early criminal minds (seasons 1-5) is so fucking funny if you think about it from the perspective of literally anyone that the BAU interacts with outside of each other. to recap what’s going on, let’s go over the team. We’ve got:
Elle Greenaway- murderous bitch who maybe murdered someone in cold blood (claimed self defense but who can prove that?)
Spencer Reid- a genius with both mommy and daddy issues who looks like a fourteen year old TA and does magic tricks whilst, at some points, zooted off his ass on dilaudid
Jason Gideon- man who screams at crime scenes and lays down in blood stains
Derek Morgan- calls their tech analyst like “ugh mommy shove that nice hot information down my throat”
Penelope Garcia- the aforementioned Information Mommy, who talks to the team (specifically morgan) like a phone sex operator trying to make enough to cover rent
Jennifer Jareau- bubbly blonde woman who yells at TV reporters and kicks ass
David Rossi- rich, elderly, famous crime novelist who DEFINITELY should be retired
Emily Prentiss- goth lesbian who DEFINITELY has cursed folks out in one of the many languages she knows
Aaron Hotchner- tired workaholic man, trying his best to hold this shitshow together, also beat a man to death
like, can you IMAGINE??? it’s the worst week of your life. Some madman is running around, i don’t know, killing folks and cutting off their nipples or something, and this absolute clown brigade rolls up like “ah yes, just another Tuesday for us lmao” and start asking you questions about what kind of dirt this murderer had stuck to his shoes, and then they SOLVE THE CASE???? what the fuck must you be thinking at that point
Hiii love your writingggg, could you plsss do very innocent!reader and pervy!ethan 🫶🏻
Hiii! I hope you like it, even though you requested this MONTHS ago.
I'm not innocent, so I'm not the best at writing it🙃 Hopefully this is okay:)
This contains SMUT - Minors DNI
Summary: You ask Ethan for help in econ, and once Mindy mentions the empty bedroom in the apartment she shares with Ethan and Chad, you agree to move in. But you realize that your sweet, dorky new roommate has been stealing your panties.
Contains: Pervy kinda creepy Ethan, innocent inexperienced reader, fingering. m!masturbation.
A/N: Okay...this needs a part 2 but I'm already at 5k words lmao. A lot of fics I've read along these lines had had Ethan more subby, but not in this one. 👀
*For the poll I posted earlier today, this one had the most votes at the time of me posting this fic. I'm going to write them all in the order that they're wanted:)*
It seemed like your life was starting to fall apart. You couldn’t stand your roommate, your boyfriend had broken up with you, and your grade for econ was starting to tank. When you brought up your grade to your professor after class, hoping to figure out some way to raise it, she suggested that you talk to Ethan Landry.
The next time you had class, you beelined towards him once he walked in. He noticed you, getting a little nervous the closer you got. He wasn’t the best at talking to girls, he even thought this could’ve been a figment of his imagination that the girl he struggled to take his eyes off was walking to him. He was chewing the inside of his cheek, his eyes not leaving you until you were finally face to face.
“Ethan, right?” you sweetly said, as he nodded. “I hear you’re the best for tutoring, and I desperately need your help if you have the time.”
“I’ll make the time,” he spat out, before he internally screamed at himself for sounding so desperate to help. “I mean, I can help you.”
“You’re a lifesaver,” you said, as you pulled out your phone. “What’s your number?”
“Oh, um…” he trailed off, racking his brain for those ten digits that he suddenly forgot. “I’m sorry, it’s been a long day.”
“It’s okay,” you smiled, “Are you okay with me just giving you my number and you can text me so we can set something up?”
“Yeah,” he said, as he pulled out his phone and went to create a new contact. He passed you his phone as you typed in your name and number, before you handed it back to him.
“Don’t forget to text me,” you said, a sweet smile playing on your lips as you turned to walk back to your seat.
“I won’t,” he said, tightly gripping his phone in his hand as you turned to smile at him once more.
He was struggling to focus as he sat through that class. His fingers kept rubbing over the phone screen that your thumbs had moved across, and he started to realize how pathetic he was for already being so addicted to you when you’d only spoken to him once.
Later that week, you were supposed to meet Ethan in the library to study. You both completely forgot about the renovations they were doing, the normally quiet space filled with the loud sounds of the various pieces of machinery on the opposite side of the room.
“Maybe we should try to do this some other time,” you yelled over the noise. “I can’t concentrate on anything you’re saying.”
