Sensitive-sailor - Sensitive Sailor

I don't know what I did to deserve you. Well, believe it, baby. I'm all yours.

And I finally see myself

Unabridged and overwhelmed

A mess of a story I'm ashamed to tell

But I'm slowly learning how to break this spell

No this is this universe

all my favorite kind of clouds ☁️🌱🌬

we exist in moments.

I love you to the moon and back 

You wait your whole life trying to grow up and make sense of the chaos in your world.

Only to find out you're gonna go even more crazy

Do you sometimes wish none of it happened?

Soo what can I do..run away?

But not too far

Two years ago when I was inpatient, I made a friend that I could study scripture with and offer up prayer requests. He offered to pray with me, over me, quite a few times... untii one night I finally agreed. We strolled down to the end of the hallway after groups had let out where it'd be quieter. He wrapped his arms around my shoulders, me being quite short and he taller, somewhat pulled me into his side as he began to pray.

"Lord protect her from the men here, for these men are like wolves coming for her... protect this woman, no this, well she's more like a - little girl- Father --"'"Lord protect her from the men here, for these men are like wolves coming for her... protect this woman, no this, well she's more like a - little girl- Father --"

At this point, my mind snapped out of the prayer and began to wonder. "Little girl??"

Who the hell is he calling 'little girl'! After he finished the prayer, I decided that I was fine being alone with my faith during my stay.

A few days later, in group, I had taken a seat at the table in front of the large room full of chairs so I could color during session. The table was there for those of us that found it hard to pay attention or focus, those who fidgeted a lot, and simply needed to multi-task.

The group leader that day began a discussion with a question. She asked if there was a time or way that we felt underestimated, or doubted, when we were judged with preconcieved notions based on appearance or other factors.

I raised my handn almost immediately, to which she called on. "I feel that way here," I started, resuming coloring the cute animal picture in front of me. "I find child-like therapy very productive and soothing, considering I didn't have any semblance of a proper childhood. It's good to nurture and reconnect with your inner child - I like coloring, stuffed animals, stickers, crafts - and because of this, I've even been called a little girl.

Which is quite the opposite of what I am. I have debilitating chronic illnesses invisible to most that I fight everyday and am truly a warrior."

I knew he was sitting in the room, and heard me.

I DO love stuffies and glow in the dark everything, stickers, puzzles, coloring books, crafts, juice, cartoons - all of it.

Our inner child is still there, always. Just hiding. After 28 years, I found her. 💗

Wings of the Cosmos by LhuneArt