Phos-phorus - Nikolas

I'm sorry but is this supposed to look like they were NOT just fucking in one of their driver rooms? nico tucking in his shirt does not help with the allegations.

If I had the chance to start over || Launt

It got out of hand. I got lost in my own writing while listening to chances on repeat. I startet writing this fic at around 10:30pm and its now 3am so please excuse any mistakes etc and let me know if there are any!

Summary: James has had feelings for Niki for a long time now. He never ends up confessing tho and one day the despair hits him so hard he gets himself so fogged with alcohol and drugs that Niki has to come and save the day once again. Meanwhile James finally opens up about his feelings.

Silverstone

The roar of engines filled the air at Silverstone as James Hunt pulled his helmet off, shaking his golden hair free. James leaned against the pit wall, he glanced across the pit lane as his gaze fell on Niki Lauda, cool and composed, discussing strategies with his team. There was a magnetism to Niki that James couldn't quite shake off, a quiet strength and an enigmatic presence that drew him in.

James found himself watching Niki more than usual. Every precise movement, every calculated decision, and the sheer determination etched on his face fascinated James. He wondered if Niki ever noticed the stolen glances, the lingering looks. It was a fleeting thought, quickly buried beneath a brash smile and a casual shrug. James Hunt wasn't the type to dwell on feelings, especially not feelings as confusing as these.

"Hey, Hunt," a voice called, snapping him out of his reverie. It was one of the mechanics. "We filled her up. Ready for another round?"

James smirked, masking the tumultuous feelings inside. "Always am."

But as he climbed into his car, his mind still kept wandering to Niki.

Monaco

The glamour of Monaco was intoxicating, with its sun-soaked streets and opulent yachts. The competition was fierce, the stakes higher than ever. Yet, James found his thoughts straying towards Niki. They had become rivals on the track and, somehow, confidants off it. There were late-night conversations, hushed and intimate, where they shared dreams and fears over drinks.

One such night, James almost blurted it out. They were on the deck of a yacht, the sea breeze ruffling their hair. Niki was talking about his plans for the next race, but James couldn't focus. His mind was racing with words he couldn't say.

"I admire you, Niki. More than you know," He managed, his voice thick with unspoken emotions.

Niki smiled, a rare, genuine smile. "I know, James. I feel the same."

The words hung in the air, open to interpretation. James' heart pounded, but he said nothing more. The moment passed, leaving him with a bittersweet taste of what could have been.

Belgium

There was no reason for him to be this happy. After McLaren made changes to the car it became difficult to drive and James ended up lurching all over the track, holding other drivers up, and eventually retired with gearbox failure.

As the race ended and Niki emerged victorious, James found himself clapping louder than anyone else, his admiration barely contained while his engineers just scoffed at him in disbelieve. He didnt care though. He stopped doing that a long time ago.

Zandvoort

James often caught himself watching Niki, thinking about what might happen if he took the leap and confessed his love.

But he never did. Instead, he masked his feelings with a reckless lifestyle—partying, women, and substances. Each time he saw Niki's determined face, the longing in his heart grew stronger.

The celebration after James's latest victory was in full swing. Champagne flowed, laughter echoed, but James felt a hollowness inside. Across the room, Niki was engaged in conversation, his sharp features softened by a rare smile. He was talking to Marlene, a beautiful woman who seemed to be the only one who could break through Niki's stern exterior.

James's heart ached. He downed another glass of champagne, trying to drown the jealousy and longing that gnawed at him. What if he had taken that chance, back in '73? What if he had told Niki how he felt?

Watkins Glen

James stood in the shadows, watching Niki with Marlene, her laughter ringing out like a melody. He turned away, unable to bear the sight, and retreated to his hotel room. He saw them together often, and each time, a part of him shattered, and James cursed himself for never having the courage to confess his feelings. He never dared to hope.

Trying to numb the pain, he drowned his sorrows in alcohol and drugs. The party raged on, but James felt increasingly isolated, lost in his thoughts.