“Oh, okay,” Ethan said, looking down so you wouldn’t see the sad look on his face. That’s when he started to get an idea. “My apartment is only two blocks away. It should be quieter. You want to come over to study?”
You liked to be cautious, and you normally wouldn’t go to someone’s apartment that you barely knew, but Ethan seemed innocent enough, and you desperately needed to pass the class so you wouldn’t have to take it again.
“Sure,” you said, wincing as the noise in the room got louder.
You walked beside Ethan as you went to his apartment, and even though it was just for studying, he felt a glint of pride as he walked with you. He hoped that anyone who saw you together would think you were his.
“Hopefully my roommates won’t be too loud,” Ethan sighed, as he stuck his key in the front door.
“Nothing is worse than what’s going on in the library right now,” you said, as he shrugged.
“You say that now…”
You barely made it inside when you heard arguing. Ethan sighed in defeat before he turned to you, “I moved in with my friends, and they’re constantly arguing.”
“Oh,” you giggled, as you followed him into the living room of the apartment. “Oh, hey Mindy,” you said, as she turned to you and smiled.
“Hey! What are you doing here?” she asked, as she walked over to you. Chad just stood there, still worked up from the spat they were having when you walked in.
“Ethan’s trying to help me not fail econ,” you said, as she nodded.
“I remember you mentioning you were having trouble with it.”
Ethan was confused as he stood there, because Mindy had never mentioned you, but she seemed to know you quite well. The two of you talked for a few minutes, and once Ethan heard another guy’s name get mentioned, he immediately got jealous.
“I’m proud of you for not giving him another chance,” Mindy said, as you let out a small laugh.
“I’m not going to say I didn’t think about it, but I don’t need him making my life any harder than it needs to be right now,” you sighed, “On top of the bullshit with him, my roommate is just so awful. Like, she woke me up blasting music before the sun even came up today. I’m trying to find somewhere else to live, but I haven’t had any luck yet.”
“Well, we’re looking for a fourth roommate…” Mindy trailed off, as Ethan’s eyes grew wide. “It’d be nice to have another girl here.”
“Don’t tempt me,” you joked, as Mindy smiled.
“Seriously, think about it,” she said, before she started to yell. “Chad!”
You noticed that the other boy was no longer in the room, but you saw him again as he turned the corner and groaned. “What?”
“Okay, don’t be rude,” she snapped, “I’m trying to convince her to move into the fourth bedroom.”
“Oh,” Chad said, his annoyed face turning up in a smile. “Hey, I’m Chad.”
“Hey,” you said, before he started to go over rent and other things you’d need to know. “Why would I want to move in when you two argue like this?” you joked, as Chad tried to play it off.
“We shared a womb, we lived in the same house until we moved into our dorms, and I finally got a break from her,” he said, as she scoffed, “But now we have to live together again and we’re trying to figure out how to do that.”
“I’ve never lived with boys before…and I’m sure my parents would kill me if they ever found out, but I’ll definitely think about it,” you said, before you turned to Ethan. “I’m sorry, you want to study now?”
“Yeah, let’s go to my room,” he said, as he led you there.
You both got settled on his bed. He sat across from you, his back against the headboard as you adjusted to get more comfortable, laying on your stomach. He bit his lip once he noticed the perfect view he had down your shirt, the neckline barely covering anything as your chest was pressed against his bed.
“So, where should we start?” you asked, your soft voice barely getting his attention as he kept staring at your chest. He wanted to squeeze your boobs, suck on them, fuck them, even. “Ethan?” you questioned as you looked away from your notebook, and opened your laptop, completely blocking the sight he was fantasizing over.
“Oh, uh…” he said, as he opened his laptop. “Maybe let’s work on the quiz that’s due this weekend. It’ll show me what you do and don’t need help with.”
You spent over an hour studying with Ethan, and you felt like you were having a little bit of a better understanding. You were starting to get hungry, so you closed your laptop. Ethan glanced over his screen the second he noticed, getting another peak down your shirt again. This time, he saw a part of one of your nipples peaking out of your bra, the sight making his pants grow tighter. He fought off the sound that was threatening to come out before you sat up, once again taking his perfect view away from him.
“I’m starving,” you said, as you started to put your stuff away. “But thank you so much for your help, and I hope you’ll want to keep helping me. You’re my only hope.”
He softly chuckled at your words, “If you move in, we can study whenever you want.”
“You’d be cool with it?” you asked, smiling at him. “You didn’t really say anything out there and I didn’t want to actually start considering it until you said something.”
