Terrible-hated-demon

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BPD CULTURE IS wishing that non-bpd people would understand how 90% of what people consider to be "manipulative behavior" from us is literally just.. us expressing emotions. Me expressing how I feel guilty for being so draining and apologizing for how I behave on bad days (ex: ghosting, or meltdowns) is not so I can win your affection or pity, it's literally just so I can explain how I feel in a way that you can understand me better..

It gets so tiring when everytime I try to express my own guilt and shame about my disorder I get accused of "guilt tripping" "manipulating" or "being attention seeking" instead of actually being recognized for how I feel.

Like, c'mon guys.. I'm a person too.. I'm allowed to be sad and feel lonely and feel guilty and I should deserve the same comfort/to be heard as much as someone without BPD 🥲

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Bpd culture is having two playlists for whether you love them or hate them

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nd culture is feeling like everyone hates you and not understanding why

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bpd culture is blaming yourself for them leaving, then blaming them, then hating yourself for blaming them because they still mean so much to you, then repeating that cycle all while knowing you'll never having a clear enough head or good enough memory to tell if you were the one being wronged or not

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“are you mad at me?” “do you still like me?” “are you sure you’re not mad at me?”

Okay so are we gonna take this to the bedroom or should I fuck the sense and reassurance back into you right here?

Bpd culture is shutting yourself down again because you relearned that whenever you speak up for yourself and defend yourself and explain your bpd symptoms everyone always finds a way turn it into you being the asshole so you regress back to being a palatable opinionless doormat because at least your friends didn't wanna leave you then

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