Regulus, Making His Best Man Speech At Sirius' Wedding: Statistically, The Person You Marry Is Most Likely

Could you turn off likes and follows as an edblr account you put others you follow at risk of a mass term

ofc anon! done it now, and i can’t believe i had forgotten to do so before. thanks for the reminder!

okay fine 🙄 I'll be the one to ask..

since we're talking about remus and sirius: how is their sex like? are they weirdos like rosekiller or more on the vanilla side?

sending this on anon bc i feel like a Perv

♡♡ wait but i'm so glad you asked... to be honest the most major thing i see for them is a daddy kink. but in a way that differs wildly from whatever faux-daddy-kink thing rosekiller has going on.

the thing rosekiller has going on is like

(barty voice, extremely loud) YO.. DADDY’S GETTING HIMSELF A CAPRI SUN. YOU WANT ONE?

the most important thing to me is that wolfstar is a kinky couple but they are CORNY about it. they're unabashedly corny (but it's sort of cute, that they are). they're doing role-play with the little outfits, they're calling each other "daddy" & "princess", they probably own shibari ropes, and it's very domestic and stupid and lived-in (it's corny millennial kink-couple vibes, a little 😭). there is way less of the complex psychosexual veneer that i give other pairings

r/s is the heavyweight CHAMPION of daddy dom/babygirl relationships. sirius wears frilly panties & stockings that their daddy picked out, remus manhandles his little princess with his giant hands, and i think they would lean into the dynamics pretty hard in general?

remus brushes sirius's hair and does their pigtails. sirius can pout and swing her legs to get what she wants. i've had my brain chemistry fundamentally changed by fiveht's "disarm you with a smile" & greenvlvetcouch's "birthday boy" series.

(rosekiller is doing daddy stuff but in an insane faux-pederastic psychosexual freudian way where barty is working through his childhood trauma by perving on evan's innocent virginal fragility. come sit on daddy's lap, bunny. let him touch you in that place that makes you feel funny...) (this is why they're my faves)

the size kink is another major element... the fandom debates this every few months, but I'm firmly on the side of beautiful fairy princess sirius w/ her Gigantic Werewolf Husband. it's actually incredible that remus is able to fit inside her.

if you see sirius (5'3) holding remus's hand (6'5), you're briefly amazed at how their pretty head barely comes up to his collarbones.

cockwarming is definitely a huge thing for them. remus keeps her stuffed while he's grading papers, in bed in the morning, idly bounces her on it while they're watching a movie... he likes to see her pretty face when she gets overstimulated & cries

^AND he's doing this because she's always fucking bratty!!!

i just really believe that we should have the freedom to lean into the Wattpad-ification of it all. wolfstar can be really beautiful and complex (the most complex, even!), but r/s doesn't always have to be the most serious & best representation or whatever. i'm a rosekiller blog so i can carry the cross of "dainty elfin sirius in a little pink negligee & bunny-tail butt plug getting absolutely demolished by her wolf boyfriend's werewolf knot while he's in a rut, or whatever"

i think when they do sexy roleplay they make each other do voices, actually. they're dorks about it. they're dorks about everything

the marauders fandom be like:

any time i hear the insufferable transphobic athlete arguments i think of that one time in middle school when my boys lacrosse team did a full-contact scrimmage against the girls team (who typically play with limited contact) and i, a six-foot, 180lb defender, got utterly laid-out by this 5-foot-nothing girl experiencing the newly-unleashed animosity accompanied by violent sport and as i looked up at my assailant from flat on my back i experienced a brief bout of heterosexuality and fell wildly in love and then had to be taken to the ER because i had a concussion

YES

it's come to my attention when I say I like jegulily it doesn't mean the same thing as when the rest of you say you like jegulily

they are so much more to me than two pieces of a polycule or queer platonic relationship that happened to share a boyfriend (which all of those things are fine, however not what I thought we were going for)

I meant lily is fucking reg with a strap. they are well oiled machine in the kitchen and if anybody else comes in there while they're working they will die. they are holding each other and sharing kisses well getting railed by James. they have a silent communication between each other that is so perfectly in tune it scares everybody. they purposely get pregnant at the same time and are each other's birthing partners for lemaze and frequently referred to their children as the twins post birth.

the two of them are in a relationship with each other just as much as they are in a relationship with james 

pride flag butterflies 🌈

Sirius: sooo cute

*the four on a double date, passing by a children’s toy shop*

Sirius: *arm linked with Remus’s, pointing to the window* Look, Reg, you used to have a stuffed bear just like that.

James: *to Regulus* oh my god you’re so adorable

[flashback to Regulus as a child]

5 year old Regulus: *talking to a teady bear* You have five days left to live, Mr. Bear. I think we should just pull the plug now, give you a nice, clean death.

[present time]

Regulus: yes..good times

Sirius: Next person to say “weird flex but okay” is getting thrown of the astronomy tower.

Regulus: Preposterous boast but alas.

it’s 2025. you will never know peace, @derinthescarletpescatarian

“If I had time travel I’d kill Hitler” “If I had time travel I’d stop my favourite politician getting assassinated” you’re all thinking way too small. If I had time travel I’d stop Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin from dying on the moon due to Soviet sabotage, kicking off the Great Nuclear War and devastating half of the planet.

meeeeee

Reblog if you've ever stayed up all night to read a fanfiction about dead gay wizards on a School night