Her Spine Straightened At The Sound Of Her Voice, A Disbelieving Smile Curving At Cherry-red Lips As

“I’m searching for a phrase that will release everything that’s pent up in me.”

— Henry Miller, in a letter to Anaïs Nin, featured in A Literate Passion: Letters of Anaïs Nin and Henry Miller, 1932-1953.

I sold my soul to colour this… :’)

Mika Schneider

she stood back & gladly watched from the sidelines as korra navigated the rolling storm of children, her hair whipping around her as the fallout made its way over. but the sight saw a smile touch her lips, warmth in her stomach & along her skin as she watched korra clearly in her element. it was nice seeing this side of her.

but... she couldn't get over the fact that she was barely making eye contact with her, at the ready for more than the ones in their care ... did she really think so badly of her ? ... she thought they had something & whatever sticky mess they'd gotten into wasn't worth this friendship. she could HOPE that korra might open up to her but in the meantime... she knew she could at least try showing her they would always be good.

she was surprised frankly that korra hadn't taken off in a whirl of air along with the kids the first chance she got, finally sparing a glance her way. " — uh, " in the moment it took her to react her choice had already been made for her as she saw the last of the three disappear from her vision, a gentle shrug as she warily agreed, " sure, why not. " she had always wondered what it would be like. & she trusted korra, so she asked no further questions. no resistance was put up to the sheer force of air that gusted her straight into the other girl — her hands curling naturally around her biceps as she clung on, the safety of the ground left behind. the familiar lurch in her stomach might have resulted in a small shout that unfolded into astonished laughter & gleaming eyes— just like taking a bend at top speed.

" ... i think there's hope for you yet behind the wheel. you've got great adaptability. "

❝...The Avatar will protect you...?❞

A weak rally behind a weak chuckle. Because Asami's generosity makes her want to die. Or fall through wood slats, never to resurface. Or never speak to her again— which, incidentally, she’s tried. But. Rice. Paper. Walls.

She’s itching under the collar, she’s sweating in the chill evening air. Shouts clamour land-side for the glory of the night's first mischief, but it’s the one too-agreeable voice that sets her ears ablaze. The waters below lap nervously at the pier. She's almost sure she's about to spontaneously combust.

❝It's fine. Really. Jinora, Ikki, Meelo, and Rohan, they're family to me.❞

The shift in subject feels like a clean breath. She starts to move, gathering conviction, desperate for the distraction of said company.

It's much harder to spare a thought for the other stuff when engulfed in a mini vortex. That's when the Avatar comes alive, shedding the whispers of tension for hearty belly laughter. Not that she's avoiding talking- she wants to talk about all that's happened, but... look where that headfirst straightforwardness has gotten her before. She imagines spring's thinning ice with Asami, imagines the rush of words she's holding back as a sheer blunt force—-

she wonders what anger looks like on Asami.

Air scooters emerge before the picture emerges. Up stone steps, too fast for feet. She looks to her side in question.

❝I can- ❞ take you away like I did Mako ❝ -if you want...?❞

hands on her arms drew her in closer, sensing her uncertainty & aching to unburden her of it. she took it from her readily, now thrumming with frustration on her behalf. she'd found that happening more often lately, arched brows & silent criticism pointed right at anyone less than grateful for korra's help. she couldn't stop the pressure from coming from all angles but she knew she could provide some insulation to help keep her steady.

her hands fell to korra's, squeezing them tightly, " no one's perfect at everything, & you've helped so many people while we've been on the road lately. you should be proud. all those earth kingdom towns are better off because of you. "

her face tilted with an encouraging smile, hoping to help korra see what she did; she was a lot better at all this than she gave herself credit for. a few harsh words might have her bent slightly out of shape, but she had faith she could right herself with a little help. her forehead joined hers, " what matters now is making sure chun gets the help they need — & they wouldn't be if it weren't for you. this whole restoration trip was your idea. "

The smile lacks warmth. Or her signature spark, or maybe just sincerity. In truth, she's caught up in an earlier line of thought:

Do they? Has she?

She leans in, yearning for respite. Welcomes the sense of stability in the embrace. Korra already knows Asami's unequivocal answer if she chose to ask. She never has to. But...

public sentiment seems to love to disagree

no. matter. what. she. does.

❝It's just that... everyone wants me to be some kind of diplomat or politician lately- ❞ Her face tells it all. The role fits her about as well as a glove on a platypus-bear.

