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"Bruce adopts Billy" this and "Clark adopts Billy" that, but let me tell you as someone who was an independently feral ten year old, Billy Batson would fucking bite them

"Danny was born a Wayne" AU except he's Bruce's grand uncle. The result of a one time drunken affair, shortly before Kenneth Wayne's death, to a young unmarried woman who gave the baby up for adoption.

(Whether the Fenton's, and therefore Amity, were just ahead of their times or the DC timeline is shifted a bit so that DP happens in its cannon era is up to you. Dealers choice, though now that i know about her i just love badass widowed prohibition leader Laura Elizabeth Wayne)

Danny grows up knowing hes adopted and loved by the Fentons but something (dealer's choice) happens and he loses his family and friends (maybe the whole town goes too?). In an attempt to avoid a Dan situation he flees into the Infinite Realm and doesn't stop.

He just wanders, time passes in its weird Realms way, not that Danny truly notices. A protector spirit thats lossed everything it protected. Its a wonder he doesn't fade and he actually might've if it wasn't for his human side.

But its a tug at his core that brings him from his near catatonic wandering. Gone before he can even understand it but enough to shake him back to himself. Enough to know that hes nowhere near ready to go anywhere familiar so he continues on, his wandering no less pointless but at least he's aware again.

What feels like a relatively short time later he gets another tug, and this time he manages to follow it.

He follows it invisibly through a natural portal that drops him somewhere in New Jersey and all the way to a fancy hospital room in the gloomiest city he's ever seen.

In there he sees his half brother Patrick Wayne, though he wont figure out their connection for a few more years, holding little Agatha. She's adorable in her little dress and pigtails and her sweet face causes that familiar tug he recognizes from what must have been six years ago given the girls age.

Then a nurse comes in and hands a little bundle to what must be the mother (whos name i cant find) and Danny takes one look at the little core tugger who brought him here and just melts. Even without knowing yet that this is his last remaining family, his instincts latch on and he vows to protect and care for the Waynes.

And he does.

He finds his forgetful brother's documents and keeps Aggy company when everyone else is busy and soothes baby Thomas so his poor sister-in-law can get some more sleep. He ices fevers and bruised knees and helps on later games of hide and seek.

He very rarely becomes visible and only to the children. His grief over the Fenton's convinces him its better to protect his new family from the shadows.

Danny explores every inch of the manor, including secret passages and an underground cave system. He claims a forgotten room in the back of the attic as his own, which over the years fill up with knickknacks, heirlooms, and pictures of the family. Even a gift or two from Agatha, who hadn't stopped believing in their shadowy guardian like her brother did when Danny felt they were too old to see him without drawing suspicion.

The manor becomes his haunt and he always knows where each family member is within it. And when any guests have some no good intentions.

And when baby Bruce is born tugging at his core and with the bluest little eyes, he welcomes the fussy little thing. And makes sure dear Martha never knows just how fussy baby Bruce really is, otherwise she might've never had a full nights sleep.

Danny blames himself for not being there when Thomas and Martha die, and promises to never leave Bruces side, practically becoming the boy's living shadow. Watching over him as he gets older, secretly aiding him in his training. Danny feels a bit of pride when Bruce takes some inspiration from the old stories Thomas told him of the shadowy Wayne family protector when creating his Batman identity, glad his nephew still remembers him even if he hasn't shown himself since the now young man was six.

Danny continues to protect and care for the family in a variety of ways over the years even as the family grows.

Lightening Alfred's workload, softening Dick's falls, calming Jason's temper both pre and post pit, hiding Tim's coffee when the boy hasn't slept in far too long, providing plenty of shadows and hiding nooks for Cass, helping Damian hide the litter of kittens he found.

And no one seems to know he's there, except maybe Cass and he's pretty sure Alfred has been know since he first started working for the family. No one knows, that is, until Duke Thomas moves in and lookes right at him watching invisibly from the sidelines.

(@omnicrafts @dcxdpdabbles @hdgnj @ailithnight @nelkcats @im-totally-not-an-alien-2 i dont know, the main point of all this is that Danny's been protecting the Wayne family for decades and no one, except maybe Alfred, knew until Duke moved in)

The true question is, is it the Clark Kent/Superman effect or is it the platypus/Perry the Platypus effect?

This reminds me of that one set of cover designs for the hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy. If I remember correctly all four of those fit together to make a different image depending on how you arranged them.