Tokyo

The neon lights of Tokyo painted the city in vibrant hues. The race was over, the celebration in full swing, but James was nowhere to be found.

In his hotel room, James poured himself another drink, the alcohol mixing with the drugs he'd taken earlier. The room spun around him, memories of races, laughter, and stolen glances merging into a painful blur.

He wondered what might have been if he had confessed his love. "What if I told him?" he muttered, downing most of his freshly poured drink "What if I just told him I love him?"

What-ifs and could-have-beens crashed over him in relentless waves, each one more unbearable than the last. His vision blurred, hot tears spilling over and streaming down his cheeks.

James collapsed onto the floor, staring at the ceiling as a sob ripped through him, raw and guttural, shaking his entire body. He tried to wipe at his eyes, but the tears kept coming, a torrential flood that refused to be stemmed. His fingers brushed against his cheeks, smearing the tears, mixing them with the alcohol he spilled.

Each sob grew louder, more desperate, as if he could cry out the anguish that had settled deep within his soul. Arms wrapping around his knees, he curled into himself, rocking back and forth in a futile attempt to find comfort.

His breaths came in ragged gasps, the pain in his chest tightening with every exhale as the room around him seemed to dissolve into a haze of sorrow, the shadows closing in, suffocating him with their presence.

The desperate banging on the door was muffled at first, almost as if it were part of the whirlwind in his head. James barely registered the noise, consumed entirely by his grief. It grew more insistent, a rhythmic pounding that seemed to match the frantic beat of his own heart. He heard voices calling his name, but they were distant, like a dream slipping away.

The door swung open with a force that startled him, and there, framed in the doorway, stood Niki Lauda, breathless and wide-eyed. Niki’s face was a mixture of confusion and concern, his eyes wide as he took in the scene before him.

James looked up, his vision swimming through the tears, and saw Niki standing there, silent and stunned. For a moment, everything froze. The banging on the door had stopped, replaced by an eerie silence that seemed to stretch on forever. Seeing Niki there, so vividly present when he’d only imagined him in his sorrow, was both a comfort and a fresh stab of pain.

Niki took a step forward, his eyes never leaving James’s. “James,” he said with a forced calmness, the name hanging heavily in the air. “Scheiße, James, what happened?”

"I'm sorry," he choked out between sobs, his voice barely a whisper. "I'm so, so sorry."

He didn't know who he was apologizing to—Niki, himself, the universe. It didn’t matter.

James tried to speak once more, but the words caught in his throat. He could only stare up at Niki, his emotions laid bare, his sobs a stark admission of his despair. He wiped at his face, trying to regain some semblance of composure, but the effort was futile. The weight of his sorrow and regret was too much to bear.

Niki knelt beside him, his expression a mix of sadness and empathy. He reached out a hand, carefully pulling James into a sitting position, supporting him with a firm but gentle grip. “I’m here, alright? We’ll get through this.” he said, his voice steadier than James’s own trembling hands. “Just… just breathe. In Gottes Namen was tust du dir nur an.”

James clung to Niki, his sobs finally quieting and his breathing slowing down. The room still spun, but now there was a lifeline amid the chaos.

Niki stayed with him, the weight of unspoken words hanging between them, but in that moment, the silence was enough. They sat together on the floor until Niki was convinced James wouldnt fall over or start sobbing again as soon as he let go of him.

He helped James to his feet and guided him to the couch, ensuring he was seated comfortably before moving to fetch a glass of water and some painkillers.

“You can't keep doing this to yourself. Ich kann nicht immer da sein um auf dich auf zu passen." Niki murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. " You need to stop this—drugs, alcohol. You’re destroying yourself."

James’s eyes followed every movement of Niki’s. His gaze was unwavering, even as he struggled to stay conscious. He was too weak to respond verbally, but his eyes spoke volumes, filled with a mix of regret and adoration.

