”

“And kiss!” Minji’s voice drops to a whisper as the professor announces the start of his lecture. “I mean, if I had anyone treating me like that, I would definitely think we’re dating.”

You roll your eyes. “We are not dating!”

Minji just looks you up and down, lips curling into a soft smirk. “Does he know that?”

Any retort you have dies instantly in your throat. He does know that. You and Sungho have never been anything other than roommates, close roommates, but roommates nonetheless. The friendship that you have developed via sharing a space will always be nothing more than just that. Besides, he’s clearly seeing that girl Daeun from astronomy, right?

The amalgamation of thoughts about your non-relationship with Sungho distracts you throughout your entire lecture. Before you know it, your professor is dismissing you and you frown at your notebook, empty save for the date scribbled in the top right corner. You bid Minji a goodbye, reminding yourself to text her later for the notes. 

As you exit the lecture hall, a familiar figure makes you stop in your tracks. Sungho’s silhouette is bathed golden by the mid afternoon sun, giving him a cherubian glow. His head is tilted back in laughter, hand covering his mouth. It’s not uncommon to see Sungho lost in laughter, but you wonder who could have him so giddy this time, especially since Jaehyun is nowhere to be seen. 

And that’s when you see her. 

She’s pretty, unbelievably so. Long dark hair cascades past her shoulders, falling down to her trim waist. Her rounded eyes are emphasized by the slight shimmer of gold eyeshadow, full cheeks painted delicately with blush. Her smile is powerful, rivaling the sunshine that covers the green. The worst part is that she looks so good next to Sungho, as if they were a proper couple. So this is the Daeun that Sungho took to go see the stars. 

A hot feeling blooms in your chest, forcing you to avert your eyes. It makes sense, of course, that Daeun would be gorgeous and Sungho would be smitten with her. It’s only right that Sungho would have a partner equally as amazing as he is. 

So why aren’t you happy for him? Why does your chest burn and why do your eyes sting? Why is there a lump in your throat that feels excruciatingly painful to swallow down? Why are your palms growing clammy despite the early springtime breeze cooling you to your core?

You push your spiral of thoughts to the side, letting your legs carry you away from the green as fast as possible. It’s impossible to focus on where you’re going, letting your body move on autopilot. It’s only when a familiar warmth and the smell of pastries overcome you that you exhale for the first time in what feels like forever. You breathe in the smell of freshly brewed coffee and exhale with a smile. 

“Y/N?” A voice calls from the register. “What are you doing here?”

You’ve always mentioned that Donghyun looks particularly cute in his work attire. His hair is kept back off his face with a visor, the brim of which is shaped like a fishtail. His aquamarine apron is tied tight around his waist, covered in stains from the busy shift he likely had. Even the glittery name tag pinned to his apron suits him, matching the overeager sparkle in his eye. 

“I just wanted to stop by for some coffee.”

Donghyun cocks an eyebrow at you before scanning the practically empty cafe. “It’s 4pm.”

“I know, but I just need a pick-me-up.”

There’s another moment of silence as Donghyun regards you. With the minimum chatter from cafe-goers, the silence almost feels awkward, Donghyun clearly pondering something before he chooses to reply. After a moment, he simply shrugs. 

“Alright, but I’m giving you half-caf! I honestly don’t feel like brewing an entire new pot of regular.”

In mere minutes, you’re sitting alone at a table by the window, a steaming mug warming your fingers. You choose to ignore the concerned glances that Donghyun shoots you from behind the coffee bar. He would probably ask about what’s bothering you, since you’re sure your crisis is painted all over your face. But that’s the exact problem—you have no idea what your crisis is. 

So what if Sungho has a new girl that he’s been seeing? It’s not like that affects you in any way. If anything, it’s expected, with his round eyes and overly caring nature. You’re sure most people 

would swoon at the mellow tone of his voice or at how quick he is to laugh at a joke. No one is immune to falling for the way he’s hyper-attentive as he listens or the way he squeezes a tad bit harder right before he’s about to release someone from a hug. 

So you’re not surprised at all that someone has fallen for Sungho, especially someone so pretty. It’s expected. So why does it hurt?

Once again, you force the question out of your mind, letting out a groan as you lean your head into your hands. The steam rising from the mug begins to heat your cheeks as you stare into it, warming you up in a way that you didn’t know you needed. Despite the burn in your chest and your clammy hands, it feels like the rest of your body is frozen over, forced to malfunction at the thought of Sungho and his new lover. 

Oh shit. You’re jealous. 

Your stomach twists and turns at the newfound revelation. It makes sense, of course, that you would fall for Sungho just like everyone else. He’s the epitome of a perfect gentleman. And with the constant touches, it’s hard not to crave that little something more. What would those ever so soft lips feel like against your own instead of your forehead or cheek?

But he has made it clear where he stands. Sungho is your roommate, no matter how much you crave for him to be more. He has Daeun. He chose Daeun. It should be easy to accept, but the swirling feeling in your gut says otherwise. 

You don’t know how long you spend in the cafe, letting time pass aimlessly as you remain lost in your thoughts. It’s only when your phone vibrates with a text that you are snapped back into reality. You don’t even have to look at it to know who it is, likely wondering about your whereabouts. After all, you’re usually home by this time, freshly showered and cuddled up with him as you chat over takeout. 

With another groan, you grab your stuff, taking your time to collect your belongings and shoot Donghyun an appreciative smile. He nods in return, shooting you a thumbs up that you’re sure is supposed to be a wish of good luck. 

He doesn’t even know how much you’ll need it. 

.         .         .

Meeting Daeun is even more tortuous than seeing her from afar. She’s even prettier up close, with a blinding smile and fluttering eyelashes. However, her beauty isn’t what strikes you the most. It’s how she’s hugging Sungho in the middle of your doorway that leaves you shocked. 

She’s clearly just saying goodbye, Sungho trapping her in one of his notorious hugs before she leaves. The sight has you frozen in place nonetheless, the grocery bag you were carrying now hanging lower in your slackened grip. Sungho seems to sense your presence as the two release from their hug, eyes lighting up as he sees you standing beyond the doorway. 

“Y/N! I didn’t know you’d be home so early,” he beams. “This is Daeun, my research partner.”

“Oh, this is Y/N?” The woman questions, shooting you a soft smile. “Nice to meet you.”

You force yourself to return the smile, although you’re sure yours comes out awkward with a hint of confusion. “You too.”

There’s a thick silence that ensues as Daeun regards the two of you. Her gaze flickers between you and Sungho a few times before she lets out a small chuckle, as if she knows something you don’t. At least you feel like you’re one step ahead of her, knowing that something’s going on between her and Sungho. You just didn’t quite expect to see it so clearly.

“Well I’m going to get going,” Daeun sings. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Sungho. Nice to meet you again, Y/N.”

The woman disappears down the hallway with a little wave, ponytail swaying behind her with every step. The minute she’s out of sight, Sungho moves forward, relieving you of the grocery bag that is basically on the floor at this point. He holds the door as you take slow steps forward, finally forcing your body to enter the apartment. As you slide off your shoes, Sungho ruffles your hair before moving to unpack the groceries. 

“So,” you begin, sitting on the countertop next to where Sungho is fussing over the various fruits that you had bought. “She’s cute.”

Sungho shoots you a confused look. “I mean, I guess.”

“You guess? Isn’t she like your girlfriend or something? I feel like you should think she’s cute.”

“Woah,” Sungho chuckles. “Where did you get that from?”

“What?”

“That she’s my girlfriend? She’s literally just my partner for my research project.”

You shrug, trying not to oogle the breadth of Sungho’s shoulders as he leans down to place an egg carton in the fridge.

“I just thought you two were close. And you look kinda cute together,” you mumble, beginning to swing your legs where they hang over the edge of the counter. 

Sungho stares at you incredulously. “Ummm…okay, I guess. She’s not really my type, though.”

“Really?” You hate the way your voice comes out in a rush of excitement. “I mean, um, I’m surprised. Like I said, you two look cute together.”

In the blink of an eye, Sungho is standing before you, slowly making space for himself in the vee of your legs. His palm is warm as he places it on your knee, right on top of the rip in your jeans. The new proximity has you leaning back a bit, only to be stopped by the wall behind you. You find yourself going a little cross eyed at the closeness, trying your hardest to maintain eye contact. Sungho just smiles, squeezing your knee softly.

“I mean it,” he mumbles. “I already have my eye on someone else, pumpkin.”

It feels as if the distance between the both of you is getting smaller by the second, some sort of invisible pull bringing you closer. At the last minute, Sungho leans upward, letting his lips gently peck your forehead. The warm sensation on your skin lingers, even as Sungho pulls back to shoot you another smile. 

“Welcome home, by the way.”

The man then retreats as if nothing happened, going back to unpacking the groceries. You don’t dare move from your position, heart still hammering in your chest. It takes a moment before you are able to exhale, your breath coming out short and shaky. If it weren’t for the stability of the counter underneath you, you’re sure you would have fallen over. It makes you wonder if Sungho would’ve caught you if you had. 

“So, what do you want to do for dinner?” Sungho calls over his shoulder, shooting you a small smile. “I’m really in the mood for sushi.”

.         .         .

You impatiently rap your knuckles against the heavy door in front of you, shifting your weight from foot to foot. Never before had you felt this sense of urgency, limbs feeling jittery with every passing moment that you spend standing still. It’s enough anxiety to have you running a marathon, and even then, you swear you would still have some anxious energy left. However, the minute that a confused face opens the door, you feel a bit of the tension leave your body. 

“Y/N?”

You smile sheepishly. “Hi, Sanghyuk. I need your help.”

You’ve always found Sanghyuk and Jaehyun’s shared apartment to be extremely homely. The two of them have arrays of stuffed animals and trinkets in every corner of the home, along with an assortment of fuzzy blankets in every nook and cranny. It’s cozy and calm, especially with the way it’s never quite silent. Usually Jaehyun is the culprit, either joking and laughing loudly or playing some music to set the vibe. 

But even now, as it’s just you and Sanghyuk in the space, the cozy feeling is amplified. You’re wrapped up in one of his fleece Pokémon blankets, cocooning yourself in warmth. It’s quiet for a moment, Sanghyuk never pushing you to speak before you’re ready. After a few deep breaths, you finally feel ready to open up. 

“I think I like Sungho.”

You expect something to shift in the moment, maybe for Sanghyuk to squeal in surprise or for the world to stop turning for a bit. But it’s nothing like that. Instead, Sanghyuk just continues to look at you, a neutral expression coloring his face. 

“Okay,” he murmurs softly. “Tell me more.”

And you do. It’s easy to confide in Sanghyuk, with his soft smiles and solemn nods. He listens as you pour your heart out, explaining everything from the first bit of physical contact after your shitty date to meeting Daeun in the apartment. As every piece of the story comes out, you feel your chest begin to grow lighter. 

“And now I’m here because I don’t know what to do.”

Sanghyuk just hums, clearly pondering your words before he speaks. “Well, are you going to tell him?”

“I can’t!” You all but whine, throwing your hands up in exasperation. “He’s just going to pity me and reject me and then it’s going to be weird when we have to see each other all the time. I mean, we live together.”

“What makes you so sure that any of these things are going to happen?”

“I don’t know.”

Sanghyuk shrugs. “Exactly, you don’t know. So what’s the harm in trying?”

You can’t help but groan, head beginning to pound at the mere thought of telling him how you feel. “But what if he hates me?”

“And what if he loves you?” 

What if Sungho loves you?

It’s hard to imagine, but for a moment you get a glimpse of what that would be like. Forehead kisses would trail down to meet your lips instead of just stopping there. Cuddles and hugs could turn into more meaningful touches. A hand on the waist would be a show of belonging, not just a hint of guidance. The man that you want would finally be yours. 

“I’m scared, Sanghyuk.”

The man across from you sighs, beginning to pick at the corner of his own blanket. “I know, but you’ll never know if you don’t try.”

“And Daeun?”

“Has Sungho ever lied to you?” Sanghyuk cocks an eyebrow when you shake your head no. “Exactly. You have no reason to believe he isn’t telling you the truth.”

You know that he’s right, just like he always is. It’s just hard to ditch the niggling feeling in the back of your brain that there’s something you don’t know. The glint in Daeun’s eyes and the surprise in Sungho’s had to have meant something. It had to. 

“I know that, but I just need to hear it. Can you please be 100% honest with me?” You ask softly, eyes firmly fixed on Sanghyuk. 

“I always am.”

“Does Sungho have a thing for Daeun?”

Sanghyuk chuckles. “No. Like he said, he has his eye on someone else.”

The phrase bounces around your head the entire walk home. Someone else could be anyone. It could be another person in his research class or one of his gym companions. It could be that one really cute guy that works at Donghyun’s cafe. It could be anyone. It could be you. 

As you unlock your apartment door, you’re greeted with the familiar sight of Sungho wiping down the kitchen counters. It’s a little thing he does, constantly cleaning and tidying to the point that it’s almost motherly. But his habit is endearing, especially as he scrunches his nose while scrubbing at a particularly stubborn stain. 

The minute he looks up, though, any trace of tension is gone from his face, melting into a soft smile. He’s quick to abandon the cloth he was using, approaching you with wide arms. The hug that he engulfs you in is all too tight, but you find it freeing rather than suffocating. However, the breath leaves your lungs when Sungho places a soft kiss on your forehead. 

“Welcome home, pumpkin,” he coos softly.

As you two part, you can’t help but stand frozen in place, a warm rush flooding your body. If Sungho notices, he doesn’t show it, choosing instead to go back to cleaning. Before you can stop it, the warmth travels upward, escaping your body before you can catch it. 

“I want you to mean it.”

The short phrase makes Sungho stop, turning back to you with a confused furrow in his brow. “Mean what?”

As much as you want to race to retract your words, Sanghyuk’s voice echoes in your mind. Someone else, you remind yourself. It could be you. You take a deep breath. 

“When you kiss me,” you explain, squeezing your eyes shut as embarrassment begins to color your cheeks. “I know it’s just on the forehead or cheek, but I want you to mean it.”

Sungho makes a confused little noise. “But I do mean it.”

“Not in the way that I want you to. Not in the way that I mean it.”

The silence that overcomes the room makes time tick by ever so slowly. What are mere seconds feel like hours as the two of you simply stand in the hallway, neither of you daring to say a word. Even though your eyes are closed, you can tell Sungho is shifting his weight back and forth, the motion making the floorboards creak slightly. 

“Y/N, I need to understand. How exactly do you want me to mean it?”

Somehow, the question gives you the energy to open your eyes, instantly sweeping them over Sungho’s form. The white tee shirt he wears is marred with splotches of water, likely from his earlier time cleaning. His hands are calloused as they run through his hair, grip permanently rough from spending too much time at the gym. There’s a bit of redness around his temples from what looks like the beginning of a blemish. He’s stunning like this. 

“I want you to like me the way I like you.”

Sungho’s confused expression deepens. “And what way is that?”

“Like more than a friend or roommate. I want you to like me romantically.”

The laugh that Sungho lets out comes as a surprise. It even surprises the man itself, it seems, based on the way he instantly covers his mouth with his hands. His eyes have grown wider in shock, gaze uncertain as it remains locked on you. But soon that all melts away, replaced with a subtle smirk. 

“I’m sorry, it’s just—who says I don’t already?”

The apartment seems to shrink around the two of you, compressing all of the air in the room. Even the hallway feels tighter, invisibly drawing you and Sungho closer together. It’s as if there was a shift in the space, in your space. 

“B-but, Daeun?” You manage to stutter out, trying to ignore the way that the walls are pressing in on you, forcing you closer to Sungho. 

It seems that your roommate is feeling similar effects, slowly stumbling towards you as well. 

“I told you,” he mumbles softly. “She’s just my research partner. I like someone else. Y/N, I like you.”

The apartment shrinks a little more.

“You do?”

Sungho nods, smiling sheepishly. “I have for like, two years now. I mean, I tried to show you! Why else would I be all over you like that?”

“Because you’re a touchy person?” You question, not sounding too convinced of yourself. 

“Because I like you, pumpkin.”

The space is finally completely compressed, you and Sungho now standing toe to toe. He feels so much broader like this, taking up his fair share of the newly tiny space. It’s dizzying to be pressed so close together, even though it’s far from the first time. Once again, you find that it’s freeing rather than suffocating.

“I thought you were just being a really good roommate.”

Sungho chuckles, the sound vibrating through both of your bodies. The closeness allows him to easily wrap an arm around your waist, his free hand tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear. He lets his hand trail downward, cupping your cheek. 

“I don’t think really good roommates would do this.”

As much as you have felt Sungho’s lips on your face, the feeling of him pressing a kiss to your mouth feels utterly foreign. His lips are made soft from his constant use of peach chapstick, rivaling your own soft pucker. The kiss is both just as quick and equally as gentle as his pecks to your forehead. When he pulls away, you can’t stop the small whine that escapes you. 

