I Think The Funniest Thing You Could Do To The "give Me Liberty Or Give Me Universal Omnicide!" Guy Who

Colored digital comic. Panel one: Bill Cipher, wearing the Theraprism prison uniform, sits in a crummy chair with arms and legs crossed glaring off to the side irritably. Somebody off screen says, "WE HAVE A NEW
PATIENT JOINING US TODAY! THIS IS BILL FROM EUC—" Bill interrupts, "THE NIGHTMARE REALM." Off-screen speaker: "RIGHT. WHY DON'T YOU TELL US ABOUT YOURSELF?" Bill: "(SIGHS) YEAH, SURE. THE NAME'S BILL CIPHER. HENCHMANIAC HEAD HONCHO, EVERY DREAMER'S WORST NIGHTMARE, EVERY NIGHTMARE'S WET DREAM, RUINER OF KINGDOMS, DESTROYER OF DYNASTIES, OVERALL CHILL FUN GUY, BLAH BLAH BLAH. I'M HERE BECAUSE I ATTEMPTED TO CONQUER EARTH."

Panel two: Bill looks up irritably as a new evil-sounding voice off-screen shouts, "HA! "ATTEMPTED"?! YOU PATHETIC FOOL!"

Panel three: Bill floats out of his chair, shaking with rage, as he says, "WHAT! AND JUST WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? YOU THINK YOU COULD DO ANY BETTER, BUSTER?!"

Panel four: we see over Bill's shoulder as he glares at Aku from Samurai Jack, who's sitting in another chair, also wearing the Theraprism prison uniform, giving Bill the smuggest smirk you've ever seen.

Panel five: still smug as hell, Aku says, "WELL, SINCE YOU ASKED..."

I think the funniest thing you could do to the "give me liberty or give me universal omnicide!" guy who tried & failed to conquer Earth is stick him in group therapy with the guy who successfully conquered & tyrannically oppressed earth for thousands of years.

A few weeks ago in one of my servers we got asked "what other villains do you think could hold their own against Bill in a fight?" and then "what other characters do you think would get sent to Theraprism?" at almost the same time and I haven't been able to stop thinking about subjecting Bill & Aku to each other since.

Colored digital comic. A floating orb of light with two disembodied hands and sunglasses rushes down the hall, one hand holding a walkie-talkie and the other grabbing the doorknob to a utility closet. It says, "DIRECTOR, I'M ISSUING RED ALERT. TWO OF THE DIMENSIONAL TYRANT WARD'S MOST DANGEROUS PATIENTS ARE MISSING. BILL CIPHER AND AKU. NOBODY'S SEEN THEM FOR HOUR--"
Panel two: the orb opens the door and lets the hand with the walkie talkie droop as it trails off, "RRSSSS..." Inside the supply closet are Bill Cipher and Aku, both wearing Theraprism uniforms, apparently romantically entangled with each other inasmuch as a triangle and a wiggly column of darkness can get entangled.

Panel three: Bill and Aku disentangle enough to look at the orb, both looking terrified. Both their clothes are half undone, Aku's lips are puckered, Bill's tongue and lower fangs are sticking out from beneath his eyeball, Aku's got Bill's bow tie around his beard, and one of Bill's eyelashes has been seton fire by Aku's flaming eyebrows. The orb and the two prisoners stare at each other silently.

Panel four: The orb slams the door, quickly turns away, and says into its walkie talkie, "NEVER MIND! BOTH PATIENTS HAVE BEEN LOCATED," pauses, then says, "DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT."

I think they'd hate each other's guts.

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