“Yeah, I think it’s cool,” he said, “If you do want to, and you need help moving or anything, let me know.”
“Thanks, Ethan,” you said, smiling again before you made your way out of his room.
He wanted to walk you to the door, but he knew the second he stood up, his hard cock would be so obvious. He ran his hand over the spot you were laying on the bed, your warmth still soaked up by his comforter. The view down your shirt was burned in his brain as he got up and walked over to the door, shutting and locking it before he dropped his pants to give his aching cock the attention it desperately needed.
The next time you had econ, you walked in and sat down beside Ethan. He didn’t notice at first, but he soon smelled the familiar scent that he couldn’t get out of his head after you’d left his apartment a few days before. He wasn’t sure if it was your hair or the perfume you were wearing, but it smelled delicious.
“Hey,” he smiled, his pupils growing large as he saw you. “Are you okay?”
He took in the stress on your face, and how tired you looked.
“Yeah, are you sure you’re cool with me moving in?” you asked, “Because I can’t deal with my roommate anymore.”
“Yeah, of course,” he said, “What happened?”
“She invites her boyfriend to stay over whenever she doesn’t have class the next morning,” you sighed, “I don’t want to explain all the sounds I had to listen to while I tried to sleep last night.”
“Oh,” he said softly, “Well, your room would be beside mine, and I wouldn’t keep you up all night.”
“I bet that’s why I’m failing this class right now. I never sleep,” you said, as you looked over to him. “Wait, you don’t have a girlfriend that stays over?”
“No,” he said, his cheeks turning pink at your question.
“Sex is overrated,” you shrugged, “But I really thought you would’ve had a girlfriend.”
“Really?” he asked, as your professor walked in.
“Yeah, you’re a cutie,” you smiled, before you directed your attention to the lecture.
Ethan was thankful that you were so focused and didn’t see the cheesy smile on his face. The girl he’d been thinking about as he jerked his cock for the last few days called him cute, and his heart was swelling.
After a couple weeks, Ethan, Chad, and Mindy showed up to the apartment you currently lived in while your roommate was at her boyfriend’s to help you move.
“First, I want you guys to know that none of this mess is mine,” you said, as soon as you answered the front door for them.
“Whoa,” Chad said as he glanced around. “There’s no way you live with a girl.”
“Yeah, you’ll never guess what I found on the kitchen floor this morning,” you said, as Mindy started to think.
“With the mess, I’m going to guess…dead mouse?”
“Not even close,” you said, as you shook your head and shuddered as you thought about it. “It was a condom.”
“Like…in the wrapper or…?” Chad asked, as you, once again, shook your head.
“Used.”
“Ewwww,” Mindy said, cringing at the thought. “Okay, is anything in the kitchen yours?”
“I already boxed that stuff up. Except the dishes that she’s refused to wash,” you said, as you led them to the living room. “The TV is mine, and that lamp,” you said, as you pointed, “But other than that, I really just have to worry about my room.”
“I think it’d be best to have all the heavy stuff in the living room so Ethan and I can worry about that,” Chad said, as you nodded and led them down the hall.
You had already packed up most of your room, which made it so easy for your new roommates to help you. Once Chad was carrying your mattress out and Mindy had ran out to get coffee, Ethan started to glance around your room. He noticed the hamper full of clothes in the corner, and he found himself inching closer towards it as he listened to you and Chad talk in the living room. Before he could stop himself, he grabbed a shirt off the top of the pile, inhaling its scent. He let out a deep breath before he went to put the shirt back in the hamper, before he noticed some black lace sticking out under a pair of your jeans. He snatched it out of the basket and put it in his pocket before he put the shirt back in it once he heard footsteps coming back down the hall.
“Did you need help with this?” Ethan asked, pointing to the basket, trying to make it not seem like he was being weird.
“Shit, I forgot to do laundry,” you groaned, as the realization hit him that the panties he’d grabbed had been worn. “I’ll carry that out.”
“Okay,” Ethan said, before Chad motioned for him to help with the dresser.
Later that day after you got your stuff moved into your new room, you flopped on your freshly made bed as Mindy popped in.
“So, I’m going to try to convince the guys to share a bathroom so you don’t have to share with Ethan,” she said, as you shrugged.
“It’s not a big deal,” you said, “I just hope he doesn’t mind all the girly stuff in the shower and the makeup and stuff.”