Niki moved about the room, tidying up and picking up the discarded bottles with a practiced efficiency, cleaning the mess and making sure James was well enough to avoid a trip to the hospital. Despite his frustration, there was a tenderness in his touch, a silent promise that he wouldn’t leave James in this state, no matter how much James had hurt himself.

As Niki worked, James began to whisper to himself, his voice barely audible over the sound of Niki’s movements and his own ragged breathing

"If I had the chance to start over… the first person I’d seek out would be you, Niki."

Niki froze for a moment, his hand hovering over a dirty glass. He looked down, catching James’s eye for a split second. There was something in James’s gaze that made Niki pause, his heart aching despite the anger he felt.

“I should’ve... I should’ve told you, should’ve taken the chance while I could” James continued as he looked up into Niki's eyes “I would’ve done it right this time. I would’ve told you everything. I would-”

"You need to drink your water." Niki interrupted harshly as he turned to put the glass and the empty whiskey bottle on the counter.

“I’m sorry,” James whispered again, his voice breaking. “I didn’t... I didn’t know how-”

Niki leaned in to check James's pulse once more but remained silent, his presence a comforting anchor in the storm of James’s emotions. The weight of the words that James had never said lay heavily in the room.

In a halting voice, he continued, "I... I love you, Niki. I've always loved you. And I know I've messed everything up, but if I had another chance, I'd do it all differently. I'd do it right."

For a long moment, Niki said nothing, just knelt there, processing the words that hung heavy in the air. He finally shook his head slightly, as if to clear his thoughts, and resumed tending to James, his movements a little gentler now.

Making sure James was settled in bed, his head resting on a pillow and a glass of water within reach, Niki turned to leave, casting one last glance at James.

“Rest, James. We'll talk more when you're sober. I’ll be around if you need anything." he said softly, his voice lacking its earlier harshness.

He turned off the light and quietly left the room, leaving James alone in the darkness.

James lay in the darkness, tears streaming down his face once more. He had finally said it, but it felt like he had lost everything. He clung to the hope that maybe, somehow, he could fix things. But for now, he was alone, begging the universe for a chance to turn back time.

The room was silent, save for his whispered plea, "I didn’t mean for it to be this way. Please. Please, let me go back. Let me fix this."

But the past remained unchangeable, and James was left to face the consequences of his silence, his heartache echoing in the empty room.

Niki as Karl Lagerfeld and James as Jacques de Bascher.

I said what I said

There’s a reason why it’s in my Kimi playlist ✋🙂‍↕️

does anyone else find ‘psycho’ by muse a rlly horny song or is there just something wrong with me

"Leave my hand." "You first..."

I might start to post my little launt notes if the fandom is still alive.

First time actually actively using tumblr so idk how this really works.

I think I’ve read almost every Launt ff on ao3 and I need more so I might as well add to the collection

Breaking Point - Valewis FF

Valewis fic i talked about earlier!

Won't be able to finish it today but decided to post the first part of it anyway! Please read the warning!!!!

TW/CW: eating disorder, Vomiting

And as always: Any mistakes please ignore or let me know. Thank you!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Valtteri sat at the long table, the buzz of voices around him fading into a blur. The air in the meeting room was heavy with the usual technical jargon, the upcoming race strategy, tire choices, and performance analysis, but none of it sank in. Valtteri was staring blankly at the figures flashing across the screen. The lights where too bright, and the words spoken by the engineers and team principal felt distant.

He hadn’t eaten properly in days, and his body felt it. The tight knot in his stomach was a familiar companion now, gnawing at him relentlessly. The hunger was always there, but the idea of eating, of trying to force food down when everything inside him felt twisted and wrong, seemed impossible.

At least he was weighting less than Lewis now.

His chest tightened as the pressure built inside, a familiar gnawing feeling creeping in. No matter how hard he pushed, how much he trained, it never felt like enough. The weight of never being enough—never quite living up to the expectations, to the dominance of his teammate, Lewis—sat on his shoulders like an unbearable burden. He had been struggling with this for months—long, agonizing months of trying to control something that seemed so utterly out of control.

