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The beginning. (Part 1)

So my husband and I have probably been transitioning into this Stag & Vixen lifestyle for just about a year, and a year may seem like a long time, but there’s a lot of different emotions you have to feel and go threw, there’s also a lot of talks with your partner of wants and don't wants. For me there was a lot of coming to terms with not being ‘monogamous’, after being in a amazing 12 year relationship and knowing my long term what just going to be fucking him was just flipped, its been quite the experience thus far, even though I haven’t made the official move YET. 

Now, at the beginning there was a whole lot of ‘what if’s’ in my head, the biggest ‘what if’ was, what if he was allowing me to sleep with different men so he could maybe one day use it so he could sleep with other women. From what I’ve read from other Vixens, this seems to be a pretty common worry at the beginning. I mean, 12 years of marriage and we have an AMAZING sex life (there’s nights we can go for hours still), but maybe he was thinking what it be like with another woman after so long? This ‘what if’ was probably the longest part for me to get over, and this took a lot of conversations with not only my husband, but with other husbands of vixens\hotwives. Talking to other husbands was probably the most helpful, lots of them had different views and explained how they felt about it differently. Id report back to my husband about what I learned from other men, and he would ‘yay’ or ‘nay’ if that's how he felt, and add his opinion. Then one day after many reflections, it just clicked and I got it, I mean I still kinda worried, but I understood where he was coming from and I could push that ‘what if’ away.

The not being so ‘monogamous’ wasn't as bad or as long as a process because in these last couple years I had made a really awesome group of friends, and after getting to know how they all knew each other, turned out the were all in some form on lifestyle. One of my friends was in a poly marriage, another one was dating her husband, another just had open relationships, and one couple allowed them to see the same sex for needs that could not be met with the opposite gender. I learned a lot from them by how they felt about how they chose what kind of relationship they wanted with their partners, and just all there different out looks on what they feel relationships to be. But the common factor between them all, communication. Everyone of them was open from the beginning of their expectations of ‘wants’ and ‘don't wants’. Learning this communication for us wasn't easy at the beginning, we had a lot of bad talks before those bad talks turned into talks. What once felt wrong, bad, and uncomfortable to talk about, weren't anymore, and it actually brought us so much closer. And learning to communicate our sexual relationship actually helped up in our everyday life. 

Hope you enjoyed part 1 and stick around for part 2 <3

Why hello my naughty little world ...

I'm baaaaaack 😈

Red lips and lots of cleavage kinda day 😏😈

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Yes!

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Big mood 😒

Open and Honesty

I feel compelled through messages I've received and comments that have been made in conversations for my next blog topic. Some men I feel sometimes think I'm being pushed into trying this lifestyle, and some men I feel think this is a "Hitch"esque teach/trainable thing my husband did with me.

I can assure to all who may think that, that neither of them are true. My husband is not and has never been a pushy person. He has always told me to go at my pace no matter how long it takes, and even if it does just remain a fantasy he’s perfectly O.K with that. We’ve been committed to each other going on 14 years, we’ve built that foundation of understanding and trust to be able to open up our relationship. This isn’t something someone should be pushed into. With that being said we opened up about trying this lifestyle two years ago, 2 years for me just getting comfortable enough and feeling out “playing” around with other men. Honestly at first isn’t an easy task, if felt wrong for a long while, took awhile to reprogram my brain to say this was O.K and my husband was fine and liked it. Not to mention the creepy guys who go after vixens, the filtering process is painful. 

I’m going to go at my pace to make sure our first experience is a good experience and not a negative one. The men I talk to I’m always open and honest from the get go, this is not a rushed thing for me. If topic or things are brought up that make me feel uncomfortable or I’m not into, I always let people know. I feel its just so important for all parties to just be open and honest just to make sure everyone happy and has a great time. I also want to feel the trust and insurance that if I cant go through it, or I try but need to stop he will immediately. Not that I have a problem flooring some guys for not listening and putting him in his place, I just dont want a tainted negative experience to wreck a potential chance to try it again a different time. Ya know?

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🙌 YES!🙌

Who doesn't like a little tease...😈😏

Right @primal-stag-husband ?