Ethan didn’t mind at all. In fact, he’d already been in the bathroom, smelling your body wash, your shampoo and conditioner. The skincare products you used. He realized that all those things together were the cause of the scent that made his head spin.
Later that night after you had takeout with everyone, Ethan excused himself to go to bed. He couldn’t stop thinking about your panties that were still in his pocket. Once he pulled them out, he ran his fingers over the lace before taking in your scent. He softly groaned before he dropped his pants, the thoughts of his face buried in your pussy making him harder by the second. He had them tightly clutched in his fist as he started to stroke himself with his free hand, small whimpers flying out of his mouth as he tried to imagine how soft your hand would feel wrapped around him. His bottom lip was in between his teeth once he started to get louder, the tip of his cock red as be brought himself closer to the edge. Just as he was about to cum, he deeply inhaled the scent of your panties one more time before he rubbed them against the tip of his cock, his thick, white ropes covering the lace.
You thought living with boys was going to be difficult, but your first month wasn’t bad. You were surprised at how clean they liked everything to be, and Ethan always put the toilet seat down. You started to get close to your dorky roommate, especially once you spent so much time studying together. You already thought he was cute, but once you actually got to know more about him, you realized that he was so sweet, so nice. He might’ve been a little shy, too, but he got to the point where he was doing cute little things to make you laugh.
One day, you went to do your laundry in the apartment. You walked over and were about to throw stuff in when you noticed clothes were already inside, and Ethan quickly rounded the corner with the rest of the stuff he needed to toss in.
“Shit, I’m sorry,” he said, “You want me to take my stuff out? I can wash it later.”
“No, it’s fine, I’ll wait,” you said with a smile, before you noticed something familiar in the washer. “Oh,” you said, your cheeks turning pink as you reached out and grabbed your panties out of the washer. “Must’ve dropped these in.”
Ethan’s eyes grew wide as he noticed them in your hand, the realization hitting you that they were sticky.
“Eww, what is all over these?” you said, a disgusted look on your face as you tried to figure it out. You looked over to Ethan, his face bright red and his eyes huge, when you pieced it together. “Ethan…”
He just stared at you, the silence deafening as he tried to think of something, anything to say to you. He’d gotten away with stealing your panties for a month, but it was a way for him to feel close to you, and satisfy some of the sexual frustration he had whenever he thought about you.
“What’s on my panties?” you questioned, as he tensed up. “Actually, I don’t think I want to know.”
You tossed them back in the washer and walked past him and headed straight to the bathroom to wash your hands. When you went to your room and shut the door, Ethan huffed and tossed in the rest of stuff that was in his hands before he started the washer.
As the day went by, you couldn’t stop thinking about Ethan, and how you’d noticed that pairs of your panties had been going missing ever since you moved in. But then you’d randomly see them again, in the top drawer of your dresser after a few days. You didn’t think Ethan was like that, and it made you feel a little uneasy to live with him.
Later that night, you had to say something to him. You walked out of your room and glanced around the apartment for him, before you walked to his closed door and started to knock. He eased it open after a few seconds, his eyes connecting with yours through the small crack.
“Can we talk?” you asked, as he took a deep breath and hesitantly opened the door for you.
You walked in and took a seat on the side of the bed, your gaze on his floor as you tried to think of the right way to talk to him.
“You want me to leave the door open,” he asked, barely above a whisper as you shook your head no.
“If Mindy or Chad come home, I don’t want them to hear the conversation.”
“Thanks,” he mumbled, before he took a seat beside you. “I’m sorry.”
“Why were you stealing my panties?” you asked, as he took a deep breath.
“I can’t explain it without sounding like the total creep you probably already think I am.”
“So…that was what I thought it was on them,” you said, as you turned to look at him. He nodded, looking away to not meet your gaze.
“Again, I am so sorry,” he said, “I know you probably hate me, and I understand if you don’t want to be around me. I’ll stay in my room so you don’t have to see me.”
“I’m just a little confused,” you said softly, as he finally let his eyes connect with yours. “What’s so exciting about my panties?”
At that moment, one thing you said to Ethan started to play in his head. ‘Sex is overrated.’ He was questioning how much experience you actually had.
“Do you really not know or are you fucking with me?” he questioned.
“Like, does it feel good? How does it even turn you on?” you asked, curiously staring at him.
“They uh…yeah, it feels good when I uh…rub them on myself. And they smell like you.”
“They smell like fabric softener and laundry detergent,” you said, a small laugh slipping out as he shook his head.