He was drowning in it, struggling to stay afloat.

But it's his own fault, no? It's what he signed up for all those years ago. Valtteri should be used to it by now. It was part of the deal.

He glanced at Lewis across the table, the man who made everything seem effortless. Lewis, always calm, always composed, with a confidence Valtteri could never seem to find in himself. His thoughts raced, louder than the voices around him.

It's not his fault. I just need to be better. Why can’t I be better?

The room felt smaller.

His palms grew damp with sweat, and his pulse quickened.

His stomach churned, a twisting pain that had become all too familiar. The pressure of racing, of constantly being compared to Lewis, of always feeling second-best, had chipped away at him. The pressure had seeped into every part of his life, his mind a relentless critic.

He could feel the room spinning. His throat tightened, and he knew if he didn’t leave now, he wouldn’t be able to hold it together much longer. He needed to get back into control. Quietly, almost cautiously, he rose from his seat, quickly moving toward the door. His legs felt shaky beneath him, but he forced himself to walk, head down, hoping no one would notice. No one usually did, after all.

Of course they don’t care.

He headed down the hallway, heart pounding in his chest, his footsteps growing faster as he neared the stairs leading up to his Room, a place where he could break down in peace. But his body betrayed him. He couldn’t hold it back any longer.

The nausea surged, and he darted into the nearest restroom. Slamming the door behind him, he fell to his knees, hunching over the toilet. His whole body trembled as he gagged, trying to keep what little food he had managed to eat earlier from coming up.

---

Lewis had noticed.

He always noticed when Valtteri disappeared. He had been watching him for weeks—how his mood shifted, how his energy seemed depleted, how his once hearty laughter had dwindled into almost nothing. At first, he thought it was just the stress of the season, but there was something more, something darker lurking beneath the surface.

It wasn’t until he saw Valtteri’s hunched shoulders hastily leaving the room that a sinking feeling settled in his gut.

Lewis followed.

---

Valtteri knelt on the cold floor of the small bathroom, his hands gripping the porcelain edge of the toilet. His body trembled, the shame of what he was doing hitting him in waves, but it was the only way he felt in control. He hated it. He hated himself for it. But he couldn't stop.

He felt utterly alone in that moment, as he always had in the shadows of the team. But then, through the haze of sickness and shame, he heard the door creak open.

"Valtteri?" Not now. Not him. It was Lewis. Of course, it was Lewis.

His chest ached, too late to hide, too late to pretend everything was okay. He heaved, gagging as his body rejected the little food he had forced himself to eat earlier, his body convulsing as he struggled to breathe between violent retches.

"Go away," Valtteri choked out, his voice hoarse. His knuckles turning white from the force he held onto the porcelain with. He heaved again, his body shuddering as another wave of nausea hit.

Lewis stood frozen in the doorway. His breath hitched at the sight before him. Valtteri, the strong, composed teammate he had always admired, was hunched over in a position that spoke of agony and desperation. His heart clenched painfully in his chest.

"Valtteri…" Lewis's voice was a whisper, filled with concern but to Valtteri, it felt like a stab to the gut.

Valtteri lifted his head but didn't turn around. He couldn't. He couldn’t face this—couldn’t face Lewis. Not now, not like this. His eyes were wide, chest tight, as if even breathing hurt. He wanted to tell him to leave, to walk away and pretend he hadn’t seen any of this. But the words caught in his throat, choked by the raw shame and exhaustion.

He swallowed hard, trying to compose himself, to act like it wasn’t what it looked like. But it was. He knew it, and Lewis knew it too. He couldn’­­t help it. His body trembled as he hunched over the bowl once more, dry heaving, retching with nothing left to give. His stomach was painfully empty, but still, he gagged, his throat burning from the bile coming up in harsh waves.

