Theravenflies - Listen To ALL Disabled People

A list of pyromania symptoms one might experience.

Not a guide to diagnosis.

- the urge to ignite flames.

You most likely will feel the urge to start fires in some way, be it activating a lighter repeatedly or creating bigger flames by burning things. The urge can feel like an itch in the brain, a stretch in your fingers or just the sudden need to grab a lighter or fire source. It can be very intense at times, making it hard to resist the impulsion to do so.

- the urge to touch flames

Some experience the impulse to attempt touching fire. From putting your fingertips to a candle or lighter flame to putting your hand on a campfire or bonfire. This of course is a pretty dangerous and possibly self harming urge to have but the majority of the time the intent isn't to harm but simply to feel the warmth and sting of holding fire.

- satisfaction in fire

Many feel relief, relaxed or even euphoric once they've started fire. For many, fire is a sort of stimuli almost nothing else can give them. Watching a small flame dance or watching fire eat away ant kindling can be enough to satisfy the crave in their brain for that stimuli, however for some that still won't be enough, thus why the most commonly known pyromaniacs tend to be people who create much bigger fires than anything.

- stress or depression

More often than not you may feel mood swings due to the lack of stimuli your brain craves from fire. Going without it for long can cause some sort of distress that manifests differently for everyone and can become more intense the longer you are letting your brain crave to give in to the impulses. For some this comes as a depressive episode, high stress levels, anxiety episodes, paranoia and so on, often influenced by any possible conditions one might have in addition to pyromania or simply influenced by their environment. This can cause someone to lash out, isolate and shut down or even lead to them creating a bigger fire to relieve all that distress.

- lacking control

When struggling with an impulse based disorder like pyromania, you may experience a lack of control over your impulse, starting fire and lighting things without thought and being quick to give in to urges. For some this lack of control can be small, they are able to resist the impulses better than others, but for some this lack of control is large and they struggle intensely with the urge to start flames.

- feeling drawn

Many feel obsessed over or lured to fire and flames, an almost intense affinity of some kind for all things related to fire.

- purposeful sparks

Most fires pyromaniacs set are on purpose and if you have pyromania you likely experienced setting more than one or two fires on purpose.

- excitement

Plenty feel a rush of some kind just before starting a fire, almost a thrill in the anticipation or excitement at the idea of the act. Some feel this as glee towards the relief fire gives them. Very rarely is this ever sexual, if it were it would be pyrophilia, a different condition.

- hoarding

Some collect fire related materials like matches and lighters or candles due to their fascination for fire and always feeling the impulse to start one. Some may carry a lighter at all times just to watch the flame in small moments when the urge starts bothering them during the day. It's not uncommon to find a lot of candles or different lighters in there home in varieties, often a range of used, empty or new lighters. Some even keep all their lighters instead of throwing them away after they've emptied.

Unfortunately there is still a lot of research yet to be done about pyromania, it's causes and it's symptoms as it is not a very common disorder to have. Some even call it rare.

This does not mean that very little is currently known, plenty is known about the disorder so far and I intend on sharing as much as I can and making the knowledge as publicly available for free as possible, but there is quite a bit still yet to know.

I'm sure there are symptoms I missed for example.

While I have the disorder myself I am not a professional, nor in the medical field, and so there is much I myself may miss.

While I'm not an expert, I am open to answering questions and discussing as much as possible.

@clusterrune @delightfulweepingwillows @hewasanamericangirl

I see a lot of posts about how shitty it is to film disabled people in public and to make jokes when someone is having a medical emergency, and while in general I absolutely agree, there is a degree of nuance.

I have seizures, (most likely psychogenic/nonepileptic, I'm still going to be working with a neurologist to confirm my brain is intact though) and sometimes my friend @corypaws films them so that I can show my doctor. They have expressed guilt about doing this, but here's the thing: not only did I consent to this, it was my idea.

I had a seizure yesterday, and another friend, @thosegoodbois , made a joke about Caesar salad during it. They also felt guilty about this, but it was still incredibly helpful for me. On certain rare occasions, I'm fully conscious and aware for seizures. This was one of those times, so I heard everything. The people around me staying calm helped me stay calm too.

If a disabled person outright asks you to film them, you should really consider doing it. If a disabled person asks you to stay calm during a medical situation, you should at least try. Videos can be a very helpful diagnostic tool, and help make sure we are believed by doctors*. Freaking out when we have a medical problem might cause us to freak out too.

So basically I agree that in general filming disabled people and making jokes during medical emergencies is bad, but it's fine if you have consent.

Remember: disabled people are not a hive mind. At the end of the day, it should come down to what the individual wants.

*you probably shouldn't post it online though

what's the most upsetting ask you've ever received?

The one from last night where someone who claimed to be pro choice not only approved of aborting fetuses with Down Syndrome. In fact, they thought it should happen with every Down Syndrome pregnancy. I don't even want to post a screenshot of the ask.

There's also the death threats, suicide baiting, and rape threats, but those were for another blog.