“I haven’t been stealing clean ones…they smell like you.”
“Oh,” you said, as you looked away from him. “That turns you on?”
“You have no idea,” he said, and even though the conversation was uncomfortable, he was getting hard.
“Why are guys so weird?” you thought out loud, laughing a little as you shook your head. “So does that mean that you like me? Or you’re like…sexually attracted to me? I still don’t fully get it.”
“Both,” he said, “I think you’re so beautiful, and I’ve had so much fun with you this last month…but I also think about you in a different way, too. Ya know?”
“I’ve thought about you that way, too,” you admitted, “It’d kind of hard not to. I hear you through the walls all the time.”
“You’ve heard me?” he asked, a blush spreading to his cheeks. “I’m sorry, I know you hated when you heard your old roommate.”
“I like it when I hear you,” you said so softly that he barely heard it.
“Do you touch yourself when you hear me?”
Your breathing got heavier at his question, and Ethan noticed. You were getting so flustered under his gaze.
“I…I’ve tried to,” you said, as you took in the curious look on his face.
“Tried to?” he asked, “What do you mean?”
“Like…I know what feels good, but I can never get myself…there, if you know what I mean.”
“You’ve never made yourself cum?” he questioned, admiring how cute you looked as you got embarrassed.
“No one has.”
“No one?” he asked, his throat dry at the thought. “Are you a virgin?”
“No…but I’ve never enjoyed sex. Like, it feels good, but I think it’s so disappointing when you hear how amazing orgasms are and then I just never get one.”
Ethan expected the conversation that was happening to go so differently. He thought you hated him, but there you were, telling him that you’d tried to get yourself off when you’d heard him. The thought of him being the first one to make you cum had him salivating, but he didn’t want to make you uncomfortable if he offered.
“Have you ever…given someone an orgasm?” you asked, as he nodded. “I’m jealous of whoever she is.”
“Don’t be,” he said, scooting a little closer to you. “Fuck, I’d make you cum all the time if I could.”
“Really?” you smiled, “If you ever want to, I’m right next door,” you joked, as he smiled and shook his head.
“Hey, don’t offer that or I’ll be in your room every day.”
You were starting to squirm against his bed, your thighs rubbing together so subtly that he could barely tell. The sexual tension was so thick, your breathing getting heavier as you thought about how good Ethan would make you feel.
“I think I need to go back to my room,” you said, as you started to stand up. That’s when you glanced at Ethan’s lap, noticing the tent in his sweatpants.
“Do you really want to?” he asked, “Because if you want me to take care of you right now, I will.”
“Seriously?” you questioned, as he smiled and nodded.
“Come here,” he said, reaching out to grab your hands, pulling you to him.
Once Ethan leaned in to kiss you, he was almost taken aback by how quickly your lips were moving against his. He was desperate for you, but you were just as desperate for him. He matched your pace before he pushed you back on the bed, his hand running from your hip, up your ribs, until it landed on your breast. You gasped into the kiss once he squeezed it.
You had massive butterflies in your stomach once you felt his cock pressing against your thigh through his sweatpants, your head was spinning, but you were loving every second of it.
“Hey, I have an idea,” he said, once he pulled away to catch his breath. “I think we should go to your room.”
“Why?” you asked because you didn’t want to stop. You needed his lips back on yours.
“Because you have that full length mirror leaning against your wall,” he said, chuckling once you noticed the confused look on your face. “I want you to see what I’m doing to make you cum…in case I’m never here to help you.”
“Okay,” you said, as he stood up and grabbed your hands.
Once he opened his bedroom door, he listened to make sure he didn’t hear anyone else in the apartment before he walked out and to your room next door. He shut and locked your bedroom door once he made it inside, before he pulled you into another kiss. His hands held onto your hips until they started to rub against the flesh under the hem of your shirt. He kept inching it further and further up, until he pulled away to pull it over your head. His lips went back to yours as he reached around to unhook your bra, his hands squeezing at your breasts once they were free.
His mouth moved to your neck as his hands explored your body, before they snaked under the waistband of your leggings. He moved them down over your hips as you shimmied out of them, leaving you in nothing but your panties. He recognized them as the first pair he ever stole, the black lacy ones.
“Fuck,” he mumbled, as his hand moved to rub you over your panties. The material was soaked as you moaned at the feeling. “That feel good?”
“Yes,” you said, quickly nodding your head just in case he needed the extra confirmation. “So good.”
