Xk1llp0px - Salem

hello my name is patrick american’psycho pierce&pierce bateman and i kill people (that’s how i got my name). i have a 700 step skincare routine and a tanning bed in my house and a lot of people tell me i look like christian bale (AN: if you don’t know who he is get da hell out of here!!) im a yuppie but my teeth are straight and white. i have tan skin. im a businessman and i work at an office building where i’m a stockbroker (but i don’t really do anything) i’m rich (in case you couldn’t tell) and i love name brands and buy all my clothes from them. for example today i was wearing a lightweight linen suit with pleated trousers, a cotton shirt and a dotted silk tie all by valentino couture, and perforated cap toe shoes by allen edmonds. i was walking around outside the laundromat. it was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which i was very happy about. a lot of poor people stared at me. i put my middle finger up at them.

“hey halberstram!” shouted a voice. i looked up. it was…..paul allen!

@seanceofghouls Nihil and Bestie revived/j

Two????

girl i forgot to post this

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN...... HER!!!!

Sawtober 14: Faith

AU where Vergil disappears at the end of DMC3 and later finds Nero, whom he believes to be Dante’s illegitimate son, and trains him at the boy’s request (and also cuz he secretly cares for Nero’s safety but shhhh).

not sure if I hate this or if I think it’s just mid 🤡💔

My most joyless, pedantic, Niel DeGrasse Tyson ass take is that I find the "Biblically Accurate Angel" meme annoying. I cannot see that joke without going "UHM ACTUALLY-"

I swear, does anyone like 80s thrash metal anymore!?!?

Hi, this is Jayson and Alejandro, and their love life is sooo complicated and quirky 😍

Have you ever dated a boy who would later be framed for your murder? NO? WELL, YOU'RE JUST IN LUCK- YOU CAN EXPERIENCE IT FIRSTHAND THROUGH THE EYES OF JAYSON HIMSELF!

What happens when your shitty wannabe thrash metal band tries (and fails) to tour without a manager and proper supervision in the shittiest part of the us? Murder! Murder! So much murder! Cmon guys. It's 1980-something. The cops seem to be even dumber than they are now!

Him and Jonathan definitely did it STANKY style