Lewis stepped forward, the weight of the moment hanging between them like a thick fog. "Val, what—" Valtteri could feel the concern radiating off him, but he couldn’t bear it.

His body was still shaking, and he could feel Lewis’s presence close behind him. Why did he follow me? He had always tried so hard and managed to hide it before, always kept this side of himself locked away. He couldn’t bear for anyone, especially Lewis, to see him like this.

"Don't," Valtteri cut him off, his voice hoarse, raw from the strain. He didn’t want Lewis to see him like this, vulnerable, broken. "Please, Lewis, just-" His body convulsed, another dry heave shaking him as more bile rose in his throat. He gagged, coughing, the sound echoing in the small restroom. His whole body ached, exhausted from fighting this battle for so long.

"Just… go," Valtteri croaked, his voice ragged, barely audible "please."

After fighting with my Notes app and Tumblr I finally got it. The spicy (nsfw) confessional Launt ficlet I promised!! Although it’s not really a ficlet anymore. I got a bit carried away.

Anyway…! I hope you enjoy and just some warnings:

Minors do not interact!!

There’s no explicit consent (in this doc they are both horny for each other so I count that as consent)

And if there are any spelling, grammar or formatting mistakes please do let me know!

Hope you enjoy!

It was a sweltering night in Monza, and the post-race celebrations had carried on longer than usual. James and Niki had found themselves in a bar not far from the circuit, downing shots and beers as if tomorrow didn’t exist.

By the time they staggered out into the moonlit streets, they were laughing loudly, the alcohol making them forget everything that existed around them. They wandered aimlessly, their laughter echoing off the silent buildings, until they came across a small, dimly lit church.

“Look at this place,” James said, pushing the heavy, surprisingly unlocked, wooden door open. “An open invitation” He flashed a wide grin towards Niki “Never been in a church while drunk before.”

Niki chuckled, the sound echoing softly in the empty nave. “You’re a terrible influence, James.”

He shook his head but followed James inside. The dim light from the stained glass windows cast colorful patterns on the stone floor, giving the place an ethereal quality. They wandered around, whispering jokes and daring each other to do silly things.

James spotted the confessional booth and a devilish idea sparked in his mind.

“Hey! Hey, Niki, Niki! let’s have some fun! You get in one side, and I’ll be the priest. Time to atone for your sins!” James grinned, his voice slurred as he staggered into the confessional.

Niki laughed, a rare, genuine sound. “Atone for what sins, exactly?”

“Oh, I’m sure we can think of something,” James replied with a mischievous glint in his eye.

Niki, too inebriated to resist the absurdity, followed suit and entered the other side, closing the door behind him. He slumped down onto the wooden bench, the small window between them allowing their voices to carry clearly.

“Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned,” James intoned, his voice dripping with mock seriousness. “It’s been… well, never mind how long it’s been since my last confession. Let’s hear yours, Lauda.”

Niki leaned back against the wooden wall, his laughter dying down. “Fine, fine. I’ll play along.” He cleared his throat. “Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.”

James stifled a laugh. “Tell me your sins”

At first, Niki did play along, joking about minor indiscretions and taking a swig of his booze every now and then. But as the alcohol loosened his tongue, the mood shifted.

“You know,” Niki began, his voice quieter now, “there’s someone I like… someone I shouldn’t”

“Are you going to tell me about your wet dreams now?” James asked with a loud laugh as he shifted on the wooden bench to lean against the parting frame, making himself more comfortable to continue sipping on his booze.

Niki joined in on the laugh “I thought I was supposed to confess my sins, so will you let me finish?” He asked without thinking, his mind completely cloudy from the alcohol

James, intrigued and slightly more sober, pressed his face against the window that was separating the two “so you do have wet dreams?? Niki, no feelings at all, Lauda?” He chuckled and settle down into a proper sitting position again.

“Tell me more about the lucky girl” he urged, his voice a mixture of amusement and genuine interest.

