Rounded-cube - Cube

you say it's my villain era and what you mean is that when you were six you panicked about wearing the right thing to kindergarten, what you mean is that in middle school nobody was eating, what you mean is that you spent high school prepping for college and college prepping for adulthood and adulthood fucking lost in the system.

what you mean is that you've been good. you were a good team player. you would have never considered yourself perfectionist - those are people more popular, prettier, more successful - but you carry any flaw like a secret in you, terrified someone will desert you for the simple reality of your personhood.

if you were good you could be loved. you could be loved if you were selfless and thoughtful and caring. if you bent over for every person, if you went above-and-beyond, it would absolve you of who you actually were. deep down, how horrible that you had needs. that you had boundaries, that you had desires. you learned young that you cannot afford to cut people out of your life - you would have nothing left. it is better to live in the service of others, to supplicate. to worship. you weren't exceptional, you had to make up for it in some way. to prove to others you were worthy.

if they need you, it's the same thing as loving you. if you are always-there, always-listening, always-friendly, you are filling a role. you have a purpose. you are living correctly.

villain era, you repeat. you mean: yesterday you finally told a man no. for hours afterwards, you couldn't control your heartbeat. you mean: you've been saying positive affirmations on repeat, trying to teach yourself any new thing about how self care is necessary. you mean: three weeks ago, due to a scheduling conflict, you finally told a coworker that no, you couldn't do them a "quick favor". you have felt bad about that ever since. sure, it would have made you work late and it would have been extra stress - but you feel bad about it nevertheless.

you tell your therapist you have been leaning into evil. she asks what that means. when you tell her: sometimes i prioritize my own needs, she doesn't find it funny. she looks at you a long time.

"and that's evil?" she clarifies.

"well," you say. "feels evil to me."

I hate this so much. It’s so good but now I’m sad again

what if a version of the night we met played over the confession scene?

Oh dear…

this post hasn't left my mind since i've first saw it

There was no way they weren’t gonna win

🎉WINNER🎉

Actually Healthy Couples Clash

Morticia and Gomez Addams!

i got a college degree and the thing i’m most proud of producing in the process is a full academic presentation about what makes a himbo

I have a feeling I’ll need this later, or in an hour 🤷

Source ~ @/livedexperienceeducator

Affirmations for Self-Diagnosed Autistics

I do not need a professional to tell me I am Autistic. I am allowed to trust myself and my peers.⁣

It's okay if I realise later on that Autism doesn't really fit. I am allowed to get it wrong and change my mind.⁣

I don't owe anyone an explanation on whether I am self-diagnosed or professionally diagnosed. I am Autistic.⁣

I shouldn't feel bad for calling myself Autistic. I am not taking away resources or support from other people.⁣

Any reason for not seeking a professional diagnosis is valid whether it's due to accessibility, cost or even if it is a personal choice.⁣

I am allowed to call myself Autistic even if I'm self diagnosed because I am the expert of my own mind and experiences.⁣

I am welcome in the Autistic community and I deserve to be a part of the Autistic community.⁣

I deserve to be taken seriously and have my needs recognised and met by the people around me.⁣

Just realized I’ve never said this on here before but if you’re a Jason Todd lover and you want to cry go ahead and listen to Trophy Case by Anthony Gargiula trust me.

Paraglider and black vulture chilling

(via)

the moon asks a question by dirgewithoutmusic

illustrated by purutsukid