Disabled people have to live somewhere poor people have to live somewhere you cant just exclude us from everywhere

wish for smart autism people to STOP saying things like "most autism people actually smart ! ". is not true! is just so erase big part of autism community ! of people like Pixie, and intellectual disability autism people !

STOP say , is not okay ! people like Pixie, people with intellectual disability , are BIG part of autism community ! we deserve be part of own community !

STOP try push out of community, is ableism !

As an autistic person I do not identify with the “autism creature” meme. I am an autism monstrosity, I am an autism beast, I am even an autism horror.

When I was a kid I kept failing classes because I'd lose my homework. I'd finish it, but between the dining room table and the classroom it would just walk away. Sometimes it ended up in my backpack, sometimes it didn't; sometimes I finished the homework at school and it got home in my backpack but wasn't there the next day.

To attempt to address this, my parents got me a neon orange folder to put in my backpack; it was my homework folder, all homework was to go into that folder and that folder only, and it was to only come out of that folder when it was being worked on. I was to put homework in the homework folder as soon as it was assigned and if I'd worked on it, put it back in the folder as soon as it was finished. The logic here was that using the folder was supposed to be automatic, and you wanted a bright color so it wouldn't get lost in the depths of a backpack.

I think I lost about eight of those before my parents stopped buying orange folders.

So it was very frustrating to search "how to be organized at work as an adult with ADHD" only to get a list that said "set alarms and write things down and try to make friends with a more organized person" which was immediately followed by tips to help your ADHD child stay organized and the one right at the top was to put their homework in a bright folder so they couldn't lose it.

If you have been harmed by the ADHD Tips Industrial Complex you may be entitled to a packet of fun-dip and a cactus cooler as consolation for losing your homework folder again.

Basic Respect for Cane Users

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Pic 1: A title card that says ‘basic respect for cane users’.

Pic 2: Not all cane users are: physically weak, slow, elderly. Some cane users can: run, lift heavy things, ride bikes, skateboards, etc. Cane users are not all the same.

Pic 3: Do: move out of the way for someone using a cane, give your seat to a cane user on public transport, offer to carry something for your friend or co worker with a cane, ask cane users what their access needs are, treat cane users with respect. Remember that not everyone with a physical disability uses a mobility aid.

Pic 4: DON’T: touch cane users without their explicit permission, make assumptions about whether someone 'really’ needs their cane, give unwanted advice about someones disability, make a cane user feel bad or like they’re an embarassment. Remember: people might not use their cane full-time, you can’t know if someone is faking.

An unpopular opinion that actually makes sense when I explain why I have it. (Well makes sense if you're not abelist)

I'm not too fond of the "I don't want to be led by the people that ate off of led paint and played in asbestos." Criticism against baby boomers.

Obvious abelism aside (the criticism is implying that baby boomers are less fit to lead because asbestos and lead severely negatively impacts cognitive functioning.)

But both of these mass disabling events are centered around a lack of knowledge that asbestos and lead has such a severe impact on cognitive functioning.

And I don't like that because many people today are also victims of a mass disabling event caused by a lack of information.

Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder.

Up until 2013. The only fetal alcohol diagnosis that existed was Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. And it's caused by severe alcoholism in the pregnant person, and the baby tends to have withdrawals after they're born.

Back then. It was believed if you drank while pregnant, you could still get lucky, and your child can be born "completely fine".

But very recently (I think it was in the early 2000s?) People started saying "No. They're not 'completely fine'. They don't have the classic signs of Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, but they're still impacted by the alcohol on the developing fetus." And it was in 2013 they realized that yes. Even "just one or two glasses" causes Fetal alcohol spectrum disorder.

It's estimated 1 in 10 pregnant women between the ages of 15-41 have had alcohol in the past month and 1 in 5 first graders have fetal alcohol spectrum disorder.

Fetal alcohol syndrome is pretty well known. They have a distinct face shape and learning disability.

But fetal alcohol spectrum disorder can (but doesn't always) have specific facial features. Other symptoms include

Trouble with emotional regulation

Issues learning

Low body weight

Loss of coordination

Issues with empathy

Shorter height

Hyperactivity

Holding attention difficulties

And you're thinking "wow. That sounds a lot like my autism/ADHD diagnosis". Yeah. Since it's not well known in its mild forms. It's often misdiagnosed as autism/ADHD and often times the best way to know is by straight up asking your parents if there's any chance your mom drank while pregnant.

I asked my mom, and she was one of those strict "I didn't even dye my hair while pregnant because I thought the chemicals would seep through my skin and affect the baby."

But like...

Let's not make fun of baby boomers for being disabled due to a lack of knowledge? When a lot of us Millennials and GenZ are probably affected by a similar lack of information.

-fae

Able bodied parents I'm begging you to teach your kids about disabled people. Not just because they could become disabled themselves one day but also because even if they don't, they have a very real chance of being rude to us if you don't teach them.

Yes, kids just say shit. They have no filter. That doesn't make it any less humiliating when your child sits near me on the bus and incessantly grills me on why I have a stick when I'm not old. Or laughs at us for things our disability causes. It doesn't take away the hurt when they bully a disabled classmate. For a large part these things could be avoided if you just taught your kids to respect us. It's really not that hard.