“I hate that I have to take these off you,” he said, as he inched the fabric down your thighs, leaving you completely nude in front of him. “I’m going to sit on the floor in front of the mirror, and I want you to sit between my legs.”
“Okay,” you said, as he took a seat on the floor, his legs spreading for you to sit. You did as he said, looking at him in the mirror as he spread your legs, placing your feet on either side of his legs on the floor.
You watched him lick two of his fingers before he placed them against your clit, rubbing slow circles. Your eyes stayed on the reflection of his hand, your mouth parting as you started to breathe faster. He added a little more pressure as you fully relaxed back into his chest, the softest moans slipping out as he went a little faster.
“Ethaaan,” you whined out, the noise quickly becoming his new favorite sound.
“Shh, I don’t know if anyone else is here,” he said softly, “Just keep your legs spread for me, baby.”
He rubbed a few more circles on your clit before his fingers moved lower, one of them slipping inside you. He pumped it in and out for a minute before he added another, as you angled your neck to look up at him. He leaned down to kiss you as his fingers moved, before he started to mumble against your lips.
“If you ever finger yourself, this…” he said, as he curved them just right, a low moan flying out of your mouth, “Is the spot that needs attention. Okay baby?”
“Okay,” you whimpered, as he moved his fingers faster.
The sounds you were making just kept getting louder, and Ethan was just hoping and praying that no one else was home. One of your hands clung to his thigh as your other hand wrapped around his wrist, as you started to feel…different. It felt so good, and the last thing you wanted was for him to stop. Once he went even faster, the squelching sound of your wet pussy and your whimpers filling the room, your legs were trying so hard to close as your toes curled against the carpet on the floor.
“Oh my god,” you moaned, your fluttering eyes watching his hand in the mirror as your body started to tingle.
“Cum for me baby,” he encouraged, as you finally let that feeling wash over your body. You were jolting, your eyes screwed shut as his fingers started to slow, his free hand roaming your chest as you let out all your sounds.
Once you fully relaxed in his arms, he placed a kiss to the top of your head as your hazy eyes connected with his in the mirror.
“Now you can’t say no one’s ever made you cum,” he said with a smile, as he slid his fingers out of you. “Did it feel good?”
“That was better than I thought it was going to be,” you said, “Thanks, Ethan.”
“You’re welcome.”
You sat there in silence for a minute as you felt his cock pressing against you, and you wanted so badly to take care of him, until you heard commotion in the apartment.
“Hey, guysss,” Chad yelled, as he walked down the hall.
You tensed up as you glanced at your door, before Ethan whispered, “It’s okay, I locked it.”
You relaxed again before Chad started to yell again, “Tara’s here!”
You forgot about hanging out with Mindy and Tara for the night, and you didn’t want to pull away from Ethan, but you hesitantly did, your legs wobbling as you tried to stand. Ethan got up to help you, and once you got your bearings, he started to grab your clothes off the floor for you.
“Thanks,” you said, before you noticed him pick up your panties.
“No, thank you,” he joked, a smirk playing on his lips as he backed towards your door. “I’ll see you when you get back in the morning.”
“I better still have panties in that top drawer when I get back.”
CONGRATULATIONS SAG-AFTRA!
me personally if i lived in haddonfield and i saw micheal myers in person, id scream without the s but idk thats just me.
Just so it's clear: Thundercest shippers stay the hell away from me. I will never understand why incest and rape and other fucked up dynamics are so popular in fandoms filled with children.
Could you write a Jim Halpert fic? I want it to be an x reader who has a lot of tension with Jim and one day they just need to fuck to get it out.
Jim's a tease for sure, so tension is inevitable. Hope you like it! (If not you can always request something else if requests are open!!)
Jim Halpert x Coworker!Reader
Warnings: Use of Y/N; Smut; Plot-ish; Semi-Public Sex; Teasing; Tension; Almost Getting Caught; Big Dick Jim (obvi); Fingering (fem receiving); Missionary; Office Sex; Desk Sex;
Author's Note:
This contains smut, so if you are not 18+ (or 16+ because lets be real here) do not interact with this post! If you like, reblog, comment, or follow me, I will block you! I can't stop you from reading this, but knowing you are makes me uncomfy, thanks!