Your eyes flutter open, trying to tamp down the immediate feeling of embarrassment that floods your core. You don’t seem to be the only one, though, with Sungho’s cheeks taking on their own rosy hue. For a moment, the two of you are silent, letting the apartment around you expand and contract with every breath you take. 

“Sungho,” you whisper. 

It’s all it takes for Sungho to instantly reconnect his lips to yours, this time kissing you deeper. The hand around your waist pulls you impossibly closer, leaving no room between your bodies. It gives Sungho the leverage to lean over you slightly, letting his lips capture yours again and again. The feeling is dizzying. Never has Sungho’s touch electrified you so much. 

When you finally pull away, heavy panting fills the silence between you. It takes Sungho a moment to open his eyes, finally staring back at you with dark eyes. It’s different from the Sungho you’re so used to seeing, playful and easygoing. Instead, this Sungho desires. 

“So,” you can’t help but ask. “This means you don’t like Daeun, right?”

“Holy shit,” Sungho curses before breaking out into laughter.

His chuckles shatter the moment, both hands dropping down to his sides. It’s endearing to watch how his nose scrunches and his eyes squeeze shut. But honestly, you don’t know what is so funny. 

“Y/N, pumpkin,” Sungho begins in between chuckles. “Daeun has a girlfriend.”

Oh.

.FIN.

forget me not

(kaeya x reader)

he promises to take you out to dinner, but he never shows.

“Would you like to place an order now hon?” The waitress asks softly, making you look from your empty wine glass up to her soft eyes.

“Ah, if I can order another glass of wine that would be nice! I’m still waiting,” you look outside the big window next to you, seeing the sky much darker than when you first sat. “I’m sure he’ll arrive soon.” You turn back to her smiling, repeating the same thing for the fourth time for the past two hours trying to convince yourself more than her that he’ll show up. He always does.

“Of course, I’ll be back with the bottle in just a minute.” She nods, turning to get you more of what you requested.

You don’t remember the last time you drank, heck you don’t even drink much to begin with but it’s all you can do to kill time. You don’t want to eat without him and spoil your appetite, he will show up soon.

You know he’s busy, he’s the Captain of the Knights so it’s expected. When he proposes the idea of going out you couldn’t hide your excitement. Anything to do with Kaeya was your favorite.

You arrived at the restaurant the time he told you to be there, at 7pm. The clock reads 9:30 now but it’s ok, it’s understandable. He’s the captain of the Knights after all.

The lights surrounding the small restaurant eliminates the busy nightlife in Mondstadt. You eye the people who are passing by, smiling at the elderly people who walk with their significant others, the parents holding their children’s hands as their laughter fills the air. But your eye catches something from afar.

The familiar head of blue hair among the people walking by. Your stomach erupts with butterflies seeing him finally. Walking down the stairs to the main shopping area in Mondstadt. But as he inches closer you see he isn’t alone. He’s walking with someone, no. He’s holding onto someone who’s leaning on him.

Your eyes squint a bit, trying to see if what you’re seeing is correct. But you see him smiling with the woman next to him mixed in with everything else and your heart goes heavy.

You see his smile much clearer now that they both are closer, he has his arm hooked around hers, almost as if he is holding her upright to keep her from stumbling and she’s giggling at him, eyes wide looking up at him leaning into him as much as she can.

The two walk past the restaurant and down towards Diluc’s tavern, Kaeya didn’t even glance at the restaurant you were currently sitting in waiting for him. Not once, he kept his eyes on the girl the whole time.

You reach for your pocket watch with a heavy hand and flip it open, seeing the time 9:45 pm. Almost three hours, three whole hours and he’s with someone else. He forgot.

You quickly finish the last of your wine and blink. Did he actually forget?

You wave your waitress down when she passes you, making her stop.

“Actually, can I purchase a whole bottle of wine please?” You ask her and she nods, her smile falling a bit at your expression. Your eyes look glossy.

He promised you a night out after so long. You’ve both been so busy with work this sounded so nice but it was too much to ask for apparently. He had more important matters.

Diluc makes his way down the street to his tavern and spots you sitting alone in the restaurant. Glass of wine in hand and solemn look on your face.

His eyebrows furrow. “Why are they out alone right now?” He thinks.

Part of him wants to stop and check in, but part of him knows to not get into people's business. He doesn’t want to sadden you further by making you talk about it. But if he makes another run in a while and still sees you in there, he'll stop by.

Diluc pushes the door to his tavern open, his eyes fall on Kaeya and Amber helping a woman who is belching into a bag, Amber is rubbing her back and Kaeya is holding napkins for her. This makes Dilucs mouth from the line. ”What's going on?” he thinks.

“I got her from here. I’ll take them Barbara just in case.” Amber helps the woman up to her feet and walks to the door, Diluc holds it open for them.

“Thank you, I'll make sure to check in with Albedo and Jean tomorrow.” Kayea waves her off, eye falling on an unamused looking Diluc.

“Your plus one got sick?” Diluc speaks up, making Kaeya’s smile drop.

“Not my plus one, a subordinate.” Kaeya answers flatly, not even laughing at such a dumb joke.

“Why bring one of your knights here?” Diluc asks, taking his coat off, rolling up his sleeves.

“They were exposed to a potion in Albedo’s lab, he suggested bringing them here. He said grape juice might help sober them up, where else would I go to get it when you sell the best.” Kaeya shrugs, making Diluc hum.

“You’re not drinking?” Diluc raises a brow at Kaeya when he realizes there’s no alcohol in front of the captain.

“Nope, I already feel like I’m forgetting something, if I drink I really won’t remember. I’d rather not.” Kaeya sighs, a looking out the window.

“I saw y/n on the way here.” Diluc brings you up, at the sound of your name Kaeya looks at Diluc again his eye brightens. His focus now is on what Diluc has to say.

“My darling? Did you talk to them? What are they doing out this late?” Kaeya smiles, though he’s confused. You’re never out this late.

“They were in the new restaurant down the street, they were drinking.” Diluc clears his throat at the last part.

Kaeya tilts his head. “Alone? What do you mean by drinking?” Kaeya asks

“They had a glass of wine in their hand, they were sitting alone at-

Kaeya tries to think of why you’d be out so late, you don’t have any appointments this late. You didn't tell him you were meeting anyone. His eye catches the calendar behind Diluc and feels his heart drop when he notices the date.

“What time is it?” Kaeya cuts Diluc off.

Diluc pulls out his pocket watch and sighs. “Just hit 10pm” he shows Kaeya and sees the color drain from his face.

“Oh no.” Kaeya stands up in a flash. Before Diluc can question him he’s out the door.

His legs don’t stop. It’s so dark out and you’re alone. How long have you been waiting?

Kaeya sees the restaurant come into view and sprints faster, throwing the door open the instant his hand makes contact with the knob.

The restaurant goes quiet, the few customers and waiters in there stare at the Captain who seems to be out of breath.

He ignores the stares, his eye scanning the vicinity for one person and one person only.

But it's strange, you're not here. He walks further to the back and sees an empty table with a coat that looks familiar.

He sees a waitress clearing empty wine bottles from it, quickly making his way to your coat.

“Excuse me,” Kaeya greets the older waitress and she smiles at him.

“Hell- Captain Kaeya hello! What brings you here?” the waitress smiles.

“I'm looking for someone. Do you know if the person that was sitting here left?” He asks, seeing the waitress’ smile drop a bit.

“Why yes. They were here for a while but they left not too long ago. They had drank a lot of wine and ordered no food. I offered to walk them home since they seemed a bit off balance but they said it was ok. I realized they left their coat a bit too late. I had gone out to tell them but they were already gone.” She explains, feeling sorry for you.

Kaeya feels his chest tighten.

“Thank you. If you don't mind, can I take the coat with me? I'd like to give it to them myself.” Kaeya asks.

“Why of course how sweet of you.” the waitress nods her head, gesturing with her hands for him to take it.

“Thank you.” He quickly thanks the waitress before turning around.

“Wait.” She calls out, making him turn around.

“If I can bother you to check on them right now, I'm worried. If you do stop over there please take this.” she walks past him to the front counter, grabbing a bag.

“I had intended to give this to them since they didn't eat the whole time. They refused, however.” The waitress hands Kaeya the bag of food and he nods.

“Of course, I was planning on stopping by. Thank you for your concern."He thanks her, turning to leave the restaurant. The waitress can see how uneasy Kaeya was from his face, she knows that you were waiting for him all along. When you got up to leave, in your drunken state you told her to tell Kaeya you went home and not to worry.

Kaeya steps out and the cold night air hits him. Did you walk home without your coat? It's freezing. Kayea feels even worse.

His legs walk at such a fast pace, not daring to slow down.

Did you make it home safe? Are you ok? Why did you leave alone?

He starts to run, almost sprint. His mind is racing with the worst.

He turns the corner to your house and stops in his tracks. He sees you. However, you’re not inside the house. You're sitting on the porch leaning on the wall. It's freezing.

His legs move fast again. He drops to his knees when he makes it to you. Grabbing hold of your arms to wake you.

You're freezing to the touch.

“Darling? Hey.” he shakes you a bit and you stir from your sleep, blinking your eyes.

“-ts so cold.” you whisper.

In seconds you feel a coat draping over your shoulders, then a soft fabric around your neck.

Your vision clears and your eyes make out who's in front of you.

Your eyes immediately begin to burn.

“Hey hey, love I’m so sorry please don't cry. I promise I didn’t mean to forget my love, things just happened and it slipped my mind.” He pulls you in when he sees your eyes glossy. His own eyes start to burn.

“Archons, why are you sleeping outside? Do you understand how dangerous that is?” He questions, pulling back a bit seeing you now refusing to look at him.

“I-it was so embarrassing. I sat there while so many people walked in and out. I saw you with someone else and it looked like you were having fun. I was a-alone for hours. I left the restaurant and I left my k-key in the coat of my jacket.” You feel your lip tremble a bit, you’re trying your absolute hardest to not cry but he’s standing right in front of you looking so guilty it hurts.

“That person you saw with me was a subordinate, I wasn’t doing anything else with them while I was out. I was ordered to take them to the tavern to get grape juice to get rid of the effects from a potion they had gotten exposed to. Love, please.” He explains, tone serious as his hands run up and down your shoulders, making you feel warm again.

“It wasn’t my intention.” His whispers, hand coming up under your chin making you look at him.

“Never ever walk home alone again. Not in this state.” He pleads, face full of concern, his eye scanning you making your own eyes burn more.

You notice his white scarf is gone then look down, realizing that’s what he put around you when he found you here.

“I just wanted to s-spend time with you.” You hiccup tears now freely falling down.

He leans in, kissing your cheek, then your other one, up to your forehead, your nose, your chin and stops in front of your lips. You feel his warm breath fan over you and you relax at his simple touch.

“My love, please don’t cry.” His eyes close and he takes a deep breath. He was so worried but you're in front of him, you’re safe with him.

“You have me, I’ll spend as much time as you want until my time is due I promise.” He leans back abit, opening his eye taking you in.

You look tired, you drank and you never do. He put you in this state and it pains him.

“You promise? You promise me i-I’m not thinking the worst, that you still want me and you’ll stay with me?” You ask.

Kaeya doesn’t respond, he leans in, placing a soft kiss on your lips. Hands holding you softly as he gives you another one, and another and another until you're out of breath.

“I swear to the archons above that I want nothing more than to call you mine alway and forever if you’ll allow me.” He pulls back, thumbs wiping any remaining tears that threaten to spill from your eyes.

And they do, more spill out. Having your doubts and feeling insecure gets to you often but Kaeya is so patient, so understanding. Him assuring you, being here right now, apologizing proves he meant no wrong. And you believe him, you trust him. You know he wouldn’t do that now, him being here proves so.

“Darling, let’s get you inside, it's freezing.” He stands, holding his hand out to help you to your feet. Placing his hand on the small of your back when you wobble.

“I’ll explain everything better, in full detail of what happened today once you're inside, once you eat, I promise love.” He assures you still holding onto you, not wanting to let go just yet. You nod, holding his hand abit tighter as he unlocks the door to your shared house, ushering you to walk in first. Seeing him this worried, him running here when he realized he forgot. He found you and immediately checked on you. You have doubts often, but seeing him right here cleared any doubts about today. You will listen to what he has to say and believe him because he’s here that’s all that matters right now. Kaeya is here, he’s yours and you won’t doubt him. Not when he looks at you with such loving eyes and holds you so gently, not when he cares so much. He’s here and that’s all that matters now, but most importantly Kaeya didn’t forget.

_________________

author’s note: hiiii lovelies!!! :D it’s been ages since I’ve posted UGH IVE MISSED WRITING SM! :( I’m sorry for the small hiatus. I wasn’t ok but it’s better now, I notice when I feel the most hurt or pain I write the most it helps me convey what I feel and I love writing, you all giving feedback and enjoying them makes me love writing too! I hope you enjoy, I hope you’re taking care and all in good health MWAHHHH IVE MISSES YOU ALL SO MUCH!^~^<33! (ALSO THIS ISNT EDITED so sorry for any errors!)

the 52-hertz whale

Word count: 8.0k

Warnings: smut, trauma dumping

Summary: love is a choice, you suppose

Hajime Hinata never felt that he was neglected.

He grew up in a family; a family of three, specifically, and he never really felt the financial strain that other kids felt. He had the spare pocket change that most kids his age did, and he had parents. His family was one, perhaps. He doesn't think he has much to complain about when his parents weren't divorced. He had a relatively happy childhood, he thinks.

"Hinata," You fiddle with your fingers. "I know you're not the island's therapist... but I was wondering—"

Hinata welcomes your words that cut off his thoughts. He didn't want to overthink his family again. He has no reason to.

"Go ahead," He smiles. "Would you like to sit in the hospital?"

"Too scary," You pause. "Can we sit in one of our rooms instead?"

"Yours or mine?"

"I don't care," Your voice wavers. "I'm a bit overwhelmed, so maybe a walk instead? I need to sort it out; you can simply listen if you don't want to help."

"Of course," He smiles, following you as you start wandering. Hinata helps around the island with what he can, fixing pipes, lifting materials, even going as far as cooking on the days Teruteru goes a little insane. Hajime Hinata carries the weight of the entire island, so you don't like troubling him with things as simple as your thoughts. Yet, you find yourself staring at him more often, catching the way his brows furrow ever so slightly. He looks tired. Maybe he needed rest as much as you did. Hinata didn't have anyone to lean on without feeling guilty, so you suppose it's expected that the majority of the class acts first instead of him. It's nice to have other people help, even if they aren't aware of how much they are. Hinata takes off his shoes as he steps into the sand. Just yesterday, he was raking out the sharp objects from the sand. "So?"

"I was thinking," You pause. "Of my childhood."

"And?"

"I was a little overwhelmed, I suppose," You mumble. "I really have no reason to complain about it, you see."

Hinata stares at you, and you use a hand to push your hair back as the wind blows in your hair. You still, staring at the setting sun, heart heavy in your chest. Your lips form a pout, and Hinata reaches to ease the crease between your brows. You stare at him, biting your cheek as you do. Maybe this was a mistake. Maybe, you should have just made up an excuse that didn't include trauma dumping on him. Maybe, you should've just—

"It's fine, you know?"

"I was thinking," You frown. "That I miss my best friend."

"Do you?"

"I also miss all the friends I cut off when I entered Hope's Peak," You mumble. "I cut them off because they were toxic for me, but I guess they thought I was stuck up and didn't feel I needed them anymore. They're all dead now, including my parents, yet I don't feel sad about it. Does that make me weird, Hinata?"

He shakes his head. "It depends on how you see it, but I'm sure there's a reason you aren't sad."

"Yes," You continue walking, eyes staring out at sea again. "But you see, I have no reason not to feel sad over the loss of my parents. I grew up with a loving mom and a dad that cheated but never was abusive. My mom made sure that I grew up educated, and my dad never backed out when I spent his card to the point of maxing out. I have no reason to hate them, yet I don't mourn for them at all. There's a bitterness, you see, but not sadness."

Hinata nods.

"But then again," You pause to stare at your stomach showing from the crop top. Reaching down to it, you squeeze the fat sticking out, and you chuckle. "I hated the skin that I sat in because of my mother."

In the distance, a seagull calls, and you step into the water, leaning down to pull the sand dollar out of the grains. Hinata steps next to you, staring at the fossil. Neither of you say a thing, and you grin. "That can go into my next story, granted I don't get sick of writing again."

Hinata turns to stare at you. "Did you hate your talent?"