I think one of DC's biggest mistakes is the fact that Billy Batson, Jon Kent, and Damian Wayne aren't an established trio

I refuse to believe these three didn't meet each other and immediately agree to start causing problems on purpose

Damian's an ex assassin, son of Batman, and the heir to the biggest crime ring in the world, who hates himself, but also believes he's the best person alive

Jon is Superman's son, and has somehow managed to convince everyone he's a Good Boy™ when his best friend is Ra's al Ghul's grandson

And Billy's a teenage boy who has/is tricking the Justice League into letting him stay on their team because he can make himself look like an Adult Man™

These three should be committing felonies together DC

Ghost Speak

Danny & Billy both talking in ghost speak about how Vlad is an asshole while having pure direct eye contact towards some of the justice leagues

Hal: *looking at Clark* uh… h-hey supes do you have any idea what they saying???

Clark: *looks just as confused and a bit terrified* I … uh have no idea

Diana: hmm I’m sure it’s fine

Okay i think Eddie should convince Steve to play a nice clean little oneshot with the party, and because it's just a oneshot he decides he can use the plot of the star trek episode "the devil in the dark". (Blob monster in mines) because 1) when asked the kids have said they've "seen the movies" but aren't as invested in it as star wars 2) it's quick to whip up and not a bad way to start a newbie (investigate these weird deaths! Oh no monster!) 3) no way would Steve know Star Trek aside from what the kids tell him so he doesn't even bother asking to make sure.

Number three is a mistake.

Because Steve's great aunt loved Trek and Steve loved his auntie, so he has watched every episode multiple times. He owns some of the novels. He's seen the movies on opening weekend. There is a box of zines from the sixties and seventies that his auntie passed down to him. Steve, by all accounts, is a Trekkie.

He just thinks it's old lady grandma stuff so doesn't really mention it except to Robin. He likes sci Fi, he's not into fantasy.

So once the session gets rolling an hour in Steve is Suspicious. He recognizes some stuff happening from his Auntie's Programs.

Eventually he decides to test the waters. He's pretty confident he knows what's going on. At some point Dustin is nagging his character and he snaps "dammit! I'm fighter, not a cleric!" And turns to look Eddie dead in the eye. (This episode is the first in which Bones' iconic line is used)

Eddie has realized that he's made a Mistake.

Steve just raises his eyebrows in challenge.

Diffusion not osmosis

This probably shouldn’t piss me off as much as it does but it does piss me off so I’m gonna damn well talk about it. People will sometimes say that for example they picked up an accent through osmosis which is wrong, wrong because that's not what FUCKING OSMOSIS IS. So as explanation osmosis is the transfer of water through a membrane (usually) down the concentration gradient (going from an area with more water to an area with less) but that's not what makes it wrong, what makes it wrong is that osmosis only applies to water. So if you literally can’t gain accent through osmosis, you can however gain one through diffusion which is basically the same thing as osmosis but applies to literally everything else except water so people really should say that they got something through diffusion instead of osmosis.

Not a lot of people really utilize the fact that the gods of the ancient world were super messed up, did jacked up stuff to people for minor inconveniences, and legit did horrific things for the lols and billy being a child is probably just as likely to do weird things to people with his magic if he feels justified in their Billy head canons: let’s change that

Someone on Twitter @s the justice league official account in their rage tweet and Shazam/Marvel has volunteered to run the account for a few days while the league’s usual guy is out. It seems like a great idea at the time, he’s well known as super friendly guy and even though he’s pretty immature at times he always seems to be the best at deescalating hostile situations with the guidance of what he calls ‘the wisdom of Solomon’.

For a good while Marvel tried to reason with them, giving evidence to the contrary for every accusation, defending his fellow league members, and owning up to his own mistakes and promises that while the league does the best they can, they aren’t perfect. None of it is good enough for them though, they argue in circles for hours.

Finally he just says, “sir, your home will be a beacon for hoards of snakes, the harvest you wish to reap will be drowned by the rain you prayed for, your milk will curdle in your mouth, and your rage will only burn yourself with every poisoned word”

And not even an hour later that person tweets that a long term work project has just been ruined for this or that reason, their coffee is rancid because they didn’t check the date on the creamer when they bought it, posts photos of at least 12 snakes writhing in their bathtub, oh and they’ve been called out for being a jerk by everyone keeping up with the thread.

Marvel/Shazam is never allowed on the Justice League Twitter again.