Michael called an "end-of-day" meeting to, which he had been trying to make a regular thing for a few days now, in order to talk about, well, whatever he wanted. Currently, he was saying something about the Halloween party coming up. It was hard to focus with the chairs being so close together, it made the small "meeting room" kind of hot and stuffy. Either that or the fact that Jim's hand was brushing your thigh, his shoe inching your pant leg up slowly, then letting it drop back down. You couldn't tell if he was doing it on purpose, or if he was messing around.
He had been doing this for weeks now, and you never had the courage to tell him to either stop or take him into the bathroom and have him right then and there. It started with him "accidentally" bumping into you and grabbing your hips to steady himself, or grazing your hand as he walked by. At first you made the excuse that it was a small office, he had a desk right next to yours, and even that he was just clumsy. Then he started to be more touchy. He would put his arm around your shoulder when you guys were talking to people. He played it off as a "friendly gesture", but you knew it wasn't when his hand would graze the side of your breasts, or play with your hair, tugging every so often. It got to the point where you couldn't be around him without him touching you in some way. It wasn't like you didn't like it, in fact it turned you on. You just couldn't tell if he was messing with you.
Which brings you to now. His hand slowly inching to your inner-thigh, his shoe messing with your pant leg. You were focusing all your attention on not squirming in your seat. You didn't want to bring alert any of the other people in the very crowded room.
It wasn't until he removed all contact that you snapped back into focus, noticing everyone getting up from there chairs. You quickly got up, ready to get out of there, your body buzzing with arousal.
You were bending over your desk, logging out of your computer, when you felt a pair of hands on your waist. You gasped at the sudden contact and whipped around, meeting Jim face to face. By this point everyone was either gone, or heading out the door, the only one still there being Michael, who was in his office with the blinds closed.
"What are you doing?" You breathe out, barely able to look him in the eye.
"Saying hi. Do you... not... want me to say hi?" He asks, smirking, his eyes half-lidded.
You could barely breathe, his hands, still on your hips, were slowly making their way underneath your shirt, and up your waist. His soft, strong hands rubbing up and down your soft skin.
You finally get enough sense to do something, and reach up, grabbing his neck, pulling him down and forcing your lips together. He groans into your lips, moving you backwards until you bump against your desk. His tongue prods your lips and you immediately let him enter your tongues clashing against one another, teeth bumping each others. He bites your lip causing you to moan, muffled by his mouth pressed against yours. He moves his hands to your ass, about to help you jump onto the desk behind you when you both hear a thud coming from Michaels office.
You both immediately separate, realizing you could be caught at any moment. Your hands go to your shirt, pulling it back down and smoothing it down, while Jim's hands flatten his hair back down. Michael opens up the door to his office, grabbing his things, and leaves to get his coat.
He turns to the both of you and says, "Have a nice weekend you guys! Remember to get the cupcakes for the Halloween party Monday okay Jim?"
"Yeah, yeah. See you Monday!" Jim says, his gaze making its way back over to you.
Michael leaves, the door closing with a loud thud, and Jim's hands are immediately on you again. This time he grabs you, actually lifting you onto the desk, and immediately one of his hands goes to the button on your pants, the other going to grip your hair as he shoves his mouth against yours.
He breaks away from your lips for a moment, his warm breath fanning against your lips as he says, "Are you sure about this? It's fine if you don't want to, you know."
"I think I am going to go crazy if you stop now," You say, laughing softly.
He chuckles, diving back into your lips, his fingers wrapping around your hair as he unbuttons and unzips your pants. You take your hands off of his chest, where they were grabbing at his shirt, and slide your pants off, dropping them to the floor. His hands leave your body and go to undo his slacks, pulling them, along with his boxers, down to his knees, his hard length popping out and hitting his stomach. It takes everything in you not to groan as you wrap your fingers around it. It is girthy, making you unable to wrap your hand around it fully, and very lengthy. He pulls away from your mouth as you glide your thumb over his tip, spreading the precum dribbling down his shaft with your hand.
"Fuck, Y/N. You don't know how long I've thought about this," Jim moans in your ear.
You pick up the pace as you answer, "I bet about as long as you've been teasing me. If I had to guess, of course."
His laugh turns into moans as I rub my thumb across his tip again, moving his hands to your thighs. He moves his hands higher, until they are right where you want them. His fingers pull at your panties, pulling away from you for a moment to look you in the eyes.
"Are you-" You cut him off by pressing your mouth against his again.
"For the last time, yes. Yes I am sure. No I am not going to regret it. Now please touch me Jim," You say, clenching your thighs together, needing to relieve some of the pressure.