"Yes," You hum, drying it off on your hip. "I despised the literature I created with my hands. I hated the worlds that were from my mind. I would stare at the documents and throw up all because I had overwritten during a period of time I should have been enjoying my life. I have nothing to complain about to my parents. It was my fault that I decided to go all in to get recruited, not because of them. I suppose I just wanted a way to save their marriage."

Hinata thinks that sounds familiar.

"I made it in," You pause. Hinata waits for the next line, but it never comes. Perhaps he had unconsciously hoped that your tale would play out differently from his. The child in his mind prayed that somehow, your tale would be better than his. Ah, he was having unrealistic thoughts again; Maybe he should have let the analyst talent stay with him; Maybe he hadn't matured that much. That wasn't good news.

In the distance, the wind blows against the trees, the ocean rising to your calf as you stare up at Hinata.

"And?"

"There is no and," You exhale, heart still heavy. "And then they divorced, and I never saw my dad ever again."

"Ah," Hinata mumbles. He presses a hand to your back, almost as if to try to comfort you. He should be better at this. Why isn't he better at this? "Are you..?"

"But that's not what matters," You drag Hinata out of the water. "What matters is that I feel nothing for my parents despite the lack of reason. My mom stayed with me throughout my years at Hope's Peak until the Tragedy. I have no reason to be so desensitized about them. The first person I killed when I became a remnant was my mom. Next was my dad, and then the rest is history." You stare at your hands, biting your bottom lip. "I found the answer."

"It is not the fact that you murdered them." Hinata pauses. "That much I can see."

"Is it not?" You grin at him. The breeze grows colder, and you glance at the palm trees. Five leaves. "I killed my parents with my bare hands, and then I recovered, but I never mourned. Did you see how devastated Teruteru was when he found out he killed his own mother? Sonia was mortified when she realized she destroyed her nation. The same holds for Akane and Nekomaru. I didn't feel anything when my memories were restored. I didn't even feel bad that I had killed my parents. I had been so insensitive when I brought it up that even Komaeda was worried."

Hinata holds his hand up for yours.

You give it to him.

He traces the lines in your palm, and he wonders if he should read them.

"Don't bother," You smile. "I've gotten it read before."

"Mm," He pauses. "Were you lonely?"

"Always," You mumble. "Were you? I remember you were an only child."

"Much more often than I like to admit." Hinata pauses. "What else?"

"Well," You mumble. "I remember my mom cursing about my dad when he wasn't home, and I remember my dad trying to explain to me that I'll understand when I'm older."

Hinata starts leading you back onto the road.

"He tried convincing me in the parking lot of a Home Depot that he had a reason to cheat." You mirror Hinata as he sits down on the bench. "I still don't get it."

"He had a reason, maybe," Hinata lets go of your hand. "But it was not justifiable."

"Yes," You grimace. "And part of growing up for me was the fact that I had to realize he did have a reason to cheat, but not one that could be justifiable. Instead of making a conscious effort to fix it, he just ran away from the problem. A relationship doesn't go a single way, so even when my mom was trying to fix the relationship, without my father cooperating, she was unable to fix it. Love is a choice, Hinata-kun."

Hinata stares at you. "Is that so?"

"I read that somewhere in high school," You brush the dried sand from your feet, pulling the sand dollar out of your pocket. "That is why arranged marriages last longer than willing ones. You can fall out of love for the same reason you can fall in love. The spontaniety of your lover can become recklessness in your eyes, and the smothering devotion they have for you can become suffocating. Love is a choice after you choose that person, perhaps. Is that desensitizing love?"

"No," Hinata slips his shoes on and bends down to brush the sand from your feet for you. "That is not, simply because if it was the case, then you would not see it in the people in love."

You smile as he slips your shoes on for you.

"If love were plainly emotion without choice, you would not see Sonia open her arms whenever she sees Gundham. Peko wouldn't have chosen to die instead of accidentally harm Fuyuhiko a second time. Kamukura wouldn't have chosen to place those flowers on Chiaki's desk. None of those choices would have been conscious if love were just an emotion." Hinata helps you up. "I would not be here listening to you after such a long day."

"I suppose," You grimace. "But you needed this just as much as I did."

He stares at you.

"You waited for me when I said I got in," You laugh dryly. "Did you think making it big would be able to save my parents' marriage? By getting into a fancy private school for the best of the best? If anything, it made it worse. My parents divorced three months into the semester on the day of thanksgiving. It was kind of funny."

"It shouldn't be."

"Yes," You grin. "But unlike your parents, mine split. I didn't feel hurt until I was sitting down and filling out paperwork for something, realizing that I don't have a father. That's when it kind of bites you, making you sit there and rethink your decisions. Then, Hinata, how about you?"

"Ah," Hinata stares at you, pausing. "I don't have much of a childhood to talk about."

"There has to be something," You tilt your head. "or else they would have no reason to sign your life away to a surgery."

"Well," He stares at you, unsure where to start. "It was fine, really, until I started to attend Hope's Peak."

You pat the empty bench. "Sit."

"Thank you," He pauses, face falling. "Then they just sort of... disappeared from my life."

"Is that so?" You lean forward to rest on your palm, staring at the trees ahead.

"They worked hard to be able to pay my tuition for the first year," Hinata chuckles. "And then... they couldn't afford a second year, but I wanted to attend a second year... so."

"You accepted the project," You exhale.

"Yes." He mumbles. "I don't remember much of the treatment other than the neurologist and psychologist. Kamukura's memories are blurry to me."

"Did it hurt?"

"They sedated me," He pauses. "Yeah."

You blink, lips pulled into a frown.

"Now you're frowning again."

"It's dehumanizing," You mumble. "A human made god was violated by its creators."

"My creators did nothing. Kamukura was used by the people he was made for."

"Youwere used by the people you trusted. That makes no difference." You stare at him. "It was still you who was used, and it was Kamukura who chose to sit there. He wasn't a human, unfortunately."

Hinata stares at you.

"But my parents loved me."

"So did mine." You pause. "Just because your parents loved you doesn't mean they couldn't harm you. Maybe their intention wasn't to hurt you, but surely they can still hurt people. A child isn't supposed to accommodate their parents when they are the younger one."

"I suppose, but—"

"There's no need to have a child to save a marriage. That's the weak way out. People who have children to fix their marriages are cowards. They focus all their attention on the child instead of the deteriorating relationship." You pause. "Distracting yourself from your own problems can only last for so long. But then again, human beings are complex, and I'm not Mi-chan, so it doesn't matter."

Hinata stares at you standing up, stepping out to the road, eyes closed. He pauses as you spread your arms out.

In the distance, the sound of the bedtime lullaby plays, and you spin along to Ibuki's music. It's calming, in a way. You're overcome with an unknown nostalgia each time the music plays, and you wonder if it used to be your lullaby. Your parents never sang or read you to sleep. You remember sprawling out on the bed with them, and you remember closing the lights at 12 when you were too tired to continue. You remember the low burn of your mom's desk light as she stayed up studying again, and you remember hating getting out of bed in the morning. You smell the oily sunny-side-up eggs as you stare at the moon, pretending you're still on that trampoline.

You still, realizing you've wandered too far from Hinata. He stands in the middle of the road, staring at you, hand out to reach you.

"Why are you standing there?"

"You look lonely."

"Well, get over here. You're calling and I'm receiving, right? There's no reason for you to be alone."

The moon stares in mild curiosity, wondering if she had seen this before. Perhaps she did. She dreamed of a sun that would touch her, yet she never questioned if the sun were lonely. The sun had no stars as the moon did, so perhaps he was. Well, not that it would worry over something as such. She stares down at the two of you, arms wrapped around each other. The warmth of the sun was enough to heal anyone, even the moon. So she supposed that you were being healed.

Hinata relishes in the coolness of your skin.

"Is that the only reason you called me out?"

"No," You let go of him as he does, and he takes a step back. "My real reason was to screw you over and force you to think over why you got here in the first place."

"I wanted to be an ultimate," He smiles amusedly.

"You? Or the inferiority complex your parents gave you?"

"Now you just sound like Mi-chan."

"That's what she does best," You shrug, starting back toward the rooms. "But she's right, you know? Was it you, or was it your parents? And then also... how can you heal it?"

"I have."

"But you do not process," You stare at the streetlight. "You built that with Souda's help. You water these roads when it gets dry here. You keep the pool together. You do everything around this island, Hinata-kun. You get no time to process things when you're so hyperfocused."

"Maybe."

"Also," You stretch your arms. "There's an unspoken pressure when you grow up alone."

"Maybe for you."

"For me!" You grin. "The unintended thought that my parents only have once chance to succeed plagues my mind daily, even with their death."

Hinata stops in front of your cottage. "Well?"

"Would you like to come in?" You blink up at him.

"Do you—"

"Yes. But it's up to you." You rock on your feet.

Hinata wants to, but the back of his mind tells him to rest.

"I'm going to go back," Hinata smiles.

"No worries!" You beam. "Rest well."

"Of course."

The moon makes way for the sun in the morning, and you blink lifelessly at the sun when you wake up. You feel like shit. Taking a walk at 8pm in the evening and walking in the cold ass ocean was not a smart choice. Maybe a warm shower will fix it? Who knows. You sit in the bath for a good moment, questioning your sanity. You'll stay in today.

It's half past three when Mikan comes in from a call. Hinata had created this weird communication device, and you were tired. Mikan would be quickest, her number being the only single-digit number. She checks your temperature and vitals, sighing when it's nothing more than a fever. It reminds you of when you were younger. You can't recall the last time you broke down with a fever. You thought you were taking care of yourself well.

"Um," Mikan helps you sit up, handing you the pills with water. "I also have liquid if you want..."

"It's fine," You mumble, taking the pills from her hand. They feel scratchy against your throat, and you cough once the water washes them down. "I just need to sleep it off, right?"

"Yes," She mumbles. "I'm so sorry!"

"No," You stare up. "That's on me for catching a fever again. Thank you."

"O-of course," She keeps the door unlocked as she leaves, and you fall back asleep. You're uncomfortable. Your whole body is freezing, yet you have two blankets on top of you. At times like this, you can't help but miss your mom. At least she had everything on hand and could tell when you were about to get sick. You don't remember the last time she had panicked over you, but you always remember the soup she made. Ugh, now you want some.

Sometime before the sun sets completely, the door opens again. You whimper at the breeze and pull the covers over you. The person walks around the room, opening the window, taking the finished soup from the bedside drawer, and turning on the water. You stay in a zone between consciousness and unconsciousness, and you whimper as they finally pull the covers off.

"Come on," You wrap your arms around their neck as you're lifted off the bed.

"I'm going to get you sick..."

"Doesn't matter."

"Wait," You squint at the figure and pause at the sight of Hinata. "I can bathe myself."

"I'm not going to violate you, if that's what you wanted to ask. I need to cool your skin down, and we don't have enough alcohol to wipe you down."

"My mom used to do that," You slur as he sits you in the tub. "She used to wipe be own with alcohol pads when I got sick."

Hinata turns the showerhead on, and you droop as he has the water run down your back.

Your eyes flutter from the warmth, and Hinata catches your head before you pass out.

"Sorry."

"I'll wash you, so don't worry about it."

You don't know how long you sit in the tub, but when your eyes open again, Hinata's sitting next to your bed, screwing at another piece of machinery. You turn your head to stare at him.

"Stop doing that."

"No."

"Stop tinkering with the old DS." You mumble. "You're not going to be able to load Chiaki on that."

"It's not to load her."

"It won't connect to internet."

"It will."

"You're like a child," You shift to stare back up at the ceiling.

"In a way, aren't you the same?"

"Yeah," You mumble. "The world hates children."

"Only those who don't understand the value." Hinata places the screwdriver down. "Chiaki was the one who called for Mikan."

"Thank you," You mumble into the air to no one in particular.

Your eyes flutter shut again.

When you wake up next, Hinata is eating dinner.

"I have your soup," He sets his bowl down on the drawer and helps you sit up.

"I'm not weak to that point." You mumble, but you don't fight him.

"I know," Hinata grabs your bowl, blowing on the spoon to cool the soup. "But it's what you need."

"What I want," You open your mouth and swallow as Hinata helps you drink. "Not what I need."

"What you need." Hinata mumbles. "Just like you had sat in my room until I woke up after the incidents."

"Which one?" You laugh dryly. "The one when the big TV fell on your head? The one where you almost cracked your head open and scared the shit out of everyone? The one where—"

"All of them," Hinata presses the spoon to your lips again. "Every single one of them, you took care of me like this."

"I know," You swallow. "Let me drink it myself."

"I'll hold the bowl," Hinata hands you the spoon, and you drink. Hinata's eyes stay fixated on your throat as you swallow. You're embarrassed. You're an adult now, for life's sake. You're supposed to take care of yourself when you're sick, not have someone else take care of you.

"What are we?"

Hinata stares at you.

"Unlabeled."

"Well no shit," You choke on the last syllable, and Hinata pats your back. "I'm asking for a reason."

"I don't know what we are," He stares at you. "You didn't give me a label either."

"Well," You pause. "vent buddies? No. We're not that. You're nothing like my other friend. I didn't want to fuck that friend."

"You want tofuckme?"

"Huh, I guess I've never told you," You stare into his soul. "Some days I think of you folding me in half over a restaurant table."

Hinata sputters at your straightforwardness as you lie back down in the bed.

"So what are we?"

"Mutual pining. That's the term, right?"

"You think about fucking me?"

"No." Hinata pauses. "Well, yes, but not the same way you do—"

"You want to get pegged?"

"Can you let me finish?" Hinata sighs. You bat your lashes at him, and he presses a hand to your forehead to check your temperature. "I don't, but there's a reason I'm always the one taking care of things in your room when it could be Souda fixing it."

"Ah," You stare at him, eyes wide. "You like me too."

"Sure." Hinata mumbles. "Now, go back to sleep. Your fever is reducing."

"That's good," You smile. "Does that mean we're dating?"

You don't hear Hinata's answer when you drift off.

Hinata stares at your resting form, and he glances at the clock on the wall. He could stay up the entire night, but you'd probably scold him for that. Well, not that it mattered. You'd be good to go in the morning. He has to go back to fixing the broken speaker in Komaeda's room that he left alone to sit with you. You seem drunk when sick. He finds that cute, he supposes.

The night passes as Hinata falls asleep in the chair, and you wake up to the male's head slipping. You slide a pillow between his neck and head and toss a blanket over him, heading off to shower. You feel better. You still feel like shit, but better. You'd have to thank him later. Hinata worked tirelessly around the island. He at least deserved someone who could take care of him.

You wonder, though, if he just wasn't hearing the call.

When you step out, Hinata's awake, staring at you owlishly.

"You know, it's a miracle you can control how aroused you get," You brush past him to change into actual clothes. Hinata takes the towel from you as he glances at your bare skin.

"I can't," He exhales. "I'm about to shower after you."

You cough, embarrassed. "You're gonna shower without me?"

"We can shower together next time," He ruffles your hair as he steps into the bathroom.

The sun's in the sky when you step out of the hut with Hinata. You stare up, holding a hand up to block the sun.

"A tropical storm is approaching in four days."

"You can smell it?"

Hinata pauses. "Well, kind of. It's also just from the storm patterns in the area."

"When's our next batch of supplies coming in?"

"This week," Hinata checks his phone, and you pause.

"We are..."

"We're dating," Hinata smiles. "We're dating now."

"Okay!" You yell, throwing fists into the air. "We're dating!"

"We're dating." Hinata imitates your fists.

You beam at him. "We're dating."

There's something strange about living with others. You don't remember the last time it felt like you lived with someone other than yourself, and you struggle to remember there are two people in the hut now. You stare at Hinata each morning, your stomach churning at the sight of him all vulnerable next to you. You could kill him if you wanted to. You could press a blade to his neck and wreak havoc on the island like a proper writer. You could learn so much just from a single person.

But your stomach churns for another reason.

You don't deserve Hinata.

You sit in bed each morning, staring at Hinata, counting the freckles on his face as the sun rises from the east, heart heavy, wondering when Hinata's going to realize you're a bad person. You sit there counting the acne on his back, counting the number of times you've messed up around him. You love Hinata like the moon loves the sun, but you could never have him for yourself. It feels heartbreaking to know that you didn't deserve someone like him. You were nothing compared to the ultimate hope. You wrote stories for a living, overthinking like it was your job. You think of every possibility, never leaving one behind. The only difference was you wrote them into stories.

"Good morning." You smile as Hinata smiles at you.

"Good morning." He presses a kiss to your hand. "Ready to start the day?"

"Yeah."

It cycles, you think. You wake up earlier than Hinata, stare out the window, cycle through those vicious thoughts, and then forget about everything when Hinata presses a morning kiss to your skin. Some days, you lie awake in bed, heart heavy with melancholy. You miss your friends. You miss the people who did everything in their power to make sure you were alright and safe. Maybe you shouldn't have cut them off when you needed to work on yourself.