Niki hesitated, took another sip of alcohol, then continued “It’s someone close to me. I think about them a lot. About us, together. It’s… intense.”

James felt a jolt of surprise, his amusement fading into something more intense. “Them?” he repeated, with a strange feeling rising in his chest. Hope?

There was only silence coming from the other side and if James wasn’t sure he didn’t hear the door open and close, he would’ve thought Niki had left.

On the other side Niki sat staring at his hands, moving only after a few seconds to finish his bottle and continue talking. He couldn’t stop himself now even if he wanted.

“Him. I think about him a lot.”

“A man?” James felt a flush rising to his cheeks, his curiosity piqued. “What do you fantasize about, Niki?”

The confessional’s darkened interior seemed to close in on them as Niki’s voice grew more detailed, describing his desires with a candor that made James flush. He felt the growing heat in his own body and started to fidget with the loose label of his bottle, trying to distract his mind from the images Niki was painting.

He shifted uncomfortably, trying to hide the effect Niki’s words were having on him.

“I imagine touching him, tasting him, feeling his body against mine,” Niki said, his voice deepening with desire. James squirmed, trying to remain composed but failing miserably. His breath quickened, and he couldn’t resist the urge to touch himself, his arousal overwhelming.

“Fucking hell” he let out with a deep sigh, almost groan, as he wrapped his fingers around his aching length. Too lost in the feeling James didn’t register how loud he actually let out that sigh and that Niki fell silent.

It took him three whole strokes before he noticed the silence. Thinking Niki was just in thought or hesitant to continue, he spoke up “don’t get shy now, tell me more.” James tried to sound as composed as possible but he had to bite the back of his free hand so he wouldn’t let out an obscene moan.

Niki chuckled slightly, already suspecting that James was getting off to his confession and maybe slightly enjoying the thought of it.

He continued to share more fantasies, this time far more detailed “Its gotten so bad that I have to leave press meeting early because thoughts of him fill my mind. Of me wanting him to just shut up and finally take me, fill me up.” His tone growing more intimate, until he was certain of what James was doing on the other side.

“I want him to take me in my garage. The motorhome. Everywhere. I imagine leaning over the workbench with him behind me, me with my back pressed against the cold wall, legs wrapped around his hips as he comes deep inside of me.” Niki continued before going silent again to listen to James ragged breaths.

“Are you enjoying this, James?” he asked, his voice a mix of curiosity and something darker.

James froze but then whispered a small “Yes” followed by a whine he wasn’t able to suppress.

There was a long pause. Then, without warning, Niki exited his side of the confessional and re-entered on James’s side. James was too stunned to react, his face flushed with a mix of embarrassment and desire.

Niki looked down at him with hooded eyes “look at you, cramped in a confessional booth with your cock out and hard, getting off to your best friends fantasies about getting fucked by a man”

He leaned down, pulled James hand back and replaced it with his own. “Tell me, James, do you imagine yourself in my place?” Niki whispered, his lips only inches away from James ear “no… you imagined yourself as the man I was talking about. Weren’t you?” He asked with a slight chuckle as he let his thumb slide over James leaking slit.

James leaned back, surrendering to the moment as Niki took control. “Niki. Please” He pleaded, the sacred silence of the church was filled with their hushed voices and James moans.

Niki pushed James thighs apart and slowly lowered his body until he sat on his knees between them.

“Do you want to know who the man in my fantasies is?” He asked, not daring to break eye contact as he lazily stroked James length.

When James nodded hastily, the hand between his teeth preventing him from letting out any sound, including words, Niki grinned.

“It’s you” he whispered before licking a broad strip over James entire length without hesitation “it has always been just you” Niki continued but hastily went back to sucking and licking at James dick.

James let out a chocked moan “fuck. Tell me that’s really true” he said, panting, as his hand moved into Niki’s hair to tug him closer.

“I would never lie in a house of god” Niki placed a kiss on the tip of James dick before wrapping his lips around it and swallowing him as deep as he could.

