Moon Song, Phoebe Bridgers / Spirit Hold, Holly Warburton / Ketchum, Id, Boygenius / Inside Llewyn Davis

Greg Sellers, Undone Like Her Hair Come Evening, 10 May 2022

there is this horror at being left behind

starting line, luke hemmings / fleabag (2016-2019); s1e6 "episode #1.6" / working for the knife, mitski / x / it chooses you, miranda july / ryan o'connell / x / via flickr / aristos the musical / x / the hours, michael cunningham

image descriptions below the cut

1. Black text highlighted in grey on a white background reads, "I wake up every morning with the years ticking by / I'm missing all these memories, maybe they were never mine / I feel the walls are closing / I'm running out of time / I think I missed the gun at the starting line".

2. Frame from the TV series "Fleabag." A woman with short, brown hair is sitting at a restaurant table in front of a window. She has tears in her eyes. Text at the bottom of the frame reads, "Either everyone feels like this a little bit and they’re just not talking about it or I am completely alone. Which isn’t fucking funny."

3. Black text on a white background reads, "I always knew the world moves on / I just didn't know it would go without me".

4. An empty playground structure illuminated at night, in front of an open field and the starry night sky.

5. Text on a grey background reads, in all caps, "all I ever really want to know is / [white text on a blue background] how other people are making it through life. / where do they put their body, hour by hour, / and how do they cope inside of it".

6. Black text on a white paper background reads, "about how you feel more and more alienated from your friends each passing day and you're not sure how to fix it. It seems like everyone is just better at living than you are."

7. Blurry and grainy greyscale image of silhouetted people walking.

8. Worm's-eye view image of two silhouetted people holding hands while scuba diving. Black text on a white background in the top left and bottom right corners of the image reads, "I often wonder if life is easier for other people or they're just better at faking it".

9. Black text on a white background reads, "[Patroclus]: Remember what you once said about growing up? How it's like running after someone, but always falling behind?"

10. Text on a white background. Black text reads, "he was more lonely than the rest of his friends, he thought." Blue text reads, "but that's just not something that you talk about."

Zeewolde, the Netherlands

Thierry Mugler Spring/Summer 1999

Alain de Botton, Essays in Love [transcript in ALT]

Painting by Sasha Hartslief (b. 1974 Gauteng, South Africa)

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Marguerite Duras, from The Lover

Text ID: I feel a sadness I expected and which comes only from myself. I say I’ve always been sad. That I can see the same sadness in photos of myself when I was small. That today, recognizing it as the sadness I’ve always had, I could almost call it by my own name, it’s so like me.

“We dug a heart out of a heart and our mutual pain molded us into lovers in the evening fires of autumn.”

— Jovan Kotevski, from Love and Death; The Fourth Letter; Reading the Ashes: An Anthology of the Poetry of Modern Macedonia (ed. by Milne Holton & Graham W. Reid)

— Letters to Véra, Vladimir Nabokov

[text ID: Listen, my happiness—you won’t say again that I’m torturing you? How I’d like to take you off somewhere with me—you know how those highwaymen of old did: a wide-brimmed hat, a black mask, and a bell-shaped musket. I love you, I want you, I need you unbearably . . . Your eyes—which shine so wonder-struck when, with your head thrown back, you tell something funny—your eyes, your voice, lips, your shoulders—so light, sunny . . .]

I do not want to be a person.                               I want to be unbearable.

1. anne carson | 2. nick alm | 3. ocean vuong | 4. nick alm | 5. franz kafka | 6. nick alm | 7. emil ferris | 8. nick alm | 9. clarice lispector | 10. nick alm | 11. mary shelley | 12. nick alm | 13. sandra cisneros