❝This- is something at least I know I'm good at.❞

But the people have spoken.

the sheer warmth that enveloped her, the smell of her skin, the way the avatar's voice vibrated straight through her from where she was pressed in — her body instinctually warmed it felt like being doused. she tasted something acrid sliding up her throat & she passed off her resulting expression as part of the aftereffects of what they thought she'd been through. a moment of reprieve was sought with locks of dark hair dangling between them; she could barely take the force of what she'd glimpsed in the avatar's eyes.

she piped up as her eyes squeezed shut, sighing words out in reply, " — right, it's all a little- murky right now... but I'm sure it'll start coming back to me, " hope & exhaustion clung to her speech as her hands gripped the edge of the bed on either side of her, her body rejecting the velvety soft way she spoke to her, the suffocating heat of her right there. she was the avatar — a danger to the world, never bound by any rules, the embodiment unchecked power that allowed innocent people to get hurt every day. & right now she was trying to bend her the same way she did every other stone in her path. she softened her mouth into a smile, peering her way to finally relent as she pulled herself together, " sure, i think i could use the quiet time before we get back out there... my head definitely feels like it's been hit by thousands of electromagnetic pulses. " her head was pounding, each beat telling her this was all wrong she shouldn't be here, she was playing a dangerous game giving into the avatar like this. they were both playing parts right now, trying to tug the other astray & onto a path of their choosing. she might not have been able to beat her earlier, but she knew could outsmart her, outmaneuver her, she had no doubt; she had learnt from the best. she would walk out of here free & with the avatar in tow as she had been tasked with. she just had to get this right.

her anchoring hold on the bed loosened, her hand gliding over the back of hers as she shifted backward. green eyes never left hers as her back sunk down onto the mattress, inviting her to follow. she chose to lighten the mood with a spark in her gaze & a humorous sway to her voice, " just to forewarn you, i might be lousy company right now, but... I'm really glad it was you here when i came to my senses. i'm- sorry you had to see me like that... i- have no idea what Guan even had me do... "

She hurtles into open arms. Into the crook of Asami's neck where the unfamiliar fabric is forgotten by grace of gentle brushing curls across her cheek and the subtle floral dabbed at the pulse point she now nuzzles. In her overwhelm, she misses the customary exclamation at arms wrapped always a touch too tightly. It doesn't matter. Everything is fine, everything is fine, everything is fine now that she is back.

With Asami, Korra has nothing and no reason to conceal. She leads with vulnerabilities and leaves the last of salt tears on skin as she's soothed back to clarity.

And she looks at her with the full weight of admiration.

For this woman who beats down brainwashing without missing a beat.

She repositions beside her girlfriend. Enough space to breathe after such an ordeal, but not so far that fingers don't still rest together. It'll be a long time before Korra is ready to disengage in full. Already she leans in, missing those eyes.

❝Less than a day. We were able to bring you back to Zaofu ❞ sometimes, when the soul returns to the body it needs a little help reorienting. Like waking up from sleep, or returning from the Spirit World. Maybe this is the same. ❝ - I managed to convince Su that the Avatar is all the guard she needs. She took— well, everything out of this spare room, but it's a lot more comfortable than a cell.❞

It all sounds so trivial now.

❝I can't wait to tell everyone that you're back.❞

Her touch doesn't abate.

Her voice is a tone lower. ❝But... I kinda want it to be just us for a little while more.❞

A little korrasami drawing I did for my sister last year that I thought might be due for some colour before pride month is over! Happy Pride to all my queer friends and allies ❤️

the gentle smile on her lips didn't melt away at the look she was being leveled with, confident she could smooth things over. her fingers brushed against her girlfriend's cheek, the other enveloping hers.

" ... well it is the first championship since they introduced air bending. everything's all uncharted & new, it is kind of exciting. "

she shifted closer, squeezing their interlocked hands as she raised an eyebrow in return, the corner of her mouth twitching, " ... & for the record, i was excited back then. i think you were a little distracted. " she reflected korra's expression back at her, light-hearted & teasing.  it was taking something out of her not to kiss her right now.

Oh wow, she really... did.

❝...Well, I wouldn't want to get in between you and the championship semi-finals.❞ That sub-zero tone and single raised eyebrow take the place of surprise. They say enough without falling into hot outrage — after all, Korra's been learning from the best in business.

But there are cracks in the ice. Of course there are, when the excitement so tangibly breaks through her more often withdrawn girlfriend.

❝You never seemed this pumped over our matches.❞

Only a tad accusing this time.

her lips parted at the sudden loss of contact, arms folding briefly across her chest as she gazed across at her, separated by their tent for the night. she didn't like seeing korra like this — looking at her with hot, stinging betryal. but that's what you got when you agreed to be the messenger. she found her hands lifting in defense despite no incoming attack, " it wasn't my idea but... Tenzin thinks that I should be the one who heads back into Chun... alone. "

she tried to smother the guilt spreading across her face as she took a step closer, stopping her hands gravitating from her sides to allow korra her space, " i'd really just be making sure my mechs are all working properly, considering the dicey terrain. hey — this isn't because of anything you've done wrong, okay ? it's not your fault these people happen to be great at holding grudges — " hundreds of years great.

❝Hey!— ❞

But the playful indignation is short lived, Korra's good-natured grin falling from her face just as quickly as her hand withdraws. The roundabout manner of Tenzin's directive plays like cleverly aimed strikes to her sore points. It brings up accusations abound aimed at the Air Nomad, alongside a healthy reawakening of taking his side again.

It sets her off preemptively.

Korra's two steps back before she knows it. With arms crossed and a little sharper than she should be with her girlfriend.

❝Well?❞