As Niki worked, James’s fingers tangled in his hair, his mind a whirl of emotions. The reality of what was happening crashed over him, but there was no room for regret or hesitation. In that moment, all that mattered was Niki and the way he made him feel.

Minutes later, as they both sat in the afterglow, the reality of what they had done settled in. After zipping his pants back up James looked at Niki, who was still kneeling, his eyes full of a mixture of satisfaction and uncertainty.

“Are you alright?” Niki asked, his voice soft.

James nodded, reaching out to cup Niki’s cheek. “Better than alright,” he murmured before leaning down to place a soft kiss on Niki’s lips. “Guess we both had some sins to confess”

Niki laughed, a genuine, carefree laugh that felt like a release as he leaned into the touch “Yeah, I guess we did.”

James laughed softly, pulling Niki up to have him sit on his lap and kissing him once more with a content sigh “I dreamt a lot of this.”

“Of me sucking you off in a confessional?” Niki snorted, about to add something, but James cut him off. “Hey! You know exactly what I mean so just shut up and come here.”

Before Niki could respond, James closed the gap between them again, this time capturing Niki’s lips in a firm, demanding kiss. Niki melted into it, his hands finding their way to James’s neck, gently tugging at the hair there as the kiss deepened.

When they finally pulled apart, both of them were breathless, and James rested his forehead against Niki’s. “See? Sometimes it’s better to just shut up and let things happen.”

Niki laughed softly, his fingers tracing patterns on James’s back. “You always know how to get the last word, don’t you?”

James shrugged, pulling Niki closer. “Not always. Just when it counts.”

Niki let out a light chuckle, leaning his head against James’s shoulder. They sat there in the confessional booth, the world outside forgotten, lost in the unexpected intimacy of their shared confession.

Wicked Game - Launt

Launt Fic I promised!

It's a bit late but here it is: A songfic involving Wicked Game by Chris Isaak. A/N: There are switches in PoV but they aren't mentioned.

The world was always on fire for Niki. Every race felt like a battle against time, against death, against the relentless pull of gravity that could steal his life in an instant. But there was one fire he hadn’t expected—a different kind, one that no amount of precision or discipline could extinguish.

James Hunt.

The first time Niki saw him, James was laughing, surrounded by people, completely at ease with the world.  Hunt was wild, unpredictable, everything Niki had learned to avoid. But there was something in that reckless charm, in the way James laughed like the world couldn’t touch him, that pulled him in.

Niki knew, even then, that this man would upend everything.

"The world was on fire, and no one could save me but you."

It had crept up on him, this feeling—like a slow burn he couldn’t control.

Racing was their life, and in that world of speed and danger, they had pushed each other, driven each other mad, and yet there was something—a feeling—that neither could ignore.

It was in the stolen glances across the pit, in the unspoken understanding that only they could know the depth of what it meant to live on the edge. 

But it was more than competition—it was desire, unbidden, unwanted, but there.

"It's strange what desire will make foolish people do."

Niki would never have admitted it, but there was a strange kind of thrill in James' presence. He hated that about himself. Niki wasn’t supposed to feel like this. His life was about logic, about calculated moves, and this? This was the opposite of control. 

Every time James flashed that boyish grin, every time his eyes lingered a moment too long, Niki felt something stir within him—something that threatened to break the walls he'd carefully constructed. He couldn’t allow it.

Love wasn’t for men like him, not in this brutal world where everything could be taken away in an instant. But every time he saw James, the cracks in his walls deepened.

"I never dreamed that I’d meet somebody like you."

This wasn’t part of his plan. Niki had never intended to let anyone in, especially not someone like Hunt. They were rivals—two men pitted against each other, both striving for victory, for glory. But every race, every heated exchange only tightened the knot in his chest. The truth was inescapable. He had fallen. Fallen hard. And he hated it.

