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YOU HAVE ENTERED

RADICAL SATURDAY

GUYS GUYS GUYS

Have you ever had a bagel with cream cheese, cinnamon, and maple syrup?

Turns out it's the best thing ever

Tumblr, how did you come out to friends/family?

I had a vision…

“A little treat” has proven to be a devastating weapon of destruction against my moneys… but… science has birthed an equally powerful tool in the war against trinkets… I call it.. “but I shan’t”.

WEEE!! WEEEE!!! WEEE!!! YAYYY!! YIPPIE! WAHOO! AWAWAWA!!! WEE WEE WAA WAA WAA! ZWEEM !! BABABABA! YAHOOO WEE YAY WYEE !! WEWEWEE!!

Sometimes I think about how easy it is to fuck up a kid.

Like. I could just lie to them constantly--

Tommy, my fictional son: *holding an apple* What's this, Baba?

Me: Ah, that right there is a schmidalflapper.

Me: "oough. why do I feel so bad."

Also Me: *has eaten nothing but candy all day*