"You're thinking again," Hinata hands you a coffee from the vending machine. "What's up?"

"Coffee at 9?"

"It's hot chocolate."

"I hope it tastes like the ones from Starbucks," You mumble, pressing the metal to your lips.

"You're thinking again." Hinata sits next to you on the bench.

"Missing my old friends," You open your mouth, only closing it when you realize you don't have the right words. "I miss a handful of them."

"I'm sure you do." Hinata smiles. "That's normal."

"Maybe," You pause. "But I don't miss any of them. I miss every single toxic friend in my life that I've ever made. I miss the people that cut me out too."

"Did you do something wrong?"

"Plenty of things," You laugh bitterly. "So many things."

Hinata stares at you. "Did you ever apologize?"

"No." You exhale, sinking into the bench. "I never had the humility to do it."

Hinata opens his mouth to speak. "Well—"

"Aren't I such a bad person?" You smile at him. "I bullied people as a child, never apologized to them, killed my parents, and cut so many innocent people out of my life. I left my friends, tricked everyone into thinking I'm a good person, and now I even tricked you into dating me. I truly am incredible. I'm such... a bad... person..."

Hinata takes your hand into his, drawing gentle circles. "Do you think I'm unable to tell good from bad?"

"No," You grimace. "I just... not worth it."

Hinata draws little shapes on your palm, smiling affectionately at your hand as he does. "I once read that love is a choice."

He's using your words against you.

"You choose the people you stay with, even if it isn't in a romantic relationship." Hinata taps your palm twice. "That is what love is. Choices."

Behind you, the waves crash against the rocks, and Hinata continues.

"It was a choice to love you, and it was a choice to stay with you even after hearing everything you've told me. I am in love with you as much as someone can be in love with someone." Hinata presses your fingers to his lips. "You like this, right?"

Your eyes are still distant.

"Do I have to fuck you to convince you that you're worthy?"

You shake your head. "There's no need for that. You couldn't possibly think of—"

Hinata bites your fingers with his canines, staring you in the eye as he does.

"That's weirdly out of character."

"Aaaand there goes the tension." Hinata takes your fingers out, laughing along with you.

"You don't need to fuck me," You stand up, stretching your arms. "for me to feel loved."

"You want it, though."

"Sure." You stare at the speakers. "Maybe another day."

"Maybe during the storm?"

"Yeah," You turn to stare at him. "Definitely during the storm. By that time, I'll be able to scream all I want!! I'll get to cry abt howgoodyour dick is, and how you're the only one who can split me in—"

"That's enough," Hinata covers your mouth with his hand, ears burning. "I'll keep that in mind when you actually get fucked."

"Hoaw bigh arhe you," You speak against his palm, and he stares at you.

"You'll find out eventually."

Hinata walks you home, slowly, maybe. The two of you share a home now. Your home is as much of a home to him as it's a home to you. You still wonder if you tricked him into falling for you. You're not someone particularly special, still. Your talent is useless on this island, even if you knew a million things in theory. What use are you if you like putting things off? God, it's just like when your mom made you retake your exams so you'd get a better score, but you only ended up scoring the same.

"Talk it out."

"It's just a fleeting thought." You pause in place. "It doesn't matter anymore."

"I still want to hear it," Hinata pauses with you.

"I was thinking about. I was thinking about my last year at Hope's Peak."

"Mhm?"

"And how my inner child was never satisfied." You pause. "Even though she was spoiled with whatever she wanted. She lacked love."

"Did she?"

"So she was stuck staring at herself in the mirror, asking if she was the problem. She's not, I don't think so, but I understand why she would think that." You pause. "I was lazy for refusing to take the AP tests that would send me to the United States during college. I don't regret it, but I suppose I would've liked an apology from my mom."

Hinata frowns when you exhale.

"But the past is the past, and they aren't things worth mulling over."

"But they are things that you need to process."

"The only thing I can figure out right now is that I'm almosthappymy mom died."

Hinata chuckles. "That's not good."

"definitely! but I... my mom never really felt like my mom after I moved the first time. You watch your family fall apart, and you wonder if maybe you were the reason."

"Yeah," He pauses. "I wondered that too. But that's not the case."

"Definitely!" You clasp your hands together. "But that's only myfamilytrauma. I have plenty of tangled emotions when it comes to friends as well."

"Wanna talk?"

"I want sleep." You start back up, pulling Hinata along. "You better fuck me until I'm braindead when the storm hits."

"Why so?"

"So I can forget about my first love instead of processing it."

Hinata chuckles as you pull him along. "Will do."

When the sun sets to make way for the moon, your mind goes back to the past, wandering, thinking, praying, crying for some way to be able to change something. You wanted to cut people out earlier. You wanted to kill yourself. You wanted to do so many things, yet you never did a single one. Maybe everything could have been avoided if you had just stabbed yourself in the neck like you wanted to.

On other days, you brace yourself for when Hinata's going to break up with you. It should be exhausting to date you, you think.

When the storm hits, you ignore all warnings and step out into the rain, soaking from head to toe. You stare at the clouds above, heart strangely calm. Hinata would beat you if he were with you, you think. Well, maybe not beat. He'd definitely be worried. You're tired of a lot of things. You miss no one and nothing, and you no longer have a purpose in life. Maybe your next goal would be to get married and settle down, but you couldn't possibly fathom getting married. It was another thing, perhaps.

"There you are," Hinata holds the umbrella over the two of you, and you stare at him.

"I'd like to stay in the rain."

"I'll stay with you, then," He stands to the side as you run down the cement, and he follows behind as you throw your shoes off to feel the sand between your toes. He holds them in his free hand as you spin and sprint through the sand. It feels strange to him, but you have your reasons. You're soaked from head to toe, laughter louder than anything he's heard before, and he wonders if this was just another part of you.

"It's like washing away all your worries."

"The rain?"

"Yes."

Hinata stares at you fondly under the slams of the water from the sky, and he wonders if this could wash you off incredibly quickly. Maybe you'd feel better after the rain. Well, the two of you would have to shower. The rain was cleaner, sure, but it still wasn't clean. The acid spills from the tragedy are still hard to clean up, and sure, the earth is damaged beyond repair, but it's liveable. Hinata's seen more than enough plants sprout to know that earth is still inhabitable. But that was just humankind, he supposes: finding a way to live even on the brink of destruction.

You lie down in the sand, and Hinata steps close to you, staring down at you.

"Feel better?"

"Yes," You smile.

"Let's get back before the storm gets even worse."

"Will it?"

"Yes," Hinata holds the umbrella over your head, handing you the shoes. "We need to be inside at that point. I scheduled an announcement."

"Alright," You stand up, slipping your feet into the sandals, "Can we fuck?"

"After you shower."

"Can we fuck in the shower?"

Hinata sighs, dragging you along. "Let's warm you up first before you think about fucking."

"Alright," You hold onto his upper arm as he holds the umbrella, and the two of you go home.

☾﹠☽

"I wonder how you don't get hard," You close your eyes as Hinata's nails dig into your scalp to clean. "Do you not think I'm hot?"

"If you had to sit through how many times I get hard from you in a day, I think you'd think differently." Hinata feels the showerhead for temperature before he runs the water down your head.

"Really?"

"Yeah," He holds a hand to avert the bubbles from your eyes. "Right?"

You jolt as Hinata presses your back to his chest, and your eyes widen at the feeling.

"You're hard!"

"Yeah," He hums, changing the showerhead setting. Once the bubbles are out of the way, he holds you close to him by the thigh, pressing the showerhead at your clit, causing you to squeak.

"A-ah," You sputter. "What's— huh? It feels—"

Hinata chuckles lowly next to your ear, your legs twitching from the pressure. You wonder if Hinata is doing this to get back at you.

"You," You gasp. "Asshole!"

"You wanted this."

Your nails dig into his wrist as he leans closer, hooking an arm under your knee to hold you up as your legs give out. His other hand holds the showerhead to your clit, forcing the water pressure to hit you. The coil in your stomach tightens as your head is thrown back onto Hinata's shoulder as you feel something coming. Your voice wavers as he bites into your collar, and your nails leave marks as your orgasm crashes down on you.

Hinata lowers the pressure of the water, and he presses a gentle kiss to the bite mark before putting the showerhead back up. You lean against his frame, and he lowers your leg slowly.

"I hate you," You whimper, legs shaking.

"Stay still. I still need to condition your hair."

You reach behind you to smack him as he does, and Hinata purses his lips in amusement once you retract your hand.

"Close your mouth," He hums. "You're going to get the conditioner in your hair."

"You're as hard as a rock!"

"Which part?" You can hear the smirk in his voice.

"Your chest," You rub your knuckles as Hinata finishes with your hair. "I keep forgetting you're built like a boulder."

Hinata chuckles.

"Sit down," You turn around, forcing Hinata to his knees.

"Gonna sit on me?" You stare at him, forcing him on his ass, straddling him.

"Maybe later." You reach for the shampoo, nails digging into Hinata's scalp. "Is it too rough?"

"No." Hinata's eyes are closed as you continue. "You know, I miss life before Hope's Peak sometimes."

"Mhm," You hum, reaching for the showerhead.

"My middle school years were nice. My parents got along back then." He tilts his head back as you press the showerhead to his hair. "Though, I still felt like I wasn't enough since my parents were both ultimates."

"What were they?"

"A ballroom dancer..." Hinata opens his eyes to look at you. "and a theologist."

"Awful pairing," You pause. "Though I can see how they would work."

"They didn't work. They were both hot after surgery, and then they gave birth to me."

"You're hot, though?"

"Maybe to you." Hinata chuckles, wrapping his arms around your waist. "But remember, I was just some guy before I was operated on."

"Still hot, though," You mumble, squirming as Hinata rests his hands on your waist. "It's not like they changed your bone structure or your face. Unless they did, and I didn't know."

"If they did that then they'd have to rewrite all the plans," Hinata reaches behind him to turn the water on.

You kneel up, hand reaching for his cock, pressing the tip to your pussy.

"You want to go raw?"

"They sent us plan b this time around," You blink at him for confirmation.

"Not yet," Hinata moves you onto your back, closing the water behind him. He runs his thumb down your labia, sliding a finger in slowly. Your breath hitches as he does, and Hinata presses a gentle kiss to your clit. You shudder at the feeling, and Hinata glances at you. "This is alright, right?"

"Yeah," You mumble. "Embarassed, but fine."

"Good," Hinata slides a second finger in, pressing on your walls. You squirm and pulse around him, and Hinata spreads your labia with his fingers, pressing his tongue plat against you. His fingers curl inside you as you pull on his hair, and he finds a pattern that gets you arching your back. Your mind hazes as he does, and you whimper, mouth open. Your heel digs into his back as you cum, and Hinata pulls his fingers out slowly, staring at the way your cum connects his fingers to you. His dick twitches at the sight. "How lewd."

You smack him playfully, face warm with embarrassment.

"Now," Hinata mumbles. "You should be wet enough."

He sits back as he pulls you to him. You get on your knees again, and you sink down slowly. Hinata presses his fingers into your waist, biting his bottom lip as you lower yourself. You choke once you take all of him in."Ah, fuck, you're big.Gimme a minute,ahto adjust, please."

Hinata rubs gentle circles on your waist as you squirm. He's thick.

You're glad he got you wet beforehand, but you wonder if you'd actually get split in half from his cock. You pulse around Hinata from the thought. "Mhm." You exhale finally. "You're big."

"Am I?"

"Very," You wrap your arms around his neck. "You're really hot too."

"Well," Hinata reaches behind him to turn off the water, and you squeal as he lifts you. Your legs wrap around his waist instinctually, and he sighs. "If you really say so." He adjusts your arms over his shoulders and holds a hand under your ass to support you.

"Are we going to bed?"

"I'm going to fuck you stupid," He leans in next to your ear. "And you're going to be screaming louder than the storm outside, and everyone's going to hear how much of a whore you are for me." You clench around him, and Hinata hums. "You like it."

"Mhm," You're practically drooling at this point. His eyes follows yours to where the two of you are connected, and a smirk graces his face.

"What do you want me to do, sweetheart?"

You stare up at him, eyes wide. "You can't be serious."

"Hm?"

"Hinata, please."

He stares down at you. "Nothing? I can pull out right no—"

"No!" You tighten your arms around his shoulder. "I want... I want you to fuck me."

"Come on, use your words."

"I want you to fuck me stupid," You stare at him, desperate. "Rail me so good and pump me so full that the plan b won't even work. Please, please,please."

"There you go," He smiles. "Good job, precious."

You gasp as he pulls out and thrusts back in, and you shake as he finally places you in bed.

His thumbs dig into your hips as he holds your legs over his shoulders, folding you into the bed. You gasp as he forces himself deeper into you, and you grab at the sheets, knuckles turning white as he starts thrusting. Your lips part, words turning into incomprehensible noises. His cock's making it hard to think. Your mind blurs as you lay there, and your gasps turn sharp as you feel your stomach tightening again. There's no way he was making you cum this fast.

"S-slow down," You gasp, nails digging into the sheets. "'s, 's too much!"

"You can take it, right? I know you can, sweetheart." Hinata mumbles into your ear, and he hisses as you cum around him. He presses a kiss to your jaw, mumbling sweetly into your ear, "You're so good for me, right? Look at you, listening so well for me. I think you deserve a little reward, hm?"

You move your arms to warp around his neck, and Hinata smiles.

"You're so pretty," You mumble, whimpering as Hinata slides out slightly.

"Am I?"

"Gorgeous," You gasp as Hinata bounces you on his cock again, and you grimace from how sensitive you are. Your mind blanks, and you barely register what you're saying, even if Hinata understood. "Pretty, so pretty... you're so dazzling... hic, Hajime! hot... perfect! I,mm, don't think I could,hah, live with—out you!"

Hinata chuckles, smiling gently.

"Is that so?"

"MhM!" Your head digs into the crook of his neck, and you bite. "My pretty Haji."

Hinata hisses from the feeling of your teeth, and his thrusting grows erratic as he gets closer. "You're pretty too, precious. You're so good for me, you know? You're always there in the morning when I wake up, and you're always waiting for me to open up. God, you're gorgeous, you know?"

You whine as you clench around him harder.

"Only you, darling." Hinata digs his fingers into your waist as you cum, sending Hinata over the edge as well. His hips dig into yours, and he bites into your neck, you whimper into his neck, and Hinata sets you into the bed gently, almost as if handling a newborn.

Your eyes droop as Hinata leaves to grab the towel to wipe you down.

"Do you have energy to shower?"

"After four orgasms?" You stare at him.

"I'll carry you back. You're going to feel disgusting in the morning."

"Alright," You yawn, leaning on Hinata as he hooks his arms under your back and knees. "Can I suck your tits next time?"

Hinata chokes. "Really?"

"Really." You mumble. "Sorry for making you shower twice."

"Don't be," He smiles. "I wouldn't have gone along if I didn't want to."

"Mmk," You close your eyes. "You know, Hinata, I think I know what you are now."

"You didn't know what I was?"

"You're average," You grin, reaching up at him once he sets you in the water. "You're the most painfully average guy I know."

"Still?"

"No, you're average in the perfect way. In the end, perfect still suffers, so I suppose you're just as average as some superhuman can get," You lean on his chest as he rubs the bubbles down your back. "I wonder how we're dating."

"Because you're beautifully average in your own way," Hinata hums, the vibrations traveling down your skin. "You're just any other student on this island, and your background is what sent you here with the rest of us, right?"

"I suppose," You smile.

A silence covers the two of you as Hinata finishes washing you, and you sit back as you watch him scrub himself. You feel safe in this small hut. You missed the feeling of warmth spreading through your chest. Hinata was your home now. Just as he had chosen to stay when you were sick, you had chosen to stay with him. Hajime Hinata loved you vivaciously. His hands were warm on your skin, and his hands were warm holding onto yours. Hajime Hinata was the embodiment of the sun as you had adored him to pieces as the moon. Maybe he had heard you call. Perhaps the way he stood in front of you was proof of it.

You stretch your arms out as Hinata helps you into a robe, and you yawn. "Hinata, have you ever seen a whale?"

"In person?" He helps you close the robe.

"Yea." You hum.

"No," Hinata ties the belt around your waist and ties his own. "Do you want me to carry you?"

"No," You follow him as he leaves the bathroom, and he helps you into the bed. Pulling the covers over you, he pulls the string to turn the master light off. Sliding into bed next to you, he closes the lamp. You stare at the way his pecs peek from behind his robe. Next time.

"You know," You blink, realizing your exhaustion. "I once read about a whale who kept calling but never got an answer."

Hinata rolls on his side, tracing mindless circles on your skin. "The 52 hertz whale?"

"Yea," You hum. "It got a friend recently according to marine biologists."

"Really?"

