Not Me Getting A Weird Stabby Pain The Back Of My Skull And Then Debating If I Should Close The AO3 Tab

[ID: lettering art by OP. In the center the message "free Gaza" in red text is combined with the Palestinian flag and black blocking to make a square shape. The lettering for "free Gaza" has three red drops of blood in the enclosed parts of the letters. The background of the entire thing is a light tan color. In each corner is a motif of an olive branch. On the top and bottom of the border is written "free the people free the land" in red text, and on either side of the border is written "ceasefire now! ceasefire now!" in matching text. /End ID]

so when straight people ask me why I say I’m “queer” or “gay” instead of sharing my actual identity as a panromantic demisexual non-binary sapphic queer I just tell them “ok look, when you’re talking to someone who isn’t local and they ask you where you’re from and you either say the name of the largest city nearby or ‘town name, suburb of large nearby city’ so they can get some geographical context of where you’re located right, bc they’re probably not going to know the name of the little town you actually live in.”

but if you’re talking to a local you can say the name of your actual town bc they have a greater chance of knowing where/what that is.

ok well when I’m talking to a straight person I start with queer bc chances are they aren’t as familiar with the context of all the little towns in that big queer city and need gps (gay positioning system) to find me.

if I’m talking to another queer person and I say I live in a suburb of gay city in a town called panromantic on the demisexual side of the tracks which is in the county of queer and I live off the intersection of non-binary and sapphic, they’d probably be able to find me with little to no problems, make sense?

Vanessa Lubach - Tabitha's Kitten linocut

sometimes life puts you in the same situation again to see if you’re still a dumbass

@effervescent-liminality @moniquill what say you to this proposition? (Evil smirk)

The concept of british colonization from real life

Elphaba: We’re a team now, right? Ride or die? Glinda: Sure, I would totally ride you. Elphaba: What? Glinda: What? Fiyero, loudly: She said she’d ride you.

“Back in the eighties dungeons were becoming a thing in New York. Guys would pay a lot of money to come there and have some dominatrix tell them what to do. I was making leather pencil skirts for a lot of the doms, with holes in the back so that guys could kiss their ass. One day I was fitting a dom named Asia, and I told her: ‘I bet I could make more money than you without wearing stuff like this.’ She bet me I couldn’t. It was all a big goof. But then I started really thinking about it. Asia was making $150 a session, and that was real money. So I did the same thing I always do when I get an idea. I just ran an ad in the back of the Village Voice. Most of these girls were advertising how young they were. So I used the word ‘mature.’ And I figured out how to write ‘Jewish Guys Welcome’ in Yiddish, and I put that at the bottom. It was some of the easiest money I ever made. I never let them touch me. All I had to do was be a bossy black woman. And I could do that easy because my mother had been such a bitch. I’d pretend to be a school teacher, or a nanny. It was the dumbest shit. I just kept inventing crazy scenarios. And the crazier the scenario, the more money I made. One time I heard about a dom on the Upper East Side who charged $3,000 a week to kidnap a guy and lock him in her basement. I didn’t have a basement, but I knew a limo driver named Dean who liked to hustle like me. So every time I got a call from a new client, I’d say: ‘You want to be kidnapped, don’t you?’ And he’d start stuttering like: ‘Duh, duh, duh, duh.’ And I’d say: ‘Listen to me closely. Stand on the corner of 5th and 18th tomorrow at 3 pm. Don’t be late.’ Then I’d call Dean and tell him the plan. It was always easy to spot the guy. He’d be the one checking his watch and looking scared as shit. So we’d roll up in the limo, grab him by the collar, and pull him inside. Then I’d lock the doors and start telling him what to do. Everything went down in the back of the limo. Dean just rolled up the partition and kept his eyes on the road. At the end I’d give him $100, because I was getting $250 for that.”

-Happy 81st birthday to Stephanie 'Tanqueray' Johnson. If you see her wheeling around Chelsea today wish her a happy birthday, and there is a nonzero chance she will give you a glow-in-the-dark dildo eraser. -Humans of New York

Maomao: Not to worry. I have a permit.

Court lady: This just says, "Maomao can do what she wants" with master Jinshi signature.

happy April fools day you weeaboo shits *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you* *hits you*

reblog this for good luck