"Fine," He says, shoving you onto your back.
He pulls your panties off quickly, throwing them over his shoulder, and rubs his fingers through your slit. He groans at how wet you are. He spreads your wetness through your folds, stopping every so often to rub circles into your clit. You slap your hand to your mouth to muffle your moans.
Jim reaches his free hand up to pull your arm down, "Let me hear you, Sweetheart. Come on baby."
You whimper as he pushes a finger into you, slowly massaging your clit with his thumb. His long, slender finger reaches places inside of you that you could never reach on your own before. Your pussy squelches with wetness as he shoves another finger into you.
You look up at him, his eyes never tearing away from your wetness, seemingly hypnotized. He thrusts his fingers in and out of you faster, each time they come away soaked and glistening, before he shoves them back in again, curling them deep inside of you, hitting that spongey spot inside of you. You try to find something to grip on the flat surface of your desk, unable to find something to keep you grounded. Jim, noticing, grabs both of your wrists with his large hand and pins it to the desk above your head, inserting a third finger, with slight resistance, at the same time.
"So tight, baby. Gonna come on my fingers? Please come for me Sweetheart," He says, leaning down to kiss your face, your neck, your shoulders, as he thrusts his fingers faster and faster, his thumb continually rubbing your clit, the pressure overwhelming.
You moan a string of curses as your pussy clenches his fingers, the coil of pressure inside of you bursting. You try to clench your thighs closed, but he leans down, his shoulders keeping you from doing so.
He slowly stops moving his fingers inside you and takes them out, looking you in the eyes as he licks them clean. He groans like he hasn't ever tasted anything as delicious as you.
"Made a mess, didn't you?" He asks softly.
You nod, barely conscious enough to do that, still coming down from your high.
"Think you can do it again f'me? Hm?" He asks, bringing his hand down to pump his dick which is dripping with precum.
You nod again, "Mhm. I can do it Jim, promise."
He smiles down at you, "Ok pretty girl, let's see."
He pumps his cock a few more times before he slowly inserts it into you, a wet squelching sound emanating from your folds. He groans and his head falls backwards as he thrusts into you, the base of his dick meeting your hips. You moan loudly, straining against his hand holding your wrists to the desk. His other free hand grabs your right leg and pushes it back and out slightly, allowing his to thrust into you deeper and at a new angle.
"Fuck Jim, faster please," You moan out, your eyes beginning to become unfocused.
His thrusts become faster, rougher, the sounds of skin on skin echoes around the office. If anyone were to walk in there would be no hiding what the two of you were doing, no lying your way out of this one. That thought only made you clench harder around Jim, causing his hips to stutter.
"I'm so fucking close Y/N," He whimpers out between thrusts, taking his hand off your wrists in order to circle your clit again.
His thrusts became erratic, forcing you to grip his arm that was holding onto your thigh. You gripped the edge of the desk behind your head with your other hand to stop you from moving on the desk. Your vision went white as you came, your pussy clenching Jim's dick causing his hips to stutter, pulling out and coming on your soaked folds and thighs.
"Fuck. Fuck Y/N," Jim muttered as he slumps down in your office chair that was pulled out from your desk.
"Yeah... How the hell am I going to sit next to you Monday?" You ask, half joking.
"I guess we'll just have to do it again," He responds, smirking at you.
Reblog to have the most homoerotic year of your life 2024
I plan on doing kinktober this year, as you can read from the title! I plan on going all out and doing as many kinks as I can get to this year, so any recommendations are highly appreciated! Pretty much anything goes! The crazier the better! I made a post previously (the one before this one) with my hard no's and maybe's on it, so check that out if you want before you request anything!
Thanks for all the support!
Here is the list so far!
Menophilia ~Menstruation/Period Blood~ (Billy Loomis)
2.
3.
4.
5. Non-Con (Charles Lee Ray)
6.
7. Wax Play (Jack Sparrow)
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.
13.
14.
15.
16.
17.
18.
19. Asphyxiation ~Choking~ (The Riddler/Edward Nashton)
20. Bondage-Webs (Peter Parker)
21.
22. Masochism/Dacryphilia ~Crying~ (Chandler Bing)
23.
24.
25.
26.
27.
28.
29.
30. Coulrophilia ~Clowns~/Piquerism ~Cutting the Body with Sharp Objects~ (Art the Clown)
31.
jj: emily loves jacuzzis
prentiss: sometimes i pretend i've been captured by witches and they're making me into human soup