"Another whale called back," You smile, rolling onto your side to smile at Hinata.

Hinata wraps his arms around you, eyes closing as he breathes in your skin. You're cool against his skin, and he welcomes the feeling.

"Thank you for responding," You mumble, eyes closing.

"Thank you for calling." He smiles, pressing a gentle kiss to the corner of your eye. "Good night, love. I'll see you in the morning."

"Sweet dreams, pretty boy." You lean into his chest. "Love you."

"Love you too."

and his voice is a familiar sound | scaramouche

forced proximity + childhood friends reuniting, humor, kissing and tension. suggestive implications and suggestive humor, a bit of scara’s mommy issues, wc 5k

ft. a down bad jealous bf scaramouche, bffs heizou and kazuha, and aether bc aether always has to be there

“If I ask you to come with us for a vacation, would you say yes?”

Your bedroom was already too cramped for one person, with what you could afford with your money after quitting your part-time job. It made it incredibly difficult for all parties involved when you invited someone over, especially when that person had no concept of personal space. You barely looked up from the pages of your book, humming halfheartedly to whatever Heizou is saying. You heard vacation and instantly decided to not waste your time.

Heizou must have sensed these thoughts, too, because he forces himself into your field of view by nearly climbing over your lap. “Hey, look at me. Would you say yes?”

“Heizou!” you hissed, pushing him off before Heizou could wrinkle the pages of the book that’s definitely overdue for borrowing time. You started to think about taking another part-time job if your friends kept inviting themselves over and invading your personal space.

Heizou looked at you, his face doing a complicated combination of a frown and a smug grin. “Come on. You never join us on trips…”

“For good reason,” you said, gesturing to the lapful of Heizou you are currently getting bombarded with.

“You’re so mean,” Heizou laughed, thankfully getting off your lap. He refused to let go of you, however, immediately wrapping an arm over your shoulder and pressing up against your side. This must be one of his techniques to make the people he was questioning feel restricted. It was working. “How will you get yourself to settle for a nice, young man with that attitude? What are you even reading?”

“I grabbed whatever book had a pleasing cover so I can tune your nonsense out.” It wasn’t exactly a lie.

“What?” Heizou clapped the book shut and turned to you with the eyes of a reprimanding mother. “I swear I’m being serious. Can’t you consider it for even a minute? You’re breaking my heart. Plus, Kazuha’s the one who’s inviting us out.”

Hmm. What a compelling argument. Heizou knew that no one could ever say no to Kazuha. You wouldn’t really care if your absence would break Heizou’s heart, but Kazuha’s disappointed eyes were enough to put a god to their knees.

You zeroed in on Heizou’s wording. “Who’s ‘us’?”

Heizou started listing each with a raise of a finger. “Just Kazuha and Aether—and a friend we met recently. Kazuha invited him.”

You frowned. You didn’t know Aether visited again. “How the hell did Aether get invited?” Then, upon careful reflection: “And who’s the new friend?”

“If he was around, why not, right?” Heizou laughed, carefully setting the overdue book aside from your view. “The new friend’s Scaramouche. Have you met him before?”

What a strange name. Kazuha always managed to befriend people from all over, like a child bringing home turtles and a new species of bugs. You made a note to look him up. “Never heard of him.”

He hummed. “Said he came from Sumeru but he looked pretty Inazuman to me. Funny guy. He’s like a disgruntled baby brother.”

“And you only met him, what, recently? Why is he invited to our group already?” you asked, like the territorial person you are. How come it seemed like you were the last to know about this guy?

Aether was alright. Aether came back every few months to check up on everyone and got roped into all kinds of things with your friends, so you knew him well enough already. You liked his long braid. Heizou and Kazuha had been your friends for as long as you could remember being a college student.

Heizou grinned, patting your head. “Scaramouche’s nice, I promise. You wouldn’t even notice he’s there.”

At your dubious stare, Heizou amended, “C’mon, do you think I’m the type to befriend an asshole?”

Yes, but Heizou wasn’t the type to befriend a major asshole whose opinions he vehemently disagreed with, and he thought belonged better in jail, so you had to think about it for a bit. At the very least, this new guy didn’t seem like a criminal.

Your friends loved traveling, with Kazuha mostly being the culprit, but you liked staying inside most of the time. They never forced you to go with them, so why was Heizou being suspiciously persistent today?

“I think he’s your type,” Heizou finally said, caving in.

“You’re trying to hook me up with him?”

“Not exactly… but you two would seem cute.” He went silent for a thoughtful moment. “I mean, I wouldn’t be opposed if you slept together.”

You made a face.

Heizou laughed brightly. “Alright, alright. You can go back to being the good poster student you are if you promise to think about it. Seriously. Kazuha’s moving to Liyue soon—he’s probably inviting us out because of that.”

“I’ll think about it,” you said, reaching around for your book.

You would. What Heizou said about Kazuha made you remember that there are only a few weeks left until this is all over—then, after that, you all might go your separate ways. That thought floated around your mind for a little while as Heizou made himself comfortable on your bed, sighing before he dozed off.

You sighed, shuffling to give him space. “If this is your way of trying to make me get laid, try to at least be subtle and not weird me out before I even meet the guy.”

You stalked Kazuha’s Insta to search up this Scaramouche guy and nearly dropped your phone.

scaramouche11206. It was empty, entirely useless for your research. Scaramouche’s profile was a public account, had zero posts, and had four people he was following. It was Kazuha, Aether, Heizou, and a Vahumana Darshan update page.

You checked the tagged posts, and your jaw dropped to the ground.

Scaramouche was Kunikuzushi.

Heizou was taking a group selfie in the image, his tongue stuck out and winking while the camera showed two other men. On the left was Kazuha, with his ever-polite smile, then on the other, with the all-black getup was what the tags said was scaramouche11206.

It was a little difficult to tell why you were enamoured with the masked face with a short hime cut for a moment, but the piercing stare to the camera couldn’t be mistaken. It was a minute of staring before it clicked. This was your Kunikuzushi.

You dialed Heizou before you could even think about it.

“What…? It’s five a.m.” He sounded like he just woke up, “What’s up?”

You swiped back to the image of Scaramouche, as if staring at it any longer would imprint each pixel to your brain and bring him to life before you. “Hey, where’s Kazuha? Tell him I’m going.”

YEARS AGO.

Summer. The cicadas rang in your ears. They chirped about as you and Kunikuzushi trudged further into the forest. Sunlight peeked through the leaves, splashing Kunikuzushi’s beautiful face in a delicate glow.

Komorebi. Shadows scattered on the ground. Kunikuzushi lifted his head and turned to you. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

His voice was quiet, but even with the wind and the singing cicadas, you could hear him loud and clear. You could pick out his voice from a crowd. Your heart would know where to find him.

“I like looking at you,” you said. “I like you.”

He accepted the answer and continued walking. You beamed. Usually, Kunikuzushi would scoff and bat your words away, hiding his flustered face. But he didn’t.

Longing. Kunikuzushi turned back to you, stopping in his steps. You nearly bumped onto his back. “Do you like me enough to marry me?”

Was this a marriage proposal? You tried to think of you and Kunikuzushi, walking down aisles and reciting vows, and almost laughed. But then you tried to think of anyone else. You tried to think of a life without Kunikuzushi.

You thought of Kunikuzushi with anyone else and nearly threw up in his face. “You’re the only one for me.”

“Even if I hurt you?”

You frowned. “You would never hurt me, Kuni.”

Kunikuzushi’s expression crumpled. He could never hide anything from you; he was too expressive, eyes round and lip trembling. Your heart sunk to your stomach. You reached for his hands and forced him to look at you. “Kuni, what’s wrong? Did something happen?”

He looked at the ground. “I said I didn’t want to live with her anymore. I didn’t really think Mom would make Aunt Nahida take me.”

The cicadas faded. The world fell into a hush. Your grip on his hands grew weak. “What?”

Kunikuzushi didn’t have a good relationship with his mother; you knew that. They were complicated. They always fought and he grew up to loathe her. You knew that. But you didn’t think…

You breathed in deeply. It was not Kunikuzushi’s fault. It was not Ei’s—and definitely not Nahida’s fault. It was just the way things go sometimes.

You forced a laugh, hoping to ease the troubled expression on his face. “Were you proposing because you’re moving away?”

Kunikuzushi blushed. “Shut up.”

Your face softened. He was always so cute when his face was as red as the red by his eyes.

Kunikuzushi inhaled sharply, taking your hands and looking at you with a determined glint in his eyes. “If I were going to ask you out, I would do it better than anyone who would try to marry you. So don’t entertain them.”

The trip’s plan was basically swimming when you could, staying at a hotel, driving out of the hotel to eat somewhere cheaper, and it would be stretched out for a few days. All in all, it didn’t sound too bad. With the type of people you were going out with, you were expecting a lot more drinking (Kazuha) and near-death-related activities (Aether). Although Heizou said it was Kazuha’s trip, he was apparently mistaken.

“It was originally for Scaramouche and his family, but his mother had last-minute changes and couldn’t go,” Kazuha explained as he helped you fit your luggage in the trunk of Aether’s car. “Scaramouche said it would be a waste and told me to invite my friends.”

“Woo-hoo, Scaramouche’s mom!” Heizou cheered.

“When we met her, it seemed like you hated her,” Kazuha mused as Heizou climbed inside the car. You were in the passenger seat while the two were shoved in the back. It seemed that even if you moved to a bigger apartment, you’d end up suffocated by Inazuman men either way.

“Hard not to after hearing Scara’s contempt for her. I’m an empath or something.” 

Aether adjusted the side mirrors. “Are we forgetting anything?”

“Where’s the Scaramouche guy?” you asked.

Heizou cast you a sly smile. “He’s already at the hotel, probably buying us other rooms.”

At least another thing about him hadn’t changed: he’s still disgustingly rich. You did some digging about the hotel, and it was the kind of place you could only dream of even looking at. You suddenly felt severely underdressed for a five-star hotel, with only sweatpants, a duffle bag, and a dream.

“Hmm, I don’t think so,” Kazuha said, and weirdly enough, you caught him looking at you curiously from the sideview mirror.

“No?” Heizou crossed his arms behind his head. “I doubt Scaramouche’s the type to willingly share a room with anyone.”

Aether scoffed, laughing under his breath. “Definitely not with us.”

You looked outside to hide a smile. It seemed that your Kunikuzushi hadn’t really changed drastically. This made you feel better about meeting him again.

“What made you change your mind?” Heizou asked.

You sighed and fell into step along with him as Kazuha and Aether went on ahead. There are families crowding the lobby, draped in gold that matched the fabric of the chandeliers overhead. Their jewelry was brighter than your future. Even the floor smelled expensive.

“Scaramouche did,” you mumbled.

Heizou’s brows lifted to his hairline. “Oh?”

“I mean—I don’t know, I’m not sure yet.” You were absolutely sure, but it’d be embarrassing if he didn’t recognize you at all, and Heizou would think you were just lying. It had been years.

Heizou tilted his head. “Well, whatever it is, I’m rooting for you. And if he fucks up, I know how to pack a punch.”

You didn’t doubt it. Heizou definitely knew how to pack a punch.

The hotel was so fancy and so meant for only rich kids that you and Heizou stood out like sore thumbs by looking around. Some woman your age walked past, her chin high and her steps light. You and Heizou looked at each other, then tried to mimic the same grace as you pair sashayed towards the desk.

“What are you idiots doing?” Aether asked as you reached them.

“Fitting in, unlike you,” Heizou said.

A new voice cut in. “Took you losers long enough.”

Scaramouche turned around after speaking to the clerk, his mouth in a thin line and his stare piercing. He also stood out next to the men in polo with his fingerless gloves and gold rings. He looked like he belonged better on an Inazuman fashion magazine cover than on a hotel vacation with a bunch of losers.

Heizou beamed. “Scara!”

“Hey,” Scaramouche said, then his eyes landed on you.

It was hard to tell if there was any reaction on his face because Heizou went up to him to ruffle his hair, stealing away his attention.

“Thanks for inviting us out. I didn’t know you were the type to want to snuggle with his friends.” Heizou waggled his eyebrows as Scaramouche pushed him away with a hand to Heizou’s face.

Scaramouche wrinkled his nose. “I am not sharing a room with any of you three. You snore, Kazuha snores louder, and I would wake up to Aether’s leg on my stomach the next morning.”

“That was one time,” Aether muttered, blushing.

“How many rooms are reserved?” Kazuha asked.

Scaramouche sighed, craning his neck. He had a really nice side profile. “Still two. The other one with a king and the other with two queens. I was supposed to have the first, but you didn’t tell me you were inviting someone else. This shithole’s booked full now.”

Your gaze fluttered away as they all turned to you. You bit your lip, frowning. Did Scaramouche not recognize you? He was acting like he didn’t. He was treating you like he would any stranger. That upset you, but for the entire car ride, you were also preparing for it. It probably would’ve hurt worse if you hadn’t mentally prepared yourself.

Heizou grinned, slinging an arm over Scaramouche’s shoulder. “I suppose you have no choice but to share a bed with us.”

“No.” Scaramouche picked up his luggage and started rolling away. “Heizou, Kazuha, Aether, you share the king.”

The three men turned to you instead, surprise visible in their expressions. It was exactly because Scaramouche decided to share a room with you, whom he never acknowledged since you arrived.

You wanted to protest. If Scaramouche didn’t recognize you and opted for a choice that didn’t involve sharing a room with anyone, you’d rather sleep on the floor in Kazuha and the others’ room. But Scaramouche was already stepping inside the elevator and was holding the door for you.

You held your gaze to the floor the entire time as Scaramouche pointed at a room and told the three they would sleep there. Scaramouche flashed the card against the door of your room, then stepped inside.

“This one’s ours,” Scaramouche said. You couldn’t detect any hint of emotion.

The room was bigger than the two rooms at your apartment. It had two beds, as Scaramouche said, and a TV across. The room was cold as fuck. You shuddered, and Scaramouche remained unbothered with his layers of clothes that probably cost more than you.

As Scaramouche set his luggage on the bed closest to the window, you gathered the courage to not make this trip any more awkward.

You breathed in deeply. “I’m Y/N—”

“I haven’t forgotten.” He arched an eyebrow as he sat on the edge of his bed, staring at you. “Have you forgotten about me?”

“No, no, of course not,” you said. “I could never forget you, Kunikuzushi.”

You stiffened, thinking it was a mistake and there must’ve been a reason he was called by another name, but you took a look at him and got distracted. His face relaxed when you said his name.

I could never forget you. It was sickeningly true. You can never forget about Kunikuzushi. He was your first love. He was so cute with his wide eyes; and he was very clingy, too, which made him all the more endearing.

But looking at the present Kunikuzushi, with his intense stare and permanently bored expression, he was hot, and you started to think that maybe your type was just Kunikuzushi.

Horror settled in your stomach as Scaramouche flashed a wicked grin.

“Then you wouldn’t mind sleeping with me, would you?”

“He said what?” Heizou cackled, hitting the wall as he threw his head back, laughing.

Scaramouche meant it as sleeping in the same room, but he could have— no, should have worded it better. Scaramouche laid down on his bed right after and went on his phone as if he didn’t say anything at all. You blurted some half-baked excuse and left the room to cry about it in your friends’ room.

When Scaramouche said their room was assigned a king bed, you didn’t expect it to fit five people—and Scaramouche said he wanted it for himself? The bed was incredibly big, almost in a lonely way. You have never seen an Alaskan king bed before, but now, sitting on the edge of it, felt as if you could fit your entire apartment on it.

Kazuha was in between Heizou and Aether, their backs resting on the headboard. They were about to sleep, too, but as soon as you burst in, they settled into position and listened intently. Except Aether, kind of; he was texting his sister, who was demanding a room tour.

“I never thought he would be this bold. I mean, demanding to share a room the moment he laid his eyes on you? Wow,” Heizou said, looking terribly criminal with his expression.

“It is surprising,” Kazuha mused. “I’ve witnessed how women flock to his feet and how he bat them all off like he never saw them.”

An unpleasant feeling washed over, which was weird because why would you be upset? Of course they’d flock to him—with a face like that. He had the looks and the personality that would garner him a lot of masochistic fans if he were a character in a drama.

“Does that happen a lot?” The way you spat it out spelled exactly how upset you are.

“No need to get so jealous, now. After that display, I’m positive that he wants as much as you want him,” Heizou laughed, falling forward and resting his elbows on the mattress. He moved his chin to his palm. He looked like he was going to ask if you wanted to paint nails and curl hairs the next second.

Your face felt hot. What was this conversation? You’d much prefer painting nails than talking about this. “I don’t want him!”

Heizou arched an eyebrow. “No?”

Even Kazuha looked doubtful, which was enough of a blow.