Niki had tried to push him away, tried to focus only on the race, on winning. But James... James was always there, like a persistent flame that refused to die.

"And I never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you."

Niki could feel it, the inevitable heartbreak that loomed just beyond the horizon. This world wasn’t kind. It didn’t care about love, about fragile connections between two men who should have been enemies. It was all going to come crashing down. And when it did, Niki knew it would break him.

"No, I don’t wanna fall in love..."

James was not supposed to fall in love. Not with Niki Lauda, of all people. Love was not for men like them. He lived for the thrill of the race, for the freedom that came with speed and danger. But there was something about Niki—something that had slipped through his defenses before he even realized it.

"No, I don’t wanna fall in love... with you."

He had fought it, tried to brush it off as just another twist in their rivalry. Niki was meant to be his opponent, not someone who made his heart race faster than any car ever could. But it didn’t matter. He was already in too deep. Every argument, every moment of tension between them was laced with an undercurrent of something more—something neither of them wanted to admit.

"This world is only gonna break your heart."

It was a dangerous game, and James knew it. Love in their world was a risk, one he wasn’t willing to take, not in this world of fast cars and faster lives. They were destined to burn brightly and fade just as quickly. They both lived on the edge, and sooner or later, something would give. And when it did, James was terrified it would shatter them both.

"What a wicked game you play, to make me feel this way."

Niki didn’t understand how it had happened. James had wormed his way into his thoughts, into his heart, and there was no turning back now. It wasn’t just the racing—it was the way James smiled like he held the world in his hands, the way he could make Niki feel alive in a way nothing else ever had. It was maddening, this pull between them.

James Hunt had made him vulnerable.

James tilted his head, that trademark smirk playing on his lips, but there was something deeper in his eyes—something that mirrored Niki’s own torment. He wasn’t just toying with him; James was as lost in this as Niki was.

"What a wicked thing to do, to let me dream of you."

James could see it in Niki’s eyes—the same fear, the same hesitation. It was a game they hadn’t meant to play, but now they were both trapped in it. James had let himself dream of Niki in ways he never should have. But the reality of it all? It was too much. It was too dangerous. And yet, he couldn’t stop himself from wanting more.

"What a wicked thing to say, you never felt this way."

There were moments when James would catch a glimpse of something in Niki’s gaze, something that told him he wasn’t alone in this. But Niki was too guarded, too afraid to let it show. And that was the cruelest part—knowing that, despite everything, Niki would never let himself feel the way James did.

"What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you."

Niki had tried to keep his distance, tried to tell himself it was just a fleeting attraction, nothing more. But James had gotten under his skin, and now, Niki couldn’t stop the dreams from coming. He dreamed of James more than he dreamed of winning. And that was the most terrifying thing of all.

"And I don’t wanna fall in love."

Niki could feel the heartbreak coming, like a storm on the horizon. He had let himself fall, despite every instinct screaming at him to stay in control. But it was too late now. James Hunt had stolen his heart, and there was no getting it back.

"No, I don’t wanna fall in love... with you."

James looked at Niki and knew it was already too late for both of them. He had fallen in love with the one man who could break him completely. And even though he knew it was going to end in heartbreak, he couldn’t help himself. This was the wicked game they had been playing all along.

And there was no way out now.

I just wanted to send you fanmail, let you know how much I love your blog, and your writing! I think you are so talented, the way you string words together and pop the emotions off the text, your stories are so fun to read, and you inspire me so much! I'm literally one of your biggest fans, thank you thank you thank you for sharing your time, your talent, your gifts! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Thank you so much!

Words like these mean so much to me because I get really self conscious about my writing etc so thank you so so much and I’m so glad that you enjoy my silly little stories!!!!

I’m a bit busy rn with Uni and work so my posts are a bit behind but I hope a story once in a while will make y’all happy!!

Also, feel free to text me anything anytime! I also take prompt commissions or will work out concept ideas with y’all!

I just love yapping on here honestly ✋🙂‍↕️