“I’m just confused,” you insisted. “You know what happens when you’re in a room alone with an objectively attractive guy? You get confused.”

“I get it,” Aether said, setting his phone aside to share his insight. “This is your sexual awakening.”

“What? No!”

“It definitely is,” Heizou agreed. “Why else are you crying about this to us?”

There was a sense of impending doom at realizing that Heizou was brewing some horrible, horrible thoughts in that head of his. “To stop feeding into my madness!”

Heizou clicked his tongue. “How do you think he feels? His childhood best friend came back to his life looking like that—I’m surprised he hasn't eaten you right up yet.”

You didn’t know what was more horrifying: Heizou implying he thought you were hot, or him implying that he thought Scaramouche thought you were hot.

Your face must’ve looked like a constipated mix between flustered and horrified; Kazuha chimed in to tell Heizou, “You should be more careful with your words. I’ve never met anyone as possessive as Scaramouche.”

“It’s already a miracle he even remembers me. He wouldn’t get jealous. I doubt he actually wants me that way,” you sighed.

“Oh, but you want him that way?” Heizou asked.

You wanted to slap that expression off Heizou’s face. “Of course I do. He was so cute when we were little—I already liked him then. I didn’t think he’d grow up to be so…”

“Sexual awakening,” Aether said again.

“Ow,” Aether whined when you hit him square on the head.

Reluctantly, you returned to your room. Heizou, Kazuha, and Aether told you to get your shit together and face this not-sexual-awakening like a man. Kazuha didn’t say it, but you could feel that he was also thinking it. And if he ever said it out loud, you’d tell him to go fuck off to Liyue already.

Scaramouche was awake. The door clicked shut, and you faintly felt like those heroines locking themselves up in a room to hook up with someone who they didn’t think was the murderer on the front page right now.

“Where did you go?” he asked.

You tried not to let your surprise show, but Scaramouche was staring so intently that you would’ve failed miserably either way. “The other room.”

The longer you looked at him, the more you realized that Kunikuzushi felt like a fever dream. Being only a few feet away from the guy you used to be so fond of, now grown and had an air of haughtiness that would’ve been a turn-off had it been anyone else— it was doing things to you.

“Are you scared of me?”

You laughed and nearly choked on it when registering that Scaramouche was still looking. It wasn’t something like embarrassment. It was more like laughing unabashedly and then sensing that your hallway crush walked past. Maybe it was a bit of embarrassment.

“No. No, I’m not scared.” You moved to sit on your bed, eyes trained on the wall. “You didn’t tell me you were back.”

“You changed your number. You moved out.”

“Oh.” You did do that. Your apartment was very far from your home.

“And I figured you forgot about me or wanted to forget about me because of what I did to you.”

“Oh.” You wanted to say that he didn’t affect you that much. Life goes on; you meet new people and lose them every day, and all that. But Scaramouche was affecting you that much, especially when he’s only a few feet away from you, looking like he wanted you to pounce him.

Scaramouche grinned lopsidedly. “But I guess I don’t have to worry about that anymore.”

What the hell does that mean? Your heart skipped a beat. Did he figure it out? Were you that obvious with your thoughts about pouncing?

Scaramouche stood up from his bed, moving towards yours slowly. “Are you seeing anyone right now?”

You tried to avoid getting too close by leaning back, but he kept drawing his face closer, bending towards you. You’re one last tilt away from him pinning you down on the bed.

“No,” you blurted before you could even think about it. It was a little difficult to think about anyone else when you were a breath away from kissing. “Why?”

Scaramouche’s eyes narrowed, electric indigo. “Do you still have a crush on me?”

“You’re asking too many questions.”

“We’re catching up. This is how it works, doesn’t it?”

No, it was definitely not how this worked. Your neck was starting to ache with this awkward angle, and he hadn’t even answered your question.

“Do you?” he repeated, hovering above you.

You gave up on the painful angle and laid flat on the bed, frowning up at him. You crossed your arms to achieve the stance of someone who will not back down easily. “How are you so sure I even had a crush on you?”

“You’re telling me I’m wrong?”

What was this? Some fucked up game of 21 questions, but Scaramouche was too high and mighty to follow the rules? You didn’t know what to say to that. You wisely decided to stay silent, glaring up at him.

You probably didn’t look intimidating at all. Scaramouche smiled, much less sharper. Almost fond as his eyes flicked down to somewhere below your nose. “Am I still the only one for you?”

Okay. You would back down easily if he kept looking at you like that.

“You didn’t hurt me, Kuni.” You sighed. “You never could.”

Scaramouche straightened, his face carefully blank. It was much harder to read him like this. You sat up, wanting to ask if it was the wrong thing to say. You couldn’t get the words out because he lunged for a kiss.

You might have gasped. You might have made some embarrassing noise while a laugh rumbled from the back of Scaramouche’s throat. But that was all thrown out the window the moment your eyes fluttered shut and you lost yourself in the sensation of his warm mouth on yours.

He pushed closer, and you were pulled back on the mattress, his arms on either side of your head. Your eyes flew open when Scaramouche nipped at your lip. As if suddenly remembering where and who you were, you forced his chest back and gaped.

“What?” He looked irritated you interrupted him.

“At least say it back!”

“You didn’t even say it,” Scaramouche said, one eyebrow raised.

“I like you, Kunikuzushi.”

Scaramouche turned red and then looked humbled that you saw it. “I still like you, too.”

You looked at him up and down. You asked, but you didn’t want to hear the answer. “And you didn’t have anyone while you were in Sumeru?”

“Of course not,” Scaramouche scoffed. “You think anyone there was worth my time? You think I’d settle for less than you?” He scowled. “How about you? Nevermind, don’t answer that. I don’t want to know. I’d do it better than any of them.”

You laughed, tugging him close with your arms around his neck. If anyone were to come in, they would assume the worst. Then again, maybe Scaramouche had plans to indulge in the worst.

wake up! let’s eat breakfast at the restaurant we saw yesterday!

ask scaramouche. so he can pay for us

Despite the freedom and space of lying on separate queen beds, you and Scaramouche were huddled and pressed close. And despite books in your bag, you were occupied with huddling and pressing close against Scaramouche. You were lying on his chest while he had an arm resting on your stomach.

As soon as Heizou’s texts appeared on the top banner of your screen, you looked up, and Scaramouche looked like he was going to murder someone.

“It’s a joke, probably,” you said. “They don’t see you as a wallet.”

“It’s not a joke,” Scaramouche said. “I don’t really care about that. You and Heizou close?”

“He’s the one who introduced me to Kazuha and the others.” You sat up from the comfortable position and stretched.

“So you’re close.”

“Oh, very much so.” Then you laughed at Scaramouche’s thunderous expression. “Idiot. Why are you jealous? He’s not the one I’m sharing a room with and was making out with last night.”

Scaramouche’s gaze cut down to your neck. He looked extremely pleased.

You and Scaramouche took the elevator down, holding hands throughout. You felt a little giddy. What must this look like to everyone else? They’d all assume you were out with your boyfriend. As you reached your friends, Aether had just started the car. Kazuha slipped into the passenger seat, and Heizou waved at the both of you.

Then Heizou gasped. Aether turned to you and gasped as well.

“What happened to you? You look like you were mauled by a tiger,” Aether asked, scandalized.

“If the tiger had a short hime cut and a thick wallet, maybe,” Heizou mused. You flipped him off and climbed inside the car. Heizou laughed and sat beside you.

Aether frowned. “What kind of tiger would that be?”

You groaned, burying your face in your palms and wishing that lightning would strike you down. You needed coffee. Or a beer. Maybe if you bat your eyelashes and kissed him on the lips, Scaramouche would buy you bottles of wine.

As if summoned by your thoughts, a figure forced himself in between you and Heizou. Scaramouche worked fast. He glared at Heizou and tugged you away from him.

Heizou’s eyes went wide. “What’d I do?”

“Know your place, Shikanoin,” Scaramouche said. You just wanted to at least not be half-sitting on his lap, but he was proving a point and didn’t let you budge.

Kazuha smiled. “I warned you, Heizou.”

“Damn,” Heizou said. He looked exhausted. He was the one who suggested you and Scaramouche hook up in the first place—did he not expect his intuition to be right this time? “Didn’t take you for the clingy type. Two more days of this?”

“This is not some fling,” Scaramouche hissed. “You think I don’t take this seriously?”

You smiled as your heart fluttered. Scaramouche could be so unintentionally sweet sometimes, not that you’d tell it to his face, because he would grumble and hide his face. You rather liked his face. It was pretty, and you knew that if you tugged his hood down, you’d see a bruise on his neck as well.

“Didn’t take him for a romantic as well,” Kazuha said, thoroughly entertained.

“Wait, are you actually a thing now?” Aether made a face. “What the hell happened in that room?”

Scaramouche smirked. “You sure you wanna know?”

a/n it was already so hard for me to not turn it into a heizou fic dude. That entire first part was so unnecessary i was just hopelessly infatuated. BUT ANYWAY!!1 thank you so much for reading i hope u liked it <3 if u do, leave a comment or a reblog so i can see your thoughts :DD

also, another note: on the day i wrote this fic the insta acc of scara didnt exist. so if it does by the time youve read this fic, its pure coincidence and i have nothing to do w it. or maybe i did, because i came up w the name HAHA

inumaki toge: don't try to be a genius

blurb inumaki made it a mission to figure out why you’re acting so strange around him. he considered everything except a crush. (a 3+1 fic)

# fluff, based off twice song, friends to lovers, wc 2k

the first time starts with accidental hand holding.

in all honesty, maybe you should’ve figured you would slip sooner than later. a harmless crush—now harmful given the situation with your peers, mostly named gojo satoru and panda—is impossible to hide when the first thing on your mind isn’t romance, but bloody murder.

it was a day that was not dissimilar to a vacation. 

unfortunately, students like you aren’t quite the type to be given day-offs like 20% off coupons in sunday newspapers. so when gojo-sensei said “be free, my flock! make your mama bird proud!!” like the fucking weirdo he is, all of you should’ve known that curses would be crawling everywhere in your given ‘vacation’ destination.

“if you drop one bag, i’ll kill you,” says nobara. “and don’t you dare drop maki-senpai’s bag or i’ll kill you again!”

maki shrugs at your confused look, though she looks amused. she always allows nobara to suck up to her, but everyone else is as good as gone if they try.

yuuji, local maid of the first years and now the second years, sighs. “yes, ma’am, i understand.”

you walk in a leisurely pace beside nobara and inumaki. it’s both heaven and hell, and not in the way anyone would think. hell, because the love of your life is literally right beside you and looks so content you want to pinch him. heaven, because your best friend is right there to calm you down.

panda and yuuji launch into an insightful debate about which restaurant should you all go to for dinner, and everyone else joins in the conversation, save for you and inumaki, who are happy to listen to them.

“what do you think, y/n?” yuuji asks.

“hmm,” you pretend to be deep in thought, “fushiguro-kun has good taste so i vote whatever he votes.”

megumi flushes red. inumaki makes a noise to say that he agrees with you.

they continue with their debate. you’re happy to eat wherever as long as you stay with your friends.

your hand brushes against something warm and soft; on instinct, you want to curl into it like a cat, but when you look down and realize who those hands belong to, you panic.

—oh my god that’s inumaki-senpai’s hand—

with a flinch that’s strong enough to make nobara jostle from beside you, you dart away from inumaki.

nobara splutters, ready to have your head chopped off for disturbing personal space, but abruptly stops at the sight of your round-eyed stare directed at your own hands. it takes one glance at the object of your affection to realize what’s going on.

inumaki blinks, startled and confused. “mustard leaf?” he asks you, looking around for any sign of danger.

unless you all happen to walk past a mirror shop, you doubt he’d find anything life-threatening.

“what? what happened?” yuuji looks extremely alarmed at the sight of your distressed face. “y/n…?”

“nothing!” you’re quick to exclaim before everyone else asks. “sorry, just, uhhh—” panicked because i almost held inumaki’s hand like it was second nature.

you rush to yuuji’s side and distract him with a half-baked excuse, away from an amused nobara and a confused inumaki. if anyone notices you pointedly steering clear from inumaki, they don’t say anything.

you sit next to yuuji and fushiguro, despite inumaki leaving space for you.

it goes mostly normal for the rest of the night.

meanwhile, inumaki looks deeply perplexed at everyone acting like there’s an inside joke he’s not getting.

“inumaki? what’s up?”

maki quirks an eyebrow when inumaki slips a paper for her and panda to see. they read the words slowly, understanding dawning on their faces.

did i do something to upset y/n?, the note reads.

panda looks like he’s about to shit himself with how happy he looks. not an appropriate response, inumaki thinks, a little upset. “no, you didn’t do anything to upset y/n!” he says gleefully, which is like, totally suspicious.

“you’re so dumb,” maki rolls her eyes, flicking the paper back to him. it lands on his head, and she pats it. “you’ll figure it out soon.”

inumaki wants to figure it out now. he doesn’t like that you’re avoiding him, and he makes it clear with a mildly aggressive: “bonito flakes.”

maki and panda only laugh.

he makes it a mission to figure it out, much to your chagrin.

the second time starts, unfortunately, with gojo-sensei. and this time. inumaki is acutely aware, unfortunately.

“my lovebirds!” gojo chirps with a happy clap. you grimace and inumaki makes a confused noise. “my wonder duo! are you both up for some high-ranking missions, hm?”

“sensei, inumaki-senpai just got off from one,” you tell him.

inumaki shakes his head at you. “bonito flakes.”

gojo hums with amusement. “hmm? you want to do it?” and at your deadpan glare, gojo grins, because he’s a maniac who knows about your silly high school crush. “he wants to do it! if y/n-chan only wants his say in it, then we’re good to go.”

gojo may act like a fool—and he is, honestly—but he’s right about one thing, and it’s how you and inumaki fall into unspoken ease with teamwork, one that’s strangely limited to the both of you.

halves of the same whole, nanami once said. you didn’t have the heart to tell him it’s because you are in love with your supposed other half.

you assure gojo that it’s only because inumaki is strong enough to protect both him and his teammate, and gojo calls bullshit and says no matter what your technique is, you and inumaki make a formidable pair despite the year difference.

the thought of that makes you a little happy. and gojo takes advantage of that by sending you both off to missions more than anyone else.

but you don’t mind, not really. not when you get to spend time with inumaki, who’s so easy to be around with.

inumaki seems pleased that the Vacation-Day-Incident is long forgotten and you two fall back into a friendly routine.

“inumaki-senpai, here.” you toss him a small bottle of cough syrup you like to carry around in case of emergencies.

he looks surprised at the sight of it. “tuna mayo?”

“ah, yeah,” you chuckle sheepishly. “i notice you run out sometimes when it gets too rough so i always have extras with me.”

inumaki has a funny expression on his face, and it’s one he makes when he’s frustrated he can’t say what he wants to.

you clear your throat. “you don’t have to thank me, it’s no trouble—oh, what are you—”

inumaki shuts you up by taking your hand and gently kissing your knuckles.

you make a noise that’s somewhere between a yelp and a strangled squeal, which he seems to find amusing.

you know he did that to show gratitude when he can’t express it verbally, but did he have to do it like That…?

you feel your face heat up and you pull away from him like you’ve been burnt, missing the displeased frown on his face. “um! gojo-sensei is probably waiting for us.”

inumaki’s gaze is intense. “mustard leaf?”

inumaki feels like you’re pushing him away again. maybe you’re uncomfortable around him? that seems most likely. no one else had flinched from his presence that way before.

inumaki feels a bit sad, now. he’s not sulking—maybe—but gojo pats him on the back and wishes him luck and to push through with his mission. (inumaki never told anyone about it, but it’s gojo-sensei and he knows everything so he accepts it with a nod of gratitude.)

all in all, it was a very unfortunate end to the day.

the third time it happens, you’re stuck in a forest with him.

it’s a mission involving all of the first years along with inumaki (he found you guys on his way back) this time, and still, you end up alone with inumaki. it’s like the universe is conspiring against you or something.

or maybe it’s nobara not-so-subtly pushing you to inumaki’s direction every five minutes.

you don’t mind.

“yuuji-kun sure attracts trouble like a magnet, hm?” you muse, jumping over a root tall enough to reach your thigh.

inumaki smiles. “salmon.”

“i can’t help but worry, though,” you sigh. inumaki nudges you with an elbow until you look at his silent expression. “yeah, yeah, yuuji-kun is strong. and nobara and fushiguro-kun are strong enough to protect him, but it’s so—bleurgh.”

inumaki seems to accept your explanation. “tuna.”

you check the weather. “d’you think we should hurry up—”

“explode!”

that was not your voice.

alarmed, you turn your gaze back straight ahead. you almost trip over your own feet at the sight of a deformed caterpillar-like sludge creature that crawls out from the trees, similar to the one inumaki just killed.

the curse claws at your face.

you recoil from its grasp. “oh, gross!” you pierce your sword through it and watch it fizzle out of existence, flailing limply in your blade. you twist it around just to make sure. “that was gross,” you repeat.

“mustard leaf?” without warning, inumaki takes hold of your chin—NNHHHGG????!—for his eyes to roam around your face to check for any scratches.

you love that he’s getting comfortable with you, you really do. best friends forever, or something like that. but that doesn’t mean you don’t get to freak out about it when you quite literally feel his breath on your face.

you sputter some excuse and hurry away from him, heart pounding.

inumaki goes still, eyes stuck on the spot you were standing on before you ran away.

the frantic looks directed to anywhere but him, the embarrassed noises, the stammering—

maybe you’re already in a relationship?

he’s not sure what to feel about this mission anymore.

inumaki toge is standing outside your room.

yuuji spots him as he’s on his way back to his, and waves. “inumaki-senpai? what are you doing here?”

inumaki waves back and points at your door. “tuna tuna.”

“oooh, we’re at that part, alright,” says yuuji like that it isn’t the most cryptic dialogue one has ever heard. “do you want me to check if y/n’s there?”

“katsuobushi.”

“okay, okay! don’t look at me like that.” yuuji laughs. “i’ll leave ya to it. good luck, senpai!”

“mustard leaf…”

inumaki shakes his head and knocks on your door.

there’s a confused snort from the other side. you probably just woke up, inumaki thinks to himself with a small smile, and it doesn’t fade when you open the door, disheveled.

your eyes widen. “i-inumaki-senpai?” you blurt out louder than intended. both of you can hear a poorly stifled cackle from nobara’s room.

inumaki holds out his phone, letting you read out the words pre-written on the screen: i came here to apologize.

“what? wait, wait— what? what happened?”

inumaki types on his phone for a few seconds. i made you uncomfortable the past few days. i didn’t mean to do that.

you stare at him, blinking slowly. “made me… uncomfortable… what…?” then— “oh. oh! oh no, no, no. no, ahh this is so embarrassing.”

“mustard leaf…?” inumaki instinctively reaches out to you, but then stops himself when he remembers what he’s here for in the first place.

“inumaki,” you laugh in disbelief, “why are you apologizing as if it’s your fault i have a crush on you?”

what?

he gapes—he’s sure he’s gaping, but he can’t help it. his jaw drops even more when you don’t take it back, or even announce that you’re joking. you’re not joking. with a finger scratching the nape of your neck, you smile sheepishly. “i thought i was being obvious, but maybe not…?”

inumaki can’t help but mutter a soft, “oh” of realization.

it turns out he’s got it all wrong.

“oh,” says inumaki again.

he curses, and then shoves his phone away to take your hands. “salmon!” he exclaims, and he sounds so relieved and happy and you’re looking like you want to run away again. “salmon.”

“i’m sorry, i’m not sure what you mean—”

inumaki huffs and pulls his collar down. he’ll just show you.

it ends with a kiss.

remember when i said when i write jjk fics it would only be for inumaki? yeah well. TA DAAAAA ( ´ ▿ ` ) you should be worried tbh bc i literally have no idea wtf im doing with these characters

୨୧⸝⸝ : and i promise, this time i won’t be late.

PAIRING! idol!wonbin x fem!reader GENRE! fluff, angst (quite a bit this time i think) WARNING! just wonbin tryna be a good bf alsooo not proofread WC 2.5k

NOTE! smth shorter to make up for the fact that i haven't written anything in ages, sorry for disappearing off the face of the earth it will happen again

wonbin finds himself praying that you're still awake right now. he looks down at his phone for the thousandth time, wincing every time the minute changes.

it is currently 1:06 in the morning. running an anxious hand through his hair, he continues to glare at the time being displayed as though it would go back a few hours if he stared hard enough. he thinks about sending you a message to verify whether or not you're still up, but decides against it with a shake of his head. he already feels terrible, and he thinks that if you happen to be asleep right now and wake up to his sorry, pathetic message the next day, it'd only make him feel worse.

lost in thought, wonbin doesn’t even feel the arm that wraps around his stiff shoulders until the person touching him decides to speak. “you’re coming with us, right?” sungchan asks, causing wonbin to look up for the first time in what feels like hours.

all the boy can utter is a “what?”, meeting the eyes of his taller group mate. “the corner store down the road is still open,” sungchan explains, “we’ve been talking about stopping there since practice ended. were you not listening?”

wonbin takes a deep breath, running a hand through his hair once more. he hadn’t been listening, of course, because the moment practice ended the only thing on his mind was getting back home to you. it wasn’t a rare occurrence, but practice only seemed to drag longer than normal today, and while wonbin knows that you’ve always been understanding of the fact that he comes home late, he can’t help but feel apologetic. he tells himself that he owes it to you to come home on time just once, and he’s blown it again.

1:10 in the morning. “sorry,” wonbin breathes, “i can’t go.” he doesn’t say anything more than that, and he doesn’t have to. sungchan drops his arm from the younger boy’s shoulders, instead opting to pat him on the back reassuringly. in the same sense that this isn’t wonbin’s first time coming home late, it also isn’t the first time he’s had to bail on his friends in exchange for arriving at your shared apartment just a bit earlier, even if it doesn’t make much of a difference. despite everything, wonbin is still late, and there’s no changing that.

sungchan nods, “next time, then.” wonbin offers him a nod in return, and the older boy only gives him a smile and a wave before turning around to catch up with everyone else. wonbin is frozen for a moment, watching the silhouettes of his group mates get smaller and smaller before he finally begins the journey back to you.

1:45 in the morning. wonbin holds his breath as he opens the door to your apartment, making very minimal noise. he still prays that you’re awake, but can’t blame you if you aren’t.

he wants to call out to you, the same way he wanted to send you a text earlier, and the same way he wanted to arrive at a reasonable time for once. he keeps his teeth clenched.

it’s 1:50 by the time wonbin stops in front of your shared bedroom. you’re sleeping— he’s sure of it. despite this, he still can’t find it in him to regret making an attempt to come home sooner. he knows that you’d appreciate it if you knew.

he pushes open the door and there you are, a tense look adorning your face as you sleep. he takes note of how you likely weren’t even sure if he would be home on time or not, yet you still stayed to your side of the bed. whether it be due to routine or simply because you were hoping that he’d show up, his heart drops nonetheless.

he quietly walks over to you, pausing when he reaches your side. he had wished for you to be awake up until this moment, but finds it ironic that he currently doesn’t want to wake you. he doesn’t even realize that he’s subconsciously moving hair away from your face until it’s too late, and does nothing to stop himself once he notices.

letting his hand drift down slightly to stroke the side of your face, he releases a shaky sigh. “i’m sorry, my sweet girl,” he whispers, watching with somber eyes as your expression softens as if you’re able to sense his presence in your sleep.

he makes his way over to his side of the bed and he knows that you won’t be affected by the way the mattress dips slightly as he lies down, because he’s done it so many times and you’ve never once woken up from it.

2:01 in the morning. wonbin hates that he can only lie beside you for a few hours before having to leave again, before you even get the chance to open your eyes. it’ll be as if he was never there. it’s completely out of his control, and wonbin knows that, but he hates it. you’d tell him that it’s alright, the same way you’ve done several times, but he hates it. he hates every bit of it.

it’s 11:01 in the morning by the time you wake up, and you don’t need to turn around in order to know that you’re the only person in the room. wonbin had been here, this much you know, and you wish that you had stayed awake longer if it meant being able to see him, even for a moment. you wish that you had woken up abruptly at some point last night if it meant being able to see his sleeping face.

you don’t dwell on the thought for long— you never do, knowing that it’d only make your situation a lot harder to deal with. you feel around your bedside table in search of your phone, not having the strength to get out of bed just yet.

strike one, you think to yourself. on the rare occasion that you wake up and wonbin is by your side, he always lightheartedly scolds you for checking your phone first thing in the morning. he’d disapprove if he saw you right now, but he isn’t here to stop you, so you do it anyway. coincidentally, the only notifications on display are from the boy in question.

[6:23 AM] my bin <3: hiii babe

[6:25 AM] my bin <3: call me when u get the chance!!!!! i’ll be available (i will literally drop everything and pick up)

[6:26 AM] my bin <3: i love u pretty ….. 🤮

your mood lifts just by seeing his name on your screen, a surge of energy coursing through your body. you decide to go about your normal routine, the idea of calling your boyfriend never leaving your mind.

it’s 11:20 by the time you make it downstairs, everything looking the exact same way you left it. wonbin is nothing if not organized; if there’s any disarray in your apartment, it’s all from you. unfortunately, this means that there’s not many traces of your boyfriend left behind, and you often hope for him to forget to hang up his coat or line up his shoes by the door just to prove that he’s there.

you walk into the kitchen and the first thing you take note of is that you still haven’t taken out the trash. strike two, you think.

you made a mental note to take care of it a few days ago and you still have yet to do so. wonbin hasn’t been around enough lately to notice, but you know he’d jokingly give you a roll of his eyes if he saw the way it’s practically overflowing right now before proceeding to take it out himself. he’d do the same with the dishes piled up in the sink, chatting away with you while he took care of everything like it was no problem, and to him, it really wasn’t.

god, you miss him.

you pull out your phone, disregarding everything else as you click on his contact and hold the device up to your ear. it rings only 4 times before you hear wonbin on the other end.

“i was hoping you’d call,” he says, and you faintly hear the voices of his group mates in the background. you almost let out a laugh at his words, just to fill the silence, but it only comes out as a quick exhale. “why wouldn’t i? you told me to. and i would’ve, even if you didn’t tell me to,” you murmur, your words leaving you faster than you wanted them to.

“i just don’t feel like i deserve it, i guess,” he replies. you’re about to ask him to elaborate before he continues. “i stopped by last night. i’m sorry i couldn’t come sooner, i really tried.” you pause at his choice of words, wondering if he even noticed that he said “stopped by” rather than something along the lines of “came home”, as if the two of you don’t live together.

you shake your head, deciding that you’re looking too much into it solely because not being able to see your boyfriend is taking a toll on you. “don’t apologize, bin,” you exhale, “i’ve told you a million times i understand. there’s not really anything you can do about it.”

you know he’s probably shaking his head on the other side of the phone, or running a nervous hand through his hair the way he always does. “i know, just- i’m sorry. i want to see you.” you nod, and he doesn’t see it. “i want to see you, too,” you reply. “should i wait up until 3am today?” your words are meant to be taken as a joke, but wonbin immediately retaliates. “you better not! your beauty sleep comes before anything else.”

you talk with him about anything that comes to mind and it’s as easy as it always is. when he tells you that he has to leave and get back to practicing, the two of you exchange prolonged “goodbye’s” and “i love you’s” before you finally pull the phone away from your ear with a sigh. you think that hearing his voice only made you miss him more.

when you look up from the phone you’re once again greeted with the trash can, as filled to the brim as ever, and you think taking it out would make for a good distraction. not far from it, the dishes are still piled up, and you consider washing them. you don’t, though. strike three.

you spend the rest of the day going through the motions, body moving on autopilot as it does quite often lately, and at the end of it all you look back on everything and think that it had all been normal— aside from the fact that wonbin doesn’t come home.

despite his initial protests, you’re awake until 3:26 in the morning. you’re not sure what time he arrived home last night, but you think that it couldn’t have been later than this.

you had made sure to take a nap at some point during the day just so you could be awake at this moment, to see your lover, talk to him, even if it had only been for a few minutes.

you shoot him a text, praying that the urgency you feel can be expressed through the little amount of words you send. you fall asleep waiting for his response, only to wake up to an empty phone, and an even emptier bed.

if there was barely any traces of wonbin in your shared apartment before, there definitely isn’t now; his lack of presence was evident the day before despite the fact that he had been there for merely a few hours, but after last night?

for a moment, it almost feels as though you live by yourself.

12:03 in the afternoon. swallowing the sudden lump in your throat, you make an attempt to go about your routine as normal. you can already picture the sight you’ll be greeted with downstairs— an overflowing trash can, the accumulating dishes in the sink, only this time, there’s no messages from wonbin asking for you to give him a call or telling you that he loves you.

to your surprise, by the time you manage to trudge downstairs, you aren’t greeted by any of those things.

the trash can that had been previously close to spilling over has been emptied, an empty bag now taking its place. there’s no dishes in the sink, all of them instead sitting in the dish rack waiting to dry. before you’re able to turn around and demand an explanation, you feel arms wrapping around your waist, and you swear that your eyes almost fill up with tears.

“my sweet girl, i missed you,” wonbin utters from behind you, and in an instant, you’re spinning your body around and returning his embrace. he can sense that you’re about to ask him a myriad of questions, and opts to continue talking before you can get a word in. “i’ve only been here for about an hour or so. i’m sorry i couldn’t come home last night, baby.”

you shake your head, about to offer him the same reassurance you always do, when he begins to speak again. “i practiced until super late last night. i wanted to finish learning the choreography as fast as possible—“ you open your mouth to scold him, pulling away from his chest momentarily when he cuts you off for what feels like the thousandth time. “—and before you yell at me, it was for a good reason,” he pouts, waiting for you to press your lips into a tight line before starting to speak again.

“i overexerted myself a bit, i think, but it was all worth it. i’m all yours for the next few days,” he finishes, a hand stroking the back of your head. the two of you stand there for a while. “i love you’s” and “i missed you’s” are exchanged rather than goodbyes, and neither of you are willing to move from your positions, blissfully unaware of the passage of time for once. it’s alright, though— you both have time. a lot of it.

for a moment, wonbin gets the urge to apologize again, whether it be for all the times he’s arrived home late, or for leaving you alone with an overflowing trash can or a sink full of dishes, but it’s almost as if you’re able to read his mind. “don’t feel sorry anymore, bin,” he hears you say, voice muffled against the fabric of his shirt. he only nods, the words dying on his tongue. he decides that he’ll accept your reassurance just this once.

wonbin isn’t sorry, because this time, he isn’t late.

AUTHOR’S NOTE! beabadoobee my wife

🎧 txt as — late night texts!

txt as various late night messages they send to their s/o! | requested via poll!

warnings — suggestive content in taehyun’s, angst in yeonjun & kai’s, swearing, kys used in a joking manner, mentions of kissing, lovesick tubatu

genre — smau, crack, established relationship, fluff

[note] — i have nothing to say for myself... i just want all of them to hold my hand expeditiously. like soobin i'm available anytime!! 🥲

ᰔ yeonjun

ᰔ soobin

ᰔ beomgyu

ᰔ taehyun

ᰔ hueningkai

© GYUMIBEAR. do not repost, modify or translate my work onto other social media sites

Summary: Nagi finds out your secret, so now your relationship with him changes while you're still gaining new members for your team. You pass to the third selection, waiting for Chigiri to come, when the Top 6 players are announced, will you be on it?

Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10 -> Masterlist

…"Come, Isagi Yoichi, you can have a front row seat of my ascension to the world's number one"

A few seconds pass before Isagi stands up, starting walking alongside Bachira before he turns around

"You guys, I'm sorry" he says "we…we were just one step short of beating them, that last goal was pure luck it's no-"

"Shut up" you cut him off, trying your hardest to not look so in pain "he chose you, that's it, so leave"

"What Yn said" you heard Barou, and then Nagi said something too, but you were too in pain to properly pay attention to any words. You noticed that he turned around and left, your body finally starting to give up on you.

The moment the gate closed, you started feeling like you were falling, almost hitting the floor completely if it wasn't for an arm wrapping itself around your waist. You didn't quite pass out this time, but you were barely conscious as you feel whoever was holding you help you pass your arm through his neck

"Hey, can you walk?" You hear by your side

"I…guess" you barely managed to answer. You hear a sigh before some arms lift you out of the floor in bridal style, quickly going to the locker room

"You. Let him sit there for a few minutes and find a way to help him gain air, I'll go to try to find someone" you hear while slowly helping you sit on the bench. Thanks to the change in lighting you can see a white hair in front of you as the black hair leaves the room.

You didn't notice when Nagi made you take off your white vest, let alone when he managed to take the top part off your body, leaving you just with the binder on.

"Hey, I'm unclipping this, you need to breathe properly"

You hear, but the words don't fully process until you feel Nagi's hand unclipping the front of your binder. Your hand moves instinctively, trying to stop him, but he's faster and stronger than you, so he grabs your wrist and fully unclips it. You finally are able to grasp a full breath of air, moving your other hand just in time to cover your chest as your head starts to clear up.

You were topless, your breasts were clearly visible, and Nagi was in front of you.

"I…I can…I can explain" you say, eyes wide open. Nagi was, understandably, looking at your chest confused, a blush quickly started spreading across his face.

"...you better have a good one" he says turning around, giving you one of his clean sweater "put this on for now"

You put the top, so big on your body that was able to fully cover the existence of your chest. By now you weren't dizzy anymore since you were properly breathing again, but your body still felt sore. You tap Nagi's shoulder

"I'm done" you whisper, Nagi turns around, looking at the side awkwardly

“So…this is why you never shower with any of us?” he says, still sounding nonchalant despite of his face

“Yeah, you guys are not supposed to know about this”

“But why? You're amazing, but isn't this supposed to become the best striker in the world…? you're a girl"

"It's a long story…basically i was a-"

"Here is the idiot" Barou enters alongside Anri, who looks bewildered at you "Take him to get checked or something, we can't afford to lose that ass because of how careless he is"

"Sure, come with me Yn" she says to you, so you move to stand up forgetting that your legs were still feeling like jelly. You stumble, almost falling if it wasn't for Nagi once again, who grabs you one more time to help you walk towards Anri "I'll take it from here, I'll make sure he's okay"

Anri helps you out towards an empty room that was equipped with a simple futon on top of a table. She helped you sit down there, passing you some water

"Everything alright? I watched the match with Ego-san, you were really good" she says, making you nod "he was kind of impressed by your team, how much all of you evolved"

"Thanks" you say "if…i wanted to tell someone about…well, me…how do you think Ego-san will react?" You ask shyly

"Huh? Well, I can't say he would be pleased if you did that…but then again, he did want you to only help him for the first selection. Why are you asking me?"

"Just wondering, after all at some point I'll have to leave, and i would like to tell my friends the truth"

"I see, you're probably worried about whether they'll still be your friends after…I'll talk to Ego-san about it, now go to take a shower so you can go to rest"

You did exactly that, you were feeling much better with a proper shower, but now all your body was in so much pain that you just wanted to lay down. You go back to the three bed dorm, collapsing in the single bed as soon as you get there.

"Oh, you're back" you hear after a few minutes "are you okay?"

"Yeah, i just ran way too much today" you say, sitting in the bed to face Nagi

"You did good" he moves to pay your head, stopping right before touching it as he looks at you "is it okay? You don't mind me doing this?"

"You don't have to treat me any different, as long as you're comfortable with it it's alright…you can keep seeing me as a dude if you want"

"That wouldn't be fair to you..i bet you're pretty confused about all of this, after all it has been a few months of being referred as a dude" he says finally ruffling your hair before sitting next to you

"I can't deny that it has been rather…confusing, i thought everything will be okay, but i feel like it's slowly making me insane"

"I imagine, i guess it would be better if you just did it throughout the day, but here you have to pretend to be a boy 24/7"

"Yeah, it's hard, I'm starting to feel like an imposter in my own body…aren't you mad at me? I'm not the person you thought i was"

"Why would I be? The only difference is that you're a girl instead of a boy, and i like your personality, so it's not like there's much change for me" he simply shrugs "you can be your true self around me, at least it will help you release some tension"

"Thanks" you sigh, slowly you lay your head on his shoulder, finally being able to relax a bit more. You both stayed like this for a few more minutes before you remembered "did you tell Barou?"

"No. It's your secret, not mine"

"Thanks, can you keep it a secret though? You guys shouldn't know about this"

"I can, but i think you should tell Chigiri about this, he's your friend too" he takes his phone out, starting to play a game. Despite him finding out the secret he didn't seem to be too affected by it, still treating you as he did previously. Must be a Nagi thing, he didn't seem to care about it, so you decided to tell him the full truth

"I have known Ego-san since I was a kid. I was the only girl in my neighborhood, so I often played soccer with the other kids. That's why now he asked me to join, he wanted to have a special person that can help the boys to fully evolve"

"Ahhh, so you're like a spy then. That's really cool, you're cool Yn-chan" he answers, making you chuckle

"You could say so, yeah"

"You know, this makes it a little bit clearer for me" he starts saying as the game on his phone shows that he lost. He turns to look at you, with almost a boring expression "I like being with you; at first i thought that it was similar to Reo, that we were friends, but it felt different and i didn't know why"

"Eh?" You look at him wide eyed, was he saying what you think he's saying? If it was, how come he looked so nonchalant? Your face started to feel warm. "What do you me-"

"I thought you were here, idiot, i brought you your dinner" Barou enters the room with a tray of food, sounding and looking rather annoyed "considering your state, I'll allow you to eat here"

"Thanks" you say, fully aware of your redness as Nagi restarts his game. You could swear there was a tiny smirk on his face. Barou looks at both of you rather confused, but he doesn't say a word about it

"I'll be nice today and let you take that bed, i doubt you can stand anyway" he passes you the tray, fried chicken on it "but you better be in good shape for tomorrow match or I'll kick your ass myself"

"I'll be, don't worry. Thanks for the food" you start eating as both of them start talking about the next match, how you should work things out and who could complement you. You couldn't help but feel some lightness in your chest at the thought of finally being able to be yourself with someone, even if it was just one person that knew for now, it still feels rather good.

You won the next two matches, gaining Zantetsu and Kiyora Jin, an all rounder that had a whole eye covered. It was right after the reunion with Ego in which he announced that you would have a 5 vs 5 match against world class players, leaving some of you confused.

"I see…so we have to…cut corners?" Zantetsu asks looking at his book and adjusting his glasses

"Eh..nope. Not really" you say trying to not laugh

"BakaZantetsu" says Nagi, taking his phone out and laying down on the floor, his head on your leg as he opens his game. He seems much more comfortable with skinship between you two, the rest just assuming his lazy side was taking over with you since you two know each other the longest "are they good?"

"You're kidding? They're one of the best players out there, playing for the most respected teams in the world. The buzzcut one plays for his national team and is only 17" you rumble

"Wow, that's so cool. And we'll play them?"

"Yeah, if anything, i bet that this isn't even for us to win, just to show us how behind we actually are"

"This will be a challenge, it'll be…easy peasy? Is that right? I think that's right" Zantetsu adds

"I'm surrounded by idiots," Barou sighs "No matter what or who it is, we'll win. I'm going to eat now"

And just like you said, you sadly lost that match. You weren't even able to score a single goal against those players, overwhelming your team to no end.

You are now entering the third selection joint room, where every team that has passed will join in the order they clear the previous one. You were the second team to clear the stage, so you saw Isagi and Bachira already there.

"Sup" Nagi tells them

"It feels like we saw each other forever ago" you say

"I'm here, you scrub" Barou adds

"Heyy! Zantetsu is with you too!" Bachira screams at you, waving his hand

"You guys…" Isagi says as you approach him

"Huh? Why do you look so relieved, isagi? Don’t tell me you actually thought we might not make it?" Nagi says, squinting his eyes

"Eh? No, no…That’s not it"

"You bastard, you were totally looking down on us! You cocky little…" Barou grabs Isagi by his t-shirt

"You're still treating us like your supporting cast, huh?" You add, hitting his back lightly

"That's not it.. I'm just really happy to be able to see you again guys" Isagi says, making you hit the back of his head

"Like i will lose" you say, making him chuckle

"Of course we were going to see each other again, i wasn't going to let it end here after losing to you" Nagi answers

"I promised to kill you, and I haven't even beaten those top 4; hell, I haven't even beaten Yn and he's in the top 2!" Adds Barou

"Yeah, there's more games for us yet!" Isagi says, if only he knew that you could leave at any moment

«Moving on! Next team, please enter»

The voice comes out of the speaker, making you all look towards the door. You were hoping to see Chigiri coming from that door soon, you kinda miss his remarks through this. Suddenly you feel some weight in your shoulders, two arms passing through your chest in a lazy manner as a chin is on top of your head

"Ahh, standing is such a pain" Nagi says lazily, looking at the door with you as he whispers in your ear "we'll see them soon, Yn-chan, don't worry"

"I know, but I'm still worried"

When the next team enters, you notice the Yukimiya dude that you talked with briefly before alongside people you've never seen, one looking like the captain of the volleyball team of your school. Not a sign of Chigiri or Reo so far. More teams come in, by the sixth one you meet again with Raichi and Gagamaru, which means…

"Just one more team left, and Chigiri, Reo or Kunigami hasn't come yet"

"Yeah, they'll come, they have to" Nagi unconsciously leaned slightly closer.

The door lifts up slowly, igaguri and the boy with only one braid coming first. You're nervous while waiting for the other two shadows to come out, breathing relief as you see Reo and Chigiri appear.

"Reo!"

"Chigiri!" Both you and Nagi exclaim at the same time, a smile appearing on the red hair when he sees you, a smile that soon disappears as the last person of his team starts to appear. A tall and tanned skin dude, with spiky hair.

«That is the the last of those who will advance to the third selection»

"Did…did Kunigami lose?" You ask Chigiri while Isagi asked Reo, the spiky dude was saying something to Isagi

"I…didn't see him, I assumed he was here" the red hair answers, looking just as distressed. Suddenly a pit on your stomach appeared, guilt starting to build up. You weren't supposed to be here in the first place, in a way you took Kunigami's place by playing, and that will only continue to happen the longer you keep being here

"...a shitty hero like him with all his purity and seriousness, was just a slime that couldn't even give me a power up" you hear, which make you raise your eyebrows

"I'm gonna kill him" you whisper angry, cracking your knuckles and almost going to him if it wasn't because two hands take your arm

"Don't" Nagi says

"You're not match for him" Chigiri teases you while looking annoyed at him too "you think Kunigami will let you do that?"

"...Shut up" you say, making him chuckle right before he instinctively reacts to grab Isagi out of the way of that spiky dude, who tried to kick him.

Nagi grabs your arm a bit tighter, moving you slightly so you can avoid any confrontation

"I don't like him, he give me the creeps" you say

"Me neither, don't get close to him" Nagi tells you right when Ego appears on the TV

"Alright, that's enough, you unpolished gemstones, any further violence and I'll have you forcibly eject" Ego says. You sigh, ignoring him like you always do whenever he goes on a rant about something; but from the corner of your eye you can see Reo looking at you and Nagi, the latter shamelessly having his arms draping on your body as he rest himself on you

"Following up in the third selection, after the language studies, well… some things came up, i’d originally planned on whittling down the group until only five of you remained, but there’s been a change of plans" you started paying attention once again, in the very beginning Ego had give you a light overlook of how the selection process was going to be, so that now he changed of plans was unusual "It seems that the overlords of the Japanese football world have made up their minds to stamp out blue lock as soon as possible, which is why i’ve fired back at them with a challenge. So, your next selection will be in three weeks. It’ll be a match with the continued existence of blue lock at stake…japan national u-20 team vs blue lock select 11-member team…if you win this game, blue lock will hijack the japanese national u-20 team"

"Bro, that's insane" you say, everyone in the room was surprised by said words, understandably so. Nagi fully stands up, just as surprised as everyone else.

"...well our opponents will also use every card they have available, so they'll add one member to their rooster…Itoshi Sae" he says, you move your eyes towards Rin, who seems surprised about his brother joining the opponents team "LET'S GO, YOU UNPOLISHED GEMSTONES, THE ONES TO CHANGE THIS ERA WILL BE BLUE LOCK!"

Everyone stays surprisingly quiet for a few seconds, everyone seeming to be processing this whole lot of information given. So now you´ll have a match against the Japan U-20 team? You could understand that the people of the JFA wanted to shut down this project, you cant imagine just how much money all of this would have cost, but even if they think they´d would win, this is such an amazing opportunity, a good chunk of blue lock members will be able to join the national team if you win. After a few seconds a few boys started to question how the 11 members will be chosen, and overall questioned how forwards will be playing in different positions.

"The formation of the blue lock team will center around the following six names I will now call out. Given your overall evaluations as of this moment, these individuals rank as the “Top 6” with the goal of putting together a team in just three short weeks, this method will be our best shot. Those who are called, step forward" Ego says, the ambience changing one more time to expectations "The overall N°1, Itoshi RIn, N°2 Shidou Ryusei.."

“Agh, that bastard is that good? How annoying” you whisper, a few chuckles from Chigiri and Nagi

“Stop having beef with the top players” Chigiri nudges you playfully

"Next, N°3 YN…" Ego continues

"Eh?" You say at hearing your name

"That's our friend!" Chigiri now ruffles your hair, Nagi joining as Isagi and Bachira both extend their hands to high five you

"Moving on…N°4 Karasu Tabito; N°5 Yukimiya Kenyu and lastly N°6 Nagi Seishiro"

"Hey, we're in the Top 6" you lightly hit his chest playfully

"Of course we are" in that moment Yukimiya asks something to Ego, explaining how the order of the ranking was selected; you chuckle when the old Team Z members start whispering surprised at the fact that he was a model

"First, the Top 6 will separate into pairs in descending order and will be assigned A, B and C rank" continues Ego, meaning that you were in a group with Tabito and whoever else chooses your team "This is the final task of the revised third selection with a position as a regular on Japan's national U-20 team on the line. IT'S TIME FOR YOUR TRYOUTS"

"We won't be on the same team, bummer" you hear Nagi say "you should have placed lower"

"Or you could have placed higher" you retort, nudging him lightly

"First, the Top 6, you all will proceed to a different room" Ego says while the door underneath the Tv starts opening, you start walking towards there alongside Nagi as you wave your hand to your friends

"Pleasure to see you again" you hear beside you, Yukimiya smiles at you. He was undeniable attractive

"Same here, and to think we could have team up in the second selection" you answer, making him chuckle

"Right? We could have been an amazing team, considering that both of us are in the Top 6" you nod to his comment, sitting on one of the puffs that were in the room as Nagi sits on the floor, his head laying on your leg. The TV seems to be on a waiting screen, only displaying the words 'Top 6 VIP Room'.

Nothing has gone to plan so far, you should have left a while ago, but somehow now you were in the Top 6 players out of this project; besides, you didn't know how much more will you be able to pretend to be a guy without feeling guilty for taking someone else spot..How long will you be able to last?

"Oi, you alright?" Nagi asks you, making you snap out of your thoughts

"I am…just thinking"

"Hello, hello diamonds in the rough. By fighting to come this far all of you have undoubtedly proven your place as Blue Lock's elite" Ego says as he keep explaining his ideals "... And don't you dare have your position taken by someone not in the Top 6, you all stand at the very peak of Blue Lock. The football that you create will become the blades that destroy Japanese football, remember that. I want to see all of you rise up for the challenge"

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Taglist: @suyaaachin - @anurst - @celestair - @futuristicxie - @miyanaranagikenmal-intp - @kaldurahms-lover

“Baby, I promise I was kidding.”

“I don’t want to talk to you right now, Rintaro.”

“‘Rintaro?’ Baby, it was a joke! If I knew it would actually make you upset, I wouldn’t have done it.”

Your eyes are watery and pouty when you look at him, and he blinks down at you expectantly. Then you huff, “of course I’m upset! It’s a sign of disrespect.”

Rintaro groans and squats down in front of you, head moving back and forth to keep his eyes locked on yours as you try to move your own gaze, “baby, I swear, I didn’t mean it, I thought it would make you laugh.”

He never thought hitting your Pompurin plush would have you in such shambles. You’ve been ignoring him all ride with a small grimace on your lips, playing with Pompurin’s arms and tiny feet, sometimes answering questions about what’s on the tag. You’re deadset on ignoring him. It’s destroying him.

With a small sigh, he leans up to try and plant a kiss to your lips, despite the fact that the last thing he’d think you’d want is a kiss. It’s something he knows you adore, though, he hopes you see through your anger to see him.

You do pout out slightly to try and chase his lips, and it fills him with relief.

“It was pretend, baby,” he mumbles, trying to convince you. “I’d never mean to hit him, I was pretending to be mad that he’d take you away from me.”

Well. It was only half pretend.

But you don’t need to know that.

You gently twist pompurin’s ears in your fingers, shrugging and shaking your face from his hands slightly. “You hurt my feelings Rin.”

Once again, he grabs your chin, leaning up to press another kiss to your lips. “I know, baby. I thought it’d be funny.”

“Say you’re sorry.”

“I’m so sorry-“

“Not to me,” you grumble. “To him!” You hold up the new pompurin plush, and Rintaro tucks his lips in his mouth to hide the annoyed sigh that wants to slip out.

Annoyed, albeit still endeared.

Green eyes hyper fixate on the doey eyes of pompurin, smacking his lips and nodding in respect. “I’m sorry, Pompurin. I never should’ve hit you. And I hope you’ll consider forgiving me and taking care of them while I’m at practice.”

In his peripheral, he sees you smile, your fingers shifting to move pompurin’s head to nod.

“Thank you for apologizing,” you say as you lower the new plush animal. “I love you.”

He smirks and leans forward one final time to kiss you, and you giggle in the kiss and toss your arms around his neck.

If he could guarantee you’d always be this affectionate after, he’d playfully smack all your stuffed animals.